How would you like to improve yourself and your life next year? Is there a piece of advice or counsel you received in the past year that could guide you?
Trust yourself. It's Sugar's guiding principle.
I want more joy! I need Adonai to help me to trust in Him more
Take one day at a time, one step at at time, one breath at a time. I need to believe more in myself.
I am praying that the court case zettles and I will have disposable income to travel as well as be able to join a pool where I can swim all year.
Things don't need to be perfect. Don't be so focused on it all being according to plan and then you in turn miss out on life. Live life - the rest will fall into place around it.
I would like to be more conscious, in the way that meditation can make me conscious. The advice is: "be still." I would like to follow that advice more frequently, more consistently. In fact, I would like stillness to be the basis of my days.
I would like to get out of my own way. I would like to balance my physical limits against my emotional needs. I would like to be more comfortable leaving the house.
You will never not have anxiety, you are just going to go through life with anxiety on your side.
I need to get off my butt and do something. I've gotten real lazy during the last few years. I complain about how my life is but need to realize it won't change unless I take action.
Stay focused and follow your Heart.
I've been saying this to myself and to others for a while, but seriously: learn to code. For my employment prospects if nothing else, I need to develop at least some coding skills, and I need to do it basically right now. If I ever want to be more than what I am right now, then I need to expand my skillset.
I'd like to work I my Southern accent. I'd like to lose 5 lbs. I'd like to exercise by walking a few days a week. I think if I'm patient and go one step at a time. I can achieve all the things!
Stay present, keep moving things forward and celebrate!!
I would like to be more patient and a better communicator. I would like to release some of my self-centered tendencies in relationships and be better about digression in expressing my opinions. I would like to be healthier and maybe a pants size smaller. But more specifically I would like to have a more consistent exercise habit (coupled with a shower). Keep it simple. You can't change people, only pray for them. I believe in myself and deserve to be treated well. drink water. take care of your vagina. stay away from rappers. stay moisturized. love yourself.
I would live in this moment and this day knowing that yesterday has pasted and tomorrow is not promised. That does not mean that I should not have hopes and dreams and work towards them but that I remember it is important to not be looking ahead so much that I miss the beauty of this day. It does not mean that forget yesterday with all it's lessons but that I don't spend so much time looking back that I fail to see what is right in front of me so I trip and fall and lose what I have right now. Living in the moment is about treasuring what you have and seeing the wisdom that is gifted to you each day. Living in the moment is about loving what you have and not what you have lost or can't get. Living in the moment takes being discipline and determination but it can be done and I can do it . So it the coming year let me live in the moment of each day no matter what that day brings. Let me live fully in this way
I had the most wonderful evening last week at the proms with Grandma - I planned it all for her 90th birthday, with a fancy dinner upstairs and then seats at the front of a box, and it was a wonderful program by the St Petersburg Philharmonic with Rach 2 and Scherezade. But the real highlight was just being in Grandma's company for a few hours, and how easy and cintillating and enjoyable that was. I'm worried about living so far from her so much of the year this year, and I'd really like to make sure I keep nurturing that relationship and enjoying her company,
I'd like to loosen up on judgements. I tend to let people be who they are, but I hold myself to impossible standards, rigidly clinging to a morality script I inherited, which no longer fits the play I want to be in. Let it go. Change your standards of success.
Study, make, improve, be yourself, don't stop please, don't stop, be yoursel, recover your dignity.
I'd like to look for the humanity in others. The thing that I can respond to with love. Individual people can be horribly infuriating, but there's something wonderful and lovable in each of us, and I want to do more to look for that.
I would like to be healthier and stronger physically and mentally. I would like to be working in some way and either support or help support myself. I would like to live in a healthy place, whether that be get Chisholm healthier, or new place. The lessons of this past year (few months) are ones of compassion, and love and support and being able to take that in and realize I deserve it, and it is a mitzvah for the supporter/friend/ giver.
I would like to get back into a healthy routine of exercise. I miss how I felt when I put myself first. It was two years ago after Rosh Hashanah that I began my journey into yoga and self care after a horrible few months. Life is pretty good these days so there is no room for excuses in my life, even though I seem to make them daily.
Expect less. In fact. Expect nothing. Lose expectations completely. See more. Live more. Do more. Be more. Have fun. Go on adventures. Save money. Eat right. Exercise a little, not too much. Write. Keep writing. Don't stop writing. Smile. Smile right now, more, broader. Live from your heart and be thankful. Know that you are blessed. Know that the dark times pass, they always do. Lose the fear of missing out. You're not. Just be. Just live.
Build on general physical strength and confidence. Taken from a quote: "You can talk about your fear of elevators but you have to eventually get in and ride one if you want to overcome your fear." In other words, talking about building physical strength and confidence may be good to talk about and recognize but you eventually have to put the work into it to achieve your goal.
Well, I want to get healthier. I have started this past week eating better. I began Weight Watchers again (on my own with materials I already have) and I have my mind set and determined to stick with it this time until I reach my goal. I want to begin with eating healthier, and then incorporate more movement (physical activity) into my daily life. Not really advice, but more a real life example, and that would be my co-worker. Just looking at her and how far she came is very encouraging to me!
Continue to empower the daily practice - small self investments physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually every day as the back-bone to total health and growth.
I would like to feel calmer and more organised. I would like to compliment more and grumble less.
I wrote yesterday about wanting to lose weight and become stronger and more fit. I love to exercise, but I truly struggle with eating. Food is much more than just a way to get nutrients into my body. It is comfort; it is fun; it relieves boredom. I am probably a binge eater, because I eat long after basic hunger is satisfied. I don't know how to overcome it, but I do know for me, it has to be action without a lot of analysis and soul-searching, with which I become impatient. My guiding advice would be Nike's: Just do it.
I would hope that I continue to grow and evolve in my work, my painting, and my personal/spiritual path. The only piece of advice that I can take in, or that I can teach, is still that of ruthless self-awareness. I also hope that these times of intense personal scrutiny might lighten sometimes, and that I can have the experience of joy more often. Right now that is hard to imagine.
I would like to improve myself by continuing to stay fit, get fitter, leaner, healthier joints. Improve my memory if that is possible. To improve my life, we are moving to a new state and new jobs. I hope to have a better home and better job. A continuing strong loving relationship with my husband. It's a cliche, but life is a journey and we must continue strongly on the path no matter what we come up against. I lost my dad this year and the loss is with me every day. Some days I stay strong for him. I stay on the kind and gentle path for him. I stay strong for my Mom. I can improve myself by being a better daughter, sister, Mom, etc. to others.
Oh, I would very much like to lose some of the excess weight I've been carrying for too many years, and I would like to reduce the clutter in my home and create a peaceful place for us. The best advice has come from "The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up." Less is definitely more. I know this. Now I just have to find a way to put it in practice and to live it..
In the past year I've learned that being able to effectively multi-task is a myth! I'm continuing to work on being present and listening with intent to what people are saying. I sometimes miss the subtleties or the details, which can have serious consequences in both my work and personal life. In the past if someone said, "Do you have a minute?", by immediate response would be, "Sure." Lately I've found myself saying, "I'm busy right now, but I can help you when I'm done." That often gets a shocked response, but I stand firm, even when someone persists.
I would like to live more in the moment. To enjoy being with my children rather than always hurrying them along. Work is a priority but my family ought to be THE priority. Working toward that this year.
Live 24-6 and increase my observance and enjoyment of Shabbat. I love that phrase and there is only one direction to go with it - to do even less on Shabbat. Simpler food is a start we made this past few months and even more quiet
I would like to 1.) Finish 30 day drawing book 2.) Make at least 10 books in addition to the Drediel Books Make at least three calligraphy art pieces
"It's OK to be scared, it just proves you are doing something brave."
I would like to lose weight to manage my health as well as I manage my family. I also would like to learn something new, like coding. Time is what I have the least of and what I need the most.
Erica, says Aliza, you don't have to live your entire life in one day.
I'd like to better commit, whether it's to doing a particular activity, living with certain values in mind, or whatever it might be. I'd like to not shy away from focus, to not be so compelled by diversity that I never really go deep in any area.
I would like to overcome that which holds me back. Fear, self-doubt, shame, unworthiness, slouth keep me from participating fully in my life. I would like to develop the patience and stillness to hear the Voice within, and then have the courage to act. i want to be living my best life while helping to repair my little corner of the world. i learned more of Process Theology by reading God of Becoming and Relationship by Rabbi Artson. In the process of chosing each next best choice, i will be on my "path." God please help me choose the highest, best choice and then help me find and use my courage to act.
Certainly I'd like to lose five pounds and to bicycle with my wife a few times a week. I haven't found a way to do my research work again now that the "temporary" interruptions to it (administrative jobs) are over. That work is a big piece of what feels worthwhile about my life, and for the past fifteen years I haven't given it enough. Partly this matters to me because I don't like feeling that I _can't_ do the work, which is a pretty cheap and unimportant reason. Anyway it's hard to separate that from just wanting to give the work what it deserves.
I would like to feel and show more compassion. I'm not sure I even know what this would look like. I would also love to live with more passion. I'm not sure what this would look like either. But I'm spending a lot of, too much, time reading and wondering what I could, should be doing. Not enough time getting much done. A piece of advice? "Most mental and emotional illness is rooted in the failure of people to accept the legitimate pain of accepting their freedom" Dr. M Scott Peck, Road Less Traveled
To accept others for who they are... This sounds very difficult and it is, especially when others were raised to believe differently from yourself. In theory, it sounds so politically correct (accept people who they are) but when you get down to it, if one persons custom is to comfort someone in need and another persons custom is to wait for the person to ask for help, there isn't always a meeting of the minds. Accept others for who they are ...
Last year I said find a new place to live. And while I did not accomplish that and it still stands, I think I will phrase my goal a bit more generally. I would like to find a better quality of life and a better work life balance. I feel all I do now is work or drive to work. That needs to change. I need a life outside of work wherever that may be.
I want to do a better job of living each day to its fullest.( which my mom used to say to me daily..).... related to this I did hear a wonderful bit of counsel while on a recent voyage across the atlantic.. the thought for the day was something along the lines of "Imagine you had a bank account into which - every day - was deposited about $86,400. At the end of every day the balance would go back to zero. You can't keep any of the money from one day to the next..if you haven't spent it than it's lost forever. Now realize that you have exactly that sort of bank account: each day you get 86,400 seconds. By the end of the day - if you have not used every moment wisely - they are gone forever. " Each moment is truly that precious and I want to do a better job of using this gift as best I can.
I want to learn how to and actually do the work of jettisoning false beliefs, especially old tatters hanging on that no longer serve me, or even interfere with my best progress. To actually let them go completely, forever, making space for newer better truths and more purposeful action.
to improve: 1- continue to learn what's important 2- try to focus on what's good now, not what's the perfect situation in the future. advice: relax, take it easy, live the moment, give up the illusion of control...
I want to take the time to nurture me, and not just my children. I get this idea in my head, and then find that I don't have the time, or schedules interfere, etc. I just don't make it happen. I want to make it happen. I want to get to know friends in person again - and move my relationships back into real life from the cyber-world. I want to take classes and enrich myself in ways that I have been eager to do for so long but never gotten around to. I want to value me, and not just me as mom.
Be true to yourself.
Lose weight. Get a new job.
I would like to let go of anxiety about my husband's children. They are grown, with their own children and they both live on another coast. I love my stepson; we have worked hard to make a good relationship, but his wife is hard to reach. Her mother committed suicide when she was a child, so I understand why she is a bit empty. His children are nice but I don't feel any special bond. They are coming to visit in December and I don't want to lose sleep over how things will go. My stepdaughter and I have a "professional" relationship, in that we pretend to be okay, but there is a deep rift which will never heal. I take responsibility for my part, but according to my therapist, she is jealous of my children and the fact that I did not give birth to her. She too will be coming here for a couple of days next month with a girlfriend, and though they will only stay two nights, I want to be my best self. I can fake it, but at a psychic price. I wish she were more genuine so we could have an honest relationship, but I understand this will most likely never happen. I care about her, but can never relax when she is around because she watches me and how I interact with my daughters. I really would like to be able to handle these visits and my relationships with them in a way which is mutually beneficial. In other words, I would like to be able to look forward to seeing them with anticipation rather than dread. My beloved mother told me many years ago that I didn't have to love them, or even like them, but I had to be nice.
I am immensely proud of the fact that I stayed active this year and managed to run my first ever half marathon. I hope by this time next year I have run my second, only faster! I think for this in particular I would say to myself - push yourself, you can do it.
I want to keep weightlifting and lose all the pregnancy weight after the baby is born in December. I want to try to get enough sleep so that I don't feel fuzzy or unproductive at work.
i think i'd like to get more organised. i'm chronically messy and pathologically disorganised, and i think working on that would be good.
Same answer I've had every year of my fat life. I'd like to not have to carry so much weight with me every day, everywhere I go. I have worked so hard at this my entire life against the assumptions and judgements of others. I have successfully stopped eating wheat, stopped eating sugar, I rarely drink, and I'm in the process of quitting coffee. I am starting to exercise. I would like to be unencumbered and have lower blood pressure. I'd like to feel a pride in my appearance that I haven't felt for many many years. It's extremely difficult to control your body in this way, and I'd like to feel lighter after so many years of so much loss, I want to lose something I WANT to lose.
Make it as an artist with an income that allows me to keep working as an artist. Persist until you succeed.
I would like to improve my life by wasting less time, obsessing less about other people, getting more writing done, and being slow to anger.
I know it's tough to be patient in these times but realize that time is not important and money isn't important. You can keep your youth and energy through positive energy and proper investment in self. The investment in self might look different than in the past. So just gotta keep adjusting to what you need each moment. Allow yourself to feel it.
I would like to be more independent when it comes to activities I want to do. Instead of not doing them because I don't want to do them alone, I will find friends who have the same interests
Travel more, spend less, save more. Improve health. Spend more time with family and friends.
Well, there's always trying to learn how to cook. I am so lazy in the kitchen, and this is the only area where my fiancé and I fight. I would make him really happy if I learned to cook, and take more of an interest in the kitchen. Sounds so silly, but this is a big area where I need to improve. I'd also like to keep writing and finish projects!
I want to keep reaching to improve my quality of life.I hope to keep my goals for personal health in focus and not get distracted from that by work. I do not want to go backwards, only forwards. I want to be sure that those people in my life that are not positive are not a huge part of my life anymore. This all would involve looking out for myself and putting some of my needs before others. I have a tendency to think of others and never myself.
I think these questions are either for someone younger, or less settled than I am. To improve myself or my life? The only things are things I do already every chance I get: travel more, read more, write more. I really don't plan to do much differently than I am already doing.
Being less reactive, being more aware of the moment and the greatness. Being grateful for my blessings
I am finding that through Mussar I am actually becoming a better person in the world. And has been unnoticeable on a day to day basis, but now that we are considering what our background middah will be for next year, I can see changes in who I am. I want to continue to grow in this way. I don't know what that will look like in terms of what I need to do, since I really didn't do very much and my Mussar practice this past year. I had started journaling but did not stay with it. I have not really done any more reading. I have not spent a lot of time thinking about the current middah before talking with my mussar buddy every week. It is a practice that seems to work even if one doesn't "work" it. Makes me wonder how well it work if I do "work" it!
Singing, working out, eating right are the basics I need to keep up with. and my therapist and doctors. covering the basics and adding long term consistency would be the best way to extend this good place I have found - and selling the house and getting out of debt.
This past year, I came up with my own piece of advice: "Be a better you." Every day, every year, I want to work to be a better version of myself. I want to study more, volunteer more, be more considerate, work out more, etc. This next year, I want to continue to become better.
My "sticking" point for a while now is my weight. I hope this will be the year that I finally lose some weight. I just have to be more disciplined. It is for my health, as well as I just want to look and feel better about myself. I just have to look around and see what happens to people that don't take care of themselves. That should be my motivation.
honestly I don't know exactly what and where and why and how, the path is so foggy.. all I know is my heart is my compass. if only my compass would be more clear as to where north is! that's how I would like to improve though, to be in a better place where I don't have to shake myself up so much just to get myself to get up in the morning.
relax more take care of my body eat better breath
I've finally gotten serious about tracking my food intake, exercise and weight. I expect to see significant weight loss by this time next year. Not only that, but a very healthy lifestyle change that affects my relationships and work life as well, for the better. I want to inspire people to do better for themselves. I've begun a weight training regimen that guides me and keeps my momentum going.
I think I said last year I need to work on compassion, still working on that. I need to do more. I need to work on my plan for post-retirement, but put as after I leave the University. Still struggling with what I want to be when I grow up. From the many people who retired, I have been given the advice to do it now, you won't regret it. So far I have not taken the leap.
Financial stability LOVE
Overall health - I want to cultivate a general sense of well being, where being tired, overwhelmed, or in pain for some reason or another is an exception to the norm... Didnt really receive any useful advice in the past year...
I want to be braver and bolder. I want to learn more about Buhddism and letting go...to be secure in the solitary personal life I seem to be destined to live. Three things I absorbed this year: - Lets kick the shit out of option B - Let me not die while I am alive - Don't wish today away
My (well I think of her as, not sure she does, but I'm hard on people, the same as I am on shoes) best friend always tell me when I'm scared 98% of the time "to get into my grown up body". I can't get into all of it now, the picture has grown too large for me to handle. It's all too much for me all the time which is so weak, so lame, so not what I wanted. B I want the courage to end it if that's what I really want but not if it's just a cop-out because I'm too scared. I don't know why but I mean it, and if I insist on being so pathetic and bullshit to myself my whole life and can't Stop being hooking and find a fun way to earn a buck and write then fucking end it. You're just getting uglier and grumpier. Otherwise what I want to improve is have my own little place, a garden, veggies and a few animals. That's what I would like to see or sayonara - got it?
Just kick ass. You know what to do. Make good choices and do what needs to get done.
I would like to keep practicing mindfulness techniques and get better at being more mindful (without having to follow a book for instruction all the time) so that I can feel less critical of others and myself, not feel so overwhelmed by unpleasant feelings and situations, and hopefully, experience less pain and illness that I believe is induced by stress and anxiety.
From this morning's convo with J.H. about challenges in our spiritual community: sometimes we hesitate to speak more directly because we want the right nuance to come through, but sometimes we are just too timid. I have a hard time telling people hard truths-- I just want to assuage people's discomfort. But no! Speak the hard truths more boldly. Lovingly, but directly.
Oh man. I feel like a one-track person, but I really am quite happy with myself besides my weight. And it's such a struggle for me.
You are the source of your own supply! You are meant to be where you are, you're not an imposter! Find a mentor. Don't forget about your family. Put your phone down sometimes. Smile. Say hello to people. Ask questions.
would like to have a place to live and not be homeless again and keep my cat no advice
My meditation teacher reminded me that meditation practice in our tradition comes from our heart center, not our brain area. The Tibetans use a term that means "heart-mind" when talking about the mind. My wish to improve myself and my practice is to keep it centered in my heart. "Meditation: it's not what you think."
Be open minded. Keep trying new things and be open to new experiences. Keep working to be less judgemental. The world is full of great people, and being open will open your world to them.
The guiding advice for this year: Fully engage with graduate school, but don't let it obliterate other important aspects of your life. The difference between an A and an A- is not significant. The aim is NOT perfection. Take advantage of the other opportunities grad school offers (like attending outside lectures or shadowing off campus) besides classroom learning. Make friends and have fun!
Always a weight issue that needs to be worked on. As someone said, Just Do It!
I would like to improve myself and my life next year by being true to myself, and not letting people step all over me. This year was a challenge for friendships and relationships, and I think the best advice I have received is not to let those people keep you from living in the moment.
Continue coaching deeply and integrating it into your life and develop your product. Learning from the past year - Between XMA and Coaching I have learned so much. a) Hogan - skepticism b) Balance - perspective
Live. Love. Laugh. I think that I have made some progress this year but I really want to enjoy my family, friends, home, work and be engaged wherever I am so that I can experience the present.
The meta-challenge with this question is to pick one thing that matters and not just go into a litany of all the things I don't like about myself. I think I'd like to get better at my mindfulness practice. Not just is keeping up with the discipline of meditating every day, but also in my mindset throughout the day. Noticing my feelings and thoughts without being hijacked by them. Noticing my anxiety about being good enough in my job and reminding myself that I am enough. I don't have to be better than my colleagues. I don't have to have the same strengths as my colleagues. I hold steady in the perspective that my best authentic self has value. Anxiety and worry undercut what I am best at.
Know that I'm not the only one suffering. (From last nights sermon) Be grateful and stop feeling sorry. Lose weight. Stop eating.
Take better care of my health by eating better and walking more so that my diabetes values stay under 5.7. Intellectual my courses for next year are already booked, so that is no issue. Spiritually I hill go more to Ira's services. I enrolled in a yoga class as from early November. Sharpen the saw...
I'd like to cultivate a daily spiritual practice--I don't know if that means the morning prayers or what, but something every day. I want to see if it teaches me something. I'd like to use my body more, healthily. Jogging? Brisk walking? I'd like to face how I lie to cover my tracks, cope with spaciness and depression. I want to be very honest. I want to spend lots of time with my parents. And: If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.
I'd like to be able to maintain and sustain the sense of gratitude I've experienced within the incidences of frustration I've felt this past year. Ex: I don't like taking medication and getting to and from PT is a pain (no pun). I'd like to get back doing the water workouts I did when the JCC first opened. The point being, the benefit is worth the frustration.
I need to listen to D, who tells me all the time that I should just do what makes me happy...and write the novel!
In the next year, I'd like to be less isolated. I know that my isolation is self-imposed and exists from an inertia that comes from fear that I won't be acceptable out in the world. The verse that keeps sticking with me, which is not obviously related but I think is, is "God was in this place, and I, I did not know it." If God is in a place, there is a place for me. And God is everywhere, so there is a place for me everywhere. But I, I do not know it. I hope to work on that this year.
I would like to find more patience and work on being more positive and appreciative. One thing that I think might help is to slow down and focus on one task at a time instead of multi-tasking.
I wish I could find the gumption to finally get control of my weight.
So many ways! Would love to lose about 40 pounds. Become more fit (specifically how? I can't even guess what's feasible). And just generally sucking less T everything. The only thing I can think of, advice-wise, is to think not just about ENERGY as a resource, and not just time and money. That finding something that gives you energy is just as or even more important than finding something that saves time or saves or makes money. The next step, though - figuring out what gives you energy - just seems insurmountable. I can't remember the last time I had energy for something.
I need to dig deeper...not assume I am so good, so strong, so "right". I would like to admit my failings and flaws sooner, before I have the chance to dress them up with pretty ingredients. Sometimes a cigar needs to be just that...a nasty, cancer stick.
I would like to ask more questions when dealing with family vs. giving advice. I am good at this when working with people outside my family, but less successful at remembering to do it with family. I would like to continue to find successes at work, be collaborative, move up, increase my salary, my position, my successes. I would like to be a part of seeing my organization succeed in a difficult time of transition.
I would like to learn to live in the moment & not be paralyzed by fear and anxiety. I would like to be able to challenge myself, conquer my fears, so I could make every moment in my life more richer, enlightening, & broader for myself & those close to me, especially my son. I would like to live with hope & remain positive as my son's prognosis is very good. I wish I would not be consumed by other people's outcomes, research, & statistics of this disease, and be able to accept I can't control this disease anymore than I can control the weather. I would like for my son to be proud of me, feel supported, & offer him added enjoyment to his life, not worry. I wish I could be satisfied that I gave my son all the research I could find & we made the best decision. I wish I wouldn't feel so responsible for the outcome & course of treatment. My son telling me to stop grieving his living body. My son telling me the worst part of his disease was having to tell me, worry about me, & that he just wants his mother back. Someone telling me it's not like I found some voodoo doctor with some bizarre treatment. To stop acting as if I'm responsible for his getting leukemia in the first place. A friend telling me I'm upset because my son is sick, not because of his course of treatment. Also, that in five years my son will probably be fine & I'll be sick from worry.To stop letting cancer define my life & my son's life when he is the patient & is enjoying his life in lieu of treatments. To be grateful that there is a cure for his illness, that my son is the most amazing young man, responsible with a great attitude, to be grateful I have friends who care. To be grateful we live in a city where we can obtain the best treatment. I am grateful I had the courage to live my passion of being a musician. I don't know how I could've gotten through this or many other difficult times in my life without it. I have met the best of friends through playing music because you share the deepest part of your soul with them. I am grateful for the sarcastic humor I am able to engage in with my son & friends. Never let anyone tell a young person they can't live their dreams because the financial rewards aren't there & it's irresponsible. You can find a way if you truly are passionate about your calling in life. It is irresponsible not to give your most precious gifts to the world & just live to work, pay bills, & have things. Things aren't moments spent sharing love, laughter, & life.
Falling in love with Garry has been a challenge. I need to learn patience and trust that a new life will work out.
Be more careful with my spending habits. If anything, I learned that what stuff I had was causing PTSD nightmares, because it was, at the time, to please people who were later unmasked as abusers.
make time for more sleep.
I need to enjoy life more and worry less. I think my life will be simpler in the next year.
I'd like to not automatically make issues about me - in the past year I came to realize that growing up I never felt special - that I was the center of attention - so often when others seems self-centered to me - I make demands that in a way says I'm important - you have to consider me & my demands and make me feel special - Michelle is the most obvious case - & then I get in a repetitive trance that says this is what I'm going to do so this person(s) has to treat me as special
I would like to become less critical and more friendly to people, with me iniating some get togethers. Because I do not mind being alone, I tend to do so unless someone asks me to do something, etc. I'd like to more open to celebrating our differences without judgement. I'd also like to not feel my two cents is worth saying all the time - and, when I do speak up, do it calmly and with thought versus just blurting out whatever without a filter.
Trust God for the future, no matter how crazy our world has gotten.
Does Shia LaBeouf's "JUST DO IT!!!!!" rant count as advice? :D Maybe, maybe not. I'll just take one day at a time, though. How would I like to improve myself? That's hard. Not that i think I'm perfect, mind you. It's just hard to see through the fog. We all need improvement in all areas of our existence. I suppose I'll improve as I go, spotting what's in need of immediate improvement and... doing it! :)
I'd like to give a little less fuck.
Trust the essential nature. Bend into essential nature. Experience gratitude, don't just think about it. Be more curious. Operate from less fear.
I would love to have mastered being calm and happy in all situations.
I want to be me, and not always strive to be more like person X who did this thing better than I did, or friend Y who has that temperament I envy. I want to feel more comfortable in my own skin, with my quirks and imperfections.
The recurring theme seems to be those I love want me to be more compassionate in my speech. I've been working on it but old habits die hard. Next year I hoped to have a marked improvement in the way that I communicate with those I love. My speech with exemplify the love and tenderness I have for them.
Understand, believe, remember, live by: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." It's okay not to know what to do in life. It's normal to feel lost, confused, incomplete, in progress. You will never feel "ready" for life. But "the longer you wait for the future, the shorter it will be."
Be happy and don't be too cocky. Life is good.
I've been thinking lately about being friendlier, and very specifically smiling more. I think most people, including me, would be surprised if we knew what our faces and body language conveyed to others. I think our internal perceptions of ourselves don't match up to how most people see us. I may be feeling shy, but others might see it as standoffish. I might be feeling tired, but others see me as bitchy. I might be in a hurry, but others see me not making eye contact or smiling. So, I've been thinking about intentionally trying to look friendlier by consciously smiling more.
I met a man this summer who told me I need to not think about the past or the future-just the present. I have heard of this before, and understand what is meant, but I find it hard to espouse it. For me, I take lessons learned from the past, and anticipation of future events to help make the present even better! I guess what I'll try to do is apply the idea in its pure sense...to try not and let any negativity from the past colour my present, and to be more present-not always working for the future.
I really want to decrease the amount of anxiety I experience. I believe less anxiety would improve the quality of my life. No real advice or counsel received on this issue.
Be more present.
To be honest and clear with myself and others. This is piece of wisdom a friend shared recently, and I took it to hear. Although it can feel more complicated to extricate these kinds of feelings of honesty, especially if you are concerned with other peoples feelings. Truly, it makes life so much simpler and more straightforward. Next year, I would like to be honest, with care and consideration for others. No need to spare them the truth, everyone deserves the truth, but it's okay to say it in terms that feel less sharp too.
I would like to worry less and accept that things aren't perfect. Including me, I'll aim at doing things well but not perfectly. The advice could have been that I am not able to make someone happy. Everybody is responsible for their own happiness..
I would like to improve myself and my life next year by spending less time on nagging/whining/bitching/raging about things or situations that don't even deserve the attention. I often find myself winding myself up into a rage on stuff like that and I think it's wasted energy but I just can't help myself. I didn't receive counsel per se but I saw how my mom is like that just 10 times worse. For my sake and the sake of my man, I don't want to become like this when I'm older as it gives her and my dad a hard time, so I really want to try and improve that about me.
The most impactful advice I have received over this past year has been about putting intention out to the universe. I have had this counsel before, but have not paid a lot of attention. As I am now fully retired and awaiting news of possible surgery, I need to be more "intentional" and see what happens. I am feeling less and less in control, and at the same time, people and things are opening up to me in ways that are unexpected. My desire for connection is increasing. Maybe due to my health concerns, my age, my later life status...all unclear. But having the intention to be more "out there" and more "in the moment" is probably the best counsel I could have received at this point in my life.
I want to maintain fitness and a healthy weight. My advice is to take it one day at a time; Make short term goals.
Worry less, risk more, do more! Be less sedentary!
Love myself and be less self- critical. Brood less. Embrace my artistic self. Love my husband more and be more compassionate and attentive to him - he is so good to me.. Attend to how physical activity makes me more emotionally happy! Kindness returns like a boomerang - be kind more often. Focus on finishing projects before starting new ones. Be happy and the rest will follow.
I want to dissolve my proscrastination. I want to have the house in clean order. I want to have a new sequence in my life and live it passionately.
Self: a daily routine that includes healthy activities and meditation, and more frequent social activities. My life: A new office, start marketing my business, and better organized. The greatest advice: On the eve of the new school year, or a new job, or the new year, my dad would call and give me "the clean slate" talk. He reminded me that I had a clean slate, a chance for a fresh start, and to do my best.
Would like to do better on my work/life balance. Life is supposed to get easier to manage post-residency. Have to keep remembering that mantra.
Maybe I am just getting old, but "yolo" comes to mind. Not because it's trendy (if anything it's time as a trend has passed), but because it's true. However, I do not take "yolo" as a reason to be reckless, but to just continue being thoughtful and long-term in my decisions. Perhaps I actually take it as a reason to be conservative with money, time and energy, which may be the opposite of how others interpret this phrase (or at least use it to justify "stupid" actions.) On the other hand, I spend a great deal of time thinking about the future. More than most people, I would guess. I need to remember to be happy in the moment. That sounds cheesy, though.
This past year has been a growth and discovery year for myself - I have become quiet and thoughtful in my words I try to be patient have an open heart and an open mind. I continue to explore how my body thrives on exercise and my mind thrives on reading and music. This year I want to seek and find a relationship that is in it's truest form the partnership that I have always wanted. I feel I am ready again after almost 4 years of being single to explore sharing a life again...I spent the last year working with a counselor to discover the things about myself that I have denied or put aside or hidden because I was told to - I realized that if I don't speak up for what I believe or what I need or especially what I desire then I will never have these things - I made it happen with my career and am proud of the work I do and the relationships I am creating , my volunteer work challenges me and brings me joy when we are successful - but I am not entirely sure I am finding the joy in it any longer...so perhaps time to seek a new journey? I want to be the best that I can be in all aspects of my life and continue to move forward and meet people that make me and my life richer - This I say out loud and hope to make it so!
