Describe a significant experience that has happened in the past year. How did it affect you? Are you grateful? Relieved? Resentful? Inspired?

No significant experiences this year.

Tripped over the dog and broke my left wrist. It made me feel frustrated, helpless, old and angry.

Doing the Machon leadership program at URJ Eisner Camp. It gave me real life experience on how to be responsible for others. I feel grateful and can't wait to go back next year hopefully as a counselor and instructor.

nothing significant. It is clear that I work for a company that doesnt really care about its employees, and my boss is a 12 year old who has no management skills but his dad owns the company, it is what it is.

A significant experience in this last year was going to Thailand for five weeks to do a yoga teacher training, learn about Buddhism, and meditate and chant. It was a massive part of my grieving and healing process around Dad. I found some ground somehow under my feet again. I think with all the sitting with and feeling the pain of the loss, it opened up to new layers of me and what matters in my life and allowed me to reconnect to earth again.

I was part of a writing team for a sitcom. It was an amazing and inspiring experience, as well as hard work.

I can either think about the things that I changed, or things that just *happened*. The things that just *happened* didn't really affect me that much. Like my uncle getting cancer, of course it doesn't leave me unaffected, but there are so many people closer to him and more involved, that I don't have to do a lot about it. Something really significant that I changed this year was quitting my job. That gave me tons of different emotions. Of course I am happy, or else I wouldn't have wanted to quit. It is also frightening to not know where I want my life to go from now on. It's confusing. My goals in life are changing massively. It makes me sad to leave and jealous of my successor who is all fresh and new in the job. I'm also happy that I could really make this decision for myself.

My biggest experiences in the last year were my travels. I started with going to the USA, and the country just blew my mind. I haven't been that impressed with a country in a very long time in my adult life. I first thought it was because of the whole it being a Dan experience, but - surprisingly enough - I got to go a second time within the year. And the magic is still there. The inspiring feeling that you can do ANYTHING. Colombia was a second impressive one - also because it was my first solo trip. Seeing a non-first world country and meeting the locals changed my life. Meeting German and his family. Doing something that is completely outside my comfort zone and that everyone thinks is a crazy thing to do. I just had so much fun.

Le mariage ... je pense que c’est l’zxperiznce la plus marquante de mon année 2018. On dit que le mariage évidemment ce n’est pas le jour J de la fête mais une vie ensemble et c’est vrai ... mais malgré tout cette journée reste en nous comme une expérience unique. Je pense qu’elle a assez bien reflétée la dynamique de notre couple. J’ai été leader sur l’organisation c’est clair et parfois je me suis sentie seule et je lui en ai voulu d’avoir à le micro manager... mais la journée que dis je la semaine a été exceptionnelle ! Parfaitement organisée.. aucune fausse note. Un rêve. Je suis vraiment grateful de cette expérience. Nous avons été tellement bien entourés. Les discours de nos familles, de nos amis ont été tellement dingues.. tout s’est passé à la perfection nous avons eu droit à un temps splendide et je pense que tout le monde a vécu un petit rêve. Ça m’inspire aussi en partie, parce que ça me donne des idées ? Est ce que devenir wedding planner c’est vraiment une idée à la noix ? Je ne sais pas. En tout cas j’aime cet univers du mariage. Mais est ce que 30 ans c’est pas trop tard pour se lancer ?

My boss went on parental leave and I chose to take on his role, which was both challenging and rewarding. I moved house and got my first own home, which was a huge relief and a great source of gratitude. I love my new home! My parents moved down south. I started showing signs of my mother’s blood illness and I acted on it and went to the doctors. Still haven’t gotten my test results back, but I’m proud that I went.

Within the last year I've started Remote Year. This experience has been.. wild. I've experienced a range of emotion from excitement, to overwhelmed, to loneliness, to strength. It's all going by so fast. I am so grateful for the opportunity, and hope I can learn to enjoy myself over the rest of the year.

Donated a kidney. It was an awesome experience! It showed me that doing something I was nervous about can turn out great. It showed me that being brave is doing something even if you're scared.

As a result of an unexpected social encounter, I really grasped that my brain functions legitimately differently than is true for most of my peers. I've always 'known' that, but I don't think I really grasped it as real or understood what that means. It means I go into situations with different expectations and needs. My expectations or needs aren't a failure to understand how the conventional world works, they are simply my expectations and needs in the world. I don't have to align with others; I need to learn to articulate my perspective as valid, and not as an apology. I am grateful, I am relieved. I'm nervous, but I'm inspired to work at carving out my path, unapologetically.

This past year my life has changed a lot and I have had many experiences. One of the most significant was graduating from college, getting a job and moving out on my own. All three of these experiences go together. It made me change my perspective on how lucky I am so have such supportive parents who always help me. I am beyond grateful for all the guidance they and all of my friends gave to me throughout this time of my life. I learned a lot about myself and who I am through this time in my life.

I helped a friend take up the practice of blowing shofar. I felt grateful for having the practice myself and joyful to share with someone who has been kind to me.

My boyfriend’s father suddenly passed away earlier this year. It made me reflect on my loved ones and think about what really matters in the grand scheme of things.

Starting my job at LA Plaza (Feb 2018). Becoming a curator in a small, community-oriented history museum is a dream in many ways, but also a nightmare in a few. I’m so grateful to Erin for taking a chance on me, and to Janine and Esperanza for teaching me so much already. I’m humbled by how much I now know I don’t know—about myself as a professional, about this history, and about my own community. It inspires me to learn more and show up as best I can every day. I know that my career is going to be even brighter from here on out because of this job.

I got married:) I'm very grateful for this blessing and humbled by the amount of work I have to do to build a beautiful and strong marriage.

In the past year I moved to another city for the very first time in my life. I moved from Sydney to Canberra to take up a job for the Executive Council of Australian Jewry. I remember having a choice between taking this job or taking another with the NSW Jewish Board of Deputies back in Sydney. It was a Friday night after I had received both offers and my Mum and I were visiting my grandfather in hospital after he had a surgery and I realised then that the Canberra job was scarier but it was what I wanted. And moving was scary. The first 6 weeks when I didn’t know anyone were particularly nerve wracking. But I put myself out there and really tried to make friends and now I have weekly social engagements and people I miss whenever I head back to Sydney. I am also really liking Canberra itself and can imagine living here for a few years although definitely not forever.

My father passed away in December 2017. He was 84 years old, and he had made a choice not to pursue aggressive treatment for multiple serious ailments. He was ready and he was at peace. He got to be at home, as he wished, with excellent hospice care. He had a wonderful, long life and there were no regrets. I live in a different state, but I was able to travel to be with him for his last 6 weeks, and the time when he suffered acutely was mercifully fairly short. It was the grand finale of a spectacularly terrible year for me: the year in which my husband went through cancer treatment, our rental property business became a money-sucking nightmare, and we experienced a disrupted adoption. Surprisingly, my father's death was the least traumatic of these events. It was certainly far less traumatic than my mother's death in 2000, which was cruelly premature. It was a very paradoxical experience; I was profoundly sad to lose my only living parent. I wanted more time with him. We didn't always communicate well, and there are so many things I wish I could have asked him and shared with him. It was heart-wrenching to watch him suffer and decline. At the same time, I was grateful that if he had to die at this time, the process went about as well as it could have, short of simply dying peacefully in his sleep, which is honestly what I pray for for myself and everyone I love. The only downside to a sudden yet peaceful death is that your loved ones don't have the opportunity to say goodbye. We had that, and I'm grateful for it, though I would gladly have given it up if it meant him not having to suffer at all. For me, being home for so long was a wonderful experience. I got to spend quality time with close friends and relatives I don't get to see nearly as often as I would like. I felt so loved and supported and cared for. Recently, my husband and I looked up conversation-starting questions, and one of them was, "If you could re-live one day of your life over and over, which one would it be?" We both thought of our wedding day first. But after that, I said that honestly, either the day my father died or the day of his memorial service came to mind. On both of those days, I was surrounded by love. The day Dad died, everyone immediately came to the house and spent the day with my brother and me, and it was wonderful. Dad's memorial service was attended by about 200 people, and it was beautiful. It was also the only time that my brother, sister, their spouses and children, my husband, stepson and I have all been together in the same place. My stepson and my nieces and nephews enjoyed hanging out together, and it was lovely to see. It made me wish we didn't all live so far apart. Since Dad died, I have struggled a bit with questioning whether I'm grieving "right." Of course, I know from the experience of losing my mom that there is no one right way. But I've been surprised by this process, because it has a positive side as well as the expected painful part. In recent years, as Dad began to have more health issues, I've worried about him and about how things would ultimately go for him. He never wanted to be in a nursing home, dependent or bed-bound and unable to do the things he enjoyed. I am so grateful that he was able to avoid that. I feel tremendous relief that his death went well. I feel guilty for feeling relieved; I feel like I'm supposed to be more devastated than I am, the way I was when I lost my mother. But it's different. I'm sad, and I miss him, and I wish we had had more time together. But mostly I just feel grateful for the life he had and everything he did for me and our family. He was a good man. So many people have difficult relationships with parents, or no relationship, and it breaks my heart, because everyone should have good parents like mine. I have been incredibly fortunate.

When the year began, I was working a full-time job as an architect, a part-time job as a photographer/editor, and was also, once in a while, handling a few personal projects on the side. I'd been juggling these jobs for a few months already, around 5-6, but working a number of things at the same time was far from new to me. I'd been a workaholic since college, dabbling in a number of extra-curricular activities, holding leadership positions, volunteering in student council, etc. I enjoyed every bit of it. I loved being busy, attending to people, and making sure things were done well and on time. Needless to say, it was exhausting. Fulfilling but exhausting. I’m sure I won’t have any problems recalling this event because it is a major factor in how my 2018 is currently going. One night, on my way home from the studio, I fell asleep on the wheel. I had just crossed an intersection and was going pretty fast when that second of shut-eye was abruptly interrupted by one of the most terrifying sounds I have ever heard– a woman screaming for dear life. I had hit the tricycle in front of me carrying a full load of five people, putting all of them, in a much longer night than any of them would have anticipated. I stepped out of my car to the horror of seeing a salt-and-pepper haired man lying under the hood of my car, inches away from my front wheels. “I killed him,” I thought in a haze and panic. I didn’t. But almost. Of the five passengers in that tiny tricycle, only the driver was injured. I don’t know how it happened but he was knocked off the motorcycle leaving the passengers to fend for themselves and steer themselves to safety. One of the other passengers knew how to maneuver a motorcycle and I am so grateful for that. None of them were hurt. The driver had a deep wound on his right elbow as he held up his arms to protect his head from the crash. I am grateful beyond words that the driver and his wife and children were so gracious, kind, and understanding. “Aksidente yun, Nina. Walang may gustong mangyari yun. Mag-iingat ka na lang next time. At ‘wag kang masyadong magtrabaho, bata ka pa naman.” Remembering their words brings tears to my eyes. My dad said it is out of my privilege that I am free and that they did not file any cases against my recklessness. And I believe he’s right. If I, or any of my brothers, were run over, hit, injured out of recklessness, I know they would raise hell against the offender. They would not allow that offender to run free. Of course, I had to cover all expenses but that’s nothing compared to losing your freedom because of a crime. My dad was livid. He couldn’t talk to me. It was a few days until he finally calmed himself down to be able to review everything that had just happened and how I was expected to move forward. Because he believes that it is out of privilege that I am free, he decided that he would act as both counsel and executioner on behalf of the man I carelessly injured. I was sentenced to one year of house arrest. The terms were as follows: 1. I would quit my photography job to focus on building my career in architecture. 2. I would not be allowed to have multiple jobs¬ or side projects. I needed one job and that alone. 3. I would not be allowed to bring my car. 4. I had to be home after work by 7:30pm just in time for our dinner. 5. I was not allowed to attend any social events. Not on weekdays, not on weekends. 6. I was allowed to have friends visit me at home, as with regular prisoners. This was implemented in January. It’s September now and he’s let up a little. I’ve been allowed to bring a car twice a week. This month, I’ve had to drive my family twice on a weekend. I’m allowed to go to the gym after work but still need to be home before dinner. That’s about it. At first, I was extremely miserable. The first two weeks after the accident were the worst. I already felt guilty about it and I had my dad constantly reminding me that it was all my fault and that I had caused other people to suffer. It was horrible. He made me choose one job. I reasoned out that I had just gotten my architecture license and wanted to try to give my passion a chance. I wanted to try working on photography, something I’ve been wanting to do for over ten years at this point. He accepted it but made it clear he was unhappy with my decision. The following night, he said he couldn’t accept my decision anymore and that he needed to steer me in the correct direction as I was falling off my path. I didn’t study photography, I studied architecture. In my head, I answered back, “I didn’t study photography because you didn’t let me.” But that’s as far as it goes. I was in no position to answer back. No matter how calm I could get myself to say it, I knew he wouldn’t listen. Having to say goodbye to the studio felt like being a little girl learning how to ride a bike and hitting a wall. I was just starting to get it. I was just starting to be myself, letting loose, just starting to see that I deserved to be there, to grow there, learn the craft, and because of the lovely work environment they had, even learn to be a better person too. I ended up transferring jobs completely. There was an opening at a nearer office, with a higher offer, as well. It was more convenient in all ways. I took it and bid farewell to both my jobs at San Juan and went back to Quezon City. Around the middle of the year, maybe a little before, I had already completely accepted that the year wasn’t how I intended it to be and that I needed to reassess what I could do about it. I slowly changed my mindset from focusing on all the things I could have been doing that I wasn’t allowed to into finding how I can make the most of my situation. I’ve been focusing a lot on my health in all aspects– emotionally, psychologically, physically. And at least for that, I am grateful.

We separated, but keep in daily touch. I have feelings of abandonment and a gaping sense of loss. I feel like I've lost my family and the future is uncertain. Friends have been wonderful, reminded me that I am alive and that life goes on. Sometimes I am a shadow of my former self, and sometimes parts of the new me peek through the facade and give me a sliver of hope.

We celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary. Am grateful we were able to reach this milestone. We have made it through life's journey of good times and bad times. It reminded us of all those times and brought back many memories. Where have all the years gone.

Parents move to my town. Resentful.

I went to Brazil semi-solo and I traveled solo internationally. It affected me by broadening my horizons. Although it had some dangerous possibilities I didn't let fear hold me back. I proved to myself that I can travel and experience new adventures and grow. I am grateful that I was able to travel to Brazil and learn about the country, their culture and meet new interesting people. I was very relieved upon receiving my Brazilian visa and also my travel immuniaztions that caused no side effects. I am inspired to travel wherever my heart desires.

In June of this past year, I attended the Young Living International Convention in Utah. It was incredibly inspiring. I am incredibly grateful for that experience, on multiple levels. That trip confirmed my belief in the company & the business path I am on. It was also a special time for me to bond with some truly awesome ladies (and gentlemen) that I am building friendships with. My presence at Convention gave me the opportunity to book an Alaskan cruise; stepping out of my financial comfort zone.

became handicapped. made me stay home not grateful bored

Where do I begin....this year...I experienced such doubt and regret and confusion and a real sense of severing from self. Now, adrift and alone on a "beach" with no shore, I am learning once again what it means to nourish my self, and listen more deeply than I have ever listened before to my inner wisdom.

Alan died Jan 29. I am sad, not grateful, a bit relieved because he was failing and in limbo. I think he was the meaning of my life so now I have to find new meaning.

This year has been full of change. Among other things, we bought a new house in smaller center away from the traffic, noise, crowding and expense of Toronto. Our new house is my dream house, and we have spent the last few month working at painting, decorating and renovating. I am so so energized by by being outside the city. We have truly entered a new phase!

I finally consulted a lawyer about getting a divorce. The best investment I’ve ever made. I’m now separated and happier than I’ve been in years.

My mentor, my former supervisor, passed away from cancer. It was somewhat expected, but I didn't think it would impact me as much as it did. In my 3+ years living in Seattle, she taught me so much and was a great friend as well. I really regret not being as in touch with her in her final weeks and days. I didn't know it was a serious as it was, and I never got to really thank her for everything she did for me. I tend to shut down when people I know are dying, and I don't want to accept the fact that it's happening, but it's left me feeling incomplete and regretting not saying a proper goodbye. However, at the same time, I feel like I've been stronger in my work since her passing, as I feel like that's what she would've wanted me to do - keep going and showing those around me that there's so much out there and not to ever give up on your passions and dreams.

This year after being unemployed for 6 months I finally found a job. I am very grateful and it is allowing me to feel a great sense of relief. The job is challenging but it was wonderful to have a place to go every day and make a difference.

My sister Sharon was diagnosed and treated for breast and endinetrial cancer. The reality of it was difficult for me to accept. I am so grateful that she has been given a positive prognosis, grateful that she has been spared difficult and harmful treatment, and grateful that I have her in my life

My mom asked my dad and me if we think she could have a cell phone. She was embarrassed and nervous that we would find it silly, but we didn't- in fact, we had both thought of it ourselves. My dad went and got her the phone, and I remember making my first call to her and thinking I would never be able to call my mom again in our lives. It makes me feel very grateful but also inspired, because truly we can never say never and never predict the future. I don't want to jump the gun and say "I will never.." because also I had a surgery this year that changed something I had thought was permanent.

In April, I kissed someone. Someone who is not my husband. I felt relieved and overwhelmed. And wanted, desired. And young- it made me feel young again.

A spot for a tennis coach opened up at a local high school and I was offered the position. It gave my daughter a place to practice and play tennis and it gives me the opportunity to instill a love of tennis in a group of girls. I'm extremely grateful for the opportunity!

Being kicked to the curb in spite of totally killing a job for 9 months, in the process learning that the reason I was kicked is because I uncovered fiscal malfeasance. "Defeated" is too mild a term.

I’m grateful to have married my love this year. It took me so long to find my loving life partner and he’s so full of love! And he’s very handsome :)

I’ve secured a new job. I felt I was pushed to look for another post as I hadn’t yet reached the required performance indicator (despite being out of action due to gallbladder removal and high level of teaching compared with colleagues) and I was being put under pressure for that alongside being bullied by a new co-worker. I am glad I was able to find a new job that is a significant promotion but I also feel a huge amount of resentment and frustration that I wasn’t supported by line manager. We moved to be closer to my work and now I have a huge commute. I feel deep sadness and trying to focus on the positive promotion and opportunities that might bring!

Sarah was fired, which made her act out like crazy with all of us, all while denying that she was suffering. It exhausted me, and made me feel less sympathetic. And now that she has a job, I hope she will begin to make a life that decentralizes me. On the other hand, I am feeling more confident than I have ever felt -- about my teaching, my ideas, my opinions. Which helps me work with and around the emotions of others. I feel more worthy than I have ever felt -- at 62! Separation from my mother and sisters helps, as does standing up to Mike in less aggressive and confrontative ways. I think I have internalized so much of what the Me, Too movement has to teach me. It has changed me deeply.

Skiing in Chile in August. Very grateful and inspired.

I joined a local group called 2018 or Bust and have gone canvassing once a month for the Democratic candidate in our nearest Republican House district. I feel proud of myself for doing something to support the checks and balances of my country. I feel less helpless since I think I'm doing something that makes a difference.

I resigned from my managerial position. Initially, I was relieved but I do miss the challenges that come with doing something involving so many moving pieces. At times, I am grateful and relieved though other times, I am resentful because the circumstances did not allow me to truly do things on my own terms.

My Daughter asked to move in with me. Really emotional since at one point I thought I might never see her again. Watching her grow up makes growing older every day a priviledge.

I received my expungement this year, and I was incredibly relieved. It took me a lot of effort, mobility, time, money, energy, emotional energy, and support to finally receive it. And honestly, I started the process not long after HHD last year. I resent that it took so long to receive the expungement, but I'm truly relieved to be cleansing myself and moving forward into the light.

My boyfriend and I decided to cohabitate. I was nervous at first, but the moving process was smooth. So far it has been great waking up and falling asleep with him every night. Occasionally I observe or experience interactions that make me think about the future. Then I try to pull it back to the present. Overall, I feel grateful and loved.

A significant experience that happened in the past year is that I was invited to join the governing board of the local community theatre. This is significant for multiple reasons. First, I feel like it was the first time someone outside of the organization recognized my talents and hard work. Second, this is important because it allows me to help the theater community in some way, even if I can't work there.

I got my first full time job and for one of the first times in my life I feel like I'm truly progressing towards the kind of success that i often dream of.

I began my second year of vet school just about a month ago. Once deciding to go to vet school, it took me nearly six years and three applications to finally get in. First year was a rough and bumpy ride and I often questioned my decision. So far this year is off to a much better start and I have no doubt that I am exactly where I need to be. I sill hate Baton Rouge and go back home to New Orleans every chance I get it, but I know these next 3 years will fly by and I can’t wait to be able to experience the freedom that comes with not living off of student loans or paycheck to paycheck.

So, my career as a professor seems to be developing. I was offered a second class to teach. There are trade-offs here, but honestly I think it'll be worth it.

My oldest child graduated from high school. She has moved across the country and is training for her career. It felt like the umbilical cord has been cut again. Very difficult transition for me. I am grateful she is confident on her own and has the ability to do what she loves most.

I was diagnosed with HIV on September 22, 2017. This was scary, though not entirely unexpected. While I had quit using drugs almost 6 months before, I hadn't changed many of the behaviors that came with the drug use...up all night, looking for random sex, not using protection, etc. But getting this diagnosis changed my life. It shook me to my spiritual core, causing me to really decide if I should change everything about the way I was living. While I was resentful at first, I'm actually relieved to have this disease and be on medication for it. Now, like Forrest Gump would say, it's one less thing.

Both of my sons have had serious health challenges. I'm not usually someone who's inclined to worry but this had me feeling scared, confused and depressed, especially since they don't live in the same city. I'm grateful that I had some good distractions during that time, and extremely relieved and grateful that they both had some positive outcomes.

I had gotten a full time job in the middle of October last year. I was excited because it seemed it was going to be stress free and a nice way to make money. I eventually was promoted because of the good work I was doing and was offered a raise. Unfortunately, the promotion was not what I expected and my daughter was getting sick all the time from being in daycare. I was soon fired. It taught me so much. It taught me that being a working mom is tough, but doable. It taught me that my daughter is the most important thing in my life no matter how much I’m making. And it also taught me how know what something just isn’t right for me. I feel blessed for that experience. I’m currently a stay at home mom, and while it’s stressful at times I’m super grateful to be able to watch my baby girl grow!

National Youth Conference. Chaperoning my Youth Group there was a life changing experience.

I published my first book and have actually sold some! Now that I've overcome the "first time" hurdle, I'm eager to start my next book and hope to publish it in 2019.

Two come immediately to mind... my hip replacement surgery and Dafnah's wedding... About the first I am relieved, grateful but disappointed that the results haven't yet been as much as I'd hoped for but yet I am not surprised... hoped for and expected aren't the same... Dafnah's wedding was so much more than I expected and I am so grateful and inspired (to pick two of the words in the question)... the ceremony was the most blessed event that I have experienced in a long time... went way beyond anything I imagined or was afraid to imagine... the feelings were so loving... between them and all of us... Talya (Dafnah's friend who officiated) was amazing... and the whole weekend was a joy even with my physical limitations... even having to miss part of the party babysitting for Maayan and Gali while they finally went to bed didn't take away from it all... more than anything I am grateful...

I got married. I feel deeply grateful almost every day for having Dannie as my life partner.

I realized my parents are aging and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. The power dynamics shifted a bit and they’ve started to become more dependent on my advice and expertise. I’m grateful that I and my sister are here to help. Happy that I know so I can adjust. And inspired to live my fullest life.

We moved! Out of our first apartment together and into a bigger one. It's bittersweet to leave behind the place where we decorated our first Christmas tree, got engaged, adopted our first pets, confessed failures, grieved and celebrated as a family for two years. I will always love that apartment. But I am so excited to be in a new place. It is beautiful, closer to work and my mom, feels more homey and "grown-up," and has a second bedroom. That second bedroom is so important, as it represents the family we're hoping to start together. The whole home just feels like a place where our lives are becoming real. With our wedding less than a month away, it feels like the perfect time for a fresh start. I've been inspired to actually decorate and to become a better housekeeper and hostess. We actually have the space to have people over now, and we even bought a beautiful, 70 year old kitchen table!

I told Michael that I love him. I don't know how I feel about it. I'm still struggling with it - do I really love him? Would I miss him - him, specifically - if somehow he weren't here? Is he just ("just") an interchangeable person in my "I love " slot? Would my answer be different - or my wrestling with this be different - if he told me he loves me? (Answer: probably not.) Would my struggles be lessened if we weren't on the verge of a rut right now - both of us at risk of falling into old, comfortable, maybe-functional/maybe-not-functional patterns and habits? I don't know. I smile when I see him, and that's not just sex. But is this familiarity, and lack of risk? And/or is it the risk of me being vulnerable and him being less so (re: him struggling with the notion of love and so not saying he loves me) that draws me in; and would I be less attracted to this relationship if his vulnerability increased? All good questions. And - I think I'll talk about this with him*. Specifically, the falling-into-a-rut/into-old-patterns part. Until I started to respond to this question, I wasn't sure how much I was struggling with these questions; but for this to be my go-to-event for 10Q - that says to me this is a bigger issue that I need to address. * [Which, btw, every time I re-read this part of the answer, makes me smile. Because, you know, I *can* talk about this with him. Without risk of offending, or ruining, or even yelling or discovering things I don't want to discover. And part of that is him. So maybe I'm spinning about nothing. who knows?? Thinking about talking about this with Michael makes me smile. It just does.] -- I do think that the relationship solidifying is probably THE most significant event for me, though. It's a big deal, regardless of how much I muddle through my feelings about it. I've come from a much less secure place into a solid, this-is-real-and-not-going-away feeling; and that's pretty big.

I had a baby! It’s been the biggest change, well, ever! It’s made me rediscover myself and find myself and abilities I never knew I had in me. Rewarding is such a bland word. Arthur is... my heart outside my body.

Becoming a mother has changed me, in ways I still don’t know and in ways it hasn’t yet. It has made me feel both more love and, at times, emptier than I could have imagined. It’s fundamentally altered my most important relationships. I have lost so much sleep and gained a lot more patience.

I had a cancerous tumor and a major surgery to remove it. I realized that I’m stronger than I thought and that my body takes longer to heal than I thought. I’m grateful to be alive but angry that this happened.

I found myself in a role I never did before, and nothing prepared me for it. For about six months it took all my energy and it only recently ended. I'm still processing how I feel about it, and what I can learn from the experience.

This past year the Parkland shooting happened. Waiting to watch Casey come out the building was terrifying. Between the Parkland shooting, the current state of our government and my family's desire for social justice has inspired me to become active in the democracy rather than feeling powerless. I was inspired to become the youth leader for SDA and take action to reduce gun violence, inspired to get 18-26 year olds to vote and inspired to learn more about the issues that affect the citizens of America. I am very grateful to have been born into the class that I am in, grateful for my connections and grateful for the friendships I have as a result, but feel a sense of responsibility to advocate.

We moved back into our house. Huge amounts of stress and drama leading up to taking possession and then a ton of work and money to repair damages. I am so grateful to be out of the apartment and have space of my own again. Discouraged about all of the things that still need to be fixed, with less and less money available, which all puts stress on our marriage. Overall, though, this has been a good thing. If nothing else, my husband has demonstrated that he truly loves me, with all he has been willing to sacrifice and give to make this happen.

Moved to Florida. I don't particularly love this move, but it had to be done.

There were two significant experiences in my life this years, both of which were losses. Last June, my oldest and dearest friend of 50 years was diagnosed with Stage IV, inoperable, non-small-cell lung cancer. She lived about 2,000 miles away, but we had maintained a friendship of distance after graduating from college. She had treatment which was successful for a while, and then the inevitable journey to the end of her life began in earnest. I was with her in the 10 days before she died, and at her side most of the time the two days before and never left her until she breathed her final breath on July 7, 2018. I am relieved that her suffering is over. I am angry at the way she compartmentalized and hid large parts of her life from her family and friends. I am astounded that such an intelligent woman could leave her affairs in such disarray that it will take two years in probate in two states to sort out. I am astonished by her secret fantasy life, which was no fantasy to her, and deeply saddened by knowing that so much was missing from her real life that she needed these fantasies to feel loved and fulfilled. I am awed by the powerful mitzvah of bearing witness to death, and proud of myself for being completely in the moment when I was with her. But mostly I am overwhelmed by the fact that she is gone forever . Although this pales by comparison, my best local buddy moved to Florida to be with her daughter, a single parent in the Navy. I miss her every day. At least I can call her. Which I cannot do for the friend who died, even though I say to myself “I wish I could share this with P” at least once a day.

I took a trip to Vancouver to visit a friend and her girlfriend. The trip was a huge confidence booster for me because I learned that I could navigate the city on my own. I learned how to take public transit. And I learned how full of experiences my days could be. It made me want more of that feeling of freedom & self-confidence in my "regular" life. I had a conversation with my friend's girlfriend where she challenged me about how I often felt like I needed to manage my wife's emotions. She suggested that sort of managing isn't really respectful or trusting. After I returned from the trip, my wife and I decided to end our relationship. That conversation & the sense of freedom & self-confidence I got from the trip were largely responsible for my part of that decision. I was also just incredibly grateful to be able to spend that time with my friend. We had so many truly wonderful moments together.

Depression worsened. Very frustrating. I feel immobilized. Much of it is due to the situation in the world and the US changing policies; I am clinging to the hope we have time to stop that train. and the rest is how that interacts with my own journey in overcoming the abuse from my childhood. As a woman the world is not getting better. Some friends don't understand; others are wonderful. But I do feel more isolated than i have in the past.

We sold the house we'd lived in for 24 years, and moved into a brand new house in Hermiston. It was a wrenching experience - leaving the town I love (though I still work there) and the house the kids grew up in was difficult; coming to terms with the loss of my hopes of early retirement and lots of travel in the next 10 years was much more difficult. However, I love the space, light and fresh start that the new house has provided, and I am hopeful that this will be the right decision for both of us.

My mother died. It has been, and continues to be, a startling thing. Bits of trauma unravel themselves. Sometimes I miss her. Sometimes I am amazed and aghast at the amount of sheer energy it has taken to cope with the change. I knew years before she died that I had no idea what it would be like for me when she died. I'm grateful that I knew that, and that I didn't try to go into the experience with too much in the way of expectations about what it would be like. Mostly it has been exhausting and perplexing. Grief is such a strange beast, and it rises and ebbs on a schedule that seems to have little to do with anything. I never know when I will have a day where the least thing will make me weep, not because I miss her or wish she were still alive, not because there's anything actually going on at all that has to do with her or with death... but just because there is so much grief and sometimes it spills over because of everything and nothing. Because I'm tired. Because I feel suddenly inadequate to the day I'm having. Because I am frustrated. Because the dog is so needy and sweet and I start crying while I hold her. In many ways my mother's death has been a very, very good thing to have happen. I am still figuring out what my life can be -- and maybe will be -- without that overwhelming presence and that overwhelming human being taking up all the air in the room so much of the time.

My Nathan got married to a wonderful girl, Sahara. I believe that was the happiest I've been in a very long time. To see him achieve this milestone, I was very grateful to be there. I thought my heart was going to burst with pride and happiness for them both. I was and still am thankful to the Lord for bring him this far! and allowing me to witness it.

My girlfriend and I broke up after 3 years. It was probably in a making at least a year before. I think both relieved and sad. Of course, the end of a relationship is usually not going to be happy, but since we were living in different states, the time component was not indicative of a couple that live in the same city. I think we will both be better off for it.

Depression smeshion. I am very tired. I have the best therapist though, she gives me hope.. :)

My mother died from gastric cancer. We weren’t close, but I think that had a lot to do with me and not with her. Since she has passed, I come across notes from her that show me she really did care a lot more for me than I believed. This breaks my heart because all she likely wanted was a relationship with me, and I resisted that because of false perceptions of her. I’m sure she forgave me for my absence, and so now I am working on forgiving myself.

I began a new chapter in my career, one that is significantly more satisfying and challenging than any other work I’ve done previously. I feel deeply grateful for the change and for my feeling of belonging; and a sense of satisfaction knowing I’m making a difference for others and using my talents to help them.

My father-in-law passed way suddenly. He had successful cancer surgery with a risky technique, but apparently it was so aggressive that it came back within four months. He was given 3-5 months to live, and then he died four days later. It was a very sobering experience. A lot of tears between me and my wife (her mother had died 10 years prior, and she was now an orphan) on a daily basis for several weeks. Months of going through his house and deciding what to keep, sell , throw and give away. Dealing with the legalities, mortgage company, and car loan company was tough. His estate was worthless, and all he had for life insurance was a $10,000 policy. Most of which went to the funeral home. I've realized that just because I might think that something is special, meaningful or has value, that doesn't mean it is true. He saved everything, and I mean everything. My wife had to look at each and every piece of paper. In the end she kept 10% of it. I am downsizing my things now and I feel a sense of relief.

Seeing my baby grow and ask questions like: "we learned a bit about Jesus in school while talking about history. Do you think he was real?" and "what do you think is worse, slavery or segregation?" she is able to really think and put difficult concepts together. I have worked to deal with my hashimotos this year. I am so much healthier than i was a year ago and am so grateful that my family is so supportive.

In the last year, we decided to take on Deanna. We had done visits and committed to raising all three siblings. TPR happened in May and we are waiting on adoption. It has been incredibly challenging and I still don’t know if we made the right decision. It’s getting better but very slowly. I think just having three kids means constant chaos.

In the last year, I started to open up to friends and family about the sexual assault I’ve experienced in college. It was extremely difficult at first, because it was something I was denying myself for so long. I finally allowed myself to feel the pain and heartbreak that I’ve been pushing down for over 4 years. I’m still recovering and battling with my emotions over this. It’s not easy to think about, and I’m not sure if it’ll ever get to a point where it is easy. I still find myself looking over my shoulder, and questioning my truth or my value. Today I feel grateful for my mom who has been my light during this heeling process. She feels my pain and she is the most sensitive toward my feelings. I hope I can use my voice one day to inspire others to stand up against sexual harassment or violence.

Became a grand aunt, which is lovely. I’m grateful to my sister for having her son and to him for having this baby. It is wonderful having a baby in the family again. Along with my sister, my best friend became a grandmother too, just as they became mothers at the same time 32 years ago. I am grateful to these two women I love and to the wonderful young men they raised - with the tiniest bit of help from me. My sister wants to be called Bubbie - in contrast with my mother, who was horrified at becoming a grandmother because it meant she was getting old, and it was too much more to worry about, and she certainly didn’t want to be called Bubbie. As with the contrast in their parenting styles, so we see the contrast between my sister and my mom in grand parenting style. Joy and pride in her son v. selfishness and aggravation.

We got pregnant again, B is going to have a little brother any day now. I am grateful that we were able to get pregnant in the window of time I tracked before the next session starts, and I’m incredibly grateful that we didn’t experience the secondary infertility I’ve been reading so much about lately. I’m a little overwhelmed by the thought of 2 boys 15 months apart, but I’m really hopeful they’ll end up being best friends for life.

My husband and I took a wise aging class led by our Rabbi. Not only was the class a catalyst for beginning to make peace with my past, as well as a great way to get to know new people on a deeper level, but it springboarded us into more active participation in our Shul which has proved to be an inspiring experience.

I visited family and friends over a period of two weeks. I saw my dad and stepmom. That trip had almost been cancelled by my dad, who cited "personal issues" that made my coming untenable. He wouldn't be specific. However, I'm convinced the personal issues are his right wing political views which overshadow his commitment to family and obliterate any chance of exposure to a perspective outside his own. I was struck by how conservative talk show radio and Fox News were omnipresent in their household. This is the essence of their lives now. I struggled to find any photos of family. None of me, but one of J stuffed in a drawer. That's it. I spend over an hour practicing my singing at one point. They never commented on that, as though it didn't happen. The topics raised were not family matters (or, if so, only minimally) but things that mattered such as whether Antifa were Nazis, whether the pope was competent given that he supported contraception, and whether the crusades were caused my invading muslims. When I visited my mother, I was shocked at her appearance. She's pulled out the hair from the front half of her head, including eyebrows. Trichotillomania is the name of the condition--that word lets me intellectualize it a bit, softening the horror. Mom's becoming demented. She sat me down and asked me to explain whether I'm her son by birth or whether she adopted me as a child from C, my ex-wife. On the other hand, I visited my daughter, J. She and her husband are doing wonderfully. They're happy and engaged in their education and friends. At one point, I noticed linear scars on her legs and asked about them. "I used to cut myself," she told me. I was so scared for her back then and so relieved that she seems to have overcome the terrible woes that plagued her. I also visited my old piano teacher, Bill, who I haven't seen in over a decade. He's looking quite aged, but he's still sharp as a tack and he was so happy to see me. I played Chopin's Barcarolle for him and, despite the mistakes, which were plentiful, he thought it was beautiful. That made me really happy. I'm grateful for having had Bill in my life. In some respects, he was the father figure I lacked, growing up. Years ago, Bill had told me about our piano lineage. Amazingly, he knows not only his teacher's name, but who that person's teacher was, going back nine "generations." The path goes back to Franz Liszt, Beethoven and Haydn, Arthur Schnabel and Leonard Shure. So, I too have a connection to those people. No, it doesn't really matter, it doesn't make my any better a pianist, but it's not only fun to know, it somehow let's me feel grounded. I'm relieved for J and inspired by her ability to overcome the terrible psychological burden she endured. I feel resent toward my dad. How can he not know me as a person and who could he waste what little time we have together speaking of politics and world events. He knows that I sing, but never once asked what I sing, what productions I'm involved in, when the performances would occur or how I feel about any of it. All that matters to him is whether I agree with his perspective, whether he's right. I'm terrified for my mother. Both my parents are fading away. My mother's losing touch with who she is and how she's connected to others. My father is so consumed by the right wing perspective on politics and world events that I feel only a minimal connection with him. I don't see the world the way he does and I don't want to be "convinced" by him.

Losing my last grandparent - made me grateful for the family members I have but also shows the clock never stops and inevitably everyone is getting older and you can’t go back to how things were and can only move forward

This year has held the first breakup of my life. It was painful and quick and totally carried out by me. To make a long story short I lost a dear friend and lover to alcohol, which is somehow worse than losing them to apathy or even to someone else. I still love them a great deal, and I wish I didn't because this would all feel so much better if I could resent them. I'm sad and confused and angry- as well as quite relieved.

I had a Brit Milah this year. The first time I tried was when mom was in Russia (Grandma died at the end of May) and dad got really mad at me because I was needed to keep the family unit running. Mom and dad expressed that they didn't want to know about it, so when everyone left for a Europe trip I got it done. I brought Eddy with me. It wasn't nearly as bad as I expected, the mohel came all the way from NY just for this. A few months prior I went in Taglit, and had a Bar Mitzvah there. My new name is Shelomo Magid. Ever since the Brit I have been laying on Tefillin every day. I am starting to feel more confident in my own Jewishness from a religious standpoint. I feel more connected, more entitled to call myself a Jew, and more equipped to defend Jews from other religious groups, not just secular ones. Lots of thinking, lots of inspiration in my life.

I got married this past year. I am deeply grateful to have found my love and to be building and sharing a beautiful life together. I am also relieved that I am not facing the future alone. I prefer to be in partnership that is supportive and loving. I feel we bring the best out in one another. I am inspired daily by his generosity, kindness, and love.

March 31,2018 was a day I will never forget. It was the Saturday before Easter. Travis and Ryan started the early morning by moving me out of my apartment and into travis's house. We were officially living together. This is been an experience that I wouldn't give up for the world. It has taught me patience and service. It has given me a glimpse of what married life with Travis will be like. I love every moment of living in this house, and making it into OUR home. The day was spent unpacking and we stopped in to visit his mom and dad for about an hour that day as well. Around 9:00 that evening, we finally were showered and sat down after a long hard day of moving and we got the text. "Jim has passed, can you all come." I couldn't believe it. I had not words, all I could do was search T's face for answers to how HE was feeling. There was no emotion on his face. Being there that night when Hogenkamps came to take him to the funeral home, and being with the family just crying - I knew I'd never not be apart of their family. Married or not, I was bonded to them in the moment. The rest of that week was whirlwind. All of our stuff was still in boxes, we spent just enough time at the new house to shower and sleep. We stood in the receiving line, attended the mass, and buried Jim on a cold Thursday in April. My heart broke for the people around me - his family, his kids and grandkids. My heart broke for myself for not having enough time to get to know him better. Then I felt guilty for those feelings because it felt like T was not having them, and after all, it was his father. I am grateful for the time I did get the spend getting to know Jim while he was here, and thankful that he welcomed me into the family with open arms and always teasing me just enough to show he really cared about me. March 31, 2018 was a roller coaster of a day - So much happiness and joy about getting to start a life together with T, and then sadness and heart break over the loss of a loved one. But life goes on, and I believe everything happens for a reason - I don't yet know for sure what that reasoning was behind all the events that happened that day, but i'll never forget them.

My 20th anniversary celebration with Temple Beth Avodah. It made me feel loved and useful and in the right place doing what god meant me to do.

I went to a candidate bootcamp in DC. I never thought I would be accepted, one, and two, it was the MOST INCREDIBLE WEEKEND. I was (and still am!) insanely inspired by the people I met there and their accomplishments.

My molester was diagnosed with cancer. I felt like it was karma. I didn’t feel bad when I heard the news even though this person is related to me. I pity him in many ways but not for this. What he did to me coloured all my relationships afterward especially in regard to how I view control over my body and sex. I even thought how it would be better if he died even though it would cause other people who are close to me pain. I don’t know how to forgive. I equate forgiveness with saying what he did was ok. And it wasn’t ok. None of it was.

The significant experience was finally waking up to the realization that I was financially spiraling downwards & that no one was going to come to my rescue. I transferred to QuickBooks online & woke up to the fact that I needed to increase my pricing, my offerings & be better. I am now stronger & getting resilient!

Less than 1 year ago I was admitted to the bar exam in Italy, which is one of the tougher exam I’ve ever try. I was not sure about succeeding but I did. And I am grateful to my family and my friends, but most of all, to me. Because I made it

I directed a successful play that did better than I ever could have imagined. I got to work with two incredible actors and we got a lot of really wonderful feedback. Getting to stretch my artistic muscles and have total creative control over something was so empowering. I'll never forget the feeling after opening night, when we had a standing ovation and people wouldn't stop hugging me and telling my actors how good they were. I am so proud of that work and I hope it can continue.

My husband graduated from his phd program and got a job about 2 hours away. I'm really happy he got the job, but it's been stressful and being apart while we figure it out is hard.

During the past year I was diagnosed with not 1, but 2 auto-immune diseases, each of which has far-reaching and systemic impacts on multiple organs. I am frustrated that each of the various doctors I see look only at their narrow specialty area, and no one looks at how the symptoms and syndromes are intertwined. But I am determined to learn all I can so I can advocate for myself. What I have is often described as a hidden illness, since many days when you look at me you may not be able to see that something’s wrong. Although that sounds like a blessing, it can also be a curse since it means my family and friends don’t see that I often need their support and patience - and occasionally even assistance with the simplest tasks.

I was fired from my former job as the Youth Director at a Reform synagogue. In the moment it was awful and humiliating, but I think it turned out for the best. In the last month of my job there, I just sat in my office and watched TV all day. There was nothing for me to do and I felt frustrated and limited. It forced me to go back to teaching, because that was the only thing I coh s get on really short notice, and that has led me to my current (awesome) job.

Quit my well paying job, because it was soul crushing and I was very bored. I found a new role that I really enjoy.

I took the MCAT and I didn’t do as well as I would’ve wished but I’m hoping that it’s enough to get me into a good medical school. I’m relieved it’s over-with but nervous it’s not enough to get me to where I want to be. 😬

I made a bad decision to hire someone who turned out to be toxic. The repercussions are still reverberating almost a year after I fired her even though she was only working with me for 5 months. It caused a lot of stress and cost a lot of time and money. In a way it’s a gift because it made me feel so grateful for what I do have that’s true and good and inspired me to change my business to be more protective. But I resent that losers like her and the ‘friend’ who recommended her exist to do nothing more than to leech off of others.

I was formally diagnosed with severe sleep apnea this year, and I am relieved. I was falling asleep at work and was facing suspension or dismissal if something wasn't done. My diagnosis led to my using a BiPap machine at night which has been life changing - no more sleeping and snoring at my desk!

I studied abroad in Europe for two months. It was the most amazing experience of my life and I was able to see so much of the world. I am very grateful for the experience and I think it has made me realize I need to make some changes in my life to be a better person, friend, sister, co-worker, and daughter.

We decided to get divorced. Right now, I feel tired, disappointed, a bit resentful, worried about telling the children. I have a mild sense of dread about having to move house, but I'm also looking forward to the new opportunities, and a lot of the stress disappearing.

I went on a mission trip to Chicago, I reconnected to God. There’s not a day that hasn’t gone by I haven’t thought about Woodlawn and Sunshine. They inspired me back into my faith and to change my view on life

We were together a year. I wanted to love him but I couldn’t. The break up was amicable, he said we would never be the kind of people that would do something to prevent us from being friends but then he started up with a supposed friend of mine 24 hours later. I feel betrayed. I feel alone. I’ve never felt this lonely. I lost my boyfriend and my best friend in 24 hours. I hope it gets better. I hope I can forgive and let go.

I bought a home this year. I handled every aspect of the transaction on my own, with the help and support of wonderful friends. This experience made me feel capable, in control and independent for which I am very grateful. Initially, I did feel some loneliness in making a monumental step like this alone and then living here alone, not really being able to share the joy. But now, I am settled and I am happy and I feel comfortable in my new space.

I got engaged! I feel extremely grateful that I found the love of my life! I'm relieved the waiting is over and we can embark on the next chapter together!

In the past year, the most significant experience I had was taking care of my mother when she was sick, watching her die, and then managing my father as a widower and someone who definitely could not live alone even though he thought he could. I have still so many feelings about all of this. I wish I’d realized how sick my mother was when she started not feeling well (not that it would have made a difference, but I would have been more attentive and patient, I’d like to think). I miss her terribly. I’m also so grateful to have had the experience of caring for her, especially the last weeks with my siblings— especially Mike and Patti. I feel as if it brought us all closer together. I got to see the kind of person Harry is in the best way— he stayed with me after the funeral and helped us figure out how to arrange for dad’s care. He didn’t have a lot of respect for dad, especially as dad shared his womanizing and unfaithful days with Harry, but he supported me. He also supported Linda in that it would have been easy for us to have left after the funeral (we were supposed to have gone to Israel) and leave it all to her. But we didn’t. It was hard to convince Dad to go to Poydras Home, and I still have some guilt about making him leave his house after losing his wife. But he wouldn’t stop driving and insisted that he didn’t need help, and we could see that he had no business driving and did need help, and all of that would have fallen on Linda’s lap had we not stayed. My feelings are still so complicated. I miss my mother. I used to hate my father, but I don’t hate him anymore. He’s learned to value us and express gratitude, and that is something. I see how their relationship became toxic because my mother didn’t assert herself except in anger (and then she was truly horrible); this has gotten me to deal with my issues with harry more directly and with less fear. So I suppose I’ve grown a lot from this experience, but I’d trade it all to have my mother alive.

I am face-to-face with the ending of my $$$. I am feeling an urgent need for success in Shaklee and in sharing GREEN with the wider Jewish community. More good outcomes for others means more income for me. And with do-able success, I will be happier and more relaxed -- might even need fewer supplements for myself!

I came out to my boyfriend as bisexual, and I felt relieved that he was supportive and unbothered by this new fact. But at the same time he didn’t seem all that interested in inquiring more about my sexuality. This made me feel a little confused about how he was feeling and why he didn’t care to know more. In the end it wound up making me feel distant from him and made me feel like he didn’t care, even though I know he is committed and very in love with me. Turns out he just didn’t know how to ask me about it and he didn’t want to pressure me for more information. I wish, as my partner, he wanted to know every little thing I was thinking, because I feel that way about him.

I got Bell's Palsy, a facial paralysis. At first it felt devastating, a friend I knew had had it and it persisted for years, I was afraid. Thanks to him, and some others, I got good advice and took responsibilty for getting the best treatments to help combat it. I met a wonderful acupuncturist, who gave me a lot of support, and by whatever means, I beat it within four weeks. At first I had been very afraid I would be facially afflicted, possibly for a long time. It made me think about my personal vanity. I quite enjoyed some of the 'reclusive' time as I cancelled a holiday and joined Netflix. When it left me, I felt an enormous sense of relief, and very grateful. I'm still slightly afraid it might come back.

I have emerged from a cloud of depression into a vulnerable, spiritually open space. I have opened myself to signs and voices from the Universe and the world around me and have felt truly humbled and awed. It was the hardest year and now the most peaceful season for renewal.

I went to Alaska with my friend, Gloria. It made me realize I can travel again. I am very grateful to Gloria and all the people who helped me on the trip. This year, we have planned a trip to Iceland. Also, I marched in the second Women's March (2018). It was a wonderful experience.

This year Myles has gone from being a baby to being a toddler. He became more interactive, learned to walk and is learning to talk. His personality comes through more every day. Even though there are moments and sometimes hours that are hard, and even though it's meant changing a lot about our lives, watching him grow and learn has been the one of the most incredible, most humbling things that I have ever experienced.

My son graduated from high school and was accepted at his first choice for college. Mixed feelings of being very proud and also thinking more about midlife issues. Very happy that he is on the right path for now.

I think one of the most significant things that happened to me in the past year is that I became the co-interim associate dean. It is something that I have been building toward for a long time. This change has brought a number of surprising emotions. The first month was difficult. I was totally uncomfortable. I literally had no idea what I was doing!! On the one hand, I enjoy being in the center of where all the action is happening in the College. I also like making decisions. It is a space where I feel pretty comfortable. It has been hard to separate what is important, though, from what is not. Some of the stuff we are responsible for is utterly stupid. I also have seen sides to people that I really don't like and I find myself wishing to change their behavior or their attitudes, which is utterly foolhardy. It is also just demanding...the amount of conversation that I have to have, the time spent on email. I wonder if this path really makes me happy or is it the rhythm that I enjoy.

This year I started taking Celexa to help with my depression. It felt like a big decision but by the time I arrived at it, it seemed like an easy one to make. Its been amazing what a difference it has made, I feel like I have climbed from the depths of darkness to the such a more livable place and I am really grateful for it. I'm a better friend, husband, and colleague because of it.

This past year, I became the first college grad in my family. But that wasn't the most significant experience– the greatest one was moving across the country! I feel so grateful that I had the self-love and courage to get up, change my environment, and be in a new city where I can be more free, and be authentically myself. I feel inspired to continue to grow, take risks, learn, fail, and continue to live.

The reward for a mitzvah is another mitzvah. I had an opportunity to return a lost item to a neighbour a few months ago, and then more recently, I had another opportunity. It was affirming of G-d's providence and my own worth. I am grateful beyond words. Yes. No, well, maybe ever so slightly resentful that I cannot do more. The difference between this mitzvah and most others is that I felt it in a revealed way. The experience inspires me to be just as excited and grateful over every mitzvah.

Getting a Peloton bike and being able to exercise at home on my own time. It gave me more convenience and freedom to exercise without feeling like I was imposing on my husband to watch the kids while I was out at the gym or a class. I am very grateful for this technology, that someone thought to gift it to me, and I am inspired to increase the number of days/week that I use it (currently 2-3).

In February I received what is usually a deadly diagnosis: pancreatic cancer. In March I underwent a six-hour operation to cut out the cancer. Now I’m on the last ten weeks of follow-up chemotherapy. Now I’m ready to start feeling healthy and strong again. I’m deeply grateful for my doctors’, my family’s and my spouse’s efforts to see me through this dark and scary valley.

I went to Hong Kong with my family. It was something I feared deeply. I thought the 14hr flight with 2 little kids would be terrible and our stay there would be hard. It was exactly the opposite. I realized that I am in control of my life in a new way. Together we can tackle anything. I am inspired. And now I’m planning our next big overseas trip. In 2019 we want to go to Europe.

I retired from my 35 year career. I feel liberated in some ways and lost on others. It will take time to find a new Rhythm

I wanted to stop being alive. I was trying to figure out how to make it all stop. I decided to make a list of things to do. I would do them and if I still wanted to die after all that, then I would do it. I am grateful I kept going. I don't want to die today.

This past year I had my first real relationship, which was wild. I think I learned a lot from it, and got so much. Even though it ended in a bit of a sad way, ultimately I think we both grew from it, and I'm excited to see our friendship continue to grow over the coming year. I probably made some decisions in our relationship and towards our relationship that maybe I shouldn't have, and at times it was scary, and frustrating, and at times I did regret choices I made, but now I feel like I'm in a place where I can look back and be thankful for the experiences I had and continue to form even better choices and relationships in the future.

I got engaged to the love of my life!!! Nuf said ;)

Right after New Year, Jan's house burned in the Tubbs fire. Everything gone. Tragedy brings family together. I did what I could to help. Jan stayed with Dad. They had their issues adjusting. Now, Jan is in a new home. She says she's happy. She has extra money and stomach issues. She's helping her kids and feeling good about it. I'm going to write a book. I'm free. Reading a lot. Just trying to enjoy life while fires still burn in California. Arson? Trump as leader not working!

My business has been failing. It has challenged me in every part of my life. And has me questioning my purpose and future and self worth. I am sad. Angry. Frustrated. And terrified.

I got married on July 7, 2018! This wonderous occasion necessitated my quitting work and moving to Jupiter, FL from Colo. Spgs., Colorado. There has been a lot of learning and adapting going on. Living with someone again for the first time in 7 years, intermingling lifestyles, lives, and finances. It has been a loving road with the occasional road rash as we learn to live and love together. Life is great!

I got married! It changed my life immensely. I now have an amazing wife that I love and can’t imagine doing life without

Tony died on Wednesday Sept. 4. Months of watching brain cancer steal his thoughts, his movement, his cognition, his ability to talk, to eat, to drink, to live....over. Just like that. Tony's breath stopped and his life ceased to be, except in our hearts and our minds. As my sister and the kids (and I) work through their pain and anger (Andie) and sadness (all of us), I can only wonder what this new year will hold. I know there will be good moments, happy moments, peaceful moments. I know there will also be harsh moments of reality, of sadness, of disbelief, of emptiness and of darkness. We now don't know what life will look like tomorrow, or the next day, or the next. Scary. Hard to imagine life without Tony. But here we go. L'shana tovah, indeed.

I moved in with my sister.. It's been difficult. But it has been worth it. I don't always like having a roommate, and our room is never clean. But not having rent, and always having a friend - that's been really nice.

I have had two major experiences in the past year that have had a major impact. The first is that I am 506 days clean of my addiction. Through my recovery I have built a very strong support system of four men that share my addiction. Although we only communicate online or phone, I have been able to share every secret I harbored for years. Sharing with others has lifted the guilt and shame I experienced for years. Sharing with them has made me more honest and humble. I connect more with people on my day to day encounters. The second experience has been returning to the Catholic Church. Something has been missing in my life for years. I searched and tried a variety of thing; meditation, running, productivity hacks. Nothing seemed to make a difference in my mind and heart. One Sunday morning I woke up and went to Mass. That morning I realized what was missing was God.

Started GCSEs fully

After almost 18 months post break-up, I agreed to have coffee with the ex-boyfriend and long-time friend who dumped me right before Christmas 2016. We hadn't talked in over a year. He wanted to meet this spring because, he said, "You were my best friend so for long, it seems wrong to never talk again." I agreed that refusing to speak to him would be immature. So I met him for coffee. And it was the best thing I could have done for myself. After months of trying to force myself to forgive him for what he did and all the pain he caused, I learned that I needed to perform an ACT of forgiveness. In this case, it was sitting down with him for four hours, and catching up on each other's life. I wasn't angry. I wasn't bitter. I wasn't looking to punish him. Instead, I was kind, open-minded and gracious. When I walked away, I felt 100 pounds lighter--and I continued to feel that way for months. In fact, even now--five months later--I feel better than I did before that day in the coffee shop. I released all the resentment and anger and pain that had lingered, and I feel so much better for it. We've been able to stay friendly since, and I feel like I got my friend back, even though I'd never want that boyfriend back. It was a very powerful lesson in forgiveness, and how sometimes actions are stronger than words.

The most significant experience from the past year was getting married. It was a mixture of emotions and firsts. It was my first proposal, my first experience parenting a child of my own, my first time being called a wife. It brought sadness along with the joy. The acceptance of my family was limited. Fara and Nick were very happy and accepting of Christine and our relationship. Lynsey was happy for me but could not abide by my relationship with Christine. It caused a rift in our already limited relationship. I thought things were okay with my dad, but he didn’t want to come, and although he sent a check, he sent it wrapped in a sheet of paper from a junk drawer with a picture of a gymnast with impersonal words like best wishes. It really hurt, cutting deeply into a part of me that just wants to be loved by him. My wife is wonderful, she is funny, sexy, smart and loving. She sees me more clearly than anyone has and loves me deeply. I am eternally grateful for her. Overall, getting married and going through these firsts has been good. It has been a deep blessing, full of love, challenges, fun and adventure.

She broke up with me. Suddenly. Devastatingly. I thought we were building a life together. It turned out, we weren't. This has been the defining experience of my year, and it's been one that has deeply pained and challenged me.

I auditioned for a dance company in my city after years of putting it off. I ended up getting cast in a dance and I was so happy to be dancing again since I hadn’t in years. I forgot how much I missed it. I was so relieved to have this outlet in my life again.

Traveling to Iceland with my family. I'm so blessed to have had the means and opportunity to go with my daughter. We explored and learned and relished our time together. I also was able to see Jon being a productive and helpful father. I'm so deeply grateful.

I was bullied at work by my manager starting in January 2018. I am now on short term disability which I thought I never would do and think of as weak. But I had no choice since I was so stressed and anxious all the time. I still am. I don’t know what will happen. Will I go back to my old job or will I find a new one? I am trying hard to find a new one. I hope it all works out. I need a change and cannot stand her. Or stand being bullied.

I think the most significant experience of the year was supporting Melissa while she underwent treatment for breast cancer. I am so thankful that I had the opportunity to help her and her girls. I was able to show my love for them by supporting Melissa through all of her treatments, chemo, radiation, mastectomy. I took time away from my family and work to spend two evenings a week with her and the girls, feeding them, bathing them, playing with them. At times it was exhausting, but always well worth it. I am relieved that everything went as well as it did. I have learned to treasure our friendships and our health. And to be more open with giving my love and expressing it to my friends and family.

I went on a 6 day silent meditation retreat meditation retreat. I have not been on a retreat before, but have kept a consistent meditation practice for 6 months at the time of the retreat. I had many questions in life: why did my friendships fail, why did I feel like I was straining in some areas of life and not others, and why was I so unsatisfied? The reward of having a still mind is not only an overwhelming sense of peace, but also the answers you seek reveal themselves to you gently. I learned that I was not kind nor compassionate to myself, and that meant I was not that towards others. I learned to be forgiving of myself.

This year the most significant experience has been interviewing for a new job. I had decided last year that I would be leaving my current position and that I should jump into the mix even if I didn't feel ready or qualified. I continued applying in the Fall 2017 and the Spring 2018 and I have been going on different interviews for the past 6 months. It was exciting and gratifying that my expertise was on demand and that I found places where I would fit. As an academic, my job search process can stretch over many months so there have been positions I have been discussing for months now, that may not become reality until early next year, but things are moving. These opportunities have made me feel successful and I have created multiple new relationships that will be useful in the future no matter what. The light at the end of the tunnel has allowed me to survive at my current job. And having to develop a 5-10 year plan for my research to present to a new employer has been a lot of fun. I had been focused on getting funding for so long and on squeezing my ideas into the template the federal government wanted for me, that opening up to big questions and dreaming about new possibilities has been really rewarding and inspiring. Seeing all personal development the work I did last year helping me get to the next step has also been exciting.

My grandson was born. It was a landmark change in the relationship with my daughter, and she with herself as well. I am deeply grateful for the life and value this little one ushered in.

I met a truly special person (Kyle). The experience really tested my resolve to stay true to my feelings and desires, but I’m ultimately grateful to have met someone worth the struggle.

I climbed the Great Wall of China in partial fulfillment of my personal Bucket List. It gave me a wonderful sense of accomplishment. I am very grateful that I had the opportunity to achieve this goal and inspired to continue working on the list in the coming year.

I continued as an assistant coach at a summer swim program and was able to improve and learn from last year. It is funny how only when you put yourself out there and push yourself into weird but very interesting situations that you learn more about yourself. I learned that I am a really good supporting coach and can fill in when others need their ideas supported.

I learned a decent amount of Spanish and went to the Dominican Republic for a week. It had a change on my perspective on language and culture. Learning a language is a lot more difficult than I imagined. And Dominican culture, as I observed it, is a lot different from the other several Caribbean cultures that I had been exposed to. I'm grateful for having those memories and experiences, its helping me grow. I'm relieved. I'm resentful that some of the experiences that I had has opened my mind in ways that can't be closed and in some small ways, ignorance is bliss. I'm inspired, that with so little, we can do so much and experience so much.

I had surgery to replace my knee. My overall levels of pain has decreased. But 9 months later I’m still struggling to work, to function outside work. It certainly been harder than I was prepared for.

Hans was diagnosed with schizophrenia (schizo-affective disorder). I don't doubt the accuracy of the diagnosis. I am terrified, and sad, and grieving the loss of the life I had hoped they would have. I worry about them constantly. On the other hand, there is some relief at getting an actual diagnosis. It explains a lot. They have always been odd, and anxious. Now they are starting to have some cognitive symptoms (difficulty with complex, multi-step tasks, difficulty concentrating), and it's just heartbreaking. I love them so, so much.

We took a trip to South Africa and spent four days on safari, being with the animals in their environment, seeing the breath of nature, hearing the birds and marveling at the sunsets. It was impossible to not believe in a god.

Not getting cast in Blue Stockings. At first I was extremely upset and angry, but it taught me a lot and I am better because of it! Stage crew was a new experience and sound was very exciting to learn as well. I made tons of new friends and it probably helped me get the role of Vice-President

After 2 horrific years of bad health from a botched surgery, I began improving. My doctor was finally able to close the hole in my stomach that would not heal, and the drug Gattex made my minimal remaining intestine absorb many times it's normal amount. I was able to reduce TPN calories and to disconnect from daytime infusions. My body chemistry stabilized, allowing for travel. I was able to eat everything again. I became more independent and able to resume many activities previously thought to be impossible again. Yes, I am most grateful for the care and miracle of medicine that I have come this far.

I received negative feedback at work on my empathy as a manager. It was incredibly painful, but I think I’m growing through learning. I’ve always heard that my standards are too high for other people, but this is the first time it’s come across as a lack of empathy. By this time next year I hope to have balanced this aspect of my leadership.

I got a dream job that I didn't know was my dream job until it found me. I'm so excited to wander down this path.

Multiple betrayals that tested love, yet fortified those loves that remain.

I was on the tech crew for Anything Goes, and I'm so happy I was. Not only was the experience itself outstanding and I had a great time, but it let me figure out where I stood with myself. I was able to realize that tech is really what I want to be doing as a job for my life, and knowing a path feels really good. I was also able to make some amazing friends, so for the second half of junior year I had a wonderful support system and social group.

I have managed to reverse my type 2 diabetes. I have completely changed how I love and I've lost nearly 6 stone. I have fitness and energy levels I never imagined I'd have. I feel very grateful but also very anxious. I have to rigorously manage what I eat because I know I can't afford to let my guard down. Knowing this is it for the rest of my life scares me.

I found pictures of me from when I was 20. (I am now almost 65). I looked so amazing in those pictures. What I remembered is how badly I felt about myself at that time...fat, ugly, not good enough. Now, 50 lbs heavier, I feel better about who I am and how I look. I realized how much I tortured myself back then and what a waste of energy that was. This made me so sad. So much time wasted. I am relieved that I no longer feel so awful about myself...just sad for what was.

My father died about 1 1/2 years ago and my mother several years before that. I and several siblings that live in other cities had been staying at the condo when in town until we sold the condo several months ago. It was a relief to finish dealing with items in the condo. But it also was sad because it made my parents loss final.

Sold condo in Green Valley retirement community and bought fixer upper on 5 acres in rural Hereford area south of Sierra Vista, AZ for $52k. After 22 years of retirement community living, I finally realized that that the retirement community environment does not support me spiritually. I love the tranquility and social atmosphere here in our new home. I’ve spent the past five months restoring small 785 sf. house. (Retired remodeling/home repair contractor). Almost finished. Have 12x12 workshop (share with husband) and 12x12 guesthouse/art studio space. Am looking forward to exercising my creativity there. I am both grateful for an understanding husband/life partner and inspired by all I’ve accomplished and will accomplish in the future. I celebrated my 72nd birthday recently. My husband is 80 and still physically active...rides his motorcycle daily and mows our extensive grassed area on riding lawn mower.

Happily, this has been a stable and uneventful twelve months. No one close to us has died and all of us are pretty healthy. Next tier--no one lost a job or a limb or suffered an accident or won the lottery. My mom had a breakdown, but that would not be significant because it happens every three years or so. She stopped taking her medication. Donna and I went up and stayed with her and got her to take her meds and go to the doctor. I am grateful to have my mother alive and in good shape. I think she would benefit from living with either my brother or me, but she's not ready for that big of a change and may never be. I'm grateful to Donna for helping me and for being patient with my mom. She can be a handful! I don't feel any resentment towards my mother. She grows tired of the medicine for whatever reason. Also she likes having us in her life I suppose.

I left my career of teaching after 12 years this July to start my own coaching business for teachers. I tried to do this while teaching but I just couldn’t fit it all in. I have felt numerous emotions. I have felt equal measures of relief, excitement, doubt and stupidity. Time will tell.

My daughter was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum, or as I prefer to call it, being autistic. She has started school, and is doing phenomenally well. I am so proud of her.

I had a 6 month relationship with a man I loved. He was someone I wanted in my life, to spend my life with. It ended when he told me he wasn't in love with me and didn't want to waste any more of our time. It hurt and it still hurts. I'm going through a whole slew of emotions. I'm hurt and depressed. I'm angry that he let me introduce him to my parents. It feels devestating at times because I'm 40 and highly unlikely to find anyone to share my life with. And ultimately, it just makes me question if the universe has forgotten about me. I feel there is really no place I fit. I want so much to have someoene that cares about me, as much as I care about him, who finds me important to him. I don't think that's too much to ask from life if you are willing to offer it in return, but I don't know if I will ever find that.

I received a job offer at a significantly higher salary than I had. I wasn’t sure it was the correct job offer because I wanted to apply the skills I leaned working in financial regulation to something else. I also wasn’t sure that moving to Philadelphia was correct. I’m not sure the move or the job are going well. I may look to move back to dc after the first of the year because i liked the community I worked so hard to build for myself. I also learned how hard it is to find an allergist that is as good as dr ein. I’ve learned how important it is to take care of yourself

Last year's hope that a huge burden would be lifted has been realized!! I retired after working for 51 years for someone else. I got my first official pay stub at age 14 working in a restaurant for 95 cents an hour. I had hoped to work into my 70s, but found myself increasingly resenting the heartless negotiations I had to engage to get time off to be with ailing relatives, the control an institution had over my time, and the driving, driving, driving and charting, charting, charting required for my job. So I now look forward with anticipation to having spacious attention for what I consider my life work--embracing it at my own pace, in my own time, and in my own way. And already this first month of retirement has gifted invaluable freedom of time to support my ailing and aging elders. Likewise, gratitude for my 401K proceeds, social security, and Medicare--may it be that my daughter and her generation will also be able to rely on such resources when it is her time to stop working for others.

A significant experience that has happened to me this past year was giving relationships another try. After being single for two years, and not really caring about having someone to share myself with or even my life with, I met someone. At first, I was relieved and very grateful but my mind started playing tricks on me. I kept thinking of all the reasons why I was single for the past two years and why I never went out of my way to meet someone. I couldn’t get the negative thoughts out of my head. I kept ending the relationship and had a same sense of feeling relieved but not for the right reasons. It took me a while to learn that although I have issues, you sometimes can work past them while being with someone. Granted, it’s a little difficult but I feel it’ll be worth it in the end. I’ve learned that having someone to be with isn’t terrible, like I had thought it would be. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be, but I think within time my memories that still haunt me will eventually fade into nothingness and I’ll feel whole once again. He’s a great guy, and I haven’t always been able to see that. I still have my issues of trusting someone and giving myself completely away, but I’m definitely trying. I’m curious as to where the future will take us but I’m hopeful.

I graduated nursing school this past year! I am proud of myself and a little bit astounded. I never imagined that I would or could be a nurse, or any kind of health care professional or a person in a science-based job. I'm grateful for the opportunity, so grateful to my amazing classmates. Relieved that it is over. Scared shitless to start my first nursing job. I feel like I don't even know how to prime a line.

I discovered that i could love someone again in such a pure way. My heart was closed for 20 years and i felt i could fly with so much happiness. I am grateful i experienced it again. I am inspired to love again because this didn´t work out and i feel it will be possible in the near future. Resentful only because he was not definetely the person who deserved to be loved by me.

I graduated from college this year. I am still amazed at how much time and energy went into pursuing that singular goal and I now feel slightly lost—I’ve been trying to get to this point for so long and now I’m just done. At the same time, I’m relieved and excited and I know that this was a major accomplishment that makes me so proud of myself.

Kai's life ended at the end of July. I have never felt a loss this great. She was a daily part of my life for over 12 years and I miss her so much. I still "see" her everywhere around the house and it makes my heart ache. I keep telling myself she had a wonderful, full life, but all I can feel right now is sadness.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 55. Within three months I had surgery and radiation and began a five year course of aromatase inhibiting drug therapy to prevent recurrence. It was an intense, rich, terrifying, unsettling, life-affirming experience. I found out that I am loved and supported by many. I am struggling to figure out my new relationship with this body.

Over the past year, my husband and I have become "almost" empty-nesters. Our two older children are in college and grad school, and our youngest, age 16, is with us only part-time due to a shared custody agreement. I suppose more than anything, this new state of being has surprised me; I am someone who thinks and plans ahead, anticipates what is to come, and yet this seemingly-sudden change in our world has somewhat blind-sided me. Because we are relative newlyweds (8 years), we've come to this point much sooner than most couples. My ongoing emotions about this new state are complex: gratitude, that my husband and I don't seem to be facing the "what now?" dilemma of longer-term couples, but instead are relishing the compatibility and ease with one another that brought us together; nostalgia for the too-short time our boisterous, blended family had all under one roof; and regret, for not fully anticipating the current state and thereby investing even more time and energy when we were all together. Still, I also feel pride - we navigated those fragile teen years (plus a new marriage) with a lot of love, laughs and integrity. And hope - while we don't have us all together nearly as much as I wish, I am hopeful that the foundation we laid with each of our kids, individually, has set them on a good path, one that will draw them back to us because we are a place of stability and belonging. And most of all, love and gratitude for my husband, who proves to me every day what a perfect traveling companion he is for this journey.

A few times this year, I was tested to assert my needs in relationship to an authority figure. My impulse has been to not make waves or find a work-around, even if it means sacrificing my well-being. I've learned that this restricts authentic connection and creativity, and breeds a resentment and sense of victimization. It has brought me a lot of relief to have difficult and honest conversations with people who intimidate me. I've been trying to identify how to feel free in contexts where I'm feeling controlled or restricted, and sometimes it means gracefully stepping out.

A significant event from the last year was getting my teaching license and starting to work as a teacher. I am so grateful for this career change. It has opened up an entirely new world for me. I love the chance that I am getting to work with children in Israel. It’s amazing how as things change so much stays the same. I am so grateful to be a teacher right now even if it’s not my forever job.

This has been a year filled with significant experiences, but the experience that stands out is meeting my long-lost sister. We met in person for the very first time less than a year ago, and we have continued to develop our relationship since then. I was overwhelmed with complex emotions—deep joy and gratitude for meeting her, painful sadness from the circumstances of our separation, hopeful and anxious about the ways we’ll continue to grow together and apart. I am still learning from the experience, and I am filled with renewed joy frequently—when we talk on the phone, send parcels, share photographs. We are firmly in each other’s lives now, and I never thought I would get to experience such a wonder.

We moved to Boston! We have been talking about it for so long, and the unfulfilled desire was hanging over my head making me feel restless. But we did it! First put an offer on the house, then started the job search, then took 2 months off to travel, and finally we're here-- able to start in on the new phase. It feels great. I hope this is the right move for us; I feel that it is.

The move of theUS embassy to Jerusalem for which I am grateful

Vacationed with Holly, Ben, Naomi and Martha in Ocean City. Mostly a wonderful time together. Naomi was mostly happy. Naomi made chicken for a dinner and did the dishes one evening. Fostered one on one time with Naomi and Martha - especially on the beach. Had much fun with Martha on the beach - jumping waves, playing with the sand. Good family time, with small exceptions - Ben hurting Holly on last evening. Naomi upset on last day, but got over it.

I moved into a new apartment and furnished it with all new items! This was turning point for me in moving on in my life. I am both grateful for a home I’m proud of and relieved that the move is finished!

The October firestorm is what comes to mind first; the panic of evacuating in the middle of the night, the anxiety of checking in with basically everyone I knew in the city to make sure they were somewhere safe, the long days of uncertainty about what was burning already and where the fire was heading. The experience left me a bit hypervigilant, but also pleased to discover that Santa Rosa has a lot of people willing to do what it takes to make sure their neighbors are taken care of (at least in a crisis). The other, more personal experience: a person who had been a millstone around my neck for a while finally dropped out of my life, and it has been such a relief!

I let myself think I was in love with a boy. A boy that would never be capable of loving me back because of his selfishness and conceited behavior. I would never live up to what he thought I should be. One day I decided enough was enough and I stopped talking to him and giving him my mind and attention. Now I feel healthier and better than I have felt. Letting go of this toxic person was the best thing I could have ever done.

I had surgery on my foot in the last year. I knew it was going to be difficult, but not how much it would affect me emotionally, or how long it would take to start feeling normal. It was a long, dark winter. I struggled with depression. I have more empathy now my father's struggle with chronic pain and mobility. I will never be the person I was before physically. But I hope I learned about myself and my capacity to deal with difficult situations. But, I also wish I had reached out more for help. I'm not sure how much it would have changed anything, but I realized that I need to be more gentle with myself. I deserve self-care.

Finding out I'm in menopause at 33. It's only been a couple of days and it's probably the most formative thing that's happened this year. Mostly I'm numb right now. Resentful of all the women I see at work who have abused or neglected their children. All the women who use substances while pregnant. I'm conflicted at what our next steps will be. I haven't even told my husband yet. He didn't want any more kids so he'll probably be grateful that it takes it off the table. But his kid isn't my kid. I resent having to take care of his kid when I don't get the chance myself.

Over a year now, but I’m back practising in clinic. I’m back to being me, and all the crap and bollocks that happened in the interregnum is well away in another world wher it belongs. A slightly crap world with slightly crap people inhabiting it!

Moving across the country. There have been a number of ripple effects to most aspects of my life, including my partnership, career, community, and my sense of self and belonging. Overall it has been a positive experience but continues to be a juggle of all the different impacts. Prioritizing what to focus on continues to be tricky and 9 months into the transition I am just now starting to look at how I want my life to look going forward.

This year, I began working on my PhD for real. I was enrolled in a PhD program since 2016, but I feel as though I did not take it seriously. My supervisor was largely absent and I don't think he was a fan of my work. We had a lot of ideological and fundamental differences. I was enrolled in a field which wasn't my passion simply because I believed it to be more impressive than what I really wanted to study. In 2018, I dropped out of my PhD program. At first, I felt like a loser. However I soon enrolled in a new program. Now I'm working on a PhD in creative writing. My supervisor is responsive and he is as excited about my work as I am. He doesn't make me feel stupid. He provides constructive criticism and, although he isn't afraid to tell me when something needs work, he is also generous with his praise. A PhD in Creative writing may not seem as impressive as a PhD in Analytical Philosophy, but for me it is the right thing. At first I felt depressed over my decision to quit my previous program. I felt as though I was stupid. I felt like a failure. Now I feel both relieved and hopeful. Sometimes, you just know something is right even if it is an unorthodox choice.

Moving out - this time, under the right circumstances, in the right headspace - made me realize how capable I truly am. Ever since leaving for college, I’ve had a bit of a downward spiral, and have always needed my mom to help pull me out of it. Being on my own finally made me realize how capable I truly am. I have coping mechanisms and I have to ability to be independent. Being out of my parents’ house has given me the courage to begin thinking about my future in real terms, and not just as a hypothetical. I have the capacity to someday be successful

After nearly 8 years together, my marriage ended. I knew it was coming but I was unprepared. I am financially unstable and still dealing with the emotional issues that made the marriage difficult. On the plus side, I am happy in a new relationship. My boyfriend is amazing. We struggle with the same mental health issues and because of that we're able to support each other on the bad days. He makes me happier than I've been in a very, very long time.

Four months of non-stop business travel with my husband (and business partner) has made me grateful for the bond that continues to build between us after 39 years of marriage. I am also grateful that we built a business together which, financially, hasn't been easy, but has given us flexibility and a lifestyle that we both enjoy most of the time.

I moved out to live by myself, which has been interesting. I am relieved that I'm not living there anymore. I do not like having to hear the having sex though 😑

I met (my queen) Janelle Monae--twice! The first time was at an Everyday People event and the second time was at her Dirty Computer Tour D.C. show. The first time was really cool because I was in a setting full of beautiful, diverse, queer, fun people. And I think that inspired me to officially come out to my parents (and social media) as pansexual/queer in general. The second time, I met up with this guy, Travis, who I'd met at (and hadn't seen since) Janelle's Electric Lady Tour in 2013. He got me all the way to the front and center so I had the most amazing close up view of her heartstopping breathtaking dynamic af show. It was more than 2 HOURS of just uninhibited amazingness. And then when the show was over I was able to sorta sneak into the meet and greet and got a picture with the queen. Again. I'm so grateful! I feel so lucky to have been in the presence of such a warm, beautiful, inspiring, and creative person who has really affected me, my music taste, and my drive to be my best self.

I went to Mumbai. I fell in love with the city and Indian culture. I tried new things and new food. I strengthened my connection to tikkun olam. I am excited to go to Mumbai again in December

I had a huge breakthrough in therapy earlier this year; I have learned that freedom comes from within, which sounds like a hopelessly cheesy and/or woo-woo platitude. But it's true: by waiting for outside approval, I constantly pushed my own wants and even needs aside to the point of not even living my own life. The sad fact is that I could never be PERFECT enough to earn the freedom to be myself, both because perfection is impossible (and will not earn me love) and freedom cannot be earned. It is given or we own it, either way, for who we are not what we have done. Children should be given their freedom; adults must own their own freedom. And it is long past the days when my mother demanded that her child earn freedom. I am an adult, and I cannot be rich or pretty or successful enough to EARN that freedom, because I have to be free first before I can truly exist. Finding my freedom is an arduous process but it is worth it.

Well I made it to final callbacks for a new musical about princess Diana doing an out of town try out in Cali before it heads to broadway. I was up for Diana’s understudy. It was a pretty exhilarating process. I really connected with a woman on the creative team and I felt like I might have found a spot in the theater world for myself. When I didn’t get it I was crushed. I was resentful of myself for wanting it so badly. Now that a month or so has passed I’m pretty grateful and trying to find inspiration from it. Trying to find the fuel in how far I got in the process. That in and of itself must mean I am doing something right.

In the last year, Grandpa dies and Grandma just before that. It is still weird to think that they are officially gone; I just almost told Mom today to give something to Grandpa he would want to see. Their house is empty and for sale. It is a transition that has been inevitable for a long time and is somewhat relieving that it’s almost done. The heartache of the constant stress of Mom always racing to the hospital is gone, minus issues with Pa. Celebrating my last living grandparent’s 87th birthday yesterday and today is even sweeter now. Maybe there is something to all those supplements he takes!

I am so grateful and inspired to be sober. I feel like I can wake up, and show up to life, and start on the path of living my purpose.

Mel's Meniere's attacks have started again. He's been ill for over 3 months and we've had to cancel the first holiday we've booked in five years. He is worried about driving and his negative-talk is significant. He's obviously depressed and struggling. There is absolutely nothing I can do to help and neither can anyone else. My reaction has been to withdraw as he is so unpleasant when he's ill that it's easier not to engage. I can't say that it's wearing me down as he's the one that is ill and it's vile for him. It's no different to millions of other people who have a sick partner so I'm quite aware that this is normal but it feels like the worst possible timing after the problems with the house move, work being hugely stressful and the opportunity to write again suddenly being pushed to the side because I'm worried that I have to earn enough money to look after myself.

I made the decision I am going to retire at 60. Work was so hellish, even 'tho it means, financially, I have to sell my home, I felt, for my health, I had to do it. That was a few months ago and althouggh the decision was made out of a negative, I'm now completely on board with this choice!

Early in the year, my former husband and current roommate was taken I’ll. I remember that I took him to the emergency room on New Years Day, thinking he was suffering the aftermath of a stroke. In fact, he had an advanced and inoperable brain tumor. He died before then of February. We had ended our marriage in deep bitterness. I am so grateful that we had his last three years on earth to spend together seeking rapprochement and cementing our love as an enduring friendship. I am grieving still, and miss him every day.

I did Whole 30 and sprained my ankle at the same time. I was a bit resentful that I hurt myself because being tired from not feeling full from eating. I learned some healthy eating habits that have stuck and learned new ways of cook meats and veggies. Overall in my reintro though I don’t feel I learned as much a as I should have. I would consider doing a longer round in the future to learn more but afraid to hurt myself again, plus doing the program requires a lot of work, time, prep, and money.

I started doing this in 2014, and I feel like I had a child announcement every year. So it is interesting I don't have any kid related events. I guess the biggest event was changing jobs for the second time in the 4 years I have been doing this. I was at my last job for less than two years, so it felt odd leaving so quickly. I've been at my job for about 9 months, and I really like it. The environment is great, the salary is good, and I feel like I have a lot of room to grow if I am assertive. I was stressed at first, but I am relieved that it has worked out so well. I think this is best experience I have in a long time. Not only am I growing, but there is very little stress. I really feel like I'm in a career path that I really enjoy!

In the past year, I’ve learned how to be happy by myself. I love being around people and spending time with them, but learning how to be okay just being alone and sitting with yourself can be really scary. I’m so grateful that I learned this valuable skill as I enjoy the time I get to myself in college more and more.

My inlaws moved down the street one year ago. While it was not their choice but a necessity for them to be close to my husband so that he could help them when needed its allowed my family including our kids to have a better relationship. Before they moved we would see them twice a year at most. It's more frequent now and while their health is failing it makes me sad that we didnt see them more.

I quit my job, we left our apartment and took off for our world trip! I am grateful that we both kept committed to this project in the past 2 years, especially when it came to changing our lifestyles to be able to save money and I am relieved to have quit my job and to be done with all the administrative trouble and moving out! And so far: yes we are super happy about it!!!

This past year I experienced my very first exhibition. It was small and for one night only and I was so overwhelmed at the reception of my images. Everyone loved them and they were so well received. It was a stress and a small financial struggle to get it together but worth all the time and money. The very next day I had to take my photos down and was somewhat sad. I had worked so hard and the joy was so brief. I plunged into what I call the sunken place. I found it so hard to get motivated or to stay motivated. It was a struggle to do basic things and I had very little excitement for anything. Money was (and still is) such a worry that I worried a little too much on what was next and didn't appreciate all the joy and attention that was gained from he exhibition. I'm so grateful for the opportunity and the lessons learned and this has helped me to be more present and to enjoy things as they are happening and not to worry about what is next too much.

I started going to psychotherapy in acknowledgment that some of my coping mechanisms have become counterproductive (e.g compulsively running late at night). It’s helped me address some of my frustrations and speak about things from both past and present that make me feel bad, but it is also another source of stress in that it is one more thing I have to fit in my schedule.

I moved to the country from the city where I had been involved in local politics to the point that I was filled with rage when I walked around meeting people I hated in the food co-op and was unable to do any creative work. The move has been challenging (renovating an old farm house), but altogether wonderful, renewing, liberating, re-humanizing.

I got engaged! The whole week after he proposed, I was in a dream-like state, staring at my ring (which was his grandmother’s), thinking about the gossamer threads that now bound our families together forever. At the end of that week, I received a promotion at work and was moved to a new department. Unfortunately, that transition didn’t work out as well as the engagement. It was too much too fast, and now I’m basically on probation as an admin assistant. I feel anger, shame, and disappointment, but I have to hope that within the next few months I’ll be assigned to duties that match my experience and talent.

I ran the NYC marathon (after being injured and then recovered) and got pneumonia (last 5 miles of that race was hell but I made it through!) I am grateful that I recovered. Relieved that I finished (and I didn't stop), Resentful that I didn't prepare enough for the practice run that got my injured and I think contributed to my pneumonia on marathon day, and inspired that I can DO ANYTHING AS LONG AS I DON'T GIVE UP in the face of adversity!!

I visited my sister-in-law in the hospital. She wanted to go back to her room but they would not let her until her heart stablilized. I prayed with her in her way and listened deeply. Later that day her heart stabilized and she was allowed to go back to her room. During that time we spent together, I could tell that she had had enough of “fighting” each new health challenge that came along and I think she finally felt she could stop if she wanted to. That was the last time I saw her. She died a few weeks later - in her own room. I feel it to be a privilege to be called to help people find peace when they are close to death.

My father-in-law died August 27th. I was relieved for him that he is no longer ill or tired or in pain. I felt grateful that I got to see him twice during his last month of life in the hospital. I miss him and feel a huge whole in our lives. It will not be the same without him around. I am pleased at how my mother-in-law, husband, and sister-in-law are doing so well with their grief.

The Lord came and delivered my soul--my heart and my mind--from bondage to the evil one after I refused to listen to His repeated warnings against outbursts of control and anger toward my daughter. A year of torture and destruction in every area of my life included something like a sword or an arrow piercing my heart and a thicket of thorns setting itself up in my mind. I was impotent to think or feel any good thing. Jesus came to me on February 13 of this year and liberated my heart and mind and took me captive to His love, mercy, forgiveness and goodness. It was on this same day, February 13, 2009, eight years earlier, that my husband left me: a day that I ran to Him with nothing but a burned down life because of the anger and control that characterized my life up until then. His unrelenting love toward me is making me whole again. The consuming fire of His presence around me is demolishing lingering arguments the darkness my heart and mind had come to believe. My daughter and I are coming into new life and fellowship. He is the one I now let fight my every battle. He is the one to whom I owe everything and it is my great joy to live my life for Him.

There have been so many. Wow it's been a year. Got divorced.... again! There is a sense of relief in moving forward.. and hopeful that a sense of excitement for life can re-emerge.

Moved house. Felt happy to have finally got in and sold the old one. I felt relieved...

I got a dog. Not just any dog, the most amazing dog. And she’s my emotional support animal so no one can say I cannot have her. She’s made my life so much better. My anxiety and depression have improved so much. I don’t know what I would do without her. I’m so in love. She’s perfect for me.

My daughter became a Bat Mitzvah this year. One of the best days of my life. Watching her lead the congregation with such poise and grace was mind-blowing. On days when I question my ability to be a parent, I think back to that day and know I am doing something right.

Since last year I’ve taken up flying again. I joined a local flying club and started taking instruction. I thought it would be easy...it was not. I became frustrated and wanted to quit. It wasn’t fun. So I hit pause and took time off flying. I felt like maybe I was a failure, like maybe I didn’t deserve to fly again. During this summer I became the surprising friend of one of the other club members. We bonded instantly and he’s invited me flying, and invited flying back into my life. Thanks to Pat my heart is open to trying again, open to hoping again, and willing to give it another go.

I feel like I am in the middle of a significant event. And I dont know yet how it will all play out. My husband has been drinking, and although he claims to have "cut back a lot", I'm not convinced he is "okay". But, as the codependent one, I know I can't decide for him. He has also been flirting heavily with other women from his workplace, even looking lustfully at the single mother who is his best fishing buddy daughter and her "hot" friend that he didnt tell me were going fishing with them. He swears he will change, he says he is being accountable for that eith orher guys...but I keep finding out this stuff and getting more and more hurt. He tends to do stuff, like send one co worker a message saying how he has z crush on her and stuff...whenever I am away and he is by himself AND drinking. I can feel myself faking it...faking our marriage and texting him happy little messages because that is easier than texting what I really think or feel. I'm detaching emotionally, which I know is bad but I am tired of the hurt and pain and I want it to end. And it probably will...I'm waiting, like I said, this may be the big event...it may be the big "D" once again. But I'm not going to initiate it. Not this time, I am going to do what I can, within reason...to try to help our marriage. But at this point, I am in a. cloud of pessimism and hurt and I dont see any path but the one leading to divorce. I am tired of crying. I am tired of worrying. I'm tired of being told I shouldn't worry or cry over this... I am working my recovery...he said about a week ago he said to give him a couple of weeks to work out the drinking thing with God I have not seen much evidence of that happening. I wonder where I will be in a year so this is where I will put this.

I've been unemployed 9 months this year after graduating with a Masters degree in a new field. Completing my studies has been a rewarding experience, but seeing how few full time positions in the field (Library Science) has been sobering. Sadly, I never learned till after graduating that 90% of the jobs at my local library are part time. We're bad, but other local libraries aren't much better. I feel I poured a lot of time and money into a degree that I won't use.

I left the family and community I was living with for the past two years and I do not feel that I have properly come to terms with that. I am not even sure that I ever will either. I am definitely grateful for the past two years, but it is hard to swallow how unfair life is at times. I went knowing I had a return to America, the place where everyone in the world wants to be, and I realized the privilege that comes along with that. At times I am inspired to continue working in the development world, trying to improve the lives of people who had a hand in shaping who I became after these past two years. Other times, I feel selfish and want to earn a high salary and provide for myself and family. It is unfortunate how that is a normal feeling as we age. We give less and want more for ourselves. The worst part about leaving village was knowing that Nani may never remember me and will ask about me only until she reaches the age where she starts forgetting her early childhood experiences.

To boost business revenue, I partnered with three alternate revenue streams. None of them brought in significant revenue. What was more significant is how much work I was putting into it. Resentment- I felt like one of their employees Relief- I cut ties Reflection- I should believe in my myself more; my core abilities. I can do this. There will be better fulfilling opportunities.

This past year, Dan and I got married! We went to City Hall in Ypsilanti on July 13, 2018 (Friday the 13th.) We had the Mayor, Amanda Edmonds marry us. We spent the rest of the day, wandering around Ypsilanti, playing photosynthesis, taking a nap together, making ravioli, then going out to some local bars. It was local and magical and a perfect way to celebrate and say goodbye to the Ypsilanti phase of our relationship and move on to the Detroit, married, our own house phase. I am so grateful to have found Dan and gone on adventure after adventure together. Even though we're not traveling over land through Africa, climbing boulders and waterfalls, or WOOFING anymore, it still feels like an adventure. I always feel like we're figuring all of the steps out together with love and support. Our love and relationship give me strength to get through this challenging phase of my career. Thank you Dano! I love you.

It's really hard to pick one significant experience. Husband survived a critical illness, punctuated by several near fatal episodes. Old pet died. Mother died. Maybe I'm the most conflicted about the last. It seems I've been waiting for several years for her death (because of her age, because of recent illnesses), so on one hand, I am no longer waiting, so maybe a bit relieved instead. I am grateful she could go on her own terms, without apparent pain, and truthfully, without it being too hard on the rest of the family. I may be inspired by her life, and I certainly think about how I will be remembered. One thing I am not is resentful. I have had a fortunate life, in large part to the start given to me by my parents, with all their imperfections.

Hard to think of something for this one (note to self, have a more exciting 5779). I got my first job in the field I’ve been studying for the last 5 years. Just once a week while I finish off masters. It conjured up an array of feeelings, which the examples here cover quite nicely; Grateful: because I just walked in and asked for a job and got it; Resentful: because I knew but didn’t want it to be true that work would involved slaving behind a computer all day, feels like life is being drained from me; Inspired: that experience really makes me think about how I can ensure that I end up working somewhere that I will really enjoy, or creating that for myself. Overall a quality first experience with lovely and knowledgeable colleagues!

Went on my first retreat. Having the opportunity to look into myself and write without fear of having to fix things or having judgement made by others

Cheryl and I went to ITALY! We've been married for 25 years (and she turned 50) - so we borrowed, begged, and stole our way to a two week trip. We walked, talked, ate, drank coffee and released years of stress and anxiety. We found beauty and love all around us. Bella Figura is now a guiding principle in our life.

This past week my wife and I went to the cemetery to visit the graves of both our parents, both sets buried near each other.It was years since our last visit. It took two hours to get there. It was one of the hottest days of the year and we were parched. We found my parents' gravestones first after a long, arduous search. We found my wife's parent's grave after another almost endless search. We received instructions and maps for each search from the cemeteries' offices, both wrong. I felt like the Israelites wandering through the desert. My parent's gravestones were so old that we had to scrub off the dirt that had accumulated for over forty and sixty years respectively. I keep on having dreams of my mother living or dying or dead. I placed rocks on their graves for my children, our pets and us. The tombstones were cleaner and purer than when we arrived. So was my heart. They are dead and still alive in my soul. I am so grateful to my wife for sharing this journey to see them again. I don't have to look to heaven to feel and see and hear them. They're right here with me on earth.

In May I got to go back to Senegal and stay with my host family for a couple weeks. I felt extraordinarily grateful for the opportunity to return (thanks UF), but perhaps more importantly for the connections and people I know and love in Kedougou. My host family is truly like no other— so kind, so generous, so thoughtful— and it felt very important and special that I got to spend more time with them on my own accord. My intentions were very clear when I was there— I went to see and spend time with them, not on a quest for self-discovery like I was on during GCY— and I think everyone, even random people on the street who I talked to, were really appreciative that I put in effort to return. My time there really solidified my relationships with my host family and I felt like a valid part of the family, like I was wanted and accepted, though even writing that now I have doubts and questions about that. Everything feels less intense when you look back on it, but I stand by the feelings and thoughts I had while I was there. I’m tempted to set an intention for returning, because I do value my relationship with my host family a whole lot, but I’m hesitant to write that in this exact time and place. I feel hesitant to set any concrete intentions at the moment. Hm.

Being back in London in June was amazing, even if just for three days. I felt so connected to the place even though I hadn't been thinking about it, and I had missed even the smell. I loved all the time we spent there and it was far too short. I miss England so much, I realised. I feel like I want to be there, and it just brought up a lot of the stuff from when I was doing my MA. I mean, I thought I'd be a post-doc researcher living in England at this point, maybe with a baby. And instead, here I am again in Louisville with the whole slate wiped clean again, where no one really wants to hear about my experiences abroad or give them the validation of a true life. Is it because everyone is jealous or something? It feels like I'm a ghost wandering around sometimes. People can't and more importantly don't want to relate to living in Vietnam when they are from the suburbs! It's just how it is. I miss England and I miss the life that I wasn't good enough to reach for. That's what it feels like, at least. If I'd been better at my MA or chosen a different path then we'd be in a comfortable European life with a baby and no one would have their eyes glaze over when I'm telling them about what happened in my summer. It is probably not true, and feelings lie of course, but I still feel it. But being back in London was just perfect. I will always love that city.

On the surface it doesn't seem very significant, but renewing my lease on my condo in Fl for another year was a major life decision for me. I had to decide to commit once again to the new path I am on and find ways to make it work, to be happy in my choice. I admit to questioning my decision repeatedly and while I know it is the right thing for now, I keep wondering if it's the right thing for forever! Uncertain is my current state.

All of my grandparents passed away. Missing Nana and Papa has been hard. I am relieved that Nana no longer has to live without Papa. I am sad that it caused pain. I can't understand what it really will mean for my life. It still hasn't fully hit me. I loved them so much. I feel bad for mom and dad. Everyone will be ok, they had a good life.

Life is such a conglomeration of little things, at least at my age. It is difficult to pick just one SIGNIFICANT experience. I choose (out of many) that my daughter has come 'home' to the US. Gannett is almost 30, completing her first year in a Master's program at Columbia Teachers College. My children are adults. They own their own lives now. They make their own choices. I can see them grown, flawed, beautiful people. I am grateful that the terrible things that I feared might happen (all the classics: abduction, drugs, accidental death, serious illness--I'm a parent in the modern times, and I could go on) have not. I am relieved that they have reached this point. I am so glad that they have a chance of good, satisfying lives. I've seen the cruel twists that life and offer. I have seen that most go through life with some suffering and some triumphs. Nothing is perfect. But every so often, things work right, and there are bits of the sublime. My baby is grown, a beautiful, self-reliant, intelligent, and sensitive girl. Given some luck, she will build a good, productive, satisfying life. Her older brother is finally starting to come into his own. I am relieved and crossing my fingers.

I became a dad - it has been the single greatest experience of my life. She is now the focus of everything I do.

I was 50 in January. I don’t feel old or anything but it did make me think about there being a shorter amount of time left to do the things I really want to do. And that made me think about how, despite various adventures inbetween, I’m basically still doing the same kind of job I’ve been trying to get out of since I fell into it when I left college and didn’t know what I wanted to do. The result is I’m leaving my legal office job in just over four weeks to train as a stud hand and even if it doesn’t work out or turn out to be not how I really want to spend my time, I won’t be doing a job that bears no relation to my values just because it pays well.

I graduated law school. It was the culmination of my dreams since I was a teenager and even though I'm articling now and on my way to becoming a real lawyer I still feel kind of lost without school.

someone opened me up in order to release the walled off love that i was hiding in my heart.

Sherut leumi forever changed my perspectives on age, Israel, chesed and my Avodat Hashem. There is no more important act than giving to another human being, out of gratitude for the life and dignity that G-d has given us. I have been renewed in my understanding of my - all of our- purpose in the world. I was able to be someone's מלאך, someone's אליהו הנביא, someone's only friend, someone's answered prayer. And the best part is what I got in return, because שכר מצווה - מצווה.

I had a front tooth removed as a result of infection. It is distressing and I can't speak properly. I have a partial denture that is inconvenient and which makes it hard to eat. It will cost a lot of money to be put right with an implant.

For my 60th birthday, my husband planned a wonderful party. The party itself wasn't a surprise, but he included in it the most incredible surprise that made it one of the most memorable events in my life. I knew the party would be spectacular: it was at the LA Athletic Club, and every single person Dave invited was someone I could call a dear friend. Almost everyone invited came. The food was fantastic, the venue beautiful, and the music was incredible. Liz and Jocelyn sang. Aaron and Amaris made a stunning and DELICIOUS 3-tiered birthday cake. It was perfect. The party alone would have been a once-in-a-lifetime kind of memorable event, a most extraordinary gift from my extraordinary husband. The surprise he added though rocked my world. Penny was invited to the party, and worked it out so she could come. She arrived in LA on Thursday and stayed at the Bel Air. This much I knew was happening. We met for dinner in Beverly Hills on Thursday, and the plan for Friday was that Dave and I were to go to the Bel Air for lunch. Friday night, Aaron and Amaris were to cook dinner at home for Penny and the family. When we arrived at the Bel Air Penny met us in front, and we walked to the back patio. There, in the middle was a large round table full of people. One stood up as I entered. Wait, that's ANDY! And JAY and LIZA!!!! Oh my God–ALL my siblings were there as well as Ned and Amy. What could I do but start crying and hugging everyone. I have never been so surprised in my life. I have never felt so special or so loved by my entire family. For most of my life, I have been unsure of my place in my family. Not a black sheep, just a step removed. Not really belonging to the family my Dad and Penny made with my brothers and Peggy, Marion and Liza. I can now banish those feelings, for they are clearly unfounded. Whatever the reality of my relationship with my family was when I was an adolescent and young adult, it is no longer (and maybe never was) what I thought it was. I am eternally grateful for this amazing gift from my husband, and will cherish it forever.

I got slighted in terms of a job because of politics that had nothing to do with me. First, my hopes were raised in what turned out to be a false way. Then, my backup was destroyed because the people who should have been looking out for me were busy doing other things. This definitely left me angry and discouraged. I think this coming year shouldn't be so bad though - the stupid politics are in the past, and I can do more to help myself towards the position I should have gotten this year.

The birth of our daughter, Grace Sophia. We have prayed, wished, hoped and worked for her for the last six years. The journey was a hard one full of heartbreak, grief and disappointment. We finally conceived with the help of IVF and an egg donor. She was born about five weeks ago and the last five weeks have been life changing. I did not know what it would be like to love someone like this and feel so totally overwhelmed by the tenderness, love, protectiveness and vulnerability of caring for a baby. It’s hard work but in some ways it feels like the easiest thing I can do. I’ve wanted this for so long and now she’s here. She’s bringing new meaning to my life, my husband’s life, our marriage, our family, friends, community, views of the world, etc. My life before we had her seems like a totally other life. I’m so grateful for her and this experience. It continues to unfold on a daily basis and is a constant adventure. It is a humbling and wonderful time. She is my love, my teacher, my baby.

I lost my dear dog, Hailey and got a new one, Nikki. I was extremely sad to lose Hailey, combined with a helpless feeling. It was hard to bring her to a place I think she felt safe, a place that is supposed to heal her and make her feel better, to be brought to death. I'm So glad I was there to comfort her though, even though I did not want her to go then or necessarily be put to death. I'm relieved she is out of her pain. I'm grateful I was able to care for her, comfort her and advocate for her when she fell ill. It's one of my missions to advocate and care for those who are vulnerable in society, like children, animals, the mentally ill and disabled.

I was able to identify the future field that I want to do and the future steps I want to take in order to fulfill my dream. The process leading to it was very empowering for me!

My most significant experience was my creation and performance of my one-person show, Duet, at The Marsh. It gave me a great sense of accomplishment to set the goal, finish it and peform it -- in front of 22 of my friends as well as many others. I never felt so alive so "me" as I did in that peformance. It left me with a deep yearning to do more in the theater, which I intend to do this year.

So much mental space has been taken up this year by the prospect of moving out of Canada, likely for good. I don't think I'll be able to afford an apartment, much less a house, in Toronto again. So many people think it strange that I would move at this time, but I am slowly making a home here and the daily work of keeping it together, working long hours, and not having enough time to get the house together is wearing, but the small victories of making a beautiful corner in my new home, being welcomed at my new job, and hanging pictures make me calm and accomplished. Feeling more consolidated and less transient for the first time in six years, I think, will hold me well.

I retired. It was very gratifying to hear people say nice things. I never felt important at work, and did not think I was valued. But I did feel a big void not working, and not belonging any more. Now that school starts tomorrow, I feel very, very busy, but that certainly is not the same as belonging, or having a sense of purpose. I'm not sure I will be able to have either of these in the future, and that will be sad, because being your own cheerleader all the time is tiring.

My long-distance boyfriend died via suicide. It wasn't 'just' one thing. It was mental health and it was how he was perceived by the world and it was being socially ostracized and it was the most rational suicide decision I've ever even heard of... but it hurts. It doesn't matter that I believe in a soul, that I know it's not the end of the story. I'm here, he's not, and it's likely to be years before the story truly picks back up. So I'm sad, and I'm angry, and I'm resentful of all the reasons he had to leave. I want to fight to combat other people being left in the same position, and combat people being in the position to make a decision like he made. It's like life restarted with a new direction, I just don't know what it is. It's more like my boat got cast adrift, and I haven't figured out yet how to start the motor, much less which direction to steer in.

Patrick and I broke up and I couldn’t be more grateful and relieved to have moved on from that relationship. It was horrible at the time, but it allowed me to grow, learn, and realize that I don’t have to settle. I met someone new who is wonderful - who listens to me and truly values who I am as a person. I hope I can learn from this experience and remember that I don’t have to settle for anything - not a person, not a job, nothing - and that I deserve to be happy.

I would say that a significant experience that has happened in the last year is moving to LA to start a new job, new apartment, new life, ahhh! It has affected me monumentally. Not only have I been stretched professionally and personally, I have been exposed to so many different ideas and realities in camping that I never could have imagined. I am definitely grateful and inspired, but also existentially confused, questioning my last six years of camping experience. I also miss my kids I have worked with, and the ease of something stable in life. Once again, I have uprooted and almost completely started over. It is exhausting, and I hope that I will be able to find normalcy, friends, and a life in California. Oh, and a consistent exercise routine too!

I went to Israel for the first time with my husband (his first time, too). We went with a group from Emanuel led by our Rabbi, Craig Marantz! It was eye opening and simply amazing. I need to go back, not right now, but in a year or two!

My dad died. It made me think about how grateful I was that I took care of him. It also made me feel unrooted, that there are no more links in the chain between me and death, that I need to find more meaning in my life.

I lost two of my pets this year. They were both old and pretty much died of old age but they had been with me so long and were part of my family that their loss will be with me for a long time to come. I am terribly sad that they are no longer here.

I was hospitalized this year after suffering through months of stomach issues. Turns out, I have Crohns Disease and they had to remove part of my bowels. The experience was a little scary, but both my parents flew in to be with me for the first half of my hospitalization. I am a grown adult, so I was surprised by how much I needed them there during that time.

I finally got my knee and ankle surgery and it was so very different than my experiences with surgery during my marriage. I felt so loved and cared for by all my friends. Patricia Auerbach took me there and back. Rhona came up from Portland to care for me and was very attentive. Orna, Ellen, Ken and Sophie all came to visit me. Sonya and Ellen cooked for me. But most of all, they understood and didn't shame me for being incapacitated, which is what I felt from David. It also seems that me knee is already feeling better, and the surgery was just 5 days ago!! I was really worried that I was foolish to have the surgery, as I was only given a 50/50 chance of improvement. Instead, he found a flap of meniscus that was not seen on the MRI and removed it, truly fixing the problem, I hope. I'm very relieved and grateful for good friends.

I recently fell in love for the first time. Or at least, it was the closest I've come to what I imagine love being. It ended quite poorly, which caused me more pain than with any other past connections, but I cherish the experience for what it was and what it meant for me. It was the first time I allowed myself to accept the love that someone had for me, and to reciprocate it fully and lean in. It prepared me to open up for future partners, and to be as transparent as possible about what I intend to get out of it (in this case, I didn't really know). But it also taught me the dangers of falling in love before establishing a friendship with someone; there's nothing stopping this from happening, and when it does, you realize you will inevitably have to let go of this thing that feels so good and face the hurt that comes with it. Friendship before love, I think, is critical. I don't regret the experience in any way. It was deeply painful and deeply beautiful, and it has shaped for the better the way I will approach my romantic pursuits.

This August I thought my mother was going to succumb to her alcoholism. It all happened so fast after years of moving in a painfully slow motion reel that is addiction. It was the first time my siblings and I would be together since my brother’s high school graduation, 9 years ago. We went through decades of photos, bonded, and took each moment we could with mom in the hospital that she was present and awake for. We held her hands and stroked her hair as her body detoxed, releasing the poison from her body. Then day by day, we saw her start to improve. The sparkle in her eye return. I remember washing her feet, her body, just touching her body to comfort her and let her know I was there. Life put into perspective is so moving and powerful, so painful yet so beautiful. I will enjoy each moment I can with my mom, as long as I’m fortunate to have her.

I got a new job after a long time looking. It’s affected everything - I’ve been taken out of my comfort zone and into a new environment and had to prove myself. It’s been tough and exhausting in different ways. I am grateful and very relieved to be out of a very unhappy situation

I have grown close to my partner's parents in the past year. Having had an abusive home during my childhood and adolescence, I am grateful for and blessed with my loving environment today.

In the past year my significant experience was the day my wife and I had a large fight. We were both scared, a laptop was broken, we knew something needed to change. That was the day I committed to myself and my mental health. I realized I couldn't help anyone else unless I helped myself first. And the amount of stress that I have going on is large, it's only natural for someone to be going through mental stress and issues with the amount of shit we have had to deal with in the last 4 years. I am grateful for finding a positive to come from this experience.

I pursued a romantic relationship at great cost to myself, knowing it would be risky and potentially wouldn't be an equal partnership. He's smart, talented, and amazing... but he's antisocial (naturally) and just decides to wander off and not tell me. I feel resentful because of how cruelly he behaved toward me at times when he felt impatient, or how little I felt I mattered at times. I feel resentful because I stuck with HIM through EVERYTHING, but he didn't stick with me through everything. In the end, I wasn't able to be mindful and on top of my own negativity that developed due to my resentment around some of the ways he behaved; however, I'm inspired, now that it's over, to work on myself and get back to where I was when I realized I needed to hole up all winter (in 2017) and woodshed on my musical projects and home repairs and improvements. I really hate him right now. I've cursed him in every breath. I never mattered enough to him. I ignored those calls and messages to myself: FOR WHAT? I am depleted. I hope I can get my energy back. He did have good qualities, and it's that bit that I miss dearly. I miss him. But, I'm also glad to be out of that sometimes noxious and emotionally oppressive, walk-on-glass, don't-anger-the-bear, I-left-town-yesterday-and-didn't-bother-telling-you-because-I'm-a-"free-spirit" situation. Fuck that asshole. I'm a free spirit, but I consider my partner in all things. He did not. He would not. He's still a teenager. He treated every attempt to connect like a threat to his independence. LAME. Adolescent in his thinking, in relationships. I am not, and I ignored the red flags, because I had to something to prove: he was my "one who got away" all those years ago, and I wanted to be with him regardless of how fat he'd gotten, how much he drank in the years before he found me again, how much of a redneck he'd become, and how crazy his ex (with their child) was. I should have run like hell. Additionally, since things ended, I've been reintegrating myself with old friends and had the opportunity to see a couple, whom I've missed and wanted to reconnect with. It was wonderful for my soul, and I am starting to find my way again. I will never choose a relationship again nor give all my trust immediately, nor have a secret agenda to land my partner at any cost, simply because he's an "old flame," or because he was my ideal back then. Things happen to change people, sometime in bad ways, sometimes in good. I should have never pursued it, but it got me to a place where I know I'll never again make that mistake. It was expensive. SO expensive. So yeah. :) Getting back on track now. I hope for a time when I'm not angry with him, because of the ways he treated me sometimes. He tried. But what a goddamned slob. He was living in the filthiest conditions when I found him again. Horrible. I cleaned his house. Made his space better. He resented me because I did too much for him (like washing his HORRIBLE-smelling clothes three times to get the BO and stink out of them). ASSHOLE. He had terrible hygiene. Rotting teeth. I overlooked all of it, because he was once my secret love, the man I wanted more than anyone else. A fellow musician. Gorgeous. Healthy. Talented. Intelligent. Sweet. Hot. Beautiful. I hope for a time when I can be unloved and unwanted by this person, and not give two fucks, realizing that what someone else thinks of me doesn't matter. I need to take that all the way in and get back on track. Also why did I pick a guy with this many problems... he couldn't even keep an erection more than five minutes because of his newfound obesity. The dysthymia too. What was so wrong with me that I felt I could overlook all these horrible traits just to get to the gem underneath. I came to him as a mostly happy person. I left as a very unhappy one. NEVER again.

Dad passed away in January. I was inspired by how he handled the last few months and his choice to make use of California’s aid in dying law. He passed peacefully and his last few months were filled with gratitude for the good life he has had. In his last few weeks he used his remaining energy to write notes to all of their friends in the retirement community. When I asked why he was doing so much work, he said it was to make sure that their friends would be there for Mom after he was gone. I am grateful he passed peacefully and with dignity, and that he did not suffer. And I miss him; very much.

Another year of death. My brother died and a parent-in-law died, also, within the same month. In both situations, it presents an opportunity to move along from these dysfunctional relationships and concentrate my energies on other members of my family and friends and eliminates the worries about having to deal with these family members in the future.

I went to sleep for the first time in two years not hoping I would not wake up. It was a sign that I was getting over being deserted by my partner. I can't honestly say I'm my happy old self, but it is a sign that I am healing. So, I am grateful and relieved.

I was diagnosed with multiple PEs a year ago and it was a very frightening experience. It took me over a month to feel like I was starting to physically recover and I am still emotionally recovering. For me, being faced with my own mortality has been difficult to really own and process. It is easier to just try and move on but I don't think I really have. I feel that I have let the busyness of everyday life capture all my attention at the expense of potential personal growth.

Really two experiences in the last year. The first is from work - where there was a massive layoff, but yet I was chosen to be part of a select group to run corporate research. It has really opened my eyes to my self worth. The second is health related. I have been battling being severely overweight and now my weight has caught up with my through both elevated fatty liver disease and high blood pressure. This is really a wake up call to improve my overall health to be able to enjoy my later years.

In the last year, Mike & I got married! it's pretty unbelievable to think that I, the worst dater of all time, found someone I wanted to stay committed to & spend the rest of my life with. Our wedding was easily the most joyful day of my life, filled with friends & family & dancing & a freaking pierogi bar &, of course, so much love. We were blown away by the love & friendship of the whole day; we felt like the most special people in the world & so, so fortunate to know the people we do. The past year has been filled with navigating our first year of marriage - but really, there's not so much navigating to be done. Yes, we sometimes argue & disagree & get it wrong, but overall, this life together feels natural, like it was meant to be - & that is perhaps the greatest gift of it all.

A few months ago I decided to be Jewish. This is significant because I've always just been Jewish. But, I've never done it with intent. So this year, I'm going to live Jewishly. I don't exactly know what that is going to mean for me, but I know it will be a big change. I'm curious if I will be able to increase my Jewish "faith" or only my Jewish actions. I already live a life guided by the principal of Tikkun Olam, but I feel the need to increase other parts of my spiritual practice, as well. I'm excited and inspired and curious to see where this journey will take me.

I GOT MARRIED!!!! Mike and I got married. And engaged. I am very, very grateful. I think the engagement was perhaps more monumental than the wedding. I was so elated and thrilled. And since we'd been together so long, finally getting engaged was the official step. Planning and carrying out the wedding was important, but deciding to do that was the big deal. But the wedding and marriage was so great! It's so awesome to know I'm going to be with someone who challenges me, makes me laugh, makes me happy, and believes in me, for the rest of our lives. We are a unit now, and I am so, so happy and grateful. I think I'm also really relieved to have the wedding over. There was so much stress leading up to it, and then once it happened I was relieved and happy. The honeymoon was such a nice time to remember WHY we picked each other.

I decided to take a semester off of school and focus on mental health. This is something I really needed but didn’t want to do.

I can't think of an answer to this question, and that makes me feel like I'm leading an uneventful life. It makes me think that maybe my memory is fading, or that I simply don't spend enough time in reflection on the experiences I have. So many opportunities and chances at exploration both physically and mentally are at my disposal and I feel like I'm wasting my life away on the couch. My body is not healthy, I make horrible decisions with regard to the future and I often feel lonely and worthless.

Camp Nai Nai Nai. It was just be of the major reasons I made the leap to grad school! I am grateful and inspired by my peers and excited about this new opportunity!

My father passed away I am, of course, very sad but also grateful for all the random acts of kindness and the loving care given to my Dad. In the course of all this I have learned so much about what it means to die well and the grace of hospice. One day, in the hospital, I witnessed my Dad blow a good bye kiss to my Mom. There was a very sweet side to my parents’ Love for one another. For all of this I am immensely grateful.

I got offered a job in Ireland. A great job. More money than expected, lots of benefit, good for my career. Ad I said no. Because it would have taken me away from the path I wanted. And 2 weeks later it happened. I got a job offer. And saying yes to that changed all. A new job, city, country. Single again, but on the path, on my path, the one I wanted, the one I knew it was there, but I just had to wait a bit longer

I was hospitalized for suicidal depression. And I am deeply grateful. I learned just how generous the people in my community can be - I was inundated with caring visitors, someone (despite my protestations) gave me a check to cover all the income I lost while in the hospital (I'm a private piano teacher, so had no sick leave to rely on), and I was surrounded by love when I returned to "real life." I also learned more about the parts of myself that will always be with me, even when I am at my lowest point. During my time in the hospital, I actually ended up giving impromptu piano lessons to some of my fellow patients. I learned that not just my teaching abilities, but more fundamentally, the kindness and compassion that represent my best self will still be accessible to me no matter what my circumstances. I can't say all the sources of anxiety/depression/pain in my life are gone, but I came away with some inspiration to lean into when all else seems lost, and for that, I am grateful.

My youngest daughter has been cleared for growth hormones. She's 7 years old and the size of a 3yr old due to fighting aggressive cancer twice. It has taken years to get this and is a great relief that her life will be considerably improved.

In the past year my partner and I started talking about having a kid. And for lesbians, that talking means talking to a lot of other people. We talked with each other and went back and forth a thousand times, alternating who was excited and who was lackluster about the idea. Finally we said, ok let's move to the next step, let's try to talk to other people about having a kid. This meant we had to talk to a man. Which man? How do you decide? Do we want to know him or not? Back and forth back and forth. Ok, this man, we're gonna ask this man who we know. And so, we asked that man. Wow, said that man. And then all three of us went back and forth and back and forth. Sometimes I was afraid to talk and sometimes my partner and I talked too much and sometimes the man said this is a lot and we should talk some more. After a while he said, I think it's a yes. And we were all excited and afraid of what it meant to agree to something that might happen sometime in the future. So then we needed to talk to the doctor. My partner and I talked to the doctor and then the doctor talked to the man and then the man went to see another doctor who sent his results back to doctor number one who said, looks pretty good your turn uterus. I talked with the doctor while she had her hand inside of me. Looks good, she said, A+ ovaries, but still you never know. Now the man needs to talk to another doctor and fill out these forms and you and your partner need to talk to a psychologist and a lawyer and then we can all talk together again. My partner called the psychologist and I called the lawyer and in the meantime we talked to our parents and friends and said, yes being queer is quite the adventure and we all talked and talked and talked. About a month ago the lawyer emailed me to set up a meeting to talk some more, and I havent emailed back.

I stopped going to the synagogue on Shabbat. I used to go every Friday night and every Saturday morning, but I stopped going. It doesn't do for me what it used to. I don't know how much of that is because I'm feeling overwhelmed by other things going on and I just need time alone, and how much is for other reasons.

In the past year, three of my best friends got married. It made me evaluate my own attitudes toward relationships, and re-evaluate my relationship with each of these friends. I feel more confident in the strength of my relationship with all three of them, but feel that I need to invest more time in my relationship with Victor. I didn't realize how strong that relationship still is. I think I need to make a point of calling Victor, Sean, John, and my grandma more regularly.

This year my daughter Ellie graduated from high school and started college at BU. It feels like the end to a very long, hard chapter. I am so proud of myself and my children. We have all come so far and truimphed over the unexpected but at the same time it wasn’t easy and I would have preferred that the past three years had been easier and less fraught. I love my life and appreciate the growth and see the good but that doesn’t mean that I wish my life had been different. Its hard to hold these two things in my head- that I love the life I have now but I also miss the life that I didn’t have, what we didn’t all get because of bob’s death. One of the things I am looking forward to is living this new normal, embracing the existence of this defined threshold. Going forward knowing where the bottom is. Figuring out and charting the next things. Three years out, I feel enough healed, like I don’t have to let Bob’s death define me or the kid’s lives. That it can be more of a data point than a seminal event- even if it was a seminal event.

This past year of living with Jon has been a big change transcending a few parts of my life. It has been wonderful experiencing this keeping and open kind of love. It has also been scary in a lot of ways, to think about committing myself more formally to Jon. I fear both that I will hurt him and/or he will hurt me, that this is inevitable and we won't survive it. My life has changed so much with him in it, for good and bad. I've gained weight and lost motivation to be as social as I have been. I also feel more open to love and life's possiblity than I have before. So that feels conflicting. I'm so grateful for our love and ready to fund the balance between a single life full of exercise, friends and activities; and my relationship life which is quieter, more stable and focused in nurturing what is important.