I would like to embrace fun and joy more, learn to relax and let things unfold. Have psoas muscle release. Trust, trust, trust that everything is working out. I'd like to laugh more and feel more ease and flow re: my career, money, my relationships.
I would like to be a kinder, more optimistic person. This year's Cinderella movie showcased kindness as a super power, and that is what I now aspire to. I will push myself to make kind choices.
I want to find the spot where I take one too many drinks and stop before it. I want to stop having a torrid love affair with alcohol. I want to be sober more days a week than I am drunk. Advice or counsel? Find more positive ways to relax and have fun that don't take place in a bar.
I have really got to lose weight. Serious weight. I have been dinking around and excusing myself and not truly worked on this for years and years. Now I’m almost right back where I started (over 183) and this simply cannot continue.
Your body deserves attention. Being active and feeling healthy will reward your emotional and spirtual health as well. It's all for to be in balance. And only you control what goes on your body and your actions as a result. Don't do something you'll regret.
It would be good if I could develop a daily meditation practice. It would help me not to get so ruffled by challenges.
I want to work on establishing boundaries. This is why I don't ask for what I want or need. This is why I hesitate to share my emotions and story. This is a foundation in life that needs to be created.
I have no freaking idea. I just got this new job, and it's all well and good as jobs go, but I am locked into a course of action for at least a year, now, as a result of that, and any grand plans I may have to run away and join the circus (or whatever) are going to have to wait. Which is its own disappointment.
I wish I could accept what is, and not try to change what would do more harm to change than leave alone. I also wish I could focus my energies more productively, and not waste so much time on Facebook, games, etc. Though maybe that's not a battle worth fighting.
By reading all the books I brought with me to Jerusalem this year. Aside from the wisdom, knowledge and joy I will receive, doing so will mean I've learned to relax enough to read much more than I seem to be able to. As for advice, my research reveals that in many cases ADHD and anxiety are correlated. Managing the anxiety of staying put with a good book in my hands - and challenging myself to do so - will be my secret weapon and self advice to managing my self-diagnosed adult ADHD.
Look for a romantic relationship where I (and my partner) can communicate my every thought and emotion while it is still without the slightest hint of jealousy, and my partner and I still accept each other as is.
I am just treading water trying to keep my spouse with dementia at home, I would like to find a way to incorporate some of the activities that give me joy in my life into my routine, I would like to be more accepting of my "new reality" Advice that is guiding me is ask for help so I can take care of me.
This upcoming year I would like to be more focused. Making the most of every opportunity and the most of the time. There might've been unspoken counsel. I just feel bad when I know I've wasted the day.
Everything. Especially in being me. There was an advice - never stop growing, cause you are not alone. I'm not. I have the Counselor and Comforter always with and within me. I have my dear family in Christ. I have everything I need. I also encounter times of frustration and despair..but Love always overcomes. Never flees, always overcomes!
Lose weight! Exercise more! Stop wasting time hating ex! Be better mother. Everything the same for my entire life essentially. How about - eat more real food; more move; forgive more; love more?
Same as last year- think before I speak. The the other from Mae Green- focus on art and writing. Of course there are my bees and gardening- pleasure time and that okay.
Keep working on the things that need to be improved and don't give up if it gets hard. Be my own Ninja Warrior and push for what I know I need to do. Also, take time to listen, to be patient and to not always feel my answer is the right or only answer!
I would like to be more content with the choices I have made and the results of those choices. I would like to be okay with not improving. Maybe I am okay as I am? Instead of constantly expecting things to get better, maybe we should be focusing on sustainability or appreciating participation, even partial participation -- why do we value improvement of highly? Instead, perhaps, we should celebrate what is, instead of always expecting the future to be better. Yes, I learn and grow, but I also age and forget and become less able in some ways. And that's NOT A BAD THING! When we seek and focus on continual improvement, aging is seen as a degradation, instead of as a beautiful culmination of life, loss, experience, and the inevitable battering that time wreaks upon our bodies, souls, and minds. And while yes, we could reframe the weathering of a tree into driftwood as an improvement, perhaps we should focus on the inevitable reshaping of ourselves and our lives, neither good nor bad. Will things better next year? While I be an improved version of me? Why should I expect that I should be or want to be "improved"? Instead, my goal is to really embrace the understanding that this 7th question is an absurd one, that assumes a positionality that I think is unhealthy and un-wise. Next year, instead, perhaps, I will more fully grasp and appreciate the ways that my life changes and how those changes reshape me and those I love in multiple and unpredictable ways. I hope to be content with sinking into the heart beat of our world and the understanding that on a large scale, there is really no improvement, no end, nothing to gain or lose, we just are, in this one moment. Breathe and be at peace...
I want to do a better job of using my time at home productively. I'm hoping to clean and do laundry more regularly, a little at a time, instead of waiting until it's gotten unmanageable and needing a huge block of time to fix it. I want to keep my creative projects moving forward--my novel, my RenFaire costume, etc.--instead of getting started and setting them aside. I want to take better care of my plants and my teeth.
I want to live more connected to people. I am a sexual abuse survivor and intimacy always scared me. I want closer more intimate relationships. I have been listening to al anon speakers and their way to transform his/her life. I think I am going to find me a home group so I can do the work needed to achieve the intimacy I crave.
"Embrace your darkness along with your light." No one is perfect. Everyone has a "dark side". Whether it's that they're jealous, or proud, or whatever the case may be, everyone has a trait that isn't always nice. But, everyone also has good traits. I believe everyone has the capability for good, and although not always shown, it's there. If you don't embrace both your good side and your bad side, you'll never know your potential.
Practicing being in alignment is the only true job I have. Being happy regardless of circumstances. Not letting conditions dictate how I feel but having positive emotions dictate the conditions that occur!
I would like to continue to listen to what I need- whether it is at work, in my relationships, physically and emotionally. To not only to listen to what I need, but be able to act on that accirdingly. Pay attention, you know what you need. You know what makes you happy and fulfilled.
I'd like to quit wasting so much energy regretting my inability to maintain friendships with people who were never very nice friends. But since I've never been good at making friends that means I've got to be ok with being profoundly lonely.
Have more patience and work on my "quick trigger" reactions. Practice "mindfulness."
I appreciate my ex for showing me more of what I want in a relationship. I hope that next year, I will either be in a successful relationship, or not in anything at all. The grey zone that I had with my ex guided me in the right direction by showing me that is NOT what I want! My very wise friend said that he (my ex)'s puzzle piece may have fit on one side, but I'm looking for the puzzle piece that fits me on all sides. So smart!
Trust your gut! "Blessed are those who believe without having to see."
Oddly enough, it came from a student, whom I'd had before, in response to the question, "How can I help you be successful in this course?": "Just keep being you, and it will all work out fine." "Who I am" is someone who keeps trying and learning, who does not give up, who chips away at my goals even when the task seems overwhelming, and who tries to keep my relationships healthy through frequent contact. Letting grandiose goals and whether I achieve them define me can actually be detrimental - if I don't completely achieve, then I see the failure. If I just keep striving, I see the progress. I'll just keep being me, and it will all work out.
Just ride the wave. You're happy. You don't need to know what's next.
Laugh more. Put myself first. Work less hours. Go to the pool more often. Meditate. Be silly.
I'd like to get into the habit of turning up 10 minutes early to things. I used to be more punctual than I am. I can use that extra time to talk to people, watch the world go by, be mindful or read. I don't like lateness in others. I find it rude. So I shouldn't do it myself. I need to take note of how long it takes me to get ready.
I am making a huge effort to spread positivity and change my negative outlook into a positive one. I want to stop gossiping and start becoming a force of happiness in people's lives. I want to complain less, and do more. I want to live more sustainably, and eat better meals, I want to get closer to family. I want to stop lying about things that don't matter and start being my honest, genuine self. I want to change myself into my happiest self, so that I can spread that joy to other people.
Yes, please don't procrastinate. You are perfect just as you are. be gentle. spend more time with you son.
I would like to get fitter and as always, I'd like to be more disciplined. I think I've had all the advice I need on these issues, I'm just not that good at applying it!
I would like to be more laser-focused in how I use both my creative and vocational energy and expertise. I have a lot to do. Lots of good counsel to help guide me. The most important: get enough sleep (7.5-8 hours), keep on Paleo diet, 9,000 steps minimally each day, plan and prioritize, eyes on the prize, do what brings me joy.
Relating back to Day 2, I need to take care of myself and my body. I don't feel fit, and that effects everything. I want to get back to a fitness routine so I can get back to the physical and mental stability i had as recently as 2011. I want to remind myself of how good I felt, how I was able to complete more, feel good and even find more time to relax.
I want to explore both new places but also lesser known parts of myself. With a BA and a major education under my belt, I want to use this time to adventure and learn, to meet new people, and to get out of my comfort zone. It's important to me that I continue to grow and reflect on my life, especially at such a major milestone. I hope my anxiety stays at bay, I hope that I improve my application skills when I apply to med school, and I hope I am successful in that which I set my mind to. I don't think there's been any one particular piece of advice, but just the assurance from my family and friends that the world is my oyster and it's really time I live in it.
Today is the first day of the rest of your life. I need to figure out how to get the most out of retirement - planning day trips (and longer ones) and set up daily and weekly routines.
I would like to be a better eved Hashem.
I want to befriend my body. My body has much to tell me and I haven't been listening. With compassion, I've been afraid of what my body knows from my experience of sexual violation as a child. Yet sometimes it interrupts anyway with fear-filled sensations and painful emotions. Over time, I have learned to be present with these feelings when they arise. Yoga has been a path for reconnecting with my body's sensations and related emotions, and a source of healing them with awareness, presence, compassion. As I've gone deeper into my practice, I am more open to movement as well as stillness. What could guide me? When I first met her, my Future Self insisted that I walk with her to have a conversation, instead of sitting down, as was the instruction in the guided meditation. I interpret this as wisdom from my Future self to be in physical motion. Befriending my body at this point in my journey means listening to how my body wants to move, enjoys moving and finds healing in movement.
I just want to keep refining. I think I'm on the right path. Just have to keep up making small changes to get it all together. I am still competing with different 'wants' in my life and finding the balance will be important. Adventure v Having a good settlement... ha if that makes sense. Hmm I'm watching football right now and a Nike ad came on with the Just Do It slogan. I think that is important to not get stuck somewhere and... JUST DO IT.
I want to improve myself to do healthy things with my body. Excersise, eating healthy, trust my body and respect it.
Meditation and yoga. Meditation and yoga. Meditation and yoga. This year, I really mean it!
I would like to have a healthy happy loving relationship with a man, without losing any of my own sense of self. I would like to better balance work and life. Social exercise, sleep, practice etc. Have more social intelligence.
Get a good job that is exciting, interesting, flexible, and intellectually engaging. Keep exercising an hour a day.
I read somewhere about accepting life as a process, rather than trying to hold it still to make sense of it. Not an uncommon piece of advice, but it s truth struck me anew.
My life is ok. I could tweak it a bit, but I am not complaining
I would like to become better at my job, and feel like I could handle it a little more easily. I heard from my rabbi, who was quoting Marianne Williamson, that you can either have your complaint or you could have the miracle, but you can't have both.
I would like to continue to lose weight, exercise sufficient to get my bowels working properly and some of the blubber gone, and I'd like to say NO to more people on any project that takes more than half a day
Don't hold so tightly to what was that you can't accept the present or imagine the future - but in that, don't be so immersed in the present and future that you forget the things of the past, either.
The Bible tells us to strive to live a life dedicated to G-d, holy and pure. Impossible for us, as we are all sinners, and yet we are told to get on the road to striving and He will complete the good work in you. My road leads to Kenya and to the children in the schools our mission supports. I would hope to return there next year as a resident Bible teacher and to live out the rest of my life as a living example of G-d's love for all of us. My vision is to travel with the mission groups and teach, not only in Kenya and Tanzania, but also in Yerushalayem at our outreach in the Old City.
I'd like to exercise more. And I'd like to either back off from conflictual conversations or feel better about engaging in them.
I so want to become more patient. I want to calm down. I want to overcome my anxiety. I want to lose five pounds and at the same time I want to love the body I have if it stays where it is. I want to get my affairs in order.
I received a wonderful piece of advice from my trainer, that even working towards my goal of a long healthy life is not important compared to spending time w/ my family in the here and now. I expect to continue to work on my weight and health, but not to continue to be such a perfectionist at work, and to not bring work home, so I can be here for my family more.
I would like to improve myself physically by healing my rotator cuffs. I would like to improve myself mentally by becoming better at throwing things away, getting rid of stuff and creating more harmony and beauty in my home and life. The advice or counsel that could guide me is to hire help. My plan this year is to get better help.
I would like to Konmari my entire house. I would like to clear all the clutter so that I have time to do the things I really want to do - cook from new recipes, involve myself in organizations, read for pleasure, create photos albums of my kids.
naturopathic Doctors. I am trying to reclaim my health from Big Food & the Pharmaceutical industries. I have eaten sugar, gluten and milk products my whole life. I am now trying to heal. I will continue to read and visit these doctors for inspiration & direction. Conversely, I have been deeply impressed by Naomi Klein & her book, This Changes Everything: Capitalism versus the Climate. I will continue to do whatever I can to keep fossil fuels in the ground.
I want more joy in my life.
I would spend more time with my family, walking on the beach, being close to natural water sources, play music, meditate, go hiking, camping, travel to new places, meet new people. Laugh, Dance, let my inner Art shine out. Balance between listening to the voice of my heart and the voice of my mind.
Leave the safe harbor. Live with a whole heart. Accept you are present, thankful and enough. Embrace this season of your life.
I would like to improve myself and become happier.
Work more towards staying true to me. Without apologizing or feeling guilty about it. Having a genuine voice with everything I choose to say. Be more active in volunteering finding ways to balance my life as mom wife and self. Figure out in small ways where I want to dedicate my time career/job wise. Piece of advice that helped and can help in the future... Choose make decisions that seem to be closest to following your heart. And then surrender to what is. To the people to what comes and manifests. In terms of moments, be in them, enjoy them cherish the moments you love but remember let go don't dwell, it's ok to recall memories but remember the present is what we truly have at hand. Feelings and emotions, allow yourself to feel them, only share with those who you feel most comfortable trustworthy and worthy of listening and reciprocate be a good listener supporter. But then let go of feelings and emotions and most importantly let go of the ego...you have to keep moving... Your voice, share what you really feel your heart needs to protect your true self, and learn to let go and roll off the things you can't change. Live, love, laugh, connect be.
Don't base your decisions on fear and constriction. Base them on love and openness. That is where creativity flows from.
"Don't take it personally." I was told this just yesterday. I've been told it my whole life. I would like to learn to let the small stuff slide off because really it is inconsequential. But yesterday, I was also told that it was my sensitive nature that makes me notice those who need to be noticed the most. I suppose what I really need is to learn how to really not let the unimportant stuff bug me so I can concentrate one the stuff that I really can change.
I would really like to be debt free! That means selling for real estate and cutting my spending. My goal is to flip a house when I am 30 and I need to start saving for that. I would also like to be able to afford to travel even more than I do now. To exotic places. I would also like to be able to control my anger and not let things stress me out so much. The advice that can guide me is "do something today that your future self will thank you for" it really resonates with me. Even for little things like empty the dishwasher, all the way to big things like prospecting clients.
Stay present. Have fun. Be kind. Keep my word. Do what I love, with those I love.
I want to do more of what makes me happy :). Piece of advice: think of what Neil Gaiman said. Make good art. Husband runs of with a politician? Make good art. Leg eaten by a mutated boa constrictor? Make good art. etc. So that's what I'm going to do. No matter what :)
Overeating doesn't make you feel good, neither emotionally nor physically. Being greedy for whatever the reason (emotional issues included) is not attractive, helpful, healthy, cheap or productive. This is my own advice that just never quite catches on with me...maybe this year?!
I want to be a more supportive partner. Most of the time is comes pretty easily, but the times it doesn't are the times she needs it most. I need to tamp down my emotions some so that I can be more respectful of hers.
I want to enjoy myself more often. I don't spend much time enjoying myself, and my therapist, Kelly, suggests that spending more time doing things I actually enjoy would improve my life. I want to not give up. I want to write. I need to write. I need to write more often, and submit things for publication. In the past year, I've had times where I felt like people definitely cared about me, and I'd like to remember those times and to remember those people, when I lose hope. I'd like to remember that, as Dr. Byrd always tells me, I am the hero of my own story. And I want to stop judging myself for not being some accomplished person who I am not, for not having done some things I have no done....I want to embrace who I am and be proud of the things I have managed to accomplish, because they have been difficult, and I have struggled to manage them, so they were not just small, meager feats.
The constant balance of diet, exercise and rest needs constant evaluation and retooling. Medical care availability may improve in the next year.
I'd like to be more physically active and provide more learning experiences for myself and my family.
Connect more deeply with myself and others, through meditation and active listening.
Be more open about how I'm feeling or what I'm thinking. Advice that I try to follow is 'be in the present'
I'd like to spend more time and form deeper connections with the people I care about. I'd live to build my programming skills and knowledge. I'd like to start riding my bike more and getting regular exercise. I'd like to continue to do group and individual therapy to help me confront my issues and accept what has happened in my life. Advice from my therapist and group therapist has helped me immensely this year and continues to guide my goals.
I would like to be less negative and more positive. I am learning to surround myself with positive people who make me feel good about me. Id like to take that further and be one of those positive peoples.
I want to procrastinate less this year. I also want to exercise more, eat better, and get more sleep.
I would like to be able to improve myself through less clutter in my life, and more organization, and more time for me and my kids and my husband, and, no joke, more money (I know we're not supposed to talk about it, but it would make everything a lot easier.) Less anxiety. I think being able to manage the anxiety would help a lot. I think the "oxygen mask" advice and counsel that I've received in the past year is helpful.
I would like to become a better person improving my relationships with others being more excepting of others and developing a friendship with a girl woman that I can call my best friend pat has given me guidance and pointed out to me that there's times I don't truly accept others and instead of showing compassion I go to the negative example of the guy at work who had the frontal lobe injury meditating three times a week for at least five minutes thinking on the positive not going to Reckley to the negative and meanness.my observations are that that's how I would like to be the kind of person people want to be around because she makes them feel good about themselves
I would like to have a job that I enjoy. Mom tries to give me advice, but I can't relate to her on the subject of jobs and careers. If finding a job that I enjoy isn't possible without moving back to NY, then I want a job that I don't mind and like sometimes.
I would like to lose weight. I need to be content with what I am and what I lose - not beat myself up or give up because I indulge. I am not less because I weigh more than I would like. I am still valuable, I am not ugly or stupid.
I would like to be healthier, exercise more, eat better. I'd like to get back to my writing practice. health advice: every three minutes the NYTimes has exercise advice. Like walk for ten minutes three times a day instead of once for thirty minutes. Could work. ?? Yet here I sit at my desk. Truly the only person that can change my habits is me. That's advice I give to others who want to help their loved ones deal with bad habits. So it's on me. writing advice: also all over the internet. I wish I hadn't seen that "just do it" example of an answer to this question because now it's in my head -- though it is as good advice as any. I know what to do. Make it a habit. Regardless of travel, family, etc. Here's what I need to say to myself: Get the f*&% up in the morning. Don't waste time on FB or other internet distractions. Play fewer games. Make goals, keep them. Every day.
I would like to improve my communication such that I can ask my husband for positive change without having an unpleasant conversation. I would like to be able to stand up for myself when I think I am being put down or pushed around, I would like to be able to express my views and wishes without triggering negative feelings in others.
I would like to get better at time management. Working on the MIT concept - "most important things" and really just getting the stuff done that I want to get done and not getting so distracted all the time. One thing I've told myself continually in the past that I am working on now is getting more sleep. I also want to get better at working with my hands, doing some house work and building stuff now that we have a new house. Even if I fail I'll be happy if at least I try.
I would like to become financially independent and more physically fit. This will entail a great deal of work to obtain both goals, however, I think it's doable.
I would like to become a bit more social. I think that the events of the last couple of years have driven me inward and I'd like to expand my horizons a bit. Advice that I have received in the past was to get to know myself and get comfortable with myself before getting into any new relationships. I think that was great advice.
I would like to be more courageous . However.......... Now I also know that fear is the opposite of courage Also fear are thoughts that are anticipated in the "future" ( it hasn't happen yet...) By living in the "present" I may have appreciation for what so.........(no space for fear to exists)
I would like to be much less contentious; just go with the flow. I would like to give all the benefit of the doubt, as I was accustomed before. Good advice was to let things go, allowing others to fail/succeed on their own.
Same as always, pay my bills on time. Save $4000
If I had an answer to this, I think I'd be using it. Breathe more. Take time to enjoy my kids and don't get so impatient with them. Find more balance. Somehow.
Less procrastination so I can be "here" for work or play instead of always worried about what I have been putting off.
To slow down. To speak less, and more slowly, to wait before reacting, and to listen more and listen better.
On a superficial level, I hope to play guitar more, improve on the banjo, and read more books. I would like to remain up to date on current events, and worry less about superficial things, such as body image. I think I would like to run another marathon, and improve my time by 10 minutes (which would be 4:08). I also want to continue to seek out new opportunities to meet new people and experience new things.
I want to read THE FIVE LEVELS OF ATTACHMENT and apply the principles of the book in my life. My sponsor Kim has suggested that I read it.
I'd like to become more humble. Now that I'm starting what will hopefully be a new career in research and policy planning I want to express gratitude and enthusiasm for the opportunity. The best advise I've heard is to learn from my mistakes. But perhaps the way to apply that is to take a chance with speaking my mind and approaching people or networking. Some of these initiatives will work and some won't. I can learn from those that don't work and I can feel gratitude for those that do.
I want to reduce my time multi-tasking and not worry about the little things.
Follow your heart. Trust yourself.
By next year I would like to accept challenges as a way to keep growing and not feel like my To Do List is a burden I want to rejoice about having a life to live I shouldn't complain about the abundance of blessings I have been granted I want gratitude to feel like a natural state of being rather than constantly reminding myself to be thankful
I would like more peace in my mind, body, and spirit. Meditation might help.
"Don't take it personally"--even if someone means something to be personal, it isn't worth feeling bad about things. If I get constructive feedback, I need to take it and move on. I think the new job will help me learn to not take things personally--and I really do think that is key in growing professionally and advancing my career. We will see if I am right in time!
I would like to settle down with my partner at my place, and that requires getting rid of some of my stuff and a tolerance for adaptation. He once gave a piece of advice to two people who were about to do the same, and it is that the first year can be very difficult. Lots of patience and humor is needed!
I would like to be kinder, less judgmental and have less anger. Niki and Marybeth model joy and acceptance. I would like to better embody those traits
Take things bird by bird. Try not to get overwhelmed by the big picture, and just take things bit by bit.
I would like to continue to be grateful (listing daily gratitudes) and try to be more present for the moments in my life :)
I want to live more in the moment. Try to not think so much ahead and not live so much in my head. That will allow more of an appreciation of what is around me,
? I would like to find ways to reduce the speed of my life (I’m often rushing around to get everything I think necessary done) and make more space in my life—not always packing it so full of activities and to-do’s. Even though most of what I choose to do is a good in my life and I see my life as full of riches, I’m always grasping for MORE. I believe I’ve made some progress at this in the lst 6 months and hope to continue. My counsellor asked me to create a one sentence—or one-word mantra for myself—a self-affirmation that I could remember to say to myself whenever I feel like I am crowding myself or feeling anxious and negative about my day. The sentence I came up with is….”At my core I am a slow-moving, leisurely person wandering through the rich and varied spaciousness of my days.” Which I’ve reduced to the one word—Spaciousness.
I'd like to become better at networking, and not in a "let's talk so I can get a job out of you" way. I rarely go up to people and introduce myself in social situations. I tend to stick with the friends I already have, and most of those friends I have made the first move. The advice I have for myself actually comes from interviews with a lot of comedians I admire - use "yes, and" more. Stop shutting down/out people and just say yes to activities. You never know what will happen.
I'd like to be good.
I would like to keep focusing on acting with compassion. I would also like to get physically stronger.
I need to be more disciplined. I have the opportunities...I just need to make them work. Cut back on the wasteful time on social media when I should be writing.
I would like to be starting a more fulfilling and promising career in the military. I would like to have a better and more meaningful relationship with my daughter and be able to spend more time with her when I do get to see her. I would like to be a little less judgmental of people and a little more open to seeing others' perspectives on things and not just write them off as something I don't and won't agree with. And I would like to adjust my lifestyle to make it a little easier to stay in good shape and fitness and eat/drink somewhat healthier.
I'd like to build on the calm that I've fought hard to restore to my life. Now that I've got a stable base I'd like to feel ready to spread my wings a bit and try some new things, meet new people, to really feel present. I think the mindfulness guidance can guide me and I'd like to keep building on my practice with this.
I want to relax more and take less stuff personally. Most of what happens in the world, even in my world, isn't about me. I need to learn that.
be kinder, more patient, less judgmental... especially about myself. this past year saw the loss of one author that made a big impact on my life, Dr. Wayne Dyer. re-reading some of his thoughts reminded me that i am the director of my life; i shouldn't let others determine if i'm going to be in a bad mood or unhappy. and to let go of the ego.
I would like to grow my business to a point where it's sustaining. In addition I want to help every business I can in my area or around the globe. The best advice, sometimes you need to take a leap of faith!
Learning to scuba taught me that my life lacks challenges. It was the hardest thing I had attempted that I could remember. It was mental and physical, cold and unfamiliar, with people I didn't know, doing things I had never done. But the drive home afterwards in the sun was amazing, and the next handful of days were among the best I could remember. Challenges are hateful. But having passed through them, that's the good stuff. I can see why the motivational posters and Shia and all that crowd say 'just do it', because the payoff could be addictive.
Doubt myself less.
I would like to learn to deal with stress and worry and to be able to write at home. It would be wonderful if I could find love and affection but I don't see how, stuck as I am married to someone who is at best indifferent. Sex? Can't remember what it's like.
I want to follow the lead of my sixth sense more...wiser than my heart, unencumbered by desire. I want integrity to always win out over desire. the advice? if it walks like a duck, sounds like a duck and looks like a duck, it's a duck.
There are too many things to improve on to list. Health, wealth, being a good person and walking the path.
Doing what brings you joy connects you to source
I need to be more mindful. Lately my emotions have been out of control. My friend said to celebrate myself and I just pile on the work.
More mindful on a daily, moment-to-moment basis- remembering to prioritize "eulogy virtues" - hopefully facilitated by more time spent in formal mindfulness practice. Just started David Brooks' The Road To Character. Amazing so far, and will help inspire throughout the year I think.
I recently watched an interview with the former President of Uruguay. His advice not to give up on becoming the person I want to be really affected me. Middle class families get bogged down with the every day stuff, the busy-ness of looking good, raising "smart" kids, having a great home and taking interesting vacations. I'm running in that race. The race I never wanted to participate in. I have to find a way to let myself be OK with being different, teach my kids to see the benefit of being true to themselves without criticizing other people for choosing to do what they want. This is not easy.
I'd like to be more patient and understanding with the residents living in my community. I have to remember that while they may have many things to be unhappy about, any gruffness is not due to me personally, but their situation in life. I also want to listen better, especially to the ones I love. I know listening is hard and men are "fixers" - trying to solve problems. Sometimes just listening and being supportive emotionally is far more important.
Overcome/transcend/ the inner anxiety drive and fear. Really work on not worrying, not letting little things get to me, not worrying what others think, not diagnosing my condition whatever it is. Truly relax and see where God wants me. I feel a big part of this will be being positive and finding joy.
I want to live a healthier lifestyle. Rather than sitting and watching tv, I want to take the initiative to get out and do something. No-one said anything. But others live by example.
1. Lead with love 2. Live for yourself 3. Slow down I feel pretty good about myself and where my life is headed. I think the most important thing for me to do, is to not lose sight of my goals/happiness. I need to continue the work, growth, and beauty I have discovered within myself.
I would like to unequivocally stop smoking...again, and travel more.
I want to not settle for less than I deserve, career wise. I hope that next year, I'll have transferable skills to work in a different field if I am not already working in a different field. I hope to finally be satisfied with my job.
Having experienced a 3 month period of a loved one going through cancer treatment only to succumb 2 weeks after stopping treatment, a timely piece of sage advice came my way last week: With animals and people passing.... mourn. Then put your grief in a little box in the back of you brain and MOVE ON. Enjoy the memories but most of all, LIVE.
To be more optimistic. That is most likely I answered last year.
You can just say no. You can decline invitations without giving a reason. "No" is a complete sentence.
I would like to lose some weight and maybe even grow half an inch. I would also like to be focused on getting ready for college.
I just need to keep following my mantra. "Eff this, you're too awesome to deal with this crap." That is advice I gave myself, and I've been following it and lots of good things have come from it. I want to keep doing so, and not let myself fall back.
I hope to become better at casual conversation, and to stop freaking out about that and things sourrounding it quite so much.
I want to get in better shape and deal with my ankle pain more effectively.... I want to stay sharp and keep myself as healthy as I can be.... I want to get better with my computer to enjoy and be useful for shopping, bills,etc.... I have been told to savor the moments of retirement and don't let it pass me by....I intend to do that...
I want to focus more on developing and improving positive personal relationships at work and at home. I want to develop a more resilient patience with others, especially while driving. Relax, don't let the little things get me excited, don't let my emotions drive my behavior. No particular advice - follow Jesus' teachings in the New Testament - Golden Rule, love and serve others...
LOOSE WEIGHT!, take chances, and seize the opportunities. Get serious with my Arbonne business, need to get serious about my retirement plan and unemployment plant B
So often when I come to unexpected experiences, I enter into them with a tinge of fear - so my first unfamiliar experiences always have a flavor of anxiety to them. I don't expect to lose that - I would also want to be able to open up to the joy of the unexpected.
"A small change in your life can cause a ripple affect in all areas. " "motion is the potion" I plan to live a healthier lifestyle and to be more active socially and physically.
I would like to become more connected to people socially and to deepen my existing connections. The advice is Brene Brown via LZ: vulnerability is good.
Stay the course for love, courage and connection. come come again to my morning practices and movement ffor love, with love
I would like to get very serious and intentional about strength training this year. I just bought an ebook about strength training to improve Ur running.
I hope I can be more patient with people. But I know I also need to be more assertive but not abrasive. I have thought about finding a counselor I can talk to to help me build some better skills with being assertive while still having compassion for others. I hope I can be more thoughtful to others also. And show that I am a good friend to my friends. I can't remember any specific advice but my council to myself is to take the time to think about others and take the time to really listen to what they have to say. I hope this would guide me in how to respond to others. The other council would be to try to be honest with myself. This will help me be honest with others. If I can be honest, I will find it easier to be assertive respectfully.
I'd like to continue focusing more on the positive. I think I've made strides in the past year, but I have a ways to go. Patience and forbearance. Providing encouragement, helping to uplift, and keeping my mouth shut when critical thoughts worm their way into my consciousness.
I would like to be kinder and less judgemental. I want to enjoy all my students!
Stuck between a rock and a hard place and turning 69 on Monday. No clue. Happier marriage; good health, happier husband. Cleaner and nice looking apt (and I have the money and the stuff to do it). Healthy cats. See my daughter. Somehow contact my son - not sure. Mainly try to stay married with a modicum of happiness. He is not happy See shrink try for better ways to resolve issues. I don't know. It has to be better.
I want to get to the Y several times a week and start exercising again. I want to procrastinate less instead of waiting until the last moment. There's no particular advice that I've personally received but I think I need to make a plan instead of excuses.