I started my official conversion with Rabbi Josh Brown in May. I couldn't have been more nervous when I first went to meet him; I was so nervous that I had my friend drive me instead. What I found with him was a totally welcoming experience, and I was so completely relieved to find such a warm reception at his synagogue. At this time, I am halfway done with my conversion, and I am so grateful for having the chance to get this far. I am learning so much, and I can't wait to keep learning. I am feeling trepidation about my upcoming mikvah this winter/spring, because the change will be so permanent, which is simultaneously intimidating and comforting. I already feel like I've been changed by this experience, and I can't predict where it will take me next.

My father died. I am sad, relieved, exhausted and terrified. I miss him; I do not miss the ravages of Alzheimer's; I must begin a new chapter and believe God will guide me through prayer and action. The road will be curvy. I wish it to be less tiring than the last five years.

I met the woman who I truly believe is the love of my life. As of right now she fullfills all that I was looking for in a partner. She does incredibly good work in the world. She is wonderfully bright and uses that intelligence to benefit others. She is a loving and involved parent. She is fit. She is both kind and directly honest regarding her expectations, doubts and certainties. She is unafraid to share me with her peers and family. I am so grateful for so many things in the last year and hope this focus on JJ does not diminish all the wonderful things I've been grateful for in the last year, family, health, friends, and profession.

My mother died. I am relieved because I don't think she had a good quality of life and because she had a good death. But I am sad because I realize how alone I really am. For better or for worse, I knew I could always call my mother to tell her stuff - to get her approval for the success of the kids - to get her ear. I also realize that, while I have 3 siblings, I really don't have anyone close to me. I don't want to share anything with them about my kids because it is bragging and that just isn't acceptable. It is times like this that I wish I had a husband - a long-term husband - I wish that I had some adult in my life on a day-to-day basis that I could share my feelings with.

In the past year I did a lot of soul searching. I thought I needed to separate myself from my family to really find myself. My husband and I were on the verge of separating. I was going to pull myself out of my daughter's life permanently. We were going to give him full custody so that way he could get whatever financial assistance he could to help support her because I would be paying rent on my own flat. Separate from him, separate from her. My own space. My own silence. My own room to breathe. He agreed to this because he thought it would make me happy but he didn't understand how I could be happy without them. He wasn't the only one. So many people respected my decision but couldn't wrap their heads around it. It almost happened. But it didn't. And I am so grateful. i have a newly appreciated 'lease' on my family life. My husband continues to dote on me. I have a new found love for my child. I was steps away from leaving everything I know. At this point, I can't imagine my life without them. She started kindergarten this year and if I had left, I would have missed so many milestones. I am so grateful I stayed.

I quit a job that had become increasingly uncomfortable, and which I feared could harm current and future career. It was difficult: I burst into tears on handing in my resignation letter. But coincidentally, within an hour of realizing I could quit, I found a notice of another position with many desirable aspects, and eventually moved into that spot with no break in employment. It's been mostly a good change. The pay isn't nearly as good. But the change in my life, and what I'm able to do apart from work, has made me a much happier person. Looking back over the last few years, I see a progression toward striving for a good life less than a good career.

Just after the High Holy Days last year, I met a woman for dinner. We've been through so much this year, and we know we will be together for life. After so much trauma and heartache in my life, finding lasting love has been a surprising, inspiring, and challenging experience. She has a son, now 7, from a previous partnership. I will be adopting him. Being a father has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life! On par with being a partner, for sure. I knew that I wanted a family, but I never could have guessed how enriching for my life that would be. These things have made me, by far, a better person. How can I ask for kindness, compassion, patience, listening, or joy to be valued in the world if I do not teach them to my son or show them to my partner? I said in my answer last year that life is not what we plan, life is what happens to us. I've found so many blessings in the last year, and I've been working more to share that abundance with others. I will add, too, that with the joy and calm brought by having this family, I have found the strength to pursue so many other dreams. Wishing a good and sweet year to all!

Jonathan Hess died. Resentful. He was one of several losses this year while my mom is slowly and sadly deteriorating. This feels like she is the Fisher King.

My uncle died about a month before my cousin’s wedding. It taught me to put the past aside and start being more friendly to my family even if I don’t care for them sometimes.

I started my band at long last, which was great and has been rewarding so far. I'm happy to be able to play my songs with my friends.

It has been a quiet year overall. One significant change has been that my husband's parents moved out of their long-time home in the Boston area, and into a senior living apartment complex less than 10 minutes from where we live. I am mostly happy and comforted that they are so near, as we see them much more often, and are available to help them if need be. However, I am a little concerned that having them nearby as an easy social connection has decreased some of our motivation to make sure we plan social events with other friends. We still do have friends, of course, and get together with them fairly regularly, but I think we should be making more of an effort to preserve and increase those relationships.

Watching Amanda Palmer live. It was an accident of sorts, i just happened to catch the show being advertised and grabbed tickets within minutes. i always wanted to see her, and she didn't disappoint. watching amanda on stage is like seeing the deepest parts of yourself reflected back at you with unwavering honesty. she's always been a steady point for me, and having her there, drinking wine and talking about the worst parts of her life and the best parts in equal measure, interacting with the crowd, it revolutionised how i see my identity toward others. i am beyond grateful, and so humbled to have been able to wait and meet her after. i crouched down, suddenly forgetting everything i wanted to say, and thanked her for her livestreams, for being present, and giving me something i had to watch immediately, because it's helped so much. she held my hands, stared into my eyes without blinking, and said they help her as much as they do me, and she's sorry she wasn't doing them more, as if she owes me anything at all. sitting in a room full of strangers and listening to someone i feel i know fairly well is rarely a sensation of community, but that's exactly what this was. it marked the beginning of a shift in me, a shift toward being even further myself, listening to music that makes me feel things. i'm realising now that macklemore and my entire london week was another formative experience, but i think amanda climbs higher.

I am a cancan dancer. I went to the cancan gala and met all former cancan dancers, so charming and strong and audacious. I am proud to be part of this culture empowering women and making them stronger. Also a positive feminine influence for the younger in the society. So glad I did the audition and start dancing. I didn't even know I like dancing so much. Further to cancan I also did my first burlesque show and it was fantastic. I feel better with my body image, stronger, more independent, with a world of opportunities open in front of me. I want to get better and do more...

Giving birth to my son, I was terrified, I’m forever grateful to have given birth to such a happy lovey dovey baby!

Chester from Linkin Park took his own life in July of 2017. Linkin Park has always been a support for me throughout my life. Losing Chester was really hard on me. So much so that I had to start taking depression medication. I’m grateful for the music he gave us and even more grateful that I had the privilege to hear him. I miss him terribly.

I was accepted into the Master's program at Macquarie. What an Honour! What a privelege! What a gift! What an opportunity. My heart opened and I have already learnt so much. The world is not out-to-get-me anymore. The world is opening up before me with hope and optimism. I have met such incredible, generous and intelligent people this year. My heart is breaking with promise.

In the last year (actually, just a few days after completing last year’s 10Q), I met and have developed a wonderful relationship with my now boyfriend, Mike. I am extremely grateful for all the circumstances that brought us together, and the wonderful ways we have enriched each other’s lives. I am eager to watch how we continue to grow together and the life we are working towards building. I am grateful that he is someone so caring, kind, intelligent, understanding and cute! I have also felt Some relief finding someone that so well fits me and shares many of the same ideas, goals and values. I had a hard time imagining that I would be in this place in the past so it feels exciting, fun and rewarding.

My business intensifying has been the most significant part of my life this year. Reading back on last year, I was just starting to get back into working after a long period of quiet. Now, I feel almost too busy! It's been almost exactly a year since joining this business, and the process has worked me hard. In my clearest moments, I see this as a perfect classroom to learn, play, grow, and be challenged. In the harder periods, I feel caged, fed up, question my integrity and get frustrated. I really appreciate the playground for learning. I've definitely gotten motivated to learn new skills and become more focused. I have a place to direct my intention, instead of just generally trying to figure out what I want. That's a fun challenge. But I can also still feel the friction of the things I wish I were doing: teaching, connecting with people, aligned with a passionate community.

I started taking care of my diabetes. I got a new doctor, started 2 medications, got through the side effects, and saw my blood sugar get into range. It makes me feel more in control, and I guess it makes me feel like my self-worth might be growing. It makes me feel less like giving up, like I might have a future worth having.

Meeting Arliss has proved to be an incredibly positive experience. I am incredibly grateful. The work I've done with him has challenged the way I perceive my own desires, and the way I choose to engage with them. The experience is complex, I still have the desires I have, I still want financial wealth, and I still want a certain type of success as an actor. Now I am pursuing a series regular job. But I am much more fluid with my desires. His voice also resonates in my head, that being of use, or service to the people I'm sharing time and space with now, is really what makes life worth it. That's what makes achievement, and striving, worth it. Being of use, serving others, being present, makes any pursuit worth it.

Wow, so many. I guess the most obvious answer would be graduating from college, moving halfway across the country the next day, and starting a new job (my dream job) as a reporter the day after that. Everything happened so quickly, but I think in the past two-and-a-half month since it happened, I've had some time to process. I'm incredibly grateful for this opportunity and relieved to have a job after months of stress applying to 75 news outlets across the country. But I think I'm most grateful for what this experience (so far) has taught me about my self. I spent most of my life up to this point striving for perfection, always moving towards a goal. Though I was always driven by passion, and not merely by resume-building, I was constantly feeling like I wasn't good enough, and comparing myself to others. Since getting this job and starting my career, I finally feel like I've been able to focus on the task at hand and see that I am good enough and that I'm on the right path. I have no idea where I'll be this time next year. That's a bit scary, but I'm also ok with it. I just hope I'm still feeling as thankful and humbled and centered as am now then.

I played in the Victorian Championships league and the Nationals tournament with my basketball team. It made me a much better player and it was amazing to play at such a high standard.

I finally podiumed at the World Championships. At the time, I was relieved more than anything. Now that I look back, I'm incredibly proud. I put my body through a lot and I'm very grateful for many reasons... mainly that that I'm satisfied with my performance, and that I now have the mindset and freedom to take care of my health and move into whatever new opportunities that come my way.

I completed the first year of medical school. I failed my first test. Together, those two things have greatly affected me. Failing has demolished my sense of worth and confidence. I had to re-navigate who I am as a person because it's clear that I can no longer identify as the best student and that has been really tough. I'm grateful, probably, because that means I've had to look for other things in life that bring me joy and perhaps that will make me more resilient in the future. Often, though, I find that I am resentful of others who seem to "have it easy" or who are constantly in love with school. I think that has been the hardest, no longer being in love with school the way I used to be. However, it's a huge deal to have finished a year of medical education.

I will talk about two. This year I entered college as a freshman. Honestly I thought I would be more homesick but I am actually adjusting really well. I recently started making friends (but who knows if they’ll stick in a week from now lol). My roommate is great and I really love my classes. The work isn’t too bad and I enjoy reading and writing over calculating anyway. It’s great that so many of my exams are just essays. Also, I am planning on losing weight by going to the gym and walking around everywhere. My steps have been close to 10,000 almost every day! On a more negative note, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis only a few months ago. I was so shocked that I became very faint and almost passed out when my doctor told me. Now I’m adjusting to it. At the moment, I do not know if this is exactly what I have or if I have another disease like lupus. I just want to feel better. Right now it isn’t stopping me from too much but I think it’s causing a lot of fatingue and some pain in my hands. Hopefully by next year I will have a full diagnosis and my medicine will be working.

I lost 7kg, to be under 90kg again. I am relieved that I can do it.

I had a baby and became a mom! It has changed everything. This year has been rewarding, exhausting, awesome, and scary. I can’t believe he’s almost a year old. At work, I’ve learned not to sweat the small stuff. At home, I’m trying my best to be everything he needs. I just want our family to be happy and healthy. He’s perfect and I’m so glad he’s here!

Transferred to a new department at work. Was initially excited for having a new opportunity to develop my career but it quickly turned into a hell because my boss was an asshole.

I ended a long standing relationship with a friend. It allowed me to see some patterns in myself and to recognize the truth about that person as well. I am grateful and relieved. I was resentful but it was only because of the lies this individual told. I feel inspired to live my own truth and to be a better friend to myself.

This has been a tough and eventful year in a lot of ways. We have been preparing for Molly to go away to college, and she has now spent three weeks there. She is having a typical adjustment trauma, in that her roommate is extremely unfriendly, and makes it clear she wishes Molly weren't there. She also invites friends over all the time and they are loud. But we have talked and I think she will try to deal with it. It is hard for me to sit back and let her deal with it, and I worry about her getting depressed and anxious. Something else really tough happened in early March. My friend and colleague, Jerry, died relatively suddenly. For a while, people had talked about him smelling like alcohol at work, but I poo-poohed them, because I didn't believe he would do that, and he never seemed affected. For a few years, he has also been complaining of various ailments, particularly back problems and neuropathy. Well, it turns out that he had cirrhosis, and this was the source of the problems. None of us knew, except perhaps his partner. He became seriously ill in February, was hospitalized for a couple of weeks, and then was released home on Sunday, and died on Friday. I went to see him on Monday, and there were a number of people there. We didn't really talk except superficially, but I did kiss his forehead and tell him I loved him. I knew then that he wasn't going to last long, but I thought maybe I would be able to get in one more visit. Since them, I have tried to be more responsive to his partner, but since he lives out of town, it's really hard, particularly with everything going on with Molly and college. I'm also struggling with some arm pain, and teaching, so I'm trying very hard to just stay afloat. I really wish I could just rest. Not going to happen. Only a little less than six years before I plan to retire. On top of that, the shitshow in Washington hasn't gotten any better, but it hasn't really gotten as bad as many of us feared. It's more like we're treading water in raw sewage, but keeping our heads up.

Almost a year ago I went back to work after having a baby. The first couple of months were really tough, with my son getting sick, me still breastfeeding (feeding overnight sometimes, and pumping at work), and sleep deprivation. I felt in a tired fog a lot of the time and it was a weird adjustment to just be sitting at a computer working, or chatting to someone, without my mind half occupied by tending to a baby. And my son took a while to adjust to childcare and would cry when I dropped him off and that would break my heart. But at the same time I loved it. I enjoy my work, my colleagues are nice, and it was nice to spend my day doing something I felt half-competent at and where there was some containment and predictability to what I had to do (even though it can be a tricky and stressful job with some ambiguities). I am grateful for the circumstances that meant I could go back to work - I was able to find childcare, work is part time and close to home. I guess with the power of hindsight, I can see that things started getting easier and more fun with my son around that point. How much of that was due to me being back at work and happier and more able to cope with parenting as a result, is hard to know. If I had my time again - or if I have another baby - maybe I would or will spend longer at home full time. But you make the decisions you do as best you can in thyour circumstances and I know that at that time, that was right for us and it worked for me.

I got promoted! My reaction was a combination of happiness and "freakin' finally".

There have been several and I am grateful for the biggest three. Mike breaking up with me and leaving me in the parking lot, Roland graduating from bootcamp and getting fired from MCSN. I am grateful and inspired by them as I can see the good in all. My life is messy, my feelings are messy, I don't like messy but there it is. All of the situations effected me by serving as wake up calls so I am relieved and now grateful for the experiences. Mike was the wake up that I was wasting time with him. Roland is squared away freeing me to move on my own. Getting fired. I asked for it. It gave me the space to breath through the transition of moving to Brooklyn and Africa. I can't think of anything that I resent happening in my life.

Hard to pick one. I will pick the loss of my Aunt Jane as I am actively grieving (she died one week ago). She never said a bad word about anyone and so she has been my hero since I was a little girl. I felt soothed in her presence. I will miss her and know noone who could replace her. I am so grateful she had no pain, and grateful for every day I had with her in this world (she was 92). I am not relieved, I am not resentful, I am, as I always have been, very inspired by her.

A friend became my boss and became angry towards me quite often. It was devastating at the beginning but it also made me stronger. I had to look inward a lot.

The freak car accident on March 16, 2018 shook me to the core. We walked away from something that should've been a triple fatality. I still battle the fear and anxiety of kissing death. I am so thankful to be alive. That my family lived through it and we're all okay. We were incredibly lucky. Now more than ever I feel like life is a fragile thing that we have little to no control over. I don't want to live with regrets. I've started doing things that I had put off for later. It's not that I felt that I wasn't living life fully. But with the accident, I feel awake in a way that I wasn't before.

I was hospitalized in June to have my pacer battery changed out seventeen years after getting a pacer for the first time in March 2001. My husband had expressed doubt about my need for the device while we were dating, and I’d begun to second guess the reason it was implanted. I’d attributed my heart issues to an unhappy and severely stressful life with my ex-husband, and the uptick in my health post separation reinforced my belief. I had convinced myself that the only reason I was ‘sick’was because I had been struggling to survive for so many years, so when I made the decision to finally care for myself and had gone over a decade without the need for a replacement battery, I thought that I had conquered my condition. Until two years ago, when my life got ultra stressful again: my job, my marriage and my ability to manage my daily routine were falling apart. Suddenly, I wasn’t feeling well anymore, and every time I shared how I was feeling with my husband, he dismissed my concerns and gave me the cold shoulder. I allowed my health to deteriorate to avoid being in conflict with him, and it nearly cost me my life. He showed very little empathy during my time in the hospital, and he did nothing to help me post op because my mom flew up to help me out ( and spent most of her visit focused on him ). He was not concerned about my feelings or whether I was scared or not the night before my surgery. And I realized, clearly, that he did not love me. That I am alone. That my happiness and well being are completely, 100% my responsibility and no one else’s and, surprisingly, it was liberating. I had been feeling trapped in my marriage to him, hoping that he would change. Coming to terms with his being an asshole freed me up to focus on my own needs and wants, and stop relying on him wherever I could. I am still married to him, but I no longer feel burdened by his opinion about my life, and if he left me tomorrow, I am certain that I would survive. I had been deferring my worth as I had always done , waiting for others to validate me, for fear of coming across as arrogant or selfish. Now, I feel like caring for myself is the most important part of my life, because in doing so, I control my own destiny.

When I went to the Redwoods, they came to inhabit a space within me. I feel I breathed them, or they breathed themselves, into my Soul. I’m incredibly grateful & permanently altered by this intense experience. I was inspired by their steadfastness, uprightness, generosity, patience, longevity, & their intense energetic desire to have humans listen to them. They truly want to support us now in our time of great confusion. May we hear their wisdom.

I can't possibly pick one single event, since so many life-altering events occurred over the past year.

When a pedestrian ran into the street, I had to turn to avoid them, crashing into a light pole instead. I narrowly avoided her, and everyone were healthy afterwards. It left me feeling grateful, but the process with the insurance company has been highly frustrating.

I fell in love with the wrong man.He was great at first but turned toxic for me. I was desperate to be loved and he sensed it so he took advantage. I'm glad I sacrificed my feelings and let him go.It was a painful process but right now am grateful I escaped his clutches, found myself again and loving me now before thinking of anyone else

Parkland shooting. Made me very, very sad, but inspired by the students and their activism.

I lost a baby at 8 weeks pregnant in June. It was one of the most emotionally painful things I have ever been through. It has tested my mental wellbeing and has at times unfortunately filled me with resentment towards people I know that got pregnant just as easily but didn't lose their baby. And also resentment towards people who didn't plan on being pregnant or necessarily want to be pregnant at this point in their lives but are. But it also inspires me to support others who have been through this so they aren't alone in it. At times I was mad at God but also it's teaching me to trust more in His plan and timing and not mine as He is always right and always knows what's best for my life and what my future looks like. Trying to learn to be content in what I have now and not what I don't have or what is to come.

I learned I have a biological half brother who is significantly older than me. It felt like something straight out of YA fiction, but I got to learn of his existence and meet him in the last year, all because my aunt decided to send in her DNA to ancestry.com. It never even occurred to me there could be a family secret known to my father and aunt, but not to me. Because we share a mother, and she died over a decade ago, there are some questions that can never be answered. It's a lot to process, but it's been a positive thing overall. Just weird as all get-out.

I had a baby. My son was born October 19th last year and he has changed our lives. At first it was tough. I had postpartum depression and I don't deal well without sleep in general. I had some regret in those first few months. Regret is the wrong word actually. I was just mourning the loss of my old life and adjusting to our new situation. Now, almost a year later, I have adjusted more. There are still some things that I miss about my old child-free life, but it is worth it. He is the joy of my life and has introduced me to a kind of love that I never understood or experienced before.

A big event in my life this year was coming out to my family on many fronts. I shared with my grandparents that I am gay and getting married. I shared with my parents that I am converting to Judaism. In both cases I was hesitant, unsure of their reaction, but in both cases I was greeted with love and acceptance.

I met someone and became emotionally invested, feeling like I could open up to this person and explore something more with them after being alone for the past 4-5 years. I didn’t realize or really accept that I was being mistreated in little ways, put down in very subtle situations and basically led on. I wasn’t told this person was married (and had kids), even though they were separated. I felt led on and used as a replacement for the pain that they were going through. The pain is still a little raw and I have my sad moments but it made me realize that I deserve so much more (and I’m proud to have said so and ended it). Not only that, it opened my eyes to not settling just because someone is around and willing to spend time with me. I didn’t fall for him but the idea of him. I know more of what’s important to me in a future partner and have learned more about myself in the process. It hurts less and less each day, the memories becoming distant and amusing to look back on. I’ve been in Maine for the past week which has also been incredibly healing. So even though there is pain and sadness, I know I will be okay and I am already stronger. And there’s so many more people out there in the world that will treat me well, want to try/do some of the things I love to do as much as I want to try their enjoyments and passions. Now, I let time do what she needs to do, accept it and go on to brighter things.

Are you kidding? A's stay with me for 10 months last year, because of her cancer return, and because of the sale of her house, was the biggest thing that's happened to me in the last 10 years. I never thought she would die. I never thought we would live together. Some of it was great, some of it was comfortable, and some of it was really hard. I'm very glad I did it, I wish I had been even more generous, or more confrontive, but it was what it was. And then she died. Walking the dying journey with her was really hard, quite a lesson, very important.

The work thing firming up, I suppose, getting into the groove even though it had started last year. Achieving a grace with it, I suppose. I'm grateful after the last work experience as well as insecure about it.

Many meaningful experiences. The birth of a grandson - Levi. On to kindergarten for Pauline and Camille. Meeting Susan Albright- a now-friend with whom I share and wonderful sense of irreverence, political views, as well as a back-east ethnic Jewishness. Getting politically active has been a meaningful, though frustrating, experience. I imaging I'll be saying the same in 2019. Looking back- said the same in 2017. Feelings - Grateful and most happy about the grandchildren. Glad Obama and Biden are speaking out against Trump. Frightened about Trump's ability to tap into the most base behavior to fuel in agenda.

I went to a Christian retreat which caused me to feel revitalized and really value what was happening in my life and my relationship with God through Christ. I was inspired but, I slowly lost the confidence that retreat brought because I was not progressive and active in my faith.

Oh my god this fucking year. Mom has cancer. I have knee issues still. Mary and I both went into the psychiatric hospital. I got diagnosed with OCD. Mary quit a job and started painting dogs. I am resentful this year even exists but also it’s shed a light on a lot of issues so I think we can start building it all back up. I hope. Mary is working on recovery. It’s been a year.

This year, I completed my year as a Disaster Relief AmeriCorps VISTA and began serving a year as a VISTA Leader. This is a huge accomplishment for me because I grew up doubting whether I could ever have a career due to my disability. As a VISTA, I often work more than 40 hours per week, and I'm active almost all of the time. Even though I was sick for a considerable portion of the year and some days just couldn't get out of bed, I made it work and proved to myself that I'm capable of doing something this intensive and amazing! I love knowing that I was able to make a significant impact on the community while battling my own illness. My feelings in a word: empowered.

In the past year i have been displaced from my home because of a relationship gone wrong, i am Resentful,Relieved & Inspired to be independent of all people,places & things in my life that are blockages & distractions.

My son was sick and had to be hospitalized, however briefly. I am relieved how quickly and significantly he improved and I am so grateful for that. It affected me profoundly as I became even more aware of my fierce love for him and his all-consuming significance in my life.

A experience that happened this paste year is my ex showed me his true colors. He resented a bond he paid for me and i was re-arrested and it made me on edge. I am still very angry and resentful but it gave me the courage to fight to make myself better for a man whose deserving of the woman I am. Someone who will stick around for the tough times

This year I got into Georgetown for graduate school. I was incredibly proud of myself for working hard enough to be great in the eyes of myself and others. I was happy that I finally got recognition for being smart and capable. I am excited to see how my experience will shape my career and my interests and challenge me to work harder than I've had to before. It made me excited for new opportunities, and showed me that sometimes the best way to be excited is to be there for yourself.

I traveled to Nebraska by myself & stayed for over week! I am so grateful to have had that experience & not let fear hold me back! I was so excited & got to experience so many great new things. It was probably one of the most wonderful experiences of my life! I am excited to do it again with another new place.

Cataract surgery changed my life significantly: I went from being severely nearsighted to severely farsighted. It has affected every moment of my day! Now I have 6 pairs of readers scattered around the house and 1 pair of bifocals in my purse. I'm not happy with any of them. I'm finding it very difficult to adjust; I keep forgetting where I laid my glasses down. :( I miss the past.

My significant experience that happened in the past year is that I finally have a full time job with a steady paycheck and health insurance. As much as I would like to be a dancer full-time, I know that I need to have stability in my life. My health requires it.

This year, I was able to work my way into a new job. For most of my career up to this point, I was absolutely miserable. I hated what I did, I was bored, I felt underutilized, I felt dumb, useless...you name the negative feeling, I felt it. It spiraled into depression and I ended up in therapy and on medications. Now, with the new job, I have been the happiest I’ve been at work in my entire life. It’s only been a month, but I can tell that this job has been the best thing to happen to me. I got out of a dead end, depressing environment, and into a place where I feel valued, challenged, and inspired. I’m excited to go into work every morning and while I’m working my ass off, at the end of the day, I feel accomplished. This process (interviewing, starting a new job, putting in hard work and turning out great work) has allowed me to see that I am a bright, talented, desicated individual, capable of a lot more than I ever gave myself credit for. And now, as a result, I hope that I can use this new found confidence and passion and turn it into more amazing things to come for this year and beyond.

The most significant experience of this year was losing members of my family who were once close to me. My parents blew up on Thanksgiving over something that could have been handled in a calm conversation. Instead of trying to talk about all the atrocities they accused me of, - they put up a fence and said "forget it - just move on we don't want to hear how you feel or think about it". After months of trying to explain their accusations and assumptions to my family, the chasm became only deeper and included my older brother and aunts. Even though my husband and I have made attempts to make things better, I have been hung up on by my mother at least twice. Now they both have cancer and missed my daughter's bat mitzvah. On the bright side, my younger brother who was in exile from me and the rest of the family for over 10 years is back in. Doing the math... what happened to my brother has now happened to me. Also on the bright side, I have learned so much about anger, self-control, empathy and compassion. I am passing these lessons down to my children.

I am officially an empty nester-my son just graduated from college and started a new job; my daughter is in college. I am proud of their accomplishments but I find myself often lonely and anxious

I feel like I've been pretty stagnant in the past year. The most significant thing I can think of is that I bought a new-to-me car, a 2014 Subaru XV Crosstrek with 120,000 miles. It's in beautiful shape and it's a big improvement over the 2002 Buick LeSabre I had been driving since 2005. I am a little nervous about this Subaru because of the high miles. It has to last me six years because that's how long the loan on it is. I decided to buy a warranty on it because without it, if something major goes wrong, I'd have no way to pay thousands of dollars for repairs. So now I'm in a hole financially, with $300/month for this car and really nervous about money. However, I'm very relieved to have a vehicle I can rely on. I've also been looking for a part-time job. I've applied to four or five jobs but so far, no luck. One of the jobs is with Apple as a technical specialist. I'd love to get that job but it has been a couple of weeks with no response. I'm feeling pretty insecure about working again...it has been over 17 years since I have worked. Can I do it?

I was the victim of identity theft. It went on for over 8 months. I spent over 50 hours on the phone trying to get things straightened out. It was scary that someone could spend $15,000+ in my name and not be held accountable. I felt scared, overwhelmed, sad, depressed, anxious, angry. I felt unheard and unimportant when it came to finding someone to help tell my story. I was however, grateful to Char and Renee at Cyberscout for helping me maneuver through the process, and for Dan who told me about the Identity Theft endorsement on my Homeowners policy.

Around the time that I turned 60, in February of this year, I developed a pain in my knee that would not go away. I had had aches and pains coming and going before, but this was something new. I saw an orthopedist, who informed me that I had arthritis in both my knees, and that I had no cartilage left in either knee. This information, and my physical change, sent me down a new road mentally – would I limp forever? Would I ever be free of pain? I had always taken my bodily functions for granted, as I’ve always been hale and hearty, but for the first time, I started to come to grips with the beginning of physical decline. I don’t feel bad about being old—I just don’t want my knee to hurt! I now have a new appreciation for bodily health. When I get out of bed every morning and walk down the stairs, I am thinking, will my knees hurt? Will my ankles hurt? Will I be avoiding stairs today, or will I feel mostly hale and hearty like I used to? I no longer take the simple act of pain-free walking for granted, and I feel more tuned in to realizing what a fragile flesh machine my body is. This leads me to pray for continued good health, to realize that my time here is not infinite, and to think carefully about how I want to make use of myself during the time allotted to me.

My husband’s Parkinson’s symptoms have increased with a leaning towards more,cognitive impairment. It has increased the stress in our relationship but I still feel like I am living two lives, neither is mine. I know his reasoning is diminished but it is frustrating when he asks me to do something three or four times, It is our lives and I love him very much and understand thst he cannot control this

I graduated with my Master's Degree. Part of me is relieved, and I'm somewhat proud of myself for following through with it, but I'm also upset and regretful. So far, the degree has been useless in securing me a job, and I don't feel like the program I was in adequately prepared me for my line of work. It's not fair to be upset at the program though, because it was my internship that really let me down. I picked a bad internship that created a lot of negative fallout for me. If I could go back about a year and redo the internship portion of my degree I think I'd be much happier.

Tight budget due to financial responsibility. I have had to learn how to practice patience, to be consistent, to put forth more effort. I am grateful, and inspired to remember the cost of promises, to weigh them properly, and to proceed cautiously.

Without competition, the most significant event in the past year was losing my grandmother. Our relationship was not the closest and there were many, if not most, times when we sat on diametrically opposed sides of something. I was not prepared for the impact of her death. There was shock, anger, and now a pervasive sadness. Being six hours away, I was forced to spend the first few days alone, apart from my family. My natural inclination to take charge, to take care of others, was subverted and I was forced to both deal with my emotions directly and to put myself first. These are not things I do easily, but I am working on them. This was like being thrown into the deep in of a pool while you are first learning to swim. Her death also struck a cord because, over the past year, I've become more committed to becoming a mom. Perhaps its being the first daughter of her first daughter, but I felt my lineage and the sacred femininity of my own family in ways I never have in the past. This only strengthens my commitment to having a child of my own. For the first time, I truly felt that, even if I have a child without a partner in the traditional sense, I will never truly be doing it alone. There are still times when my eyes swell with tears at the thought of my grandmother, that she will never know the great-grandchildren to come, but there is also a sense of peace, of grounding, and a surprising lack of fear.

Opening Barbershop Harmony Society membership to women on June 19th was huge... historic for the 80-year-old all-male organization, and meaningful for me as the CMO and someone who was intimately involved in the planning and preparation of the announcement. Leading up to it, I sometimes got so busy that I would forget how monumental it was, and then suddenly, walking along Broadway to home, it would suddenly hit me and nearly brought tears to my eyes. I'm honored and proud to have played a part.

Relocating to MA. We uprooted our kids, our lives, left family and friends. We found a community that has embraced and supported us, relieved to find people we connect with and call them friends in such a short time. Grateful and Inspired by the opportunities available to us while living in Boston.

I've begun trying to meditate. I was able to get into the zone one afternoon driving home from work, and it's the most relaxed I've felt in a while.

I became a mother! And holy cow has it ever affected me. Our little girl is 2.5 months old now and I’ve never felt so exhausted and unsure of myself as I do now. I am beyond grateful to have a beautiful, healthy daughter, I am so relieved that pregnancy is over and I don’t need to worry about ‘the baby’ not growing properly or miscarrying, but this mothering thing is damn hard. Way harder than I had imagined. I have way more self doubt then I thought I would, always worrying that I’m not doing enough for my girl, not understanding her cues and her cries. I’m giving absolutely every part of me over to her but yet, somehow I still feel like it’s not enough. I’m deeply in love with her but not always in love with the tasks of being a mom.

I had a baby! I am beyond grateful. Being pregnant was hard and scary but also fun and magical. Giving birth was scary and much less fun. Having Freddie and being his mom is rewarding, full of love, exciting and unbelievably fun. It's the best thing I've ever done and the thing I think I've been best at in my life. I feel so natural as his mother, I love him more than I could have ever even imagined or described before. I actually can't describe how much I love him, it aches. I feel him every second.

There were a few significant events and another significant event about to occur! Tyler, Alex and Ryan all moved up into new schools; Tyler moved to Boone to begin college. Darien started training to be a supervisor at LIDL and in just shy of 2 months Alex and Ryan will become B'nei Mitzvah's! It's been a wild year filled with triumphs and just a few stumbles along the way! Truly, I am inspired and relieved at how easily everyone has transitioned into new roles.

Fell in love with some despite trying not to do so, which made me feel grateful and also bewildered. When your self-identity is shattered and your defenses break down, it's good to be reminded that even your most concrete qualities are still just a set of responses, behavior, built up to a bunch of different experiences. When those experiences shift, or something totally new comes along, everything can change. You can fall in love all of the sudden, and probably can do a whole lot of other things too.

I was just told my final day at the agency where I represent wineries will be September 21. I feel like I've been sprung from a toxic-to-me work environment that will free up so much thwarted positive energy!! I have made great press and winery contacts, so I accomplished my mission to deepen my foothold in the wine and spirits categories.

I was promoted and my clients have reported that they love the work we share, however 3 ancillary coworkers in different departments complain. My boss loves my work however she asked me “keep being amazing but tone it a bit so they don’t feel so bad”. I’m at peace with my performance, yet I do not understand how growth instills resentment in others.

I was given a retention bonus at work that made me feel really valued. I was inspired and rejuvenated.

I was diagnosed with a very small, very early breast cancer in November 2017. Everything changed, and nothing changed. I felt utterly supported by Val, scared, optimistic, shaken, strong, and strangely calm. In a strange way I felt grateful for a wake up call that was such a shocking yet rather gentle one - missed a bullet or was just grazed by one. Memento mori became more real and more palpable for me and for Val too. I was much more worried about how Val was going to be impacted by this than about myself. My own personal lightning strike, and my realization that lightning is striking everywhere, all the time, and suddenly I see it. I want to keep my eyes open and be present to what is really real and happening to me, right now.

My husband died. My mother died. My 40 year old cousin died of the flu. Death has surrounded my family. I am strangely grateful, though. While I desperately miss my dead, I have (re)discovered an army of friends and family that have protected us. I am more at peace than I have been in years because of them.

Bad breakup. Affected me as I felt hurt, used and was like being back in the youth days as I had moved on with my life. Also felt belittled and oppressed which wasn’t a nice or easy feeling. Now I’m relieved that I’m out of it but a little resentful still.

Reconnecting with Neal and finding some reconciliation between us after all he did has challenged me as a person. It shook my sense of identity, and questioned my relationship with that experience in my life. I think that ultimately it has made me a much happier and better person.

I got engaged this year. In Austin, Texas. It's significant because I never pictured myself getting married. Granted, I'm not married yet, but this definitely sets the wheels in motion. I had one of those childhoods that was somewhere between, "Mother Dearest" and "Babette's Feast." If you've never seen either film, consider yourself lucky. The former is about an abusive, yet well loved Hollywood star who treated her adoptive kids like trash, the latter about a French woman struggling to find joy in a strict Lutheran community. Not exactly what you would consider a charmed start to life. I've struggled to find a place for myself, to find my purpose, and I figured that all families were hotbeds of pain and misery, so I wrote of marriage. A fool's game was the best I could figure it. Then I met Jakob. He's Swedish, but don't hold that against him. He's not one of those neo-rightwing Swedes who refuses to speak English to you even though you know they've been perfecting the skill since grade two. He's kind, and open-minded, and willing to see me at my worst, when I'm threatening to leave because something that he did reminded me of someone from my past and I get a flood of fear that I'm still that little kid who can't choose anything different for herself. He hold me and tells me that everything will be okay. So it was easy for me to get on one knee, and propose in our month long sublet on the east side of Austin. It's a big step for me, a woman whose only new to living life with love.

I graduated this past year from Scratch Academy and l learned what it takes to become a successful DJ. It pushed me and inspired me in ways I never thought possible. Im still on the path to make it a career and its not easy but I'm hopeful, excited, terrified all in one

I left my job. On my terms. After doing 5 interviews to earn my new job. I am grateful, relieved, and determined not to be bullied again. I am angered at the misogyny I endured.

My family moved this year in June to Westchester. It has been a hugely gratifying experience so far. I am so happy to be out of Brooklyn. I am relieved it went well and that we are settling in, and grateful that we have the resources to make such a move.

My stepfather died. Realized how important my own step-daughter is to me. Sad. Wish I could have all the time back with him again and live it knowing how important he would be to me.

Left a full time position with high stress, pressure, and poor leadership. Ironically hard to leave as a consequence of the job itself being amazing but all the logistics and treatment from top down resulting in mental health weardown for the team. Any salary or job, no matter how rewarding at times, is not worth paying for with health. That’s something that cannot be bought back.

2017-2018 was the first full year of my life, since I was 12, that I haven't worked for money in any type of job. This was not on purpose (I applied for dozens), and if it weren't for the generosity of my mother (who has let me live with her since I suffered a TBI in 2014) and my son (who has given me money several times in the last year) as well as my having taken early Social Security and being eligible for some (a vert low but useful amount of money for) Food Stamps (SNAP), I don't know what I would have done. I am grateful for all of that. But, for over 19 months, now, I've had no health insurance except for dental. I will soon need new glasses that I cannot afford. I pay (with my son's help) for acupuncture and Chinese herbs for my physical ailments. Otherwise, I see a Western medical doctor for only one visit each year so that I can qualify for my prescription medications. For that visit, I applied for and got the fees waived due to my low income. Grateful for that option as well. Fortunately, my three prescriptions are not the extremely costly variety, because I also have to pay for those myself. I keep trying to get work, but due to many factors, such as: employers' ageism and/or their preference for hiring someone who will "stay a while"; my extensive experience (which intimidates many potential employers who have a lot less than I do); the dearth of appropriate jobs for my skill set and education where I live; my physical limitations; and, my mission-based choosiness, I have not succeeded in being hired even when it's "down to the finalists," which has occurred several times. Meanwhile, I've earned a grand total of less than $50 this year for book sales and editing/proofreading gigs. I've been wondering when/if I'll ever earn money as a wage worker again (I am now 64)? We'll see. I pray for all those who are in even worse situations, who have no family to fall back on, no Social Security, no SNAP, no hope. May all beings have shelter, food, comfort, meaningful work, and physical safety.

1. Being at camp this year. I am so grateful for all the work D and I have put into our time together, and to my own changes that I have made. It made me inspired to keep on my own changes and self awareness, calm tracking, and also inspired by all these people around me that have figured out that kind of thing for themselves, and the multitude of specific ways that people can choose to connect to each other. 2. Speaking of specific ways that people can connect to each other, doing the Zero Balancing classes and the yoga therapy trade were both things that I really benefited from, and that I don't think I would have been able to get through or really deeply learn from, had I tried to do them earlier in my life. It was definitely a challenge, to be focused on learning, which I something that I so often did with my head and not my body or a more long-term storage way, and also gaining all these new skills and also touching people/being touched/sharing power. ZB classes helped me learn how to communicate clearly, assert myself and ALSO be ok with being bad at things/not knowing things/not understanding. And the yoga therapy....wow. The changes that I felt after being into my core, the humility that I learned by being unable to balance on my opposite hand and foot...really made me re-consider what it is to be an animal that is alive and moving. And then the effect it had on my mental and emotional life- not being so overwhelmed when I had kundalini or self-guided experiences, and the ability to have the consciousness to breathe during scary or hard moments. VERY GRATEFUL And I just want to say, because I am typing this alone on a rainy night, instead of going to services at the social justice group that is starting and in theory I want to go to so bad----that I am still a Jew, and that my ancestors speak through me, and that they might be ashamed of me that I am not going to services, but that I am learning to not be. I am going to therapy tomorrow instead of services, I am doing this now, I am reading my Shadow work book tonight, and I am in a period of awe. I am bringing in the new year.

I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years. I'm sad that things didn't work out. She was very sweet but it became increasingly clear that our lifestyles weren't compatible. I'm grateful for the tender moments we did have when we connected and a little relieved that I am not expected to make an hour-long drive every Friday afternoon and the traffic going to and coming from her house. I'll really miss her though, once again, I feel like there was definitely a difference in the amount of effort each of us was giving the relationship. Lesson learned: don't date anyone with grade school age children who can't be left alone or are still dependent on her as a mom, I guess?

Resigned from Kondoh because of unreasonable demand to join Metrology Group and move to HQ; Joined Maruma. Financial and general well-being aspects are yet to be seen…too early to tell.

My boyfriend and I finally rented our own place, no roommates, no family. It's been tough but as always, we've made it work. Having everything I own under one roof has inspired me to really consider what I keep around me and if they are good for me or not.

A significant experience in the past year was my second mission trip. The first was Montego Bay, Jamaica and the second was three different areas of Haiti. Haiti is both a beautiful and ugly place. Geographically the island is beautiful. The extreme poverty of its people is ugly because it could have been avoided if slave traders were not so married to slavery and power that Haiti was cut out of any trade when the people rebelled. It reminds me a lot of what we are experiencing now in the US in 2018 with the most powerful and most elite attempting to keep everything for themselves and their families alone. I am very angry and very resentful as multiple African Nations could have prospered if powerful people actually practiced what they preached. I used to dream about leaving the US, however as I read and travel to different places, countries and islands, it appears that Black people are hated everywhere and that there is no safe space for us anywhere.

My mother fell down a flight of stairs, breaking her wrist and becoming severely concussed. This happened while I was on a trip to NS working on reintegrating back into my biological family. I noticed a lot of positive changes from my parents and really appreciated their support. I put more trust back in them and felt like they showed improvement and effort. I felt hopeful about the future of my family for the first time in a long time. I also felt confused and unsure, but I knew that I saw potential for something. It changed our relationship dynamic. I visited her in the hospital, I helped her get comfortable, I started calling everyday after I left. I told her I loved her.

I went to Israel. Seeing all kinds of Jews inspired me to return to a plan that I had only dreamed about before - converting to Judaism. I am very grateful for the experience, but even MORE grateful to have my wife joining me on my Jewish journey.

A significant experience this year is that Camden left for College @ Oklahoma University. There was no way I could have been prepared for the heartbreak that would accompany this event. After being with this child since birth, watching out for him, making sure he was OK, then just leaving him in Norman, OK has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. Every small glimmer into what his life is like now, I hang on to. Whether it is a text, a snap, a call or a facetime. I am like a love sick teenage girl waiting for her crush to call. I obsess on Life 360 just looking to see where he is & what time he got back to his dorm. I worry continuously if he is OK. Yes, he is the first, which made it so much harder. I had no idea it would be so difficult to let him go. Am I grateful? I am grateful that I hope I have prepared him for this next step & thus far he appears to be doing awesome. Am I relieved? I am relieved that it appears that he has made it to all of his classes, he appears to be actually doing laundry, and he grades are good. Am I resentful? Not really, but maybe a little. He is having a better college experience in 4 weeks than I had in 3 years. Inspired? Yes, he has become & continues to become an amazing man who I am just so very proud of, and I cannot wait to see what he will do next.

I stood in my living room talking to my mom one winter evening last December; we were both in such good spirits. Just hours later I heard her voice for the last time when she called me in the middle of the night to say she didn’t feel well. I am forever changed. I lost my mom to a heart attack when I least expected it. I tried to keep her alive, I was there before the ambulance. I told her how much I loved her even though I was in shock and I have missed her tremendously every day since. Life is precious.

This past year, I was enmeshed in a negative political cycle that I didn't have the skill to disentangle myself. I experienced the whole range of emotions: grateful to be out of it, relieved that I had the means to move away. I'm feeling some lingering resentment in that I could not find a way to work with that Board. Inspired? Not sure I have any of that right now. Sad that I couldn't be of more help.

My first time falling in love. It was emotional and taught me a lot of things about myself and what I want in a partner. I’m sad that I’m no longer in love with this person but relieved we can be in a better place.

On Sunday, August 19 I was standing in the ocean at Amelia Island, Florida during a morning break from a Dr. Joe Dispenza advanced follow-up workshop. Facing away from the shore I stood on the sand where the water was up to my shoulders. The sea was quite calm and with eyes closed I allowed the gentle waves to wash me back and forth as my toes grazed the sand. I just blissed out, sending love and appreciation out as far as I could with strong emotion and energy. I suppose I was there for ten to fifteen minutes. After the first several minutes I could hear soft splashing sounds around me. At first I assumed it was the waves but I began to notice that these sounds were not aligned with the waves, and some of them were quite close to me. Upon opening my eyes I found that fish were jumping out of the water in a radius around me of say ten to fifteen feet. Many of them were quite close in, close enough that if I stretched out my arms they were within reach. Upon exiting the water I saw someone I knew on the beach, and asked if he had seen fish in the water when he went in. He said he had not seen them, but he did notice that they were jumping around me. I returned the next day and the same thing occurred. Additionally I watched other humans in the water to see if the fish did this with them, and they did not. When I returned to New Hampshire I tried a similar exercise along my Mink Brook trail. An enormous dragonfly landed on the bridge of my nose and stayed for moments. This made me feel exhilarated.

I broke up with my long-term girlfriend. She hates me for it, and posts about how horrible I am on social media. However I don't see it as fair to pretend to be in love with someone when you aren't anymore. There were too many arguments, even though she liked to pretend our relationship was perfect. The final straw was getting into a argument and her not respecting my right to have some space, and how offensive she was about my family. I then realised I didn't even like her anymore, let alone love her. Her actions over the previous week to that argument had been manipulative and immature. She tried to pressure me into sex, embarrassed me at a party in front of a friend and got incredibly angry with me over small things. All in all she was just an extremely difficult person to deal with. Im really glad I ended it. I now have more time to focus on myself and what I want to do, and that makes me happier. Mentally I'm in a much better place, I feel balanced, and I'm looking forward to the future. Ultimately I had to end it. She said she never would so I knew that I would always have to be the bad person if the relationship ended. But she can have her opinion of me, I know I made the right decision. And I'm proud of myself for realising my own worth ... I am worth much more than what that relationship was.

My Europe trip was definitely significant and lifechanging. I learnt a bunch of lessons including that age is not important in friends or measuring success, flirting is fun and feels nice, I am privileged to know English as a first language, and Melbourne does not always need to be my home.

I had my third brush with work-related long-distance international travel, to Madrid. For starters, I tend to be an anxious flyer, so conquering some of that fear (which I seem to have to keep doing) was heartening. The conference I went to was very worthwhile, and I am glad I went. I had a hard time enjoying Spain, however. The food was delectable, I will say that. But... it all felt like giving my custom to another rich country, former colonizers and conquerors. I found myself irked by the largely unexamined, unreflective presentation of Spanish history in the cathedral I visited with colleagues, in particular. The Prado was an improvement over that, a little. I think I most enjoyed the everyday things — the charmingly tiny and very European hotel room, walking to and from the conference venue, checking out shops and grocery stores. At close range, my disconfiture with the country’s history evaporated in favor of the present moment. I suppose that’s the lesson I can take away, for good or ill.

In July, my husband had emergency gall bladder surgery. He's been sick for a very long time but no one could figure out with what. The night he went into the hospital was a horrible experience, and it wasn't until 36 hrs later that he had the surgery. At the time I was just numb. I had to figure out how to deal with the kids, call his work, inform everyone that needed to know, make medical decisions for him because he was too out of it to understand, and obviously just be there to take care of him. It was only later that I was able to process my feelings. I think that this trial really made me more grateful for my family. Especially my husband. And how much he does for us everyday. Things weren't great before this and it kind of reminders me how much I loved him and our family and how much they all meant to me. I was scared and sad, but also hopeful, grateful, and happy. I never want to go through that again but I think my eyes were ready opened after that.

Over the course of the year, I had two life-changing experiences. I got engaged (my wedding is in a month!!) and I converted to Judaism! Both of these experiences have enriched my life, given me new wells of strength and courage, something to fight for and cling to. I feel more awakened and alive and grateful. There is a sense of rightness to my life that I was missing before, and now I feel more complete.

Decided to have My ex buy me out of the house. The kids get to stay there part time. Feels like it’s my house, but I’m ready to move on. Relieved. Looking forward to being free.

Having TrialCard sell and give me the financial freedom to leave being an employee to go out and start an entrepreneurial venture. It was an amazing relief to not HAVE to have a job and give this new venture the opportunity to take off. I’m still learning how to balance the freedom of weekday/workday and weekend time. I want to do a better job on setting up the schedule and boundaries to make my schedule work for my goals. I also want to do a better job of scheduling my own goals with dedicated time. The new venture I’m taking on has me inspired to solve a great need with a solid opportunity for a big financial exit. I’m confident that we can get there but we’re both going to need to take on functional roles and get out of our own comfort zone.

I turned 50 and threw a party for myself. I bought out a bar, invited over 100 people, a photographer and a Photo Booth. About 100 people came and I was thrilled. In the past, I've been ambivalent at best about my birthday. Sometimes I've been too pensive about where I am and what I've got, etc. But this year, I celebrated myself with people who make me very happy. I also dated someone for 4 months. It went well for a while and then went south. I learned a lot about myself, what I want and what I need, and how to ask for it. And I learned that I have strong boundaries and that bullying won't work on me. And recently, after one date with someone else (yesterday in fact), I learned that I also have fear about giving myself to a new relationship. I am frightened of letting myself love another only to be hurt again. It took 11 years to lose my last long relationship and the pain was excruciating. However, I have learned more about myself after the fact and ever since than I ever knew possible. Nonetheless, I'd like to investigate this fear more and let it dissipate so I may find and give love, which is what I'd really like. I also recently worked on set for a short film and I learned a lot about myself. I worked hard in preparation for the film, gathering props, contributing costumes, helping with the story and script. I am a contributor. I bring infectious joy to my world. I can find joy in most everything I do. Dancing in front of the fan as it blew the laundry line was me finding joy in the simplest of ways, but it had me realize that I can be me in any circumstance, find joy, be playful, and perhaps inspire others to do the same just by being the best, simplest me I can.

Wow i can’t believe that it has been a year. Hello Hava 2019 holy shit you have graduated high school. And hey Hava 2017 you were still a junior. Life is moving crazy fast. At this point in my life, I’m a few days into senior year. This past year has been incredible, and I’ve pushed myself to appreciate and grow and learn more. I feel like a baby, but more like a baby adult than a kid anymore, which is wierd. Turning 17 was wierd for me and just writing this and knowing I’ll look back on it in a year and feel some distance from this moment is wierd. This past year started off with fall dinners and homework with jasmine, then dropping her off at the bus to go home after laughing our asses off that afternoon. It began with smoking weed where my reaction was giggly and uncontrollable, and having tense sleepovers. After brockhampton things kinda went downhill, this year has been a recovery and growing from disconnecting with her. Ok moving on from jasmine, I’ve grown extremely close with Chiara and Sloane through Camp. Advanced acting was mainly good but there was drama and tensions, Zoë and i get along really well online but less so in person. This year I’ve climbed roofs and babysat a ton, snuck into winter ball and looked at colleges (LA with momma was amazing), got close with soph and el and then lost it again. The year was really good. Junior year god damn when did i get that old. My classes were really good i was blessed with Catherine Klem and amstud and ceramics and ESPAÑOL CINCO HONORES FAM! Excited for that for this year. Also got those style gains in big ways. Then summer came FUCK i LOVE SUMMER and this one was amazing. Showing off my boobs hehe. Bonding with finn (what happened with him and jasmine did they date for a while?) hanging out with Steven and Alaina and blayne was awesome. Then Camp!!! Osi was pretty awesome and tb was amazing, i love sloner and Chiara, the cukes and the sweet potatoes, and the spontaneous bitch nights. Honestly after camping with mal and Alaina and going to eastern wa with sloner and Chiara, and bshoot amazingness, settling into school has been rough but good. Life is good. Mainly I’m thinking abt how everything is changing and I’m growing and how i still haven’t had a sexual experience haven’t even had my first kiss. This year was me getting older in huge steps. But it’s okay, and I’m excited to see what’s gonna happen this upcoming year. I’m at this point in my life where i feel a lot like a teenager. Like I’m in the middle of growth and everything is happening. I don’t wanna waste my years that I’m still young in. Idk if i wanna do a gap year but i guess I’ll have that figured out by next year. I’m a super social and emotional person. I love being around people and exhaustion effects me immensely. Lol this reflection is all over the place but i gotta get it out for you next year. But also sometimes i think abt how i could die tmrw so i might as well embrace and enjoy the moment. This 10q thing is really cool. To answer the actual prompt, this year has been full of little significant experiences, and if i could choose one i would say the last week of Camp, and it left me a more teenage-like, ready to embrace things, and grateful for everything. Or at least i try to be. So after this huge essay of a response, just know that i love you and i guess i look up to you. You are hot and beautiful and amazing and i pray to god that u have kissed someone by now pls. Anyway i love you. See you next year. Enjoy reading these. Hava❤️

Grams died. I feel isolated by it, I wish the family would talk more about it. Right before she died I told her I would take care of Cara, and I do not think I've lived up to that.

The last year has been my year of surgeries. Turning 50 and facing the fact that health is actually something I cannot take for granted. And the choices I make have a real effect on the outcomes and likely my future quality of living. I've worked on losing weight and other things to try and address issues like insulin resistance. I'm relieved to have caught heart issues and that my back surgery went well. And concerned now about making and sticking with healthy changes.

I lost my job, that I had been at for nearly 22 years. I guess shock would be the most accurate way it affected me. It did help me focus more on what I was doing.

I went part-time at my job on Jan 1st to pursue my passions. On sept 1st I decided to pick up another day at my “real” job because the extra hours will qualify me for more affordable health insurance. I have mixed feelings because I don’t “want” to work more hours but the benefits seem like a no-brainer one extra day a week saves me $350 in healthcare costs (not to mention I’ll earn more by working more hours) and gain dental benefits. I’m incredibly grateful to work for a company that is so flexible so I can pursue my own passions but a little afraid I’ll feel trapped in the grind like I did not so long ago. I said I wouldn’t go back for more money, my freedom and happiness were more important, but it seems like health insurance is roping me back in. I feel conflicted and not sure if it’s right. My best hope is that I’ll ease back into a routine and barely notice the blip in my schedule but I fear I dread the work week again. Only time will tell.

I finally surrendered to my disease of alcoholism. We found out that we will have need IVF to conceive a child. Both events affected me greatly both negatively and positively. I am all of those things. Grateful for my sobriety and AA fellowship. Relieved I am healthy and my husband supported me. I am resentful of our infertility issues. Lastly, I am inspired by my perseverance, faith and relationship with God, my husband and our future children.

I feel like there is going to be a time when my answer to this question isn't "i moved" but uh...today is not that day. I've been in Boston just under 3 weeks, and I am already so much happier then I was in California. I feel relieved. To be back on the East Coast and back in the Jewish community, and back in a place that doesn't feel haunted by that stupid temple job. This feels fresh and new and exciting.

Larry died. Very sad still. And fearful and more aware about death than I’ve been in a long time. I generally feel joy but I’m still struggling to believe he is actually gone. New Year’s Eve is going to be a wide range of emotions that I can’t even imagine right now. I will continue to get closer and closer and closer to my family, which added Mila woohoo :-)

I went through some health anxiety stuff--the intense fear about my breast symptoms-turned-into-breast lesions and a benign biopsy result that alleviated but didn't erase anxiety, plus an ACL tear at the same time. It was a lot to go through and took up a ton of mental space--the ACL plus more generalized anxiety still is taking up a ton of space. I think I'm learning things from this, and I'm more aware that I have a bunch of coping mechanisms, but SHIT anxiety is tiring, and I'm mostly frustrated and tired and sad. Though I'm also relieved that the breast worries turned out, at least so far, to be nothing. I felt another mild burst of fear at learning that I'll have to have another ultrasound in six months--it's routine for anyone who gets a biopsy--because I'm also afraid of what they'll see there, even though there's no reason to fear and probably that will actually provide peace of mind this time, but it's like when I was a kid and afraid to go to the doctor for a check-up. I wish I didn't feel this way; it makes life a lot harder and it seems not mandatory to feel this way even though maybe it's a health issue just like any other chronic health issue.

I moved across the country with my husband and children in order to be closer to my aging parents. I thought I was coming to help, but it created a lot of damage to my nuclear family. We moved here on Erev Rosh Hashanah last year. Now we have bought our own home and moved into our own space. I feel blessed to have such a caring husband who uprooted himself and fixed up this new home for our family. Tomorrow we are hosting 21 relatives for dinner - something we could never do in Wisconsin.

Man, oh man. Where to start? Graduating from university was a pretty big deal, and so was starting my current web and app development course. I'm enjoying it so much so far! I want to find a job in this industry and learn more programming in the future. Violet and I broke up in January. I decided I wanted to try being with guys so I dated one called Norman for a couple months. We broke up too and now I'm with Adam. I'm pretty crazy about him and I'm excited to see where this goes.

This past year my significant experience was likely Costa Rica. The 2 weeks I spent in cr was great for my well being and professional growth. I’m still incredibly grateful for the experience and also the group of quality humans I have been able to interact with and learn from. It was another awakening for the next phase of my life. It was essential for my personal healing. It brought to a place where I continued to ask questions, but it made me feel more comfortable with working through and living the questions. It’s always inspiring to share time with those people and have an experience like that. It’s truly one of a kind, there’s nothing I can compare it to. I think it’s challenging to do what we do. It’s tough to make a living and be successful financially, but it’s impressive to see how many people care for others, and continue to push the boundaries to make this earth a better place. Love is probably the answer, along with quality intentions and relentless effort.

One of my best friends passed away unexpectedly. I am devestated but I have a renewed sense of urgency that I need to enjoy every day that I am blessed with. Don't wait for tomorrow to follow your dreams.

the biggest and most significant experience of my past year was divorcing my partner of 17 years. somehow, i hadn't realized how trapped i was in that relationship, and yet the second it ended, i saw it all so clearly. this year has been the best of my life. i experience deep relief, happiness, appreciation for life, and a resounding love for myself every day in ways i never knew possible. most of all, i feel so grateful for having had the courage to free myself.

I got married! Very grateful, very relieved, very inspired, and incredibly happy.

In the last year I've been challenged incredibly by work. Going through a transitional period of taking over the social media department at Imagination has been one of the biggest career milestones so far. It has helped me grow as a person, but is challenging me daily. I'm grateful for the experience, but it is a stressful position to be in at times. I am hopeful that challenges make us feel more rewarded and can help us grow.

The most significant experience that has happened this past year; was most definitely rebuilding my connection with jewdaism and creating a bond with my future wife bringing her into the experience and her conversion to Judaism.

A significant experience from this past year was teaching at Brighton. I will never forget this year of my life, nor will I ever forget the defeating stress, anxiety, and toll the job took on me, but I will also never forget the amount of knowledge, confidence, and love for teaching / working with kids, especially urban kids, I took out of the year.

I moved! Colorado to Wisconsin. It’s helping me meet some goals and also making me reevaluate others. It’s been ups and downs, but I’m excited for what the future brings!

Quitting my job last fall shattered my world. I questioned everything about the identity I built up over the past decade. From November to August I was incredibly depressed and anxious. I contacted a suicide hotline a couple times. I cut myself off from so many people I love. I leaned heavily on my partner and learned just how resilient and compassionate he is. Quitting teaching only to return to it was transformative. I’m still unraveling the lessons I learned in the darkness I endured these past 10 months. I don’t know how I really feel about that decision and what transpired after it yet. But I do know that I feel an immense sense of gratitude for making it out on the other side.

In the past year my health has been in the forefront of my mind. I’ve had surgery twice and now have an injury that may require another surgery. Kind of unbelievable. Feeling extremely resentful and angry. And hopeless. And sad. And still wanting to try to get better. And anxious. And like life just isn’t fair.

I have to say me and Asaf moving in together and deepening our relationship. (although I finished my masters just a week ago, it was very anti-climactic). We are really moving forward (talking about marriage, like I predicted last year!). Lately we've been getting along SO well. It feels like we've turned the page and are starting to really get each other. It feels amazing. We are also talking more honestly and realistically about moving to the states. I have mixed feelings about this.

Coming to terms with ageing - more wisdom; yet less time to be wiser. The physical - loose skin; yet more genuine smile. Coming to terms with the ache of lost love. Loneliness is real.

My mother past away. I feel a bit free to let go of my hatred towards her. I was able to release some resentment for her. I’m thankful for the life she gave him. Because I don’t want to be her. I don’t want my kid to feel responsible for my mistakes.

I finally moved out of Alex's house. It was absolutely necessary, and possibly even a bit belated, but I did it, and no one died. I need to not lose track of the significance of this change amid all the other things I'm trying to do right now.

Dad died on April 17. In some ways I’m relieved for him - he’s now out of pain. And it was a really shitty last couple of years for him, being grounded and not able to travel, which is what he loved best in the world. But I’m a bit bereft - I miss him dreadfully, which I didn’t expect to do. Every time the home home rings, I still expect it to be him; every time there’s a new series starting in the UK, I have to remind myself that I don’t have to throw it on a thumb drive for him. I think, I hope, that he’s happier and I like to think of him climbing an airbridge or standing on the deck of a frigate and heading off on another adventure. But I suspect that’s just to make me feel better. I’m pretty sure that there’s nothing out there...

Brenna just started kingergarten. I’m a mess of pride, fear, anxiety.... She’s always been “away”, but this is so different than childcare. She’s becoming this little person and I need to figure out what’s left of pre-mom me and what I evolve into alongside her.

The limitations of my health and age. In a way, grateful to have a perspective, a sense that time is important.

Getting hired at Chappelle in February to cover for a sick leave. First I read excited. Next I was scared and overwhelmed. I never felt completely happy with the job I was doing but I was so grateful for the job. I began to feel a party of the community. I was then hired full time as a sped teacher. I'm thrilled and more comfortable feeling out there way forward.

This year, I graduated college! I was sincerely surprised by how meaningful I found the pomp and circumstance, and it was especially lovely to share the whole experience with all of my close friends and family. Looking back, I am so grateful for all the connections I made during college, the support from my friends and family, and everything I learned.

My Mom recovered . It renewed my faith. extremely grateful, relieved, resentful of my self for not showing it daily with Mom. Inspired to trust in God with all my heart ....

I retired. Got tired of trying to work full time when my health has been so unstable. So, I gave in and left Bell. Completed almost 32 years of service and was never once recognized for my ability, creativity, ambition or passion...except for my 4 years working for Wayne Ford. I never looked back, and talking with Kristin, things have gone downhill since my departure. Actually, Bell has been disrespecting its’ employees for the past 5 years, But enough about the past. Right now, I am just trying to get myself grounded and find my groove again. We sold our house and we don’t miss the commute, the stairs, or the work required for its’ upkeep. Living in a very friendly condo with a gym and pool. Starting to get into shape, going back to spiritualism and meditation, and beginning a healthier diet. I know things this year will be positive! Still married to the most wonderful, brilliant man in the 🌎 💖❤️🎉😘😍

I moved to a new state to start a new job. I’m grateful for the opportunity. A little resentful that a job loss prompted the move. Hopeful that once the dust settles that it will be a blessing and pivotal life experience.

I went to Africa. I touched elephants and saw giraffes, cheetahs, zebras, lions and warthogs doing their things in their natural habitat. I saw the most amazing night sky ever. It made me realize how small my world had become, and how immense it actually is. It was incredibly inspiring. I want to travel so much more - not just as a tourist, but immerse myself in a place so different from here and learn about it and myself.

After being terminated without cause from a job i had for 8 years, I had to reevaluate my career and what role i wanted to play. at first i was very angry about the way in which the job ended, but in retrospect, i would never be where I am now writing this without that push to change. I am proud of myself for having remained so calm during this transition and now as things are starting to come together at my new office, i feel very excited for future.

My daughter died in March. I'm raising her almost 2 year old son. I'm devastated, depressed, stressed and tired. I'm also grateful and honored to be able to provide a safe place for this sweet baby. Many mixed and difficult feelings. Trying hard to get adjusted to the new normal.

The road trip I took this summer with Austin was so refreshing. Learning and exploring with the guy I love was sometimes intense, definitely unknown, and stressful at times, but at the end, I didn't want to come back home. It left me proud of planning the trip and proud of our relationship, and I'm excited to continue traveling with him for the rest of our lives.

We took care of my 2 and a half year old grandson for 24 days without the parents. It was a beautiful bonding experience and a lot of work; including following though with his potty training. Then we had the rest of the family with us for another 2 weeks. In spite of the work and things being hectic and more crowded than we are used to; I felt grateful that they wanted to be with us. Inspired that we could all be together with no catastrophic dramas. But yes, it was bittersweet when they all left; relieved to have our home and life back, and sad to see them leave.

I got offered a great job and as a consequence decided to stay in China for the long term. This is a complete turnaround in my life, so I sometimes jokingly call it my midlife crisis project (I'm 43). It is a huge challenge; the language, the visa situation, a new job. I'm working hard to make it work and I'm full of new energy, but the uncertainty around my visa situation is sometimes really nerve-racking. I started smoking again but I also took up yoga classes again. It's a tumultuous time but I haven't regretted my choice for one second. My life is in Yunnan, I'm in love with this corner of China.

In this last year I have had a bad break up. I have been really sad by it and have had some troubles coming to terms with everything. It’s been almost a year since the break up but I still find myself thinking about him often and wondering what could have been. After finding out that he was seeing someone on the side and that they are now engaged, at first I was mad, I wanted to get revenge, now I’m sad. I wish it was me but I realize that it is for the best and that he and I were not meant to be. Right now I’m in between stages of being grateful that he left when he did before it got more serious than it was and depressed that I lost out on what could have been.

I recently had the chance to review last years answers and it now inspires me to supply the answer to this first question. One of my wishes for this past year was my desire to achieve financial freedom in my life. I knew that as a paycheck to paycheck family that my challenging monthly budgetary struggles, was to be presented with a additional burden with student loans repayments now due. The Significant experience that occurred since writing my wish list was that after many years of cutbacks, lies and greed at the NYT, Newsday & their various publications have supplied a financial windfall to our "declining newspaper" earning power. I am overwhelmingly GRATEFUL to be earning now "off the charts "paychecks, that have more than adequately relieved my concerns for all of my families financial burdens, old and new. The affect however presents a strange new challenge to discover answers for. The new 60-80 hour workweeks strain both my physical & mental limitations, striking a new balance between my work demands, family time & taking care of my body and mental health proves that their are always challenges to tackle. I rest assured that with focused hard work, along with my abilities to seek answers, I will find that balance in the near future.

I left a job that I did for over 19 years because I had lost respect for the childish manager in charge. It was in leaving that I learned the impact I had over the student workers I hired & developed. They reached out to me en mass to say how much I meant to them. THAT made my leaving harder than I ever imagined.

Divorced It has allowed me to grow and become a better parent. Also allowed me to have new experiences in life. I am grateful to be alive everyday

I fell down the stairs at work and I'm very blessed. Nothing broken, nothing sprained...I am ok. I am inspired and my faith is renewed. This was only God.... I am humbled by the experience and grateful to my heavenly Father for the blessings He is and has bestowed upon me!!! Thank you Lord!

A significant experience was going on a 10-day cruise with a friend. It was great to be away and relax, although I did get anxious here and there. Then I dropped my phone at the airport returning home and it broke. That was no fun.

One of the most significant things from this past year was the Roommate Disaster. In a nutshell, B and E were opposite personalities: B was reckless and wild, whereas E was tightly strung and easily stressed. E was also dealing with her mental health struggles, which manifested in a way that made it difficult for her to communicate with us. It came to head with our cat. She didn't want the cat, but didn't tell us that. Instead, she projected her anxieties onto a hypothetical reaction that we would have, and told her dad that we were bullies. He sent us an email entitled "The Harassment of E," and threatened to go to the dean with his allegation. Things died down fairly quickly after that, but it completely destabilized our relationships within the apartment. The trust was completely gone. Any sense of camaraderie was shot. It really affected how I felt throughout the year. My apartment never really felt like my home, and I treated it as such. I wish I took better care of my possessions. I wish I was closer with B and El. It was stressful to go through at the time. Being called a bully felt really hurtful, because that's so antithetical to the type of person I try to be. It also made me grateful for friends like L, who supported me and affirmed that I'm a good person. I also felt closer to my family, because they were incredible in giving me their time and advice.

Left our home in Shanghai and Moved to SINGAPORE. I’ve felt all of the above. Now I feel accepting of the situation and generally grateful. Most recently I actively support others who are in transition: invite them to our home, etc. Being a support makes me feel stronger and brings more interesting new folks into my life.

I got married this year and it changed my whole sense of the world. It made me feel more deeply settled in myself. It made me feel secure in the world and it made me see that love does really heal old wounds. My wife is truly magic. Our love is magic. We can fight like every other couple, but it is the resolution of our struggle that brings us closer together. It teaches me to enter conflict with a commitment to honesty rather than fear of chaos. Our love has made me feel like I have everything I need in the world just as it is right now. I've never really felt that before. I've said it plenty, but never knew I didn't mean it.

I started a new job as a dementia specialist, memory care coordinator, etc. It has been an interesting year helping families with their journey through he world of dementia. There are times when I wonder why I still want to be a part of the world of dementia, especially since it took the love of my life, but I just keep feeling that I need to do it for all of those other people traveling this course.

I was fired for no cause and I still don't know what was said. I lost my family because they want me to accept my abuser. These events made me suicidal and I began injuring myself again. It had been a really long time since I've done that. I became closer to G_d and he gave me a wonderful gift, Janet. She saved my life.

Our second daughter Ardith was born! It has definitely changed our family. Mostly for the better! She's a very mellow and easygoing baby. We've had a few health concerns with her which have led to sleepless nights (beyond the usual sleepless nights a newborn brings!) but all in all she's a beautiful, positive force in our lives. It's been wonderful seeing our older daughter grow into her role as a big sister. We are all more tired, but more full of love, with Ardith in our lives.

I lost my mother. I've had to learn to exist in a world without my soul mate. I've learned I'm stronger than I ever imagined. I learned what loss is really like. I'm empty without her and full with her love. I'm figuring out how to function without her. I'm broken.

My brother Steven died in the past year. He was 40 and suffered pancreatic cancer. We was gone in a matter of months. This was my wife's only brother. They were close. We were close. It was devastating. And it touched off a entire chain of events that have effected my relationship and caused a crisis of confidence that I don't ever remember having previously. It started the questioning of my relationship with Beth. Questioning the foundation. Questioning whether I can continue to ignore the problems I see with my desire to stay. And it has brought us to a place where we are "excavating" all the little veins of our past. We are currently in the process of putting it all back together. Rebuilding. Emotionally exhausted. I am reading meaning into every action and reaction. She is walking on egg shells, waiting for me to point out the next thing she has done wrong. Along for the ride has been Beth starting a relationship with Michelle. Which came with bad timing and proceeded before we were ready. But it is starting, fledgling. Threatening. Undermining everything. Sparking new conversations daily. It all comes with thoughts that Beth will fall in love and move on. That our sex life isn't good enough. That I am not enough. But the real threat isn't the sex at all but the fact that Beth starts out a new relationship, already in love and attracted and with chemistry with the person. That she may have the potential to Love her more then me. She promises that it can't happen. Yet Steve died. Anything can happen. To complicate all, Beth is currently pregnant. Its way too early to even believe it. But it is the fact of the day. We are doing everything to protect our little Poppy Seed. If all goes well we will have a different answer next year. I am tired and torn through all this. Even more in Love with Beth. But perplexed and lost on how to relate to her.

I had a D&C in June. It was my choice and it was a choice I knew was correct in making it. I was so happy when I first got pregnant. We found out on our first anniversary. I was so happy for 30 hours and then reality set in. I started having panic attacks. I wondered what would happen to us. I had a major career change and was under a ton of pressure at work. I couldn't handle it. I felt so relieved after. I was rushing into the appointment because I didn't want to be late. I didn't want to miss my window to end it. I turned back to my husband who never has any sense of urgency and yelled "I just want this all to be over. I just want life to go back to normal" and since that it hasn't been normal. I felt so relieved when it was over. I felt almost like me again. Aside from the vomiting and pain and constant bleeding. I resented my IUD for failing me. I resented my body for lying to me. I resented the doctors who for years told me it wouldn't happen without intervention. And then I felt like a failure. Because it wasn't supposed to happen without intervention and it did. It just happened. And I stopped it because I wasn't ready and I didn't want it. I was under extreme pressure at work, I was so sick I could barely take care of myself. My mental health was deteriorating for the seven weeks we knew at such a rapid state my husband was afraid to leave me alone. And then the pregnancy was gone and I was better. But I didn't always feel better. I felt like I had quit, like I had given up. Now I have a different IUD and it's like I'm being punished. I have terrible acne, my weight is all over the place. The D&C was oddly empowering, it felt like putting my pro-choice money where my mouth is. but I'm sad about what could have been. I think that I would have gotten over everything that was happening. But you have such a short window to do anything, I needed to take care of myself first. What if I had gone through with the thoughts I was having? What if I hated the thing that had changed my life? Going through with the pregnancy wouldn't have made me a better person. I needed to put my own oxygen mask on. And that's what it taught me -- that sometimes I need to take care of myself first and know that while I can't go back it's all going to be ok.

Since last holiday season, I've officially had my name and gender marker changed. Though the legal proceedings were, indeed, monumental, the process of recovering my true and authentic itself was transformative. It opened me up to exploring the other aspects of myself that have been hidden and unexpressed for a plethora of reasons. For that, yes I am grateful. And the relief of unburdening myself from the stranglehold of doubt insofar as my gender is concerned was profound. Yet as I proceed along this path of integration, I've found myself wrestling with coming to terms with my story in other ways, namely that of abuse. Uncovering myself has left me proceeding along a path of revisiting and attempting to feel, own, and express my story of trauma and abuse, which has been painful and triggering. Revealing to myself and the world my true identity as a mostly masculine genderqueer person has been hard work, yes, but I was able to extend myself grace and compassion along with way. The deep-seated blame and pain that comes with unpacking my abuse, though, has not been as amenable to that grace and compassion.

I gathered up all of my belongimgs, moved back to the US from Mexico with no plan, no money, no "home" to go back to, and totally hopeless, to be made even worse by breaking up with Oscar about 3 weeks later. It hurts so much, despite being the correct decision because it's just a reminder of all of the failures in my life, how I continually risk everything good in my life for different men who give me no real commitment or stability, and I spend my life in constant anxiety knowing that this isnt the way my life is supposed to be but I dont know how to get myself out of it. It was also a sad reminder of how truly alone I feel in the world. I have no support system. My boyfriend's family was kinder to e than my own, and supported and helped me even though they didnt have to. They accepted me in a way my own family never will. It's also a harsh wakeup call to how I constantly feel like I am being abandoned or left behind. If relationships, in my "career" options or lack there of, in my finances, in DANCING omg in dancing. And it kills me. I had more suicidal days this year than I have ever felt since I was 13. So many days of going minute by minute trying to convince myself that there had to be something worth living for. That dying was the wrong choice...even though ever fiber of my body was saying "do it". But I also learned who my true friends are. A small handful.of people have picked me up when I was at the brink of suicide, homelessness, and just utter despair. Without these people I would 100% without a doubt be dead. There is no question in my mind. Oscar. Tiffany. Julianna. Diane. Yvonne. Harvey. You are the people who have saved me from myself. You cared even though you didnt have to, and when the world would have just as contently seen me in the street, homeless, or even dead. So thank you. I struggle to this very moment with knowing how to not only keep myself from the suicidal thoughts that plague my mind, but also in how to move forward to live the meaningful life my soul has been longing for. To serve a purpose. To make an actual difference. I cry for the reality of having to split from my partner, from realizing that my biological family would just as soon prefer I die so they dont have to hear about my depression any more, from feeling like I have no place.in this world. I am so tired of crying and struggling. Dear God please help me. This has been the hardest year of my life. Please help me to never repeat these mistakes and lessons again. Thank you.

During the my spring semester earlier this year taught me a lot. I was taking 5 classes, all to which had a plethora of homework each day. A literature class that had readings and quizzes due every class day, and these were no light readings, then the quizzes would ask the most asinine questions and even if I aced all the quizzes, if I was at the bottom ranking of the class I would be failing. I also had a humanities class, which had insane readings sometimes having more than 60 pages and then we had to summarize it and I'm not sure what I did wrong but my professor always said my summery was wrong, despite it being tailored to his exact specifications. I had an English composition class where the teacher showed obvious favoritism. She would yell and scream at us when ever we didn't know how to do something, which caused us to ask questions about our 10 page research papers. Then a government class that had exams with questions that had nothing we went over in class. My 2018 spring semester was hell. I was failing my classes... all of them. Sometime in early April I had the biggest mental break down in my life, so much that I actually called my parents at 3am telling them I didn't want to come back for the following year. This caused a riff between my father and I that we didn't talk for weeks on end and only increased my stress more than it already was. Im not sure how I did it, but later in the semester my grades started going up. My grades weren't what I was hoping for, but I managed to pass all of them, with the exception of my humanities class. Im grateful and relieved it's over. I resent that semester and the professors that made my life hell on Earth. But I have drawn inspiration from the spring semester from hell.

I interned at a place that will soon be my full time job after college. Eaton Corporation!!! I was very stressed all summer because I felt as though I was constantly going through my day not actually accomplishing much. I still feel this way at school and worry about my work ethic/abilities. I did - for once in my life - feel like I learned something completely new.

I went to Europe in June/July this year, and September last year (but in the same Jewish year). The first trip was really special. It reminded me how I am independent and don't need someone to feel happiness. It inspired me to be better, more focused and really take advantage of the comfortable situation I'm in. The most recent trip was with my partner, who I met two weeks into the trip. This was fine, but I felt like I was waiting around for him and this created a teency bit of resentment because I felt I was there for him more than for myself and in my own time, I was kind of lost. Until I met up with him of course, and it became a great trip. I was grateful for the trip and, overall, do not regret it as now I know we can travel together and we have fun being together 24/7. I felt relieved to be coming home. And the first half of my trip made me realise - yet again - that if I'm uncertain about something, I really need to picture myself in that situation as consider whether I'll be happy or not. I need to put my wants first, especially when lots of money is involved. But no regrets. Maybe just a few sad moments at the time.

There are a few to choose from that are work-related, personal-related, and health-related. The health one though impacts everything. I no longer see myself as someone with a major illness. All of the work with Lener has paid off. Between the sprained neck, braces being put back on, weight gain, and sesamoiditis, it feels good to be mentally healthy. Through it all I have remained strong and stable, not letting all the other health stuff and work stuff bring me down. I can feel where in the past something would have sent me into a tailspin but now I am doing okay, thining healthily through it.

I’ve witnessed two close friends (Kristin and Brad) from two opposite places in my life get married on two separate occasions this year. Both were two beautiful unions and completely overwhelmed me with love. Both times I shared the experience with friends new and old. There is love in this world. Also reminds me of all of the amazing people I’ve been so lucky to have made friends with over the years.

So many significant experiences! But I have to say traveling to Patagonia on our honeymoon was a very significant experience. It was inspiring and majestic with abundant beauty in so many ways. Grateful to be able to see such beauty and be humbled by the beauty of this world. It was a trek to get to southern Patagonia but I am so grateful I was able to see it, smell it, feel the beauty of nature in all its elements. A trip I will never forget and sparked the desire to explore more.

Right after the chagim last year I began working at the JCC. Everything fell into place after that. I had a social life, I was happy, my good work was recognized, I got back into dating, and I fell in love. Another majorly significant event that happened is that we went to Morocco! It was so amazing to get to see where my mom grew up. While I've always felt attached to my mom's culture, it never felt MOROCCAN. This trip was so affirming in so many ways, specifically with food, and I have never felt more Moroccan in my life. I'm so grateful for that opportunity.

This past summer I went on usy on wheels. It changed my life for the better. I met people who I now consider family, I learned how to overcome anything that life throws at me, and I learned what it means to be Jewish in all sorts of settings. I felt a part of a community when I was with these people and my outlook on life has changed. I now know how to focus on the positive and how to be a force of change in the world.

I lost my I thought was my best friend due to neglect on her part. It really hurt my feelings. I realized that she was more important to me than I to her even though in hind sight, I've known this all along.

I went to DragonCon I went to katsucon I went to gencon I enjoyed them all, but dragon Con twas too big perhaps? And too social and party. I preferred gencon. I broke up with two partners, one of which I thought was going to lead to marriage. I was frustrated and disappointed, but I think I am over it now. I evolved two of my relationships. One friend with benefits became a primary to our surprise. One became a secondary. There was a being dumped and getting back together with the primary which really pushed us to better define what we wanted and what we were. I moved to Nova. It is lovely but it isn't where family is, and my primary isn't here. I sold my house in Blacksburg. It was bittersweet even though that was the plan from the start. I have lost my friends from Blacksburg mostly which makes me sad. I started the process of moving to Canada as a permanent resident. Francis is dying. My sister is falling apart. I closed my tea company I started working for Geico I left my job at Rackspace I went to ghc for the first time. It was amazing to go-to a technology conference that was mostly women. It's where I got the job offer from GEICO. I was a speaker at an information security conference for the first (bsideslv) and second (the Diana initiative) time Had to put down Chester, he was so stoic. Slack's and he never did get along. He never did make it to Nova, probably for the best. Visited San Diego again, but this time ended up evolving the friendship I went for into a partner. Had a lovely vacation in la where friends became partners. Williamsburg, or was that last year? Having to move again. Everything is going in storage and I am going to Canada after a stay over in Philly. Had my first colonoscopy, they did find things, we did decided I didn't have hemerroids or diverticulitis. Purchased a new car, Subaru Forester. I hate car buying. I miss my Civic but needed the space and it will import into Canada easily. Finally got to stay at the library hotel in NYC. Finally got threader earrings. Hopefully I can keep my holes from closing. Had accupuncture for the first time. It has been helpful. Finally started having my wrist treated. Found out how much stress made me ill as many of my health issues, but not all, ended when iquit my job. I am... Unsure how I feel about the last year. I guess I am thankful it went as well as it did, even with the sad moments. I realized how accustomed to remote and flexible with I have become, and that it is no longer optional or a nice to have for me.

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had a double mastectomy and was pronounced cancer free. There is always a chance that it will come back but for now, she’s ok. I’m beyond grateful for her recovery and for her strength. I feel closer to her now. My grandma was then diagnosed with lymphoma, a type of blood cancer. She passed away this year and it’s still a heavy burden on me. I cry when I think of her and wish that I had called her more often. I feel some regret but I did still call her as much as I could and she was always happy to hear my voice. I was able to visit her when she was in hospice care and my mom was with her in her final moments. I believe my mom was saved so that she could take care of her mom.

I have my first girlfriend. I am grateful to have her in my life and have learned a lot about her and myself. I look forward to many more new experiences with her.

In December of 2017 I went on Birthright with students from Pitt and CMU. I left the states nervous and unsure of what would happen, but I returned with new friends and a greater sense of awareness about my Judaism and relationship to Israel. I still hang up the map of Israel I received on the trip. I'm grateful to have gone and will honor the gift by speaking out for or against Israel. For example, I did not support the Israeli law that limits the rights of non-Jews. I look forward to returning; hopefully, it won't be too far away.

I lost my mother, she passed away five months ago. It is both a great relief and a great sadness. She lived so long and had drawn out her life beyond anything I could imagine still wanting to be here for except the love of her family. I was able to be with her as she transitions and passed plan and that was a great gift that you gave to me to give to her., and for that I am so grateful. Is it still affecting me, very short time.

The first experience that stands out to me is Noah leaving. It must have happened right around this time of year. For months it had been so wonderful to be around him. I mean, it was weird and he was high half the time, but it also felt immensely good because he was kind to me and paid attention to me and really genuinely thought I was hot and found me attractive and I had no expectations. And he was beginning to get more and more tender with me. And then from one day to the next he became a person I didn't know. He was distant and strange and voluntarily homeless and then he took off for California in a broken van with a girlfriend that I never met. I felt really really sad. I cried so hard; I was actually sobbing, so loudly. I felt like he had died, like I had lost him. I wasn't betrayed by the fact that he had a girlfriend; I was betrayed by the fact that he had become a different person who didn't seem to want to know me at all, who I didn't recognize, who I couldn't reach. I was sad that he had finally fallen off the cliff that he had been on the edge of for years. I was sad that he had cut me so entirely out of his life, that I heard third hand that he had left the state, that he kept in touch with other friends but not with me. I was sad that I didn't count enough, or couldn't be trusted enough, or whatever it was. I was just plain sad and mad and hurt, too, and I wanted to scream at him but even more I wanted to hug him and then open my eyes and have him be the same person I remembered instead of a stranger.

Moved to London and had a spiritual awakening. It changed me totally and completely. I also got married. Finished my book. I am relieved. I am inspired beyond imaginable.

I just climbed to the summit of Mt. Whitney. It was an awesome event. Getting to the summit was the culmination of 9 months of dedicated training. I lost 33 lbs before the trip. I worked my ass off. I wasn't sure I would be able to make it up that mountain. Just 9 months ago, my ankle was iffy and I couldn't go more than 3-4 miles. And if I tried to walk on a rocky or sloping trail, my ankle would get bad quickly. But I set my mind to it and did the work. And not only did I summit Mt. Whitney, I was strong and capable enough to carry other people's weight and get the group to the summit. I'm really proud of myself. I worked so hard. I prioritized training and my health ahead of a lot of things–coaching sometimes, above my garden, above the house cleanliness. I made training non-negotiable and it really paid off. I'm in good shape now (155 lbs) and I am well-positioned to take on a fiercer training goal—my Olympic triathlon. It's really good to feel strong and in control again.

Being laid off from work the same week I really began accepting my ME/CFS diagnosis. It was a genuine mental shift that I hope will impact my life in a positive way as I begin to focus more on my health and less on how I think my life should look.

I gave birth to my daughter Suzanna. I felt so strong and awesome and powerful to go through the physical act of bringing a child into this world. I am totally amazed by what I was capable of to carry and deliver my child, by the joy I feel as Adam and I coparent, by the inspiring changes I see daily in my growing baby, and by the intense happiness that I see she brings to our families. I feel hope that there is new life and positive energy in the world. I am so grateful and relieved that my pregnancy and birthing experience and my daughter’s first 6 months of life were relatively easy, healthy, and safe overall. I am humbled by the experience and amazed by what I have shared with so many other parents across the world and across time. I appreciate the miracle of making and sustaining life as truly full of wonder in a whole new way ever since I became a parent.

I participated in my first 200hour yoga teacher training at liberation yoga. I'm still working out how it affected me. I am excited about the future and a bit resentful and frustrated because of how the training was run.

I took a major step in my career with a new job, for which I am not entirely ready. I feel grateful and happy that I have taken undeniable step forward and taken on major new responsibilities for the first time in years. I also am not sure if this is actually a job I want long-term and wondering if I have found myself in a "be careful what you wish for" situation. That said, it feels great to be out of the holding pattern I felt like I've been in for the previous 2.5 years. I'm hopeful I can learn a lot in this job and either figure out how to make it sustainable or to leverage it into one that is.

Honestly, the most significant experience has been my first year of teaching! Being able to connect with the students and see them get excited about new vocab words, literature, and history was so fulfilling. I can't wait to start back in on this year in 16 days! I have always been insecure: insecure about my intelligence, insecure about if people like me, insecure about my appearance... but with my students that all disappears. It was amazing at the end of the year having parents coming up and telling me that their kids wanted to read over the summer and how they would come home and tell them history stories from my class.

My friend introduced me to an online class. I am not only grateful, but I am also inspired. I haven't felt this good about my life in a long, long time.

This year has had no shortage of significant experiences! The first one that comes to mind is the JRC trip to Montgomery. We visited the Legacy Museum and the National Memorial for Peace and Justice, both of which are incredible. And I had a wonderful time getting to know other JRC members outside of my immediate group of friends. I'm extremely grateful to have had this experience, and I'm inspired to continue to fighting for racial equity.

i moved to Denver! it's been a bit tougher than i thought. i've noticed more how i changed while i was in Austin and how i need to undo some of those things (not initiating as many social plans), and get back to my connecting ways! i'm grateful but still have a lot to work on!! including: developing patterns + routines with local friends, keeping up with distant friends, purge + organize my place, organize my finances. LOTS of change.

When I hurt my husband, Andrew while at the same time feeling resentful and mad at myself for letting our relationship get this far. Even when my guts was telling want I should be doing, which is taking care of myself first. I worry about others and their feelings. Making sure they were comfortable with me. I would adapt to their needs and setting mine aside. Seeking counseling and final deciding to get circumcised to become Jewish inspired me to finally find myself. To be true to myself. Counseling and getting the circumcision to become Jewish opened me up, exposed me to new possibilities. I guess as I think about it more...Getting accepted into graduate school really relieved me from my doubts of getting something on my own. Getting circumcised was a decision I made on my own. Allowing someone like a psychologist to expose me and let me see my faults was done on my own. Long story short...I love my husband and now know he wants me regardless of my faults. He holds me up and feels inspired by me but in his special way. He truly loves me. He doesn't want to disappointment me and wants me to be happy.

I got a job in Dallas, TX which is a city I never considered living in. It affected me in many ways, taking me to a new place and one where I did not know people or have a community to help me settle in. I am grateful because of the experiences and learning opportunities I’ve had in this job. I am slightly resentful for being somewhere I truly had no desire to be but I’ve been inspired by the Jewish community here and the people here who want to change the perception of Texas.

I had a seizure and passed out in Dollar Tree. An ambulance was called and the paramedics called one of my students who was the first in my phone book. She called my friend Amy who was a mile away and came to check on me. I did not recognize her and did not regain consciousness until I was in the ambulance. Amy called my sister and my parents. This happened on the day of my great aunt's death so my extended family was in town too. I was in the hospital for a few hours while they ran tests. I later had to go in for a follow up. All tests came back positive. Now I can't drive for 6 months and I have no idea why this happened to me. I owe $6000 for my insurance deductible. I'm pretty angry about that because I'm constantly trying to get out of debt and so far the heat in my house went out, my transmission went out, and now this. I have no idea what caused this seizure and no idea why God has allowed it to happen but I delare that I am happy and healthy and whole. I am debt free in Jesus' name. And all things work together for my good. He has given me a future and a hope.

A falling out with a favorite friend has left me feeling jilted and unlikeable; sure that while I can be charming in the short term, I am ultimately unloveable by anyone who's not legally obligated to love me.

I took the kids camping. Good to know we can rough it; good to know we can get on with other families for a whole weekend! Inspired towards further holidays-with-friends - indeed, more spending time with friends full stop.

My fundraiser, "Sense: A Silent Auction to Benefit Multiple Sclerosis". I learned a lot from organizing the event and am impressed, grateful and humbled by how it turned out. The amount of people that attended and/or donated still excites me!

My mom died. Its really shown the cracks in the family, and how little I have in common with those who remain. My mom said "its taken me a while to get here, but as long as you are happy" and it really meant the world. I just wish the rest of my family would see the same light

I received a promotion in April. It came at a time where I was bored with what I was doing and lacking motivation. Since then, it has challenged me in every way. I've had the opportunity to create a strategy for a new system, I've begun managing a team, and analyzing my work at a higher level. However, I have also felt overwhelmed nearly every day since spring. I never leave work feeling my workload is managed and feel like everyone is waiting on me for something. I struggle to come to terms with the fact as a manager, my to do list is never done.

The most significant was probably my Dad'd dying; given his decline, perhaps it was for the best. I am still very grateful to have reconnected with him and to have shared his last two years or more. Amazingly, I got the lead in the next musical as well, and again cherished the experience. It was a challenge yet again, but I felt up to it and did a fine job, making me proud. Karen auditioned for neither the musical or the following play to focus on her art career and it is working out well. Solo shows, including one at a museum! Her work is evolving, she is energized about her work, and I couldn't be more proud!

The biggest thing that happened in the last year was my breaking my arm (24 October 2017) and the subsequent surgery (02 November 2017). It has colored nearly everything that’s happened over the last 10 months. It derailed a fitness routine and threw up tons of hurdles for work. (Not being able to type is a pretty big productivity drain.) I definitely feel resentful. Angry. Cheated. It’s unfair. And of course it’s nothing compared to many other people’s problems. But man. I was doing pretty well right then, and everything positive came to a screeching halt.

This year, my mum had to fight cancer, my granddad died suddenly, and my sister called jer wedding off a week before it, while already pregnant. All of these event led me to a big depression wave, and it affected my University results. I am relieved it's over, but it helped me understanding, once again, my priorities, and it made the bonds with my family even stronger. I really hope I won't have to cope with so much all at once, again in my life.

Last August, I was lucky enough to see at total solar eclipse in Thermopolis Wyoming. There were no rooms available, and a very kind 82 year old woman, Lois Merritt, let me pitch my tent next to her goats. We saw the eclipse together, and shared so much. This Spring, I was eating dinner under the stars in Berkeley when I felt a presence that set my hair on end. Two days later, Lois' daughter called me to say Lois had died. I think I felt Lois passing through. I'm a lucky gal.

my youngest child (daughter) got married and on the assumption that she is happy, content and in love with her husband (really lovely young man who adores her) i am very happy and comfortable with her changed status ... so far all seems good

I finished university and I found and started a job! This is big news and I've been waiting so long for this moment. Now I really feel as a grown up. It is not the perfect job but it is quite fun at times and I think it is quite good for a first job. I am learning a lot.

Diet change- I found that refined sugar was causing inflammation. When I stopped taking it my arthritic pains disappeared. It inspired me to eat healthy whole unprocessed food and I feel 10 years younger because of it.

I started EMDR therapy, and it has improved my life so much. It has helped me process how so much of what I struggle with is tied to a feeling of worthlessness that I got from being raised in Mormonism. I am finally learning that I am strong and capable and that I can trust myself to figure things out, and that I can live by my OWN values. This has given me such a greater sense of clarity and confidence as I leave my job for grad school. Sure, I might go broke and never get a pair acting gig. But I can deal with it, because I have proven to myself that I can do hard things.

I lost my beloved sweet father this year. I am grateful to have had him in my life for so long. I was relieved when he took his last breath because each breath seemed like such an enormous effort for him. Then I was filled with grief. Then relieved. It cycled like that for weeks. Now I mostly feel like he’s still with me, in my heart.

I start taking classes towards my bachelor's degree. It's scary, and it's hard in a way that I haven't really experienced, and I'm not really learning anything *new* per se, just refreshing my knowledge around the "basics", but it's also something that I should have done years ago. I am in my 40s, and I've been working in my professional field for 20 years, so I suppose it's time to actually get my college degree.

My experience was living apart from my family for a year, because of work. I was able to visit them 4 or 5 times. This event affected me deeply. It was good for my career. It made me mildly question my familial links. It made me love my family each day, consciously. It led to much loneliness. It led to bad behaviors. I am grateful only that it is over.

Deciding that running my own company wasn't working, and wasn't something I really wanted to be doing anymore. I wrestled with the idea for a long time, and it felt like a breakup but ultimately once I made the decision I was relieved.

Taos. Jumpsuit. Right after last year 10q, actually. Just like, realizing I could have that? and it could happen? and things do happen sometimes? And you can trust and lean forward and just believe in reality and real things? like something was broken open, sex wise. Idk. It was pretty cool

El día de mi cumpleaños de 30 navegamos al atardecer por el río lacantun en un kayak. Vimos guacamayas, garzas grises y muchas más aves fue hermoso! Y estoy agradecida por ese momento de salid paz y armonía en y con la naturaleza... Corrí mi primer maratón después de haberme planteado el objetivo hace muchos años y haber hecho todo lo posible para hacerlo este año. Con mucho esfuerzo personal lo logre...! Aprendí mucho del compromiso de cumplir objetivos de cuidarme y hacer algo de principio a fin! Espero q el año que viene pueda estar contando una historia hummuseria

I went to Point Reyes and had good food and saw beautiful places. I am grateful. At my hotel, I was interviewed by Genentech about Paul's experience with Avastin. I am grateful and I would like to see the article.

A significant experience I have had was taking a semester gap in the middle of my studies, to travel and work on projects that I was really passionate about outside of my living-country. It showed me that chasing what I crave is the essence of life. I now feel even more compete, because I was given the chance to discover new sides of myself. I truly feel inspired by my own self; which can really sound funny but it is a beautiful feeling.

Attending uni residential school - took time out to reflect and make important decisions. Found the time (and space) vital to improving my mental health. Inspired to undertake similar trips on an annual basis (at least)

Two major things happened to me in this last year: I came out of the closet to my family and best friends, and I experienced having a serious relationship with another man for 4 months which ultimately ended in a painful breakup. First: coming out. How did it affect me? I am more grateful and generally more happy than I ever thought I would be! My thoughts and experiences constantly remind me of the "split" between the time before and after I came out, and how my life is significantly better now. Having agency over my own life has changed more than just my ability to love freely. My confidence has changed. My mood is better. I am not angry all the time. I can talk freely with people about whatever intelligent topic I would like to talk about. I do things that I want to do. Now, when I decide that something does not interest me, I do not feel resentment for skipping it. These are all positive outcomes of me coming out as gay that I never imagined would happen. Second: the ups and downs of a relationship. I had a boyfriend! Who would have thought that it would take me 28 years to feel comfortable to date another man, but it was fantastic. I enjoyed having someone that genuinely cared about me and that wanted to hang out with me on different terms than my friends do. However, when I decided it was time to end that relationship, I have never felt that level of emotional distress before. How was I supposed to break up with him without ruining his life? I knew the relationship was never intended to last forever, but I never knew that ending it would be that hard. Now I am here, 5 months after the break up, and I am EMOTIONALLY DRAINED. I have avoided dating anyone seriously or getting myself into a relationship again because I am scared of how I will end it or hurt that person when it might end. I am hoping that this experience has taught me what I genuinely want in a partner and how I can learn to care for someone again.

I’ve been traveling on my one for a month. This experience made me grow. I expérience be there in peace and pleasure by myself. I lost time to décidée what to do. And thanks of that I’m much lighter and quicker with taking decisions. I’ve been coin and been ashame of that and I’ve learned to accepte it and be cool with it. I’m more in peace with my self thanks to this trip

Lots of change this year: - We moved in a bigger apartment, which is good - I lost my job, and found a new one; still so-so - We're expecting a child - YAY!!! All in all, a very filled and fulfilling year. Haven't seen the time fly.

The birth of my son has been the most significant and inspiring experience of my life so far. I am so grateful to have been given this gift and the opportunity to experience this miracle. Hearing him for the first time, seeing him react to his dad's voice. Looking into these beautiful eyes and seeing the universe in them... I feel my life has been filled with so much wonder and love. I can't even describe it! :)

My mother passed away very recently. I am working through my grief and mourning and spending a fair amount of time thinking about how this is similar and different from when my father died. The affect is not anger or resentment, nor is it inspired ... the only thought so far is how different my life is now than a few weeks ago.

Organizar un evento familiar para el que no tenía buena predisposición. Inicialmente me sentí agobiada, pero le dediqué esfuerzo y una vez ya pasado, sentí alivio y satisfacción

The firing of a colleague because his job had evolved. What about my loyalty? Would they do the same to me? Without any doubt. Realisation that in my life I need to be the captain on the ship and take the reign. I am going to be successful because I can and take charge! Do it! Now!

I have been able to spend an extended period in a beautiful place with a supportive group nearby and a cuddly cat. I am grateful

Moving to Switzerland from Sydney has been the most significant change in my life this year. It was the realisation of a life long dream to work for the UN and to live abroad for an extended period. It was enormously gratifying to finally achieve such a long held goal, and has made the last decade of university study, unpaid work and uncertainty at not having chosen a safe, corporate career seem worth it. I think it has made me feel a bit more settled in life generally, and also more confident in the idea of actually leaving law/human rights in order to pursue something completely different. I feel as though I have ticked off a burning ambition and can now be a bit more honest with myself about what it is that will actually make me happy and fulfilled. Maybe a career in the media, or maybe moving back to Australia and setting up a small business in a regional community. Living in Geneva and working at the UN has been less exciting and less enjoyable than I had anticipated. I don't like living here and I don't like working at the UN. That being said, I love living in Europe and have made the most of the beautiful summer we've had to travel extensively. I'm also starting French classes this week which will mean I have learnt a useful new skill to take with me in life. It has been hugely challenging but also a great adventure and I'm extremely grateful for all the life lessons learned, the personal development that has occurred and the friends I've made. I have gotten myself out of the rut I was in in 2017 and feel much more comfortable making bold decisions about what will come next.

The most significant experience I’ve had in the past year is learning how difficult it is to raise a 15 year old. Various incidents has led us down a path to counselors, therapy and many sleepless nights. With the help of a really good therapist for our son, we are hopeful.

I manifested both a generous redundancy and a new job last year. This pushed me out of my comfort zone and in amongst some seriously intelligent people, this has improved my confidence, my skill set and communicative skills, it has also generated some new relationships with people I enjoy working alongside. It has been challenging, and I am so grateful for it, when my previous job wrapped up I wanted to move into a new role after 19 years and this has happened to my relief. It’s incredible how generous the universe is when we allow to be.

I went to warrior wealth in June, I am very grateful for the experience, it put me on a bath to breaking out of the rat race and living a life where I am out generating my future for myself on my schedule. Doing this will enable me to be free to spend time with my family and less time working. It also opened the way to core4 and I've been living this way for the past few months, it has had an impact on who I am and my experience of myself.

Having to accept that I need a hip replacement has been very difficult for me. I continue to question whether it is the right thing to do even though it is just one week away. I am pissed off that my body did not heal itself.

Well, first off things went really crazy with the polyamory thing. I started dating a new guy and we got really serious and then my husband decided that he no longer wanted to be poly (after seven years of it) and that I had to break up with the new guy. Well in a nutshell, I refused to stop being poly and am now going through a divorce.

Once again I really can't pinpoint anything, tho that's mostly due to my memory not anything happening, really. I really really liked our nightly walks with Triin. That's all folks, there's nothing more to say than she got me off the couch (where I am now, typing this) and into Tallinn. Or more so, she got me noticing small everyday nice places there and for that I am eternally grateful

An experience that is currently happening is a reorganisation at my place of work. I have been uninspired for a year or more now and just ahve not been able to find something to move on to. So I have been unhappy, unfulfilled, and felt unappreciated. However, I am hopeful and inspired by the change in role for me and the potential to expand my skill set into more interesting work in strategic planning.

I went back to therapy - probably later than I should have, but the important thing is I'm there. It's tough work, but I no longer wake up feeling like there's a tight hand gripping inside my chest.

The election of the current president has been quite horrifyingly significant- to watch all of the government systems in the country that protect people and environment be dismantled has been a nightmare.

I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer, and underwent surgery, chemotherapy and radiotherapy. It turned my life upside down, and was quite horrible in many parts, but I have made it through and am grateful for my life, and the people who supported me in retaining it.

Three big things: I bought a house, I did the Tribe 12 fellowship and I had mono. The house has helped me in so many ways. First, I feel more settled. Second, I have responsibility more than just my company and myself. It’s a hobby and obsession; something else to think about. Third, it’s forced me to really accept support from family and others. Doing Tribe 12 helped me two ways: 1) to meet new people and friends here in Philly. And 2) to realize my bigger picture as a media personality and story teller. I know now where I’m going. Mono gave me a break. It was painful and upsetting, and it hurt financially. But it pushed me to realize a few things about what was now possible with the house and with my business.

We went to Israel in December. It was incredible to feel the connection to our ancestors who fought so hard to stay relevant as a people. The trip also culminated a 13-year process of saving $$ and frequent flier miles, and it worked out splendidly all around.

Seeing the musical Jagged Little Pill this summer seemed really life changing. Exploring race, gender, sexual identity, surviving sexual assault along with music that was familiar, but used to explain a different story than I had always associated it with. I’m extrememely grateful for this experience as it led me to discuss with my wife an assault I survived that I didn’t even count among my experiences as a survivor until experiencing it as a part of one of the characters survival stories.

Last year, September, I released a ministry I founded and pastored 8 years ago to one of my spiritual sons. It was an amazing and very inspirational journey to get to that place. I experienced both relief and excitement as both he and I are being led in new directions.

Diagnosed with breast cancer after MRI. Followed up by surgery on May 29. Grateful for BRCA2 Dx and additional screening that this was found very early. And relieved that they think they got all of it and that I do not require either chemo or radiation. The additional screening I got because of BRACA2 diagnosis did what it was supposed to do.

I started off the year with one goal. To be the best person I could. To put my head down and work hard, figure what next in my career. And then I quit my job and became a freelancer. And then when I thought things couldn't be better, I met someone. And he turned out to be just the person meant for me. And I believe it happened only because I wasn't looking for him. I was looking for me. And it just happened we both found her.

Grandma Kurtz died. It was partially a relief since she had been suffering for so very long with Parkinson's and dementia. It was very hard, though, to lose her. Even though we really lost who she was 8 years ago we could at least still see her and talk with her. I miss her a great deal and I'm struggling with honoring her memory without dwelling on the past.

-The apparent widening chasm between the Democratic and Republican parties. - Sad -Disregard for life in Baltimore City - Sad -How many more "positions" there are than people looking for them. - Optimistic Amazing ability of President Trump to operate without a filter. - Befuddled

I started making a lot of money by my standards. I am grateful, as I am able to buy things for myself and family that I was not able to before. I bought my sister a Gucci card holder; bought my mom a Prada wallet and so many other things that I've lost count. I will be moving in a few weeks and was able to buy high end decor. More than "stuff", I feel that this affords us a quality of life that we have not experienced before. Once I have my place settled, my plan is to do nothing but save and acquire more clients. While money is not "everything", I suffered from severe depression without it after longterm unemployment. People who say "money doesn't buy happiness" have never suffered from unemployment the way some of us have.

I went on a "Vision Quest" last November -- 11 days of being in the desert, including a 3-day solo vision fast. It reminded me that who I am and how I belong in the world has little to do, ultimately, with what I have accomplished, my talents, my skills. It is about the essence of my soul as a beloved spark of the divine. And this recognition evokes in my soul a longing to participate in the world in my unique way, to "sing my song", to share what strength, wisdom, or talent I do have to build up the community of all beings and non-beings. It was an inspiring experience, and one that has been difficult to hold and recollect in the midst of "real life", my "X", and the consumer culture that I am immersed in daily.

In May, I graduated from my PhD program. I thought I'd feel more pride at the time, but for some reason, I find myself feeling almost as though I cheated, and don't truly deserve the Dr. title. I don't know why I can't accept this accomplishment as a result of my hard work and dedication. I know it is related to my awareness of my privilege and the educational inequities that persist, keeping others who more capable from earning the same degree. I get embarrassed when people laud me for completing the degree while bringing two babies into the world. I would like to work on this, and take more pride in this accomplishment, yet remain committed to working against systems of oppressions.

I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. It was a shock. I have kind of felt like I have been in this state of being strong for everyone else for the last 10 months. I am doing great, but I have my days. I have moments of gratitude for this gift that taught me to listen to my body, be more present and slow down. But I hate it at the same time. It’s annoying, non forgiving and it affects how my body functions - which makes life more difficult. Cancer sucks - no matter which kind you have. Fuck you cancer.

This year I have been raising my children - Aria and Weston Bray who were born on June 28, 2017. I didn't fill this out last year so I haven't had the chance to reflect and while they weren't born in the last Jewish calendar year, having them in my life is the most significant experience of my life. Motherhood feels like a slick, slippery creature of delight and difficulty and dread. My girls fill me with joy I have never known, brings rise to anger lurking deep in my belly I didn't realize was there and an apathy derived from the boredom of routine and housekeeping. I am all of the feelings listed in this question. I love them so much, they are so beautiful, they inspire me to be a better person and have given me strength and purpose I have never known. But they are twins and it is challenging, my wants are on hold and I grieve the idyllic motherhood experience.

Starting my Masters Degree has been the most significant experience. It has affected me in so many ways, making me look at my relationship to my practice more closely, and at myself as an artist differently. It's also been really scary, and anxiety inducing. I've had to confront flaws in my work ethic, so it's also made me change certain ways of being. I think the whole adventure is transformative. It's exciting, invigorating, scary, and good. It makes me feel time even more acutely than I did before. But it is unquestionably a step towards myself.

The most significant thing that has occurred in the past year is my husband leaving his job to start a business of his own. It has changed the trajectory and focus of our lives. The risk is significant. It leaves me feeling both worried and relieved that our future is in our hands. I'm inspired and have faith and confidence in my husband but I also recognize the great difficulty that faces us. It's a balancing act between the excitement and terror of the situation. We are at a moment in our lives that this kind of risk could cost us a lot with little time left to recover if it fails which makes this especially frightening. We are also at a time when the experience we've accumulated would serve our family better if it's put to work for us instead of for someone else. I'm nervous about the future with a heave dose of optimism. This coming year will tell the tail.

Remote Year. And all of the above. I'm beyond grateful for the experience. It has given me passion again and hope and simply a love of life that I think had been drained form me a little. I'm both relieved and sad that its over. It has inspired me to get out there, to not sweat the small stuff so much and just love living.

I got sick with pneumonia in the middle of summer. I had been pushing myself very hard to go through and train a large number of new people, and didn't take any time off. In the end, I had to take a week off, and I feel like I'm still recovering from it. It was unpleasant, and has reminded me of my mortality. Up until that, I've never really considered dying as something I would have to deal with. Now, I do.

I took on a new role at school, as a homeroom teacher. It required more investment in students, including discipline, encouragement and so much more. It was a challenge that required so much patience, and some tears as well. But I feel like I was able to support the students after their difficult years at school, so it felt worth the effort

For the first time in nearly 10 years, I moved cities. Relocating from Portland to Chicago was a big leap but has proven a great experience so far. We've made a lot of new friends, but I still miss a lot about Portland. I feel good about where we are and the life we are building here; every now and then, though, I do have some pangs thinking about how easy Portland was.

The end of my engagement with my ex was a significant experience for me that happened in June 2017. While it occurred slightly over a year ago, it is an experience that has still impacted me to this day. I have grown a lot this past year, learned a lot about myself, but a number of failed attempts at new relationships has made me realize that I am not ready to commit to someone. I am not yet ready to jump into a committed relationship and that is okay. It has taken some time to adjust my expectations around where I thought I would be at this point in my life. But, I am exactly where I need to be.

The most significant change of the year, and potentially my life, is that my mother died in December. It has affected every aspect of my life, but mostly it has made me realize that I should do the thing, take the chance, see the show, spend the money, and tell the people I love how I feel about them every chance I get.

Traveling to Taizé with the Trinity youth group was a huge experience for me. It pushed me way outside my comfort zone, and it has changed the way I approach my duties as a youth mentor. I feel inspired by the bonds the teens formed with each other while we were away, and I feel hopeful and optimistic the upcoming year. I'll be interested to see whether this experience sticks with me, and in what ways. I returned about a month ago, so I think it's possible that I'm still on a high from the experience, and things might fade a bit over the coming months.

This year was the first year that I voted in a local election. It happened later in the second half of the year and, to be honest, I thought that my significant moment would have something to do with my college experience, but that's not the case. I'm just so grateful to have the right to vote- and for the registration process to be so easy. Many people, even citizens, have a much more difficult time, so I am grateful for the privilege I have. Hopefully my vote will help change things for the better.

Most significant is the separation from the wife. This has changed my life the most. It made me resent her, but deep inside I feel so sad and lonely. And I forgive and feel bad for her because of my low self esteem and fear, I was lot able to provide for her and my family.

My wife had a dear Uncle and Aunt pass away within about three months of each other. She has yet to properly process her grief. She also has seen a significant drop in her income as a personal trainer. She is starting back to school at the age of 57 to become a Physical Therapist Assistant. Part of that is fueled by her natural inclination and curiosity as to how the body works. However, it's also a result of having to be on the receiving end of physical therapy for an inflamed nerve in her leg that was very painful. As she went through the process it was deeply moving to her to see other patients who had far more challenges than the ones she was facing. She began volunteering and it's been very rewarding for her. I suggested that she might go to school and that took us both down a path that has been far more difficult and challenging than either one of us ever imagined. Going back to school after not darkening the door of a classroom for 39 years is a daunting proposition. So the significant experience for me has been walking beside her for the last year and trying to be the best supporter and helpmate possible. I am grateful for the opportunity for her and for me to do all that I can to show her support. I'm not relieved or resentful but I am inspired by her willingness to reinvent herself at this point in her life.

It's very recent, but I moved to Alabama for a job. It's temporary, but the money is great. I finally have my own place and I am excited about creating a good routine. I already have a checklist for the morning and night time. I may not see my friends as much but at least I can focus on myself. I am grateful for this opportunity. There maybe downsides but I see only upsides.

I had two miscarriages and now I'm pregnant again. Those have really been the experiences around which the rest of the year has revolved. It's been an emotional roller coaster.

I fell in love! I am grateful and a little nervous about all the things that are going to have to change in my life to make room for another person.

I decided to ween off my SSRI's because I was tired of being sick all the time and thought I was ready. I was not. I suffered serious health issues including a lot of weight loss and a lot of unnecessary anxiety. Somehow I found the strength to get wait listed to see a new psychiatrist who would take my side effects seriously. She listened to me carefully and explained using math why being unmedicated was not an option for me. Then she promised to never put me on medicine that made me sick again. She put me on a different type of SSRI and within a day I was feeling better. One month in and I feel better than I've ever felt and realize I really truly was suffering my whole life from a chemical imbalance, not a weakness of character. The drugs cleared up my tummy without me thinking that was a possibility which is all the proof I need that the chemical imbalance was real. Now that I feel better, I feel like I wasted the last 4 years of my life and am determined to do more with the time I have. I was resentful that I'd been ignored by the original doctor and left to suffer but I'm grateful I persevered and found someone who was able to help me.

This year, as part of my training program for my job, I went through an intensive week focused on training, public speaking, and presentations. It was unlike any training I've participated in before. I received great meaningful feedback about filler words, body movement and posture, facial expressions, and presentation preparation. My new job relies heavily on public speaking skills, and while I've thought for a while that I had a good level of comfort and skill in this area, that week of training uncovered a lot of growth areas for me. I have taken the feedback I received from my peers and tried to incorporate it into my work, and I hope to continue to improve in these and other areas of speaking and presenting through my career. I was relieved and enlightened to receive the feedback that I did, in the environment that I did. I was glad to get that type of feedback in a space where it was safe to make mistakes and improve, and would much rather get that feedback now than years down the road and well into my career.

I had a physical change and subsequent investigation that made me truly worried I had cancer. I am grateful and wish I could keep more of the heightened sense of life I had when I was so worried.

I ended up working in a job with the most amazing and supportive supervisor. This helped me to rebuild my confidence and I've started to grow back into some semblance of a confident person. I am so grateful, and I hope to be able to continue the momentum.

I moved into my very own apartment for the first time ever. I was absolutely terrified to be on my own - to not have the distraction of another person to fill in the void of silence. But I have adapted and flourished within the silence. I am now working on finding a way to balance my work life and personal life and trying to find constructive and creative ways to fill the silence instead of just watching Netflix all the time.

My son Abraham was born last Tuesday night, after Lauren endured emergency surgery for an abdominal hemorrhage. The experience was harrowing, and shook me to the core, left me speechless and shell-shocked, traumatized, seeing my lobster-red, tiny son writhing on a tray as the surgeons lifted Lauren's cauterized fibroid from her incision and asked my opinion about removing it. And yet she is alive, and he is alive, and I'm holding onto hope that everything will be okay, until it isn't again.

I got married! To an amazing, supportive, generous, kind, thoughtful, intelligent, handsome, loved, loving, ambitious, quirky, funny man. It affected me in ways that I never expected - with a lot of anxiety, which ultimately allowed me to reflect and grow, and then with humility, which has created a strong foundation for our relationship. I am so grateful for my husband, relieved that the wedding planning process is behind me, and inspired to have a good, successful marriage.

This past year, I lost my company, Bookstr to two people that I really can't stand. However, I have just rented a new apartment and am feeling more grateful than ever about what the future can hold. I also let my ex boyfriend back into my life and I am so happy that I did. He has been an amazing anchor to me and I hope I can learn to be that for him. I was living on people's sofa's for 5+ months of the year this year and really was able to gain some perspective. It feels really weird having all of my things out of storage. I hope that I do not become resentful, so far I have felt truly an overwhelming sense of gratitude. In business I have met so many great people and I lost touch with everyone who betrayed me in business last year. I am so happy to be around new people and excited to see where things lead.

After all the excitement and bubbles of my answer last year, this year is on the other end of the emotional spectrum. My daughter had been living with us because she couldn't find a place to live on her income. She worked for a couple of years, then, after her daughter was born, she was let go from her job because of 7 absences in one year. We then told her she could stay because she could take care of the house cleaning and keep an eye on her niece/our granddaughter. To make a long story short, she did almost nothing. Our house turned into a disaster area (we still don't have it totally fixed), she didn't take care of her children, instead, she expected our granddaughter to do it on top of school work and chores. Then she abruptly moved out. No word to us, she just packed her stuff one day and left. My feelings are mixed. I feel relieved that she is gone, angry that she left in that manner. (This is a repeated behavior of hers.) Resigned that she is not the person I thought she was. I always felt that she was acting for my benefit. Now I know she is. On the other hand, I converted to Judaism! The more I explore Judaism, the more I realize this is the way for me. Just the other day I told my husband, "I LOVE being a Jew!" The last thing is that I had a friend lose her son. Having experienced the loss of a child I have made a big attempt to help her through the worst of it and am still being there for her. She has a long way to go yet and I hurt for her. This has inspired me to want to possibly volunteer for grief counseling. I'm not a counselor, but I think I could help someone along the way based on my own experience.

In the past year, I went SCUBA diving for the first time. I'd learned how to do it in late August, but didn't get certified until September and went on my first trip with Brendan, in May. I do feel grateful—SCUBA diving is a sport for privileged people, and that shouldn't be overlooked. And there's something about being in complete control of your body that feels absolutely freeing. You have to trust in yourself and your equipment and your partner, but at the end of the day it's you who's making sure you get back to the surface alive. Especially on the night dive—seeing lobsters and octopi on the ocean floor, and that perfect rainbow squid puffing its way past our faces—the way astronauts must feel suspended in space, but not nearly so lonely. I felt inspired to keep learning new things and challenging myself. And I felt (feel) capable.

My life in the past year has been a series of small events, none that were truly life changing, but in combination have conspired to change my life. I have grown to accept my job and the circumstances surrounding it. I spent a lot of time fighting it last year, and that wasn't a great place to life my life. This past year, I've gone from resentfully accepting it to just accepting it with some sort of peace. I have worked toward advancing myself in my education both with my job, but also as a coach. I have grown a lot as a CrossFit coach in the past year. I have learned more and become more confident. I have also changed my long-term goals when it comes to being an athlete and coaching. I thought for a long time that my goal was to be an elite athlete in my age group. While I'm not giving up on being better, I am not striving to be one of the best. However, I do want to be one of the best coaches. Being an athlete might not fall under my talents, but being a coach does. I am gifted in teaching individuals and helping them resolve their problems at both jobs. Sometimes I get frustrated because I feel like I don't make a difference in the lives of students anymore, but I am making a difference with the adults in my life.