I must stop procrastinating and put myself forward with volunteering. I have not become as involved as I had planned a year ago. I also need to move forward and forget the slights that I perceive have been directed at me. The HHD liturgy will be my guiding counsel.
Think before you commit. Don't be driven by past behavior patterns. Include myself in compassionate action. Chill. Be.
I would like to find the balance in remaining good at my job and growing in my career and being a good mom yo an infant. The advice I was given this year that really made me see my own potential was from my boss when we were discussing the potential for me to take over her position. She said, "Whatever you set your mind to do, you do and do so with excellence. You grow into challenges."
"The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper." -- W.B. Yeats In the coming year, I want to see the world as Thomas Merton saw, as Pope Francis sees. One way to keep me on course to see God in all beings is to continue monthly spiritual direction and daily centering prayer.
Take time to smell the roses. Go outside. Relax. Find a trigger to use that will remind me to go out into nature.
There are no particular words that stand out among the others. There has been so much encouragement from family and friends throughout this horrendous process, that it's impossible to narrow it down. I would like to be a better Jewish mother. That would be an improvement. I would like to be a more patient mother. That would be a tremendous improvement. And I would like to be more self-sufficient and confident. I know that will help me accomplish everything I need to pursue.
I'd like to see it all the way through. I tend to start off strong and slowly lessen my drive. I was told to always believe in myself because in life not everyone will.
I want to continue to exercise and try to be more kind and loving. This year I gained a deeper understanding of coexistence and interdependence and realized those are not choices one makes. They are with or without me. I prefer with me for a while longer!
I would like to be true to myself, use my intuition and trust myself. I will be less critical and more loving to myself as well as others. I can only really love others if I love myself and project that. Yes the guide is a book I read and my therapist and my husband Ted.
Lose weight. Walk more. Enjoy friends and family
I want to continue on the path I am on. More reflecting, more time to be with people one on one or be alone, more reflecting. I specifically want to either take up meditation in a more structured way, or yoga, or both.
I would like to be happier, less lonely and more fulfilled. My therapist's advice to guard my emotional boundaries is a good one.
Wow, so many areas I want to improve. My health, my weight, me efficacy as a therapist are the ones that come to mind immediately. I thought private practice was where I would be, but after talking to Everett, I'm not sure. Is private practice worth it? I've been making half-hearted attempts to lose weight, but still have a good 20 lbs to go. And, after exerting myself just cleaning my house I'm realizing how out of shape I am. So, to answer the question, how would I like to improve next year? 1 Lose 20 lbs 2 Feel confident in my therapeutic modality choices 3 Be exercising regularly
I would like to have become more confident, and to have finally made the move into a career that I enjoy rather than merely tolerate in order to pay my bills. I've watched videos where people have said that in order to find satisfaction in work you should go for something you love, rather than something you just put up with. I'd also like to have met someone and perhaps started a serious relationship. I said that last year... but this time I mean it!
I would like to get back on track in losing weight. I would like to find more time for bible study and bible reading. I would like to have time to join a gym and do some exercising. I know what I want to do and need to do but am bogged down by tasks before me. Currently I know I am working at least 60 hours a week and have others working about 10-15 hours a week as well in association with the mission (Nancy's Pantry Corner). Losing weight should give me more energy for more things, thus freeing up time for the others on the list above.
I would like to improve my tendency to not be compassionate during the mundane day-to-day conversations with my husband. I also would like to be able to calm myself before reacting when faced with my now more than 3 1/2 year olds moments of emotional demands. The counsel I received was from my mother's perspective about parenting now in comparison to when I was my daughter's age, that I, amongst other parents my age group are more hands-on than she was.
I would like to worry less about being turned down or being told "no." I'd like to take more risks, not in a dangerous sense, but in a personal sense. While I was doing research in Mexico this summer, and was reaching out to interviewees in Spanish (and quite nervous about the whole thing), I came across this Audre Lorde quote: "Next time, ask: what's the worst that will happen? Then push yourself a little farther than you dare." I would like to take small leaps of fearlessness- overcome my fear of embarrassment, my fear of being told "no." I hope I take risks and see what happens.
I would like to take a class, something like a language, literature, basic economics. Something to stir up my mind and get me thinking again. Im retired and my brain needs the stimulation of learning something new.
Spend less time worrying and working on the house & lawn & spend more time relaxing & doing things. I want to travel to some of the state parks & gorges this fall and spend time outdoors enjoying the scenery and not working so hard. Ellen is always giving me counsel on this.
I'm the next year I'd like to take time to just Be without pressure to perform or produce. One hour per day of freedom. And I'd like to actively nurture my friendships, by hosting more dinners and gatherings and initiating more get-togetherness. Connections: within and with my world. My council would be to keep it simple.
Be more aware, accepting and forgiving
I would like to continue on my journey of weight loss and getting to a healthier state both physically and mentally. Advice I received is good but much easier said than done- don't stress eat.
I aspire to becoming more comfortable with myself. Stripping away my dependencies and coping mechanisms that prevent me from seeing myself clearly, but more importantly being more gentle with myself, giving myself permission to be fallible and remain lovable.
I'm trying to be more open to new experiences and opportunities. I'm trying to make more friends in my classes. I would like to see myself being more comfortable with myself--my body, my values, my opinions, my personality. Sometimes, I worry too much what others think, and I would like to get away from that.
Best choice is no choice. Less stress in my life would be good. I can achieve this by continuing to delegate, to refrain from oversleeping, to try to eat and work at a level of 70% full as much as possible. I'd like to teach as much as work for Facing History.
How I want to improve my life in the next year... Loaded question. In the next year I will be going back to Europe for another three month trip but this time I'll be staying mostly in Barcelona. During that time I will be taking a 10 week Spanish class. Depending on finances and relationship status I may take my new Spanish skills and go to South America and see what I can do down there. I want to continue to eat well (room for improvement), exercise multiply times a week, and travel, love and learn! I need to say more in the present-be here now- but continue to be happy and motivated
I would like to spend more time learning about my trade. Specifically portrait photography. As well as practice my spanish speaking and knowledge about cigars and different alcohols for work purposes.
I'd like to spend more time writing and doing the things I enjoy - like sewing and baking. Now that I have made a good start, I want to keep that momentum going. I also want to remember that I can overcome those things from the past that held me back.
I will receive good luck this year. I will acquire the ability to reach people and help them with their own issues. I will be an inspiration to others, while helping people find their paths in life.
Loose a few more pounds and stay in shape. I have to work hard at fighting depression and staying positive. One shouldn't wish your life away....but I am so ready to move onto the next chapter. I have to remember to not make life decisions when I'm frustrated, mad or upset about something. Patience....always patience.
Binging is OK but not all the time. Yoga. Fasting. Water. Writing. Finance.
I want to spend less time improving and more time accepting. In doing that I feel I will become more confident and happier and that would be a wonderful improvement.
You are the creator of your karma. The more good you do, the more comes your way. The right risk in the right direction can undo the casting & lock on your dreams. Believe in the power of manifestation. Your angels will guide & protect you.
"Prayer works. It just depends on what you pray for." For this next year, I am praying for the strength to keep from despairing about ever earning my living by writing fiction. I am praying for hope that lives eternally in my breast. And I'm also praying for insight into the good I am doing in the world by being a teacher, and for my own ability to derive emotional sustenance from that.
I would like to improve myself/life by... 1) Making it a priority to attend yoga classes. 2) Getting out a bit more....with friends and co-workers. 3) Making it more of a priority to find Shabbos dinners to meet more Jewish people and meet a Jewish guy. 4) Eating more vegetables with every lunch and dinner. I received some advice from friends about doing more of what I love to meet like minded people. I plan on using that advice to help with some of the few things listed above.
I would like to be more organized. Do a better job of time management. Waste less time on the computer.
I need to work on giving my opinion too freely and becoming a better listener. I've gotten myself into trouble with this with E and B and really beat myself up about it. If I'd listen more and choose my words more carefully next year I will consider that an improvement.
I would like to love more and worry less. To trust myself more with my intuition. This will help all my relationships. Advice I've received is to share more with others. I would like to do that in the coming year specifically with family planning,
Do more creative projects, feel more artful. José Luís said that my writing was "worth people reading" and asked me if I knew it. My creativity is worthy. I have worthy and creative thoughts to share with the world. It is worth creating my art and sharing it, and it makes me feel amazing.
I would like to continue to focus on making better choices and be in my own classroom at the start of the next school year. I want to continue on a path of positive, I think I'm finally going to understand and get what I want.
To live in the present. remain positive, continue to appreciate the little things in life most important: family, friends, the kindness of strangers when they realize I have cancer, the unconditional love from my best friend Henri. There is no material things that can replace them.
The most important thing for me is deepening my meditation practice and practicing mindfulness in the ordinary moments of my life. Recently my meditation practice has come to incorporate experiences and buddhist philosophies around universal awareness. In my practice I have focused on using silence, stillness and spaciousness as bridges to experiencing universal awareness. This awareness of awareness brings a sense of equanimity and peace, and it generates feelings of warm heartedness and loving kindness. It also allows the small issues that occupy the chatter and problems of the mind to fall away, as nothing but static. I would like to continue learning about this dimension of buddhist practice and deepen my experience of it.
The event is neutral- how I respond is up to me. If I stand in the future, there are endless possibilities.
i would like to worry less. when i start to feel worry (most always about things i cannot control, anyway) i would like to remind myself that worrying is just fruitless, breath deeply and move on in a constructive way.
I would love to not be so judgmental of everyone around me. What point is there in this judgment and who am I to judge? I am just getting myself all wrapped in a tizzy as they blissfully go about their day. It's clearly a mask to my own insecurities. I'm projecting my ideal of perfection and social acceptance on to them. Who cares what they are doing, wearing, saying, especially if it's not hurting me?
I need to learn to stop talking over my husband. I just do it when I'm excited, but it really irritates him. I'm not sure I can stop without stifling too much of myself. I hope I can figure out how to resolve this so we're both happy. At this point I'm not sure I can. Update 3 days after I wrote the above paragraph: Haha, and a few days later he discovers he interrupts me all the time. He said he's trying to stop doing that now. I told him I hope he fails miserably. Because it doesn't bother me when we talk at the same time, and if he realizes it's incredibly hard to stop, and that he doesn't mean anything bad by it when he does it (so therefore I don't either), then maybe he'll stop insisting that I stop doing it.
Sustainable guest lectures Open up to the sadness and tears Today: teach spirituality at a different level
Well obviously easier said than done but I have a few ways I'd like to improve my life. I want to stop comparing myself to others. Also I feel like I beg for compliments and that is a bad quality to have. I would like to not need to rely on others compliments to make myself feel better. I would like to just feel good on my own.
Expand my social network, feel more connected
I want to be less negative, compare less with others, find more truth, love more richly and deeply, contribute more good to the world.
I want to let go of the past. It's been a struggle to do so, because these past mistakes have formed into insecurities. These insecurities hinder me from feeling reassured, and instead I have to ask for constant reassurance that I'm okay or I'm a good friend, etc. I also want to be okay with making mistakes. My former boss told me that I should never become my mistakes, that even if it's totally not okay to make them, it's human nature to commit them and to accept that truth.
I'd like to work more on embracing the vulnerability of speaking out. Too often this year I've stayed silent and kind of listened attentively while people said things that I disagreed with, because I didn't want to start conflict. I think a lot of that was due to me navigating life as an entry-level employee, but I'm going to be in this state of life for a while. I need to learn how to speak up for myself and my ideas, and live with a little discomfort. After all, if I want to be an activist, being comfortable all the time isn't a good thing.
Try to temper my speech and not be so quick to be clever. Think things through more thoroughly. The advice? Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind????
I would like to continue my goal of not lurking around men and of viewing being single and childless as a viable, awesome, thrilling, and totally satisfying choice. And I want to use the time and energy it affords me to be a better and more disciplined writer, and to be more socially active, play more music, and develop my meditation practice. I have a rich and full and blessed life which I must not cheapen or sabotage with efforts to entice and win over and accommodate to men who don't value or nourish or satisfy me. "Go well and value yourself" is something Liz wrote to me several years before she died, but the advice resurfaced as I looked back over our correspondence late last year after she died. I pledge to Go well and value myself.
I want to be more vulnerable, and to try things where I don't know if I'll succeed.
I am seriously working on my humility. It is difficult. I am too sure of myself and need to remember that I am superior to no one.
I'd like to become more active (and proactive). As for meaningful advice, it all boils down to the old Nike line.... Just Do It!
I'd like to read more. Period. A law school colleague of mine once shared the story of her grandfather who had an impressive library. His practice and motto was as follows: try to read four pages a day.
Putting even $20 a week into a savings or investment plan. I am doing it already but want to start making my money work for me. I've been broke most of my life, living paycheck to paycheck, but making this investment in my retirement is worth trading a few indulgences for. They day after I asked a friend about investing, I received a call from my bank's financial planner saying they saw my small savings and had ideas on how to grow it even larger. Feeling lucky!
I would like to reduce my stress, I would like tone part of a Parkinsons support group to know how to be a better caregiver
I would like to do more for my community in the future. To have a greater impact on the world. To do good that is further reaching than my immediate circle.
The main thing that I would like to do is learn how to separate, again, from my mother. I lived away from her for almost 20 years, and came "home" when my life fell apart in 2001. Since then I have moved away, had things fall apart again, and came "home" again. I need to gain the strength to stand on my own again.
I'm not really sure. I'm pretty happy as I am. I think what would improve my happiness is having a loving partner. I guess, I'm not really looking to improve myself but there are things that I want to do that would improve myself Like I want to travel alone to Europe. I think I would become much more independent and more confident. I also want to take up burlesque, pole dancing and painting. I think this would make me a bit more interesting, increase my creative ability, improve my fitness and confidence... I also would like to lose a tiny amount of weight, I think I'd feel happier with my appearance and probably feel much healthier. I haven't been eating that well in the past, so upping the fruit and veg is a good thing. A piece of advice that would guide me? For gaining a partner, I guess that would be, make myself happy first - a partner isn't there to make me happy, a partner is the icing on the cake. Happy people are attractive. In terms of travel, I guess that would be, just going to places that aren't too far out of my comfort zone and learn a bit of the local language.
I would like to treat my family and myself better. I want to live in the moment, conscious of my being, and my choices. I want to be love always. I am reminded that life is too precious to live careless and effortlessly. We must thrive with love and positive intention.
Dr. Copeland advised me to do more of the things that bring pleasure… I would like to: have people over for dinner more frequently, play bridge with Tina & Joe, travel without fearing for my health, as examples.
Over the next year it is important to me that I continue my OA recovery. While there isn't one piece of advice, I would say there are many. Most important is that this addiction will kill me and I need to choose everyday to be abstinent and work the program. I will say that going into this HHD I haven't been willing to do the work. However, I am commuting myself tonight to wake up tomorrow recommitted to this program.
Trust your gut....don't force the process...and let the outcome present itself. Be the best you can possibly be for yourself. Nor for anyone else. Set boundaries in all of the relationships in your life and stick to them.
I would love to be better at budgeting my time. I would also like to find more joy (read as have moments that are a 10) in each day. I will be able to savor those moments and see more of them in each and every day, because I deserve them. Jim Rohn said that we are to realize that no matter how good the "Seed" that we sow some of it will land on stoney ground and some the "Birds" will get. If I just keep sowing I will succeed.
I would like to loose my anger and exchange it for serenity. I would like to be able to forgive those who have hurt me and change hate for benevolence. It is necessary to forgive and ask forgiveness.
I want to be more financially stable. I've read that women tend to put themselves last and end up not taking care of themselves financially. I'm about to turn 40 in two years, I want to be able to say that I can take care of myself and a kid on my own. I'm looking into a financial advisor right now. Next year, I want to both set and achieve some financial goals in the process.
I personally just want to be more happier than i was in the pervious of years. The best advice i got is just to simply be myself and do the things that I love to do, as well as trying new things.
I would like to solidify my knowledge and the reality of my heritage. I would like to learn the lashon kadosh. I would like to progress significantly in my practice and understanding of my emunah. I would like to learn the Hebrew prayers. I would like to serve my Elohim more and better than I am.
I would like to transform any lingering anger into compassion. This comes from a friend's comment that I seemed angry. Improve my life: nice living situation and some financial blessings. What am I guided by? To let go and let God/the universe... let it flow. Be responsible for my energy. Attract/be in light and healing love. Repeat Jennifer McClean's meditation. Namaste.
I want to be more healthy. I want to beat these eating disorder that I have. I'm fed up of having it take over my life and it's time I took stand and show it that I'm in charge round here. Food doesn't fill a foid!!!!
-Improve myself by becoming a better public speaker and doing it more -Guidance I received by mom and my pastor at church: Let it Go !
Think like a man and let things go. Stop the self judgement and torture. Live in the moment !!!!!!!!!
My life and I need order and organization. I have to have order and have things de-cluttered to be able to create. . I've given myself until October 31st to get that done. As to advice - No. I can't recall asking anyone for advice this year and I do not acknowledge or accept unsolicited advice. Giving unsolicited advice is as arrogant, to me, as someone thinking they know what God wants.
Face up to your demons, they're only as strong as you allow them to be, so seal help when you know it is needed
I want to get fit, do more in acting, cosplay, spend more time with my daughter and not think what are we going to do today during the school holidays.
I think I can work on my facial expressions. I know I don't have a "poker face" and that it is very clear to others if I am in a good or a bad mood. I'd like to elevate my awareness of my face and what it conveys and to temper it somewhat. This will be especially helpful at work where I can be seen as "mean" or "not happy." It will also help with my husband. The hardest part about trying to make this change is that it is not easy to remain conscience of my expressions.
I would like to further my mindfulness practice to observe and let go to continue to accept by understanding without judgement all while i offer my smile to myself and those around me A smile is the one curve that straightens everything else out
I want to stop my codependent ways, especially at work.
I would like to find more time for exercise, and this will involve negotiations with my spouse. I am a full time working mom, and my spouse also works full time. He has a much easier time than I do carving out time on the weekends or when not working to exercise, and to contribute to causes that he enjoys. He also regularly takes extra hours at work in the evenings, etc, while I am focusing on evening activities with kids. I spend so much time supporting my husband and thinking about my kids schedules that I often find myself unsure about the causes and the exercise that would be most meaningful and enjoyable for me. As a result I find little time to do so and I feel unhealthy and out of shape. So this year I would like to be more structured and deliberate about my own schedule with my husband so that I do not feel like the default parent and so that I have time for myself.
I must learn to let what I think other people want from me go! I want to lift this cloud of depression and once more enjoy life. It's been forever since I was happy and content with my life - if ever. I wish I could find someone or something to guide me!
I want get out from under the Voice that tells me I'm not worthy of love. I've been going to lots of weddings lately, and I have several more to go this year. Often I'm the only single person there and it's really taking a toll on my self-esteem. Rather than thinking "I'm a loser if I don't have a boyfriend" I'd like to find ways to focus on what I do have that makes me happy.
First, I must find my life again. At times I feel I am edging toward a new settling place, but the progress has been ragged and slow. It's been nearly a decade since I retired, yet I am still unsettled. Most everything I thought might be part of my life now isn't or isn't in the way I thought it would be, and I've felt the grief. I expressed it in this poem: TRYING HARDER Having finally faced that this time in her life was turning out far different than she had imagined: far from the dreams of a gaggle of wiggly, giggling grandchildren clamoring at Nana's knees for attention, delighting in her funny stories and silly antics but turning, too, serious eyes and ears to her truths, guidance and gentle admonitions they will treasure in memories of endearment they share with their own; far from packing up her small rolling suitcase and matching carry-on satchel, scuffed and bulging with those wrinkle-free combinations that can be turned into an entire three-week travel wardrobe with four scarves, a colorful wrap and a few pieces of costume jewelry to take you anywhere you go; far from the days lost in scraps of paper, glue and paint, from hours vanished in the puzzle of glass and grout, from time standing still in etching a design to become a print inked into an image perhaps worthy of a frame, from the expression of artistic visions, the energy of creating, the exquisite satisfaction of consummated expression; far from those leisurely days lived in momentary whims and impulses to pack a picnic for a day trip to the park or to spend the day at the mall puttering among the sale racks, picking up a few bargains then grabbing a Chinese lunch in the bustling food court, or taking in an afternoon movie with popcorn and a Coke; far from her expectations, she wept, slept the sleep of grief, then rose, resolved to try harder to love the life she had. ~~~~~~ So I want to look to this next year for more growth into my own sense of Self, affirm my "work" in writing and live daily with the quality of my next two decades in mind. That means I have to get moving again.
I need to improve my time-management skills. I used to be good at this. Not so long ago, I was capable of accomplishing many projects at once, of many different types. Now I seem to be best at spinning my wheels. I like to blame the internet, but that's not very useful. Even if true, I need to have the self-discipline to beat it so I can achieve my goals.
I am opening myself to to all the potential that is available to me. I will expand my yoga practice, teaching and career by first believing absolutely in my ability to do so and then taking concrete steps. I did a vision board on a yoga retreat and realized how important having my own space is to me. I later had a couple of readings that were very encouraging about moving away from the physically, emotionally, and spiritually limiting place that I live in now. Finding my own home, my own space away from Randy is my first priority. I will do this in the next several months.
My counselor, Oscar, has been telling me that teaching is a level below my potential in intellect and career. He says teachers score 18 ACT and have an IQ of about 90. I scored a 26 ACT and have probably a 110 IQ although I have not taken an actual IQ test. (Am going to do the "draw a person" test this week next time I meet with Oscar, which will measure my IQ go figure.) I don't know if I should be determining my career path based on IQ, but I am convinced that teaching is not exactly what I want to do. Oscar suggested grad school last weeek, and for the first time I am actually considering it. A masters in counseling at Akron U sounds intriguing. Narrative therapy, art therapy, counseling, psychology, whatever. Maybe even music. Also like mentioned in other Q's this year... I want to be more honest. Not be afraid of being "myself" which is a cop-out thing to say but it's the best way to put it. I feel calmer, less anxious and panicky and more peaceful/happy when I am not holding anything back that really wants to be forward. I also don't want to hold grudges, or let negative feelies bubble. It's uncomfy.
"Can you keep your soul in its body, hold fast to the one, and so learn to be whole?" Can you center your energy, be soft, tender, and so learn to be a baby? Can you keep the deep water still and clear so that it reflects without blurring? Can you love people and run things, and do so by not doing?...To bear and not to own; to act and not lay claim; to do the work and let it go; for just letting it go is what makes it easy" Tao Te Ching, translated by Ursula K Le Guin.
Well I would always like to be a little wiser and a little kinder. I would like to put my money where my mouth is and do more to make this a better and kinder world.
Find a purpose to my day-to-day life. Instinctively, this means a job I enjoy, but I recognise that it might be something else. The way to do it? Network!
I would like to continue to not hurt myself and others when I am hurt. I've heard a couple of times over the years, "Hurt people hurt." I regret and am ashamed of the loss of control I have when I feel really vulnerable and am scared that I am not good enough. Brene Brown's adage, "You are enough" has been powerful for me. Her work speaks so much for me and other people who feel throughout the day that they are constantly falling short. I would also like to manage my money better. This month I couldn't even make my car payment. I have no savings whatsoever and I'm 48. I'd also like to have a lower cholesterol level next year and a decreased blood sugar number. I want to hurt myself less.
Be calm. Enjoy the journey and trust that it will work out and be ok. Be the kind of person you want to be. And it if it is not better at least have good experiences.
I would like to be more present in my life. Stop trying to survive so much, and actually try to live. I've probably been told to slow down many times, and perhaps that is the best advice I never listen to. Ok, that and "you should quit smoking."
I would like to become more active physically and lose some weight. Not like 60 lbs or anything, but 10 would be a good start! I would like to start eating healthier too - much less sugar and more whole foods. When I have done this in the past it has really improved everything in my life. I have gotten lazy!
I would like to be calmer. I have been working on this a lot this year--meditating, cancelling things that aren't necessary--but I know I have a long way to go. Lean out! And, #jomo (joy of missing out). I bought the perfect chair for reading and relaxing, and I want to spend more time in it.
I would like to lighten up and have fun with my art. It is a gift and a joy to be able to pursue painting and I want to approach it with that attitude. Louise CK said that the most important thing is to be useful to others, doing his comedy is the fun part. I've worked hard to create a life where there is time and space for art; balancing other work, family and friends is a challenge. I hope that I can make my limited art time a joyful release, rather than a grimly guarded separation. With that, to integrate it into all aspects of my life.
see answer to question 6. about being more grateful. more conscious of my blessings. easier to be happy and embrace happy. smile more. making more eye contact. when asked 'how are you' answering good without having to add a modifier with "but also..." make more regular time, into my life, for self-reflection.
I want to live a more balanced life. Better defined boundaries-work, pleasure, health. Vacations. Broader social circle. Not sure where I'll be with Kate. (Boy, isn't this an interesting context-sending this off to one year in the future, with no idea where I'll be.) But I do know that, regardless of what happens, I want to continue down a path of self-awareness and honesty.
By getting a new job and recognizing my intelligence, my skills, and my potential. I think the advice that might be most helpful for this is to designate a time each week to apply to jobs. I've been doing that, slowly but surely.
The main thing I want to do is be more patient and less reactive. It is too easy for my emotions to flare up and I need to learn to keep things in check and in perspective. At Rosh Hashannah services this year the Rabbi said that every human being as the spark of God in him/her. That we all have dust from the Big Bang in us and that's like the spark of God. I like that. If I can remember to see the spark of God in people I think it will help me be more patient, more loving and a better person.
I would like to be more open to spontaneous adventures (be they big or small) with my wife.
I want to save money and live healthy; I want to shop for fresh vegetables and cook at least 3 times a week (my boyfriend 1 time a week, he doesn't like cooking as much as I do :-). This after a habit of often ordering take-away for a couple of years while I was studying. I have stomach problems so I hope going back to cheap and cheerful homecooked food will help me health-wise, and that it will also help saving money for the world trip we have planned for next year.
I want not to lose my shit when I PMS every month. My pattern is to wake feeling despair for several days running and then wheedle and look for validation from among the people I love most or react badly to disappointments and pick fights. It is an emotional response. I talked to my therapist and she said it is mostly that I take my self worth from those around me. This is true and I am working with that. But it is also that I simply feel hopeless during those few days and don't know how to help myself.
I simply want to progress along the paths I have sought to travel, without letting myself down with anxieties not grounded in the physical world outside my own brain. The one quote that I try to keep in mind is this one: "Facing it, always facing it, that's the way to get through. Face it.” ― Joseph Conrad."
Put yourself first. Don't be afraid to be who you are. You'll end up in a relationship based off of a false image of who you are and you'll have to maintain that image which will get tiring and be unrewarding.
finish foundations, take the intensive. reduce anger, swearing. think of 5 things you see. 5 things you touch. 5 things you smell. Hear. Taste. Breathe & be grounded.
My goal is to live "tikkun olam," to make a difference somewhere, to help animals. I want to go back to hospice with a rescue animal. Think about using my past as a launch pad for the future, just like nature renews itself every year, renew myself with personal change. Be authentic and vulnerable and remember that mistakes are part of the human soup.
Do less. Every no is a yes and every yes is a no. What will I do with my one sweet life? Not everything is my responsibility.
I think that over the last year I have become more grateful and in some ways more earnest. I think that being grateful for everything is important, but also saying when you are struggling and need support, or if someone is not pulling their weight (friend, colleague, sibling). I want to continue with this gratitude streak and optimism. I also want to start to be a little more 'selfish'; make decisions based on what is best for me. I think this again with respect to work, friends, free time, health and not be afraid to take more time for myself for self-improvement :)
Best piece of advice: my body and my health have to come first. It's better to deal with the pain or discomfort right when it starts as opposed to waiting a few months when it worsens. Exercise and eating right are important too - I know I overall feel better when I eat right and exercise and I have to remember to do that even when I'm tired or don't wanna get up or if it's too cold or hot outside.
I would like to lower the stress in my life and become more fit. I need learn to enjoy every day and to be more thankful for what I have rather than to focus on what I don't. I have been encouraged to start meditating to become more centred and learn to relax. I'm hoping that it will be more first step to a great year. I am feeling more positive than I have in years so I'm hoping that will continue and only grow.
The thing I keep coming back to, the message that was my mantra when I was transitioning out of relationship with one I cared so deeply about, was this: Decide. Act. Move! Spend less time talking about the same tired things and more time turning those conversations into actions. "Wait and see" is a fatal trap that I am hell bent on avoiding. "Wait and see" is a symptom of fear and I am not all about that. I've got shit to do and there's no time to wait. Do it now. Do or do not, there is no try. GO. NOW.
Have belief in myself stop giving me a hard time, listen to what is being said to me an stop running like a rabbit in headlights be a more relaxed person,
I would like to have a better eatinghabit and feel more healthy, and be 50-52kg. I would like to have a more professional gravitas, and I would like to improve the nhs. I would like to be more in touch with Shalev, and speak a good level of Hebrew. I would like to sleep more. I would like to feel more Jewish and learned.
I want to do more by doing less. I feel I'm stretched a bit thin. I'd like to be able to say "no" more often - even to myself. I feel like there are so many things on my lists - I want to get rid of the things that don't matter so I can focus on the things that do.
I want to improve myself by taking care of myself for the first time in my life. I was told, "I always take care of myself first." This has always been hard for me. I have been in many dangerous and life-threatening situations in my life and often find myself making sacrifices to save someone else. I have had to do this so many times that I started to feel that this was the only way I can live my life. As a result, I am in very poor health. This year, I want to learn to put the oxygen mask on myself first before I help others.
My mother always encouraged me to look for the good in people. I am on a path to doing this more and more, and an even deeper commitment to it would be challenging and rewarding.
I want to let go more. Say yes more. Relax more. Be more present. I want to be incredibly good to myself. And I want to be more present and available for others.
I have a lot of things I'd like to improve but I think the theme of the past year has been: seek grace and simplicity. In the next year I hope I can be more graceful, more grateful, less uptight, less dissatisfied with my life - no matter what happens, no matter what I achieve or fail to achieve.
I need to learn to let things be and go with the flow. I also need to practice more restraint financially. I like to give my friends and family the best but sometimes I need to reign it in and just say we don't have the money right now. The best advice I got this year was from my friend who said to let God's will be done.
I want to continue to look after my physical, mental, and spiritual health in the next year. I want to keep my body strong and healthy with good food and daily exercise. I want to be gentle with my mind and my natural cycle of moods and needs. When I take care of myself, I will remind myself that it is so I will feel good today. It's motivation that really works for me.
Get Focused on a few areas that I am passionate about instead of getting involved in too many things where I can't give all of myself - and I just frustrate myself. I want to do everything, but the key is to do and be involved in just a few areas that I can excel in and give all of myself
Guidance is the comment "you have too much stuff!" I want to continue to get more organized and become more comfortable making gluten free foods 'with and for' my husband.
I would like to spend less time talking about things I cannot change. I remember someone saying, after a political discussion "There are things that are beneath contempt, but not beyond comment."
I'm doing a lot better at taking care of myself. That was the advice (from many people) that I took most to heart. Now, I really need to get back to regular exercise. I think the trick is to start small -- even fifteen minutes a day.
I'd like to more fully embrace my vegan lifestyle to include some activism. Expanding my repertoire in the kitchen is on the agenda and I would really like to stop drinking. Add to this more exercise and meditation and I think I'd be more satisfied with life. Oh - stop commuting 70 miles a day 3 days a week. That would help too!
Feel grateful for what I have, every single day. "Life is something which you live looking forward, but only truly understand when looking backward". No one knows the answers, just enjoy it as it goes and enjoy it again when looking back - don't try and please everyone and everything just do what makes you happy.