Just about one year ago, we dealt with Hurricane Irma. It affected me greatly as it forced me to consider what is important in life (people, safety, health) and what is not (things, pleasing an employer at the risk of your personal safety, plans). It has also left me with some residual hurricane-related anxiety that is pretty relevant right about now on the cusp of Hurricane Florence, which is thankfully not heading this way.

I made the decision to move to Los Angeles (I will be moving in December). This has been in the back of my mind for a couple of years, but after I the death of my mom and my moving into a new apartment, I've felt pretty rootless and in need of a change. I guess the "experience" has not happened yet. Just the decision to create the experience. I'm excited and nervous.

I was going to say Matt getting his job, because that was a big turning point in terms of his well-being and our financial stability, but actually I think being apart for two months might have been a more significant experience for me. It was kind of harrowing, but I was happy to see that I could function on my own and keep up with working out and housework and stuff. I could also see the things that I had more trouble doing alone, like taking care of myself, having fun, and relaxing. Reading books, for example. It made me appreciate my partner much, much more! It also made me confront the fact that I need to think more about what I want out of my life, and try to make active choices rather than just doing what's expected of me. I find it very hard to admit to wanting and liking anything without belittling and dismissing it. Hopefully therapy is helping with that? A year and change into my postdoc, I'm trying to relax into it and take it as time to recover from my PhD and regroup for whatever comes next, without sinking too much energy into worrying about what that what-comes-next is. I can't plan for or control what opportunities I have, but I can try to make sure I'm ready to respond to them - decide whether they're for me, and be in the best possible frame of mind to go for them if they are.

Within the past year, a significant experience I had was meeting my nephew, Avi, for the first time. This is the son of my middle brother Martin and his wife Tilly. Looking back, this experience made me once again realize how lucky I am to be a part of my family. We truly love one another and I know how fortunate I am to have that in my life. Little Avi is the happiest little guy and seeing him with my brother and sister-in-law made me think about my own relationships. It's been quite a while since I've had a significant relationship and I feel that I truly want something meaningful. Their relationship and love for one another and now their son Avi inspires me to seek the same. I'm grateful for my family, my nephew, and to have something positive to inspire to. May this next year be filled with love and family.

The loss of another relationship. Slightly releived actually, we were just too different people

I found out my mom has cancer. My first worry was for all the things I'm not ready to do without her being there. I don't know how to get married, or have a baby, or become a mother without having my mom there. I would barely know how to get through the mothering that I do now if I didn't have my mom to turn to. Her cancer is stage four. I wonder how long she's been sick and we didn't know. I wonder how many fights over the last two or three or four years I fought with her while she was sick. I think about all the things she did for me while she was sick. I'm so sad for her, I'm worried for myself, I feel helpless. It's so hard to take care of a parent. It's a total turning of every familiar dynamic on its head. It feels wrong, and I feel like I don't do a good enough job. I don't take care of her as well as she would take care of me. And I'm still so dependent in so many ways, having to learn on her for help. There's so much I wouldn't know how to do if she died tomorrow.

I started CrossFit at the very beginning of this year. It has changed my self confidence, built muscles, and built a great community in my life.

My friend Chris was destroyed by a bacterial infection. I saw how quickly a healthy person's life could be upended. I also rose to the occasion. Some of that was selfish -- I needed to escape my own depression -- but I practiced the old "to have a friend, be a friend" saying, and I was able to be of help. I still think there's a lot of self-interest there, but I have been enriched by being around Chris' positive take on her nightmare. They say it's hard to be sad and useful at the same time, and I found meaning in being of use.

I saw a look of wonder in my infant son's eyes as he put his hand under running water for the first time and was amazed. It made me feel tremendously grateful for the place and time in which I live and the seemingly little things I take for granted.

I had a multi-month significant experience called product management. I wrote last year that I was proud of my work situation, and felt valued there. Well, I was so valued that I was moved to another department. The other department had its problems, and they felt (and I agreed) that I was the best person to solve them; I had the skillset, the vision, the background and experience. I was ready for a change, the project management I had been doing was starting to feel stale. But product management wasn't the right change for me. It was different in ways I didn't like. And I wasn't empowered by my organization. They trusted me, but essentially said that if I wanted power, I needed to take it and earn it. I felt like I was floundering for the first 3 months. By the 4th month, things had evened out. I was coming out on top; I was doing the job, and doing it well. I had assumed a lot of leadership and was respected and things were going better. Better isn't great though. They still weren't paying me more even though it was a more valuable title. and the job had longer hours and was more stressful. Around month 3, I was so stressed out that when an opportunity to look into another job presented itself, I did. The offer from the other job came right around the time things were evening out and I was feeling better... I hesitated a bit because of that, but I was being offered a 25% raise in an industry I was interested in, at a company where a friend worked, close to my house, with free parking... It was too great to pass up. And I am SO glad I didn't. I am so grateful for the opportunity to try out this new job, and so relieved for the impact it has had on my family life. I mentioned last year that I was tired. The product management role just made me MORE tired. I worked until 10pm one day. I was so mentally exhausted that even if I got home early, I wasn't really engaging with my son. All of that has changed, and I'm so happy about it!

It's interesting how my mind instinctively wants to go toward the negative experiences. Doesn't matter that I've traveled to New Orleans, Ireland, and Iceland, and soon plan to embark to the Pacific Northwest this year. That I kept with the tradition of an annual camping trip. That my relationships with my daughter and the true friends I've made in NYC are operating at optimum levels. That I finally have a decent boss at my job who doesn't make me think of quitting every day. That I've regained some freelance clients and started getting paid for watercolor painting. I feel rewarded by all of that, yet... the absence of you–whether you're someone from the past or from the future who I haven't met–that absence causes all that is worthwhile to pale in comparison. Why is that? How can I miss something I never had?

In many ways, I suppose this year has been the most significant for me in a long time, at least if you consider giant life changes. I moved out of my home of 16 years, away from my husband of 17 years (partner of 25) and into the home I bought. In addition, I've started a new romantic relationship in the last four months, one that has changed the color of my life. I have chosen to stop framing the shift in my life in terms of shame and regret and instead focus on how I'm having the opportunity to grow and learn with new challenges in my life. Sometimes things really suck, when I feel stressed about supporting myself, stressed about how much work I have on my plate stressed about being a good mom, about my health and aging, but in many ways I've moved passed the sadness and pain of the last few years and into a more hopeful and joyful time of my life. Moving and setting up my home gave me a sense of accomplishment and independence, and meeting someone has brought me a new chance at building a healthy relationship, to live in the light and enjoy love and company.

Death of a business, death of a family member, but not death of hope. Hoping that we continue to remain connected to community and family through all the changes.

I had a severe episode of what I think might have been seasonal depression, but could also have been the existential crisis that creeps in about every 8 years. The abject terror of nothingness took hold and for several weeks I was just doing what had to be done in order to keep my job and stay alive, but in the quiet moments, all I could think about was the end of all things. It felt like I was teetering on the edge of the abyss. A turning point was when my friend Lynn came over to give me good human touch. We just relaxed on my bed and talked about everything. I had been afraid to ask for help in case it was contagious and I might infect someone else with this existential horror. The philosophical result was that I decided eternity is now, and I decided I needed to take steps to ensure my happiness because now is the only time I have to be happy. Right now. Not later. It's hard to do that in this late-stage capitalism experiment we have going right now. That exact phrase, "eternity is now" has become my mantra. This is all completely real, and yet it is all a dream. We are collectively dreaming up this reality and I feel more determined to dream something good. I've been taking more opportunities to dip out of the matrix for awhile, including the intentional, careful engagement with mind-altering experiences.

I think the most significant experience that I had this year is that I met someone who has become one of my very closest friends very quickly. While we initially seemed like exact doppelgangers, it's now become clear that we're very different people--who still get along really well. I'm grateful to have met here, and I think meeting her was really significant and also indicative of the path that my life is currently taking: out of hiding and into friendship.

While not directly to myself, my partner quit his job and is undertaking a completely different career path. While I anticipated some stressors to result from this change, I didn't, couldn't, anticipate to the level they have. In the beginning, and even now, I am very proud and grateful that he is taking this step. It was much needed. However I must admit that at times I have thoughts of resentment. If I am going to be honest the resentment is really just the stress of being the primary financial supporter in this partnership. We had plans to have a large wedding in 2019 and now I fear that may not be a reality. When I have these feelings I quickly tell myself that this is a moment in time and we will be better as a couple when he has finished his program. he will be happier which will make us happier.

In November 2017, almost 1 year ago, my divorce was finalized. At the time I felt relieved, like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders, but I also felt sad, because I didn't want it to happen. I was still depressed over the loss of the relationship at the time, but now, over 2 years since septation, I'm feeling good about it. I still wish it hadn't happened, but I'm no longer chronically depressed. I'm ready to move on with my life.

I got moved into an IT group - and it's been very rocky. We're losing KP (who is a good friend, and a phenomenal worker), and not sure how my career will go from here. Perhaps I'll have to retire earlier than I'd planned.

Oct 2017 I was laid off from my high paying job. I was unemployed for 3 months. It was one of the toughest times in my life. I was terribly depressed, my anxiety and worry were out of control. I didn't realize how highly I valued my monetary input to our family and how it defined me. I was completely reset, broken down and rebuilt with new values, a better understanding of myself and my focus on life. It was a gift from my higher power but it was a terribly tough lesson.

I met an amazing group of people this past year. Specifically I met a girl who I would literally travel all over to chase...and I didn’t think that that was possible. I see myself as pretty broken and I lack confidence in my true self but I overcompensate by being confident in the fake version of myself that so many people know. This girl changed that. She accepted me for me, she made me feel loved. She let me let go. I’m grateful, I’m relieved, and I’m interested yet still reserved to see where she takes me and how I change moving forward.

I applied, was accepted amd started graduate school this past year. I’m grateful to be furthering my education at little cost. I’m scared of the balancing act required between classes, internship and full time work. I’m excited for the doors the MSW program will open for me, once I have my degree and licensure. I’m also just plain proud of myself for getting motivated to pursue and achieve every part of this dream so far.

Switched focuses in my masters degree. Inspired and surprised that this opportunity opened at exactly the right time. A reminder that sometimes you don't know, what you don't know.

I've started doing regularly guided meditations, and the first one was particularly powerful. Prior to doing it I was in a very low place, and it brought me out of it. I felt so much happier, and it inspired a shift in my internal thought process. Since that day I've made an effort to express gratitude every day.

I finally got divorced. I'm not sure how I feel about this experience, I tried to not think about it during the process. I stuck to the facts and did what we needed to do. I was relieved the day I found out the judge had granted the decree.

I had counselling - EMDR counselling and it's been quite life changing in a really subtle way. I was so full of anxiety, social and general. I was obsessed with time - making sure my alarms (yes, plural!) were set, clothes all set out ready, bag packed, lunch made to ensure I left at an exact time or I'd most definitely be late which would cause me to have a bit of a melt down but I've released I don't do that anymore. I still don't like being late but it's not something that causes me such turmoil anymore. My social anxiety has improved ten fold, I now feel comfortable making plans, asking to meet up with people or joining conversations. I was so afraid of rejection and being humiliated I never made that move - I'd barely go out even if I was asked. Same with clothing and how I look, I'd need to look "perfect" or I wouldn't be able to do anything. I do still have bad days but it's not such a overpowering burden that stops me from joining in things. I think everyone should have EDMR!!

Printing my linocut on silk chiffon with a master printer. Profound gratitude in the daring to live a daily practice of art, prayer and expression, and clearing the klipot of fear to experiment and grow in supportive community. Deeply moved and inspired to flow within my sacred gifts, the divine spark of creativity, my soul spark.

I watched my friend manipulate someone who cared about her and she made him do things he would never do. I also saw how it affected him and she didn't care. This experience was eye opening and really made me realize that we need to be careful and picky with who we trust and who care about even though it can be hard to control and manage these things.

My daughter and I got to spend 8 weeks together on maternity leave. It blew my mind on levels I can only partially explain. I fell madly in love with her and discovered that I loved being a mom. It was really inspiring where I was like "I want to protect and nurture this little child and contribute to a better world for her" so I have been really thinking a lot about becoming a better person thanks to her and how to care for her and teach her.

I was recognized with an award for outstanding contribution to my med group. It was based on a 15 year project. It was wonderful to be recognized but I realize it was the act of doing the work that was most valuable.

Nothing comes to mind of great significance. I take care of my dad's needs day to day, and watch him decline mentally day to day. It's very sad; he was once so sharp that he always had some kind of witty comeback.

My most significant experience has been my son's flunking out of college. He has chosen a 'trade' route which I hope brings him some joy. I'm disappointed. Disappointed in the future he has opted out of. And very sad and all the potential lost.

There are a few. 1- graduating PA school 2- not being able to find a job in Austin as I had planned and the disappointment that brought with it 3- getting a job in the city and moving into my UES apartment I think all of these experiences have lead me to more fully realize the work I need to put in to make things happen for myself. I cannot rely on other people helping me or leading me to what I want. This is hard because I still don’t feel like a real adult and I don’t trust myself to make these choices. I still feel like a kid and I don’t know when that will change. But I am happy with where I have ended up so far and the steps I am taking

I feel like there were a few times where my marriage almost didn't make it. I felt frustrated and powerless, even though a lot of the damage was my fault. (More than 50%.)

March of this past year I broke up with my boyfriend. It was hard but it was the most liberating thing I could have done for myself. Initially I was upset and broken down but the farther I got from the relationship, the more toxic I realized it was. I am so relieved to have gotten out when I did. I didn't realize how much I had changed and how his insecurities were weighing me down and holding me back within my own life. Since leaving the relationship I've build much deeper connections and friendships with my friends in Chicago. I'm no longer holding back because of the thought that I'll be leaving soon. I am so much happier and healthier, both physically and mentally.

Separated from my husband of 17 years. i am grateful to be free. i am resentful a bit of all i did for him and got nothing in return except heartache and annoyance. i am inspired to finally reach for my goals in life and become who i want to be not who i am expected to be

A significant experience that happen this year was my physical. I turned 34 this year and I went to the doctor's office and weighted myself. I was almost 200 pounds! Never in my life have I ever been close to that weight. My cholesterol was over 200 again. It affects me because I realized that the way I have been living my life over the past few years is not how it needs to be for myself and for my family. I have set into motion certain things that I am committed to doing. 1. Wake up 2. Drink water 3. Meditate 4. Write in my journal my thoughts and goals for the day 5. Work Out By putting into motion these specific things in the morning, I am trying to accomplish these goals: 1. Lower my weight to 175 2. Lower my cholesterol to under 200 3. Feel better about myself 4. Have clear goals in my career and personal life 5. Eat better I believe that by doing this I will complete these goals and have a more positive and productive life.

My boyfriend and I bought a house. It makes me worried and proud. Worried, because we are not married and what if something happens to him? Proud, because I never thought I would be in a position to own property. It's also teaching me a lot about things I never had to consider as a renter.

I had gotten my braces of 5 days ago after having them for 2 years and a half. What a relief. My face has changes significantly because of it so I'm still trying to get use to the way I look now. I feel like my face is a little older.

For the first time in my life, I contributed to a campaign fund. It wasn't a significant amount of money, but it was significant in the idea that I could put money where my mouth is. I'm worried about the state of the country, and I'm willing to invest a little of my own cash to help shift politics.

Technically the birth of my son was a little more than a year ago, but at the time of this writing, we are still fewer than 365 days from when we took him home from the NICU. It's obviously affected me more than anything else in my life, across a wide spectrum of emotions. His first month was the hardest thing I've ever been through, but he came out of it and is an amazing person. I'm relieved that he exhibits no symptoms of what kept him in the hospital in the first place, and am looking forward to being his father for the rest of my life.

Two of my sisters were married this summer and my uncle (who made a pass at me) was in attendance of the 2nd wedding. This is the first time I have been face to face with him since my grandmother's funeral. I was able to successfully take care of myself at the wedding. I did not give him a hug (which he is used to receiving) and did not talk to him the entire night. He used to be the one I would go to and spend time with. I felt so incredibly empowered that day and since then as well. However, after coming home I found the other side challenging to process. I became more isolated and my anxiety was through the roof. A positive from this is that I decided to go back on a daily med to help my anxiety and get me on track in my life. I don't like feeling so anxious and awful. I have been taking the medication for about 2 weeks now and I am hopeful that it will work.

Not be able to get a real girlfriend.....

I published the book this year; and it feels so far away now, but I only shipped them in May (which is 5 months ago). I wrote a large portion of the book this year, formatted it, rolled it out as weekly chapters, and generally just did most of it. Holy crap. I am so grateful to all the supporters, I am so happy that I pushed through to do it.

Losing a large amount of weight -- it's been an extremely difficult journey with a lot of sacrifice and hard work, and I'm most of the way there -- here's hoping I make it to the finish line.

I got mugged at gunpoint in the past year (specifically on June 1). It shocked me entirely when it happened, but also propelled me further with standup and writing my pilot (though I'm not done with that as of right now). I did feel resentful about it at first, but was able to turn that around pretty quickly into feeling grateful and inspired (I don't know about relieved, although the fact that I had material to use for standup and also that I felt like I could use that as the thing that happens in the pilot I guess was a relief of some sort). I also moved to LA and started doing TM, and those are both things that connect directly to the mugging, which happened in LA on my way home from the second day of TM training. I feel very grateful for the move and for TM, and also that I recently moved from Hollywood, where I lived first in LA, to West Hollywood, where I am living second.

I survived a departure of leadership, massive layoffs and overall corporate tumult and was able to leverage my position to maneuver an internal transfer to San Francisco. I feel relieved and empowered- and excited for my new life in California. Leaving NY was a major goal of mine and I feel proud that I was able to accomplish it. I did spend much of the year feeling resentful toward my professional situation, but that dissipated quickly after I left NY. Now, I feel grateful for my experiences in NY in ways I couldn't have expected.

The most significant was my treatment for and ongoing recovery from breast cancer. It brought me up close to my own mortality, it showed me my heart in a different way than I'd seen it before. As I said to the survivorship nurse, I approached this with the kind of attitude that my mother brought to her cancer 34 years ago: surrender and openness to the future with a positive spin. It carried me a good long way through the year, and I did fall apart finally, but that underlying approach is what came through. This leaves me feeling empowered to deal with my life in the future, I'll find my way through whatever comes my way.

I discovered, in May, that I'm pregnant! I'd say that's pretty significant. I was (& am still) terrified but I know that God made me for this and I will be able to get through it.

I quit my second job, and then I changed my mind and restarted my second job. I wanted to spend more time on my home life, on my creative life. It was nice to have a break, but the financial reality forced me back to work. Sometimes I'm tired and regret having to work the second job. Mostly I'm grateful that I could return so easily. I'm hopeful that with some discipline, I can position myself to regain personal and creative time again someday.

This year I got my first promotion at a day job. It was terrible! So far it has only been bad things and no good things. Maybe at some point it will help me, but this year has been awful.

I wanted to kill myself! I checked myself into the hospital, which was unbelievable scary at first. I was put in this small room for a long time, and couldn't really see past the moment. I had to tell my mom what happened. I don't think being in the hospital was a completely transformative experience, I still had a lot of work to do after I got out. But it gave me a respite. And mostly I met a lot of characters. I really hope I remember them. It just opened my eyes to how beautifully painful being a human is. There were some wonderful moments and also some heartbreaking ones. But it made me feel like, yes, I have something in common with everyone, and that is that we all hurt and heal and crave love and acceptance. And I think I have grown from that experience, of being held and supported by a community that is struggling to feel, and moving past that. I hope everyone is doing better.

I had a romantic relationship that made me believe in romantic relationships.

Once again, I pretty much missed out on significant experiences, for better or worse. Nothing seems to inspire strong feelings, positive or negative in me any more.

I ended a 2 year relationship with Kevin. I also had to put down my 13.5 year old dog Yuki. Both of these have been big losses. I've been struggling to allow myself to feel what I need to feel. It's okay to cry. It's okay to feel. Grieve, be sad, and celebrate the good things too. All of these are fine. The interesting thing is that allowing myself to feel what I need to feel has caused me to grieve and process other losses (my relationship with Jacob, my idea that I would have already had life "figured out").

Being awoken to the oneness around all of us, the incredible overwhelmingness of it. I feel inspired, grateful, and also determined to try and carry that in my life as much as possible.

I climbed Mount Kilimanjaro! Even though I had to have help to make it the last quarter mile or so, it made me feel empowered. I felt like if I could conquer this feat, I could take on anything life has to throw at me. The fact that I needed help made sense, I need help in all things, both from the people around me and from Christ, through whom all things are possible.

My sister posted 2 items which made me rethink how I respond to people who are grieving (especially), and how one shows good active listening. I felt sobered and saddened because in both sorts of situations, my responses have not been what I intended (helpful or sympathetic). I am grateful to have had the paradigm shift--to do my best to remember to listen and not chime in unasked with 'my similar situation or experience, and in the case of grief, not to offer typical words of comfort which focus on feeling better one way or another. Let the person grieve.

Well, I quit my job, trained for a new one and started a new career. It was more a reaction than a trigger. I am grateful that however bad things were I was able to move on to a better place.

I created a new program, Celtic Harp Blues, with a percussion player. We have since added a bass player. It's been inspiring to stretch myself musically and perform more for adults.

I had an ectopic pregnancy, and it changed and deeply affected me more than I have let be known. Not all for the negative, it also reminded me how precious life is and to never take anything or anyone for granted.

Making my first film, Check- it made me feel liberated and powerful! I can create my own work with my own words and with amazing people who are just as passionate as I am. The whole experience definitely made me feel more inspired about my career and capabilities. Like an untapped resource. And now I'm hooked! <3

After withdrawing from college after my first year, I moved in with some friends. It was nice change of pace having the complete freedom to do whatever I wanted without any familial obligations. As time passed, however, I felt like I was in a perpetual state of limbo. It didn't take long to convince myself to go move back in with my family and continue College. All in all, I can certainly say that I'm extremely grateful for my having family's support.

My wedding was one of the most significant. It makes me feel incredibly excited, happy, and relieved. While the wedding overall wasn't exactly what my husband or I wanted, we didn't really realize that until it was all over. That being said, the important part is that we are married, happy, and...it's all over! I do feel a small amount of regret that we spent so much money on it and that we didn't have a smaller, more intimate, and more low-key affair. I hope when I read this next year that I have "let go" of these feelings.

So, this is so fun to write this answer...I am actually pregnant! Today I am 10 weeks 2 days. I think I'm a bit nervous but we made it past 9 weeks 6 days (when we lost our first) so I am feeling pretty good. I am extremely grateful and trying to remain positive even though this has been no joke! I have been so fatigued and nauseous almost all the time and have had to adjust me eating habits and appetite. I think I am looking forward to being a parent with my hubs. We keep buying little onesies and other outfits for our little prune (it's a prune this week :) I am excited for this next year of firsts and have been putting positive energy out there. I am so grateful for my life and feel so lucky to be able to live my life every day. I can't wait to raise another human to be curious, compassionate, open-minded, intelligent, hard-working, kind, and empathetic. This is the best year yet.

On my lunchbreak in work, there was an accordian player on the high street. I was low from working both a high pressure busy job and the pressure of an exciting business opportunity where I was feeling pulled apart between the two. I wanted to feel better. I gave the musician some loose change and enquired whether he could play The Godfather Love Theme. It turns out he could, a wisened spaniard that looked straight out of the endless vineyards and dusty streets played the most earthy, utterly spine tingling rendition I've ever heard. Since then, when I walk past and he's playing, he bursts into the song again. I was looking for a sign to keep going with my business and afterwards I felt supercharged. Thank you Florian (the accordian player)

I ditched my full-time job/career and took my side gig full-time as a freelancer. It's scary from a financial perspective, but it also gives me the freedom to make my own schedule and determine my own path. I'm able to volunteer regularly on a political campaign, which I wouldn't have been able to do with my previous job. It's an enormous relief to leave the toxicity of my last workplace behind, which is reinforced every time I talk with former colleagues about how things are going there this year. And I feel healthier because I'm sleeping and eating when my body wants to rather than when the clock says I should (although I'm still trying to work out an ideal routine).

Launch (primarily funding for) the Self-Healing Communities project in CWC. It propelled me to the center of way more "public-ness" and politics than I prefer, though all was going fairly smoothly until late July.

Last week i got a tattoo. It was my first one. I was surprised at how emotional it was. I feel closer to my friend because of it. I feel closer to my family because of it. And the artist who did it. I've often read on tattoo posts, "Thank you for your trust." and I understand that now, trusting someone to mark you for life. I feel linked.

I left my marriage of 23 years. I have so many feelings: on the one hand, relieved to have finally taken this step, and inspired by the possibilities I see opening up ahead of me. On the other hand, I am sad to have caused great pain to my husband and child, and extended family; I am afraid of the many unknowns awaiting me; I am mourning the loss of my marriage. Above all, however, I feel grateful: I am still here, feeling and experiencing life fully, and so are those I love. It is hard, but at the same time exciting, and I feel like I am shedding an old skin and being reborn with the new year.

My sister is dying -- and that changes everything. Since we found out in May, I have worked really hard to heal what had been our estrangement. So, taking to heart some advice I read about what must be said when there's still time to say it, I can truly say that now we are healing -- emotionally, that is; there's no healing for her physically. But we're truly sisters again after so many years, and I can carry her with me in the years to come. That is the silver lining -- and it stinks, but it's wonderful too.

I fell off my bike and broke multiple bones. I originally was so sad that this event interrupted my fitness & diet routine but later realized that it was a lesson in adjustment and moving on. No regrets, I wouldn't have done anything differently and over time the scar will fade.

I got married! It was so much more of a hassle than I had expected, and although everything went better than I could have hoped for (there's always something that goes wrong, but there were only minor things that even I manage to put in perspective), I don't feel that it affected me in a big way. The bachelorette party and the love I received then (so many girls, spending a whole weekend away from there own loved ones to celebrate *me*) definitely was more overwhelming. In the long run, our decision to (at least part-time) get off birth control will probably (hopefully?) have a larger effect than getting married.

Moving out of Nana's and getting our own place ! Being close to work and school and feeling so independent and having healthy boundaries! About time!

Definitely the most significant experience that has happened to me this year was being told that my best friend and ex-boyfriend killed himself. I was in class when I got the message from his aunt, asking me if she could call me. Immediately I got a bad feeling—why would she message me, if not to talk about him? He was living in Japan, so there wasn’t much I could think of that would necessitate a call from his aunt. But as soon as I got out of class, I let her call me. I walked all the way back to my dorm room with tears streaming down my face. I was up in Davis for college, but I called my mom and told her what happened and she came and picked me up that same day. She left work early for me. It’s been almost 9 months since that day, and so much is different, but also the same. I’ve been living with the knowledge that the person who knows me best is not on this planet anymore. I’ve felt so incredibly alone at times, but also incredibly connected with everyone around me. I’ve felt some highs and lows, but the highs always manage to be dampened at least slightly when I remember that he is not here to share them with me. I don’t know. Something good? I guess I appreciate life a lot more. I check on my friends more often. But I haven’t been able to write since then.

This year, I made the decision to take control of my physical wellbeing and the rest of my life as a result. I underwent bariatric surgery and have [so far] lost over 120 pounds. It was a major decision, and was truthfully the best one I think I've ever made. The negative side effects have been minimal, and all completely worth it, because the positive results have been immeasurable. I am confident, healthy, and proud of myself. I've proven that I can change my life, which is the most amazing blessing.

I started receiving my Social Security money. Grateful and relieved as it came when Brenda's work at Quarry House began diminishing so we had another guaranteed money source!

My Ayahuasca ceremony experience in 8/18 was life transforming. Seems like indiscriminate changes but I believe a month later approx. my integration is continually evolving. here are the most important changes taking a firm hold from my Ayahuasca experience: 1) I quit smoking, cold turkey. This was a shame spiral challenge for me that is basically gone now. 2) My intimacy and love affair with my wife has hit a next level that I am amazed and ridiculously grateful for. 3) My relationship with money, and particularly the fear of not having enough is really taking hold. This is an area I want to really finally put behind me.

a divorce situation has shown me how much everything really mattered. While I feel clean of any resentment I have pain regarding the events and how it all happened. I am inspired by the transformation as I see how being engrossed in another persons needs actually left me feeling empty. I now am inspired to succeed based upon my calling and let go of being controlled by fear

I received my Bachelor's degree in medicine, which was a huge relief, and a big milestone on my journey to becoming a Doctor. I felt inspired, empowered and excited about the future. It's been a tough journey, and I've failed exams, doubted whether I could complete the degree etc - but my dream to become a Doctor helped me persist - and I did it!

This has been a doozy of a year. Here's the short list of significant experiences in the past year that has ultimately changed me and the trajectory of my life: - Oct 31 I found my mom collapsed in the shower for a hemorrhagic stroke - February 14 Ryan proposed and I said yes - May 5 I left D3 to start working at Mattel - August 25 I moved my mom in with me My emotions are kind of everywhere about everything. I think Grateful, Relieved, Resentful, and Inspired covers all of it really. My mom's stroke terrified me, devastated me, and challenged me. Sometimes I feel empowered by all the events that have followed me, because it's strengthened my conviction to my family and has reaffirmed the idea that I'm strong. However, there are many times that I feel like I'm drowning and I'm being crushed by the weight of it all. I feel indignant and bitter and I want to curse those that have such easy clear paths without as many obstacles, which of course I know is unfair and that ultimately I am also free of some of the challenges that face others. Most of the time I feel like screaming or drifting off into an indefinite sleep caused by utter exhaustion. Of course I'm happy that Ryan proposed. He has been such a solid force of support, love, and admiration throughout all of this. I feel like most people have to make the jump into marriage while the waters are unknown and untested, but not us. Sometimes it feels like it's us against the world and I can't put into words how much he means to me. Nonetheless, the stress of everything strains us sometimes and I can feel it. Us having to constantly put off talks about a wedding so we can attend to more "pressing matters" gives me the sense like I'm holding us back, holding him back. I watch my friends get married and start families without the obstacles we have to face and it adds to my bitterness. Of course I'm happy for them, but it makes me pity myself for not having the same opportunities. My departure from D3 was not an easy one. I'm not one for regrets and the only way I cling to my sanity is to keep my eyes looking forward and just pushing toward one goal or another. However, I still find myself feeling moments of sadness of the people and the work that I miss. Yet, I'm happy at Mattel, more or less. I feel challenged, I feel like I'm growing, improving, progressing.. I often feel like I'm working toward something big. A position in life in which I can handle any surprises life throws at me.. at least financially. I feel more powerful and independent. Also, in spite of everything, the job transition makes me feel like on top of everything else, my life is still progressing, moving forward, on an upward trajectory. The transition of my mom living with me is still on going. The first couple days was a complete disaster and it made me think I did everything wrong. I remain optimistic that water will find it's level in time and we'll be able to smooth into a routine of sorts and life will magically get slightly easier.

This summer I spent four weeks living and learning at Kibbutz Lotan in an ecovillage. The experience changed the way I view social justice work and community building, and I am grateful for the opportunity!

I had a vision of a large, robed and hooded, benevolent being tearing up an invoice in my name. It has affected me so profoundly since it happened in April. I interpret it as having paid my karmic debt - the one that has plagued me my whole life and had kept me from enjoying good fortune for worrying about those who do not have. I remain a compassionate person, but not a tortured one. I see evidence every day of this new way of being. It feels as though I was released from jail to live life on "the outside." The blessings continue to accumulate. It's not all bunnies and unicorns, but my life is joyful.

My mother has had some health issues. She's 88, and it has given me worry about the future. I mean, I know that she's relatively old, and we're lucky to still have her around and being as solid as she is, but it begins to put things in perspective. I'm resentful that I'm the one taking care of her, but I'm also glad that I can be here to do so. I worry about the uncertainty of what's to come, but I also know that there's nothing I can really do about it but take it as it comes, keep calm and carry on.

We decided to adopt. Then we decided to not adopt. I feel like I continue to stay stuck and mired even while retaining these cycles of extreme joy and extreme grief that have punctuated the past few years.

I feel like I am finally comfortable with me and able to stand up for myself in a meaningful way. I am better at internalizing "don't take it personally", "everyone is always only talking about themselves," and "unrequested advice is almost always seen as criticism." I have found I'm far more reflective in who I am and who I want to be. Regarding a specific experience, I would say the finalization of my divorce. I am glad that I am divorced however I really wish that I had handled it better in the last two years of our marriage. I was so on edge when he said ANYTHING that I couldn't respond rationally. I definitely wasn't my best self and took it out on him.

I decided to have sex. Outside of marriage. The craziest thing about it is how much it hasn't affected anything. It's changed the landscape of my entire dating situation in some ways; and in other ways, everything is exactly the same. I bounce back and forth between regretting it and accepting it. I don't believe in regret. And if having sex during this one period in my life was the only chance I had, I'm glad I did it. But it also wasn't the experience I was hoping for. And it didn't last long enough. Having access to someone where I could express my sexuality; to have someone I could touch freely, was exhilarating and proof that it is something I need and crave in my life. But now that the relationships have ended, and there is nothing on the horizon, I wonder if that was my one chance. Will I have another? One that lasts longer this time?

Gosh, this past Jewish year was full of rich experiences. Professionally, the most significant was submitting my PhD, from Thailand, almost on a whim while I was about to go into a massage session with Mike Tan. It was a massive relief, and freed me up to finally think about what I want next from my life.... which turned out to be grounding, stability, and change. The process of interviewing for, and choosing to accept, a job in finance and in NY really surprised me, and forced a huge letting go of who I thought would be and where I'd live. I'm nervously excited.

There have been two significant experiences for me. 1. I finally managed to end a long-term abusive relationship. A new friend helped me to see that my situation was unacceptable, unexcusable, and unlikely to change. This was incredibly difficult to do, and took a lot of help and courage. However, it's the best thing that I've ever done and I'm very proud of myself for doing it. I felt instant relief and quickly relaxed into being myself again. It took a lot of processing to understand what had happened, why, and how I could avoid this in the future, but I feel at peace with it now. 2. I met a new and wonderful man, and fell in love. It was relatively unexpected, and I was reasonably tentative after my relatively recent experience, but our relationship just, well, happened! He is kind, caring, and generous, and he enables me to be a better person, the kind of person I want to be. I feel incredibly positive about the future, and the sense of contentment and belonging that I feel is something I've never previously experienced. I have never felt this kind of love before and I'm very grateful.

We lost our father last November, the day before Thanksgiving. After 13 years of caring for him, God decided to take him home. I am both saddened—he was the kindest man I’ve ever known— and relieved, as his health rapidly began to decline in February 2017. I know he is in a much better place, and I am grateful to God he saw fit to bless us with such a gentle, spiritual, loving, and supportive father.

My father passed away

I actually had sex with someone who I thought liked me for me, and I thought that this could develop. It did not, and I am very sad. I feel that I will be alone for the rest of my life now. I am bewildered by this.

I got fired from a job that I think I was done growing at for a while. The amount of stress in my life in the past year has been ridiculous. The new boss that was such an asshole. The house remodel and the brother getting out of jail and choosing not to comply with rehabilitation. It’s not a wonder that death often feels like the right option. No more choices to make no more expectations to be dashed no more disappointments in general. Depression sucks balls... Am I resentful fuck yes I am. Currently, my animals are the only Things that bring me the least bit of pleasure. Not sex not the boyfriend there is no bliss in my life. I just want out.

Getting into college! Obviously excited at first, got to college SO SO overwhelmed and stressed, totally settling in now and it's really fun!!! Hurricane coming this weekend though so....that's concerning. I'm grateful and excited for what I have/what's to come! Definitely an adjustment though....

This year, just two months ago, I met Clay. Before meeting him, I started listening to blog posts by Jason Silver, a dating coach. I started to see how I was always giving guys a pass and how I wasn't being true to myself in relationships and then was always surprised as to why they never went anywhere. It's so different with Clay. We can both be ourselves around each other and even when we disagree on things, the conversations have been very easy. He's a gentleman, he can fix a car, he is politically conscious, he is active, he is generous and he is very intelligent. All the things I wanted - in a package that is unexpected. I am grateful for having met him. And regardless of how I feel about him at this time next year, he has changed my mind about dating and love.

My daughter went off to college. I know she is ready but I also know it wont be a picnic. I am grateful she was able to go to the school of her choice and excited about all the opportunity she has in front of her

I met my Brian! I feel so grateful for meeting him. Almost a year later I see that he has been such a mirror for me. I can better see my future, I can see who I am, what I can work on and what I want. I'm so relieved. There were certainly days I didn't think it would happen. He makes me want to be better and I'm inspired to see us grow - and to see me grow individually too, because of his love.

Friends loss of her marriage, sister, and husband. it has made the ground under me seem less stable, and at the same time made me want more time to spend on things that matter. YEs, grateful, relieved, inspired.

This past year, I reached the point of having had enough of letting my husband walk on me. I started speaking up for myself more and calling him out when he was condescending. I've also started questioning him on some things he fusses at our daughter about. ("Why does it bother you if she listens to music/sings while doing homework? Yes, you're working, but you've also said that what you're doing doesn't take much thought or attention and that you're usually watching TV or playing a game while doing it." He didn't like that but he quit fussing at her as much - he still doesn't understand how she can sing and do homework at the same time. I kind of understand. I suspect it's an ADHD brain thing. Whatever it is, though, as long as she's getting it done and doing it well, I really don't care what she does while she's doing it! What just occurred to me, though, is that it wasn't that she was disturbing his work--she was disturbing his TV watching. Marriage: He thinks we're fine. I don't think we are. In the past, I've not been specific in what I want or expect. This time, I got specific. Again, he wasn't happy about it but came around and we're getting better. Then I spotted the trend - I confront, he's upset with me initially but thinks about it, does what I've asked and, "Huh... you were right." It's rare that I actually hear that phrase. It's more his actions that tell me he's figured out I was right.

My father died. It changed everything. I feel lost, sad, angry, broken but finally also hopeful. I finally believe some good things are yet to come.

Traveled to the east coast of Canada with my 2 daughters and significant other. I was so very grateful to be able to see that part of the country and see the beauty of the country side.

My diagnosis of epilepsy became far more intense this year to the point that it had obviously impacted my work. It is meant, essentially, losing the ability to do my life's work. I am a bit of all of the above except for inspired. It is likely that a good deal of the impairment - concentration, memory, understanding instructions, etc - is medication related, however for the same reason I may have lost my ability to renew my license. It is a gigantic loss. I am sad and discouraged and angry at myself. I am upset with how it all went down with the supervisor at work, how true it all was, how hard I've been trying and the fact that I, despite all of the very hard work I've done to do my job, I couldn't do it. I'm too used to being a smart and capable and alive person. And I don't feel like any of those things anymore. I am relieved to stop having to work so hard. I am lost without the part of my sense of self that is related to my profession and has been a part of me all my life.

I had an unexpected injury that completely changed how I expected the following three or four months to unfold. Some very wonderful first responders and nurses took care of me, something which I've never had happen before. I'm very appreciative of their efforts for a stranger. The flip side is a little resentment about the effects the injury had on my life, but overall it just made me work harder to get back to where I wanted to be.

My divorce. The gaslighting. The lies. On Oct. 9, 2017, I finally said I wanted out. By the end of the month, she had moved out. Weeks later, she started dating someone new, and is still with that person. On Dec. 31st, 2017, just before midnight, I saw Sonya's text saying she was experiencing schadenfreude at my misery. The whole experience has been traumatic, excruciatingly painful, and a huge learning experience, to say the least. There are ways in which I'm grateful -- for the deep love I felt, for opening myself to love, for the joys I experienced, even for the piercing aliveness of the pain, for the growth (learning about my attachment troubles, stemming from infancy, learning I need to build self-compassion, feeling into my strength and independence). Almost a year later, I'm still in a lot of pain at times. But I'm also so much better, stronger, more clear-sighted, more able to focus on myself and my dreams and desires. But sometimes I miss Stacy terribly - the intimate moments, the closeness, having a person with whom to experience life, cuddle, have sex, share joys and pains. But I also remember the pain and frantic anxiety of her pulling away, the lies, the betrayals, the lack of connection, how much it hurt my self-esteem. And how her gaslighting made me feel crazy. So I am grateful not to be in the throws of all that. Grateful that some voice deep inside me, some spirit guide, helped me to break free of the cycle that was causing me and Stacy so much hurt and grief.

I recently moved (again, the 2nd time in a year). This time I am sharing a lovely house with my best friend and we live across the street from super good friends and their boys. It so peaceful, and I am so very grateful for this lovely refuge that we are establishing.

The death of Anthony Bourdain has gutted me to my core. He was my TV boyfriend and most interesting man in the world. It was absolutely inconceivable to me that he would kill himself and insisted it was some kind of auto erotic asphyxiation gone wrong and not broken hearted over that horrid woman Asia Argento. I have been toying with the idea of killing myself since 1972, so I get the lure of escaping this mortal coil, but he always talked about how lucky he was to have the best job on earth. He didn't seem like some sad, depressed guy. How could he do this to his daughter. The whole thing makes no sense and I feel very incomplete and need answers from those who knew him. I have reached out to a lot of his workmates on twitter to get their take on this and no one has responded.

Very grateful for this past summer 2018 to be able to relax and spend a lot of time with my family. Inspired to continue making them proud.

Simply, the move to our new home. I love living in Blairstown. I love having my own home on three acres of land with a garden and a chicken coop/run. I love having chickens. I love breathing the fresh air. And I love being out of the 24/7 rat race that is NYC. I think moving out here has calmed me down a little. Towards the end of our time living in NYC, I was stressed out constantly. And now I'm not. I am extremely grateful and relieved to be out here. It makes me happy.

I was recently promoted at work. I had made it known that I wanted to move up to Account Executive by applying for an open position. I was grateful for all of the support of my team lead and coworkers. I wasn't awarded that position, but everyone continued to help me grow and I was promoted when the next position opened up, only 6 months later. In retrospect, I am very grateful that I wasn't promoted earlier. It allowed me to be introspective of my abilities and my desires and the later position was a better fit for me and my career.

Wow, my dear sweet Yaakov moved back home to MI to go to school. How has it affected me.. well it’s been just 3 weeks since he has been gone. I am grateful that he is well and on the right track. I am grateful that he still values and excited about education. I am grateful that he has been able to go for it! I am grateful that I have thus far been able to pay for his education. I am relieved that he went to school finally.. it has released in me a desire to tell my story. But also it has allowed me over the last year to take back my life and rise up and do my own thing. I am inspired by his flight from the nest to find my own flight and do something awesome!

No surprise here - having George was the most transformative experience of last year, indeed, of my entire adult life maybe? It made me feel strong. Confident. It made me feel more comfortable with myself. It made me love more. Charlie, George obviously. Myself. All people. Everyone was once a little baby pulled out of their mother. Everyone was loved that way once. It made me think of life in a different way.

I actually don't remember anything significant that happened in the past year, but something that happened before that, that has profoundly impacted me, is that my beloved (grown) son stopped talking to me. It has made me feel deeply sad and unable to do anything to change it.

Having to stop working because of poor health. I was sad but I also didn't have the energy to fully feel it and process it - there weren't as many tears as I expected, seeing that I was giving up something I really loved. I suppose I just knew it had to be done - it was the right thing to do, and that made it a bit less painful. Not working has had a significantly positive impact on my health. But I don't feel any emotions about this. Not working is giving me a different perspective on how to live. I am more in the moment than thinking about the future. I am more interested in the slow things in life: plants and cooking. I am able to stay in touch with what my body needs, and act accordingly. I have the time I need to look after myself, and not make my health worse. I have new insight into what it means to be disabled and unable to work. I am grateful for these effects.

My parents were flooded out of their house by hurricane Harvey. It was crushing to watch my dad pace around his yard, heaped taller than his 6'4" frame, with the soggy mess of a physical life. Worrying that something important was inadvertently discarded. Thinking what could...should...could we have saved? I have felt more grateful for my upbringing and privileges this year. Things don't matter a lot, and yet things help us connect to the past; the purging revealed that. Memories flooded as swift and deeply as the flood waters. Because we saved family quilts and many photos and documents, I have not been fully disconnected, tested or deprived of all physical connections to the past. My parents were never physically in danger (out of state at the time). They lost every single piece of furniture, clothes, appliances. They lost the independence of living in a home of their own. And for the first time as adults, they lost the ability to feel in control. They are lucky, they are so very lucky. They know that and appreciate it, but naturally it is still hard when you are 80. In the end, I am simply sad.

I lost my dog of 12 years. It's been almost 5 months and I still miss him every day. While I'm relieved that neither of us is suffering the difficulties of his last 6 months during his illness, I also feel so guilty about the moments when I resented how hard it was and for not savoring every moment with him during those tough months. I've found it amazing how much of my identity was tied to him, both the idea of us as a pair and also the idea of myself as a dog owner. So that's part of what I have lost as well.

J'ai divorcé. Cela m'a soulagé, régénéré et ma permis de me retrouver

I graduated from college with a Bachelors of Arts in Political Science in May. I feel like this was a huge moment for me as now I begin the rest of my life in the work force. I'm a mixture of emotions about it. I'm grateful I had the opportunity to go to college and obtain a degree. I'm relieved that I made it out of college in four years. I'm nervous about what my next steps are. I'm sad that I'm leaving behind so many friends and memories at that university. I'm inspired to make my next step even more influential. It's a big change, and I have a lot of feelings about it.

The birth of my, our granddaughter Logan Grace. Having had two daughters I knew from a parenting perspective what to expect but “grand parenting” is even better. She was a BIG baby at 9 pounds 12 ounces and while I have no idea how uncomfortable it could be to birth a baby I know noe look at her and MY baby forgot birthing HER baby... what a SPECIAL exoeriennce...

So I have two, because I am the most extra. First one: the experience that basically spanned this whole year was the relationship and ending of it with scotty. It was so wonderful and so horrible at the same time. It built me and broke me in ways I never imagined possible. It made me realize that I have a large capacity to love. It made me realize that I want a partner and a family and a home and that none of those things were available to me in the life that I built in new york. And when it ended, god, I realized how much I cared because I was so broken. I was so sad. I cared so much. That is a beautiful thing. From that experience, I promised myself that I will only ever be with someone if I can give myself over that fully. I will not settle for less. The second experience was moving to LA. I decided I was leaving in a week. I left new york and my whole life a month later and hit the ground running. Now I'm here in a new city, in a new experience, with new people, a renewed sense of commitment to my dreams and goals and passions and heart. I'm dating women for the first time ever. I'm living my life out loud. I am creating a day to day existence that makes me proud.

I took a baby step to address my mental health - I admitted to my doctor that I was suffering from depression and anxiety, and still rocked from postpartum. So I got on zoloft and I am a whole new person! It's still not rainbows and butterflies everyday, but it's a hell of a lot better than it was and now I feel much more capable of tackling my day to day. And I'm happy more often than not, which is really something.

David broke up with me and I remain heartbroken 10 months later, unable to let go of the dream of this relationship and what could be. His disappearance after we reunited has shaken my ability to trust people, and made me resentful of male behavior, and yet I still find myself comparing everyone to him. Picturing his face is the greatest source of joy for me.

It has been a year full of significant experiences, from depression and isolation after moving to a new place, 2 thumb surgeries and 6 months of perceived helplessness, to victory over my fears, and an unexpected 3.5 months taking care of my father - and learning so much about him - and myself - in the process. I initially resented the things that were happening, but now am grateful for the growth they provided me. I feel a greater sense of clarity and purpose. And while I still have a lot of fears to work through, I finally feel like I actually can do it and move forward. I feel a lot more free and hopeful than I did a year ago.

He proposed on April 1st, 2018. I knew it was coming, but I didn't know in the moment... And sure I had a slightly emotional reaction and my hands were shaking, but the real change unfurled slowly, as each day passed. The fact that I'm known and loved - so perfectly I didn't even know I was allowed to ask for someone like him - has sunk deep into my bones. In a way, it gave me more to fear... Imagining losing him is severing a part of my own soul from myself. But being engaged? Waiting patiently for the day I'm fully his and he's fully mine? It's what spring does with the cherry trees.

The last year has been eventful. I got engaged to a wonderful man and started to plan a future with him. Things fell apart shortly before we moved and had to sell our house (the house I grew up in). We moved into separate homes and tried to stay together. It was at this time he decided he wasn't ready for the future we'd been planning and we broke up. That was two months ago, and I was devastated. The hurt is lessening, and though I still love him, I'm starting to look forward to what's coming in my future. I don't know what that is, but I'm working on myself and feeling better about who I am and what I can offer my loved ones.

My son was diagnosed with dyslexia this year. It caused a lot if different emotions and reactions. Gratefulness to understand the root of his challenges with reading. Frustration with the school for their slowness in diagnosing him and lack of immediate resources for helping him. Now I have an appreciation for the gifts that come with dyslexia in addition to the challenges that come with it.

We got married. I feel relieved. and reaffirmed. It feels like a weight is lifted and I'm not so worried about my parents being worried--in fact they seem so happy to have met my partner's parents and are excited to have grown their family. They were also impressed with the craft by which I pulled it off so quickly. My goal is to forgive the frustrations of the planning (my fiance not having enough time to help me, pushy caterers, the teasing about my gender-neutral requests, being too exhausted to enjoy myself) and focus on the wonderful circle of friends we have. It was awesome to see how everyone connected even though they were meeting for the first time. I know not to compare my relationship to others, but I am really lucky. Of course things aren't perfect, but Alex lets me be who I am, which is all I want. And, as I get older, realize is actually pretty rare in a man. Even Quinn, who hardly knows me, noted he must be something to let me do things my way. I guess I always assumed that this is how it should be, but it's not so for everyone. Girls like me are often single (not a bad thing) because they don't take shit from anyone. I am inspired to learn him more and build a life together in which we can continue to explore and grow. I'm so grateful to him and to my parents who have always supported me in my unconventional ways. I'm so grateful that my mom let me tie-dye our chuppah cover in her kitchen. I am lucky to do things on my term and feel like another goal is to make sure I do EVERYTHING else in my life on my terms. Honey badger style. However, the wedding brought up a lot of emotions for me--on being counter-culture, on being feminist, on #metoo, on being childfree-by-choice, on our aging parent's health, on emotional labor in relationships. It made me inspired to craft more. I am really good with color. I also always put out too much food. Putting together the guest list made me realize how precious and rare my friends are and I'm neither doing a good job of maintaining my long-distance ones nor making new local ones. This is something Alex and I have to work on.

I went to Switzerland for the first time in two years to visit Jennifer and her family as well as to go on a vacation. There were many irritating, annoying moments being with family but when I finally went out on my own I missed them and felt lonely, but it was good to be myself too. I am grateful that I got to go. This time I didn't even touch my savings. I only used money that I had earned from summer jobs. It was a relief to be in Europe again and to be around nature. I was also relieved that the two youngest remembered me. What made me resentful was babysitting Hafiz -- so mind numbing -- and feeling that I had to stay in their home. If I hadn't of travelled I would have had about $8000 extra so maybe I should continue to work summer school.

I turned 50 this year. Prior to my birthday, I went to Kauai with my mother. It was one of the most beautiful places I have ever been. For my birthday, I held a cocktail party with some of my closest friends and family. It was so much fun and I felt so beautiful and happy. In April, I joined Weight Watchers to help me to take better care of myself. These three events are intertwined in how I see myself and my relationship to the world.

I finally moved to Miami, got my Tennessee license, am teaching in my own classroom of Kindergarten. I'm really happy that I moved to the beach. I love the water and an grateful I finally did my life dream!

I hit a year of being at goal weight. I have never done this ever before in my life and it's thanks to Bright Line Eating. I LOVE that program. It got me into a right sized body and I now feel (and have for a while) as Susan Peirce Thompson's subtitle of her book states "Happy, thin, and free." It's the free that is the most important. I am not thinking about food any more. My mind is clear and my body doing great. I am so very very very appreciative of the program, the support system and my own determination and ability to finally find something that works!!! I feel like this is me now. It is my life, my way of being. I am relieved, inspired and hopeful for the future! I completely expect that next September I'll be celebrating 2 years of being in "a right sized body!"

I stayed in one home for the longest since I lived with my parents, more than 20 years ago. I hit that milestone, then I left that home and that city and my job and my boyfriend. Now I live in a small rural town, reduced my living expenses ten-fold and feel the most free I’ve ever been. Plus, I still go back to visit and get the good parts, but leave before it gets hard and expensive.

I started taking an anti-depressant. I remembered who I was. I remembered I love movement and exercise. I let go of my anger and rage. I became a better parent and partner. I got a job somewhere I love. I got my life back. I found my joy again.

I fully transition to male this year. I had top surgery, started T, and changed my name legally.

The biggest experience of the past 12 years has been the birth of my granddaughter, Olivia Tessa Seiber. She is a delight, and I have loved becoming a grandfather. Olivia’s birth has engendered strong feelings of gratitude, and it has inspired me to try and live my life more on my terms. I have stated the clear goal to me team of spending Friday’s with Olivia starting next March when I turn 60. Olivia’s birth also reminds me that I am getting older. I am now a grandfather, and I am the patriarch of my immediate family with more days behind me than ahead of me. I am aware of my limited time, and determined to spend it in ways that add joy and meaning to my life. Olivia’s birth has also changed my perception of my Rachel and Felipe. I have thought of them for adults for quite some time, both because they have been and they act like adults. But becoming parents is a new phase of life, filled with more responsibility, more work, and more meaning and joy. I am hopeful their experience with Olivia will be as satisfying as mine has been with Rachel and Daniel.

Three week vacation in Portugal, Northern Spain, and Bordeaux. Great opportunity to explore, see new things, and get to be a little kid again discovering new stuff everyday. Also, fun to learn how to deal with everyday things like buying a tram ticket, buying gas, and paying tolls on the highways.

My wife and I bought our forever home, and then my father moved in. And I committed to my encore career. Interesting, when I retired at 57 I felt ahead; I thought I would have my 3rd act figured out in 2 years and that by now, 6 years in, I would be in full swing. Instead, I delayed and delayed. I'm not sure if that was a necessary process for me. Perhaps so, because it inspired me to coach women through this same transition. To give them what I didn't have: a process, a support, connection, a tribe. Now I am finally creating that, but first I had to release what held me back, to revisit the emotions of childhood trauma. I'm grateful for this year of growth; grateful that I can be present for my father without the crushing resentment of duty.

I moved to a new city and worked for 3 months and was very successful. I feel more in control of my life, especially financially. I feel empowered and worthy in a way that I have not before. I am aware of so much opportunity now, that I am a bit aimless. Feeling like a powerfully bolstered sailing ship that doesn't have a navigator beyond "around that whirlpool". Wondering widely at the suddenly smaller, flatter world.

The most significant experience this past year has been retiring from my position teaching elementary school. It has come after much reflection, prayer and doors opening up that I would not have imagined a few years ago. I have felt that I was not "on top of my game", I was struggling to manage student behaviors (my student teaching was not adequate in that regard and I've always felt I was catching up), and at the age where I didn't want to "reinvent the wheel". I am relieved and grateful to have the opportunity to do other work on a part time basis and have time do things at home and have a life outside of work. I was so tired of the late nights correcting papers and Sunday afternoons doing lesson plans. The opportunity to do something different is energizing, if not inspiring.

In the last year I moved half way across the country to start a new job in a city I'd never visited before. It was a big change because I left classroom teaching for informal education but it was something I knew felt right. I'm so much happier in this job so even though I am far from home I know it was the right decision at this point in my life.

My Dad was diagnosed with advanced and aggressive prostate cancer. He and my Mum came to New York and were here for about a month as he underwent prep for surgery and then had the surgery and recovery. It was precious to me to have that time with both of them and to be able to be there for my Dad. I feel I have got closer to my Dad through this experience and that he has become softer and kinder. It's inevitable I think that an experience like this would lead you to be more present in your daily life, more loving, more appreciative of every moment you have. The treatment went well and so far he seems to be in the clear - so in the end, I feel we have all grown both has individuals and in our relationships because of this. I still fail to comprehend how I will ever process losing my parents. Especially my Mum. I was reading an email from her this weekend. A short and very loving message. And I felt simultaneously so much love and also so much loneliness and fear for what will happen when she is no longer here. I hope that day is very very far away for I do not know how I will ever bear it.

I slipped on loose rocks while hiking on a downhill trail in Israel. I fell over the side of a hill and rolled. I fractured my tibia and fibula in eight places and had to fly home by myself and then schedule surgery at which time I received a titanium plate and 20 screws to hold my bones together. I am about six months in on healing and I’m getting better slowly. This was an experience where I was able to gather support from friends and people I knew and people I didn’t know to help me. It’s given me time to think about the meaning of rest recuperation and healing and it triggered a lot of grief because some people were not able to show up for me. It triggered a lot of vulnerability. It’s given me more of an appreciation of what it is that I can do physically, and an understanding and respect for my own limitations.

Quite unpleasantly significant in a long string of significant unpleasantness was my Uncle dying mid-winter. It follows the death of my grandmother by two months, which seems to have affected me less, and even more consequentially, follows the death of my father sixteen months ago. My uncle was my dad's only sibling, and perhaps the only steadily kind and loving adult male in my childhood. While my relationship with my father was complicated and significantly transformed towards the end of his life, my uncle was steadily warm and affectionate towards me, all the infrequent times I did see him. The distress of losing my uncle, though painful alone, prodded into the more intense sadness of childhood loss. My model of masculine love was a man I saw once or twice a year with kindly eyes, who pinched my cheeks with a 'shayna punim!' by way of expressed adoration. I knew him very little as a person and did not keep much contact with him as an adult. My emotional reaction to his death surprised me. My grandmother didn't rouse very much emotion at all. She was a brilliant, but cold woman who showed very little interest in me as a child or an adult and had limited connection and abundant contention with her own living children. She was more a symbolic person of significance than a breathing, living one to me and so the lack of true mourning did not confound nor induce any guilt by it's absence. The eruption of pain and loss at the reality of my uncle's death brought with it the cycled buried and dug-up longing and desperation for uncomplicated, affectionate parental love. Saying goodbye to him was forcing my attention back on that little love starved girl in me that recognised the power of a force she could neither evoke in others nor rely upon. And with it the often battled acceptance of that same powerlessness as an adult. But in those unwelcome recognitions comes a sense of triumph, however challenged the accomplishment, in that my young recognition of the power of validation ignited the capacity and eager desire to love without reason and to value what is ignored. It's dramatic, perhaps, to allow a nod against neglect to garner credit in the creation of an internal drive to love what isn't loved, and to admit that this drive is very essential to my sense of self. But my uncle had an indispensable role in arousing it in me, and it's a valued potent force turned inwards and towards others. The uncomplicated act of giving a small shit and of unsolicited appreciation in simply existing gave me a powerful enough kick to want to reproduce it. It's a powerful memory and it's a powerful thing to remember an uncle for, who did pretty much what all uncles minimally and sometimes primarily do.. pinch a cheek and tell you you have a pretty face.

I donated peripheral blood stem cells (basically bone marrow, but a different donation process) earlier this year, potentially giving some a second chance at life. I felt surprisingly indifferent afterward - I recognize the impact of the sacrifice I made to help a stranger, but it still kind of feels like no big deal. It's a little surprising, but I also think this reaction has been instructive, a reminder that doing a good thing is not any less of a good thing if you aren't praised (by yourself or others) afterwards - feeling good about doing good things is a fair enough reason to do them, but good things are always worth doing, if only because they seem like the right thing to do.

I was bit by a copperhead snake 1 1 days ago, right at the beginning of my bachelorette party. It has been a humbling experience, helping me to be more realistic about situations (particularly those I don't like or welcome), more accepting of my present moment experience, more ready to receive and solicit help, and more grateful for the loving support that is my life. Don't get me wrong; most of this experience has been scary and not fun. I've often wished I didn't feel so sad or frightened or inclined to obfuscate my distress with humor. I'm not perfect, but I am learning. It is this learning opportunity that I appreciate.

I left my job because of the lack of recognition. So I'm feeling resentful. My new boss decided to change nothing... and I can't keep "delaying my life". Even with all this going on... my relationship with my boss became a little messy...attraction and illusion... He played me (or I let him play me) in both matters... I also lost the place I used to live, my rented apartment is for sale now. I'm feeling grateful for all my friends that are helping me during these troubled times. I'm still feeling hurt. I'm afraid of going after what I want.

I simultaneously loved a man AND accepted that I couldn't be with him. We later did get together, but the luck and joy I share with him today could only happen after I had let go.

Over the past year I visited Israel twice, both drastically changed my relationship to the state. While leading birthright, I had a realization that I could actually lead a shabbat service. During my time in a yeshiva, I learned how deep Jewish text can go and that I've got a lot to learn. I'm so grateful for this experience and I want to continue to wrestle with Israel. I'm inspired to dive deep into Judaism.

A significant experience this year I suppose would be the fact that I've been more involved in various aspects of the church. I've been active in VBS, the Youth Rally, and Open House as well as the nursery and bus ministry. It makes me feel useful and more there in a way. I feel more included in my church family.

Probably the most significant experience I have had in the last year was my medical transition. After denying my identity for years, hiding it from my friends and family, and waiting months for an appointment, I was so happy to finally start to make my body one with who I was, and I haven't questioned my decision to take hormones once. It has made me so much happier than years of depression made me think I could be, and in addition to making me more comfortable with my body, I believe it has made me a better person.

My business grew and I was even able to start taking a small income in May of this year. I have been incredibly grateful that I can earn a living by doing what I love. I did not anticipate how much I would enjoy meeting with clients and helping them! I am inspired to continue to grow my firm and hopefully begin taking a higher salary in 2019!

I went into the hospital in January of this year. I had extremely low blood pressure, fever, stomach ache, falling/balance issues, and a really, really bad headache. The doctor's thought I had an infection. They never did find the source of what they said was sepsis. I believe this happened for a reason. In December I let 2 young LDS sister missionaries into my house. My objective was to try to reason with them, and explain that my beliefs as a Christian and follower of Christ are the only way to go. That isn't just because I believe in them, it's because Jesus says so in the Bible. Instead, they almost persuaded me to join their church. I really wanted a church that would let me serve the best way I could, and accept me for who I am, and not just throw me out of the way because I'm blind. My first church had the best of intentions, and I eventually got to help with the Sunday school class, something I really enjoyed! The missionaries nearly persuaded me that I wanted a church with connection and intellectual teaching, and not a place that challenges both the mind and the spirit. I was about to be baptized into the Mormon church at the end of January, but since doctor's had to run a bunch of tests and I still wasn't fully recovered, that stopped the baptism, and I thank God it did!

This past year I was nominated the teacher of the year for 2019 for my elementary school. This put me in the running for city teacher of the year and though I did not get that far I was inspired to try harder. I am very inspired to be a better teacher and to improve upon my teaching style. That I was recognized as an exemplary teacher by being the teacher of the year I realized that I have been doing a lot right in the classroom and that I need to continue to reach high expectations for myself as an educator and to have high expectations for my students as well.

i graduated from MIT!! i brought up my term gpa from a 3.5 freshman spring to a 4.8 senior spring. i poured everything i had into these last four years, and became a stronger person in every way. there's a part of me that's super relieved to be financially independent, have more free time, and to be working toward projects instead of grades. but there's also a part of me that's sad and scared to leave the close friends i made and the structure of school.

I was pushed out of my full-time job, with the CEO using the marketing manager as a puppet. She basically fired me then said she didn't. So I quit. It was an awful experience, but I know it was for the best. I could not find happiness in that role and in the office culture. I am relieved and inspired to do more, be better and have a real impact for the greater good. There is so much to be grateful for, and I am feeling motivated by my gratitude practices and yoga.

I found out I am pregnant! Although it's exciting because it's my first pregnancy, I was actually quite apprehensive about it at work due to the amount of people who were already pregnant. I felt a bit embarrassed about it because of the way people had reacted to the other pregnancies. In my personal life, though, it's been exciting to tell people - I'm 12 weeks now, so into my 2nd Trimester! Yay!

In December 2017, we found out that my husband's prostate cancer had metastasized to one of his lungs. I was numb from the news for a few days, but once that numbness faded, I felt devastated and angry. Angry because I felt (and still feel) that some treatment choices the doctors made were based on a desire to experiment; he is not the average-aged patient as he was much younger (by some 20 years) than the average patient diagnosed with prostate cancer.

I suppose a significant experience of the past year was beginning my studies as a Family Nurse Practitioner. I am extremely grateful to be on this new journey. I'm excited and scared and invigorated. I'm proud of my decision to stop the first program after two classes and switch schools to find a better fit, one that would better prepare me for practice, even though I couldn't transfer either of my classes.

My father's death has been the most significant experience for me not just this year but my whole life up to this point. The aftermath of his death is still so fresh - only 2 months ago, but this whole year has been consumed by his sickness - worrying about him, focused on the minutiae of the treatments, and also simultaneously in a state of anticipatory grief / denial about his impending death. His decline and his death affected me greatly. I've felt every feeling I think there is - all the good and all the bad. Right now, I'm just very sad. Very very very sad. I miss him so much it hurts sometimes. I wish more than anything that he were here this Rosh Hashanah and his absence is so painfully palpable. In the immediate aftermath of his death - I did feel a strong sense of gratitude which I want to remember and hold on to this year and beyond... gratitude that I had such an amazing father and such a special connection to him; gratitude for all he's taught me and given me; gratitude that I lived in the same city as him for the past 4 years and got to spend a lot of time with him, especially this past year (though still not enough in hindsight); gratitude that I got to be with him during his final hours and tell him how much I love him and that he doesn't have to worry about me anymore; gratitude that I got to hold his hand and usher his soul into its next chapter.. With all that gratitude, I felt a swell of euphoria and pride, feelings which have since ebbed away in the tides of mourning, but I want to try to hold on to them and refocus my sadness towards them. In all I've learned about him since he died, I have been deeply inspired by all he did with his life and what a huge impact he made on this world and on so many people's lives. It's quite daunting to begin to try to live my life now in a way that honors him.. a life that is full of intention, meaning, presence, spirituality, depth, reflection. This is what I want to focus on for this new year.

Ha. Wow. A "significant experience that has happened in the past year." Jesus. Pick one. I got pregnant in November. I found out while I was in Orlando shooting for Ernst and Young though I didn't take a test and confirm it until I got home. Which caused a huge blowup fight between Michael and I because I found out the day before he left for Vegas for Daniel's birthday so of COURSE I was just trying to ruin his vacation. No. No. Wait. I'm not resentful. A little angry about it still? Yep. But truthfully he had every right to feel as though I always swooped in just as his life finally started taking off for himself. In December I had an abortion. In August, my baby was due. THAT was a significant experience. How did it affect me? Well, I'm angry. I'm sad. Yeah, I'm a little fucking resentful becauseI didn't really feel like I truly HAD a choice in whether or not I was going to keep the baby. Am I grateful? That I had an unplanned pregnancy and then an abortion? What the fuck kind of question is that. NO I AM FUCKING NOT GRATEFUL. I wish I never had to endure that. Am I grateful I don't have a one month old baby right now? I don't know. I don't know when I'll know for sure. Some days it feels like the best choice. Some days the grief and pain of that loss is too much to bear. Do I feel inspired? No. Yes. I feel inspired to implement fail-proof birth control. To never be in that situation again. That women's healthcare is where it is today. That I HAD the opportunity to choose abortion. Resentful? Yep. You betchya. I'm fucking resentful. No. Strike that. I'm fucking angry. I'm fucking sad. I'm GRIEVING her while grieving Michael and DRL and my kids full time and my career and MYSELF. I never asked to be here, but I got myself here nonetheless. I haven't stopped drinking since the day I learned she existed. Yes, SHE. I got shitfaced every single night after I found out as a way to convince myself I couldn't keep her. Self-sabotage at it's finest. Everything I do, I do WELL, that's for sure. I fucking excel. All. IN. All ways. Always.

I handled a potentially dangerous situation with a tenant calmly and well, and navigated the aftermath the same. Because there is still something of a threat, and because the only tools available to deal with it further involve the criminal "justice" (sic) system, I am still both apprehensive and sad & angry. But I am pleased with how I handled the situation, and grateful for the support I received from management - and for the conversation I had with them afterwards, because that helped them see that they had not been being supportive overall, which has me feeling reservedly hopeful that they will be more so in the coming months (the new person in one of those positions is already helping create that change)

Fell in Berlin on vacation - it was a horror and took 6 months to heal from during which time it hurt and my mobility was impacted. Not grateful, not quite resentful, simply bummed that my vacation that I had looked forward to for so long and spent so much money on was a waste.

having the big heart to heart between Jess/I and my parents. I am grateful it happened and am grateful that both Jessicas helped me leading up to and after.

This year has been chaos. I returned home from an amazing trip to find that a vast array of items had been taken from my house. I was told they were taken by the electricity company, however as the year wore on I have unravelled that my now ex-partner , who was supposed to be sick, was actually a Crystal Meth addict and that all the items that had been going missing from my house were neither stolen or removed from the house but they were taken by here and sold to Cash Converters or some other pawn shop for cash. Alternatively, she jus traded them for cash so she could buy more drugs. I am relieved she is no longer in my life, but equally bit resentful that she has undertaken such a huge deception over such a significant amount of time. She has been move on from my family home, we are pressing charges for everything she stole and hopefully, the outcome will be that she gets help so this addiction she has can be treated. My daughter has been amazing and I now have a fantastic new job. I will grow and learn from this but I am not happy that I was unable to identify this fraud as the fraud they were.

Being there for Bennett’s (my sister’s youngest baby boy) birth was by far the most incredible thing I’ve ever seen. To watch a little life be brought into this world was breathtaking. I barely made it back to the hospital room in time. I ran so hard to get up there after my brother-in-law texted me “Hurry!!!”. I almost missed the birth but made it just in time. I cried as Bennett was born. My life will never be the same.

I got engaged in October. It's a significant experience to share your life with a partner. It's affected me because I'm sharing my life with a soul mate. It's not all about me anymore and it's someone that I care and love for. I'm grateful that I've found someone that loves me. I'm relieved to not be looking for a soul mate anymore. I feel no resentful. I'm inspired to share a life with a partner and see where life takes us

This year, I graduated from college nearly 9 years after finishing high school. I felt relieved and extremely proud of my long-awaited accomplishment.

I am humbled. This job at Xero has proven to be a step down and in a different direction. I had a choice to make and I choose to move back to San Francisco, I don’t know if it was right for the long term or just right for right now.

Five years ago I had an unusual type of stroke - very interesting - and painful. - and stopped having migraines. YAY! Recently, I started having migraines again. They were more spectacular than ever. More interesting - and also painful. Not sure why they returned. Don't know how I feel about them. Is the damage from the stroke is healing? Is the defect that caused the migraines is returning? Is the advantage of the migraines returning? Is the advantage of the stroke leaving? Is it something(s) else?

I bought an electric BMW on a whim. I didn't analyze all my options, I didn't agonize over the price. I knew I was being cheated a bit, but so what. I wanted it and figured it was a cheap gift to me. I LOVE my car.

This past May, I bought a home on my own. A three bedroom condo - room enough for me, my son, and my daughter. My husband and I separated; we sold our family home, a home I loved and thought I'd stay in forever. I still can't bring myself to drive by it. The kids and I lived in limbo for a while, renting a basement apartment in my cousin's mcmansion. Five months of cold showers, space heaters to keep warm, and no stove was almost more than I could bear. We survived it and I pulled off a successful basement Christmas - at least I think so. Finding a place I could afford on my own, including all that we needed, proved challenging, but it finally happened. After several failed offers, this one stuck! I do miss central AC and my garage, but I love it here. It's my space. I picked it. I bought it. I own it. When I'm here I feel at peace - like I'm where I should be. Buying a home on my own was terrifying, but exciting and inspiring at the same time. To me it signifies progress towards independence, and towards being brave and vulnerable. And the HOT showers....can't get enough!

Everything stressful culminated at the end of 2017 with Mike's death on December 23rd. My sister and her family had been in Italy for two months. I'd been juggling two full time portfolios at work since October, when my coworker went on sick leave. Mike managed to hang on 'til his 76th birthday on November 29th and we even had a double birthday (his, and Brianna's 17th) and Christmas tree trimming celebration at Michele's the weekend after. Brianna took the funniest Snapchat video I'll ever have of him and in it, I'm laughing hysterically at Mike's confused look. In the video, his face is superimposed on a giant, copper-coloured dancing chicken costume. It is the best, most perfect 10-second video of Mike that I will ever have. His death hit me so differently than my father's. With Mike, I only ever knew him as an adult. I never had any little girl pedestal expectations of him like I did with my Dad. And despite Mike's dirty-old-man, inappropriate ways with me, he was harmless and he only wanted me to be happy. My father was too, but it just felt messier with Dad than with Mike. My relationship with Mike was simpler. Having spent all that time with him since he found out he was sick, attending chemo sessions, scans, transfusion appointments, lengthy ER visits, then getting infections while in hospital and routinely going back to being an inpatient, we wound up talking and generally hanging out a lot. On the Wednesday before his passing, I went to his room during my lunch and sat with him. I took his bed while he sat in the chair, staring blankly at his lunch tray. He was thin and looked mad. I asked him, besides the obvious, to tell me how he was feeling: "Frustrated. Pissed off", he said. He would clench his fists and say, "I have no power" (meaning energy). "I can't GO anywhere. I can't DO anything. How much TV can one person watch? How much sleep can one person get? I wanna DO something!" I told him that it might help if he ate something, since I knew he hadn't been hungry and hadn't eaten in awhile. "I'm a goner, Aim" he said flatly. "Not necessarily"I said. "Y'know, nobody expected you to survive that infection you had. You weren't yourself. But then you did. And even the palliative care physician hasn't given you a timeline. Neither has your oncologist. Nobody once has told me how much time they think you have, and I've asked them! I truly think it's up to you: if you're tired of fighting and you're ready to give up, then I think your body will follow suit. But if you still want to fight to stick around, then I think you have that choice. We'd all support whatever choice you make, but I honestly think it's up to you. Whatever you want. But if you seriously want to walk somewhere, then you'll have to eat something, because you can't move without fuel." He looked at me earnestly after I spoke and slowly began eating his soup and then dessert. I had never felt so happy to see this man eat a thimble-sized serving of soup and ice cream, and perk up with energy... and maybe a little hope. I put on some Christmas music while he ate, and instead of getting up to walk somewhere, he gently fell asleep. I then switched the music to Aviva Chernick's chanting Hebrew liturgy, and within the hour, he woke up and asked me if we were listening to Jewish music. I told him we were and he said it was nice -- better than the TV. That day was a gift three days before he passed. How did it affect me? I lost my buddy. I lost my stepdad of 20 years. I felt lost. I didn't realize just HOW MUCH I was going to miss him until he was gone.

I don't know. I've finally decided that my staying at this job forever is not a given. That is a bit freeing, although I still don't know if I'll actually ever leave.

Is it alright if I write two? Well, I'm going to. My first was in 2018, in seventh grade. I'm in my first week of eighth grade now. I was in seventh grade chorus, and we had a rehearsal at the Arlington High School. There was the sixth grade chorus, seventh grade chorus, the select Girls Ensemble, and the select Acapella group. For some reason, while the seventh grade was performing, I just got hit by this bullet of anxiety. All I could think was "I don't belong here. I need to get away NOW." I bit my tongue as hard as I could and dug my nails into my hands to distract me from it. At the time, I thought nothing of it. But later that day, when I told my friend Kizzie about it,(she knows just about everything about mental health) she got very concerned and exchanged worried glances with my other friend. I immediately tried to brush it off, stuttering "B-but that doesn't count as... self harm. It DOESN'T." I repeated when she gave me a doubtful look. She told me to tell her the next time I ever did that. I didn't answer and felt weird the rest of the day. That night, after finishing my homework, I stared at my pencil strangely. Then, like I was a robot, I pressed the tip against my hand until I felt pain. For some reason, I was really dazed and felt mesmerized. Somewhere very, very far away someone was screaming at me that it wasn't right, but I couldn't hear it, and if I could I pushed it away. From then on, at random times, I would do it. I never even did it hard enough to break the skin or anything, but I still felt weird doing it. Finally, one day, I was kind of pushed to my limit. I felt so stressed out, I just wanted to lay down and not get up. I felt really lonely, like even though there were people around me, I had a big wall around me and no one could see me. It was near the end of the year, the most stressful time of the year, and we were cleaning out our gym lockers. My friend Ellie found a stray bobby pin in hers, and asked if I wanted it. I said yes and held onto it the rest of the day. In one of the last periods, math, I couldn't listen I was so distracted. I went to the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I took out the booby pin and used the sharp pin to very lightly break the skin on the back of my arm. It didn't even bleed, but I felt scarred. Immediately after I looked at the marks I had made on the back of my arm, I felt sick to my stomach. Some nights I just cry silently thinking of it. I just feel so shameful whenever I think of it. I feel like I disgraced myself somehow. I immediately told two of my very close friends because I felt like my shoulders would break from the weight of keeping the secret. The first was Kizzie, and she got sad and worried. I didn't like the feeling I got when I saw her face when she read the note I passed her in french class. The second was my friend Kate, who I told in math class. I gave the note to her and had to leave the room when she read it. When I came back, she said "Izzy..." and I thought she was going to cry. She had this pained expression on her face, like someone just kicked her in the gut. Her eyes were big and sad, and I was afraid if I looked into them too long I would break down. I felt so ashamed. Some nights I just cry thinking of what I did. Because I know it would hurt those I love, and I think it hurt me too. But, on a less depressing note, I had another experience that made me happy. Since one of the beginning months of seventh grade, I had a big fat crush. For months and months, I would lie in bed at night and self pity, because I "couldn't" ask her out. For many reasons. First of all, I'm too young. Pardon me, I'm looking for IZZY, yaknow, the one who wants to make the most of opportunities?! Second of all, this would be the first person I ever dated. And, the first GIRL I ever date. It seemed scary to announce my bisexuality that loudly. It seemed scary. So I didn't. Until one night, when I wanted to kiss them so much I could have exploded. So I got up and texted my close friend; one who kept telling me to take the opportunity and run with it. I texted her, "MAKE ME ASK HER OUT NOW". She immediately knew who I was talking about. She said, "YES DO IT NOW" and encouraged me until on snapchat I said. "Sadie? It's ok if you aren't awake right now, but would you like to go on a date sometime with me?" In the time in between when I sent the message and when she responded, I thought I was going to have a stroke. Then she responded "Sure" with two heart emojis. Why do you melt my heart like this Sadie??? I was so happy. And now, in eighth grade, we have gone on two dates, and every time I see her I want to kiss her. I haven't done it yet. Don't worry, I will(wink wink). So. Those are my experiences. Future self, try not to cringe so much. It isn't a flattering look. I have questions though. Is the self harm thing still going on? Are we better? And are we still with Sadie? This was a nice reliever. Like my own little therapist. Thanks, 10Q.

A signifigant experience this year was completing my BSW placement. I went into the program feeling ambivalent about whether or not I even anted to do social work. Im still a bit ambivilent, but I also feel like Ive grown so much. I know that I want to work with people and explore trauma and mental health.

In the past year, the presidency of Donald Trump has overthrown everything I believe in as an American and a Jew -- a just society that protects, rather than vilifies, its most vulnerable citizens. There is so much in Judaism that screams for social justice now.

having a gallstone attack and almost having my gall bladder removed. I was able to use herbal treatments and acupuncture to break up stones and pass them. I had to giver up alcohol and coffee for the most part, and have not had any attacks or discomfort. I am very grateful that This episode in my life passed and was resolved for the most part and I am feeling great..

This year was one of significant transition in my professional life. The bottom line is I left a job that wasn’t working for me. It’s a complicated picture. Some of the prisms that form part of that picture are: having been set up to fail, having been squeezed out by an insecure colleague, wanting to explore a different path and being savagely unsupported in that desire, having been strung along for a much longer time than was menschlech, and yet having a lot of fear and sadness about leaving and a lot of anger about being treated so badly. I now feel relieved and hopeful. Still sometimes fearful but mainly grateful that I am out from underneath a weight I couldn’t support.

I spun out, mental health wise. Lost my shit, starting drinking WAY too much, let my depression totally bring me down. I sought professional help, finally, and got on anti-depressants. Best thing I've done for myself in decades.

Learning of my husband’s love affair. It affected me more deeply than any other experience of my life. It triggered crippling anxiety and depression. It brought me back to being an abused child. I’ve started therapy for abandonment issues and discovered how much of my life has been influenced by my lifetime of anxiety and childhood abuse. I’m not greatful but as a reluctant optimist at least I’m going to become a healthier adult. I still don’t know if this marriage will survive.

Without a doubt, the most significant experience in the past year has been the illness and death of my brother. My only brother. My only sibling. I'm probably still processing its effects, but some are already clear: I am saddened by his absence; I am angry that his "last chapter" involved being in a hospital where he got less than stellar medical attention and a gradual decline that offer hope in the beginning and despair at the end. However, he chose palliative care for his final days and we were able to surround him with those who loved him, and it was a far better end than the previous several months. I am resolved to take good care of my health, do as much "death cleaning" as possible on an on-going basis, and live as fully and vibrantly as possible. It also left us considerably more affluent - also an odd experience for me.

Blast from the past. Corey contacted me and wanted to meet for coffee to tell me what an impact I'd made on his life 30 years ago and how he thinks he lived differently because of me. I think he'd have had all the same adventures had he not met me, but it was a pretty wonderful thing to hear.

In August of this year I got pregnant. It happened because of a lot of planning and thinking and changing our focus of what we want our future life to look like. It was stressful and exhausting and exhilarating. Now, I'm waiting to see what our life is going to look like after that. I keep wondering whether we've made the right decision, and I don't know that I'll ever have proof one way or another that we have.

We drove as a family to Longmont where Samuel is to begin his Masters study. Then to Longmont where Daniel starts his new adventure. It was great to see our boys take steps in their own path. For me, it was satisfying.

Well holy hell we got married on December 9, 2017! It's true what they say - it goes too fast. We took the week off leading up to it which was much-needed, but I think also gave us a little added stress and hype. Once the day came though, it was SUCH a blast. Every we love most in the world was there and it turns out, we throw an awesome party! The worst thing about it was that then we didn't get to live together. We went back to the cross-country long-distance life we'd been living for another 8 months (minus the 1 month he stayed with me in Chicago immediately after the wedding...nice but not real life). We're on the other end of it now, and (I think) stronger because of it, but I'll happily go on the record as saying that it's not a great way to start a marriage. Our marriage is for-real starting now and I couldn't be more grateful.

My mother died. It affected me greatly. I miss her very much. I didn't know how to grieve and ate - so put on at least 15 lbs. I am grateful that she died so quickly and without pain, and that I was able to go immediately to London to be with family. I am also grateful that I did the past life regression and she came to show me her love and that she is with me. I am not relieved or resentful. I am inspired by who she was and what she has left me from her life - all her wisdom, and love and caring

Dad died after a brief illness. I am grateful for several reasons, the first being Dad was old and frail and ready to go. His life had deteriorated into day after day just killing time without purpose or growth. He did enjoy our lunches I think and his bridge games at the senior center and perhaps the occasional Braves game, but he had grown weary of his existence and I know he welcomed death even as he feared it. From a personal perspective I am grateful that I am no longer responsible for his finances and his health and his morale. He had become a burden on my time and energy and even though I love him I was beginning to resent it. Even writing that makes me feel selfish but it is the truth. So yes, I think we were all relieved. I wrote both the eulogy and the obituary and facilitated the interment ceremony and celebration of life and feel like none of it did his life justice, but it was my best effort. Jay did the best with the pictures and videos. I am inspired to keep evolving and living my life with as much awareness as I can muster.

I have gotten over caring for my Dad and how he doesn't contact me anymore. I feel resentful yet relieved that I can finally get over it. I know a part of me will still hold onto that but for now I don't care.

Took my family on a roots trip to Eastern Europe. It effected me very positively in the closeness we developed over the 2 weeks together. But it left an indelible impression we all felt by experiencing the horrors of the holocaust. Thankfully that was tempered by good times and great meals.

I walked the Camino in Spain in late April/May. It made me remember to be more forgiving, to really show to love the ones I love, to be thankful for my body, and to do something adventurous.

My dad died. It has affected my life in every way—my mental health and ability to manage my anxiety have been challenged. My relationship with my mom has fundamentally changed forever. I have walked through grief of regrets, missing him, worry, sadness, feeling lost and like I had lost, happy memories, feeling like I lost someone who understood me in a way that no one else ever could. I lost my dad, my sponsor, my confidant, my protector, my comforter. It has touched every aspect of my life and who I am. It has tested my strength and heightened my ability to love and feel gratitude for those in my life. I am devestated but I am thankful for the years I had with him and that my mom is ok. I am thankful he is out of pain.

Decided to focus more on my health and wellbeing, less partying, numbing behaviours and more meditation and soul searching about what I really want.

I moved to Florida. It changed my life. I learned how to be on my own in a new place, figure out a new job, and try to make it (somewhat) on my own. I struggled through working two restaurant jobs, teaching in studios, driving all over the place, making little money at yoga. I overextended myself and learned a lesson to take care of my body (hopefully not to be repeated). I made some amazing friends. My spiritual growth accelerated. I feel like I am living my truth and my purpose and it keeps getting better and better as I stick to what feels good in my heart.

I received an incredible review and bonus in March 2018. It felt great to contribute to our family future and also be recognized for making a great contribution to our business.

Aaron - The birth of Aviv is by far the most significant event of the past year. It has inspired me to be present and to focus on him. I am grateful for his laughter and smiles. I am relieved that his birth was not traumatic for Julia and him. It was hard during the first week, but he and we have all bounced back from that experience. Juju - Becoming parents with Aaron and meeting baby Avivi. I am grateful that it has gone as well as it has. We feel so lucky to have him as our bubba, and excited for his future. While it has made me more empathetic to other parents (i have gained a new world of understanding) it has also shrunk my awareness into a little circle that exists in certain hours and only when Aviv is in certain moods.

I finally got the courage to tell my business partner that she is not carrying her weight, and I'd like to work on my own starting next year. It was a good, honest, mutually respectful talk. I am grateful and relieved. It had been bothering me for years. So I feel lighter, re-energized, and hopeful! Also a little scared because it's all on me now! I also feel empowered to have spoken up and not allow myself to continue to feel taken advantage of.

Attending the birth of our sixth grandhild last February. Even though her birth was fairly routine, she didn’t breathe well right away. For 6 minutes, my son-in-law and I observed the neonatal team providing the expert care that she needed to survive and thrive. I am indescribably greatful to those individuals for their calm competence—to my daughter for choosing a hospital birth, and to any higher power that gives us life. Remembering this experience reminds me to appreciate the miracle of our bodies and the breath as well as our extreme vulnerability.

i got a gf and I'm pretty grateful for that.

I started my coaching training, and subsequently, my coaching business. The business isn't the scary or uncomfortable part, it's the coaching part. I worry that I'm not being of value to my clients. I recognize it's not up to me to decide if my coaching is of value, it's up to my clients. I feel like I'm faking it in a way. There's a name for this, the Imposter Syndrome. Who am I to be able to guide someone and help them work through things and attain what they want for themselves? I don't have a degree in coaching. However, I have had classroom instruction and am currently going through the certification process. This work is inspiring, but much of the time I doubt myself and don't know what to do. My pleaser tendency gets in the way, and I'm doing my best to give that shit up and just go for it.

WOW this has been a year!! A lot has happened but undoubtedly the most significant experience I've had was living and studying in Japan for 4 months, and spending a month backpacking in Thailand and Vietnam. Considering I've never lived anywhere but LA, this was my first experience making my home in a new place and being truly on my own. I came to love every quiet street, every omiyage shop and market. Most importantly, I experienced a lot of this by myself. I often went out to shrines and shops alone because nobody else was free, and even though it was lonely, it didn't stop me from seeing what I wanted to see. I'm proud of myself for taking initiative and making every day what I wanted it to be. I have very few regrets from the past few months, which is honestly unlike me. I can only think of a few bad mornings or afternoons- not even full bad days. Living in a new place makes you so much more appreciative of the world around you, more excited for the mundane activities and things lifelong residents forget about. It's difficult to explain how much this experienced changed me; I don't really understand it myself, but I look at pictures of myself from the first few weeks of my trip and I just feel like a different person. And I especially look at pictures of myself from freshman and sophomore year and feel completely separate from that version of myself. I've never looked at old versions of myself like that and felt so distant. After these past few months, I feel so inspired to travel even more. It made me realize how easy it is once you just get off your ass and DO IT. I wish I could write a more poetic answer to this question but I can't even put into words how I feel. Just grateful.

There was a hostage situation at my Trader Joe's and the store manager, Melyda Corado, was killed. My circle is relatively small, but I was surprised that I didn't know anyone in the store at the time. I live here in large part because it feels relatively safe, yet someone from a nearby neighborhood brought a gun and changed lives forever. Somehow the event felt like a part of the Los Angeles I have always known. A story I read from a women inside during the incident recollected that the man who ran in the store realized that by shooting at the police he had ruined his own life forever. I'm not sure how we as a society can do better, but it feels like we should be able to. In part the incident had me contemplating what would it would like if we disarmed our police. It's difficult to imagine, but in some small way I wonder if I would feel safer. On an upside, the aftermath made me appreciate my community. I attended a vigil and managed to speak to someone else who was there alone, her name is Joe. I am grateful we could support each other.

My sister, Margery, was diagnosed with (APL), acute promyelocytic leukemia, which is a blood disease, rare cancer. Margery and I are the two youngest of seven children. This happened in June of 2018. Margery had gone to the doctor on a Friday and had medicine changed. On the next Monday, she had trouble catching her breath, and called the doctor when she got to work. Margery was told to go to a specific ER. They took blood test, diagnosed the APL, and she was admitted into the hospital. She is at home in September as an out patient. This was and is a stressful event. For 10 days, Margery was sedated in ICU room, after having a reaction to treatment (arsenic). This was a very scary and stressful time. While my sisters could travel to be with her in ICU, I stayed home and worked. My job is not as flexible as my siblings. I do get to visit my sister in a couple of weeks. However, this event in our family was overwhelming and stressful. Since Margery is better and at home, I am now concentrating again on my life. I am back in school for my last semester, which my employer is paying for. I gained 20 pounds while my sister was in the hospital. I ate comfort junk food. It was awful and I had not desire or motivation to eat anything else. Although I confided in one very close friend, I felt lonely and scared for the most of the two months. I shaved my head when my sister lost her hair. So I am (1) grateful that Margery is getting better, (2) relieved that I get to visit her, (3) inspired to lose the 20 pounds that I gained eating junk and comfort food, (4) pissed and resentful at myself for ignoring my health, (5) working on forgiving myself, (6) grateful for my friend that I have to confide in, and (7) relieved and grateful that I like my bald head and short hair cut. I also have a deeper understanding and empathy for anyone who has to shave their head for whatever reason, and put up with the invasive questions and judgements from people. Fran, is my friend. We went fly fishing up in 11 Mile Canyon. It was a fun morning. My first time fly fishing, Fran taught me. Fran inspires me, and I am grateful for her friendship and love. I do not get to see her very often. From my answer last year, I missed the Denver Women's March for 2018. However, the movement still inspires me, and I have been following politics and make sure I get out and vote, and go to town hall meetings to make my voice heard. I am still lonely, but am letting go of the attachments and baggage that I seem to hold onto. Still practicing yoga.

On November 25 of this past year, I drank for the last time. I don't want to get into details about it, but I ended up making a complete fool of myself. I was completely ashamed and disgusted with myself. And that's when it hit me: I could no longer continue like this. In the past, I had gone out of control and ended up in evil situations because of my excess drinking. I took a break for a while, and I just didn't want to end up joining a support group. I just knew it wasn't for me. Out of the blue, I found the answer to my prayers. I went online an amazing book called "This Naked Mind." After reading it, I learned how to set myself free from alcohol. For the first time, I've learned how to live without it. I can honestly say that my life has gotten a lot better. Of course, there were times when I felt tempted to drink, but I've learned to see alcohol for what it really is. I actually found sobriety at a gay nightclub in Russia (which, I admit was dangerous given the fact that the country itself is not welcoming of gays out in the public). It was difficult at first, but I learned how choose non-alcoholic beverages at the bar and how to socialize with other in another language without depending on a drink to make me "braver" or "relaxed". I even met a lot of amazing people at the nightclub and even made new friends. I realized that there is hope for the gay community in countries that aren't accepting of them. I can only pray that these countries will change for the better. After two years living in Russia, I've decided to move back to California. Everything has changed since I last saw my city, and I'm still learning how to adapt these changes. Ever since I stopped drinking, I've learned to be real with my emotions and turn to better resources for comfort and support. I've also learned to go to nightclubs just to dance and drink soda, but I've realized that nightlife isn't the only way to have fun. In fact, I've given up on trying to make friends and have people like me. I'm happy and blessed with the family and friends that I have. I'm extremely happy to be back with my parents. Even though I do miss being independent while I worked and lived in Russia, moving back to the U.S. has made me realize that I don't want to be away from my family ever again. Finally, I published my first book! I've written poems throughout the years and decided to put them together in a book which I've titled "Senses All Around." I know that it wouldn't make me rich or famous, but it was something I wanted to do. It has definitely inspired me to keep on writing and to NOT be afraid of putting myself out there. I only have one life to live, and as I'm getting older, I've realized that I need to do what I want and what I'm called to do. Living life to the fullest is the reason why I exist.

I took a writing class that was not online. I had to read my work in front of everyone. I'm agoraphobic so it was a big deal to go out to the class for weeks. Also, I was the only black person in the class, which is not unusual considering the things I'm involved in, but it was still difficult. I'm grateful I did it, though, I got great feedback on my writing and showing up led me to get on a plane and fly to England to see Crop Circles in person. I'm inspired enough to go back next year, and to apply for a writer's retreat in Italy in 2019.

I was diagnosed with uterine cancer and had a complete hysterectomy with my ovaries removed. Then I have been diagnosed with a meningioma in my left brain. I am resentful that I keep being ill, and that the doctor took my ovaries. I have been thrown into a crisis of hormones and feeling unwell and old.

Our second son was born. I feel like we have "leveled up" difficulty wise. The baby comes with all the good bits (cuddling) and all the bad bits (no sleep) that you expect, but it's really changed the way I view our older son, and for the better.

I finally got a new job! It has been a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. I do miss my old city and my friends, but being back home in Chicago at this job has been inspiring. I feel like I am back on track to being myself, I feel that I take time for myself, I have a routine, I have a more consistent social life, I have my family, I have almost everything I feel like I have been missing out on for the past two years and feel happier than I have in a while.

Going to Japan. First trip with a group. Loved the people I met. Vivien moving in as my housemate. A whole new experience. Learning a lot. Especially how to ask for what I want. Grateful. Every so often I’m resentful about the cats ruining the furniture. We’re going through drawers and closets. That is really helpful.

Two years ago I wrote extensively about a woman I believed to be my basherte; last year I wrote briefly how she unexpectedly broke up with me. I concluded my answer last year with "I remain a believer that I have the tools and willingness to be a great partner in a committed relationship." That last sentence has proved wonderfully true. I was not looking to date or for a romantic relationship, but just over a year ago at Selichot services, I was unexpectedly introduced to a woman who I had never seen before. We began dating and we are moving in together at the end of October of this year. She is a jewel in my life and I look forward to many years together.

My daughter started at a Jewish preschool. I'm surprised at how pleased I am that she is being immersed in the traditions I grew up with, and not just generic american traditions. This is triggering thoughts about how to parent in a meaningful jewish way, especially for my son who didn't have the same preschool experience.

I asked my daughter, how and why, after seven attempted suicide attempts, countless instances of self-harm and alcohol and drug abuse in the previous 2 years she had been able to turn her life around. She said " Dad, I just decided to stop being a victim...." She blew me away and reminded me that I had made a similar decision 30 years ago which led to a life of recovery from addiction and mental illness. It inspired me to change my attitude to some physical health challenges I was facing and now I too, have turned my life around again. So grateful.

I was brought in to a large project that was interesting, aligned with my goals and paid my bills. It shifted my center of effort and reduced my public publishing, but it also fed my ability to pursue my interests. Then it hit a wall and ended. Many emotions: grateful, regretful, dismayed, excited, worried.

I have had several challenging interactions at work that I handled better than I had previously. I still think about Nana, her spirit and example, which guides me. I am grateful for the ability to consider my emotions and actions more deliberately than before. But I still have a long way to go.

Therapy. Realizing I likely have anxiety. Coming to terms with the crap that has happened to me. Now, I need to find security in myself again. Allow myself to feel better about me. Allow myself to take care of my body, my vessel, my conveyance through this life. To level up. To embrace my life and the suck. And to keep taking the next step.

We decided to sell our house. It brought a lot of stress but also excitement to be in a new place with a new space. Now we are escrow both buying and selling and so far I haven’t died from the stress

Yesterday I celebrated my 40th b-day! This was an emotional day. 40 is a big number. I feel old and that somehow my youth has come to an end. yet, I feel rejuvenated. I feel like my 40's are going to be awesome and allow me to find myself as an adult and to set a new tone in my life.

In the last year I've lived in London, Bali, Chiang Mai, Melbourne, Bangkok, Hong Kong, Singapore, Tucson, Budapest and Zagreb as a digital nomad. I started two new businesses and cofounded a third. I made less money than I I ever had, while spending more than I ever had and nearly bankrupted myself... And I also celebrated 6 years sober despite it all. I've learned and grown more than I though possible and I'm 100% grateful for it all and excited for what's next. I'm currently writing my comeback story and it's a doozy.

In the past year, I struggled to aim for love from different people. I aimed for love that I think will fill the gaps in my soul. I forgot how to love myself and started losing enough sleep for months. It's still happening this year but I'm working on it. Loving each piece of myself, my imperfections, without the need of the other. I learned everything about myself from this process. I will not feel resentful about what happened in the past for what I know this is me growing.

I was elected to my local School Committee in November of last year and inaugurated on January 1 of 2018. I was relieved to no longer be campaigning and grateful that I was given the chance to serve by my community. It is significant because I am now a public figure locally, but also because I am out of the house during bedtime for my 2 year-old and 3 year-old multiple nights per week. I feel guilty leaving the kids and leaving my spouse to put them both to bed while I go serve our community.

My father died. I'm grateful his suffering wasn't drawn out like my mother's was. I'm resentful at the mess he left for me to deal with. I still haven't connected with a therapist although I know I need one. I feel like I'm juggling flaming shards of glass and failing a great deal of the time. I throw myself into other things as an escape but the house and chaos he left behind loom over me and cause unending amounts of anxiety and stress. I worry that my aunt and uncle and other relatives a constantly judging my actions and taking decisions made for the good of my family as slights against them. On a positive note though, my strained relationship with my brother is a little better. He finally had a breakdown one night after Dad died. He finally remembered some of the shit he put us through when I was in High School and for the first time in over 20 years he apologized to me and meant it. I let go of a lot of bitterness and I think I was truly able to forgive him. I don't forget but I think I forgave.

We took custody of our 2 grand daughters in Sept of 2017. It has been a year filled with a lot of emotions. Resentment? Hell yes! I'm 47 years old and spent 20 years of my life being a stay at home mom raising kids. Our youngest is 19 and still living at home. We were finally starting to enjoy life. Do things we wanted to do because we didn't have anyone but ourselves to answer to. Then we rescued our grands from horrible living conditions because their parents are drug addicts and choose drugs over their kids. I think I've gone through the stages of grief multiple times this year. Extreme anger towards bios, because they refuse treatment. Disappointment and depression from the feeling of loss. Loss of my life! My life the way I wanted it, doing the things I wanted to do, having things, saving money for retirement, trips, a career, my privacy, my quietness. Its all been taken or at least placed on the back burner for a while. Loss of my daughter to drugs and street, loss of my grand children who have now become my children. Its a great loss. I think I'm in the stage of acceptance...Finally. However, I'm hesitant with this thought because I've felt like this before, only to cycle through the stages of grief again. I hope that I can regain a vision for my future with my grandkids as a primary aspect...which is why I'm doing 10Q.

A few months ago, my wife and I and my parents and aunt and uncle received a special recognition from our synagogue as volunteers of the year. None of us wanted the recognition, and would have declined the honor if we had been singled out. It wasn’t until the week of the event that I realized the magnitude of the event and started to embrace it. The organizers made it into a big deal. Our state representatives and Congressman were there and more than 200 people attended the brunch. There were some surprise guests, as well as surprise speakers. Our two kids spoke/roasted each of us, and they were amazing. They had people laughing and crying, myself included. It was just an incredible experience that made me very proud of them and the rest of my family.

The world continues to hover on the brink of destroying itself and the people from Trump, to Putin to Xi Jinping and the rest don't seem to care. I despair that, as humans, we're allowing the three poisons of Greed, Anger and Stupidity to run our lives and to destroy ourselves and our world.

This year, Allie and I went to Minneapolis and she found out that she does not have ALS. I went into the trip not really knowing what it would mean to date someone that was dying, but resigned to accept it. Afterwards, I think it forced us to discuss the big questions: marriage, faith, family. We decided to move in together. She's unlike anybody I've ever dated: kinder, gentler, and better. I am so glad that we're together and she is going to be healthy.

One significant experience, which I actually had the pleasure of doing twice, was taking the LSAT. I knew it was coming, and felt confident on practice exams. But, when it finally hit on July 23rd, I felt completely unprepared. It was a difficult exam and I was constantly pressed for time. However, that feeling when you're finally done is euphoric. I took the exam again in September, and hopefully it went better than the first. I am now feeling inspired to finish this school year strong, and jump into law school.

A significant experience that has happened in the past year was starting my M.B.A. through Bard College. I am grateful, inspired, and a little too stressed about it. It's going to be a challenging 3 years, but hopefully with many opportunities and rewards.

I met my fiancé. It has affected me profoundly. I do not feel alone. I have a partner and co-parent. I am so, so grateful. I was worried about the future, my future, alone and depressed, trying to cope. Life seemed like so much work and no-one to share it with. I feel doubled in strength.

I had a major episode of depression, which led me to consult a consultant psychiatrist. I am relieved that it has lifted, but annoyed that it happened.

Well, Camp Newman burned down. So my answer from last year, about being so inspired at Porter Creek that I knew I had to come back, made me cry today. Because I was inspired, and I did come back, and I was a great dance specialist and a great counselor and it was amazing, just like I knew it would be. My girls last night texted "Shanah tovah" with a LOT of Jewish star emojis and I am again reminded of how remarkably important this job is. The resilience of our community was inspiring, is inspiring, will continue to be inspiring. But still. Porter Creek was my favorite natural place, my home, my childhood: I spent a year grieving.

I learned about an uncle that no one knew existed. We both independently did DNA tests, about 2 months apart, and learned that we are related. Turns out, my grandfather, before he even knew my grandmother, had a relationship with a married woman and fathered a child. For a multitude of reasons, this woman and my grandfather chose not to continue their relationship or get married to each other, and this little boy was raised to believe that his mother's husband was his biological father. Now, at the age of 75, he is learning about his father and other siblings and nieces and nephews, and I've got another uncle. Mostly, I'm happy. I love having a big family, and it's truly the-more-the-merrier. We met for the first time last weekend, and he's a very nice guy. His whole family is nice. I never really knew my grandfather, so I didn't have my image of him destroyed or anything (can't say the same for my dad's siblings, who are struggling with this news), but it does make my grandfather more human and real in my eyes. I didn't know him, and my dad doesn't talk much about his parents (I'll have to start asking more questions), but now I can imagine my grandfather: Being my age (early 30s), in love with someone with whom he should not have been in love, leaving for WW2 and probably later learning that his girlfriend was pregnant, dealing with the grief of ending that relationship, knowing (I'm pretty sure that he knew) his whole life that he had another son living just 15 minutes away and never telling anyone.

We built a hog barn. It makes our yard and my husband stink. But we eat a very heavy protein-rich diet.

In the past year my daughter was born, my Dad moved in with us, and my husband was diagnosed, treated and deemed in remission for cancer. I was in a horrible car accident inDecember, totalled my car, and we were penniless until our friend created a GoFundMe account for us to get us back on our feet. We have been humbled by the love and support of friends and family throughout this very difficult year. As we prepare to celebrate our daughters 1st birthday this weekend it feels like a celebration of our perseverance through an incredibly difficult and challenging time of our lives. We are so blessed and excited to move on into the next chapter and find our footing. Enjoy and love each other with our renewed appreciation for our family and children. We will try not to take anything for granted this year.

Changing jobs this year has been very significant for me. I am currently feeling some regret, and I'm pretty exhausted. I do feel like it was a move up/out from where I was, but it has not been an easy transition. What I feel most grateful for is that the move was my choice, and I felt like I was really negotiating on my own terms for the first time ever.

One of my best friends from college, who I used to play music with, moved to Denver, and we began playing music together again after 15 years of living in different cities. It has been one of the greatest joys of the last year, has filled me with inspiration, and helped give me a more focused sense of purpose and drive. I am so grateful and happy to have this opportunity to make music with a dear friend and to perform and share it with our friends here!

I was able to come off my anti-depressants about three months ago. It is wonderful and I am so grateful, I feel like a human again. I was suffering from chronic fatigue, and could hardly get through a day. I also didn't realize while I was on the medication how much my regular internal thought process was impaired, it is only with the lack of pills that I have begun to feel like myself again. However, I do appreciate that at the time I did need medication, because my depression was also altering who I was and also impaired my ability to function in a healthy way with loved ones and those most important to me.

Giving birth was one of the most significant experiences of my life. I went into it trying to curb my expectations...but even still, things didn't go according to plan. I needed an urgent c-section when they realized the baby was wrapped in her umbilical cord. It was a tense few hours but eventually she was delivered and everything was ok. I was so terrified of things going wrong! But then I got to hold her and feed her and take her home and she's just the greatest, most beautiful thing. I love being her mother even though it's been challenging to stay committed to my work, my partner and myself on top of it all.

I got engaged!!!!! Best thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life! I'm happy and in love, can't wait till wedding day and start my life with my love

On the top of my mind a significant experience was saying YES to facilitate an event for IIMHL's 500 participants in Globen's Annex. I was initially keen, it's fun to do new stuff, I'm new at work and I want to help out/show what I can do. Then fear set in and I was ready to jump ship. Though I continued and worked hard to prepare myself, practice, and re-design the experience to fit the objectives. It was hard, tiring, scary and I wasn't feeling confident. I felt relieved and proud once the event was over. Proud fo overcoming my fear, doing something for a good cause and for the difference I made.

I went to The Compact summer camp, and I am so grateful I did. Camp ended a few weeks ago and I'm sad that I haven't put the work in as diligently as I intended to upon leaving, but I still feel more energized and aware than I did before camp. Some tidbits from my postcard to myself: We had an amazing weekend. As we are, we are enough. Our asks are not impositions and they are not optional. We want things because we just do. If we never get it right, we still love still ourselves. "I am" is a powerful phrase and we should use it to affirm ourselves. Give yourself grace.

My wife told me that she’s pregnant again. I’m bitter, resentful, angry, and deeply worried.

I went to Iceland with a group of people I have never worked with in the field before. We had multiple trials to overcome, like car trouble and failing instrumentation. We all got along really well and worked well as a team. This experience was also a stepping stone for my career, so I am very grateful I was able to participate. The landscape of Iceland is very inspiring, and the work we were doing was equally inspiring for me.

Last year, it was the election of 2016 that propelled me into political action. This year has been such a remarkable political ride that I hardly know how to describe it. In the past year, I've written an op-ed for a major regional paper that led to my participating in a city program that introduced me how a city works. And a research project that was cut short because...well, see below. I applied for and was accepted into the Emerge CA 2018 cohort and and am now an Emerge graduate--look it up; it's good stuff. And as part of all of that, I was asked to run for City Council--which I am now doing. That's a switch! It's been a wild ride and I think it's just beginning.

The forest fire that burned everything within a 1,300 km radius of our home, when nearly 50 people burned to death. We weren't home at the time of the fire, so we were immediately grateful that our house survived the fire. Nearly one year later, the charred ground has been replaced with ragweed and none of the land has been cleared. It is no longer safe here. Gratitude has slowly been replaced by resentment, frustration and despair. We feel inspired to leave this place.

Life suddenly got interesting and "worth living"... I honeslty didn't want to turn 28 if life was going to suck any longer, but about a month before my 28th birthday, bahm... life got better... treatment did its thing and worked its wonders and here I am... 28, 2 months, 19 days... and counting :)

In 2017, my daughter was born. She has brought more joy and life into my home then anyone I’ve ever met and I’m incredibly grateful.

I guess a significant experience would be my decision to stop drinking. I had a lot of resentment about it at first because alcohol is so endemic to culture, any culture, but I'm pretty OK with it now. I've come to understand I can't have a lot of drinks, but I can at least have a couple at special occasions, which is really the only time I ever actually want to drink so it's not as restrictive as I'd first imagined.

My life continues to shape and shift and I have become more and more comfortable living alone and giving to the community in the ways that I know best - My work with the Transgender Resource Center have made me challenge some of my ideas - when you have privilege you rarely have to give thought to those who don't and how it effects their lives - for example - getting a driver's license or Passport - if you can't change your identity marker all the way back to your birth certificate (many states don't allow this) you can't get a passport - so you are trapped, can't travel beyond the walls of the United States. In light of the current President this is something I fear, as many people I love aren't safe. I am also realizing that after I engage with other people depending on the situation - my soul is exhausted and I have to retreat to my little house and recuperate. I am very thankful that I have the ability to do this - being alone is more and more appealing and I have to try and figure out why? So I am curious where this journey is taking me - what I am supposed to be doing - or am I doing exactly what this life is meant to be in this moment? I have again moved away from friends that were no longer being friends or giving me what I needed or me them - my circle continues to get smaller of those I trust and want to be with - yet my world is expanding as I continue to learn and grow and meet new people and shared experiences. What is my path - that is my real question this year? Reflecting on my journey last year - it was about finding my physical self again - I have continued on that path and am now down 20 pounds - exercise daily and hurt if I don't - clean eating and cheating when desired, clean living - I feel perhaps the strength and physical changes are a way of protecting my inner being and need to learn to let the walls down again, or do I?

Rachel and I sold the house we grew up in. This is pretty significant, as I have used this house as home base my whole life and will now be relieving myself of my life long safety net. While I do have some remorse over my decision to sell the house entirely, I am somewhat relieved to finally have the financial burden taken off my back.

I had to have an emergency appendectomy on February 1. I left work with stomach pains, drove myself to a walk-in clinic, drove myself to the hospital, and basically handled the whole thing on my own. My husband took care of the kids, but I was mostly by myself. I was proud of the way I didn't panic and was able to think through the situation in spite of the pain. I'm grateful that I had surgery before it burst, and that we have health care that allows me to handle these types of situations. It made me realize that I am more resilient than I give myself credit for.

i built a new house - from scratch, ground up. affected me in so many different ways. a mass of decisions and things i knew nothing about - that was frustrating and overwhelming. the joy of it all. the realities of my privilege.

I moved back in with my parents. In many ways it wasn't a choice - I was unemployed, having been job-hunting unsuccessfully for months. I was also severely depressed, struggling to leave the house or even feed myself. I felt embarrassed, a failure. But then I started seeing a counsellor and have finally started to wrestle with the root causes of the mental illness that I have suffered from for over half my life.

I'm so relieved to be married. After a year of crying and stressing by myself on Pinterest and Amazon and SaveOnCrafts, to finally have my now-husband and my mom and my bridesmaids realize what was on my plate and why I was stressing and stress for me instead - that was the greatest blessing. Status post marriage, I have disposable income and disposable time and lots of sexytimes. Bless.

I got a job. It completely bolstered my confidence and reminded me of how much I like being with people who share a similar passion. It also reminded me that it's ok to leave when things aren't working. It was empowering to quit and move on.

I was pregnant for the first time with a baby boy. I didn't think I was ready to be pregnant, it happened fast and at first I felt nervous -- would I be a good mom? Would I like my life as a parent? Would I miss my freedom? But as the weeks and months went on, that changed. I became so excited, so in love, so looking forward to meeting this person inside. My pregnancy ended tragically. Five and a half months in we discovered his brain had not fully developed, and were forced to make a choice. It was an impossible, devastating choice. I had become so attached to him, and still feel his absence in my life every day, 10 months later. I am deeply sad, still, but am also incredibly grateful for the people and love I have in my life. My husband, my friends, my family have stepped up for me this year when I needed them (and I REALLY needed them). I had amazing medical care, free of judgement. I continue to have the support of my friends, especially Jessie and Molly, who continue to make time for me every week and have not rushed my recovery. Josh is the strongest and most generous person I know, and if we can get through this year stronger I really do believe we can get through anything.

I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years in March. I cried, I went to the gym, I watched a lot of TV at night, I went on hikes by myself, and tried to be good to myself. I tried not to fill my life, my now-empty time, with empty social dates. I tried to meditate, do yoga, be alone and be OK. I think it was good for me. And I reached out a bit to him (texting, mostly), who also reached out to me and we clearly were missing each other. And I tried to be strong and I was, for the most part, for three months. I talked to myself, and reminded myself of why I should not be with him, why he is not the partner in life I need, that I was selling myself short. That being alone is OK. I think I finally got there, in a way. I am more Ok with doing things by myself - in fact, i have noticed that sometimes I actually prefer to be alone. But holidays are hard. Memorial day was a big one, I had a great day but underneath I knew I had to really work at being Ok with being by myself on a holiday. So when July 4th came along, and I had no plans, and Joe invited me to the cabin with his mom and Stan, I said yes. And we went up there as friends, and I guarded my heart carefully and set boundaries (separate beds). But I weakened and there was an intense attraction, so intense that I was helpless and felt like I was in love all over again. But it passed and now, even though we have slowly returned to talking almost every day and being together more and more, I am free from the neediness, the fantasizing, the glowing heart of love I used to feel. As a result, he is behaving much more like he did when we first got together - lots of attention and doing sweet things. I say no quite often to his multitude of invitations. I don't expect we can sustain this, whatever it is, and I am still intending to be open to a new relationship. But I am also not actively seeking one right now.

A friend of mine lost someone who was a mom to her and asked me to accompany her to the funeral. I was a bit hesitant coz I was afraid of funerals and the thought that they would remind me of my late grandmother's funeral and the feelings I felt about that. I was more afraid of re-experiencing the pain I felt at her funeral and was scared of how I would react this time. I also had to let go of the person I always envisioned spending the rest of my life with. It hurt more than anything and it took a lot of strength to actually let go of something upon always wanted. It took a lot of strength to do it but it also hurt more than anything.

This past year I got to go on Birthright with one of my best friends. I got to return to Israel after not being there for 10 years with a group of strangers. i was so incredibly nervous for the trip, I am so much more self conscious and anxious than I used to be, which makes it hard to travel, let alone travel with strangers. But the trip was profound, it reminded me how much I love to travel and reminded me how lucky I am to get to travel. I was able to bond with my friend even more and to make new connections, I didn't go in looking for new best friends and I didn't find any but I did meet some amazing people. I am so grateful for the opportunity that I had to travel and to experience Israel again.

Jacques passed away. I traveled to be with the family for just 2 days. I wanted to be there. Looks like I'm finally understanding that human connection with family. Too bad it took Dad's death for me to realize that. I am sad that I was so deluded most of my life.

I married the love of my life. It has had an amazing impact on my life. My wife makes me the happiest man in the world. She and I have grown a lot together in our marriage as well as with God, and I fall more in love with her everyday.

The store was finally finished in October it got rented I am resentful and pissed off because I work my ass off I fell and got hurt and feel as though my cousins are all ungreatful and now I have found out that I will not see every turn in my investment for another 20 years. What I have learned is that I am not going to volunteer for doing monumental projects. Somehow I became the asshole.

My relationship with Kevin has really developed and grown. We have a clear and shared vision for our future and have developed a joint life and lifestyle. It has been a really interesting and at times tough journey. I have had to look closely at myself and learn to understand him and how he works. I am really excited about our future together!

Lost my job due to kid's repeat hospitalizations. Got a contract job. That ended, then got a ridiculously low-paying job. Moved under duress to be near low-paying job. Struggling. Thankfully, we are also five miles from our new church, which is the only good thing in any of this nightmare.

Lady Bits - from our first show to the jams we've hosted. The first show, especially, was the proudest moment of my life. I felt so so happy to have created my own group with our own style and budding friendship. I was so relieved I/we could pull it off in just a month. I'm grateful Taylor brought everyone in, inspired to do this for the queer community, and excited for more improv that brings me the same warm and fuzzy feeling for months afterward.

My first grandchild was born six months ago I am not free to give me more blonde than this little Asher Eli. I wish my mother And father were here to see him and that makes me so sad. I am grateful that he has brought all of our family together after 20 years of a Divorced lifestyle . I always adored being a mother there is nothing like being a Mimi! He is the sweetest thing I have ever had in my life and I only hope to open his eyes to the beauty of a tradition and our heritage as he grows up. Having been in the room when my daughter delivered him was a joy I have never even dreamed of.

Taking on a new team when another manager retired. It has added greatly to my workload, given me a whole new learning curve, and allowed me to get to know some more amazing people. Although it has made me more tired, I am also inspired anew to be my best for the teams I serve!

i studied abroad a few months ago in madrid for a good 5 months. it was a super interesting experience, and it's crazy that it's over and that it even happened. i had so much fun with my host family, and got to know a new city really well (giving me hope that if i end up outside of philadelphia i'll be okay). while it wasn't all rainbows and butterflies, i changed a lot and i learned so much about myself and about how i adapt to change.

January 27, 2018. Jess's work day. SUPER grateful... that day is a day that I feel like it really changed my life for the better. I wouldn't be where I am today in ALL facets of life it that day never happened. I'm a better person through and through. I've learned a lot about myself, about the orishas and about my path in life.

I went through a job search process for my boss' job, all the way to be a finalist. And then I wasn't chosen. And then, I went through another process to finally succeed. The first job search was done badly. I was not treated well and I ended up being very burnt out and disappointed. It's a surprise that I decided to go back out there (internally) so soon. But, this job is a much better fit.

In the last year, my father had a stroke for the first time. This was a difficult experience because it made me come to terms with how far away I am from my family and how little I can do in times of crisis. However, it also opened my eyes to how fragile life is as we know it and reminded me to value every moment with those I love.

I moved to Asheville with Kevin. It's been a slight rollercoaster but I am beyond grateful to be in the city I've always wanted to live in.

I moved to Israel, which is probably the biggest, most important thing I’ve ever experienced. I’m incredibly grateful, constantly inspired and overwhelmed daily by the opportunity I’ve afforded myself. It’s lead me to so many other opportunities like meeting my life partner.

My husband passed away. I felt relieved that he was at peace. I was grateful that God had answered my prayers. I felt guilty for feeling what I was feeling!

For a variety of reasons (but mainly due to a kid leaving home), Jme and I have really focused in on parenting the two remaining children in very mindful, thoughtful ways. One of the best patterns we've cemented is taking into account each child's different reality - 'parenting the child we have, not the one we might want'. We've been able to empathetically listen and respond in a way that helps the child find /their/ path, I think. I feel great about what we've been able to do and the quality of the relationships we're building with all of the children.

This year I moved out of my parents house and into my first apartment. This was a high stress issue for the year or so leading up to moving out so I do have a sense of relief, but it is also an extra layer of stress to pay rent, keep it clean, etc.

I completed 18 months of therapy in June 2018. It made me feel strong and whole to prioritize myself in that way for a sustained period of time.

My partner of 11 years had cancer. He had a huge surgery. He got through it strong, with a good prognosis, and no need for further treatment. It was exhausting and terrifying. I am deeply grateful for the support of my family and friends—especially synagogue friends. I am, of course, relieved. I am still concerned about the general anxiety he holds; my sense is that anxiety is related to the illness. And so I find that I need to find a way differentiate myself from him, allow myself to live differently, and still love him. Make sure he knows that I love him.