I think a good piece of advice I got this year was to not make major decisions based upon how seen or unseen I am by those I respect or who are in leadership over me. Another friend said I need to stop defining myself by surrounding myself with insecure leaders. I'd like to move forward knowing exactly who I am and exactly what my purpose and calling are so that those other factors can't sway me.
I would like to spend more time with my children, more time being fully present and not being anxious about all there is to do and less time fretting.
I would like to make sure to ever make anyone feel unwanted is mistreated by me. I want to be conscious of how I'm acting towards others and avoid egocentrism.
Relaxing the muscles in my body and in my face; letting my shoulders down. Listening more, talking less. I don't want to let unimportant things take up important time, and all time is important time. To be more intentional with my time and energy and attention. Move more, and more consistently. More yoga, more running. More sleep, more sex, less alcohol. Maybe no alcohol. Maybe.
I want to find the time, energy and confidence to do the things I love and make me me. I left Denmark to "find myself" so I guess I want to do that. I want to find my self. I know this is all really vague. But I hope that a year from now I'll have a less vague idea of who I am. Of what I want. And of how to achieve it.
I want to continue my new commitment to going to the pool 3 days a week - I am beginning to see real progress in my physical well-being, now that I have solved the problem of itchy skin -
Overall, I'd like to live a healthier lifestyle. I need to eat better (now always in a rush, really not preparing food as I should), exercise, spend time resting and in prayer. Because there are so many components to this goal, its a bit overwhelming. Some advice I read in the past year recommended taking on one thing at a time, making it a hard and fast rule for 21 days (to ideally form a habit) and then take on the next thing, instead of doing everything at once. I think this may be the key to 'eating the elephant'. Now I just have to decide what is the first habit to form!
Worry less. Do more. I hope my financial position is a bit better (future self: don't worry if its not though, there is more important things than money). Definitely try and control how much you worry about things and dying. Maybe get therapy.
Learn to filter conversations Learn to keep to weight and fitness goals
I want to get back into shape like I was when I was 18. But actually in better shape. I want to look strong and muscular, rather than skinny like I use to be or fat or overweight like I currently am. Going to the gym and studying strength and conditioning at Masters level will help with this. I will be happier with my life and living in Spain will massively improve my happiness levels. I hope me and my girlfriend Becky will still be together, despite the long distance. I'm sure we will survive and come out of it stronger than ever. The piece of advice that will guide me in this coming year is that it is my fault for the situation I am in. I need to take responsibility for my actions and turn them around.
I would like to stop taking things so personally. Specifically, I'd like to learn to stop being triggered into feeling unworthy when someone does something that is thoughtless.
I want to get back into shape - head wise and body wise - drink way less and exercise more Without the ability to trail run, I need to find a new way to deal with stress that doesn't involve wine
Keep meditating. Be true to yourself. Trust your instincts
Do not compare your inside self to everyone else's outside selves. You are moving at your own pace through your own journey and it's ok that it's not the same as everyone else's. Other people are going through all sorts of things they don't share publicly just like you don't share those things publicly. Don't lose sight of that in the face of bragging Facebook posts and endless engagement announcements. If you aren't doing it, you don't want it enough. Someone said this to me about writing. If you aren't sending off your pieces you don't want it enough. Don't let fear of failure or fear of anything hold you back. Just keep at it. Work hard. Keep working hard. Ever try, ever fail, no matter. Try again, fail again, fail better.
I want to be grounded next year, to be mentally stable and somewhat happy, and to connect more fully with my community (my local community and young farmers in general). I've received great advice this year from my husband and my therapist, mostly focused on letting go of my deeply held anxieties, trusting myself, and taking care of myself so that I can keep taking care of the farm and my family.
There are a few habits I would like to pick up in the next year. I find that my life can be pretty busy, with school, extracurriculars, and my interests that I pursue individually; between this I find 19 different areas I enjoy. I find that the best way to manage all of these things I s by turning them into habits. For example, if I can do all my homework once I get home from school, I have done all that I need to do for school I one session, and don't have to worry about procrastinating or worrying about it as I do other things. I can play then play guitar, read the news, eat dinner, do some drawing, work out, take a shower, catch up on a few other things, then rinse and repeat. At least, that's my theory. I'm getting the homework part down, but I find that as I try to work through so many things I get absorbed in them all fairly easily; I should spend maybe an hour playing guitar, but get into it and go on for two. I feel like trust urge is the answer for this. Obama does it; cognitive energy is spent mostly in decision making, so he has almost every second of every day planned out for him so that he can focus all his energy on his work while still managing to fit in everything else he needs to do that day. This seems like a good approach to me; plan everything in as much detail as possible, overlap things wherever you can, and maybe it is possible to accommodate so many things. I think this is going to take a lot of discipline as well. I have read up on the psychology behind habit formation to facilitate the process, but I believe, and my reading has validated that it takes a serious commitment to make this work. Everyday you have to take steps in the positive direction, and if you stray it's back to square one you go. However, I think Newton's first law of motion is applicable here: an object at rest tends to stay at rest. We like the way we live now, or at least can put up with it enough to keep going. And so it becomes hard to make a change. My theory is that you have to form habits in such a way that you almost don't notice; work them in in very small increments, maybe ten minutes a day, and build very slowly so that you can get used to your newfound habit without it encroaching upon the life you already live, until you have established the consistency to keep yourself going. I am just beginning three habits now, with a fourth already being executed, and I want to see if I can maintain them even as life happens and makes them difficult.
I want to be happy and positive next year (like I've been in the past). My advice is to LISTEN more.
I would like to continue to work on my tolerance of others or at least be better at holding back from criticizing others when I don't agree with something. I still haven't found that one piece of advice that could help me achieve this goal.
I want to know more practical skills to put compassion and love into practice. I also want to be better about letting go, whatever or whoever it is I have to let go and be at peace. Everything is temporary, but we also are here, now and must live fully.
The best piece of advice that I've been given is this: "I know that you tend to isolate when you get down or get upset. And I think that's great that you want to not bring others down. But, why would you do that to yourself? Why be negative around yourself?" That was eye opening for me. I just want to improve my integrity and be in alignment with my higher Self. I want to eat healthy, be a focused and strong athlete, show up to work. And I mean REALLY show up. I want to be a good friend and a better listener. I want to continue to be a good mom to my son and really be there for him as he continues his journey. I want to also become financially savvy. I still have a lot to learn.
Find creative direction.
I'm hoping to rediscover the electric tornado my mind used to be, when I'd write copious notes and small (yet profound) observations, then fold them into my fiction like egg whites. My brain was a Tesla coil then and I'm determined to have it back, whether through diet, exercise, supplements, voracious reading, surrealist games, color therapy and/or serial murder.
Just do what I love, whether there's someone to do it with or not.
I need to get back into my normal habits and rituals, writing everything down and organizing my living space. So much of what I do seems uptight and slightly OCD but it is what keeps my brain on track and focused. Without these things I feel adrift and stuck at the same time. I need to streamline my rituals, bring things together in one place so I don't forget anything and start to fall apart again.
Continue on healthy path. Declutter. "Don't sweat the small stuff."
I want to be more patient and kind in the coming year. I find that I only think of myself most of the time. Nothing in the past year comes to mind as a guide.
Be true to yourself. That one really resonates with me right now.
I have two immediate goals: 1- To recover, restore and improve body-mind health: stamina, mood, strength, cognitive function, mobility, endurance, agility, balance, all bodily functions, including and especially liver and kidneys; creativity, and all the intelligences necessary to thrive, prosper and flourish. 2- To heal my relationship with money and enjoy financial stability and freedom.
One piece of advice someone gave me this year that has stuck with me is when one of my best friends said to Be "I don't need to stress out because I know that the assignment will be done by the due date". It opened my eyes because it's right I don't need to stress I know I will get my work done by the due date.
I want to learn how to exude positive energy in a way that doesn't suggest willful ignorance of everything around me. The qualification on this desire is due to the fact that I perceive proponents of positive thought as oblivious or in varying stages of denial. At this time, and for the foreseeable future, I consider myself cynical in nature. I also believe in the beauty in everything. However, expressing negativity does not inspire the connection with curious lifelong-learners who have awoken minds and open hearts. It is with these people that I believe I belong and wish to spend my time. There must exist a way to express that one has a realistic grasp of the world without constantly betraying the need for pity and for validation. The allure of self-pity is powerful, but it does not invoke images of an individual who is prepared to enact meaningful change-which I am, and want to be.
Similar to last year -- work hard to be a more patient parent and take more joy in my children, rather than getting overwhelmed by them all the time. They are sweet, amazing little humans, even if they are exhausting, and I want to take the time to just enjoy their company. I want to go on more MFOs (Mandatory Family Outings) and make an effort to have FUN with them.
I want to make better decisions. I want to research more and make decisions that are unlike what I've made in the past. My thinking is that I'm not happy when any decision I have made in the past and possibly I will be happy if I make better decisions using methods other than what I've used in the past.
I need to be "present" more. My mind drifts, and it's unfair to the people I'm with when this happens. I also spend too much time thinking "Life will be better when...," instead of just enjoying life as it happens. It's so much better to be in the moment, and so very hard to do.
Drop below 200lbs! Keep pushing! Reduce debt and improve credit score!
See yesterday's answer. The house is holding us back in life. I can't have people over, the girls can't have friends over, Chris feels locked in the bedroom. This is horrible. We MUST make a change. I've gotten a million pieces of advice and counsel but in the end I need to just move my ass.
I'd like to fully commit to an exercise program. My last health screening showed that weight is the last big controllable risk factor that I still need to work on, so I would like to look back from next year and say that I've done it.
I would like to improve myself by being less stressed and more present in the moment. The counsel and advice that can help me is the Mindfulness course I am taking on line. Take deep breaths, slow down and be patient with yourself and others.
I would like to learn to love myself completely, first and foremost. To prioritize cultivate and caring for myself first so I can learn to truly care for and be present for others. This includes health and fitness but also in the realms of self-care, self-image, relationships and fiscal responsibility. I would love to learn to be financially literate, responsible and independent so I can feel that my life is truly my own.
I'd like to go back to taking guitar lessons. Music has been an important part of my life, and it would be a way of nurturing myself positively, instead of sleepwalking through my life and comforting myself with small distractions (such as watching TV). I also need to return to some form of regular exercise, and to resume finding a way of dealing with my sleep apnea. I feel my mind slipping away, and I am reasonably sure it is because I am never fully rested.
Be mindful. Live in the moment. Let it go. And is it a need or a want! Financial comfort!
I would like to improve myself in the next year by doing a personal housecleaning body, mind, spirit, physical environment. Yes there are several pieces of advice and counsel I have received that can guide me. YNAB for the financial, FlyLady for the clutter, 12 step programs for the spiritual, and Joe and Charlie tapes to explain the AA big book.
I have been reading the Tao a lot lately. I seek to soften my glare and open my heart. I believe I've been learning how to exercise my body more efficiently and I intend to do so more to improve my inner well-being and outer physical appearance. I hope I have learned to dedicate more time to my mental development as well and dedicate less time to the Internet and social networks aside from work purposes. I want to live more in the Now and more in touch with the reality and people around me. I hope to be more open and meet new people. I should write in bold: have more friends. And: be a better friend.
"You're large and in charge" Some one who used to hold my job told me that a few years ago. Although I no longer have that job I realize it was meant for more than just the work. I'm in charge of my life and how to live it. This coming year I want to work on not getting so stressed out. I want to deal with anxiety in a more productive manner and I want to not get so worked up over nonsense. I want to be the calm one. The Zen one. Not the nervous nelly who only reacts to situations in a crazy manner.
So much of my life would be better, if I could manage my stress more effectively. The origin of most of it is work-related, making me wish I could master the art of working smarter, not harder.
Karma is not a bitch; you are. I would like to trust in myself that what I put out to the universe will come back. I would love to live the balance of loving those who love me and praying for those who don't.
I'd like to work on my self-esteem everyone has doubts; what would you do if you knew you would succeed?
I would like to be a better person in general: Treat myself with more kindness and be more positive. I would also like to improve my health in all areas (physical, mental, and spiritual). I tend to have a pessimistic outlook on life since I battle with severe depression here and there. I would like to change that and learn how to become a happier human being. I know that my life will improve if I let it.
I'd like to spend more time doing and less time spinning wheels; I'd like to prioritize results over effort. "Do it now."
The end of the movie Lord of the Rings, when Frodo is standing over the fire ready to drop the ring...but doesn't want to, Sam screams to him "you've held it long enough, let it go!" I hear that in my head and there are so many things that I want to move past, forget about, and be present. Think, live, respond in the present.
I'd like to have more confidence in myself in the coming year. One of the pieces of recovery that I'm still working on is trying to shrink the size of my regrets over the past and reduce the impact of the object in my rear view mirror so I'm not as attentive to the potential for horrific things that I know I have. Instead, I want to be more attentive to the potential for good in the future.
I spent many sleepless nights this past year, ruminating about a traumatic experience I had with an ex boyfriend. It's been a work in progress for me to heal from it, but it's slow and certainly not linear. My best friend wisely told me that healing is seasonal. It comes and goes; sometimes it feels like we've gone backwards in our process, but it's important to remember where we want to go and to continue to work towards it. I think in the next year, my hope and goal is to not forget what happened (I don't think that's going to ever be possible), but certainly get to a place where I can trust and love fully again. I don't think that I'm in a place where I am able to do that right now. It really throws a kink in how I am in a relationship. Sometimes, I stop to think about how it's affected the current relationship I'm in and I wonder if I shouldn't have gone into this relationship. I worry that I'm using my current boyfriend as a way to heal myself. And that's not fair to him. So I'm working extra hard to heal me not just for me, but for him and our relationship too.
I would like to become less afraid of people...more confident in my own worth.
I want to become more confident in my talents. I need to stop looking for reassurance of my talent from others, because they will not always give it to me. I need to know that I am talented and that I can do whatever I put my mind to.
I would either like to find a way to get along with my wife, a way that we can grow closer, a way that we can settle our differences and be able to support one another in our lives apart and together. Unfortunately, all of the marriage counseling has been supremely unhelpful. I think everyone underestimates the degree to which our arguments become destructive. I feel no one understands the degree to which mental health issues affect our day to day life. Bipolar is not a now and then thing but an every day thing. Every day is a challenge. I married my wife and I love her. I want to be supportive and loving. But everyday is a challenge. I don't want to fail. I don't want to fail her. I don't know who or what can help, so I pray and do what I can, when I can, how I can.
I'm looking to improve my health. With my doctor's encouragement I have removed refined/processed sugars from my diet. This single change has made a huge difference to my health.
Death. I've realized I'm just too clueless to have any sort of meaningful life.
I would like to build a tougher skin but still stay a little sweet. I just don't want to be a push over but I don't want to be mean to people either. Everyone tells me to "Forget about others and focus on you". I've been told that I'm good and others are just intimidated by how good I am at my job or even how pretty I am. I know I'm like that sometimes but I try to you the person as inspiration. I hope I can get tougher without losing myself.
I would like to be more present when making decisions and I really need to be more positive. Not really just when I catch myself being negative I don't want to feel that way.
I would like to be a more social and extraverted person. I already made a big leap by volunteering to attend Out on Bay Street even though I didn't know anyone else who was going and I'd like to continue moving forward in that vein.
I want to be better at not being lonely. I feel very confident in myself and my life, my interests and friends, but when I like someone a lot, having them absent is kind of painful for me, and makes me really sad. I recognize this as a codependent tendency - I want to be able to miss someone and want to see them without it making me feel so sad and kind of empty. I want to be able to have the confidence in their feelings for me that allows me to feel that without questioning my own value in some way. I know that my mood is so much more stable than it used to be, but I have room to grow in that area, still. I think the things that make me unhappy are things that are either imagined or inconsequential, a lot of the time. I'm very selfish in this area, too - while I have a good grasp on the understanding that I'm busy and sometimes that means I can't see people, I really expect people to be available to me. I want to be better at self-soothing in those times, instead of getting upset.
I would like to become more giving in relationship, rather than sitting back and receiving as my default - to learn to listen, love and respect the other person in their fullest, rather than try to bend them to my will and needs.
Remember that it's not all about me. Demonstrate that every day. Best advice was from Amber in the form of a glass of OJ.
I would like to have a budget. Save money. Take a vacation.
Act upon feelings. Losing Steven made me regret not seeing him.
i want to have the confidence to venture in to running groups on my own having the courage to put myself out there
I'd like to improve my life by being a better friend and maybe giving more back to causes I think are worthy. I want to do a better job of sticking up for people when I hear others tear them down. I haven't received much in the way of advice, but I don't feel I need it.
I'd like to be more organized and manage my time better so as to continue keeping fit and healthy, as well as completing the projects described in my answer to question 6. The piece of advice, as it pertains to all relationships: "Don't sweat the small stuff."
I REALLY need to take better care of myself, which means losing at least 30 pounds. I only managed to lose 5 last year, and that is not enough.
I don't have many aspirations that last much beyond tomorrow. If I look too far into the future I'll miss what's in front of me. Stay loose, stay flexible... adaptable. Ah, the wisdom of the Sages - constant and timeless... and flawless.
I want to get out more. Get back to having a life. Reclaim my creator spirit. I haven't really been looking for advice, but I don't need it. What I need is to make time for me. I don't need someone to tell me that, I need to just do it.
Sure. Let go of the things that you carry with you. Stop trying to live up to the expectations of anyone but yourself. let. it. go.
I’ve been committed to personal teshuvah work for four years, and this past year I started working with a “teshuvah partner.” Unfortunately, our partnership didn’t really provide more than occasional chats about our frustrations and missed marks; we didn’t push one another in a meaningful way or hold one another accountable. I’d like 5776 to include more clarity about how such a partnership can work as well as a personal exploration of Mussar practice. The goal, of course, is to establish healthier habits/routines and aim for a happy work/family balance.
In this year I want to become a little bit worthy of taking n the novice level role of Rabbi......and I am overwhelmed at both the opportunity that presents as well as the way-over-my-head challenge. 1 1/2 years left....but then I really start to learn. My cohort members say "I know nothing" and so many of them seem to know everything I don't. When I say it I mean it; and probably always will. This year I want to become more singularly focused when I'm working and not try to divide my attention. But I also want to get better at putting work completely aside to play with my grandchildren, do my Zumba or yoga and sew.
My big lesson from this year: Be in charge of myself, quite trying to control outcomes for other people, especially Eric. Listening to my own intuition and being ok with others thinking that I am anything less than perfect is the name of the game. I would like to become more confident, less dependent on external validation, more me.
Follow the beat of my own drum and worry not about what everybody else thinks or might think. To truly live an authentic, true to me life.
I read somewhere recently that protest may be the nearest thing we have to the prophetic call of ancient times. I think some times I'm too willing to look for compromise or to believe that working within the system will build the kind of world I want. So perhaps this year I'd like to work on protesting more - on being willing to say the system isn't working and it needs more change than simply slight tweaking.
It doesn't matter how slow you're going, as long as you don't stop. - this one directly relates to a goal to run more and be more fit. And of course, courtesy of the amazing Kelly Sue DeConnick, a reminder that I have to do the work to see the results, and I CAN do the work. "You get to extraordinary one small step at a time. The dirty little secret: there's no seat limit at that table. What's today's small step?"
The biggest improvement I would like to make is becoming a more confident leader in the organizations I love and the things I find important. This past year, the best leaders I truly met were my supervisors at Camp Harlam who guided me through the toughest four weeks of my life. In those 4 weeks I learned so much about myself and the children that I want to one day work with.
I would like to be calmer. "Sometimes you need to focus on helping yourself so that you can help others"
I want to find a measure of peace and contentment. I've had lots of advice. Do yoga. Meditate. Attend religious services. Quit your job. But I think, after a year of wrenching loss and terrible depression and fear that I am finally starting to like my own company again. I think that a contemplative year and plenty of solitude- space to think and to heal- are what I need.
To be even more aware of my speech and its impact on others. I listen to my prayers which always counsel care about words.
Make habits! Eat, sleep, exercise and ask for help when you need it! It's okay to say no and it's okay to leave people if they're tiring you out. Be real and be honest. I'd like to improve my communication and leadership skills next year. I want to be a better researcher, a better research-article-reader, study better, and be a better daughter, a better friend and a better girlfriend! I don't want to sleep during meetings anymore either. I want to be a better note-taker and money saver LOL [I need to actually use up all my stuff before buying more art supplies for example] Just breathe, think about your words and visualize the result that you want into everything that you do.
I want to continue getting into shape physically. It is one thing that makes me feel proud and accomplished this year. I like the feeling of working hard physically, and I love feeling my hard muscles. I saw a photo in which I am just on the edge of the frame, just my upper arm, andit looked good! This is definitely a different experience for me -- usually photos upset me. Since Wayne Dyer's recent death, I have been reading his memoir, and I am impressed by his insistence on being himself and doing what feels right to him. He also worked extremely hard to make his own luck. I would like to follow my passions and be brave enough to set out on my own adventure. And I would like to work extremely hard to make my wishes come true.
Again just to focuss more on the people arund me, I'm happy in my own thoights, but this isn't how I want to live my life. Also to be less limited by my disbailty, and what I think I can't do. No advice
How to Improve myself...I would like to focus on positive thoughts and I would like to keep negative thoughts out of my mind as much as possible. Sometimes I dwell on the things that have bothered me and I would prefer to let things go more easily or just put my energy towards positive thinking.
Recently a friend I admire told me about the two wings of Buddhism - wisdom and compassion. I would like to develop those wings in a balanced way - to be able to be more generous, and that any wisdom I can offer comes from a place of giving rather than of being right.
I would like to continue to explore as I have been. 'Try everything once and always stay in control' has been working for me pretty well so far.
I want to be more confident. Put myself more out there. My advice is to just do it; feel the fear and let it dissipate. All feelings are temporary ;)
I could do with a reminder to live for the little things and not to sweat the small stuff. But I would like to make myself more motivated, I feel caught up in a bit of a cycle at the moment that I need to break out of.
If I get the time I'd be interested in going in looking at Shadow work... but basically, I'm interested in accepting my shadow more and more... to know myself more deeply, and accept the parts I've been hiding from. this will make me much safer in the world... as I won't be waiting for other people to find out that : I can be insecure, jealous, that I sometimes help others in order to feel worthy, that I can feel both superior and inferior because I often feel disconnected, that I'm not always open hearted or kind... I will see that these things are in me, and I still love myself.
I wrote too soon again. Yesterday, for the achievement questions I wrote stress less, which really should have been today’s answer. So the next best thing, although related to the first is mood management. When I get grumpy sometimes I am having hard time to get out of it for no good reasons. I want to better utilize the tools I already know of and find new ones if necessary to change that. Snapping out of it is possible. Not getting upset or at least not showing being upset when doing so can cause more harm than ideal is also possible. I can learn how to do it.
I would like more energy.
In so many ways! Here are just a few: I want to be less stressed and more efficient, both personally and professionally. I don't want to be the person who can't get from A to B without crying at the side of the road because she's so lost. I don't want to be scatty and disorganised at work any more. I don't want to be panicking before an event or a meeting because I don't feel like I'm prepared enough. I want to be more mindful. I don't really know what this means, but I like the idea of it. I want to get fit again. A significant part of that is to focus on my back getting better. I need to do physio exercises, pilates and swimming. I want to stand up for myself more, and to stop falling back on self-deprecation - when I've done something well, I want to be confident enough to own up to it. I want to learn a language. And I want to stop making excuses and procrastinating.
I would like to organize my life better. Not only home -wise (decluttering, especially the basement), but also personal organization. Make some goals, and track them instead of just floating on. I will be discussing this with Marlene tonight and will make a plan. I think that if I have less clutter physically and emotionally, then I'll have a better grasp on what I need to do and how to get there.
I'd like to take steps to further my career...whether it is taking a bigger role in my current group, posting to a new team, leaving the company, or at least pursuing my PMP certification.
I want to work on my compassion and generosity for others. It's so easy to get caught up in the comparisons between one family and another. I want to cut down on the judgement I have for others and bring more compassion.
I think I'd like to reign in my materialism. Relative to many of my peers, I do not spend alot on things like clothes, jewelry, "stuff". But I have plenty! It's more about wanting. I *do* like nice things, and want my home and my appearance to reflect me, but also, what do I really need? nothing.
I would like to be a more calm, relaxed person. I'm too uptight and busy now. I can't think of any advice that's been given to me, it's my own internal voice guiding my desire.
I would like to improve myself by not being so flakey and just understanding that it's better to say no than to say yes and then let somebody down. I would also like to get back some of my old motivation. I've become a bit cynical and would like to be the happy and optimistic person that I was in years past.
Don't let politics become the only job you have. Keep at sales and keep advancing in your career. Politics is not your identity. Go to law school and focus on not taking on too much debt. Be true to yourself, your goals and your dreams. Be kind to yourself, patients while pursuing your goals and stay focused on your dreams.
I would like to improve myself by not letting people tell me what to do and doing what I think id right for me. Also I am working on not smoking and drinking anymore because I found a girlfriend that makes me feel I do not need to do that to have fun. I can just be with her and be happy and smile at her and say to myself I am a better person now. Also I am stopping drinking for her and for me because my family has a drinking problem and I do not want that to happen to me because I am still young. I have been guide by my true friends that have always been there for me when I need them and they are the main reason I do not need to get high and drunk to have fun I just need to be myself and with people that will accept me for me.
I would like to do more to help people and be more indipendent like getting my liscence and a good enough job to support me and help my parents out a little I would say to just go ahgead and get your permit faster
"It's a change in how the person is talking to themselves, relating to themselves, around whatever they are struggling with." That's what I want to keep in front of me for the year. Other than that, the improvement (stats, Spanish, seeing, how I want my career to grow) is covered in Q6.
I am on a pretty serious lifestyle change mission currently. In the last 6 months, I've lost about 35 pounds, continued my exercise plan, started socializing with the people I care about on a more regular basis, and started dating again after my breakup. I realize that more than anything that has shaped this year. In the next year, I'd like to keep this momentum going. I want to finally get to my goal weight and get into maintenance mode. I think as far as advice goes, mostly I've gleaned my salient points through experience. I'm trying to live my life by a 4 word motto Be nice, maximize fun. I think if I can look back on a year and say that I have done both of those things I am doing pretty well, and I intend to use that moving forward as a way to guide myself through my various interactions with the world.
I want to be closer to God and understand what He wants for me and from me.
Use what you learned in your coaching training! Both when thinking for yourself and when talking to friends and colleagues.
I want to be happier and appreciate my many blessings in life. I have a lot to be grateful for and want to enjoy and celebrate what I have and to live every day to its fullest.
Act "as if"
I hope to maintain my rock climbing and rowing and I hope to get back into pole dancing, and/or perhaps other types of dance like ballet. I will continue to make the effort to maintain and improve my diet so that it is more consistent and balanced. I will finish the birth educator training and work on developing my skills for my career.
Feel more connected to people.Focus on making others comfortable,
I sorta hate these kinds of questions. I always want to lose weight, be more thankful, be a better person, and all that crap. Sometimes I succeed at it and sometimes I don't. To be perfectly honest I feel like I've lost my way, I have nothing to look forward too, like I'm floating in an abyss. It is the strangest feeling... it happened after I quit my job. Does that mean my job defined me?!?! I never thought it did. Maybe it's because I'm not doing anything of value, or what I perceive as value. Maybe if I figured out a way to find value in what I'm doing now, I would feel less lost. I guess that would be a life improvement, to be ok with where I am now. How does one do that, I have no idea.
I would like to be available to whatever God has for me and unafraid to walk in it. A couple of things I've read this year: "Whether they accept me or not, I am still deeply loved, completely forgiven, fully pleasing, totally accepted, and complete in Christ." - Search for Significance "I expect you to take your ego out of the situation and judge the situation dispassionately." - M from Casino Royale (movie) "Once you see your life choices in terms of your desire to relieve tension, many things make sense." - Charles Duhigg in More magazine "In order to get to peace, you have to push through what makes you uncomfortable." - Cesar Milan - the Dog Whisperer "Loved folks love folks. Hurt folks hurt folks." - unknown Hmm...I have these quotes (and others) on cards at my desk at work. I think I'm starting to see a theme here: I don't like conflict and I want people to like me and treat me well. (Does this mean I'm narcissistic or anxiety-prone? Probably.) Improvement may need to include becoming unafraid to step into conflict, rather than avoiding it, even if that conflict leaves me unliked by some.
"...when you grow up, you get told that world is the way it is and your life is just to live inside it...try not to bash into the walls too much...that's a very limited life. Life can be much broader...everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you...you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things...and, the minute that you understand that you can poke life...and something will pop out the other side...that's maybe the most important thing...to shake of this erroneous notion that life is there and your just going to live in it versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it..." -Steve Jobs I actually heard this chunk of an interview that Jobs did back in the late 90s via my favorite YouTube vlogger, Casey Neistat. The reality that you only get one life, a short one at that, is a realization that is very eye opening and one that puts an enormous sense of urgency on life to get going and get the things done that you want to get done. And, get them done NOW. There is no later. You don't have to play by the rules. You create your destiny, it's not written for you and no one owes you a thing. I've spent my entire professional career trying to make other people happy. It's sort of the nature of my gig as a designer. However, it's time to push back and do the type of work I want to do. Not the work that my boss puts on my desk. I've been fortunate enough to be very successful and I'm thankful for all of it. It's just that it's probably time to start a new chapter. As I've mentioned in a previous question, by this time next year I'd love to be at a new job in a different market. Whether that's working for a new agency or working for myself, I'm not sure yet. We'll see how it plays out. I've never really seen my career as work. It's what I love to do, but if I'm not doing the kind of projects that satisfy me creatively, then it's time to change it. If I can change all that in a year, then my life will be improved tremendously.
I would really like to incorporate more exercise and more prayer into my daily routine. I have started to do daily Talmud study and that is something I am both enjoying and am proud of.
I want to be more productive. I've added some fun activities to my life and my days are full. I want to do the same for my evening life. I don't necessarily need to be outside but would like to accomplish more of my projects.
Keep moving forward. Progress not perfection! Be another year closer to paying off our Home Equity loan (be within two years of payoff or closer). Pertservere! Continue doing my job in excellence! Have the important people in my life trust me again. Get rid of mean spiritedness.
I would like to have better management of my anxiety. It's something that has increased to a level I never imagined. I started therapy, so I hope that helps.
I would like to work on being fully present in each moment, and on learning deeply and doing thoroughly the things I am trying to learn and do. I often learn, or do, just enough to get by. For instance, instead of just stacking things on the counter until I get too sick of seeing it and having to spend a weekend cleaning...just putting things where they go in the first place would be better. This will take more time. So I will need to plan less in a day. I would like to do less, and do each thing better. I keep returning to the things I heard about my parents at their anniversary celebration. Integrity. Sincerity. Attention. I want to bring those qualities to the things I say I'll do.
I would like to find an element that makes me feel not just like a robot creating and implementing systems, but like a person who is living a worthwhile life. I feel it in flashes but it is fleeting. I feel like I have 95% of my purpose. It's that last 5% that is missing. What could it be? I'm searching for it. That's how to improve my life. How to improve myself? Let me count the ways! I would like to be more trusting of goodness, more faithful to God, more honest about my own failures and shortcomings, and more elastic in responding to and improving on my own deficiencies. I would like to be more giving of myself with less conscious or unconscious feeling of being "owed" in return. I would like to be less panicky. I would like to be a stronger source of support for my kids and husband. I would like to be less afraid that I'll lose all the goodness if my body is not perfect. There is not one piece of advice that could address any of that, but I do look to the sermons at church as a source of guidance. There tends to be helpful counsel in those, difficult to follow, but when followed it addresses such things. I also need to listen the advice of my teachers -- my boss, the teachers of the classes I am taking -- and I need to find more teachers to be the sources of advice. This is how I can grow beyond what I am now, grow beyond myself.
To be self reliant. My life with a partner has ended, and I want my daughter to be well adjusted and independent. I really need to model that for her. Over the past year I have read and heard many inspirational things, yet nothing stands out. The total of all of it adds up to "Do You." I will stay true to who I am, make my own decisions and take care of myself and my kids.
I would like to lose some weight to help with the arthritis. I would like to have time to do what is important to me instead of what is important to others, and I can get there by focusing on what is really important.
I want to improve myself and my life by living in the moment. My head is full of constant worry. I am trying to learn how to slow my mind down, maybe take some yoga? Meditate? This is a huge struggle with me.
I would like to be able to catch myself before anger boils over. Long before anger boils over. I would like to become more circumspect and more in the moment, but not appear (or feel myself to be) detached. I still want to be affected by things/people--just not overwhelmed. My counselor helped me understand parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems responses. I have come to see that wearing myself thin--or wearing myself out, as the case may be--shortens my life and isn't fun for anyone around me.
I would like to navel gaze less, laugh more, socialize more, treat myself more like a person and less like a maid, nanny, underling/intern, plan less and be in the moment more.
Remember to be compassionate to my family, and not assume that they are doing things on purpose to be irritating or unsuccessful. Be patient with them. Listen. Don't yell at the kids so much. I got so mad at #2 this weekend - under stress, so I start being mean to everyone so we meet our deadlines. I need to work on planning better so we don't have a yelling emergency to get out the door on time.
I want to move out. I want to get paid more. I want a job I don't hate. I want to write more.
Spend more time doing the things I enjoy doing. Life is too short to do things you don't enjoy doing.
I would like to better myself by being more consistent in my pursuits. I slack off and don't like to hear that I have slacked off. I am now pursing a Post Bacc to make up for that behavior in my undergrad and I still see some traces of that in my work. I need to stick to the plan and not fall off. I advise myself to make small manageable goal with consequences and rewards for my feats. I need to do well in this Post Bacc in order to get into a good Grad. program.
ORGANIZATION. I mean that on so many levels. Physically, mentally, just getting my shit together. I think it's going to come only when I'm honest with myself about what I can do and really struggle with, and pushing myself. Making small changes. Asking for help, and not being ashamed/embarrassed about it. I've accepted the fact that I'm a hot mess. I need to work harder to highlight my strengths, and not hide my weaknesses, but balance them out and support them. Better articulation of my words and writing. Advice from this past year? Hmmm. I don't have anything in particular that stands out, but I did receive a LOT of advice regarding the job search and new job. Which have all been incredibly helpful, and I am grateful for. All of this has made me a better person and professional.
Do it! The hardest part to anything is simply starting it. The things you don't know, you'll be forced to figuring them out. We took this approach with renovating our kitchen. I had a little bit of knowledge going into it, but there was a lot of things that I didn't know. By just starting them, I couldn't look back; I had to figure them out and forge a path ahead. Now, just apply that logic to difficult life adventures. That's really all...
I'd love to stick with my shake/smoothie diet for a while and keep losing weight. I keep going back and forth between 5 pounds, so I just need to keep working until I lose at least 15. I want to be healthier and feel better.
I want to remember that there is a joy in the journey. I'd like to work on my confidence in myself. I'd like to have more control over my emotions. I'd like to be in the process of making a decision about graduate school or next steps in my life. Before my Avodat Halev this summer at BCI, Andrew said to me, "the work is the work." I need to live that.
I'd like to become more healthy and strong. Exercise more and stick with non-processed foods which I do largely. Do some meditation to decrease the stress in my life.
I would like to be kind with myself, yet motivational. I want to get things done at a pace that is reasonable and healthy for me without judgement, only encouragement. Jonathan advised me to make a schedule and do "one thing" each night instead of having 5 things to do and getting none of them done. I want to enjoy who I am and the progress I've made. Jonathan also said that we "made it. " We're free and should enjoy our adulthood. I feel free. I want to enjoy it!
"Make space for Me and I will fill it with holiness." -- Exodus 25:8. HaMakon: more present to, mindful of my partnership with G!d in this world.
I want to expand my capacity to be free in any circumstance. I want to keep liberating myself. I want to explore my energy in a way that surprises me. I want to keep opening my heart, loving myself deeply and others profoundly. I was given the advice to ground myself, to move my energy through dance, to read some books, to honor myself by asking for what I need and ensuring I am responsible for what I need to thrive and be me.
I need to get to know my family - especially the kids. I've been focused on getting my dissertation done and it's sometime been a way of not dealing with the autism dynamics at home -
Keep focused on positive goals. Track successes. Wake up early and start my day with a routine that brings me inward. Laugh more. Take a vacation. Enjoy these days, watch my children grow, enjoy their sparkle and their joys and their cuddles. Forgive myself, and forgive those around me. Aspire to LOVE
I'd like to honestly believe that I am worth the time and energy it takes to be healthy. Advice: If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anyone.
I really really want to be doing fulfilling work by the time next year, as in working for a company that makes me feel good about my contribution to life and the world in general. I want to leave this world a better place than I found it, and I desire that my work supports that. The piece of advice I've gotten is "Don't be sloppy with your life." For some reason, it really spoke to me. More than "YOLO" or any of those other phrases that people bandy about when it comes to seizing the moment. You get one life; DON'T.BE.SLOPPY.
I would life to improve myself by attending more events and being social. No there has not been any counsel.
I continue to need to loose weight. That is what I'd like to improve. I visited a nutritionist this year and she helped me to be less hungry, but not to loose weight, so far. The best advice I have so far - keep in mind why I want to do this.
Happiness. Defining happiness in each area of my life from work to being a husband and dad and holistic. I feel very torn between constant objectives that I fail to enjoy the happy moments as I am aware of other areas that I do not enjoy. Live in the moment. Be kind and respect others. Make the best of a situation and move on.
I want to be more disciplined with my wellness and my finances. I want to get back into a gym routine and I want to make saving money a priority again. The advice? Well, I get it bimonthly from my bank account when I see no money left. And I get it every time I look at a picture of myself. I don't look the success I want to be.
I'd like to be more timely in answering voice mails, texts, emails... when people reach out, I shouldn't make them wait days or weeks to hear back, especially when it means so much to me that they want to talk. I took a step in the direction of staying better connected by scheduling regular Thursday dinners with my parents this year. It's not my favorite night of the week, but it's good for me and good for them and so worth it.
Take a moment to breathe. Take a nap if you need it. It's okay to say no. Use your scooter.
My physical and mental health and being the best mother I can are paramount priorities this year, and a few pieces of advice are helping to guide me: "You can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves." This has become my mantra in dealing with a soon-to-be ex-husband who is an alcoholic and a narcissist. Finally, this year, I realized that I cannot help him, no matter how hard I try, because he does not want to change. He may never change. But it is no longer my problem to deal with, and it was NEVER my fault. As I work to disentangle myself from him, I just have to keep repeating this. I feel I will improve myself just by virtue of no longer being in his toxic environment. I already feel more healthy for that. "Let your children fail." It sounds harsh, but it's really about problem solving and learning. As my baby becomes a fully-fledged toddler, I see him get frustrated when trying things, and my impulse is to swoop in and set things right immediately. But ultimately, I know it is better for him in the long run to begin learning how to solve his own problems, change approaches, and be flexible. "Take care of yourself." Very simple and obvious, yet easy to ignore.
I am working hard to achieve a promotion this year. There is a very specific set of metrics that I must meet, and so far I have fallen just short of the standard. Hopefully by the first of the calendar year I will be able to say I made it.
I hope I can take better care of my own health.
Keep your mind and your heart open.
I think the best reminder I've gotten this year is when Joel said "There's good stress and bad stress". I'd like to continue to learn how to separate the two, and to keep a level head about the things I can do nothing.
I am on a quest for physical health and fitness. I on;t need to be the perfect size 2 (or 4, 6, or even 8), but I want to get and keep all my numbers down.
Drink less beer and drink more wine, study more, live more in the outdoors. Spend less time in useless or tedious activities.
This year I plan to continue on my journey to self-love & discovery. I want to be more intentional in how I am kind to myself. Find ways to set aside time for exercise & reading, two things I know make me happy but I have a hard time doing regularly. The advice I would give myself is to be a better friend to myself, be gentle.
I think it's past time I shed some dead weight in my life - both physically, and emotionally. I can't say there is a specific piece of advice, so much as an overall theme of discovering who/what is really important in life.
I need to improve my physical health. I need to get in better shape, and build more muscle. My son is only going to get bigger and heavier and I need to be strong enough to handle him, without hurting myself as a result. The piece of advise to guide me is my own - Nothing changes if nothing changes - Therefore, I need to be my own force for change and get my butt in gear and exercise, eat right and take care of myself, not just for me but for my family, too.
Oh Harry. Harry, Harry, quite contrary. He's generous with his advice and generally I take it. I can yell "fuck you" at him a lot one day and apologize and he'll kindly dish out a mixed bag of insight and platitude the next. There's such a kind of constancy there. I appreciate it so. Harry and I were talking about love, fear, and vulnerability. He had a quote from another tradition that was similar to lines from the Gita and the Yoga Sutras. As I remember them: "Better to do your own dharma imperfectly than to do someone else's perfectly" and "You are not entitled to the fruit of the practice, only to the practice." Listen, I'm feeling heartbroken right now because I'm 34 and I don't know what my big plan is. I'm taking a sick day with strep from my mild-mannered office job and I just ate a fallen gob of cheese and spinach off of the inner crook of my elbow in the middle of the dining room. Do I look like a human being who has any fucking answers? I look like I might not even know what napkins are for. (I actually just really like spinach.) All. I. Know. Is. That. I. Have. A. Process. All I know is that, results be damned, I absolutely have a right to the practice. I absolutely have the right to be and enact myself, to take up space in the world and to explore it, and to figure out where I fit and what I have to add, AND where I don't and where I fail to contribute. I absolutely have the right to make mistakes, to mess it up, to learn, to continue. No matter how I feel, I always deserve the right to continue trying. It was never about the results? I'm exploring this idea. They can disappear in a flash. I could find myself in a good relationship with someone and they could die tomorrow. I could make a million dollars and lose every cent. But what did I learn? I'm thinking about the Kalevala now, and the Finnish virtue called "sisu," a quality of positive stubbornness. The hero of that epic, Vainamoinen, builds a boat, but not just once. He goes on picaresque adventures literally to Hell and back to find the right spells to sing a boat into being the first time. Then he goes on his quest and fails to get the girl. But the next time he goes a-questing, this time for the Macguffin, what does he find but a boat already built, that will respond only to his lead. Failure quest #2 results. But later, when a giant fish swallows up both the sun and moon, and everyone is hungry and freezing (don't ask me, this is myth talking), what does the world need except a guy who knows how to build a boat? And he goes and he takes out that fish and everyone lives happily ever after. And then Jesus is born, and the epic hero of another age builds yet another boat and sails away for another day when he is needed. I swear I have a point, and it is one about sisu--positive stubbornness--and the value of practice. I feel scared offering this as advice to a future self (and that's a silly idea, isn't it? you know more than I do...) but: persist. I persisted to become you, you-a-year-from-now. Persist. Go questing. It's your right to make mistakes. And if you need, build yourself another boat. xoxo.
I would like to feel more empowered to reach my goals. Be kind to yourself (ie. keep self critic in check)
I would like to improve my organizational skills at work and I would like to make my wife happier by supporting her more and for always being there for her.
I really need to keep working harder on being a better wife. I need to be more present with James and to cherish our time together instead of taking it for granted. I want to remember to make a purposeful effort every day to make him happy in some small way. I need to remember that we are on the same side: we are not adversaries, we are partners. I do not need to fight with him, and instead we need to both try to see each other's point of view without thinking that doing so means we are ceding "victory" in some way. I want to make a more purposeful effort to *love* James in the active sense of that verb as opposed to a passive way. I would like to be a better mother. I want to pay more attention to my kids and be more present and active in their lives. Finally, I have more work to do when it comes to liking and accepting myself. I rely too heavily on other people's approval and acceptance, and it is really bad for me :(
I would like to stop making excuses, holding myself back, being afraid and being paralyzed. It is almost impossible for me to consider putting myself out there and being seen, and I need to break through this to get to where I want to go. I have a dear friend who is in a similar place, and she said to me recently that the only way out is through. We talked about how we wouldn't have big ideas if we weren't supposed to be using them, that our perspectives on the world were unique and necessary. The best advice I've gotten is with regard to my fear, trying to make friends with it and taking care of it so it doesn't rule me. It's helped, but there is still something more in there that needs to be worked through....
Fully embrace the fact that I cannot change the people around me. I can only change how I respond to them. But this is very hard!
I would like to keep good grades and get a job and help my mother out in life to make her life easier. BE HERE, NOW
I am still struggling with weight loss. But my husband told me that I need to get comfortable with how I look. He says I look great!
I want to eat better, be more mindful of what I put into my body. I am aiming to feel more balanced, control what I can, and be okay with what I cannot.
To live more consciously.
I would like to monitor my anxiety better and stop taking my stress out on other people I care about. I would also like to stop being so critical of people, including myself. "Stress is not what happens to us. It's our response TO what happens. And RESPONSE is something we can choose." - Maureen Killoran
I'd like to improve myself by accepting myself more fully. I have always worked to change myself and am trying to balance it with a little more acceptance.
confidence, talk to more people and improve my sociability and humor
I want to be healthy - my back better and leaner. I want to not be thinking about my back al the time and be doing yoga, snowboarding, etc. I know it s patience - but that's hard I would like to improve my reactionary tendencies. I am recovering well, but i would like to learn to pull back on the reactions and not be so hard on my kids
Worry less about what others think of me and my decisions. Courage to go for what I want to do without worrying about what others think or what happens if I fail. More patience and compassion with my kids. Better connections with my friends. There are endless ways to improve myself…. Improvement in any one of these would be great.
"You don't need as much from him as you think you do." I can be free to love and accept him for who he is, and be more relaxed in general if I stop expecting him to take care of me all the time. And if I stop feeling like I need to be taken care of all the time, I will be more relaxed and feel happier in general with my life and myself.
I want to be healthy, if that means working out and eating right. I realllyyy want to be happy and secure in my body.
I want to move to Tarrytown and have a job that pays enough to live there comfortably. I feel like I have accepted mediocre as okay because I'm working towards a goal, but now that the goal is in sight, it's like "now what?" I don't want to live here and have the life I have now. I never thought I was worthy of more...now I do. I think the only advice that I have gotten was the advice to go for the life I want rather than the one I think I can get. No one gave me that advice in that way, but piecing together things people have said to me, that is what I have come up with.
i'd like to try to remain dairy free- I definitely think it's helping with my diet and exercise - and I want to make exercise a continuous part of my life. I just want to feel better (and maybe look better too).
It seems like every year I have to answer this question, and no year have I gotten anywhere closer to a satisfying conclusion. The improvements are almost always the same: In need of a job, looking for a good and healthy relationship to eventually grow into a family, hoping to make my life better overall to have some sort of comfort in living. A man said to me the other day, "Keep the faith," and that's all I feel like you can do sometimes. Push forward and keep the faith. So that's what I'm going to do, in dating, finding a job and making a new life.
By this time next year I'd like to be in a better place with my time management. I want to be using all or most of my time productively and be able to say that I am making the most of my minutes, hours and days. It's important to me because this is something I struggle with constantly. I have an innate tendency to want to waste time, be lazy, procrastinate, and I have to actively fight that tendency all the time. It would be nice to not have to fight it, because I've overcome it! I don't know if overcoming it is something I'll ever be able to fully do, but I really want to work on it this year. I want to be more in control of my time, and not the other way around. My therapist tells me that he is impressed by my sense of integrity. I'd like to live fully and with integrity, and I'd like to always be at peace with myself and my decisions.
Mindfulness. Generosity. Gratitude. 24/7 yo.
Over the next year, I would like to reduce my workload and my stress level, return to playing soccer, return to regular (daily) exercise, and begin a meditation practice. The first two will re-balance my work and family effort, and the second set will improve me. These are all things that, over the past year and a half, have been suffering from lack of attention and effort as all of my energy and time have gone to the office. I have reached the limit of what I can do there, and need to pull back, either by simply doing less, or by doing things more efficiently. If I cannot effectively reduce the time and stress I spend on my workplace, then it's time to find a new job, either within the company or without. I cannot allow work to continue to rule my life.
I would like to be closer to my creator. I would like to feel more in tune with his plan for me, and find myself lead to knowledge of the truth. I would like to put more trust and control in his hands. "And God must be a pretty big fan of today, because you keep waking up to it. You have made known your request for a hundred different yesterdays, but the sun keeps rising on this thing that has never been known. Yesterday is dead and over. Wrapped in grace. Those days are grace. You are still alive, and today is the most interesting day. Today is the best place to live." — Jamie Tworkowski
Don´t carry a gun.
One of my friends always says, "Don't spend time with people you aren't absolutely in love with." It's motivated me to find ways to love people I wouldn't otherwise choose to spend my time with (coworkers, etc) and it's allowed me to deeply appreciate my friends and how much I love them. In the next year, I want to continue to open myself to love and to give love readily. I don't want to be closed off and guarded. I want everyone who chooses to spend time with me to do so because they're absolutely in love. And I want to be absolutely in love with myself, most of all.
I have started taking anti-anxiety medication and I am working to improve my overall health both spiritually, emotionally, and physically/nutritionally through more exercise (biking and zumba with Kinect, plus walking a lot more at work when I can), healthier eating choices, trying to cut back on dairy foods and taking multivitamins. I hope to avoid the flu this year with my flu shot and taking generally better care of myself. I am going to start seeing a therapist so I can get a better grasp on my stress and anxiety without having to rely on medication to function at work. I will be exploring other career options to hopefully find something that will help improve my finances and my stress levels. I know I can make strides towards these important goals because I have the unwavering support of the love of my life. Maybe once I get my life together, it may be time to consider getting engaged...?? ;-)
I want to be healthier - in all ways. I want a great body that I fuel with nutrient dense foods. I want to think healthier thoughts that are kinder to my own well being. I want to develop healthier relationships with those around me and with my work. I want everything to be healthy! And happy! This starts with surrounding myself with good, positive people who are willing to support me. I am going to cut down any negative pathways, as this no longer serves me.
I would like to bring in more money so that my husband and I are not living so close to the edge. You have to have a goal to make it come true.
I think that I may need counseling. Need might be a strong word - I think I could benefit from counseling. I'm feeling like I've lost my support system in Delaware and my family is far away. I never thought that I would regret being far away from them. Self-care - I need to start taking care of myself. This is not just going to the gym. This means taking charge of my health.
I would like to be a better parent and feel that I am a better parent.
My actions are my only true possesions, I would like to work on how i handle emotionally triggering situations so that i'm a more gentle and safer individual to be around in times of strife. I tend to become prickly and aggressive to say the least when threatened. If i practice my breathing and stay centered i will feel so much better.
Walk willing. Walk towards everyone with love and compassion in your heart. Be patient. Be open. Be loving.
Reading my answer to this question last year felt very predictable. I knew what was coming, and I remember feeling that way. This year though I do see some ways in which I and my life can improve. I would like to figure out why I feel exhausted all the time. I would like to figure out why my ears and my jaw and my digestion is irregular. I would like to figure out if I am getting meaningful sleep. I would like to feel better. I know that is vague, but if I am feeling better at this time next year, I will know exactly what I mean. It has been difficult, and the process toward improvements is slow, but it is a process I have begun and one I must continue to commit to.
same as always I would like to be healthier, thinner, read more, be better at my business, and more financially in control, i doubt any of that will happen. i need to listen and start saying no, and making time for things.
I would like to be gentler with myself. I can make beating myself up an Olympic sport. Learning how to forgive others seems to be much easier than learning how to forgive myself. I'd like to try to make that change in the next year.
I would like to be more true to myself and what I know I can accomplish; get closer to meeting my potential (whatever that should turn out to be).
it's always the same - get physically in better shape. do some exercise and lose some weight. there is neither epithet nor guru to guide me in this. I know what to do. I just have to do it. will this be the year?
I would like to go back to learning, either in grad school or through farming experiences. It's time to learn real things. I need to seek out what I want more. I need to believe that I can do that successfully.
I would like to improve my life by becoming a more giving person. I love to volunteer and would love to find an organization that I can volunteer at. I love knowing that I am helping something that is bigger than me. I t really makes me feel good about myself and the world in general. This past year has been very stressful for my mother, but she has continued to help me and give me a lot of helpful advice. I cannot think of something off the top of my head that she has specifically said, but she has and will always give me guidance and advice.
Now that I’m past the worst of my health condition and am on the mend, I am focused on getting back into shape and regaining the healthy life style I had years ago. I think the hardest part of this is finding the strength to push past the aches and pains and maintain discipline, my only advice there is approach every day like it’s the only day that matters.
More active and healthier, more relational, patient, quick to love, slow to anger. Basically, the areas I am always chipping away at.
I'd like to continue my sobriety. I'd also like to lose some weight and just feel better about myself. Or I'd like to just not care about my weight as much, as long as I'm in good health.
I am improving my physical health. Regular exercise and weight loss are at the top of my priority list. Not just the weight loss but a whole lifestyle change. I have gotten lots of advice, but it was someone reminding me that it is about lifestyle, not just a diet.
Be fully present , moment to moment. Cultivate the practice of patience, waiting, tzim tzum to allow others to flourish. Slow down.
maslow's hierarchy of needs Self Actualization Esteem Love/Belonging Safety Physiological
Chill out. You are responsible for YOU, no one else. Don't let the crazies get you down, don't shoulder all the responsibility for them. Walk away when you need to.
I would like to "date" and find someone special. I would like to exercise a little more. There is a famous saying that I can't remember off the top of my head but it's something like in order for somebody to love you, you have to love yourself. I do love myself but if I can improve myself I will feel more proud.
Finding my voice and speaking my truth are key. I've spent too many years being too concerned with placation, peace-making, and with making people like me. I've taken the unfortunate road of being kind of a chameleon - I'll agree with people and find ways to support what they are saying, even if I fundamentally disagree or think that I am much more in the right than they are. This doesn't actually do anyone any favors, and it's gotten me into more uncomfortable situations than I'd like to admit. If I can speak, act, and live my truth then I'll have the peace of mind that comes from consistency and from knowing that I stayed true to myself and my values. I have a lot of compassion and empathy, and in too many cases that has translated into just letting my values, needs, and opinions get trampled - I need to define and exercise that boundary between being understanding of others and internalizing others' truths as my own.
Live in the moment in a purposeful mindful way.
I want to continue to develop my meditation practice in the coming year. I want to live more and more in the moment, awake and aware. I want to keep this mind: death is certain, but the hour of our death is uncertain, therefore, what is the most important thing?
I really don't want to be stressing about money this time next year.
I'd like to stop spilling on myself when I eat. "Slow down" also: "I am inviting you to go deeper, to learn and to practice so that you become someone who has a great capacity for being solid, calm, and without fear, because our society needs people like you who have these qualities, and your children, our children, need people like you, in order to go on, in order to become solid, and calm, and without fear." "EVERY TIME YOU ARE TEMPTED TO REACT IN THE SAME OLD WAY, ASK IF YOU WANT TO BE A PRISONER OF THE PAST OR A PIONEER OF THE FUTURE."
Well, as always I'd like to pay off debt and lose 20 lbs. But, in reality, I'm learning that that all comes in time, and sometimes, not at all...and it's best to just enjoy life as it comes. I'd really just like to be able to take things slow and enjoy it. To nix a bunch of obligations, to just be happy with myself and who I am, regardless of what's going on. I think I'm primed to do that now, because I have a good job, good relationship, and there are no major dramas going on like a family member going to jail and leaving me with their child, a divorce, losing my house, losing a job, trying to survive... Maslow's heirarchy of needs. I am fulfilled in that respect, so now I can just focus on things like...gardening, dinners, movies, the ones I love... I think that's all I want. To just enjoy time with the ones I love. And that is Bryan. I love him so much.
Just. Be. You.
Find boundaries. Be upright. Live honestly. Work hard.
I would like to learn to have more love and compassion for myself. I've spent my whole life believing that I always had to have the answers to everything. I'm now learning to be comfortable being wrong or not know the answer at all.
I would like to be more free of debt-I'm working to pay off my student loans, but I don't want to be spending money just because it feels good or is instant gratification. I want to save and spend wisely. My mom has really helped me focus on what I need to do instead when I'm stressed or struggling with things in my life. I usually want to shop because it's comforting, stress relieving, and makes me feel better, but I need to and I'm working on finding alternative solutions.
I want to get piece of mind relating to religion and I want to figure out if my girlfriend is the girl I am going to Marry. I want to give back more to the community and be less selfish
During the coming year I would like to become progressively more focused -- both in my professional world, and in my family life. Too often I feel like I am only partially present -- my thoughts wander, I become easily distracted. This is primarily true while not actually with someone in direct, 1:1 situations. But rather, during the quiet, in-between moments. As I grow into the future, I want to be more fully present and less prone to internal and external distractions.
I would like to live a healthier lifestyle. Eating better, getting more exercise, learning better ways to deal with stress. Not only is it important for me, but I want to set a good example to my kids. My husband's health has not been good lately, and I hope that we can do this better together. I think it's all about balance, which I know is hard. But I need to make my health a priority. No one else is going to do it for me.
I would mostly like to be a more generous person in the next year. I have always given time and occasionally money to charities, but would like to find more ways to be useful in the community. Not so much have I gotten advice or counsel directly, but by spending time with (and sometimes failing to spend time with) older friends, I have lost them before I was ready. I would hope that in the year ahead I act on being with some of those people who have been important in my life and who have guided me.
I would like to improve my ability to be good to myself. Which seems simple but is one thing that often falls by the wayside when I get stressed or busy or upset (which happens all too often). I have never made it a practice before this year and it will be a practice in the practice for some time to come, perhaps ever so. One of the best pieces of advice I've ever heard on this front was about being kind and patient with yourself as you would be to a loved one.
I'd like my relationship with my husband to be better. I'd like us to be more kind, gentle, caring, and forgiving of each other. One piece of advice I've received that could be helpful: put yourself in the other person's shoes. It's very simple and "easy" but not so straightforward if you've been in a reactive place for a while. I think we're on the right road, we just need to continue in the right direction.
I would like to lower my weight by 15 pounds, exercise more. I will meditate more regularly regardless of my teaching schedule; and I will reduce my client load so as to have more time to exercise and meditate. This means I have to get SL to give me the retirement money so I can survive. ugh.
This goes long with # 6. Simplify!
Work: Speak with greater command mange projects better manage expectations better build trust Personal: be vulnerable (doing it but it's safe so is it really?) relationship with food and exercise doing more good for the world Kelly says write down all the shoulds-->reframe as woulds-->check it-->if true, what can I do to make that happen? humility, honesty, integrity. I feel I have clarity, finally. Isn't that what I've been seeking so badly for so many years? It's not all there but I know more and more who I am and what feels good and true. and pleasurable.
Not to take the life we have for granted and to touch bases with those who this last year I was not as close as I now feel I would like to be.
I think that the best and most important piece of advice I've received over the past year is that strangers are just friends who I have not met yet. This is important to me in two respects. First, it is a reminder of the warmth and compassion with which I must receive those around me. A smile versus a frown goes a long way; giving someone the benefit of the doubt is vital to making connections that I would not have necessarily expected to make. Further, it is a reminder to never undervalue the deep complexity, importance, and, above all, the humanity of every single person around me. Too often, I find myself viewing myself as a protagonist operating with other, less dimensional characters around me. This, of course, could not be further from the truth. I want to be more compassionate and empathetic this year. I want to remember that each and every person around me is just as complex and just as human, with as many hopes, dreams, fears, passions, concerns, and thoughts as myself. In doing so, I can be better to those around me, and kinder to myself.
I would like to improve my life by working on my self-discipline and contentment when it comes to my finances. I want to step out of my shell more and confidently work and expand my business. I want to continue working on my happiness and my relationship with the Lord. I want to not be discouraged in my teaching career and continue to fine tune my craft. A piece of advice that I have read and adopted for the year is to 'let my pile of good things grow'.
I continue to grow in self-confidence. It is the touchstone for so many areas of my life where I see greater potential. Socially. Professionally. Relationally. Entrepreneurally. I would like to develop further in how I approach and handle being invited to events and parties. I want to have a more solid standing when I go into work and interact with coworkers. I know I have the capacity to communicate authentically and mindfully about my needs and my truth with someone I am growing close to. I see myself owning my business and putting myself out there in ways that currently terrify me. I need to be heard. Being heard is half my responsibility. It's about my voice - how I engage with others. Am I apologetic for who I am? I am afraid of upsetting people or instigating their judgement. I expect a great deal of myself. Yin and Yang - making mistakes and growing into myself are an essential part to being human and living in the world. It is okay to have things to work on, because the work never ends. 50/50. Grace.
I would like to be less focused on physical pain. I hope to identify the root cause of my current lower back pain and have found a way to feel less fragile. Regardless of what I am able to physically improve, I hope to find a way to manage my neck and back pain while making it a less consuming aspect of my daily existence.
Really thinking about doing some more spiritual work. Perhaps volunteerism or charity. Mission trips. Change up my work
I like to be an expert in something. Whatever. And I want to be famous or popular in my area.
I would like to make much more art, to have a regular routine for making art. I would like to meditate more and be involved at the Zen Center in practice.
omg, please give me the strength, one more time to take good care of my body and appreciate my health, please please let me use my wisdom as I know it should be used I so clearly see how this ends as I watch my parents who are in great shape deteriorate in both small and large ways
Such a heavy question, hard for me to answer. I think I'd like to work on having faith that things will work out and reduce my anxiety.
I want to be a more complete person. I know that it's vague but I feel that I've made a great start after the Quest and I can make significant progress. Here's a quote I'm going to use to support me, "When your determination changes, everything else will begin to move in the direction you desire. The moment you resolve to be victorious, every nerve and fiber in your being will immediately orient itself toward your success."
I would like to make improving my health an integral part of my day-to-day routine. I want to take working out and eating healthy more seriously than I do this year. I used to run 5km consistently twice every week but it has gone all over the place this year because I struggle finding balance between my day job, side hustle and long distance relationship. No regrets though, I don't find them limiting to my life, I only need to improve myself better so I can conquer each of these aspects of my life and not let my health slide away. And Rahul has been talking about ensuring us eating healthy too (he's a lot more vegetarian than I am and less of a sugar person) and I think it's only natural that we start looking after well-being if we want to succeed in our relationship and life in general.
I would like to take more of a stand for myself. No advice really captures this, but my mum did always say that "no one will blow your trumpet" meaning that if you want to make a noise, then YOU have to do it.
I would like to find a community that I can belong to, bless and be blessed by.
I've been telling my daughter the story about the bird wearing down the mountain by sharpening it's beak against it every thousand years, slowly reducing it's size. It's a powerful description for the slow passage of time, and the "length of eternity". I have been using it as a metaphor when talking to her about parenting. Each time we interact it's as though I am sharpening my beak against her, trying to shape her into a functioning person. In the end I want her to be happy, and to have a good life, but the process of getting there isn't necessarily fun for either of us. Anyway I keep telling her to be a talc mountain rather than a diamond one. I'd like to follow that advice myself this year. To learn what people try to teach me, and not fight chang so much.
i want to live in the discovery of life. i always say it and read quotes about it and think in some ways i do it but i really want to live knowingly. i want to live in the moment of experience and make sure to appreciate things in a way that i have not done. i want to have a vision of a future that would make me happy and i want more genuine smiles.