In the past year, I was forced to recall again and again of the bunch of events that happened in the past 20 years. And here is a significant thought: I was always thinking of "big chunks of time" relative to my total age. And the younger you are the more significant the period of time appears to be. My school years seem to be an enormous 10 years at the time of my graduation from high school. Of course, because they represent more than half of my life at the time. The past 20 years seem to be as big as 10 of my high school. All the things that happened to me seem to be within these 20 years: my carrier at the company, my yoga experience, my children growing up and leaving "the nest"... There is a room for everything: relieve, resentment, inspiration, gratitude... All of it... Shouldn't all years to be like that?

A significant experience this past year was the passing of my grandmother. She was very young for a grandmother, so growing up her and I were extremely close. While I know she is much better off now and she is no longer fighting Alzheimer’s, there is not a day I don’t think of her. In addition to losing her, her death also resulted in losing a significant other. After her passing, I got a tattoo in memory of her. Though this was not my first tattoo, my boyfriend at the time decided he could not keep putting up with the anxiety of me getting a tattoo caused. This has led me to bust out of my shell and enjoy each day to the fullest.

I got my first paid article published in NOW Magazine. I felt my heart leap when I saw it published on their website with my name on the byline. And I was profoundly emotional when I saw it published in print. It solidified in my mind that journalism is what I want to do.

A Holocaust survivor I had known for the past 30 years passed away, somewhat unexpectedly. Aaron was not the only survivor closely involved with my work and my life to die in the past year, but his death troubled me the most. A part of me feels he could have/should have fought, or that his family should have told him to fight. It's very hard to accept that it may have been his time to go. It was also hard for me, because I was out of town and unable to attend the funeral, or participate in the communal mourning with others in my organization. I miss him.

We experienced the wedding of our son, Sam, and Hannah Ward. The ceremony was held beneath a chuppah built by Hannah dad and the handyman. A quilt hand sewn by Hannah great aunts covered the heads of bride and groom. My sister Diane officiated. It was a beautiful afternoon and evening, in a beautiful setting. I feel blessed to have participated in this magnificent and optimistic simcha.

I lost my dad unexpectedly and suddenly 4 months ago. A bolt from the blue, no chance to prepare or say goodbye. It is a fundamental shift in my life. I miss him profoundly and am still in the depths of processing the physical, legal and logistical Stuff of his life. I don’t think I’ve even begun processing anything else properly. I am enormously grateful to have had him, immensely sad to have lost him and slightly overwhelmed by the implications for my own life. A death shines a light on ones own mortality - there is a lot to consider, to process, to review, to put in place. Right now, though, I mostly feel sad and tired.

The most significant experience that happened to me this year (and perhaps in the past 10 years) was my formal conversion to Judaism. I had been "practicing" prior to my conversion - I attended holidays and services, kept Shabbat - but I felt like it wasn't at 100% until I was formally converted. Our ragtag group of reform Jews, tattoo'd and pierced, showing off our elbows, still hadn't memorized all the words to all the prayers, showed up at an Orthodox shul or our mikvahs (our original location for the Mikvah had fallen through, so this shul was gracious enough to let us use their facility). I opted to go first for the Beit Din and the Mikvah, because I knew I had a problem with making the moves when the opportunity presents itself. If I take too long to think something over, sometimes I bail completely, and this was something that I absolutely could not allow myself to back out of. The entire day, I felt a love radiating throughout that I had never felt before (not including the two Orthodox men who showed up to use the Mikvah after us). I had been taken into this religion and community prior, but I finally felt like I was home. It has affected me in the best ways possible, and only a few not so great. I am now a part of a loving, caring, and warm community where people support each other, even the complete strangers. I am learning, and I know that I will never stop. My personal beliefs are supported, validated, and challenged in a way that causes me to grow rather than become defensive. The only part of this experience that has led me to feel something other than love and warmth is that now I am exposed to bigotry and antisemitism. I have to fight to take my holidays off from work. People think I'm dirty and money-grabbing, or that I'm a part of some elite group that controls the world, or that I deserve to die. Despite all that, I would never trade this experience for the world.

Volunteering with refugees changed my life. I gained new perspective, new friends, and a new appreciation for how fortunate I am. I recognize new privilege I never saw before, and am much more open-minded than I was before.

My oldest daughter, fell head over heels in love only to have her heart broken. It kills me to see her question her self-worth because she is so smart and kind. I'm trying to help by sending her a daily inspirational quote (some funny, some serious) to help remind her to move ahead. No one tells you before you are a parent that you will never stop worrying about your child. It doesn't matter how old they are; seeing them hurt makes you hurt, too.

Choreographing West Side Story. I had so many doubts. Could I live up to it? Could I do it justice? Could I get kids who aren't dancers to look any good at all? Could I do it in a time frame that is, blatantly, not enough? So many of my internal voices were saying: don't risk it. Don't risk your reputation. But I threw those to the wind. And I had an incredible result, not just the final project but the whole experience from top to bottom. I began to understand -- not for the first time, but in an ever more conscious and complex way -- that the pursuit of an artistic goal is about the WHO and the HOW more than the "what." On the one hand I feel I learned so much from it. I'm certainly proud of what I got them to do, and proud that everyone said the dance was the best part. On the other hand I feel as though it's a bit of a mystery, how did I do it? I'm hungry to try my hand at it again. And the doubts are there -- was it a coincidence? Can I do it again? Will I fail and suffer the humiliation of knowing my powers aren't as great as I think they are? I'm trying to learn the lesson of taking the risk despite the doubts. I need to email Kate about Mamma Mia . . . But most essentially that was an inspiring experience for me. I enjoyed working with the kids so much. They enriched me with the artistry that they gave back. They really *danced* the music, and for possibly the first time in my career as a teacher and choreographer, watching the piece was as satisfying to me as dancing it would have been. That was new, and that is a testament to them as workers, artists, and dancers. That's my new goal for all my pieces, all my classes. It's a very intoxicating goal to have. I learned that I love to inspire people, I love to make them feel stretched, challenged, and inspired. People need guidance to give themselves permission to enjoy those things, to release their self-doubts and have fun within the context of things that are hard. I love to be a part of helping people get there. The first step will always be helping myself get there, just to take on the project, put my name on it, and step in front of the room.

I changed jobs and left my Govt position, after 25 years of service to be a partner in a consulting company. I am grateful I found the courage and am inspired everyday. I see the good we do and it touches lives directly.

On an impulse I applied for a job in Oban and to my surprise I was selected for interview. To my even greater surprise I got the job. Luckily I passed my driving test, bought a car, and relocated in a couple of months. I'm living in a small cabin on a farm and am truly thankful for this opportunity. The job is working out better than I expected and I am finally working to my potential. The only drawback is that it isn't quite full time and it's a bit more expensive to live here than I thought. For the first time in years I feel settled and can catch my breath. If you had told me a year ago that I would be in this place I never would have believed it.

I was scheduled for double jaw surgery in July, then the surgery got pushed to October. I'm 30, and I have braces. After the July date came and went, I felt like the dog in the house on fire. I kept telling everyone (myself included) that this was fine, but I was starting to lose it. It's like I had a certain amount of patience and bravery squirreled away, and after those reserves ran out, I had trouble sleeping, I started engaging in obsessive-compulsive behaviors, and I felt on the verge of tears all the time, with no trigger. This taught me that some years all you accomplish is surviving, and that's ok.

I am smiling because this year was so full... so so full. Typically a year in my life is full and typically the majority of the weight of experience is on the negative side of the scale. There were negative experiences to be sure this year. But for once, there were far more positive experiences. The one or two that stand out to me most are the seemingly smallest and most private. My husband and I celebrated our ninth wedding anniversary and therefore lived most of our tenth married year. We have been together for over twelve years now and next month we will celebrate our tenth anniversary. This is not a small thing, we know this. We are grateful - so grateful - for this gift. The second thing - the experience and moment that came to mind immediately when I read this questions - is that I shared my art with him this year. I think it is extremely ridiculous that it took this long (twelve years!?) but I suppose that element is more of a statement on how bound I have been and subsequently all that I have endured. During a sleepy slow morning in our bed with our girls running to and fro, I shared two of the songs that I have written this past year. It was embarrassing. It was terrifying. It was invigorating. It was a rush! He liked them! (This is a big deal because he is a talented musician with great taste in music.) And he was proud of me. (Whew, I am tearing up just thinking about it.) I am grateful, relieved, inspired... Mad at myself for not keeping the momentum going. But grateful to savor and indulge in what was given to me in those moments: affirmation, encouragement, and my confidence was built.

Experiences abound. Most of them have been kind of life-altering. Possibly the biggest is that this is my first time being a caretaker. I couldn't have imagined the effect it has had on me. It has caused me to have difficulty with my workplace, for one major example. Taking time off to care for a sick loved one is apparently not the most ideal situation...I might be a little bitter about the way my supervisor has handled that. As for my feelings: I'm still sorting those out. I probably will be for quite some time. I am overwhelmed by the amount of energy it takes, but I'm not feeling resentment or bitterness at that. But, it is a very difficulty situation to navigate.

My wife and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. I became even more appreciative of our marriage and thankful for her love.

I moved out of my mom's house and into a house with two friends. I feel like this transition has made me take more responsibility for myself and my life. If I grocery shop and prepare healthy meals for myself, then I do. I feel good about myself. If I decide to spend money and order to go food every night, I have made that decision on my own, and usually feel bad for spending too much money and eating unhealthy food. I am responsible for my own health and my happiness. I have had the opportunity to spend more time with two friends of mine in a different capacity. I have had to navigate our relationship as housemates as well as friends, and I think it has made me more thoughtful and better at interpersonal relationships. I feel inspired by living without my parents and being able to do it without too much help. I feel like because I have been able to do this, there is so much more i can do.

my parents separated, it was hard at first but now is nice and a lot less stressful on me. they used to always fight and yell and it gave me anxiety but i’m better now.

I released my 1st Amazon Hot + Cold Pack product on 3-18-18. I'm Happy, Grateful + ready to release #2 Sinus/HA pack soon. (9-12-18).

I went to Berlin to visit my friend Susan. The trip was very spontaneous and fortuitous. The opportunity arose, it was affordable and I had the leave available. I needed to get out of the American emotional field and here was my chance. Susan and I began planning on-line. I would not have a phone once I left the homeland and so it was important to exchange details ahead of time to be sure we were on the same time frame. The flights went off without a hitch, although I was detained at customs in Iceland for extra scrutiny. I was worried about missing my flight, as it was a very quick turnaround, but they assured me I would not miss it. I found it hard to sleep and did not get a single good nights sleep while visiting the 9 days, until the very last night. I did not know then, that this insomnia would become a major health issue in the coming months and I still wonder if the time change of 12 hours had something to do with that. Susan and I had a wonderful time. We walked miles through the city, shared life stories and compared notes on growing up, falling in love, navigating betrayal and rising from the ashes. We visited museums, ate good German food, drank good German beer along with meals from Iraq, Vietnam and Italy. We drank good coffee with thick cream. We ate the best butter on whole grain breads and succumbed to cream filled pastries and fresh squeezed orange juice. It was such a relief to be in the European Union, in Berlin made whole again. Visiting the Holocaust Museum affected me acutely! Reading how the Nazis ever so slowly and methodically took over the people's minds and hearts using fear and nationalism, was a lock-step for what was happening in America. It weighed ever more on us, as we wound our way through to the brutal outcome of millions murdered, whole families and generations imprisoned, tortured and exterminated. All while the majority of the German population looked the other way. The day was blazing azure and filled with scintillating light when we came up from underground. The grief and heaviness we experienced lifted some and we walked to the Brandenburg Gate. Tired from the emotion laced with the keen recognition of what was happening back home, we hired a bicycle cart to ferry us to an old, traditional German restaraunt, where we tried old world food including apple strudel with homemade custard and whipped cream. In Berlin I cut my hair and made the decision to grow it long again. Susan and I explored the mysteries of ancient pyramids and new research giving credence to ancient civilizations that eclipse the rise of homo-sapiens on the planet. We remembered one another after a long hiatus--we recovered ourselves from our marriages and our divorces. In the end it was hard coming back into America and it has not been easy since. I am so grateful for this journey away and for the Vibali Spa that washed our grief away.

One week ago, on the 4th of September, I came home to a disoriented husband. Thinking is was a stroke (when he could not tell me what year it was or the name of the current POTUS), I took him to the nearest ER. Tests upturned nothing and the diagnosis was Transient Global Amnesia, better than a stroke. But still, +/-6 hours of being with him in his lack of memory that was reminiscent of being with my father who has Alzheimer's. It was one of the two scariest days of my life and it left me exhausted and feeling shell shocked. Even today, a week later, I am prone to tears and to sitting and staring out the window, unable to be functional.

This was the year I converted! I'm officially a member of the Tribe, and I feel like I'm home. I feel like I've found a spiritual home I truly relate to, and a community that finally makes sense to me. There are obviously plenty of things I still don't know, but I look forward to the learning. ❤️❤️

My daughter decided to live with me full-time. I’m so grateful that she was able to come to this decision on her own, be honest with yourself, be honest with her dad, and be honest with her grandparents. Of course I have less time to myself now. So I need to figure out how to find more me time. But it’s worth it For her mental health and well-being.

About this time last year I was crazy stressed and seriously quitting changing my job. At the beginning of November I did! By December I was working in my current gig where the work is still challenging but life is so much easier. So much so that I'm sitting in a hotel room in Rome, four nights into a two week vacation. I'm incredibly grateful for my current opportunity but I'd be lying if I wasn't a little resentful that the people at my last job made it needlessly more difficult leading me to stop doing something I actually quite loved. Maybe some day the experience will lead me to become involved in government from the other side - the elected one.

I think that one of my most significant experiences this year has been becoming a runner. I started a C25K training program last year and was able to successfully complete a 5K after the High Holidays. After the race ended though, I stopped running, but was inspired to begin again in the spring, successfully completing a 5K in June. I've been on again / off again with the running, but do feel like it has become a real part of my life. I feel powerful when I run (most of the time) and the incorporation of this activity into my definition of myself is life-changing.

I think the most significant experience I've had this year was facing the bad things in my past and going to therapy to help process the things that have happened to me. It was driven by the #metoo movement and my inability to join in when I had stuff to share too. I think I'm resentful, relieved and inspired, haha! I was resentful that I have stuff that I didn't want to face and still don't. I'm resentful of the men that have felt free to target children and women in the way they do. I'm relieved that I started facing them. I'm inspired by my resiliency and know that this was something that needed to be done for my own mental health. I'm inspired by the bravery of those who have come forward with their stories in the past year and hopeful that at some point I will feel strong enough to do that, too.

this past year has been all about emotions and feelings and trying to understand them, actually it has been like a roller coster of emotions. A significant experience has been my boyfriend's marriage proposal that happened the 8th of august, I've never experience this kind of emotions, it felt like butterflies in my stomach all over again after five 5 years of dating. I felt really happy and excited, I couldn't work or think normally for a whole week! Sometimes I felt overwhelmed, it was just to much. But it was a really beautiful experience and a great surprise. Then you start thinking about life and what comes next, priorities change even tough we've already live together. Am I grateful? I am. I'm totally grateful to have found the love of my life, and the man who I want to spend my life with. I know it sounds cheesy, but it isn't that we are a great couple, we are a great team and than makes me feel like putting pieces of a puzzle that perfectly match. Does that make sense? This experience inspires me every day, not so much for the wedding, I mean yes, but for what comes next in life and how we are going to spend our lives together being a great support for each other while we each full-fill our dreams, as I said, priorities have change.

I started a new job last December, after being unemployed for months. I'm still not financially stable, but I'm very happy with this new job. The people I work with are kind and friendly, the job itself is flexible, and focused on productive work rather than the appearance of being busy. I really feel comfortable here, and it's been a boon to my life. It's not perfect, I don't like the service we sell and our business model, but right now I'm happy to be working somewhere comfortable.

This year I told someone that loved them. I’ve never felt so connected to another person before. I feel so comfortable with her.

David started making plans with his family independent of me I was welcome to join him but he wasn't upset if I didn't. It was the only thing we disagrred about and it makes me feel much closer to him and more willing to jin him sometimes

Promotion to supervisor, with a catch. I'm grateful, pissed, pleased, confused. Ready for a leap.

I ceased to work at a job I had been for 3 years and was extremely unhappy the whole time. It still felt bad to not to have something lined up that was better. I am so relieved to not be on the corporate path any longer. I am resentful on how little I learned there and long I stayed. I am inspired to do more with my life but am not sure exactly where to put my energy because I am now scared to waste time in a meaningless direction. I can hear the resistance in this last sentence. I know I need to just get started and the path will reveal itself.

We decided to start our own business, buy a small farm and live on it! We haven't actually bought anything yet or moved yet. But we've been telling friends and family about this decision and I even told work that I want to be remote. We have a plan put in place to move and we are slowly executing towards it. It's a lot of scary and exciting rolled into one. Sometimes I wish it was moving a little faster, but that's the way it goes sometimes.

Having the opportunity/responsibility to impact worship planning decisions. It has been a daunting, difficult yet hopeful process. But it feels like it could go away with the slightest lag in perseverance. It has required greater dependence on God’s leading and providence.

Our daughter was born in January. Being a mother is the most wonderful, terrifying, exhilarating experience. It is more difficult and more intense than anyone can explain but I feel more complete than I have in a long time.

All the words that spring to mind reference my endurance: I endured, I survived, I weathered... I got through moves by all of my people, welcomed them in and out of my house, held my marriage together, filled in all the unemployment forms, saved and adjusted. I tried to form more friendships, more writing community, but I'm still trying and not sure yet if I've succeeded...

We moved back to the area where we met. It's so great to be surrounded by friends who are less than an hour away!

I have completed 25 poems and 12 canvases and begun work on a memoir - all through a writing group that I joined.

I got this new incredible job that I love and I feel respected and influential (if that even makes sense) and I’m finally feel like I’ve found something I’m really good at, and now I’m doing it!

I began my Multiple Subject Teaching Credential Program. It has been really challenging and really rewarding. I still don't feel confident that I can be a teacher, but I know that doing the credential program is setting me on the path I want to be on and it will help my career crystallize into something wonderful. And I know that I'm good at it and I like being part of people's lives and my community. I also know that it stresses me out immensely. Mainly due to my own self-doubt. If there was a self-doubt dial in my brain, it's probably at a 9 and I wish I could scale it down to a 3. Because that stress and self-doubt does serve the purpose of motivating me to be better, but it cripples my spirit when it's up too high.

My daughter got so angry at me. It hurt me deeply and also opened my eyes to real reasons why she felt so angry

So we just completed a trip of a lifetime (hope that is not literal just yet) on the Orient Express with time before in England and after in France. It was more trouble than we have had in years as we had a British travel agent and had to do a lot of recon work on our own. I hope the results of the trip are we never go coach again, and never go on unstructured tours again. Experiences were great but we worked too hard for people of 73 and 74. Loved Istanbul, and surprised to love and want to return to Budapest.

I was about 9 months into my position as an Event Coordinator for Workday. I loved the company and what it stood for. The culture was incredible, and there were so many good perks. My boss did not micro manage, and I could work remote whenever I wanted. I got lots of swag, got to travel a bit, and got to host events within Recruiting. At my last event at SPIN, I got way too drunk, blacked out, tried to drive home, and told a Manager to fuck off. They were trying to contain me and they did not want me to drive and I was not letting that happen. They officially saw the dark side is what happened. I was mortified, and my phone died for good so I could never text or call them regarding what happened. All seems like a fluke, meant to be, or something. In a way it was. I got back from the Grand Canyon to an email firing me from Workday. I felt defeated, even though I had conquered 35 miles down and up the Grand Canyon. Thank god for my bf, because he supported me so nicely through that hiccup. I was so relieved that he didn't judge me for what I had done. He puts up with a lot of my bs. The beauty that came out of this was the fact that I quit drinking for 3 weeks and screwed my head back on right. I wound up being able to have an enjoyable break from the working world, I collected unemployment, and I got hired on at Lime making $8 more an hour ($33). I would say it wasn't a total loss, but a lesson learned. I struggle with alcohol, it doesn't fit into my life very well.

I recently was offered a role in the health and fitness industry, which will in turn bring the end to working in hospitality. I am excited and relived that it has finally happened. I am a step closer to coaching full time. I also have a few interviews lined up, as well as having a successful business meeting for a potential gym/cafe idea.

I went back to university this year. It has certainly shaken things up, spending less time at work and feeling less in control of my day-to-day life. I'm happy I made this step for myself but it's very hard to adjust. It's hard to work on projects I don't feel passionate about.

I have a friend who is dying of cancer. Though nobody is saying that it's a certainty, it feels like a foregone conclusion. The measures they are taking for him are designed to postpone the inevitable at this point, not to treat the disease. When I first went to bring him food on the meal train, when there was hope I suppose, he was noble, the paragon of courage, and I felt inspired by his journey. Subsequently when I've seen him, he's been embittered, depressed, disheartened. I try to remember the lessons of his life, the cautionary tale that one should cherish every day and be present for our loved ones and not sweat the small stuff, but it's difficult to remember that when the daily grind settles in. Still, in his honor, whenever I do become obsessed with minutia, I think of him and wrap up what I'm doing in order to go see my kids and wife.

I quit my job. I’m relieved and terrified, to quote the kids. Hope inspiration comes next...

I got engaged to a wonderful and kind man. I was so happy. But I am more and more certain that I want the freedom of an open relationship. I want to explore the possibilities with other partners. I want to feel that fizzing spark with someone when you meet and find all the ways in which you connect. I want to be able to explore that rather than feel like I have to deny it. I also started taking my creative writing career seriously. That’s been a big shift balancing feelings of failure and determination and self belief.

I had a painful parting of the ways with a group of long term friends that I had physically moved away from several years ago. The circumstances of our falling out caused a lot of hurt and anger that I have had a hard time letting go of, even now, nine months later. At the same time, it helped me to recognize that these relationships were no longer relevant to my current life and were not worth the effort to maintain across distance. It was time to move on.

Working days changed my sleep schedule and prompted my extrovert self to emerge. I am never going back despite the stress or increase of work.

I have gotten to be more responsible with school and from that I got to hang out with friends. I’m very happy that this happend to me and that I get to experience what it’s like to have more control of what I do.

We got married. And engaged. In the opposite order. What a year of wonder and love. I am incredibly grateful for my community and Seth, and how they have embraced each other. I'm excited and eager for the next phase.

Geopolitically it seems that we are just in a long line of terrible things happening this year.

I turned 40. Honestly, I was dreading it. But then I read something that said a lot of people don't get the privilege of turning 40 or growing old, so I made the choice to embrace it. And it has been wonderful.

In the past year, I got accepted into graduate school. I was relieved, excited, and most of all ready. I feel like for the past few years, I have been making plans for this moment. I made so many versions of the same plan. It all ultimately led to me being in graduate school. It took a lot for me to actually apply because I was so scared. I knew it was something I wanted to do. I knew it was the right program. I knew I was qualified. But I was still so scared. I don't know why. I kept finding reasons to put it off. Then I realized that I just have to do it. I have to go for it because I won't know until I put myself out there. Going through this process, I realized how lucky I was to have my boyfriend. My boyfriend has helped me gain the confidence to actually apply. I think we're all super harsh on ourselves. We never think that we're good enough. My boyfriend kept telling me that I was better than "just good enough". He kept reminding me of my qualifications and all of my hard work. I remember when I told him that I got accepted, he told me that he wasn't surprised. He already knew it was going to happen. From that moment on, I was finally at a point in my life where all the plans I was making were actually happening and I didn't have to plan. I just had to keep going. This was all in February. Now, it's September and I am in the program. I am so happy. I am so motivated. I am so determined to get through this chapter of my life.

Hmm... no new grandchildren this past year. Significant experience I guess was visiting one grandson in his group home where he was locked up for a year, and seeing him finish his program, learn new ways of thinking, get off probation, start a job at Pizza Hut and so far, stay out of trouble. The LOVE in our family is huge and keeps us going, through very difficult times.

I made the very difficult decison to leave a school-based position (where I have been for 19 years) and accept a position where I affect more change on the system, thereby helping more kids. I miss my kids so, so much but I know that I made the right decision for my mental and physical health, as well as for the educational system in which I work. I am in awe that all of my hard work and my deep passion for equity has put me in the position I am in and I am scared I will fail.

Abrie was born. It changed the shape of my world. I’m still discovering the ways it’s affected me and getting used to this little person being a part of me. I feel so fortunate to have the family I wanted - even as I learn who he is and reshape my life around him, since day one I’ve felt a hole in my life being filled by his presence in our family.

going to France because of a crazy non-sober decision was one of the best bad decisions I ever made. In hindsight we probably could have done the trip for cheaper but we had such a good time and probably never would have ended up somewhere like the south of France had I not made the initial bad decision (bid in an auction). It definitely taught me to take risks particularly with travel and made me thirsty for so much more diverse travel.

My son's Bar Mitzvah, which just happened a few weeks ago, was a very significant experience. I am relieved it's over and my parents and extended family were here to participate. I am proud of my son as he got really nervous right before. I am grateful our Rabbi was so supportive and wise in helping my son prepare and made such a meaningful experience for my son, our family and all of our guests.

I lost a group of friends in the past year that I never thought I would lose. I guess they weren’t really my friends after all. But I went through a super rough time with it. Still, I’ve grown from walking through some really desolate places. I hope I’m growing. I am feeling somewhat stronger now. But the loss has been great. My heart feels cracked. Hopefully I can mend it with gold. Hopefully I’m learning and leaning in healthy directions. Hopefully I’ll be a bit more wabi-sabi as a result.

There is much more to being alive than I previously understood. The depth and expanse of who I contain is often more than I have words for. To be alive in this moment, still on a journey of energy made manifest is a blessing.

I graduated magna cum laude with a B.A. in Psychology. I don't regret dropping out of college a few years ago, but I am proud of myself for returning to school and finishing my degree. I pushed myself intellectually and renewed my interest in academic learning. Pursuing psychology also opened the door to my current career in ABA therapy. Ive enjoyed working in ABA so much that I am considering studying ABA at the graduate level. I feel like the future holds much more opportunity for me than it did prior to achieving my degree.

I've got a cat and a dog fulfiled my family made a lot of laughter and fun

Uhm, well, I selected subjects for preliminaries. It has made me somewhat scared for the future

This past year has brought about some awareness to my thought processes. I am learning acceptance more, learning how to forgive better and learning how to stay in the present. This is all very difficult considering that I feel the odds are against me. My personal relationships all have problems: unmet needs, dishonesty, lack of support and how I constantly struggle with feeling that I am being rejected. All this came to a crashing halt on Saturday night when one of my closest friends, Alison, died. I spent 5 of her final hours at her bedside along with her boyfriend, a caregiver and a patient advocate who I deeply resent. I had to overcome all my feelings and be there for this precious individual who was dying in front of us. She suffered a post-surgery brain injury in December 2015 and had a stroke 3 weeks ago from which she never awoke.I will not eulogize her here, rather just say that I am grateful for my presence in her life and hers in mine. I am relieved that she is no longer suffering. I want there to be some takeaway from her wretched experiences these past years but I cannot imagine what that would be to the moment. In the end, all we really have is the veil of love that we cling to. The one thing that feeds our soul. And maybe that is all I can ask for.

Moving to a new place. It was a mistake. I'm depressed and feel like I'm in a downward spiral. Things are just going from bad to worse.

A significant experience that has happened within the past year, is working for NSLC at Yale. I’ve always said that SSTI is the most incredible experience of my life thus far, but this may top it. I don’t want to make my experiences compete though, because this program is totally different. I got to be on staff, have authority, have 12 students look up to me, teach a playwriting masterclass, see 2 broadway shows, and really have the most incredible job. It was fucking hard most days, but the insight I gained, the friends I made with my staff, and ultimately seeing the students explore and discover new things, made it all worth it, every moment. I am exceedingly grateful. I saw the best version of myself I may have ever seen. I was working, doing something I loved, in a beautiful place, with incredible people who I am sure were meant to be in my life. I was so happy. And when I wasn’t, I had the right people by my side. It came to a point where I knew I was my best self because I was so much more aware of the moments when I’d slip into self doubt and self deprecation. What sucked about this experience though, was the transition away from it because I really had found a version of myself that I liked the most and it had a lot to do with my staff and my environment, and once that changed, it easy very difficult. But I’m trying to find it again here. We will see.

I got reactive arthritis after a work trip to India. That all sounds very straightforward now, but in reality it was days, weeks and months of not knowing. Of thinking that it was a stress fracture, sesamoiditis, osteoarthritis, fibromyalgia and a thousand other unknowns. In that time I couldn't walk without pain, or sit, or sleep. I slept wedged between pillow so I wouldn't move in the night and cause pain to my big toe joint, my knees or my hips. My husband was supportive and in a funny way, it was good for us because I was at home for the longest period I've been in about 2.5 years. It was a shame that it was at a time where I couldn't actually do anything, but we got a lot of TV watched. I am so bitter about it and not because of what happened, but because no one seems to really give a shit. My so called friends are so wrapped up in their own lives that they didn't bother to visit, or message, or call. In three months, two people visited me. Two. They also can't remember what it is that's wrong. 'How's your back?' 'your leg?? (!)' *shrugs*. It's taught me that I can rely on no-one but myself. Thanks, world.

I wonder how I’ll feel about this next time I read this, but it feels obvious right now that the most significant experience that has happened this year has been my disc herniation/ back problems that have kept me incapacitated most of the summer not to mention 2 trips to the hospital and multiple doctors visits. For all of August and now a big chunk of September, I have been unable to walk or exercise and had to give up a trip to Israe and attending my friend Carrie’s wedding. I watched lots of tv and ate lots of unhealthy food resulting in a weight gain of at least 20 pounds (i assume). It’s hard to say I don’t feel at least a little bit resentful/guilty about letting myself go and not using my mandatory “down-time” to challenge myself cerebrally or express myself creatively. I can only focus on tomorrow... But on the other hand I do feel immensely grateful to all my family and friends who have supported me, visited me, and checked up on me while I have been down for the count. My sister visited me twice without hesitation, and took extremely good care of me, down to bringing me toothpaste and a cup when walking to the bathroom was too hard. My friends like Tali, Tania, Steff, Emily, Michelle, Rachel, Karen, Vicky, Val, Clara, Zack, Dahna, Jessi and Alison, who all visited me during different stages of my hospitalization or home recovery, and cooked for me, cleaned for me, and entertained me. And of course the emotional, mental, and financial support I received from my aunt and uncle Asher and Aunt Becky, as well as my parents who on very short notice bought flights from Israel to LA and stayed with me for 10 days so they could be with me on Rosh Hashanah and take really good care of me and just make me feel extremely loved in the greatest way possible. It makes me feel inspired and grateful and humble and lucky and all kinds of things. I want to know that when I get fully better I can be that same support system for those people who are there for me. I also feel inspired to help those that don’t have a structured support system like I do, people who are lonely and deserve love and compassion because life can be tough and sometimes the biggest comfort can be the smallest gesture, just having someone else acknowledge you with a smile and do something nice and thoughtful for you. The volunteers at the Cedar Sinai emergency room especially inspired me and I hope by the time I read this, I will be well enough to get back into volunteering full time.

both my parents let me down in a big way. Independently of each other. Life-and-death or lifeline kinda stuff. It has helped me let go of any expectations of them, which is good, but it has also eroded my regard for and trust in them, which is bad ...for our relationship.

this past year i fell in love. it was wonderful until it ended , until the loss was a strong as the gain. i am at peace with it, now, and the memories that come shock me with happiness until they can conform back into quiet melancholy, the kind tinged with sweet bliss. i am not resentful, if only because i have expunged my capacity for caring that way. i still miss him sometimes. i realize i can handle commitment and that love is real. i am not cynical : i hope it will happen again. to know the world of, through love... what a knowledge!

This past year I’ve been asked to take on significant additional responsibilities at work , specifically product management duties for Collaboration and Eikon Messenger. Although this additional responsibility has come with no raise or official promotion, I’m grateful for this opportunity given that it offers me a significant new challenge , a great opportunity to learn and a fortuitous way to expand my career and breadth of skills and experience.

I can’t really think of a significant experience but when I reflect upon this past year - specifically this summer and working with a coach - the realization of how I allow myself to get caught up with other peoples needs of me and how it derails me. It’s my pattern. And now that I’m aware of it and what I can do to keep it in check, it’s been very helpful. Also, it became very apparent to me how much family time I got this summer - and get throughout the year - especially with Mike’s side. I want to create more with my immediate family and my side. I feel empowered knowing this info - and inspires me to schedule more time making things happen.

הנסיעה לווייטנאם עם אמא ומור. היה חופשה מדהימה ומאוד כיפית. גם היה כיף עם אמא ומור וגם וייטנאם הקסימה אותי. החזיר לי את האהבה והרצון לטייל במזרח

Found God. Reading Torah ands struggling with the stories of our patriarchs and matriarchs. They were deeply flawed--who is willing to kill their child, who orders a mother and child out into the desert to die, who cheats his brother? And God? Deeply flawed as well--what do I want with a God that orders a man to kill his son? And then it came to me: I am deeply flawed as well. And what would I do with a perfect God? How could I pray to a perfect God? If Abraham and Sarah, Jacob and the rest get to have a god, why not me?

I persuaded two sets of friends to go on cycling holidays and completed an olympic distance triathlon. This put my body and mind to the test, and I felt such a sense of achievement I almost cried when I got to the peak of the hill on the second day of the cycling trip in France! I feel so lucky to have people to train with, and people who supported me:)

Being kicked out of my mom's home for a few weeks. Obviously I wish it had never happened. But I actually got a lot of good out of it. 1. I realized that even though I might not have had friends to hang out with or talk to all the time, in a time of need, people were there and they cared. Tirtza and Hila letting me live with them. Rosie offering shabbat meals and a place to stay later on even though it never actually happened. Jamie just being there for me to talk to all the time about it. Zack for cheering me up and saying he was there for me even though I didn't actually explain to him what happened (he said he doesn't know what happened and doesn't need to know but if I need anything just ask). Also teachers. I learned how to advocate for myself, and all my teachers were so supportive. Reusch, Crincoli, Lisa, Sharfman, Schwarzberg...etc Crincoli even offered to bring me clothes and Lisa said she'd give me rides. Not that I needed that stuff, but I needed the supportive ears and to realize that I wasn't as alone as I thought I was. 2. Made me think about the way I treat my mom. It actually has an impact. Yeah, I'm angry. Yeah, she's said worse things. But it comes back to bite you, and neither of us actually want these fights. She shouldn't have kicked me out, but I also shouldn't have said certain things to her.

Taking care of my grandfather and watching him die. I am so grateful for the time I had with him. I am relieved that he is no longer suffering. I miss him so much and think about him often.

I had a horrible experience with a woman of authority in my office. She treated me terribly and in front of all the leaders in our region. She was angry because as the Employee representative in our office people had let me know how unhappy they were but didn’t want their names used. This made her very angry and she screamed and belittled me and made me feel awful. I was ready to quit my job right then and there! But I am really proud of how I handled myself. I did not cry! I did not tell her the names. I did not yell or raise my voice. I did say that I was sorry she was upset but that I felt that I had to respect the people and not name names. I offered a few solutions. I was quaking the entire time. My direct supervisor was only there by phone and he is deaf with hearing aids do coukdnt really hear what was happening. However when I finally left and got about 10 steps towards my office and was thinking about just leaving for good, my phone buzzed and Bobby my supervisor was asking if I am ok and can he call me as soon as the meeting was over for him. I later found out the woman he was on conference call with let him know what had happened. He was mortified and angry for me. He and all my co- workers and friends rallied around me and I realized I was not alone. Unfortunately the incident caused a MAJOR flare up of my colitis and I have been pretty sick fir over 2 months now. I did realize how strong I can be. I realized that the faith and feelings I had in the people I have picked to be significant in my life were reciprocal and I was really making significant and positive changes in my life

Adam's mother died two days before Rosh Hashanah, and was buried the morning before the holiday started. I don't totally know how it will affect me or us. Up until now - the day after Rosh Hashanah, when I am writing - it's been about details and trying to figure out how to support Adam. She had been in hospice, and we had navigated a space where our family was stronger than ever - but so far this new space is harder to figure out and I've been unable to avoid conflict with Adam. So, instead, I am focussing entirely on making sure the kids are stable and taken care of. I'm grateful to her for Adam and therefore for our family.

I accepted the invitation of a poet to talk poetry and share some of my work while she served as the visiting writer at the local university. Graciously, she gave me time and feedback, suggesting ways I might share my work outside publishing. She went the extra mile in offering to read my first chapbook and make suggestions before I submitted it and shared some of her upcoming chapbook with me. I didn’t make the finalists’ list in the chapbook competition, but I regained confidence in my writing, clarified my goals and, hopefully, made a friend for life. I am so grateful and re-inspired to continue with my work, growing, learning and taking pleasure in exploring through writing. Sapiens: A Brief History of Mankind by Yuval Noah Harari gave me a perspective on our times that eased my anxieties about the current state of civilization. He approached the history of mankind in five broad themes that made where we are seem almost inevitable. For all our progress in some areas, we Sapiens haven’t changed much in our basic nature, as if we are still operating largely on our reptilian brains. This notion abated some of the despair in which I was drowning, relieved me of my notion that I must somehow right the world. That doesn’t mean I should stand by in the face of our times, but I am more realistic—and at peace—about what I can do. So I am grateful for Harari’s thoughts, relieved and freer to use my energies for making a difference where I can.

Roi: 1. I got married. It made me feel that I found my place in the world. It gave me inspiration - that I’m responsible to create my own future. 2. My band broke up. At first it made me feel resentful. But after I processed all the feelings I had, I felt lighter. Dani: 1. The Festival. Being with a difficult co-director. And I got fired. It was such a learning experience, to stand up for myself and fight it and not believe that their criticism is true. Speaking to all students and others that supported me made me believe that I’m OK. 2. Being married - making it public - made me feel more secure and confident to think about my professional life and life in general. Even if the job doesn’t work out, I will be fine and find something better.

My only child started college. I miss him, and I worry, but there is a lot of positive change in the air. I can pick up and move. I can end my toxic relationship. I can sleep in his room! My work life has no constraints. I can cook and eat exactly what I want. I am so excited about moving, I have already started planning for my new apartment. It's nice to daydream while I put the puzzle pieces in place. North Carolina? I hope I did enough to prepare him for college and beyond. Did I show enough love? I miss him and I worry...

Our son's bar mitzvah! After struggling with anxiety he rose to the occassion and did an amazing job! We felt relieved for sure - proud and so grateful!!

I started dating Craig at around this time last year. Now, we're getting serious and talking about moving in together and eventually getting married and starting a family. It's definitely a milestone for me, especially considering the fact that I was miserable without a relationship and felt like I was the only poor, unfortunate soul, who will never get married. I'm extremely grateful, but of course somewhat apprehensive as well. It's a huge step forward and I've never lived with a guy before (Dad and Grandpa don't count, obviously), but hopefully next year at this time, we will have been living together for over six months and will continue being happy.

My son started to take anti depressants. This has had a huge effect on us as a family as he has 'woken up'. He has got motivation for the first time in 4 years. I have mixed feelings as he is young to be taking them (18) but I have a history of depression and think I probably needed them when I was his age but I didn't start taking them until I was 40.

Discovering that I am 2 class away from graduation. two. wow. in October I will meet with my counselor to fill out forms for it and determine my final class. Also, I will sign up for CSUN. what a nice bost in the path to my goal for my retirement. I'm on my way.

By playing rugby for the Boca travel team I have learned to become a better team player and become a better leader. I am grateful for that.

An 85' piece of redwood tree fell off when a trunk split in my back yard and crushed the fence. It woke me up to the forces of nature. Grateful that no one was hurt. Relieved that the school provided access through their gates. Resentful ?somewhat,that the school threatened me and that I paid for clean up on their property when it wasn't my responsibility.Inspired to put some energy into my backyard, create a taller more beautiful fence, etc.

I got an unexpected divorce after 22 years of marriage. Just dumped. But, six months later, I am actually glad it is over with and I no longer live every day in fear of disapproval and the silent treatment.

My best friends mother passed away in a tragic event. It made me question how to be a good friend and what people who've lost loved ones really need in these situations. I think it's a combination of just being there - just show up for the funeral. You don't have to say the perfect thing - they won't hear it. Don't tell them you know what they're experiencing. Just tell them you're sorry and be there. Then continue to be there - make excuses to get together (want to watch the game?) I think sometimes they'll want to talk about it, and sometimes they want to talk about anything but that. Offering to "help" is useless, they won't take it. Pick something specific (like food, or help with the kids) and just do it. It made me question the way I've reacted to previous situations (other, less close friends having family pass away, or going through medical issues). I realize that because it's uncomfortable, because I don't know what to say, I avoid it. But not doing anything is not the right thing to do. Even if you aren't close to them, just reach out and let them know you're thinking of them. Just show up at the funeral. It made me think about my parents mortality. It also made me appreciate that I still have them. Made me think I should spend more quality time with them. It also made me realize the importance of having your shit in order. If something were to happen - your loved ones would have to make arrangements and figure everything out (will, finances, bills, etc). They're going through enough, they shouldn't be burdened with extra work. Make it crystal clear what you want so they don't have the guilt of making difficult decisions. If I read this next year and I still have my arrangements in order, I should be ashamed because I'm letting my family down.

For the first time, I resigned from a work position. Leading up to the decision, I was feeling anxious. But giving my notice was like breathing fresh air. I could officially start looking towards something new.

I started a new business, and became CEO of a turn around opportunity. I am feeling creative, grateful, supported, and in the moment very patient -- in that it will take months and years for these opportunities to mature, grow into fully realized businesses. I am inspired, and a moments, very fearful and out of control. Yet, it is what I signed up for !

Losing my father has been a tough road. He was ill for a long time, and in some ways we lost him years ago, but that doesn't matter. We didn't always talk, but his presence in my life was huge. I am all that you asked. Grateful he died peacefully; his last words, "Thank you." Relieved he, and my mother as caregiver, isn't suffering. Resentful that physical disability and disease took him from us slowly, and my kids, who knew his love, didn't also know his grace. Inspired to live will. All this and more.

In the past year I walked a pilgrimage of over 1000 km to find peace with my late husband's death. I walked as an atonement so that he might find peace, if he has not. I walked to find forgiveness for my past-self who had a significant part to play in the events leading to his death. As I walked I found not only these things, but also a renewed life purpose. A possible future path to continue walking along the rest of my days.

I lost my uterus. That makes it sound like I misplaced it somewhere, but either way it is gone. I'd always kinda held out hope that I could carry my own child some day, or maybe even use a surrogate with my own eggs. But that is gone now. I don't even know how to formulate and verbalize the hurt. A part of me is relieved, because there is no longer the question of whether we find the right doctor...could we make it happen? However, there was that spark of hope that I have to kill, and killing hope is brutal, no matter how irrational that hope is.

Working hard towards my Master's degree. Completing two semesters and finding an internship in South America - my original goal. Moving from Tel Aviv to Colombia. Grateful, and like I worked really hard to accomplish this. Feels good that a lot is behind me. Still a lot to come.

I finally graduated from a grad program and got what I think is as close to my dream job as I could imagine. I am so relieved and grateful to be done with a program that I think was a large part of creating a stressful, anxiety ridden, unhappy part of my life. Starting my new job has been amazing but I can see how the experiences of that program have impacted me in various negative ways. I feel inspired to be better every day

My sister getting married was really beautiful. It was an incredible experience and brought me closer to my family. Tzedek Lab was such an inspiration and opened some big questions for me about my work and my future.

I was promoted at work! I am grateful and inspired. After a major career change 2 years ago, I feel more confident on the path I am on and I feel like I am making an impact.

My husband lost his job. I was happy he did, because he suffered there for the past few years. But now he is stressed and worried.

I broke up with my girlfriend of two years. I was struggling with actually doing it for a long time because of the attachments I had made to her family. I still thought of her as a friend more than a partner that I would want to marry and have a family with. After hearing her reaction and receiving messages from her after the breakup, my decision was cemented or validated. The problem-solving methods we used and the difference in our maturity levels/life experience were too different. The weekend of the breakup I went on a date with Ali and my world was rocked. I knew deep down before the date that there had to be someone that I would be captivated by and share the same values and share support with and there she was. I couldn't believe how much we clicked and how instantaneously my feelings developed for her after just one date. I am inspired to pursue a relationship with her and I know I love her. Reflecting on the fast-paced nature of my now relationship with Ali, I realize that I was comfortable and complacent with my ex because it was safe, I knew that no matter what I did, she would still be there and that SHE was lucky to have me, not mutually lucky to be with each other.

In April, my 74 year old mom and her boyfriend came to visit us in CO from MN. The 2nd night of their stay she went into cardiac arrest. What followed was a long road to recovery, a 2nd heart attack, and her funeral on July 19, 2018. I have been through SO MANY EMOTIONS. I am left affected through sadness, anger, wonder, oddly a little relief, and, so much more. I miss her terribly.

We had Amalia! Crazy, since last year I was really wondering what the path forward was. Dan so desperately wanted a baby, and I was kind of obsessed about body issues/size/pregnancy. And now she's here, and I'm very much in love with her, and trying very hard to let the body issues go, since a new life is clearly more important that my weight:)

I restarted school. It has forced me to prioritize my time differently, and I'm not yet sure if the results of the work will bear out. I feel like I am being proactive about my future, but I'm not necessarily sure if I'm choosing the right future.

My brother committed suicide. It was devastating. It has made me evaluate my own life and question what’s important to me.

The thing that comes to mind is ongoing issues at work. They have shaped my views of who I want to be in the workplace and what kind of folks I'd like to be surrounded by. I am grateful conversations have been started about how difficult it is for people of color on staff at work, yet resentful that our management does not seem to take that and other things seriously. I'm inspired to be better every day whenever possible and also nervous that a system that wants to promote and reward me also engages in regular systemic racism. I have a lot of thinking to do about this in the upcoming year.

the loss of one of my closest friends to suicide. immediately it was a traumatic shock and over time it still haunts me, unlike any other loss I've experienced. it was intentional and I had no idea he was even considering this. i am angry at myself for not sensing it, i am angry at him for not reaching out for help, i am heartbroken that my friend was feeling such despair that he made this choice, i'm grateful that the last thing i said to him was, "i love you".

My job is being eliminated by my employer, where I have worked for 34 years. At age 61 I am looking for a job.

A significant experience from the past year that I believed shaped my life was becoming a teacher. Becoming a teacher completely changed the way I see the world. The children I taught brought so much passion, light, and new perspectives to my life. I'm so grateful for the opportunity I had to become an educator.

Dad had another surgery this past year. It swiss-cheesed his brain and I have put a stop to his driving because he is no longer safe behind the wheel. This makes a big impact on me because I relied on him a lot for food shopping when I am in a bad pain mode. I also worry about how bad this is going to get and I am afraid I might not be able to manage him. I am so afraid I won't be up for the task. There was a real reason I never wanted to have kids, and now I have an 87 year-old man child who is addicted to wine and won't do a damned thing to help himself.

I got to go to Africa and experience an animal safari. I feel grateful for the privilege and full of joy to see these magnificent animals surviving on our troubled earth.

I was laid off from my last full time contract. I fought the end of the job, even though it was at best a mediocre fit. I fought for it because it seemed like a safe way to keep the lights on while I did the stuff that was actually important to me. Now I'm diving into combining the 'keep the lights on' work with work that's important to me and I'm nervous but excited.

My transgender granddaughter's girlfriend, Laura, also transgender and age 20, was about to be homeless. Her family absolutely refused to let her live at home. She had exhausted all possibilities. My granddaughter, Jaz was frantic with worry. I had met Laura a few times and found her to be gentle and sweet. Her childhood and life had not been easy. She suffers from some short term memory loss and occasional PTSD and hand tremors because of a severe beating she received in high school. The gang of boys beat her with a baseball bat putting her in intensive care with traumatic brain injury. She remained in a coma for more than two weeks, not expected to live. My family, still trying to adjust to my granddaughter's gender change refused to get to know Laura and warned me not to take her in. They didn't trust her. As the days passed and I heard how desperate Jaz was, and I wrestled with what to do, I finally remembered what to do. I went into the garden to my meditation spot and simply asked. I asked the Father, "What am I to do? What do You want me to do? And Lord, please, no metaphors, no symbols,. Please remember I'm blond, and aging. Also, I need an answer within 2 days. Thank you." And then I relaxed. I felt a little bad about the 2 day deadline, but that's all Laura had. On the second day I awoke with a calm and certain knowing. Laura AND Jaz were to live with me. I knew it was the right thing and that it would work. I called Jaz to come to my house. When I gave her the news she broke down and sobbed. When she called Laura, her last night on a friend's sofa, she had to be revived from the faint. I drew up a contract for all three of us to sign. I knew it would never stand up in court, but it was a guideline. They must find jobs. (neither one was employed) They had the whole basement and must respect my privacy and solitude. They had to commit to household chores. No drugs or alcohol. And so on. It has been more than 6 months and we are a lovely, maybe a bit odd, household. I am surrounded by love and gratitude. And so much humor. They make me laugh every day. They help me always. Both are finally working. They both have grown through this arrangement and so have I. The rest of the family? Not so much. They tolerate Laura but do not embrace her. That's ok. Laura calls me Nanny as do my other grandchildren and introduces me as her grandmother. I overheard her talking to her brother on the phone recently,"...and here, in this home, we have a meal every night!" Yes we do. Yesterday on 9/11 we celebrated Laura's 21st birthday. She said it was the best birthday she's ever had. Oh my... And God is good.

Got "moved sideways" /demoted in my job. Discouraged, angry.

The birth of William. I was immediately completely smitten. Sam and I are so in love. William is so full of quiet joy and contenetment and brings us laughter and dozens of smiles every day. Alice started kindergarten. She’s a doting, gentle big sister and sores her brother. It’s bittersweet that she’s growing up (so fast). On the second morning of Kindergarten, I crawled in bed before she woke up and laid my head in her chest listening to her little heart and breathing and cried. But I’m also excited and having fun because she’s just thriving and seems to love it. She takes her new responsibilities (like “homework”) very seriously and is giving it her best. She makes us so proud!

The most significant experience of 2018 was buying my new house in Martinez, CA on May 11. I’m very excited about my new house purchase and grateful that I had enough money to buy a three bedroom, two bath house.

I went to Hawaii for the first time. I've always wanted to go but have been reluctant to take a beach vacation because I spent my whole life obese. I'm not anymore. So this was my first vacation not attached to any work. First vacation to a beach-centric location. I went by myself. I hiked for the first time on the Moanalua Middle Ridge and then down the Haiku Steps. I took a boat to see the lava falling in to the ocean on the Big Island. I swam in the ocean in a bathing suit each for the first time in decades. It was such an inspiring, scary, horrible, beautiful, wondrous experience.

Living apart from my husband for over a year while he is away for work in Lagos. I have gone through a range of emotions, but overall feel stronger, both in our relationship and in my ability to keep it together at home with our daughter. Also, getting out of debt, and then being able to travel together as a family to England for the first time. Definitely inspired but ever looking for more inspiration!

I had one of the strangest relationship lessons I've had -- and I've had many. That man I spoke of last year quit contacting me, from one day to the next. I reached out a few times and then decided that for whatever reason he was gone. Five months passed and he posted a picture of himself with a blonde, well put together lady posed as if they were a couple, with the words "She has my heart." Congratulations came from many sides. I was stunned, deeply shocked. Even more when I discovered, as had his college friends before me, that she had a TV show on which he was now "co-host" and it was a religious/ political Trumpist bent. People who have known him for 40 years were as horrified as I was at that thought that this might be the result of a mental break, a brainwashing, or (worse yet) another con. I wrote last year that he was a man of quality. Indeed, parts of him are that man. But other parts seem to be at work as well. I am relieved, in that I feel I have been rescued from a precipice. I regret that I was wrong about him, and I deeply regret that we can't always be friends. How I enjoyed knowing him...the parts he was willing to reveal. I still have hope that there is a stable, mature, truthful, loving partner for me somewhere. I also feel I've learned that, attractive as their creative energy might be, I need a partner who knows himself and has decided who he wants to be and who he wants to have in his life.

I finally completed a work experience that was very toxic and difficult to stay in. I am glad I stayed for the whole two years, as I learned a lot about myself and what I want out of a work place and bosses. I am relieved to have moved on, and the fact that I decided to stay in Mississippi astounds me everyday. I can feel myself already making more of a difference in people's lives and that is truly empowering.

Earlier this year I was diagnosed as having severe adult ADHD. It's been quite a ride that has affected me in so many different ways. First, I was relieved to learn that I have ADHD, an actual brain issue, and that I'm not just lazy and unmotivated to start or finish things. Then, I became sort of resentful about the diagnosis because I didn't want this diagnosis to serve as an excuse for me not doing things or showing up on time or any other things that people say is ok because it's a result of having ADHD. I still want to be the person I always dreamt about being and I didn't want an excuse for not being that person. The diagnosis also came with much disappointment because I thought getting a diagnosis would mean that it would also come with a solution. However, since the diagnosis, I have tried several medications meant to help ADHD sufferers and none of them have any effect on me whatsoever. I am currently testing my 4th drug and hoping that it will help, but it's too early to tell. Through all of this though, I do feel inspired to find ways that I can continue on my path to being the person I want to be... it just may be a different path than I originally thought I would take, but with hopefyully the same destination at the end.

I moved the other half-way across the country, and it was without a doubt the right decision. Coming to California was something I had forgotten I wanted, and even just this short time here has been so much more than what I had before.

A very significant experience for me was going to Conspire, 2018. Seeing Richard Rohr, Barbara Brown Taylor, Barbara Holmes and Brian McLaren was phenomenal. I feel changed spiritually. I will look at embracing the dark places more graciously as the future plays out.

Brazil Camp 2018 was the first time I had ever been to Professor's ranch in Petropolis. I was very much looking forward to it, and I think I had an awesome time. During the trip many things happened that could really have messed up my chi. But I thought about it long and hard and realised that worrying and being upset would only mess up my trip. It left me instead inspired to be part of the Association, and a little unsure of the future - considering I can no longer do a full 10 day camp, or even a relatively easy day of training and not be in pain the next day. I don't know. This is currently what's on my mind. Future self.. you too?

Removal of malignant mass and part of my kidney. I am incredibly grateful that it was found during a lumbar scan and removed while small. I was also blown out of the water when I found out it was malignant.

Karens death this you was probably the hardest thing that we went through. It was challenging to have to face feelings of anger and resentment that she didnt stick to any one protocol in order to cure her disease. There were a lot of feelings of how could this be? why would she die so young? feelings that this is unfair. I was angry at my dad for staying in denial for so long, but felt inspired to show up as much as possible for my family and the individuals in it. collective bonding that we experienced during the end of her life and during the shiva seems to have staying power and the cousins are feeling much more closely knit nowadays.

I moved in with Erin. I'm so grateful we took this step and decided to do this. Our relationship has only grown stronger and I'm happier than ever before.

Wedding! Grateful, hopeful, connected.

I change jobs. Not only changed jobs, but I left the company that I had been with for 12 years and started in an entirely new industry. I'm just a month in so at this point it's hard to say. I mean, my quality of life has improved exponentially. I don't wake up in the morning dreading each day... just some of them. I've learned that even good change is still change and it's still disruptive. In the end, it's going to be a change for the better but I am still struggling to find a new routine, something constant that I can stick to so that I feel grounded.

First year of marriage: the highs of honeymooning (and amazing fireworks and adorable penguins!) and the lows of some arguments and adjusting and stress and moving. But I love our house!

I got married last April 27th!!!! Very happy to married but it is really quite effortless since the man I married is a good man and my best friend. I feel grateful to have him in my life.

My divorce was finalized a couple of months ago and I am relieved that it is over but trying to navigate the relationship with her and her new fiance and with my kids are challenging. But I know I am doing things right and can walk away from situations with my head held high.

I continue to be amazed at how unaware I have been about sexism and racism. This isn't really an event, but it is significant. It has made me feel a little stupid for not knowing how bad these problems are, but also grateful to have this opportunity to educate myself and act in the world.

My husband has revealed to me that our financial position is precarious. I am resentful that he has made some reckless decisions in the past and let it get to this point. I'm also angry at myself for letting him keep me in the dark for so long.

I fell in love with a man who has a child. I met his child in February and I have since fallen in love with this little boy. He is the sweetest, most rambunctious little boy I’ve ever met. His mother is not involved in his life and I would never want to replace her but I would love for him to look to me as a mother figure. I would do anything for that little boy and I hope he knows how much I love him.

Saying yes to Bruce. It helped me recognize that I could be happy without children and would be happy without children. Also, how much and how deeply I love this man. Also, that life is too short and I’m not his babysitter. I am grateful that I got to a place of yes and am also sad for Bruce that he is still so broken and so limited.

We went east for Xmas for the first time in about 15 years. We'd avoided it for so long because we didn't want to get the children confused about religion. But now they are all teenagers and suddenly we wanted something else -- for them to experience Christmas with the Catholic side of the family. It was an epic experience. I was so grateful to be able to take all of us, and to have Christmas with Nancy and Dave and Jill and the girls. I can't remember the last time we were together so relaxed, for so long. We hung out in their living room the night before Xmas, playing a trivia game the girls had made up, and it was so lovely. It really felt like family. It was also wonderful to wake up Christmas morning in Syracuse, and then to go to Nancy's and have everyone put on their Xmas PJs. So fun!! I would like nothing more than to do it again next year, but I don't know how that would work. Thinking about it....

The deaths of my brother-in-law and my mother-in-law within a month - serious illness in my own mother as well. All took a toll and it's led me to see many more cracks in people ---as well as huge gratitude for the blessings I have in my family. I have learned that at some point, unfortunately even with family, you may have to let go of the toxic relationships when someone doesn't care to help herself.

At first I thought this question would be a good time to talk about getting accepted to Yale, but another experience came to mind. While drafting my first English 120 essay with Cathy Shufro, I brought about the potential topic of my relationship with the participants and staff members with autism at Kutz this summer. Even though they were extremely annoying most of the time, which is a fairly sad thing for me to say, I didn’t receive the proper training to make the experience meaningful. Take living with Francis Iaconnetti, for example. At first, it was harming and a little charming. he would come over and say goodnight to me, Asher, and Adm each night. Slowly, things fell off. He would scatter his stuff all around his bathroom — I eventually moved everything to a shelf where it (mostly) stayed. he would talk wit us and say “boys? boys? boys?” louder and louder until we responded. He won a stuffed snake and, for the only time he made his bed all camp, tucked him in. These strange anecdotes are endless. William had a similar amount of quirks. Once he started talking, he wouldn’t stop. I once said hi to him in the lobby and he followed my down the hallway, up the stairs, into my room, and continued talking after I shut the bathroom door. Michael was a gem, a true ball of joy. Except he avoided work at all costs and played into people’s low perception of him. Atom had a designated spot in the lobby where he’d watch cartoons all day. Whenever I talked to one of them, we wouldn’t connect — they were just on a different level. It was like speaking to a foreigner. All of the subtext and associated meaning beyond the words was lost. It was a whole different form of communication. One which often felt felt frustrating and fruitless. In future encounters of this caliber, I hope to go in with an open mindset; not cast negativity, distaste, or contempt; and attempt to craft a meaningful, mutually beneficial relationship. These interactions shouldn’t just fill up a quote book. 9/12, 1:00 AM, Bass Library into my bed

I got a job as a full-time outpatient therapist! I am incredibly grateful and feel like I am doing G-d's work every day.

Me mudei para Belo Horizonte. Acho que foi bem significante, mudanças geralmente são... Eu esperava mais, na verdade, mas está sendo uma boa experiência. Eu queria que meu pai estivesse feliz.