I think I am headed in the right direction already. Spend less money; spend more time. Be thoughtful in how I use my resources -- including myself. Make memories rather than buying stuff. I just need to continue in this vein, and try to improve upon the things I have been working toward.
Besides being a better listener for my wife (as mentioned in Question 6), I would like to regain some of my assertiveness and drive for my career. It hasn't been necessary for me to be so driven regarding my academic achievements over the past few years, but I am now in a research setting that can be very competitive. I don't ever want to be caught up in getting ahead that I get consumed in my career. I'm a scientist, and while I want to nurture my assertiveness, I want to still retain my natural curiosity about the world around me and my love of doing science for science's sake. I think during the first few weeks of my new job my new supervisor (who is in a very prestigious position that she had to work hard to get) said something like, "this stuff is never more important that family or your own life".
How many good pieces of advice and counsel I've received this past year. The following lessons are those I'd like to incorporate more fully into my life so as to move balance, compassion, and love more actively within my self. 1. Feel through: My therapist Erin consistently says, "Feel through, Joanne. Feel through. Know that feelings are normal, and that they're going to pass." Allow the feelings to move through my mind and body, from my head, sweeping through my heart and gut, and out my feet. Feel them - and let them go. 2. Move mindfully: My dear friend and colleague, Alexis is a trauma-informed yoga instructor. By encouraging in-body, embodied movement and breathing, she helps folks sink into their bodies, feel their bodies, and become unstuck. Her practice is to move your body - it needs loving movement - AND do to so mindfully. Yes, long runs, energetic spin class, or sweaty hikes can be amazing for mind and body, but they're only one component of a balanced practice. This year I need to move my body more. It's how I'll keep my stress and blood pressure low, my mind and thoughts open, my sleep regular, and my health improving. But, I can't just move through - I have to stop and quietly move within - move mindfully. 3. It's not all or nothing: I hear this from my mum and dad. Likely also from my therapist and my spouse. I struggle with all-or-none thinking and I hear it come out my mouth often. I get defensive and go to "always, never, and interpretations of people's words that seem like I'm being attacked. I need to remember that everyone - especially my spouse - is doing the best they can AND with good intentions. Remembering this will do wonders for my relationships with others, with my self, and will help keep my heart positive. 4: C = MD: My department chair, Paul, noted the best piece of advice he received on his first day of medical school: "C = MD." In my case, B = Ph.D. and as my PhD Director, Clea notes, "Your classes aren't your priority. No one looks at your grades with a Ph.D." This year, as I ease into being a student, I will keep reminding myself that A grades are not the goal. Understanding the content is. Applying the content in my assistantship and independent research it. But grades? They're not important.
Wherever you are, whatever you do; be in love.
Spend time with Yeshua first every morning and thru the day. Read His word and make private time with Him. Listen. Observe the feasts. And all His mitzvahs do it out of love not law. Be proactive when it comes to flying. Think PIC. Create my cattery biz and have it be a success beyond.measure. also have helicopter animal rescue biz and have it not only bring in massive income but save many lives.
Continued healthy living attitude: Daily meditation, regular exercise and good eating habits. Taking the time to take care of me is important way to start each day. I hope that my healthy living habits is a light to others and attracts like thinkers, coming together to support each other living healthier lives.
Something that I would like to improve myself is to my stuff together. Quit being a procrastinator, get my personal health in check. A piece of advice that I hear people tell me a lot and should go by is to live my life like there is no tomorrow. Just to love life to it's fullest and I think lately i have just been doing stuff I normally wouldn't. But I still would like to improve myself more.
I need to become a better manager/leader. The advice, received from my partner and friend Will, that I believe will guide me in the right direction is to pay more attention to the little details and not worry so much about perfecting the big picture.
I want to be more intentional with my heart. I want to let people in but listen to my gut. I want to be hurt less. And I want to love more.
Money. I need to handle my money better; part of it is tied in to the impulse control I'm learning to rein in a bit. Quitting drinking helped. For instance, tonight I'm in bed by 12:30 instead of still at Harvest House trying to make a connection of some sort and spending all my money and hoping that Jason Lee thinks I'm cool by not trying too hard to chat. *also, stop the celebrity worship. Yes, it's exciting but he is a Scientologist and left his wife via letter because he's in so deep. 25 years now man. But I want to move and travel and fix up my car then get a better car one day. And all of that requires money. So I'm in the process still of minimizing, letting go, and saving. As I say this, I have under $100 available. Way under. Working on it. With money comes the move. I want to get into comedy, really try and study and go for it.
One thing I hope to improve about myself is to re-dedicate more of my time to growing Jewishly. I really miss that part of my life. Another thing I hope to improve is to continue to find ways to exercise and eat healthy. I like feeling my body getting stronger and faster, and I want to continue to do that.
Another round of knee shots to bolster them will get me on a bike and better able to walk. I'd like to get back to a no sugar and no gluten and no extra fat. I feel better, look better and know it's better for my heart.
Do something to improve myself every day. Broadly construed.
As I grow older, I notice that I am forever changing. While I still remain imaginative, rational, thoughtful, and loyal, I hope to improve some of the more minor traits that I harbor but don't always express. I want to be more loving and vulnerable - that is a part of me that has only just been expressed as the walls that I had built up since senior year of high school begin to come down. I want to be braver - to challenge myself and hold myself accountable for my actions. I feel like that is the most difficult thing for many people to do. The best guidance I have recieved this year is a phrase that I have heard my entire life, but never really understood the meaning of: lo lefached klal. While my friend Alyssa brought this to my attention, it is the friends I've made in Israel and the experiences I've had that have solidified this motto: don't be afraid of anything. Everything that has held me back in terms of love and success is fear, and if I conquer this, I can do anything.
I'd like to work on my spending and finance and really get stuff together. This year is my first year without a safety net for that, and it's scary. I've gotten plenty of advice regarding that from Kate and Amey, but I've ignored a lot of it. This year is going to be where I have to start paying attention, and I wish I had earlier. I also want to have a good healthy relationship with Justin. I want to not be too dependent and I want to be my best for him, because I really feel like this is a good thing for me, and I worry that I am not healthy enough to make it work. And I want to get a new job in my field or at least at something that's not mind-numbingly boring and move out of the gross apartment I am in. I hope that happens. Remember Simplex, future me. And please don't be working fast food or broke and homeless somewhere.
I want to get comfortable with other people being uncomfortable. I want to live in radical honesty and deep communication about myself and with others. Don't take things personally! Don't be afraid to share your vulnerable self!
I'd like to be less self-critical. Beating myself up for simple human foibles is the one problem that brings me the most misery.
I would like to be a little more assertive. I feel I am generally fairly assertive, though it fails me a bit when I feel threatened, am fearful, or just really value others' perspectives. I do have desires, wants and needs of my own, obviously, though as is common for my personality they are very easily overlooked. This is often in favour of someone else's, and I find it hard to know how far to prioritise my own objectives. In terms of advice, Anne suggested I view options (small and large) as 'what would I find energising?' This is a helpful framework for me as I find it a little less subjective, which gives me a more solid basis for making decisions.
I'm staying in my own lane and not interfering in people, places or things that aren't my business. I'm working on my boundaries in all areas of my life--my partner, my workplace, my boss, my mother, and with new people. I'm asking for help when I need it. I'm asking for what I need. I'm feeling my feelings. I'm letting this sit rather than reacting. I'm living my life one day at a time. Future tripping doesn't get me far; it spins me out of control, into anxiety and depression. So, one day at time is as far reaching as I'm willing to go.
In the next year, I would like to improve how I handle stress. I have said this year after year, but as I move on to a new stage in my life, I think it's time to take responsibility. This year, I was told not to be afraid of what others think. I believe that if I worry less about others and refuse to let their opinions play a factor in my thought process, the stressor becomes less intense. However, my belief and my actions are not always connected. I guess I will have to give it a try in 5776.
The more you face your fears, the less scary they become. Don't hide, push yourself because you are capable. You proved this by getting everything together to get a job and move across the country.
Staying healthy: that's the biggest goal. Do something physical every day: that's the key.
Although I am fairly independent already I would really like to use this year to work on that even more. I can't live in parents house forever and it's time to start living my life.
Equanimity: not to celebrate the goods or mourn the bads too much.
Work harder but don't be so hard on yourself. Does that make sense? Take care of yourself when you should but don't cry about stuff you don't have to.
I'd like to achieve happiness despite circumstances. You know how some people are completely unbothered, not stressed, and just seem to radiate life and love and happiness? I want to cultivate and maintain that mindset over the next year. I desperately want to relinquish my need for control. Over conversations. Over people. Over my family. I truly want to live the idea that my world, my ideas, my feelings are just one possibility of many, and show a greater level of respect for other people. I want love. I want to experience being totally, completely in love with and trusting of another person. I want to experience pure happiness in another person's presence. I want laugh and joke and play with another person nonstop. I want butterflies that don't die. I don't know how to get there, but I'm open to that in a way I wasn't before.
I hope I stay grounded. That I'm able to work toward my life goals with a firm plan and not fly off on a fancy or whim. I'd like to be able to envision what I want to do and the person I want to be and make a solid steps to get there.
No. I would like to be healthier, but that's very unlikely to happen.
I'd like to continue to work on my health. I'd like to be stronger and more fit. I'd also like to meditate more. Every day for 15 minutes can be incredibly helpful. Advice: Be gentle with yourself.
I'd like to make some real progress in paying down debt and putting money into savings. One piece of advice that could help guide me is to "pay" myself first by putting money away before I pay anything else.
As I am getting older, I think of all the things I haven't done, or the things that I do, that will make me more productive. I want to be more active, see more, do more, at home and out in the world. I haven't received advice or counsel, but I see what I am missing out there.
In each difficult or wonderful moment - surrender it to God. And remember that I am not my circumstances. My circumstances do not define me.
I want to better be able to control my anger. The last few weeks I've just felt increasing amounts of spite, rage, pettiness, smugness, etc. I've wanted to be mean, and in some ways, I have been. I have to admit that. I want to follow through with things more. I'm actually doing a lot better on that... last year I would put myself at a 2, now I'll say i'm at about a 5. Still have a ways to go, though. I just need to remember that doing it is easier than not doing it. Feelings aren't fact.
I'd like to continue becoming a more respectful parent. It's really hard to reflect and talk about feelings every time something happens, but I want to work on that, especially as Aurora gets older. Connecting instead of punishing feels right, and I hope it continues to work for our family.
I'd like to have the Fruits of The Spirit Evident in my life,Especially, more self-control, but Most of All,Agape
I'd like to feel more centered and grounded in my work. I'd also like to release some of the anxiety and stress of not making enough money. I'm not sure this is advice or if I received it, but I think that getting on the same page as my spouse about money will help.
Would seriously like to get rid of my Dad-Bump.
Put my body first. Years of struggling with disability, health challenges, and moving have resulted in more pain and being overweight and sluggish. This year I prioritise exercise, streching, reiki, bodywork, healing my disability in all ways I can, and caring for my body in all the ways I can. I pray for ease and flow with this. Amen
This coming year, I aspire to interact with my self and the world from a place of compassion and mindfulness. I did a powerful visualization this year to meet my highest guiding force. In the meditation, I saw her as a beautiful water goddess who irrigates a fragrant garden for all to enjoy. Her name is Mariah, and she was dressed in aqua, pink and purple, bits of green. She was sparkly like a lotus floating above a leafy pond. A flower crown upon her head, perfumed air trailing behind, she was serene and solid, generous and witty. This year, it's gonna be all about embracing the Divine Feminine inside this lifelong tomboy. Bring on the ruffles!
Continue working on being motivated by positive possibilities, not fear.
I would like to live somewhere in a community of caring people.
More physically active and fit. Filling the purpose (s) God has for me, especially follow through. Dependability, on time. MY HOUSE A HOME....FELLOWSHIPING KISS KEEP IT SIMPLE SAINTS!
Let go of stress is the message of those who are guiding me. My goals and I am working on them now are control diabetes. Get blood pressure under control. Remember you are only 4 points from the great number for cholesterol. This is within your power. Loose weight. You are working on that that now and lost 7 pounds. My goal will be to loose another 30-35 pounds by next spring. This is doable. My main improvement is focus on these goals. Do not be distracted by anything. Let go of the See's candy dream. That dream is not a good dream for me. RETHINK.
The first thing that comes to mind is to just allow who I am to be uncovered and experienced. Deb told me on one of my first visits with her that Seth's journey is his....and perhaps I get to expand that into a sense of not being responsible for anyone else's journey....
I need to stop being so sensitive and I need to learn to trust my partner more. I wish sometimes I could be like the Buddhist monk in this story that Dr. Stenger told in class once, but I have a long-ass way to go.
Keep smiling Eat breakfast and lunch Take the stairs Put yourself out there Be compassionate and patient Keep breathing
I don' t particularly think that I need any improvement, other than continuing to learn and grow wherever I can.
I want to get my things done, be more efficient and get more structure within my daily life. I want to improve my knowledge of languages I started to learn in the past. Advice to Self: Just do it, don't wait till another day, forget about your fears - the fears will forget you then.
I want to be kinder, to continue to improve on being the best person I can be.
I'd like to be more disciplined-- everything is so out of control right now- unemployment, living with parents, no kid-- and rather than control what I can control, I've let everything spiral away- from eating habits, exercise habits, sleep habits...all the things that lead to a healthy, well adjusted life. I hope to regain control of these things-- regardless of the job, housing and baby situation. If i'm going to be a parent, I need to model positive behaviors so I need to regain my grip on these. Advice or counsel....well, control what you can control. And be kind to yourself. I'm not that good at either but I'll work on it.
Reflect every night on the day and determine how tomorrow I can be a stronger, kinder, better person. "Don't just move forward, move upward."
I'd like to find more balance in my life. This year has been all about single-minded focus on a goal (which was worthy) but next year I need to make sure I can keep up my progress while still having time to spend with people who are important to me, as well as solo time for reading, napping, watching movies, and goofing off. I can't remember the last book I read, which is depressing.
Find balance in what's peaceful. Peace = balance to me and it's always been a tenuous experience to find it. I'm still working on it. But I'm getting better and only doing what feels right and good to me and forgetting all the rest.
There is so much I could say here and so much that I could achieve or be disappointed about next year. I would like to improve myself by utilizing this upcoming internships to really gain marketable skills. I want to keep busy and figure out a job that will satisfy me and bring home money. I want to find someone to care for. it's weird but I know I need that. it's just the way a woman feels. that's why I think i'm so looking for a non-profit job. I think that if I had some other purpose I would be more ok with working for a for profit
I would like to be nicer to my husband. I watched a couple nag their 10-year-olds nonstop & thought, I don't want to sound like that. And worried that I did. So I stopped. I really did.
Let go. Accept. Forgive. Move on. Let go again. Acceptance really does help and not creating expectations. Worry is a prejudice against the future.
Stop caring too much about what other people think. It's OK to stand your ground, and if someone hates you for it, that's fine. You'll still be friends.
I would like to regain physical strength after having been diagnosed with COPD and taken to my bed in despair. My daughter advised me that if I don't, she will come home, move in, take over, and roust me out of my stupor and kick me out of my bed. It really is not daughterly advice. It is a promise.
Make time for other people. Being a recluse is not good for yourself, and people want you around (or at least that is what they say). Also being around other people, in general feels better than wallowing alone.
I want to really feel life and continue to take down my walls. There is no piece of advice that will help me in this quest. It is all about trust.
In the coming year, I would like to be fully confident in myself, my abilities, my trajectory, and my loved ones. I have continued moving forward in leaps and bounds but I have quite a distance to go. Don told me earlier, while dealing with Leila's emotional upheaval, that I am incredible at dealing with external issues on a separate and distant level which allows me to think things through logically. When it comes to my own issues however, I become entangled in my own path and keep myself from successfully navigating the issue. I still have trust issues, intimacy and care issues, but by stepping outside like I would for someone else' issues, I will be able to raise my happiness even higher
From Parks and Recreation: "treat yo'self". And also from Dr Emily Michelson: make every effort to change, not just superficial things but look to the depths of why you are doing bad things. But also, don't change the essence of your being"
I want to take myself less seriously. I have such terrible anxiety about everything around me. I hate not feeling good enough. I hate feeling like I'm messing up. I have a terrible knack for constantly feeling out of control, my job gets away from me, my social life is getting away from me. But it's NOT! I need to start being less serious about having my life together and set by age 25. I'm only 24, but I have so much time to figure it out. I want to start being more serious about the things i LOVE, not the things i DO.
Trust and Faith in the journey. Follow your heart every time. Do not lie to yourself. Believe in yourself. Trust yourself. Breathe. Relax and have fun.. Make time for it. It's so very important. Love your kids daily in all ways. Thank them for the opportunity to parent them and be a student of them. Stay open. Face fear and act anyway. Love yourself. Care for yourself. Slow the fuck down.
I would like to be more loving. I would like to have people in my life who give me good counsel and support.
I would like to live my life as a more positive person. I want to recommit my life to "relentless positive action." When faced with choices, I always try to "do the right thing." It is not always difficult to figure out what to do. The best counsel I received in the last year, from Boots, was that during difficult times, there will be people in life who stand by you and others who will move out of the way without ending you a hand. Those in the latter category are just looking out for their own interests, and worried about their own careers, mortgages, and lives. That is only natural. Forgive those people and move on. But the ones who stand by you when you are at your darkest place, those are the ones you should hold on to for the rest of your life.
I have no idea. I need to find a better work/wife/mom balance. I keep saying that but it's true. I guess... take one day at a time and don't quit on your worst day.
Be myself. Honor my value. Challenge my own conception of the world. Tap into my intuition. Be of service. I'd really love to grow in my self-confidence and self-worth. To own my talents and allow them to flow through my life, relationships, and work.
I suppose this links into my answer of the last question. I want to improve myself creatively and socially. I know I can do socialising if I put my mind to it. The problem is that I never do that. I don't put my mind to it. I don't make the time. To reach the next level, professionally, creatively and personally, I need to branch out, meet people, network, laugh, love and build friendships in a genuine way. I need to foster better self discipline. Mine is terrible. It has to be better. I need it for every aspect of my life, I need it for my health, my creativity, my weight, my appearance, my housework. Everything. It is better. But it could be much improved.
Lose some more weight. Improve my language skills. Improve my dancing. Becoming a caring person. Full stop.
I would like to move closer to work so we don't spend much time in commuting every day and enjoy our life and work more. I wish my past self was more self-confident and risked a bit more.
I want to be more creative and have better boundaries.
I would like to invrease my personal agency and make things happen instead of waiting around. Put my hat in the ring.
I want to be humble, to think of myself less and others more. I want to be content with what is. I want to simplify my life, release the things I do not need to make room for those that I do. I want to live like HINENI, here I am.
FDPD! Ian already starting. I received this piece of advice from Wayne Hoffman through his book "Mind Candy". It was motivating on a level which I could envision achieving my goals, not just dreaming about them. FDPD stands for feel, define, plan and do. This I believe will be a piece of advice that I will carry with me throughout the next year and hopefully throughout my life. I believe that this program will help to guide me and give me a plan on moving forward, it supplies structure. I hope to improve myself in the sense that I put my ideas and goals into action and actively get what I want.
I would like to work on having more patience, both with others and with myself. Everyone has so many things going on. Remembering this, remembering that I may be the center of my universe, but I am far from the center of the universe, will help ease tensions in my relationships and interactions. And to be patient with myself, I must accept my flaws and make every effort to improve, simultaneously recognizing that it is a long process.
I want to improve my piano chops... Learn at least two pieces from the four major periods of classical piano literature.
I always want to improve myself and often by putting that pressure on myself I try too hard to get everything right at once and easily feel as though I've failed since I haven't met all the goals I've set for myself. This causes me to relapse into patterns I'm not happy with because I quickly and lazily decide: there's no point, I'll never get anything right. So that is something I always struggle with. What I want to learn most of all is how to set myself achievable goals, to give myself a realistic chance to improve and to be better at forgiving myself for not getting something right immediately so that I don't fall into the trap of: oh, I'll never manage, I can just give up and be a lazy loser slob... (Which is liberating for a short moment, then frustrating and depressing) Useful advice that's been given to me the past year: - Baby steps and with courage, don't doubt yourself (my mother) - don't try to do too much and too perfectly, stick to a few tasks and give them all you've got without exhausting yourself (by myself to myself) - pace yourself, think of yourself as a marathon runner, not someone who tries to win a short race (by myself to myself) - focus, discipline, less is more, stick to a few talents and make the most of them, make a decision for one kind of profession, stop always looking for new challenges in new fields, stop facebooking so much (my ex) - always stay true to yourself (old journalist lady, random encounter) - don't be so hard on yourself (coach lady) - you've proven so much already what you're good at, work with that, present it well, make sure that people see what you've done, go out there confidently and ask for jobs you'd like to have, don't make yourself smaller than you are (my dear friend)
Be present and attentive to the people and things around you: see them as they are in that moment, not as you would wish them to be or as they have been in the past. The past and the future are inaccessible to you; nothing else is real.
I will like to achive succes. Succes for me will be selling my desings. Selling in stores. Having my own store. Yes!
In the next year I want to get my body healthier. I have set a goal of being 260lbs, and I also want to be more financially stable. I have a goal of paying off my first student loan by my first wedding anniversary.
Brandon will sometimes tell me when he loves me to "trust that" I guess to not doubt what he says. it's so hard to believe that someone as wonderful as him could love a crazy woman like myself. I would love to learn patience and doubt myself and our relationship less. i also would like to be in a better place mentally and emotionally with the whole "Miranda" situation. I'd like to ignore all the negative involving her and focus more on the positive side to forming an even deeper relationship with the girls. I would also like to be making more money!
I want to procrastinate less. And to be more confident.
If you were being unreasonable, what would you do?
Spend more time with my wife and sons, and laugh more and learn to just be.
Goodness...I want to continue to be a better father and better husband. I want to continue to find success in my new ventures in my professional world. The advice I have received this year has been in the form of real cautionary tales that illustrate what is important. Family, friends, health.
In the next year I would like to make progress in my efforts at weight loss. I would also like to see improvements in my stamina and flexibility.
i want to be healthier. i want to be nicer i want to attract more friends. maybe yoga advice, no other that i'm aware of - just to be.
This next year I hope I push myself to grow. I hope to believe in myself more. Even if I am not sure I will succeed, I hope I try more. The advice I have received has come from my friends and family. They keep telling me to try to do big things. They know I can do it and I should know it too. I need to jump more.
I am trying to work on being more patient and less controlling. Since my fiancé moved in with me, I've noticed some less "savory" characteristics in my attitude that are worse than I thought they were! In the coming year, I would like to work on not interrupting people quite so much which I have gotten better at but still do on occasion. I also think need to work on not using words like "should" or "need to" as in telling someone that they should or need to do, say or act a certain way. My therapist told me that just because I may think, say or act a certain way doesn't necessarily mean that another person would and it's not fair for me to assert my way of doing things or my dominance on them. It was a big wake up call for me but I guess you could say it's a process and I am working on it but hopefully by this time next year, I will be a much better me!
Practice asking more questions instead of spouting uninformed opinions or dictating answers.
I am too quick and too slow to react in certain situations. I want to focus on fine tuning my judgement when challenging situations occur. I would also like to manage stress better and show it less so I seem cooler under pressure than I am actually feeling.
A bad day doesn't equal a bad life, which is really hard to remember when you're in the middle of the day and it seems like your entire life is falling apart. If I'm ever thinking that whatever I'm struggling with isn't worth it anymore, I hope that I have the wisdom to sort out my priorities or the strength to push through.
I would like to love myself more, as I am, and have even more confidence in my decisions and intuition. I feel that this has definitely improved since last year, but I would like to achieve even more confidence, which I believe will lead to less stress and more peace. There have been many great pieces of advice that have led me here, and I should like to compile them in a list so I can read it every morning if I have to, to remember not to be hard on myself! I would also like to stop comparing myself and my life and activities with those I see on Instagram. I became totally addicted to that stupid thing, and I started wishing I had a much different life, because I was following users who showed pictures of ways of life that I held as ideals but do not currently possess. I started becoming increasingly depressed and upset with myself and my choices, and it's ridiculous! I have a great life! And yes, I could have made other choices and be living a different life right now, but I didn't, and I'm not! I really want to let that go and appreciate the life I have at the pace I live it. I want to be more thankful for what I've got and not yearn so much for what I've not.
I always want to improve. And I want to accept who I am. I do to a great extent, but still hope for people to like me.
Learn to say no. Especially learn to say no to friends.
Self care. I want to eat, drink and be more merry. I want to dance more and laugh more.
I would like to be more trusting in my intuition, whether it is for my professional or personal life. In my 10Q answers from last year, I was pleasantly surprised by the intuition and instinct I had. I need to continue to trust myself and listen to my heart. The exercise of self-reflecting can reveal the most honest advice and wisdom.
I have to regain my health and lower my weight, and begin to travel again as the upcoming trip provides me with focus. I also have to remind myself to listen to my own advice to younger people to really smell the coffee and appreciate that "its the journey" which should bring most of my joy. WOW last year focus on clutter which is at least in gear. Must continue weekly purge year around to keep stuff going out of the house and only bring in what has been needed to replace what is purged, and not all of that needs to be item for item.
I would like to spend less time stuck and ruminating, and more time in action. I repeatedly remind myself that taking action leads to feeling better, not the other way around. I've been using the method of just doing one little thing, and then another and another. Or setting a timer, 20 minutes of productivity, 10 minute break, or 45/10 or 60/15 or whatever. Anything to get myself moving forward.
I would like to be healthier. I want to get my veggie intake way up, my movement way up, my outdoor time way up. Advice or council that could guide me? I heard this great podcast about the benefits of wandering aimlessly, walking without destination or goal. It is great for your body and mind. Like 1/2 a ritalin and 1/2 a vallum in one, the guy said. That is some good council. That is a life goal. Wander.
I would like to know how to read Hebrew, and to be as fit as I was December 2014
be nicer? (Jack) Pace myself!
I hope to lose weight, get rid of my acne and mainly just stop being so awkward. Also focus on my grades a ton.
I want to live each moment as it is and not be consumed with what will happen in the future or what already happened in the past. I like the quotation "the past has no power over the present moment". I really want to live that.
I want to be more willing to stand up for myself and be able to say to people "No."
be better to the people i love. Don't fight about small things. If i feel that something has hurt my feelings, i should really think when and if it is worthwhile to bring up. Because mostly you need to let it go. Being happy and a "bigger" person is usually what is in your own best interest.
Be true to myself, be good to myself, and live one day at a time. If something isn't working, reflect on it and change it as needed.
I want to maintain my sense of self, my values, and not speak ill of anyone or enable others to speak ill. I do not want to lose myself, I do not want to feed into lashon harah. I want to be someone that people can trust. I want to be safe, and I want to be a good influence / model on the people around me. I would also like to be able to let go, to trust others, so that I can step back and allow things to pass by or over me. Things don't have to be perfect all the time. Things can be late. Things can not happen despite a promise that they will. Things can be put aside if the energy going into them will not be returned.
I would like to live more like my son. He gave me the best piece of advice by living his life "in the moment". Jason, you are amazing my son. You had no idea that your actions were under observation during the first year of your life. and you have taught me more about life in this past year then 15 years of schooling did for me. "It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad." C. S. Lewis My son, every day was a new awakening for you and for me. every morning when you woke up and I saw you smile, I knew this day was the day you would fly. Each day you hatched and flew. With reckless joy, pride, and happiness you took wing. You did not seek to overcome a difficulty because there was no obstacle, just the wide open sky. You helped me fly again. I love you.
Such a simple question but so complex at once. I want to improve myself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Physically, I want to strengthen my body - my back, my core, my shoulders. I want to push the limits of what I think I can accomplish physically. I want to engage myself in activities that will challenge me - hiking, biking long distances, and some rigorous traveling. Mentally, I want to become sharper. I feel like I have forgotten the art of mental strengthening and education. I want to learn new things about life and "reality" and understand them deeply. Emotionally, I want to let go of those fears that continue to paralyze me. I want to feel deeply again. I want to let down my walls and let the love come in. This means strengthening those friendships that I value and care for. Spiritually, I am going to zen. I want to learn reiki, further delve into my yoga practice, and harness the endless love and light within me. I want to trust in my spirit and let if flow.
I want to become harder working, more diligent, more organized. I am the biggest impediment to my own success. That also carries over to how kind I am to mom-- I need to be kinder, because even on a selfish level, guilt is a burden... and my own disorganization and dissatisfaction with myself is sometimes something I take out on her by being rough or grumpy. I don't know if there's specific advice-- I've heard a lot of wise sayings over the year. But I absolutely have learned the value of hard work, and learned what I am capable of when I apply myself to it. Be strong, be tough, fight tooth and nail for what you want, don't waste any moment. Jewish values are also not a bad thing to follow. Someone at the JCF this year called anonymously to say they loved my paper and I have a "flair" for writing, and he hopes I'll keep doing it. I didn't get the prize, but it meant a lot to hear that. He told me to "write with a pair of scissors." That I'm too wordy. This is true, and I think this applies to the above as well, more broadly. Cut out what is unnecessary. Organization, succinctness, dedication and single-mindedness, focus... these are so important.
Build up my understanding that I am a beatiful, worthy person without needing a partner to tell me so.
I'd like to pay more attention. I think this is the great objective of the human condition - to do things on purpose, with intentionality. Stilgoe talks about this a lot in class and I've heard it elsewhere too. Do things on purpose. Look closely. Know why you're doing the things you're doing, and interrogate how they uphold your values. You can't afford not to.
I want to stop being passive aggressive. I've improved, tried to become more aware, but it's not enough. Being passive aggressive fuels depression. Depression is anger turned inward. I've reflected on past behavior, past mistakes-- okay, I've obsessed about them (yes, working on that too) and feel shame at some of my unintentional mean girl things I've done. I'm too easily influenced by "friends"-- I believe their perspective, go along with their beliefs and then find out I was wrong. I've played my part as a recruited troll. Even though I haven't set out to hurt someone, "unintentional" hurts just as much as intentional. I saw a TED Talk by Julian Treasure that made an impact: 1. Don't speak ill of someone not present. Stop gossiping. I'm bad about this. It's passive aggressive and I need to break the habit. Sometimes I feel ashamed after I participate in this behavior. 2. Judging. It's hard to listen to someone if you know you're being judged. 3. Negativity. People don't want to listen to negativity. Lorna has pointed this out. Sometimes I feel attacked (she could work on her delivery :-), like she's finding fault with me, but often times she's right. Fighting negativity will help alleviate depressive symptoms. 4. Complaining. Bitching. Complaining is viral misery. 5. Excuses. Some people have a BLAME THROWER. I'm pretty good about taking responsibility for my work-related actions, but I need to examine where I make excuses in my personal life. 6. Exaggeration and lying. I don't think I have a problem with this-- I don't make up stuff, and I'm a terrible liar (something I take pride in), but I can be dramatic and catastrophize. 7. Dogmatism. My way or the highway. The confusion of facts with opinions. When the two are conflated it's hard to listen. For example, I hate it when over-the-top religious zealots try to preach to me. I'm wrong. My point of view is not valid since my filter is not Christ. I am guilty of overdoing it with the GMO/tree hugger/nature thing. I want to learn how to let people have their beliefs and not judge. Remember HAIL H: Honesty. Being straight and clear in what you say. A: Authenticity. Be yourself. Stand in your own truth. I: Integrity. Be your word. Do what you say, be trustworthy. L: Love. Wish people well. If you're wishing someone well, it's very hard (impossible) to judge them at the same time.
I would love to lose all the extra weight I can't seem to stop gaining. There are so many areas I would love to improve. I'm a bit of a self-improvement junkie. After reading the Deciding Decade, I feel this weight of this stage of my life, a time to make something, be something, do something. It is motivating, because who I making myself to be right now is who I am going to be for the rest of my life. And I just want to work hard now, to learn to work hard, and to take advantage of how much time I have. I definitely have an ideal for what I will be in a year, but I would like to focus my energy and effort into being kind, using my skills to help others rather than improve myself in a million different ways.
I would like, very much, to reach a place in my life where I don't feel full of despair. I wish there was a list of things that I could tick off that would help me reach that place, but there isn't. I've been told that grief, and healing, take time more than anything else. I hope that meanwhile, during this process of healing, I can see a way out of this pall I feel I've gathered around myself.
I need to trust people more. I am much more of a closed off person than I seem, as a result people don't get me to open up all the way because they think I already have. I need to work on not putting up such a strong facade and let my guard down more.
Thanks to my good friend John who said "the best project you can have is yourself". I want to be more loving and forgiving of myself. I know compassion starts with me.
I'd like to be more true to myself. I'd like to work on being able to be honest AND sensitive at the same time. I'd like to honor my gifts more by spending more time growing and sharing them. I'd like to get better at putting my life and my problems aside to be present with others, rather than just sucking others into my world. I want to be a better sister to Guthrie. I want to be a better friend. I want to create a better work-life balance, even when my work aligns with what I want to spend my life doing. I'd like to get better at not being distracted by romance. --- You got this. You've done it before even if you haven't done THIS before. You've made it this far; you can make it farther. There will be ups and downs and yet you will continue not only to survive but to thrive. There will be a thousand disappointments and humiliations and yet life will go on in some sort of arc beyond the disappointments and humiliations. You will feel guilty and then you will realize that you are trying your best and it is okay to screw up sometimes. It's just you being human. You will continually learn from your mistakes, even when it feels like you aren't, and they will continually make you a stronger, better, more humane, compassionate, and loving person. Because that's who you are and how you choose to live, and no mistake is going to change that. You got this.
Maybe I can deconstruct. Destruct. Fall apart. Piece back together. Or keep steady and revisit the silent place where there is truth. "Buck up."
To do and not just sit. To recognize opportunity and to make things possible. To see beyond what could be perceived as obstacles and embrace the things that scare me.
Find a new balance between work and the several aspects of my private life With my parents getting older and frailer, I sometimes feel like my care-free life is over. That my live from now on is going to be dedicated to caring for them. Combine this with sharing my life but not (yet) a home with my love, which entails running back-and-forth between to cities, and having to give in to the needs of his daughter, the feeeling that I'm not paying enough attention to my friends AND sometimes need some time to myself, and you get an impression of the situation. Oh, and then there is work... It's possible to combine them all, I'm sure. I just need to figure out how.
I want to be at a place that makes me happy. Do what makes you happy. Screw everything else.
I would love to find more time to do the things that rejuvenate me and make me healthy. I have made some progress in this area by adjusting my son's schedule at daycare so I can have an hour or so in the afternoon to myself before I pick him up. Unfortunately time is at a premium right now and his needs come first so I think further progress towards this goal will come slowly.
I would like to be in service to The Lord and improve my service to Him by learning and sharing at my church, wise counsel and Partnership from XP Ministries & Apostle/Prophet Patricia King and by training & sharing & membership in WIMN (Women In Ministry Network) of and through The Lord most high. Have received wise advice and counsel through attending training from Patricia King and from wise counsel from dear friends and family in Christ
I have an entire fridge door covered in magnets with advice on. It's the transient year. I'm moving. And I'm shifting life styles completely. Doing this 10Q makes me realise how scared I am of doing this. Like my life of dreaming and then living the dream will end. And then what? There's just this open expanse of a void that I don't know how to fill.... I want children, I want to be in love with some one. But I can't control these things any more than I can control the tide.... So I give up everything I love for; Maybe. Advice: "You'll be fine." "I don't know what it is that's the matter but I have faith in you, you'll be ok." "Try again." "Follow your instinct." "Weren't you the girl who once ran half a marathon just because someone said you could do it? And weren't you the person who ran up the steps of the Great Wall of China just because someone said you couldn't?"
I am interested in how this benefits me, this period of lull (1-3 things to do after work per week) compared to show & wedding prep 3 months of craziness. Honesty being less busy makes me more likely to feel existential. "What's the point?" Or lonely "where's Jon?" I'd like to go to therapy and dig in to my addiction to busy-ness.
I would like to become more tolerant and loving of those who disagree with me. I find myself really bothered by the actions and positions of people with different political beliefs than I have and I get very angry and judgmental. I want to find a way to retain just anger about injustice, but be better about remembering that everyone is human and people are generally coming from a place of good intention. I want to stop being an active part of the divisiveness, without just withdrawing. Any bit of counsel I think I need to know about this is in core teachings of my faith: love your enemy as yourself. Also, something I've thought of myself a little bit this year: Got a problem? Throw more love at it.
I think the last question summed this one up! The piece of advice that I like and go back to relates to climbing - something to the effect of: Just send it. I tend to complicate things, over think things or make things seems a lot more arduous than they are. But things tend to be pretty simple, and taking a step back and stripping things down to their core tends to reveal that. So whatever the problem, just send it. Don't over think it, don't over analyze, trust in your ability, have confidence and just go for it.
I have recieved advice to dedicate less time to my social life and more to my family life and education, I plan to improve those two parts of my life.
I really want to become more confident in myself, with everything I do. I also would like to really increase my work ethic. "Life begins at the end of your comfort zone."
I want to fully accept all of me❤️ It will free me up to join a gym and be stronger physically
I want to sort out the psychotherapy that I desperately need in order to better deal with day to day situations that occur.
I would like to improve my life outside of work, leading to a better work/life integration. I have been sacrificing time spent painting, playing music, going to the gym, calling friends, and participating in Jewish events by working too much, both in Madison and while traveling. I need to renew my commitment to myself. I need to stop working and start doing these activities. I need to go out of my comfort zone and explore other opportunities. Feeling uncomfortable going to a black lives matter rally by yourself? Go! Feeling uncomfortable about going out to a bar at night by yourself? Go! Feeling uncomfortable about going to Hillel by yourself on a Friday night? Go! See what happens! The worst that happens is you go, have a mediocre time, and come home. The best that happens is you have an awesome time and even make a new friend or two! A couple pieces of advice--go outside your comfort zone, that's where the magic happens. Make time for the things that matter, you can always do more work later. Work/life balance isn't a zero sum game and in battle with one another. There is work, intrapersonal, and interpersonal relationships that are all flowing and competing with each other and need to reach a harmony. Find that harmony and enjoy it.
I would like to eat better! live with more purpose and have more fun. The best advice I have gotten lately is to let it go (whatever is stopping or bugging me) and to not let the fear seep in or if it does, go ahead and press on anyway!
Really would like to feel more fundamentally at peace, and continue to explore mindfulness. Not like I need to always be doing something, accomplishing something. I want to feel at ease with exactly what I am doing and the circumstances I am in. Not stress, not worry about decisions I have made or have to make.
I would like to find a better balance between being alone and with my husband, especially while I'm at home. If he's around I want to be around him. Yet I need more alone time than that...and then sometimes I end up being around him when I'm too tired or feeling impatient and I end up being short or otherwise unkind to him. Instead, I could do 20 minutes of yoga and maybe rejoin him for less time - but better time. The problem is when I'm feeling that way, I'm tired...and joining him to watch tv is easier than doing yoga and resetting myself in a healthier way. Maybe the strategy is to tell myself I'll do literally just 5 minutes -- to force that resetting -- and maybe the 5 will turn to longer, or it will simply be enough for me to be my better self for the rest of the evening.
I'd like to feel less harried, less resistance and more in the flow of life. One bit of counsel I've received in the past year is to stay present with all of my feelings that come up. In the past, I have edited myself and bypassed my own emotions because my intellect is telling me why something is the way it is. But uncomfortable emotions don't go away when they are bypassed. It is better to feel them fully, to stay present in the discomfort to help these emotions move on by.
I will continue pushing myself to engage in life after so many years living with the debilitating effects of PTSD.
I would like to be healthier by getting more exercise. After five years of graduate school, sitting and reading and sitting and writing, it is amazing that I can still walk. I need to strengthen my legs like I did in 2011 post knee surgery. I think the same graduate school process that stole my muscular strength also taught me that I can achieve things that seemed impossible by simply going at it day after day. I do not have to yield any longer to the strong message I have always obeyed: to be still, to not get excited, to not move, not sweat, not get dirty... to live in my mind instead of my body. I have satisfied the need to discover what I could do intellectually if I gave it my best shot. Now it is time to give my body some attention and help it grow strong as well.
I need to be more motivated to get things done. I've spent the last year recovering from 5 years of suffering and pain and now I think it is time to let it go and move forward with my life. I have overcome so much and now it is time to reach for my dreams!
A partner. Someone who loves me unconditionally. Someone who holds me when I need support. Someone who moves with me and I move with them as we journey together.
I think I received the advice, though maybe I told it to myself, that there aren't 'right' decisions, so that I need not feel agony over making the 'right' decision. I'd like to practice making decisions more easily and without getting overwhelmed by considerations and choices, and then practice being happy with the decisions I've made, or only checking-in with myself about the results of decisions periodically, not constantly. This goes for decisions about how I spend my time, and other decisions. I basically want to feel less overwhelmed. Some of this might not be up to me, but some of it certainly must be up to me, and I'd like to bolster that decision-making power.
I want to be living the best life I can possibly live next year, in all areas, every day. I think this is going to have to involve giving up alcohol. I realize that it actually took away a lot from my life this year. Being in a hungover daze, or a drunken stupor, does not make me happy, no matter how much I look forward to that first sip. I hope that I continue to use alcohol very little and very carefully in 2016. HSM has been a nice inspiration and accountability support.
I want to stop complaining. People do not want to be around complainers but they also do not want to be around unrealistic optimists. Find that delicate balance between complaining and begin grateful.
It's always my goal to improve myself…physically, mentally, spiritually and socially. I strive... then I settle and even justify... being just who I am. I guess the best mindset is to keep moving forward and not repeating past mistakes. No matter our age or position in this life, we are always a work in progress.
I would like to become healthier and have more energy. I haven't received any particular advice, but all the information is there. I would also like to become more comfortable speaking up for myself. This isn't in a selfish way, but just allowing clearer communication. It is a matter of confidence. I want to be able to take a day off from work without needing to justify it, or feeling guilty if I'm just enjoying that day, for example.
I learned last year to trust myself, my strength and the universe. It's hard, still, to believe in myself. But I want to be stronger, more mature, better (not just harder) working. To really have major physical accomplishments. And for them to all be in a place, studio.
I would like to continue on my path of healthy eating and add more exercise. I also intend to continue surrounding myself with enjoyable and positive people. Stay away from negative thoughts and people. I would like to fill my world (as large as I can make that) with positive energy in the hopes it will grow. The best advice I have gotten in the past year is, "Just walk away." I try to remember that now and plan to follow that as a method of removing negativity from my life, by removing myself from the negative environment whenever possible.
I would like to figure out where my passion truly lies. I like to do a lot of things but narrowing my focus and figuring out where I belong would be nice.
I would like to improve myself by doing things. Just do it. I still think way too much before doing things. Even with buying stuff which leads to me making the wrong choices and leads to moments passing by and me being regretfull. I would rather regret that I did things, than regretting not doing them. I want to let go of fears, let go of uncertainty. And just do it. I think that will also add up to being happy.
I would like to strengthen my internal life over the next year. I had an epiphany recently about why my confidence and 'feeling of belonging' is so compromised. It was an eye opening realization and I am still a little giddy with the opportunity it presents to rebuilding myself internally and moving forward with the next chapter(s) of my life. I think remembering this awareness is the advice/counsel that I will use to guide me over the next year. Working on the poster now (lol)
I would like to live authentically to myself. I think the Myers-Briggs tests I've recently been semi-obsessed with, as well as the knowledge of Ayurveda I've learned in the past year, have led me to the knowledge that I am unique, I have attributes and qualities that others may not understand, but I will do the most and live my best life being me. I should come to know myself not just for the knowledge's sake, but to strive to become more authentically me at every possible opportunity. I'd like to become more organized to get in touch with my J side, more capable of making decisions to get in touch with my T side, more thoughtful and reflective (especially in writing) to get in touch with my I side, more a creator and a thinker to get in touch with my N side. I have all of this within me, but it requires stepping up to the plate and getting more DONE. It's not simply about productivity, it's also about purpose. This past year I did too little. This next year, I'd like to do enough to be a true me.
Was given the advice for the next year to ask questions I want answers to and go after what I want. To take risks. I can only imagine the grounding living in the truth of the moment will provide. Think of it, to be in a room and feel something go awry - wonder if something is what you think it is - and instead of conversing internally just stating I feel something and casually asking if that's mutual.
To let go of fear, experience joy, release anger. I need to base how I feel and how I behave on something other than these reactive places. There is nothing but good advice and tips I've received from all over. Practice gratitude and kindness. Gratitude and kindness. I am a petty sort, and spend a lot if time focusing on what isn't there. Count my blessings. That would be a good, small but powerful, way to start.
I want to my best to not make any news enemies over the next year. I have this ability to offend others not meaning to do so and while they certainly carry some of the fault for choosing to become upset, I would like to do better to be kind in every situation that I find myself in. I was given the counsel along time ago that it was better to be kind than right and also to be harsh on yourself but easy on everyone else. I would really like to incorporate those two sayings in my life. Probably the best counsel I've received this year came from Brother Black just a few days ago when he told me to take the job and marry the girl. Solid advice
Counsel from myself - I need to be less angry, less of a bitch.
I hope to put myself first more. I currently feel that I am giving up to much of what *I* want or need -- and need to make sure that I put those things in my field of view and make them happen if they are truly important to me.
I would love to worry and stress less. I find myself being stuck in a cycle of negativity. My thoughts are constantly plagued by complaints, past argument and faults, and more. I would love for there to be a day where I did not obsess over the negative details of the day. I recently was invited to a dinner where I saw not one person use their phone, and people barely complained about their life or their work week. They were genuinely engaged in conversation and interested in what others were saying. That's how I want to live my life.
Do something little every day. Take a habit and keep it, even by doing just a bit. Set a schedule, as much as possible - but don't blame yourself if you can't keep it for external causes (including health). Monitor and reduce your time on social media. Cut negative people and hate reading.
one of my meditations - set your intention for the day, "today i will be happy. today i will be compassionate." (including compassionate toward myself) what more does anyone need?
I would like to be more physically fit in the next year. I am blessed with reasonably good health and am grateful. I do have type 2 Diabetes and it is sort of under control, but could use improvement. I need to be stronger in following the diet and definitely need to get more regular exercise. One thing that might help is to look for a walking partner. I really don't feel comfortable walking alone and having another person might strengthen my committment. So, goal one, find a walking partener. Then honor the committment.
Strangely, I need to stop worrying about what other people think about me. I say its strange because I feel like I just came out of a phase when I was doing well in that category. Now, I feel off. I know I absorb the energy around me and the mojo at work has been weird - therefore, I'm feeling weird. And even though I KNOW that the only thing that I can control is my attitude and labor - my heart is screaming "TELL ME I'M DOING A GOOD JOB!" I think it has a less to do with confidence and more to do with praise. I think I need more positive affirmation in my life. Not in the form of parties (which I find awkward) or gifts (which are nice, but I feel beholden), but in small and deserved "good job" comments. It could be a reaction to the my experience at my last job where I received so little graduated for my management - so now I am feeling extra needy. The root fear of that is: am I not receiving praise because I didn't deserve it. I know there is a culture at my current job to not give praise on your "day job". I understand that to some extent, but I lead the ENDING HUNGER division! Our "day job" is big stuff! No, we haven't ended hunger in our county, but if we achieve a big milestone that is foundational to our work - lets recognize it! I'll get off my soapbox now. I hope by this time next year, I'll do better.
I'd like to lose these extra few pounds and exercise regularly. I know I'd feel better about myself and could wear my own clothes again. And, I'd like to become more grounded as a published author and have a stream of income from it. And, I'd like to find a relationship with a man and have love in my life, built on a friendship and led by a loving, open God. I'd like to see what that's like. The piece of advice I received the past year would be to just allow - let it in.
Finally see therapist, coping skills paramount.
be bold, turning 50 has made me start to realize that I cannot sit back and just let things happen I must be bold ask! and ask! and ask! and also look and notice , I receive advice and counsel all the time I especially like the ones from where I least expect it. I am trying to remain open and aware
This is a tough question. I think I'd like to get back my optimistic outlook that I lost during the end of my marriage. It's in there. As for my life, I'd like to be more financially self reliant for my daughter and I. The best advice I've gotten that I could use for guidance was to stop dumping on myself. It takes me nothing to blame myself for absolutely everything.
I would like to do a better job "walking the walk" of listening generously and being kinder to my family. I do a good job of being kind to my friends and colleagues, but with my family I am not. I would like to stop looking for things to complain about with my in laws, I would like to be kind to Yuval and to work on our relationship and I would like to be a better and more loving and kind mother to my children.
To me this question is way to similar to question number 6. so the answer is the same so I copy and pasted... It says describe ONE thing that would like to achieve by next year. I am to describe TWO things. One- I would like to have my finances in order and a serious budget. and Two- I would like to have my own little goup of zumba/dance going.
Today at Yom Kippur services the rabbi spoke about how we need to see ourselves ad our families in the millions of Syrian refugees currently trying to find a new home. She mentioned this quote when she spoke about how it can be hard to feel like you are making change when you are just one small person:"We cannot afford the luxury of feeling overwhelmed" by Ruth Messinger. I would like to always remember that it is a luxury to feel overwhelmed i.e. don't sweat the small stuff. This next year, I would like to: --find my large sense of compassion again --find a charity or organization to contribute to/volunteer with --continue to educate myself of current evens and world news, but also develop more pronounced opinions about these issues, and be able to speak to this opinion --stop biting my nails and picking my cuticles --make more of an effort to eat well and cheat less often when eating well --Use that quote to decrease my anxiety, and take necessary steps to decrease this anxiety --try to restore my positive look on life, and be less pessimistic
Not necessarily advice or counsel, but one of the quotes I learned this year that has stuck with me is this: "Home isn't where you were born - it's where you become yourself." That's from a Pico Iyer TED talk that I have passed along to anyone who may be remotely interested. I think that within the context of my nomadic life, this is a really interesting concept. I think it's always been obvious that the concept of "home" changes for me, but this statement shapes it in a more dynamic way. I suppose what I would like to do to improve myself next year is to find a new home, in which I can begin becoming myself again.
In so many ways! I hope to go through yoga teacher training, to quit my job, to find a new calling, to continue to work towards living my best life. To remain a non-smoker, to continue to invest in taking care of myseld; mind, body and soul. DO IT!
I want to be better at asking questions--open ended, inquisitive questions--and then really listening to the answers. I'm getting better, but need more practice.
To work harder to achieve goals and broaden my world and to stop procrastinate. I've been told by my parents and by other people to trust more in myself and to work hard to achieve goals.
I would like to lose weight and have an active/healthy lifestyle to maintain it. It's not only for me but for my baby: I want to be able to keep up with him by the time he can crawl and run around. I want to play with him and enjoy our time together, esp in the park and outside. After learning about manual therapy as a PT method, I know for certain that my ankles are not a permanent scourge to my exercise efforts. And while I can, I should not be afraid to seek medical help. Being shy doesn't help anyone.
I'd like to be a nicer wife and mother and have a strong and positive relationship with my husband and children. To do this I must work on my self-regulation.
I would like to be in better shape and lose a little weight . My Zumba class helps me ,and also my Dr's advice is to slim down a bit . It is hard because eating is a social event .
I would like to be on teams and constantly surrounding myself by communities of like minded and powerful people. I would like to get control over some of my bad habits, destructive behaviors. Evan Lambert shared with me to take actions with my commitments not from my internal state.
I would like to introduce our children to the joy of eating healthy by bringing them into the kitchen more often. I'm hopeful that the hands-on experience will instill in them an appreciation and love for fresh, natural foods and the importance of incorporating them into our diet. I would also like to do more walks/hikes as a family. We all love them and I have found that the kids, Bri and I are more positive overall when we partake in family activities on a regular basis. Also, getting Adam to stop coming to our bed in the middle of the night will help Bri and I get the rest we need instead of living in 0ur current state of complete exhaustion.
Be a better person and begin to exercise and eat more healthy and get out of this house more and especially spend more time in praise and worship.
I want to CLEAN OUT THE HOUSE. We have too much stuff, piles and shit throughout that I want it GONE. I want to be able to find my things and my kids' things without too much effort. We don't need so much of what we hang on to. I want it OUT, GONE, DESTROYED. I am going to have an affair with Goodwill. Well, a one way affair where I give and give and don't take.
Avoid relationships with crazy women who use you. It is okay and authentic to be giving, but set boundaries. You have a lot to offer. Don't get sucked into the drama.
Swear less. Read more. Write more. Pray more. Walk more.
I did not receive any counsel. I need to lose weight. I is difficult doing it on your own. Since my spouse likes sweets... it is frustrating to have addicting foods waved at you and not eat them. Becoming more active will have to do.
1. Let the crap go. 2. Improve mindfulness through meditation & behavior. 3. Improve health, both mental & physical through yoga. 4. Be in a loving relationship with Jason, all in. 5. Be a better friend to Fran. Ask for help when I need it. Don't be afraid to love. Rejection is simply how the universe is telling you to go another direction.
Next year, I would like to be more kind and empathetic, to myself and to others. I would also like to be a harder worker. I think I need to make a schedule and stick to it, and stay organized. I think I am working on making empathy a habit, and I need to remind myself that not being jealous goes with that as well.
I hope to be kinder and more understanding of others or in better words to expand the network of those to whom I am kind. I think the people who are important to me, I treat with a tremendous sense of loyalty and there are others who have the opposite experience of me as a person. I'd like to be more constant all around as opposed to operating on two extremes.
I would like to be more content with my present circumstances, as well as more present with my family.
My life will be better if I continue to feel better physically. I want to keep a balance to my life. Well rounded. Continue giving to others by volunteering. Continue to eat purposefully, health awareness. Continue to study and learn-to stay up with the world. Expand my knowledge. Expand my pleasure of mind, body and spirit. Continue my genealogy studies. DNA. Continue to keep Alex and myself close in our hearts, by acting and speaking in the most loving way. Giving and sharing with each other.
Be more mindful and present, come back to myself, the self I want to be. Be present and open to all I can learn just by paying attention to myself.
Here is the most important thing I want to remind myself daily: "Listen better, talk less." It will help me learn to connect with people better if I spend more time truly hearing them and thinking about the meaning of and behind their words, rather than jumping in too soon.
I would like to drink less wine. As much as I love wine, I think it would be better if I drank less of it. :-) And exercise more. As for advice/counsel, I could use some. I love good advice.
I hope to have eliminated being stuck in sympathetic mode and living in well being instead. Remember 5 Element acupuncture if you are not fully there, it goes to the heart of this release and renewal. Beyond that, I also wish and expect to be working, at least in some fashion, on writings and music of my own. Reading, reflecting, organizing, planning. And, seriously, you should be offering articles to Good Times and perhaps other publications. The time is ripe. Catch that fruit before it rots!
Look back over question six first; but the other thing that hasn't congealed yet is PROTEST and SERVICE. I have begun to feel I have not given in a real way to causes I believe in (as opposed to arts and culture). Advice, I have always been self advised; but I keep thinking I would like a salon, cohort or cadre to keep me real and force me to set dates and goals and find like minded companions.
To get my body and mind healthy as naturally as possible. No this is just what I want. I actually have this aggie to my daughter and should follow it for myself
I need to carve time to figure out how to heal *me*. I have been so overwhelmed with pain and "must do" things, that this medical "sabbatical" this year has not had much if any time spent on me. What am I going to do with the next five years? How am I going to do it? What makes me happy and how do I make that work in a post back fusion, post brain surgery, post RA world?
Understand love. Feel love. Say, love. I need to find out what William said during the LSD trip while I was sobbing. I'm sure that was something worth of advice or counsel. He's too good of a human-being.
I'd like to be more peaceful. Right now my world is filled with a little bit too much *stuff* ...I'd like to find a clarity and calm that can be a bit more tangible in my every day life. Even as simple as removing clutter from the house.
I'd like to start working out more. Making time is really hard and I'm not good at doing the hard thing. The best piece of advice I've gotten is that I don't have to be perfect, I just have to do something. I need to remember that every day.
I would like to learn better who I am, outside of other people. I've spent most of my life clinging to others, and I want to learn to stand on my own. My sister summed it up well. She said "I think that most of your life you've tried to be what you thought others wanted you to be, and have helped others follow their dreams - it's time for you to find your dream."
Improve myself. My life. By this time next year, I'd like to be in a different situation at work. I'd either like to have accepted that it really is enough. Even if barely, enough, and accepted it. Or. Or I'd like to have made or be making a change. There is good reason I am where I am right now. For one thing, my mom changes jobs and locations like she changes her socks. In reaction, I've committed myself to being more like . . . well, maybe more like bed sheets. They don't need to stay on forever, but a few weeks won't hurt anything. I've been in this job three years after having had to change from a career to a job when life happened. Sticking with it hasn't been bad. I have health insurance. It's not too much job for me. It's not horrible. And not only do I not love it, I don't like it much, and I hate feeling like most of my days are a waste of life points. I know there is something to just providing for one's family. But there is something to making the world a better place, too. It'd be nice if I could do both again. However, I also value just having a job. Because sometimes the job we have to do is the one in front of us. So, I don't know, exactly. Improve myself by accepting my job. Improve myself by changing jobs. Improve myself by finding a career again - something more than a job. Something. One of those things.
I want to be successful, learn sales skills, and sell sell sell. I want people to respect me for my hard work and accomplishments.
I'd like to get uncluttered. If it doesn't bring you joy, do not keep it, counsels Marie Kondo (The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up). I'd like to finally clear out all the unwanted, sentimental cling-ons that are cluttering up my life and mind and organize our apartment and lives. I need systems! I will need to hire someone to help me do this. Someone fun but unsentimental (but empathetic). I predict it will be painful but liberating.
I'd like to continue to work on overcoming my fears and taking action every day. 'The path to peace is through action," is a phrase I've been repeating to myself. I've read a lot of inspirational stuff this year (as usual!)--one piece that stands out is Coach Stephanie's definition of success as being the willingness to keep on trying, to keep yourself in the game, every day. Anna Kunnecke's EFBA principles have the same spirit--1) tell the truth; 2) don't give up. I can get into this philosophy of persistence and general resilience. I'm working on believing in a higher standard for myself, believing that I am worth it and that we are all worth it. Having faith that more good is to come, so worry is not needed.
Patience Commitment to quiet self time, more reading, time with friends and exercise routine
Not planning ever minute of every day. Focusing on relationships that I already have and not feeling disappointed if I have only a few close friends. Being more go with the flow when things don't totally go according to my expectations. I think I have improved on this a lot since being abroad but I definitely have more room for growth.
.. I want to be able to learn to grow and change with ease and less self-judgment and fear. My Shaman said many things this past year that were meaningful and helpful- one of them being that My son’s trip in this spiritual world is his trip alone. I can do some things to help or support him but he must travel this alone- I need to accept that he is on his own path - I am working hard on making this message a meaningful part of my approach to parenting the beautiful being that is my son.
"Get back on the bike". I referenced this when talking to Rabbi Pachter the night before Dad's funeral. It is a lesson he taught me back when I was little and afraid to get back on my bike after falling off and needing stitches. I want to strive to get back on the bike when things don't go my way or I struggle do accomplish something. In set-backs in life, it is important to get out there and try again. I want to keep this mantra with me over the next year, life will happen, and I need to get back on the bike!
Yes: that we can love people we dislike. That came from my Rabbi. I would like to learn to better trust myself and act accordingly.
Listen to advice from a wider variety of philosophies.
Write more! Write More! Paint more! Spend quality time with my baby and focus my attention on her when all else goes to Hell. Move to Washington because I am obviously happier up there. My face and attitude show others my joy of living up there.
I would like to become a person who does not waste time and energy in fruitless pursuits. I want to make each moment matter, and surround myself with only those people and things that I need and love. If it sparks joy, keep it. If not, give it away.
I've been job hunting recently, and in the interest of being task-oriented, have pretty much been looking as far ahead as next September, if that. Really I just want the offer and then I'll figure out what next. However, I decided to read 'Lean In' by Sheryl Sandberg, and it's actually made me think a lot about myself as a woman, and how I am, both in work and the rest of life. Her premise is that women, for one reason or another, don't 'lean in' - they don't take risks, reach for opportunities or stick their neck out to get noticed. Men do. Gender aside, I consider myself a fairly collaborative, gentle (though outgoing) and certainly not aggressive, person. I've always considered this one of my strengths - last summer I worked with women who were just the opposite and later heard that no one enjoyed working with them either. People like working with me. But Sandberg's book has made me think maybe it's possible to lean in and grab opportunities without being unpleasant. Little things like putting your hand up, taking a job you're only 70% rather than 100% sure you can do, and trusting to your own skills, might make all the difference. When I think back, yes I've made big mistakes, but I can't think of one that was the result of taking a risk rather than not taking it. Maybe I should give it a go.
Here's something I've learned from getting into remission: it's amazing how much easier life is when you narrow things down to routines - eating the same few things every day, following patterns, really frees your mind up (and takes stress off your body) in a way that allows for other things to grow - eliminate unnecessary decision fatigue whenever possible. And something else: remember that your best choices are the ones that fall within a venn diagram between what you enjoy, what satisfies you, what benefits you, and what costs the least to the world and people around you. If I can incorporate those two pieces of guidance into my life in the coming year, I think the rest will fall into place.
To my future self, I would advise: Buckle down, do right. Stay rested, and everything will be so much easier. Keep in your heart the reasons that you do this. Memorize the Words of Truth and Hope. Act justly, love mercy, walk humbly with your G-d.
Be LESS focused on my needs. Talk less about other people. Be happy by who your sorounded by. Stop Kvetching so much. Stop judging people who are in relationships and pitying yourself for feeling ditched. Either hang out with the couple or be confident in being on your own. Either way your not alone... Stop painting it to be that way. If he's not with you right now, its because he doesn't want to be. Take the advice you give. ALWAYS BE KIND - THERE IS NEVER AN EXCUSE NOT TO BE. Als0 my future life advice if your in a relationship: -Your friends came first -Will be there after -Don't worry about them getting to know him - HE should be working on getting to know them - not vice versa -Prioritize -Continue sharing with friends when times are hard. Keep them close...Keep them around ;) -DONT be annoying in a relationship -Don't be that girl! K thankssss ;)
I want to step back and let go. My kids are growing up and need ,me to let them be more independent and self relying! I need to stop fixing everything and let them have the consequences that come with the bad choices or mistakes they make and the accomplishments for the good.
I would like to continue being a good partner to my boyfriend. I would like to get more sleep each night. I would like to be engaged by this time next year.
I think I just need to get away from myself sometimes. Every problem, event, relationship or goal turns into a big fat strategy, which makes me less than great at spontaneity, being present, and flexibility. I'm too quick to see changes in the plan as failures, and I see a lack of a plan as laziness. Sometimes I need to see what the universe will hand me if I let myself stop trying to control it.
Coming to this new grad program has really made me aware of how socially insecure I am, and how quick I am to judge myself and then to project those judgments onto others. I would love to be less fearful and more secure with myself. I think, in general, people like me, and I don't know why I can't see that. Worse, I think my own insecurities sometimes motivate me to treat people poorly in order to avoid being hurt, and I really don't like that. It's something that has been an issue my whole life, and I wish I had some specific advice for how to deal with it. The best I can do, though, is to keep questioning my own assumptions and try to push past the fear as well as I can.
I started reading this book called Eat That Frog. Changed my mindset on a lot of things. Because I was great with the people side of my job I believed I was successful and couldn't understand why I wasn't progressing in my career path...but being good with the people side of it isn't my whole job. I was putting off a lot of things I didn't like to do instead of completing them early. This left me with no time to do extra projects. I am challenging myself to really put that book to test and apply it in my life. Start today and going forward through the year....i want to see how it changes me on a large scale
I would like to continue my exercise routine and increase my daily walk / run totals from 6000 steps per day to 10,000 or more per day.
Improving my emotional intelligence so I can better deal with my own feelings, understand my son's feelings, and communicate with others more effectively.
Acceptance of physical condition!
I want to be more accepting of myself as I am, a decent human being with problems just like everyone else, and stop berating myself for not being better, not "living up to my potential." whatever the heck that is. In action and in my heart, I'd like to be satisfied that, at the end of each day, I can reflect and decide that it was a good day, even if I didn't reverse global warming or bring about world peace.
My #1 piece of advice, though not original, comes from my mother: This too shall pass. I am also extremely inspired by "People should not say one thing with their mouths and something else with their hearts." - Baba Metziah 49a
I want my focus to keep on being happy. That means to be healthy to a degree too, but I will not be focused on weightloss and I will not diet. I will try to be aware of what food makes me feel good, but that is it!
I would like to improve my ability to make decisions, being less emotionally charged in decision making, and not relying on others when I should be trusting myself. A few months ago I met with a counselor who noted my fear of making the "wrong decision". This is something I want to be aware of and work on. I have a great fear of making mistakes which is not a healthy state to live life.
Again, more peace, more letting go, more surrendering to God, more helping others. Getting closer to Jesus. It's sounds trite, but I am going to ask myself WWJD everytime I start to freak out about a kid getting in trouble at school or not being invited to a party or some health concern. I would tell myself (in terms of advice) to trust in God --- to work hard but not worry about the outcome so much.
Oh, man, this is tough. I feel like I've grown so much in the past year, & I'm surprised to find that I don't really miss D.C. at all. My life now is exactly where I'm supposed to be. I guess I just want to remember that it won't always be like it is now - whether now is great or awful or just average - & that change is always coming. I've never been very good at rolling with the punches, but life hasn't let me down yet, & I'm really just trying to trust the process - to know that I will always be OK.
Move forward and don't keep looking back is always good advice; now I just have to follow it. By next year, I'd like to have changed what I am doing in some way; even if it is only to figure out what I should be doing. Maybe that will be my goal for this year; figure out what i should be doing, and the steps required to achieve that goal. In the meantime, not letting the perfect be the enemy of the good; I need to volunteer for something that helps people.
I have so many dreams for myself. I need/want to make a vision board at some point and have those as a constant reminder... It would be great and cathartic and inspiring! Advice: You are worthy. You can do it. Leap and the net will follow.
Over the next year, I have a lofty goal. I would like to be able to source my happiness from something beyond day to day circumstances or even larger goals being met (a new job, marriage, a family of my own, perfect health, financial security, a physical home and the capacity to take care of my parents). At this moment, in September of 2015, I feel so far away from these goals being met, in spite of a year when I've worked to make strides towards all of them - and failed on several fronts. It just doesn't make sense to wait to be happy until these goals are accomplished, and I'm currently not happy. It also seems like effort towards these goals is only part of the equation. I'm tno exactly sure how I'm going to meet this goal but I'm going to try meditation. It seems like one way to access the part of me that isn't temporary or fleeting and a way to observe thoughts and emotions - and know that I'm not one and the same as them. So much of this year has been about grasping; maybe next year can be about letting go.
I want to defend myself vigorously, not by being defensive but by emphatically saying, “fuck you” when someone puts me down. I do not want to give other people a break for their bullshit. I want to stick up for myself. I want to my mother's example when she defended me against bullying teachers to be a guide. I also want to remember to be gritty.
I'm still focused on my physical health and fitness. I have started talking more with people at my gym and have had some great advice from them, the best being "it's a journey" in relation to moving forward a little at a time and keeping it realistic when I have so far to go. The owner of the gym sends motivational memes which makes me feel supported, but sometimes he goes a little overboard, but still it's nice.
Stretch more. Breathe more. Leave the house more. I tend to hole up when stressed, and I shouldn't. (I should at least hole up in the back yard with a single malt.)
I need to get better with confrontation and conflict management, asafp. I can't keep seeking to runaway from people--there will always be people who get on my nerves or underperform and that doesn't mean that I need to go away but perhaps they do need to find out about themselves!
Don't you dare play small. And see yourself the way other people see you. I am capable of great, great things. I know this. I've always known this. And I get scared. I become afraid of what people think and that I will disappoint them or myself. I throw myself pity parties that are not helpful to ANYONE. When I am on point - productive, happy, generous, positive - then I am serving the world in a big, powerful way. That is how I want to live this next year.
I would like to accomplish two things. I would like to say "no" more often. Not to be mean or harsh, but to maintain my sanity and understand that I cannot do everything and be everywhere for everyone. I want a solid group of real friends who care for me just as much as I do them. The second thing I want to do is trust my instincts more, and learn to let things go. So often I hold onto things that I KNOW are toxic to me, or hurt me in some way. And I'm done doing this. It's time to cut the cords that bind me, and allow my wounds to heal. In the grand scheme of things, most of the small crises we deal with do not matter. My goal is to learn to fight through these and understand the big picture.
Be consistent in my sport / fitness / training Be authentic and honest in my relationship with Steve. I know where I'm most exposed (e.g. challenges with monogamy, honesty) and I'd like this to be different I need to be a little more selfish. I need to stop offering to pay all the time. Be more direct with what I want in my living conditions. I want to put the joy back into my life. What do I like doing? How can I get involved in something weekly that I look forward to?
Be more compassionate within my family. Be less judgmental in my thoughts. Learn everything about the zoo animals. Advice was yamas and niyamas
I would like to work on losing it less when things don't go my way. I think it was humbling/disheartening to realize I could still be so disrupted by major disappointments. I think I should work on allowing myself to be sad about things while still keeping on.
I need to get out more. Listen to lectures and speakers, go to the symphony and concerts, see more sites in Baltimore and Washington. It's been too easy to get in a rut. Advice that I've received in the past year? Try to avoid drama and drama queens. Read more. Stress less. Plan for a recovery day after overseas travel. Try to convince my husband to also rest and relax. Get into a routine with my in-laws. Get them caught up with dentist and eye doctor appointments. Take care of my own health needs as well.
"Act with love." "Pray as if everything counted on God, act as if everything counts on you." "You musn't be afraid to sparkle a little brighter, darling." "What if I fall? Oh but darling, what if you fly?" "And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it" "She is quick and curious and playful and strong." I'd like to put myself in other's shoes more and not take things so personally and myself so seriously. I'd like to evaluate my actions and involvements and only do what makes me happy. I'd like to approach all situations with love and an attitude of assuming good will. I would like to make a decision and stick to it, which I'm already great at. I'd like to monitor my daily vocabulary and remove terms such as "like," "um," "just," and "guys." Speaking in a more sure and deliberate way makes people listen to you. I will take risks, big ones that make me scream. I will feel my emotions in a way I have not before and accept those feelings.
As I said in answer 7 I want to loose 50 lbs. by next year. I don't want to kill to much time between tasks. When there is something to do I want to do it.
I would like to enjoy my relationships with people day by day and not hope for something that does not exist.
I just want to be a better mom and wife and friend and employee. So I think my goal is to focus on one thing at a time (work when I'm at work, listen to kids when they are home, concentrate on my husband when we're on a date). Stop trying to do everything all at once, and be more present in each moment.
Don't lose what youve gained this year.
Personal care and consistency with marriage and quality time with kids. Keep it fun, not work and don't take it for granted that you have tomorrow. Live life, love life!
I'm always striving to regulate my exercise/yoga routines. I continue to strive for that discipline. It's good for both my mind and body; it is the best self-care I could ever give myself.
I'd like to be better at following through on things that I start. Perhaps the most helpful thing to remember is that if you don't do something, nobody else will.
I want to improve myself by honoring my need for a routine and schedule more; taking better care of my health and setting a good example for my children. Be consistent.
In my life I feel contented. I would like to continue my path as it is for now and enjoy the many blessings that have come my way. Perhaps not take on so many tasks, but I'm always saying that and still I take on many things.
Really establish two priorities in my life - healthy exercise and meditation. I want to go back to the disciplines that help me be healthier and open to communication with those non-embodied sources of guidance that work with me.
I hope to achieve some zen at work, even if it's only occasionally. I need to be more relaxed. I'm currently embracing "Not my circus, not my monkeys" and "It is what it is" as my two sayings to get me through. I can't control everything and it's about letting things go.
Calm down, keep stress levels at nil. Let events happen because we cannot control them.
Everyone seems to keep telling me to pursue what I love, to follow my passion. Everyone seems to believe in myself except for me. I suppose I would like to follow that piece of advice. I want to use caution going into this new relationship as well, I want to make sure I am making myself happy, and letting someone else complement that. Falling in love is the best feeling in the world, it's wonderful bliss, but I want to be stable and balanced. I feel like I have learned that my relationships are the most important things in my life (friendships, family, and romantic love as well), so I don't think that making those a priority is a bad thing. I want to continue focusing on improving myself every day, I think I am very self-improvement driven. That's how I've gotten where I am in grad school, with pet rescue, etc. I want to continue trying to live healthier, eating well, exercising, taking time to be emotionally healthy, etc.
Acceptance!!! Self Compassion!!! This will also change! I'd like to continue on my path of daily meditations. I think there's so much more to get out of Vipassana if I just dedicate more time to the practice. The more I sit, the more I'm aware of it's benefits.
I feel like I am always unfolding and I want to pay more attention to and cultivate my rightness rather than looking at it from a stance of fixing myself. This year I realized I have spent way to much time improving rather than being and doing and it didn't leave me much time to notice what I was doing that is valuable and a contribution. To improve myself and my life next year, I am going to improve myself by noticing who I truly am fully aware of my wholeness. It's time to release feeling broken and embrace wholeness.
I have just started learning - or re-learning - tactics on how to relax and have some 'me time'. I want to get back into yoga, keep up the walks/jogs, continue to read and do more gardening. Things that give me the opportunity to chill out and take a break from work and motherhood from time to time. Hopefully this means that I'll snap less at my loved ones and be overall a better person. The advice that comes to mind came from Justin 'Remember why you started your business.' The whole point was to have a better work/life balance and be able to juggle working around our family. So even though I also hope to grow and improve my business in the next year, ultimately, my family and me must come first!
I want to learn to judge less and love more. i want to be more aware of how i affect those around with my words and actions.
I still intend to grow physically (strength), mentally (wisdom), emotionally (more wisdom) and spiritually (continue seeking). In the wise words of Ong Wei Chang: "Life goes on." Let go of attachment to outcomes.
Never sell yourself short, plan more about your life ahead, respect time and money and get a partner. I guess, I should take more advises and counselling - maybe yes, select a specialization and be at it to develop your niche and don't get stuck.
Don't spend too much time pitying yourself - it doesn't change anything, it's unattractive, and it doesn't take you to where you want to go, or who you want to be. MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF! Whether an afternoon in nature to sit and do nothing, alone, or scheduling date nights once a week with just you, do NOT forget to embrace solitude and all you gain from it - remember that the peace you found in solitude made you the person you are today. Continue to make space for it in your busy life; it is one of the only times you truly reflect on your life, which for you is a big part of what gives your life meaning.
I want to be productive and live in the present, and never forget how privileged and lucky I am, even when I am completely swamped with work and other responsibilities. All of the things I have to do are generally things I want to do, and it is good to remember and appreciate that.
I want to improve my financial record keeping and overall stewardship.
Something I tell myself often is that other peoples' success does not make your own success any less. I would like to let go of the feeling that I need to measure up to others in some way, or the feeling that if I have time to sit and breathe and think, I'm not doing enough. I would like to make peace with whatever circumstance I am given, but to keep working to get to where I want to be. I would like to stop being so hard on myself, and treat myself with more love and acceptance. I would like to drink less.
To love myself and to stop putting myself down. I would like to crack the shell of my story, the especially negative parts, and start to live freely and more lovingly.
Breathe. Stop analyzing everything and thinking too ahead. You are happiest in communities of tolerance and chessed. You are most yourself when you are with a woman. Please don't try to force something that doesn't align. You are your own worst enemy. Take each challenge that Hashem sends and remember that he has partnership in that ownership too. You are less alone than you imagine. You rejevunate through giving. Allow yourself to be. Your needs aren't nuisance, they are an opportunity to self care. Please don't forget how far you have come in the face of how far you have to go.
“The work you do while you procrastinate is probably the work you should be doing for the rest of your life.” I find this quote somewhat glib (who would collect garbage? clean toilets?), but still it inspires me to make the work I love a greater priority.
Be Dynamic. Be Genuine. Pay attention to details, but don't sweat the small stuff. Be Kind.
Similar themes again. In the slightly longer term, I'd like to travel more, attend more cultural events, and engage in more creative endeavors. But the one thing that would immediately improve our lives, if only my husband and I could think of a way to implement it without causing chaos, strained relationships, and hostility, would be to get our older son to move out of the house and begin an independent life.
I want to improve myself and my life next year by getting a girlfriend.....losing my virginity! getting better with women.....becoming a ladies' man.....having a better job that pays well.....preferrably a job that I love and don't mind working at. I wanna be leaner and more toned.....lose my man tits and spare tire/muffin top. Build more muscle. Get more attractive! Have more girls wanting me, obsessed with me, wanting to date me! Get to know myself better and fully and be able to know what it is exactly that I want in life and just going for it. Getting more determined and more disciplined. Having the motivation to do everything I want to do. Having a bigger group of friends and getting involved in activities where I can belong to a group. I just wanna become a better man and person overall. I wanna do what it takes to become a man. I wanna become more sociable and learn how to talk to people better. I wanna be seen as more outgoing and friendly! I wanna be seen as great boyfriend material
Would like to set more focused goals; have already done this in that I'm planning a trip to Germany next year and am taking German classes now. But mostly want to continue to deepen the friendships I have, because, seriously, they're all I have because I don't have close family ties.
As always, I would like to stay calmer, lose my temper less often, not yell at my husband or child(ren). I have read lots of advice; the problem is that none of it comes to me in the moment.
I've been working out more, and I would like to continue that, and even work out more - hopefully by this time next year, I will be working out regularly three times a week at least.
I think I'm going to need to really work on work-life balance. I'm looking at a schedule where I'm going to be working six days a week every other week. Katrina is encouraging me to look for another job where I don't work Saturdays, but I see myself staying at Andover Newton for a while. Working at a place where you're happy is rare. I need to figure out how to both not burn out and have a life where Katrina and I can spend quality time together and do everything we want to do.
Chill the fuck out and enjoy life.
Become healthier in areas in which I have some control: weight loss, activity, etc.
Low profile hero
Spend less time worrying about other people. Spend less time being defined by your relationships with other people. Spend less time worrying about how you compare with other people. No shit.
I don't trust advice or counsel... Perhaps more accurately I don't have people in my life that I'd trust advice or counsel from. They don't know me well enough, I sure don't know myself enough to trust any advice.
I'd like to spend a lot less time playing around online. I want to take more time for myself... my other said "you should do something nice for yourself every day". I'd like to do that.
I would like to continue with my spiritual growth, perhaps train as rekei master...something I have looked into but not actively pursued. This would enable me to grow and to assist others. I think my advice to myself would be to just do it. I can begin and thus, follow through...it IS in my nature. I just need to make the choice.
Stop drinking altogether, Practice Buddhist principles with better regularity and presence of mind
Stress. I just need to chill out. I'm not entirely happy with what I have right now so i need to work that out with myself. I can't remember any advice really...
This upcoming year I would like to find more time to spend on writing, reading and dancing. I am happier and therapized by writing. I can spend hours in a very creative space through reading. And I become confident in so many areas of my life (physical, pedagogic, romantic) when I dance. This past year I received some quintessentially American advice: "You Got This!" That's what I would tell myself. You got this. This is all yours and you are allowed to have it, use it, be it however you choose. This life belongs to you. There is no need to satisfy the wants of others. YOU, no one else, GOT THIS.
I would like to feel fit. Finally. Exercise is so important to me. Also, I'd like to have sex again. Been a while. As Marty Lerner has said: "You don't have to like it, you just have to do it."
I would like to stop giving away so much work for free.
More time for family, but constructive time that is meaningful for my daughter and wife. Not advice per se, but a sense of utilizing my time wisely as it pertains to the influence I will have over my children and in continuing to grow in my relationship with my wife.
As my friend has said, "You have to feel all the feels." I want to allow myself to feel, rather than ignore, hide, numb, or mitigate my emotions. No matter how vulnerable or exposed it makes me feel, it's likely the only way I will truly process all the grief and difficult emotions I'm feeling in the wake of losing my mother.
I would like to get out there more. I know I say that a lot, but I guess this time I have no choice. I'm moving to a city alone with no friends. I really have no choice. I would like to become even more independent, and more confident. Confidence is something I have struggled with my entire life, and although I notice improvement, especially this summer with my new DGAF/say what I want attitude, I still have a lot more I can work on. New motto: Do Stuff. You're only here until you're there so you just gotta throw your hands up, pee a little when you laugh, and enjoy the ride.
I can't pin it on any specific advice. But I would like to be more strategic in everything I do. In other words, not get caught up too deeply in the details, but think of how to offer the most amount of value in any decision and then do it efficiently. This would help in my professional and personal life. But a big part of it is being disciplined and managing time better. Also having more confidence.
As it happens, I just read an article the gist of which was, how would my life be different if I knew I would never find "the one". I'm not sure that I completely buy into the article's premise that, free from the search for love, we would live fuller, happier lives being the person that we want to be for ourselves. But I confess that I have spent much of the last month trying to accept exactly this and wondering exactly how that does change my life. Certainly it means spending less time at singles events that I don't enjoy. But will I actually be happier? I fear that I would be the opposite, that this is a path to hopelessness and despair.
I would like to enjoy all the moments of my day by being awake and aware of the beauty of life and the mystery. Mussar guides me
After the rough year of babyhood, and a hectic summer of daycare, we'll be settling into our family of four. I have to remember that I'm the emotional captain of this ship. Keeping things in perspective--knowing how incredibly blessed we are--will help me to keep a light loving touch.
Notice and choose Marginal gains Gratitude Breathe Peace Love All 1
Keep working towards being less selfish. Loving people means placing their spiritual well being and my own ahead of material wants.
I would like to get my fitness goals and health back on track. I want to take that damn dance class and put my unused ballet shoes to good use. My mother, after finding out that both my father and her are paying for their bad habits in their youth, told me that you only live once and the unhealthiness of your youth will come back to bit you. I don't want to be my parents. I want to be healthy and I want to be around long enough to be the parent that my parents probably will never be able to be.
I would like to continue to live healthy... More yoga... More daily gratitude... More writing... More sports- biking and swimming... Do a triathlon... Stay focused on myself and believe in myself...
My advice to myself is to try new things and be willing to step outside my comfort zone. Experience new things as a married couple and be sure to stay connected with friends. Don't become more of a hermit because you moved further from the city.
Follow your heart and trust your intuition. "Listen to your own voice, your own soul, too many people listen to the noise of the world, instead of themselves". I'm finding this to be a little too true and my goal for next year is to really start listening to my voice within more. I've never regretted listening to it.
This year I learnt that we can't plan everything, even if I wanted the life to be like that. Also I learnt that things never turn out the way you expect. I hope I will familiarize with that. In this past year I received the advice that I have to relax and I slowly realize that I have to enjoy my studies, because fastly it will end and I have to work. I really HAVE to enjoy everything!
I need to make time to sharpen the saw this next year. Quickly typing out all 11 10Q questions hours before the deadline is a good indicator of my commitment to learning and growing. Stacks of periodicals loom over my coffee table along with the book I started last Christmas. I plan on a renewed commitment to learning and personal growth.
There are innumerable ways in which I want to improve myself. My main focuses shall be: increase my authenticity to myself and others so I can begin to build up my tribe & contribute meaningfully, decrease my dependency on external motivations (read: stop needing everyone's approval and cut it out with the social media addiction), and take the courses and the workshops I need to take in order to build both Dan's and my own businesses to the point we can succeed, live off our profits, and begin using the extra $ to help others.
I guess I'd like to have less stress, less clutter and more leisure time. The best advice I've received so far is to focus; if only I could follow that!
I think the biggest improvement I hope to make is finding a better balance between my work and home lives: ending the cycle of procrastination that forces me to work on weekends, and limiting the amount of work I do from home so I can truly enjoy the time I spend there.
Amber brought me tulips with a note that said: "you are perfect and whole. show mercy to yourself." I wish to carry this sentiment with me everywhere, forever. I'd like to improve myself by beginning to love myself just as I am.
Be yourself and be true to yourself!
See how it all worked out ultimately? See how strong you were? How much people cared for you? Don't worry - be happy, bitch!! :)
Zenify your Life!
I need to become more disciplined and basically just get my act together - stop feeling sorry for myself, start doing something - anything - that will lead to a financially independent life. Whether that means focusing on writing, treat job-hunting like a job, or just changing a few small bad habits a little bit at a time - anything I start doing differently has to make a difference in my life.
I would like to improve myself by becoming a better person overall. I not like to lie anymore. I would like to be honest, responsible, and trustworthy. I know this may sound a little cheesy but this is actually who I want to become
I want to work on the design of a project at work because I believe that is how I can best contribute to our firm’s award winning quality. I believe that if I work on the design of a project, I will be much more energized at the office, and I will be seen as an important player who makes significant contributions. The work day will go by faster, younger staff will look up to me, and I will be respected by the principals. For now I’ve been pigeon-holed into management work that seems to have limited if any appreciation by anyone. Basically, if I’m designing, I’m doing architecture which is what I’m trained to do and it is what I’m good at. The advice from my immediate superiors is to let people know that I am design savvy. Hmmm. Not sure how to do that. I’m thinking of sending emails to the office about interesting design exhibits or events. The other is to do a seminar about some aspect of design. This could be the “White City” of Tel Aviv (visited in 2013). It would be rich in history and in design, but I need to read a few books and make a worthwhile presentation.
I would like to see the realization of the affirmations I've been repeating nightly to myself: I'd like to meet my life partner/love of my life by the end of 2015; I'd like to be surrounded by love and laughter; I'd like to be patient and gentle; I'd like to radiate love and charisma. I'm struggling a bit still to shake off some of the black mood and feelings from processing through my breakup. I'd like to be well beyond that (and indeed, fully in love with my life-partner-to-be) by this time next year. I'd like to be better-tempered, less quick to anger and judgment than I've been lately. I'd like to continue to speak my full truths, but to find a way that makes those truths somehow gentled and easier to receive. As for advice, I'm going to go with these wise words from Maya Angelou: "Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better."
I want to trust myself and allow myself to move forward in the places where I am inspired. I need to give myself permission to pursue my interests, as scary and difficult and uncomfortable as it might be.
Fitness. I think this is goal I would actually stick with. If by this time next year and I'm still fat. I'll be super upset with myself.
The best counsel came from Sister Kathleen, my spiritual adviser. She noted that intentional meditation or disciplined spiritual practice doesn't have to mean setting aside a certain amount of time each day and sitting quietly in the dark. She suggested that my habit of gratitude, my habit of joy, are both spiritual disciplines too. It rang true to me and makes it easier to see the spiritual aspects of everyday living. I want to keep this up.
I want to be healthier, braver, better off professionally, more confident. No advice, this is just what I want.
similar answer to no 6 plus to learn more about something meaningfull to me unrelated to my career ....not sure what that will be
Break out of my comfort zone!
Stop eating so much. Stop drinking. It's killing you.
I want to be well.
I would like to get much better at making plans and then sticking to them. I often fail to make plans, or make them and spend the day doing something else, instead. I don't think this is a good way to go through life. By this, I mean both annoying life-things (dishes, laundry, grocery shopping) and school/work tasks (getting work done), as well as social things (RSVPing and then actually going to parties, going to public events alone or with others, maybe even crazy ambitious things like cooking Shabbat meals and inviting people over to join me in eating them). I think "Do One Thing" could be helpful, except that sometimes I "Do One Thing" and then I stop. It's better than not having done the one thing, but not as good as, saying, doing 3-5 things that need doing or that would further my larger life goals.
I think that I'd like to grow in my spiritual practice. I'd particularly like to make more friends who share my faith and at least read Hebrew competently. Ideally, by next year I'll be well on the road to understanding Hebrew. I guess the advice that I think would be most useful to me is the advice to "show up," be fully engaged with my life and make genuine choices rather than letting fear, discomfort, and habit make my mind up for me.
That i should get myself a personal trainer, someone i can trust and submit to, to help me become more disciplined and fit, remains a sound idea. let's see if it happens this year...
Treat everyone with love.
Take more control over your own happiness. I've been pretty risk-averse over the past few years, and that has kept things steady. However, keeping things as they are isn't necessarily a good thing. I can sense that this is the time to make a change. I don't want my conservative protector side to keep me in a place of unhappiness, and it's possible I might make another conservative choice (i.e. Another similar role at Apple) instead of taking a bigger risk that could have a big reward both in terms of happiness and money. I know I can get another big company job if I need to. I care about the little details, though, and I know it's not always easy to find the right circumstances. I just have to keep remembering to choose happiness over security. Keep looking for it, and when you find it, leap!
Release your fears. They are not you. They don't own you. Do not let them stay.
I'm in love with the status quo this year. I want to keep doing what I'm doing and settle into a good groove.
I want to learn more about how to be at peace and work toward that end.
I would like to start living in the present more. I feel like life is rushing by and it's terrifying. I need to stop wasting time looking at garbage online or watching terrible TV and starting spending that time doing something creative or productive or meaningful in some way.
To stay calm under every circumstance. Don't sweat the small stuff. It's all small stuff.
I would like to get back in touch with my spiritual self. I would like to have a better idea of what my connection with Judaism is, and to create connection to community around me that will help me to navigate this challenging part of my life.
Stop working for people that don't truly value their employees. Do not accept the promises of family owned companies - unless you are part of that family! The best advice for myself my be to start or buy my own company.
Work on living in the now. Live in the present and don't get too far ahead of yourself. Just because you're not sure if you're on the right track, doesn't mean you're on the wrong one. Keep with it, trust your feelings, but try and think clearly. There's still a lot of time :)
I would like to continue to hold things less dearly. It is a piece of counsel I received in the past that I aspire to. I would also like to punish myself less (for things I've said, ways in which I imagine I've injured others or embarrassed myself) and forgive myself more.
I would like to change my perspective and rewrite my narrative. I believe that I am living with an outdat d framework. I am not who I have been telling myself I am. Quincy elucidated this for me. Sometimes you get stuck with the idea of limitations that you have already surpassed. I need to aim myself at new challenges not rehash the old ones.
To take better care of my body. To simplify my physical spaces and interactions with them. To prepare for my next phase.
I would like to improve my attitude toward my husband. I think the best advice in this area is to look for the best in everyone. Sometimes it's easier to look for that in a stranger than in my husband. I would like to change that dynamic.
SHOW UP. Bring all of myself and SHOW UP
I am mostly focused on improving my self discipline and organization skills.
I hope to be in PT school. I want to become more in control of my depression. Kate the physical therapist told me to look at each day as a new day and to try and turn everything into a positive.
As always, read and learn more, touch others' lives positively and become physically stronger. The counsel of others has saved my sanity, stop enabling others and be more assertive for my emotional needs.
I'd like to be calmer to my kids. I'd like to spend more time with my husband and talk more about deep things like we used to. I'd like to read more philosophy books. I'd like the house to look neat and clean all the time. I'd like to get rid of stuff that we have and reduce our expenses so I can donate more money to worthy causes, to people who need it, to the refugees from Syria. I'd like to be better read in general. Honestly, I'd like to be able to tell X how I feel about him or at least resolve my feelings in some way. It's driving me crazy! I have received no counsel or advice this past year. I feel like everything I did this year was like pulling teeth. Nothing went easy for me this year. It was a really hard year. It was a good year, after all, because the misery of the whole of it made us move and that was a good move, but even what I do now is hard. Even though it's fulfilling, it's hard. I feel like I don't get a moment to breathe, like I have a lot of obligations I need to fulfill, and I feel a lot of pressure to be perfect. I feel like I go from one task to another, and I have to be a super sweet organized and sensitive and contained and dignified person. I do things that are extremely fulfilling that I want to do, but I'm still not happy. I think I give too much and don't receive enough. I hate my job. I don't interact enough with friends. I don't share my emotions enough. I keep them all bottled in. I wish I could be less concerned with keeping a perfect image and with being Miss Psychologist to everyone all the time. But I really don't want to do that because I want to be selfless and kind to everyone. But sometimes- a lot of the time- I want time for myself too. To read a book, to travel, to have fun. Oh, God, this is turning into a whine fest.
Take on what is mine to take on, and leave what is not mine alone. I would like to get control of why I put things in my mouth, and feed my body and soul rather than my anxiety. I would like to improve my mental health / anxiety level / faith and happiness.
I want to work at accepting what is, without resistance.
I'd like to pick up new skills and get fitter. Advice. Just do it!
Save $5k. Body weight <140. Build a "Do Anything" body. Love myself enough everyday to move my body, rest my mind and express my soul.
Just last night Joanne, the new person in our group, worked with me in an exercise. Her questioning - Do you feel alone? - got to my core issue. I don't believe I have others. I believe I have to 'do it all myself'. Pouf! or is it Poof!? I feel that meeting with the Twitches is a path to relying on and learning from and with others, something I've foolishly and selfishly held myself above. I feel so comfortable and open to these women. I think this is a way to improve myself and relationships.
Be positive. Believe in miracles. Make the world a better place. Grace and gratitude!
There is a song by George Ezra, called Blame It On Me. I've heard it a thousand times, but only in the past couple of weeks has it resonated with me, and only since I actually sat and read the lyrics just now do I feel like it was written for me. This is my inspiration to do what I want in this next year, without feeling guilty about always trying to make others happy.
Live the best life! And I always do. I would just like to become more aware about what I love, loathe and feel as a human, and become more spiritually aware. I would love to master meditation :)
I'd like to be less anxious and more focuses this next year. Best advice I can think of: anxiety/depression lie, what your brain thinks in any given moment is not a hard fact of belief, and that time'll get you through the bad feelings and you just gotta stay cool.
Be more honest with myself and others. Learn how to communicate more clearly in difficult and conflict situations.
I want to live more fully and boldly. I want to dream bigger dreams for myself, and make significant achievements in a few focused areas. Best advice? "Ask for what you want."
Calm Be calm
I think Baby #2 (due Feb 15) is going to make life very interesting :) I want to make sure I take the time to enjoy all the little things that are important with my family. I read a great article from a mom who was always trying to hurry her kids, and she realizes that she's missing out on the real stuff. I hope I can embrace the moment and minimize the hurrying.
Go to art school, just go, if it fails it fails. Shit happens life goes on.