I raised $10,000 on Kickstarter to get my book published. It was a huge thing - I had so much doubt, and went into a panic on more than one occasion. I am so fortunate to have a gigantic network of people who supported me. I worked my ass off, and hit my goal, so now my book will be a reality! It is the cornerstone for my plan for world domination. Taking over with kindness is a beautiful thing.

I have taken care of two aging cats. I love them so I feel like they are my family. It's been hard, for me emotionally with medicines, fluids, specials foods, and the vet. I feel the strain of taking care of all of this.

I went through a breakup. It was extremely painful. It was sad but overall, I genuinely believe it was the right decision. I still have difficulty with the decision 9 months later. A close friend of mine (Mike) helped put things into perspective: Every (good and bad) experience in life makes a sound. As time goes on, that sound becomes an echo and fades. You can renew that sound by recalling the memory. I was continually "re-hitting the gong" and renewing my pain every time I spoke about the breakup and it was preventing me from healing. I've been trying to not hit the gong and it seems to be helping. I am grateful for friends like Mike who can be a confidant and sounding board.

I am grateful to having a place in the world to be at peace with the world and myself every part of the year.

I failed my first college class. It was infuriating to be not doing well at something I wanted so desperately to be good at for my whole life. It made me rethink my plans and my motives. I realized visualizing myself doing something was not the only thing that would get me closer to my goal. And now, now I am taking things at my own pace. I am afraid of moving too slowly but also afraid that if I move too fast I'll outpace my own limits. So for now I am moving at what feels like a snail's pace and do not feel like I'm accomplishing anything.

My only child graduated high school and moved to college this year. After living in Atlanta for the past four years, she has chosen to go back to Michigan for college and I have chosen (for now) to hang out in Atlanta. I feel very untethered. In some ways, it's exciting and freeing, but in other ways, it's unnerving and ungrounding. What do I do with myself now? She is still a responsibility as her father refuses to pay tuition while she is in Michigan, but I can live anywhere I want - go anywhere I want. I feel excited and lonely at the same time. Relieved and non-useful. Free and aimless. I hope by the time I read these answers back next year, I'll be on one side or the other of this fence.

I started a 1-acre organic farm in Sonoma County, CA. I began working as a Jewish nonprofit employee as well. It affecting me by showing me that taking challenges one at a time and thinking through them will help you overcome them. Asking your community for help will also aid in your success. I'm grateful that it worked and sort of am waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's been such a feat to see this farm in it's glory!

I started a new role at work, changing from Access Roads to Project Engineering. It feels so much more like the job that I was supposed to have. I love that so many days feel like I'm back in school and that the work that I do directly leads to the stewardship of the system. I love the comradery of the people that I work with and have realized the negative feelings that were building up in my old group.

I realised the power of positivity, i experienced the manifestations of happy thoughts and deliberate feeling good. I realised the power of this universe and it's undivided attention to the well being of everyone. I am grateful and I am inspired to be aligned.

I finished Remote Year. I didn't choose to go home back to America, and have lived between England and Spain for the last nine months. I'm happy, relieved to be out of Trump's America, and excited about what the future holds.

This year I got married. It was a pretty happy day - it went so smoothly both my husband and I were very surprised how well it all came together. I am grateful and relieved that it went well, and very grateful to hear that all those we invited had a great time. One of my new year's resolutions was to not stress on the day and I am so glad!

Possibly the most significant experience of the past year was my family’s adoption of a puppy! I was not thrilled with the idea for a long time, but when it came down to it, *I* was the one who pushed the button and made it go. I’m so glad we’ve got her, even though she is exactly as much trouble as anyone has ever said a puppy might be (still going strong at age 1!). She’s changed the tone and tenor of our household, provides comfort and companionship, and keeps us all on our toes. Maybe we’ll get her a friend next year.

Getting robbed at gunpoint, experiencing an earthquake, then mistakenly believing my partner may have had a heart attack, in the space of two weeks. It shook me to my core and helped me understand that "mental health" is a real - and very underrated - concept. Although my path to recovery was paved with resentment and self-pity, I learned a great deal about myself along the way and am deeply grateful for the experience.

I moved ahead on the process of leaving my husband. He doesn't know yet. I am terrified of his reaction when he receives the summons and dread his attentions and efforts to be sweet. I am continually waiting for the post to arrive. Whenever he doesn't answer a text immediatly or replies brusquely I worry that today is the day. No wonder I started smoking again. I have however never wavered in my decision to leave and dream of the day it will be just me and the kids

I got this question on the first day of Roshashana. I was thinking about the year that past and thought that the most significant experience was the Bar Mitzvah we had for my son. It was a wonderful event and he prepared well for it and I was so proud that I was able to arrange such a celebration for him with all his friends and our family. Of course, I didn't get a chance to write this up on the first day so on the second day of Roshashanah (Tuesday Sept. 11th!), I got the news that made this day the most significant day of the year for me. My father passed away. It is interesting that just the day before during the service, I prayed that he will be relieved of the suffering he was under. He had been bedridden for more than a year and worse, he could no longer talk and mostly slept. It was such a painful thing for me to watch a strong, loving, good hearted man laying there with all the tubes hanging from him and in dippers. I know he didn't want that so when he passed away, part of me was happy to see him not be like that anymore. At the same time, it has been so hard for me and my mom and brothers to see him go.

My sweet nephew, Everett John, was born on August 24th. Tragically, he also died on August 24th. What should have been the best, most exciting and joy filled day, quickly became the worst day of my life. In the blink of an eye, my whole world changed and my heart was shattered. Everyday since, I've been trying to honor his brief life and his memory by being a kinder, more compassionate person. I want to live a life that would make him proud and I intend to live everyday for him. I can't describe just how much I love him and miss him constantly and even though he isn't here physically, he will always be in my heart and a part of everything I do.

Around this time last year, I moved across the country to San Diego. I had mixed feelings at first. I was turned off by the congestion, heavy reliance on freeways, and lack of motivation I saw around me. I was so happy to be by the beach, though, in perfect weather, trying something new. It inspired me to go out on a limb and try out a totally new career. I slightly resent that since it hasn't worked out. I'm frustrated with the results of that, and I think that has affected how I see the entire experience.

I was promoted to Design Lead for a major project, and just a few weeks ago submitted my last RFC plans. It's crazy to see what I accomplished in just one year, and I learned a lot of management skills throughout the process. Now to watch it get built over the next four years!

During the past year, I changed units at work. I got to move to a more welcoming environment. My new boss appreciates my knowledge, he supports my work, and treats me like he wants me to be here. It changes everything. It makes me want to do a good job and makes me want to be at work. It makes all the difference and I am grateful for this. I have had the opportunity to apply for promotions, but have chosen to stay in the unit simply because it is amazing to be treated with respect and as if my work is worth something.

My second son was born, and while his birth was incredibly traumatic, everything since has been wonderful. I'm glad that I didn't have to hold onto my birth story and let it overshadow the experience of welcoming a second child into our home.

After years and years (and years) of wishing and waiting and hoping, we were finally able to adopt a beautiful baby girl. <3 She was 3 months old when she came into our lives, and now we are just the happiest little family of three. There have been lots of changes and lots of challenges, but I truly cannot imagine life without her now.

So many significant things happened in my life in the past year: I married my partner of 7 years, moved to a new country, and made a big career change. I feel incredibly grateful, most of all to myself for being willing to take big risks—something I rarely do—and to my partner for being game for them. I want to continue trying new things, even if they terrify me, because I've now seen how valuable it can be.

My aunt is dying slowly of ALS. She was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. This summer my five-year-old daughter and I spent 5 continuous days with her, and with my cousins (her daughters) and their children. She is a very unique person - so kind, so joyful, so generous of spirit, and I am eternally grateful to have had this time with her. We have never been especially close because her family never lived very close to mine. As a child, I only got to see her once or twice each year, and those visits were usually filled with lots of other family members. But this visit afforded us a lot of one-on-one time or time in a small group, and it was so moving to see how she is choosing to live her life as it comes to an end, how full of love and grace she remains despite her disease. I hope that I get another chance to be with her before she becomes unable to speak, but whatever happens, I am forever changed and opened by her presence in my life.

Last November, I completed a beit din and mikvah and became officially Jewish. While the day itself was a blur, the momentum surrounding the day had such an impact on my personal and family life. I have been living Jewishly for several years, but taking the leap (literally into the mikvah- ha!) was like a whole new story began. The way I experience holidays, engage in community prayer, and even interact with other humans- both Jewish and not- is all new. I feel thankful to have found this path and also feel a whole new level of stability and ease that I never imagined for my life.

In the past year (almost exactly a year ago) I met my partner. It happened when I wasn't expecting it, or looking for anything. I was beginning to trust and like my loneliness. I've had many successful friendships in my life but this was my first romantic relationship and it felt so easy. The first time I've exchanged love with an intimate partner. It's been a year and I'm still awe-struck and proud and a little afraid but in a calm way.

My answer was that each of my four granddaughters is having a significant, turning point in their lives! Elayne got married and I felt so privileged, that I got to attend the reception, thanks to Robyne's friend, Rosie, and PROUD of both Robyne and Elayne at their poise and graciousness. And, pleased that James said that he was happy he had a new grandmother! Nicalina and her cat, Turtle, have left home and moved to her own apartment in Virgnia Beach. She has awondeful new job at Areo a head hunter job. She is doing well and should soon be making 50 grand a year. I love hearing of her progress from her mother, Alayne . I loved telling Lois of Nics advise to one of her clients. Kassidy has started High School. She does not really care for school. She has matured so much that the last two times I saw her I did not, at first,recognize her. My heart goes out to this little girl! Addie has a new passion of diving and also tried out for Junior Ninja Warrior. I received the best BD gift a grandmother could receive when we went to diving practice and the coach could not say enough good things about Addie. I wrote another version of this question which got lost. I constantly hit wrong places on this screen.

This year, it has to be my first date (and subsequent dates) with my first true girlfriend and long-term (if we can call it "long-term" at roughly a year since that first date in a couple weeks) relationship. Being in a relationship of this quality has significantly impacted my general and daily outlook on life, and I'm so grateful for that shift, and for the comfort that this relationship has brought me. One might call it a relief as well, though I recognize that despite how much time passes, I must go out and continue to earn the relationship each day.

I lost my elevated position at work. I was very angry at the time as no reason was given nor was it handled well. I was left in a state of perpetual loss and had no answers to give others when inquired. As time has passed I am settling into my new position that appears to have different responsibilities but less stress may turn into a blessing that was not seen at first.

The Anonymous Letter. I was hired by a College October 2017 to work as a major gift officer. I shared the news of Facebook and LinkedIn. I was thrilled to be going back to higher education- and frankly was thrilled that someone really wanted me. My plan was to start the job 11/6 but planned to attend a staff retreat in late October. My new boss asked that I meet early with the head of Human Resources. I went to the meeting prepared to discuss benefits, my start date. I had not expected to hear, “we received a disturbing letter that was sent anonymously to myself and the President.” I was stunned. She went on to read me portions of the letter about my horrible leadership, my treatment of people, I created constant chaos and I’d had an inappropriate relationship with a student. I was speechless. Some of what the letter said was true - I was a difficult person to work for. I was demanding, I was constantly moving and changing how we operated. I had staff members who did not like me. We were, however, incredibly successful. My new position did not require my supervising staff which was one of the attractive parts of the job. The biggest concern related to my inappropriate relationship with a student. I had fallen in love with a young woman who had worked in my office as a student and then as a contract employee after she graduated. Our relationship began months after she had graduated and worked for me. I had no idea of her attraction to me not mine of her until early October 2010. However, I recognize the perception our relationship of being inappropriate. It was not one that occurred from a power position or my taking advantage of her. I was required to seek more personal recommendations to address the President’s concern over hiring me. My former HR Director talked to my new colleagues assuring them I was a good hire. I had to wait to know if I would still have a job. I left for my vacation to a working ranch shortly after the staff retreat. I was 70 miles from the nearest town with no cell service and limited access to email. I spent the next 6 days on a horse, riding in the most beautiful country while moving cattle and horses to their winter homes. I spent little time thinking about the letter or my employment predicament. Mid-week I received notice that my offer was not rescinded. Oddly I felt neutral - I was relieved but the peace I felt on vacation erased much of my self-doubt and fear. I was no longer angry, hurt and afraid. Something spiritual shifted inside me during that week on a horse in the mountains. The awesome expanse of wilderness and beauty reminded me that I was going to be ok. My higher power would have my back. I am still working on the belief that I am enough - that will be a lifelong journey.

As I read my Patriarchal Blessing a line stood out to me that has changed the way I look at trials, tribulations and afflictions. the line says that my Heavenly Fathers knows that He can depend upon me. Wow...He knows I can do it - in fact, in His eyes, I've already done it. Now I just need to go do it - change my thinking, go through my experiences, accept His will in all things because -I've already done it.

The birth of my first grandchild. I am so grateful and so to the moon in love. I have become so aware that we must make our world better so that these children can grow up and thrive and not be afraid. I must do my part.

The birth of my first grandchild. Beyond grateful. Humbling.

Spent 2 years procrastinating on planning the details of my trip to France and Italy with my brother. He did the travel agent type research and bookings with references from me. Somehow I didn’t think the trip would happen but be postponed another year. But we finally decided we needed to do it this year before I couldn’ t walk or participate as much as I wanted. I am happy we are doing this; grateful my brother is accommodating my pace; and intrigued by the changes in places I am revisiting but am also inspired by the new world I have discovered.

I moved into my new home shortly before the high holidays last year, but it's been a very significant experience to me to build a home that is what I want. It is the home I am in alone after the end of my marriage, and it's calm, peaceful, beautiful and just what I want for my living space. When I'm having a hard time and need to ground myself in gratitude and the wonderful things in my life, it is often where I start: if I am there I look around me with a sense of marvel that it is mine. It represents my deep desire to stay in New York and surviving and thriving post-divorce.

I went on a wanderers-gatherers trip for the first time, after planning to do so for several years. It was an amazing experience! Both the trip itself and the very decision to take it. I've been trying to adopt some of the insigts I got from it into my daily life - quite challenging...

This year I left my job, my apartment, my friends, and my girlfriend in New York to move to Israel. I am happy I did -- I was deeply unhappy in New York and moving here gave me an opportunity and fresh start to decide what I wanted in my life and out of my life. I feel my old self coming back.

The most significant event for me this year has been the overdue retirement of the overbearing, petty, jealous, mean, incompetent office manager at my firm. She has been here for the entire sixteen years I have worked here, and the day she left was the greatest day of my professional life. It really feels as if I will be able to divide my career into two epochs: before her, and after her. It's only been a few weeks, so I am still processing it, but the future here at a place that I love nearly everything about, seems ridiculously bright, now that this cancer of a person has been removed. Hooray!!

My boyfriend dumped me. I was sure he was The One. He made me feel ugly and useless. I really spiralled into depression because of him. Now I kinda feel better. I can see that I would have no future with him. However, I'm still wounded and afraid I'll spend the rest of my life alone.

I found out I had cancer in my cervix. I had radiation and chemo then surgery. I am so grateful for my doctor. I am relieved I am back to my regular life. I resent not having my uterus cause I want a child. But I am also Inspired to help others who don’t have the mouthpiece to talk about their cancer struggle.

There is only one thing I could possibly say: meeting KS. He is a sparkling soul. He makes me laugh with my whole body and heart. He expands my mind. I can tell he deeply loves and respects me, and others can tell, too. I haven’t felt this level of connection with someone in a long time. At the same time, I have had to deal with so much anxiety and insecurity in this relationship because it matters so much to me: "something being important to me," filtered through my anxiety brain, translates to "being afraid to lose it, afraid to mess it up." I have worked hard to stay true to my values and use skills and therapy for my anxiety so that I can show up as a good partner to KS and not repeat the mistakes of the past. And... I think it's sort of working! It never stops being hard, but I think it is working. I'm not sure where this will lead, but I know that I love KS and having him in my life has been a gift.

I decided not to renew my contract as Chef de Partie at The Willows Inn on Lummi Island, and rather, begin the journey of consulting and working part time (not in the industry) to keep the lights on while I gathered myself, caught my breath and forged ahead into the space of food education. It affected me in many ways, it was scary (Still is!), it showed me I can reserve energy and passion and that I won't lose myself in my work. It taught me how to let go of part of my ego where it attached to "MY" job and what street cred it held. I am so grateful I have stuck it out and for all those who have encouraged and helped me! I am inspired, scared, excited and encouraged. I know this is the right path and that if I can stick out these first two years, I will have a great chance of making it!

Got back with bae. So much shit before that. Making mistakes. Quitting jobs. Being unemployed for a month. Being left behind and leaving people behind. Learned to trust people less and be less naive, while still allowing myself to be genuine and ‘open’. And don’t lend a new ‘best friend’ $1000 😂

Resentful. Not being accepted for a PhD program has ruined all my plans for the next year. I feel betrayed and stupid, I feel lost and unprotected, I feel like the story that took me here didn't work out the way it should have.

We took in another child to live with us. A friend of my youngest. He came from a rough, painful childhood. Terrible divorce of his parents when he was 8 or 9. Both parents were abusive and neglectful. His mom's abuse and neglect got so bad that his father took him and his brother on as full custody, begrudgingly. Three years ago, when he was 15, his mother committed suicide. He lived with his neglectful father who would leave him alone for weekends or a week at a time with no one looking in on him. Ultimately, he came out to his father and his father kicked him out at age 18. So when we took in this young man, he said for the first time he felt like he was loved and cared for. For the first time, he felt like he had a loving home. This was the most significant event that has happened this year, or ever, to our family. We are blessed to have this fourth child in our life.

I got married! I can't believe it. If you asked me 5 years ago, I would have said I was never getting married, and I was okay with that. After a bad relationship, I didn't believe there was a such thing as a partner who would respect and love me, who would make my life even better than it was. And then, Joel and I found each other. He makes me so happy, and loves my weird, dorky self. I love him so much - I love his weird, dorky self. We don't complete each other, in that we're full people on our own, but we make each other the best possible versions of ourselves. Our wedding day was amazing, but more than that, being married to this man, and having him as my partner in life, is the most incredible, calming but exciting, smile so big my face hurts feeling in the world.

I had a miscarriage in December 2017. I think it was pretty impactful because I never really saw it coming; I had never had any issues with fertility or pregnancy before. However, I was so grateful for the kindness of the Lord. There were little things that helped me to "prepare" my heart and my thoughts and orient my view of the whole situation. I know that my God is good and He is faithful. I know that he knows best and ALL things work together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose. What a great purpose to have held this soul as it was preparing for heaven.

Something pretty significant that happened this year centered around my sister Cheyenne. She has spent a significant chunk of this year dealing with the repercussions of her actions, dealing with the court system and living in jail for some time. It was difficult to manage at first, but it might be one of the best things to happen to her. I am hoping this snaps her out of her current method of thinking, and maybe helps break some of her toxic dependence on her boyfriend. I hope this helps her regain her sense of independence and self-worth. I hope she flourishes.

The most significant experience I can imagine happened this year. I became a mother. I've always known that I would someday have children, but this was the year I fulfilled my dream. It's hard to imagine life before Ezra. I've never felt such pride and joy. But I've also never been so challenged in my relationships with others and my relationship with myself. I am so grateful to be able to bear children (and to have gotten through pregnancy relatively easily). I'm a completely different person now than I was just a year ago. My priorities have vastly shifted. I'm proud of who I am as a mother, I was born to do this.

So many significant experiences: Finding a new community Finding a new home Bringing a new life into our home All have been emotional rollercoasters. They have brought us such joy and such pain. they have opened us up to new ideas and closed doors. It has truly been an increidble and moving year.

I had a very special trip with my grandparents that live in NY during spring break. It affected me very positively both mentally and spiritually because I don't get to see them very often. I felt inspired because my Grandpa is my biggest role model.

I came out this year as Gender Fluid. It was a culmination of a lot of self exploration and working towards a place in my life where I felt safe, supported, and comfortable enough to be open about who I am. Since then, the most powerful change for me has been the absence of doubt in my life. I still have things I worry about, the future still scares the shit out of me with all of its uncertainty. But for now, I've stopped undercutting my own experience and understanding constantly. I no longer reject my identity and I've found letting go of that has freed me of so many exhausting, paralyzing anxieties I held from wearing that mask. I'm incredibly grateful for the people in my life, they've been far more supportive than I could have ever expected, even those that I'm not super close to. I'm nervous about how the rest of my family will take it, but I'm not going back to being too afraid and ashamed to be myself, no matter what.

I went to Israel with all my friends and got to be with them in our second home. I was so grateful to be able to fly to another country with my friends and be at the most holy place.

Concentrate to study the Tora,It has changed my life. I do not fear of nothing because Adonai is on my side. I am do not longer resentful. I am inspired for the Word of God.

A significnt experience from the past year was getting married to my love. I'm so relieved that we've accomplished that milestone, and I'm excited to see what our future holds. We've got a handle on setting up our household in small ways, by swapping out old dishes and sheets for new, and big, by joining our finances with joint banking, getting on one car/health insurance plan, and making plans for when to start trying to get pregnant. In our day-to-day, not much has changed. We're still rock solid and there for each other, and I am confident we've made the right decision to join our lives together.

Ooof. Stupid question (for the obviousness with which it relates to my circumstances): I just uprooted my entire life, made a cross-country move, leaving behind everything and everyone that I have come to love in the hopes that a better-paying, more-recognizable position might bring me back to a more sustainable version of that aforementioned life. I am a mix of emotions--devastated, grateful, motivated, terrified...

I was let go from a job for the first time in my life. At first I was very upset and felt like a failure. The signs were there showing that my heart was not into working for a large corporate firm. Everyone could tell that I had a bigger "fuck the system" attitude then most and that is bad when you need sheep to run your business. After a while, I was happy that it happened and was able to find a place that does make me happy. Now people appreciate my "fuck you" attitude more where I work now.

Wow, so much has happened....the most significant thing that transpired was the crushing financial insecurity I faced. At one point I was three months behind on rent, and the gas was disconnected. I could only cook with an electric crock pot. I was in a constant state of anxiety. Taking OSL through my church, The Rock South County, absolutely changed my life. I had no choice but to trust the Lord. And it changed my perspective and recreated my entire perspective. It was transformative. I am grateful for the discernment. I was shown what God's vision is for my life; this is a journey of purpose. I am completely inspired. So grateful. Humbled. Blessed.

I completed a 28 day gratitude exercise. It required 28 days of daily meditation and writing about my gratitude for ten things that my heart most desired. It was tough making time to do this every day, but magic came to pass. Almost everything that I focused on came to pass and my spirit was greatly lightened. It was an exercise in prayer and trusting the universe to take care of my prayers. I was feeling desperate and downtrodden before the exercise, and came away from it feeling like life was going to be a positive forward moving adventure, full of mystery and possibility.

"Waking up." It affected me by putting me on my spiritual path and learning that I can transform. I am grateful for it, it's everything to me right now. But at the same time, it is very difficult. Saturn Return.

My experience as an intern in St. Louis. My program focused on helping mostly white, suburban religious communities learn about racism, poverty, and social justice. It was both challenging and fulfilling. I had to work hard to gain confidence, and I now feel much more secure in my ability to lead and nurture growth in others. I connected with strangers who took me in as their own, nurtured my growth, and shared meals with me. In other ways, I'm grateful it's over. I had a terrible experience with one specific supervisor, and I'm glad to be away from a presence that was toxic for me.

I was asked to leave a sales job because I was not meeting sales expectations. I was hurt and embarrassed. Then I was mobilized to find a position where I could serve customers without the sales pressures. I realized I could have done a better job, but they also let me down, without the support I needed to thrive. We just weren't a good fit.

This past year, I was formally diagnosed as having High-Functioning Asperger's Syndrome (even though the DSM-5 categorizes it as PDD-NOS). 15 years ago, I was diagnosed with both Social and Generalized Anxiety Disorder and didn't realize until only this year that my mental health issues were bigger than I previously thought. However, having the diagnosis makes my life make more sense. All the things I knew were not "normal"-- things that others around me called "unique" were part of a larger pattern of social challenges I faced, which fed back to negative-avoidance and anxiety. Most people take this for granted, but it means something when I can know *why* it's so difficult for me to grow from the "real" me to the "ideal" me. At age 36, I'm re-learning who I am and re-navigating my way through the world.

I have become more politically aware. I have always voted and have been active in attending protests for things I believe in; speaking out; research, etc., but the more you know the more you realize you don't know! This new administration has affected my mood, my knowledge base, and my sleep. I am grateful to feel more aware of issues, policy making, and all the nuances of bill making, politics at play, etc., but it is hard on the spirit at times.

You'd think it would be my son being diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, but honestly that hasn't been that big of a shock. Honestly, it might be visiting Japan. I've been overseas before, but never to a place so fully foreign, and never for so long. It's a huge relief to be in a place where I can't read advertisements. It's like being slightly out of cycle with the noise of civilization.

I'm extremely grateful to have studied Talmud in Jerusalem at Pardes this summer. The experience confirmed a lot of what I'm seeking -- more learning and intentional community. I feel like I gained a lot of concrete skills that I want to continue to work on as I move forward in my career.

A major change in my life that has been for the best... I couldn't be more grateful with my kids, JC and life to have put many people that have taught me so much. I can only give Thanks to life, after learning how to forgive myself and looking ahead again. Looking forward to this new chapter in my life

I started my Faces project. I feel inspired and so grateful.

I felt troubled a lot. 011 fell into my world. The cohort -- ABC. I love David, as always.

I want to stay positive but right now resentful and sad are what I am inclined to write about. I am so very grateful and know how blessed we are but my heart has been hurting for my youngest child. She suffers from anxiety and appears to be having seizures again or complex migraines (or both) and is struggling more and more with her reading and writing. We've finally been able to get testing done thanks to an amazing and generous aunt. Hopefully we will get answers to figure out how to make reading easier and more enjoyable. Right now we are home schooling to relieve some of the anxiety in a way to try and avoid triggering more medical incidents as we progress through testing and coming up with a treatment plan. She, understandably, feels upset over what is happening in her body and upset about feeling different than her peers. Life has its ups and downs and I keep reminding her that things never stay the same and that it won't always be hard. I'm not sure she believes me but she's maturing more and more and I'm hoping she'll see that it's okay and that life isn't always hard. I'm hoping she'll feel capable of moving through the challenging times. I resent that her peers are less than supportive. I resent that they are able to handle school. I resent that some are outright cruel to her. I hate that I feel this way and keep trying to move myself away from that particular sentiment.

I lost my mother. It was one of the most life-changing experiences ever. I am grateful for the blessing to be with her, and my soul aches for her early passing. I have felt a multitude of feelings, including grief, anger, sadness, intense pain, longing. I also feel encouraged by the gifts that she has given me. I feel comforted by witnessing her strength, her perseverance, and her love for me.

My younger sister passed away alone in an ICU bed from a septic infection. I am still devastated. I am grateful that I got to be there and hold her hand, brush away an errant tear from her cheek and tell her it was ok to stop fighting if she needed to. She fought so hard to live life everyday with severe mental illness. I feel lucky that I had the time I did with her. I am relieved that she is no longer suffering in a mind and body that did not cooperate.

I almost lost my home, it was tough emotionally, mentally and physically. I'm absolutely grateful for the help I recieved around it and the support I recieved from my wife. I'm more inspired then I've ever been to never let that happen again.

Maybe there have been two experiences but related. My dog got sick out of nowhere and I was scared and worried after a while but my partner's support was key, I am very grateful for everything he did for us and how he was very strong for the both of us. The dog is fine, by the way. Also, I got quite sick a few weeks ago and he took me to the hospital, stayed there with me until they sent me to a room and then he took care of the dog while I was hospitalized. So again I felt very supported and loved and basically like I belong in a family, my little family of three. :)

Moving in with roommates, though I'd done it before. I'm grateful that I get along with my roommates, I'm grateful that they challenge me. I'm surprised I've been able to stand up for myself with them (more with Kelly than with Bethany), and though I haven't been in control of things the way I'd like to have been, I did fairly well.

We had a baby on March 22nd. It has completely transformed my world and worldview and I am trying my best to live well and to provide a good world for Kipka to grow up in. It has taken a toll on my body and my health, but I am also growing new strength and drawing on old disciplines. It has been like a roller coaster. like the front of a train. And still, things are good.

I found out that Mom has a terminal brain tumor, the same one as John McCain who passed away recently. I was surprised, shocked, and depressed. I handled it well at first, then fell into a deep depression. I'm pulling out of it now (9/14), and looking forward to four months off of work to spend with her.

I met Jeevan, he showed me how to be caring towards other people.

The most important thing that happened to me this year was the birth of my grandson. In some ways, it is the most significant thing that has ever happened to me. I have many friends with grandchildren and I have taught ‘parent and me’ classes for over 20 years. But nothing can really prepare someone to be a grandparent, sort of like nothing can prepare a person to become a parent for the first time. Only when I was a parent for the first time, I was tired, anxious and hormonal. And I hadn’t had the life experiences that I have now. This is so wonderful. And honestly, it is a little bit better than being a parent. I am blessed that I am able to provide childcare for my daughter when she works her part-time job. I am also continuing to work my own job. So I am actually pretty tired! But I am very happy, in a way that I never knew before.

Zach and I got married! It was amazing and wonderful and everything I could have hoped for, though my one regret is we don't have enough pictures from the experience. I was a bit stressed during planning, trying to keep costs low but still have it be really beautiful and special for us. I love that we got married in our own backyard; even though this house has many flaws, I will always be so thankful for the space that hosted many special days, and the most love-filled day I've ever experienced. Getting married after having children is so much more special! Zach and I share such deep love, and I think partly because what we feel for each other is amplified by our beautiful children.

Meeting my darling and maturing through my relationship. Learning to be more patient, kind and understanding. Still learning. Instead of resentment for his approach to work and money it motivates me to work on me as an individual. Something I haven’t done in a relationship before.

Our son was born on 9/1. He just turned one and it has been mind-blowing to watch him grow into his own tiny person. I am amazed on an almost daily basis that I can both wholeheartedly love - and feel completely exhausted by - caring for this one individual.

I found a penny, but it wasn't a common one, since i was pretty sure i had lost a penny near the place where i found it, and i thought they were pretty similar. Shamefully, they were not the same penny. I understood how the human brain likes to play with you by making you think you're special or unique, while you are not. I think it made me feel strange.

The days that stand out are days when I took the time and effort to make the day extraordinary in some small way: taking my students on a field trip to see great theater, going on vacation to the beach with my family, stopping by my friend's pond to swim on my way home from work. I feel so lucky to be alive, to have my freedom, my health, and a beautiful environment in which to live and raise my kid. Reaching for the little things that move us toward happiness, a sense of peace, a connection to the world around us: these are the significant experiences for me.

Oh gosh, I think Baby almost dying had a huge impact on me. It reminded me to be present, thankful, loving and compassionate. Life is short and being apathetic and lazy is unacceptable. Do your homework, put in the effort and don't be such a bitch. Find solutions to your problems and be very thankful for everything you have.

I think my best answer is motherhood. I didn't start being a mother this year, but it sort of feels like I'm constantly hitting the reset button, with slightly more sense of what to do each time I see my 23 month old. He is so strong-willed and full of emotions, so when he gets upset (mostly when we say "no" or take something from him that he was enjoying), his feelings seem almost too big for his little body. When he rages or screams, I feel myself starting to cry, like I did when he cried as an infant. His emotions feel so tightly wound up with mine. But I don't cry now. I hold it together, because I'm his mother. I'm the adult. I'm really trying to be the adult. Being his mom is exhausting. He's always simultaneously pulling away, and holding tighter to me. He wants to learn about the world, but he also seems to want to be with me, in a more conscious and loving way, than he did before. Before it seemed more like a reflex. He wanted me for biological reasons. Now it feels like more of a choice. He wants me. Me. As a person. It's a masterful design, this parenting thing. I am so motivated to help him, and the weight of that can be crushing.

My youngest child graduated from high school and left home. I am enormously proud of both my children-- they are compassionate, whip smart, energetic, diligent and hilarious. They will be global citizens who make a difference. My pride is mixed with a bittersweet longing and almost shock. I can not believe that my years of active day in/day out parenting went by that quickly.It was hard, and ugly and incredibly draining at times but honestly, I loved getting to know two such amazing people and having so many partners in my village to raise them. I am grateful and a bit adrift until I find my new daily anchor. They will always be my strongest connection in life.

After 15 years at Hostelling International, my position was eliminated. I found out on Friday the 13th, and I was stunned. After the shock wore off, they offered to create a job for me, job security. At my age, that was tempting. They also had a very generous severance package. I was torn, but ultimately decided to leave, find another path. I was nervous, but was supported by friends, family and a job coach. I was worried that at my age it would take a long time to find a new job. And I was often angry - how could they trip a long-term employee like that? Ultimately, I have been grateful. I found another job, and in retrospect realized I was very unhappy, frustrated and bored. I took a chance and I feel like I was the winner.

My oldest daughter and I were able to travel with her high school theater dept. to England and Scotland for 10 days. While there we visited London for 3 days and saw Othello performed at the Globe Theater, which was an amazing experience. While in London we were also able to tour the Tower of London and Westminster Abbey, along with the National Theater and the Globe Theater. We also saw The Play That Goes Wrong at the West End. We traveled by bus to Edinburgh where we stayed at the dorms at Pollock Hall on the University of Edinburgh campus. The kids were a part of the American High School Theater Festival and were performing during the Edinburgh Festival Fringe. Everything about the performing experiences - from rehearsals to their pitch performance on the Royal Mile to their four performances - were amazing experiences for the kids. It was so much fun to be a part of the group and watch the kids really shine on stage. Besides the theater things, we got to tour Edinburgh Castle and see the Royal Military Tattoo at the castle. We also took a bus one day and went up to St. Andrews and wandered around town for a couple of hours then went to Falkland and toured the summer palace there. There were so many experiences, it's hard to recount them all here. But I am so grateful that I was able to take part in this experience with my daughter. Watching her on stage was especially heartwarming for me as it was her only theater performance during high school. Seeing all the history and spending 10 days in Scotland were really a balm to my soul. I loved just wandering the streets, talking to people, and getting to see so many different cultures and peoples all represented in one place. I also go to see my friend, Meg, for a little bit while we were there and that was really wonderful. I hadn't seen her for 12 years! When we finally got on the plane and were on our way, I was so relieved. We'd worked all year fundraising for the trip and put a lot of hours into raising money and also the kids' getting prepared for their performances. All the many hours and hard work were all worth it. It is an experience I will never forget and am so grateful I was able to have and share with my daughter.

going to detroit on a trip with school. I think it was extremely eye opening and an incredible experience. Its helping me to start ask questions about how I can have a positive impact on local communities, and has pushed me further from the idea that people in America are separated and opposite, rather that we all see issues arise in our own personal communities, and focusing on how we can help those around us is the most important and impactful thing we can do.

The year of the 'the burnout', where I got to know my limits, felt like I had to say goodbye to everything that defined me and it was still not being enough to recover. Also the year that I had to move back in with my parents, because I could no longer work. Even though it has been, and still sometimes is, hard I am absolutely grateful. It has been valuable time to reconnect with myself, get in touch with my needs and dreams. It has been a "ctrl-alt-delete" for my life that finally taught me how to take care of myself, all of me, not just my basic needs. It gave me room to discover what I find important, what makes me happy and to discover and uncover parts of myself that I had paid no attention to prior. I am also grateful for the support I've received and the professional help available to me that helped me work through past trauma's.

Once again, the failure of one of my employees had a big impact on me and has ultimately helped me get a lot clearer about what I know to be true and what I want. I got the good fortune to hire a post-doc last year, and he seemed charming and capable at first, and then lapsed into doing almost no work. I tried to use more 'managerial' tactics on him, like having him write up work plans and weekly summaries of his work--but they just didn't work. And it took me quite a while to see what the real problem was. I couldn't stand to give him direct and unequivocal negative feedback on his performance, and direct orders (with consequences) for his lack of action. I kept wanting (as I have with my other lamer employees) for that person to take the reins and say 'okay, this is what I'm going to work on to earn my keep and show that I'm worth what I'm paid,"--and he didn't. He just barely made plans and never made 4DX goals and barely shared his work with me--and it was awful! I wanted to kill him, and yet wasn't fully honest with him b/c I was afraid he would do EVEN LESS if I were hard on him. But really that was a cop-out. Ultimately, I'm grateful for what he taught me about needing to own my own knowledge and sense of what a 'good job' looks like, and to require that of others. And to know I can handle their reaction, whatever it might be. They can get mad, be defensive, threaten me, quit--it's okay. That was a big learning experience for me. And that I don't have to be perfect in order to ask for work from others. (This has also haunted me over the years and totally held me back from asking enough from others & getting my needs met.) I think I used to think that my needs and requests were not legit, but now I think they are!

My boss changed jobs about a year ago. I was surprised and sad, but this sparked a decision to begin reconnecting with past colleagues and new potential teammates which I really enjoyed. Additionally, my teammates and I began working more closely together as a result and I was able to find a new confidence in my leadership abilities while learning to better connect our teammates together.

My experiences specifically have been life changing I'm sure but this year I have come to an understanding with myself that I am what I am. To, learn and continue to learn and accept that I will need to manage myself. To trust myself in that management. and to reach out naturally in connection. That I am a visual artist and need to trust and put this truth out to the universe to see how it all plays out. That I am or can learn to be a good partner with someone and share a life together. and that i am, good. I am grateful for the times when I believe this, relieved to have a door to open to these truths, resentful of myself for blaming others for so long thinking they blocked my happiness and that it has taken til now see it in a deeper way and inspired, daily, if i slow down, stop judging and love myself, my breath, others and their breath.

I applied and was accepted to a graduate school program so that I can work toward a Master's Degree in Transformational Psychology. I was so excited -- it took a lot of work, motivation and I had to overcome lots of worries and insecurities to do it. It felt amazing. I am grateful, relieved AND inspired. I can't wait to get started.

Had knee surgery Oct 3, 2017 Grateful

Im greatful for geting a picture with Anat Hoffman! We both wore our women of the wall talit and its a picture that inspires me to be more generious,caring, helpful and to stand firm for what i belive.

Hey Past Adam - Guess what!? YOU PROPOSED TO HANNAH YOU GOON! And she said yes!!! You're gonna marry the moon! You got down on one knee in an icy thermal footbath in Iceland and convinced the love of your life to accept that ring you had made from the Gem and Mineral Show. Every part of getting engaged was incredible. I remember making plans with Usir to help me navigate the gem show, where I would hopefully be able to afford a ring that Hannah deserved. I remember the first time I saw her band and falling in love with everything about it - its shape and dimensions and little spider-eye diamonds as Usir called them. I remember taking the receipt for the down payment home and being so nervous about casually hiding it from Hannah that it took me way too long to notice that she had cut and dyed her hair that day. I remember texting Usir about it and vowing that I would tell Hannah this story within minutes after proposing and that it would be funny by then. I remember picking up the ring at Usir's parents' place and being concerned about the shape of the setting, but loving it anyway. I remember hating the large, rust-coloured ring box it came in and knowing it wasn't good enough. I remember shopping for the perfect discrete ring box, and customizing it on Etsy, and then timing the delivery to arrive while Hannah was out of town at a T-Swift concert. I remember packing it in my luggage and praying to Satan that nothing happened to that bag on the flight to Reykjavik. I remember nervously and excitedly fitting it into my back pocket when I got dressed that morning in Iceland and not being able to get out the door fast enough. I remember stopping for lunch beforehand at what was apparently "Iceland's oldest restaurant" - a little pub on a wharf. I remember seeing the Kvika footbath for the first time and my heart racing as we took our shoes off. I remember realizing too late that I would have to find some sort of conversational segue to asking Hannah to marry me, which I hadn't planned for. I remember starting that segue and then having to pause while I waited for Hannah to finish putting her shoes on, which she had started doing in the middle of my pitch because I guess she didn't realize this was happening. I remember opening the box and getting on one knee while Han asked me what I was doing. "Hannah Mae Teplitsky, you're weird and I like you. Will you marry me?" I remember she said yes, and everything was perfect. <3 Hey Future Adam - YOU BETTER NOT HAVE FUCKED THIS UP YOU GOON!

Earlier in the year, after having decided that I needed to change something in my life and after having read about the topic in various books, I started to begin each day with a mindfulness meditation practice. At this point I am doing it every morning for 20 minutes, and it has changed the day I approach every day and me as a person for the better.

I changed career paths. For the 5th time I forged my way into a career that many doubted I could gain access to. And for the 5th time, it has all began to crumble. I feel like I am out of ideas on what to do to achieve a fulfilling career that I enjoy. I’m frustrated and devastated and sick. I won’t give up. But this is how I feel.

Deciding to take a stand-up comedy class was such a wonderful decision! It was something that really helped free my create soul and allowed me to start to looking at the world in a new way. It also opened up so many possibilities for how I can express myself artistically. I also realized how easy it is to make friends in the comedy world since you're starting out by being very honest and vulnerable with each other.

I had two gender-affirming surgeries this year. Each time I was worried going in, and it's been a massive relief afterwards. I'm super happy with the results and I feel like I'm able to live my life in a better way than I ever have before. The FFS and abdomenoplasty were huge things, and also had significant downtime afterwards to learn more things about myself and how I work.

My ex husband reached out and apologized for how much he hurt me at the end of our marriage. He has been willing to talk about what happened and listening to me when I get angry when I remember something that was said or done. I am really grateful we have been able to get past the anger/bitterness/resentment and interact with each other in a positive way in front of our daughter. It's made both of our lives easier.

My cousin Gary died this July. We were only 9 months apart. It had affected me more than I had thought. The last 10 years or so we grew apart. I regret that. I am now going to write and/or call those I love yet have grown apart. I believe they all deserve to know that how I feel about them, that I love them.

I tried to kill myself in late November last year. I was alone in a hotel room, and I couldn’t bear the pain that was in my chest any longer. So I wrapped an iron cord around my neck. I returned from Las Vegas and cried in agony the whole flight I was awake. I landed, and called Mum, and told her I needed her to be ok without me. I couldn’t stay alive just for her anymore. I lent against a wall and just sobbed in agony. She begged me to just come to see her one last time, and I agreed. Later in London, on that trip I promised Mum, Anna asked me if I was glad I hadn’t completed. I said no. I absolute wasn’t glad. And that was the truth. I have felt so fragile since that night. I feel like some of the strength in my skin and bones has left me, maybe for good? I guess you can’t go through so much trauma and come back 100% whole. How did it affect me? I’m still alive and the dark storm of December and January has most certainly passed. But I think I’m still in mourning, still recovering, still a bit fragile. I didn’t realise this was a phase of recovery, this long tail of not feeling quite ok, but I know that I’m in a better place to recover more fully. I’m not sure though that I’ll ever be the same again.

Since I didn't do this for 5778, I'll include Isabella's birth here, June 25, 2017. It was a rather traumatic event. Nothing happened as I had planned, and I wasn't ready for that, or for actually having a child. I don't know what I really thought I was doing. After a surgical birth, breastfeeding was painful, slow to start, and took a ton of stamina. It wore my sense of security down. But I persevered and, 14 months later I am still nursing! I love it now. That leads to a significant experience in the last year - deciding to be at home with Isabella instead of working full time. I am so grateful for the privilege I have to make this decision. Getting to be with Isabella almost 100% of her waking hours so far has been a wonderful experience. I love her so tenderly and I delight in her development. I love having a ton of home time, too. I am very lucky to be able to afford, however slightly, this experience.

Starting uni. It has been stressful. I have felt pulled in a zillion different directions. But I have been reminded that I can do this if and when I put my mind to it.

My brother died by suicide. I am angry and sad and pained and upset and confused.

Naomi died in May this past year. I was really sad when Mom and Dad told me. I was also in shock. I remember my mouth dropping open, unable to believe it. Naomi. She was so full of life. So happy, so cheerful, and she could talk your ear off if you let her! Which I often did, because I'm a good listener, and I loved Naomi. I really couldn't (and perhaps still can't) believe that someone so full of life could leave this earth. Now, it's true she had cancer and that I never saw her at her worst, so I didn't know how bad it could get and how one event could be the last event. But still. I still thought I had more time with her. And then Laura G passed and then I really thought about my parents' own mortality and how many truly good years we'll have left with them.

Coming home. The reintegration of the old with the new. The understanding of all that is me and all that is not. I feel more at peace than ever before with the releasing that I've done. And I feel more free to be myself. More fully than ever before. To do what feels right and to not worry what others think of that. There is some gratitude for all that I have gone through in this year, but more than that there is a sense of peace. Of resting in the work I've done., because I've done a lot. I feel calm in the acknowledgement of my gifts but anxiety at the thought of offering them. That is my challenge for this year. And knowing that there is no other choice than to move forward. Because if I stagnate in fear I will prevent myself from fully being me, and offering me in service.

I have lost 59 lbs this past year. I am so proud and inspired to find ways to live a healthier life, not just in my body but also in my mind. I never want to go back to the heavier self. I have SO much more energy now - I am SO proud of myself and so excited to share this with the world.

I can't think of one significant event, just ongoing minor events usually related to my daughter. It causes me to feel grateful, inadequate and frustrated all at the same time.

I have been looking for answers since I started traveling nursing. Questions for myself, like if I was actually enjoying myself, how long I would continue, if I ever truly thought of one place as home, and what is was gaining from this experience. During my assignment I woke up one day and I just knew that I was done and that I knew where home was. After I was done with this assignment and was driving back across the country, the manager I worked for called me and offered me a job.

I am grateful that I didn't quit and kept pursuing both jobs, even though at times I felt scared, incompetent, and overwhelmed. I am now stronger and know that I can push through even when things are tough. I learned to better tolerate frustration and imperfection and hold unsertainty with dignity.

Started a new job at 32 Social. Quit at Mancino's, but that was the longest job I was at, Almost 1 year. I am excited to work in a coffee shop now and get to know my coworkers and really grow and develop as a person

This past year, Gramie passed away. It was very diffuclt dealing with her passing and how everyone else was feeling. I feel like this experience brought me closer to my Dad in a way and I am grateful for that. I am more comfterable asking people how they are doing and assuring that they are ok.

We lost our dear canine friend Isabel last October, and this loss is still reverberating through these rooms and those of our hearts. We were wrecked for weeks after it happened; it was nearly unbearable to walk her to the door of death and leave her there on the other side. We went through the textbook stages of our grief; crying at the slightest thought of her, not even able to unfold her leash and collar that I had left the hospital clutching in my hand. I had poured so much of myself into her and felt her absence as an absence of a part of my very self. We stayed tipsy those first few heart-stricken days; then moved into our own kind of rebound mode. We got our fix from everyone else's dog. If it had been up to me, we might have had another dog by now. But David wanted to wait, and now I'm glad we did. Every dog we come across we can hardly keep our hands off of. And our new housemate, Mel, who joined us a month ago, brought with her a lab mix who has a kindred nature to our Bel, who reminds us of her in her gentleness and soulful chocolate eyes. I'm relieved I didn't get to jump the gun. Though there are plenty of dogs out there who certainly could use adopting, it's good for me to experiment with not having a pet to care for, me who has always had a menagerie of things depending on me for their sustenance. It's nice, the independence. We have a shrine to Isabel in our bedroom; her ashes rest in a flowered tin. When I talk about her I still feel weepy. But there's a lift that accompanies the sadness, a newness I feel in myself after shedding some tears. Remembering her bathes me in the sunlight that went everywhere she went. I treasure how easily she comes to life in my mind. And sure, I'm crying because I miss her, and from remembering how painful it was to lose her, but also because, wow, that was some strong stuff we had and it still amazes me the potency of it.

I attended the Summit for Peace and Justice hosted by the Equal Justice Initiative in Montgomery, Alabama. My twin boys went with me as well as a few other teachers and students from our school. I am grateful and humbled to have been a part of this gathering of great minds and thinkers, reformers and injustice fighters. I am facing my own white supremacy and reading and hoping to educate the children in my life differently than I was educated about the history of our country, our politics, our economics, our exploitation of human beings, the Southern terrorism of lynching. Some days I feel overwhelmed with sorrow and shame and anger. But the message that I heard in that hopeful place was to get up and face the day because there is work to be done. I am inspired by the women and men who have walked before me with hope.

I got a place on the doctorate I wanted and received very positive feedback about my performance in the interview. It made me feel more confident and less fearful about taking that step.

I realized this year that I am not very nice. I had always separated this aspect of myself, as if it were someone else. But it's wrong. I'm not only that (not very nice) but I'm still. If at first I was horrified, I realize now that it's a necessary awareness if I want to evolve. J'ai réalisé cette année que je ne suis pas très gentille. J'avais toujours séparé cette aspect de moi-même, comme s'il s'agissait de quelqu'un d'autre. Mais c'est faux. Je ne suis pas seulement cela (pas très gentille) mais je le suis tout de même. Si au début j'étais horrifiée, je réalise maintenant que c'est une prise de conscience nécessaire si je veux évoluer.

I started my Swedish Massage course and realised I could have other dreams, dreams that didn’t relate to my university degree or traveling or other people. New dreams, new futures.

This year I was asked to represent the Jewish Voice as a writer for the "In Good Faith" column in the Colorado Springs Independent and as a speaker on our weekly broadcast, "Conversations of the crossroads of faith." As a Jewish Universalist Rabbi I do not represent the opinions shared by all Jewish leaders let alone all Jews, and I make that clear when necessary. But who does? Jewish Universist thought embraces the idea that there are many ways G.d reveals holiness and all that enhance .the human condition, promote equity and acceptance and make society better are to be celebrated and their wisdom is to be appreciated. This work then, as a writer and radio show panelist is congruent with my Rabbinate, and it's brought with it beautiful and deep friendships.....people who share our Sukkah and our table at Pesach, and people who share their tables and lives with me.

I started therapy this year and marriage counselling. It has not been easy. I struggle to keep my family life running smooth like nothing is wrong. We are keeping all of the sessions a secret right now. I do not want my kids to worry. Some days I feel like nothing will work out.. some days I feel a glimmer of hope. Some days I want to just sleep forever.

Wow! It's been quite a year. I fell and broke my left thumb. I fell again and broke my right radius (or maybe it was my ulna). For eight days I had plaster on both arms. It was difficult, but not impossible. I fell a third time and broke my right ulna (or maybe it was my radius). The two broken arms gave me a total of three months sick leave. Meanwhile, my boss resigned and my position was eliminated. Although I didn't want his old job, I applied but was turned down. I resigned and got a new job that I love. I miss some aspects of the old job, and I miss some of the people, but all in all, the company I work for now is much better. So, to sum up, I'm happier, and a lot less pressured. Finally, I discovered NOOM. I've been on the program nearly three months, and I've already lost more than 30 pounds. I truly believe that this time I will lose all the excess weight, and keep it off.

The experience of my Dad dying five days before our wedding was probably one of the most significant, life-altering moments I'll ever have. I miss him so much - I miss having a sparring partner, I miss him sending me books in the mail, and asking questions about Jewey things. I hate seeing my mom so sad. I don't want him to solidify and harden into a 2D person, when he was so vast and dynamic and transcended boundaries. To go from that kind of pain, seeing him suffer and being with him as he was dying, watching my family suffer like that, and then ascending to the joy and heights of my wedding surrounded by so many beloved people was beyond beyond.

In April I had a cardio-pulmonary exercise stress test. The good new was that I had no obvious pathology. The physician advised me that I did exceptionally well... for someone my age. I found the caveat to a bit deflating, but then realized that it also meant that I am no longer susceptible to early onset of any malady!

I was fired from my job! Despite the fact that I'd been dreading that possibility for quite some time, and knew it could happen, it was still a shock and very demoralizing. I felt like a real loser for a long time. Luckily, I was hired into a new, kind of crappy position but one which pays $9,000 more than my previous job about 10 weeks later. I was also able to do a temp job, for two weeks, in which I received a lot of praise from people. I guess I'm grateful now; if nothing else, I no longer have to fear losing THAT job!

The passing of my great grandmother is the most significant experience that has occurred this year. It was truly heartbreaking standing by her side as she took her final breath. I feel grateful to have experienced life with such a wonderful woman, but resentful that it had to end. I can't complain though, because she lived a long life and was living her best life until the age of 97.

Breaking down crying feeling completely separate and apart from the Jewish community, but then being told (and recognizing) that I am on the "Island of the misfit toys". Although it was painful to recognize, and I am finding a "home" in a place I never assumed I would - I am happy that I am here, and finally feeling content.

I made the decision to move from Idaho to Texas, by myself. I am so happy to be out of the muck of church politics that surrounds the cocoon of the CREC in Moscow. I miss my friends in ID, but am really glad to have moved into my own place, no roommates, for the first time in my life.

I applied to medical school in the past year, and I am still applying right now. I guess that I feel pretty anxious at the moment, since this is something that I am still so unsure of. I am grateful to have started it and to have had so much help along the way, but because it continues on I am unsure of my path going forward.

fired from crappy job. Grateful, relieved, motivated

It seems like there are simultaneously so many and so few options of what I could reflect on here-- the most obvious is all of the movement of this summer, the fact that I now live with these three women and this fat cat. It's too early to feel like I can reflect on the significance of this move in meaningful ways. But the other thing that come to mind is taking Wellbutrin, and I really am both grateful and relieved for that change in my life. There are days where I still think it makes no difference at all, and that I definitely don't need it and might as well be swallowing a sugar pill. There are days when I think it is not nearly enough, and I might as well be swallowing sugar. But most of the time, I think that things are just slightly easier than they were before, and that I have decided to make a decision to make my life better. I want it to feel even more dramatic, to feel like a different person every single day. It's not like that-- it's more that I realize in hindsight that I wasn't panicked about something I would have been worried about in a different year. Being on time! This is the largest one, and that moment at San Tung was the moment I decided to actually take action in my life. It's been a year that has been very full indeed, but not necessarily one that had obvious personal things: I didn't start or leave a job, the characters in my life are more or less the same as they have been for a while now. This question is perhaps also meant to be about significant experiences that might be larger than just me, and I find myself dulled to the horrors of 2018. In some ways, I wish that I were writing about how the reality of children in cages prompted me to action, that I've really seized the opportunity of the moment and plan to change things in my life and in the world. The truth is that I turned off push notifications, and I mostly keep my head down. Twitter is an exhausting place, and I'm realizing more and more that's how I feel about it. It's hard to tell how much of that is complacency and how much of that is survival, and as ever, I want there to be a clear line between the two. I feel very weary in this moment, for a lot of reasons. But I don't actually let the woes of the world into my life very often these days, and I am feeling the weight of it in this moment. /// The bedbugs were, in fact, more than a year ago, but that is the real experience that comes to mind. It feels bizarre that it was so long ago, when the fear and the distress still feels so fresh. I don't want to feel like I'm recovering, still, from something that happened a year ago. I know that a year ago I was still living out of bags, so it's unfair or unnecessary to put the pressure on myself to be "over it," but it's still striking that it was so long ago!

My first-born graduated from High School, and is now mere days away from heading out of the nest and into college. He is ready. I have so many, many emotions and questions flooding me now and seem to be shifting by the moment. Did I prepare him as best I could? Did I coddle him too much so that he won’t be able to function well independently? Am I less of a “whole person” now that my baby boy is no longer at home and needing him mom? What kind of new experiences will he have, and friends will he make? Will he think fondly of his childhood and always want to come back, if only for visits? For the most part, I am teary at what seems like an incredible loss, but also feel guilty for that as this is a natural and happy part of life. I am sincerely grateful that we are financially situated such that he is able to go to college, and also relieved that he got into a good school that is going to be good for him as well. I am inspired to find new hobbies to occupy my time, and also treasure the time I have left before it is my baby girl’s turn to do the same, and my emotions run the gamut yet again.

Empty nest as of a month ago. I miss Lizzie hugely. But it's an inspiration as well. Time to reinvent, restore, revise...

Well, I had a heart attack after coming home from Aunt Judy’ funeral. I tell folks I’m a grateful member of the stunted hearts club, and I think I’m on my way to making the grateful part real. So, I’m inspired to change my life so I can save my life. Working out most days and trying to reorganize my life to place selfcare high up on the list.

In the past year, I have been promoted twice. The first time was Rosh Hashanah last year and the next time in May. I can't say I expected the second one but I did expect the first. I am incredibly grateful and proud and feeling accomplished. I have worked so hard since starting here and I feel very lucky to have that work recognized and count for something more than producing good work for clients.

I graduated college! It took a long time for it to sink in that everything around me is going to change now that I'm no longer a student. I honestly don't know how I feel. I feel grateful for the best college experience I could've asked for. I feel regretful that I didn't do more to take advantage of my time there. I feel resentful that it's over, but relieved that I can finally start being a real adult who doesn't go out four times a week. It's really a lot of emotions that I'm still trying to untangle and it changes on a daily basis, but overall I'm just really, really thankful for my four years.

We (my wife and I) had some very close friends get separated. It forced me to look at my marriage and realize how much I love it and my wife; I do not want anything to happen to it. I am a little scared but hopeful that we can make it.

Quitting my part time job. It was stressful & I was so relieved when it ended. I’ll look forward to enjoying my April next year.

Got married! A sense of comfort/confidence that wherever I venture I will have support.

This year's focus had a lot to do with my eldest daughter's journey to manage her anxiety and begin to feel more confident in herself. I had misunderstood her stomach pains and food avoidances as having to do with an eating disorder. When we finally understood that anxiety was the issue, my time focused on finding the right therapist, changes in diet, meditation, yoga and most recently switching to an all girls private high school and starting accupuncture. It took a lot of energy. It frustrated me to see her anxiety lead her to close herself off from people when she so clearly needed to know she was worthy of love. It brought up a lot of questions about my own boundaries and how I could help her help herself and let go of expectations and outcomes. I am still learning this.

I finished my MA dissertation and graduated from university despite having serious problems with concentration. I mostly feel relieved, although I'm also frustrated that I didn't do a better job.

Let's see - a few happened: 1. I started a contracting job - so far so good 2. Wife started working full time again - so far so good 3. Youngest went off to college - so far so good

I finally graduated from uni. I am relieved that I have finally finished a degree and hopeful that I will use it. First when I teach in Japan and then in conservation when I get back. The week of my graduation was also a really special time because my mum came to stay and I got to spend a lot of time with her.

This past year included 33 -- 33! --radiation treatments. Only after it was all over did I realize how angry I was to have been diagnosed with cancer. Almost like the stages of grief-denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. I think I am now somewhere between bargaining and acceptance. How did it affect me? Made me a bit resentful.

This year I started seeing a food therapist (and nutritionist, and bariatrician). I did not understand that many of my long-held ideas and beliefs about food, eating and health were disordered. It's a revelation to hear and ever more so to understand that there are people out there who don't think about what they eat. Meaning, they don't critically review every food choice assigning it a label of "good" or "bad" or "healthy", etc. I've been learning to listen to my body, to understand that it's ok to give it food when I am hungry. I have seen hunger as a flaw, a sign that I have done something wrong. I didn't know that I really am an emotional eater. What I THOUGHT of as emotional eating is kind of a caricature of what emotional eating is. I'm learning to hear the voice that talks about food all the time in my head. If I understand it's there I can start to learn how to change it. Make it more quiet. I have felt ashamed, embarrassed and very vulnerable as I learn these things about myself, about my relationships and in thinking about how and when to share parts with friends and family. I am embarrassed by my fatness. I still feel like I should be able to "fix" it. I have a lot of work to do, about my eating and feelings that may or may not mean losing weight. The idea of not losing weight as a result of all of this work is really disappointing.

This January, I was hospitalized for atrial flutter. After a cardioversion (shock), I was cleared and sent home. I was hospitalized again in March for the same thing, and had to get an ablation done. It's had me thinking a lot about the stress I carry and how I let it manifest. I'm grateful because it's urged me to make healthy changes in my life. I'm a little resentful that I have it at all, because I feel like I do pretty much everything I can to make myself healthier, and it still doesn't seem to be enough.

We had a failed attempt at IVF. I treated it very much like a process for the most part and it wasn't too difficult or stressful. Taking each step at a time and working my way through the appointments, scans, medications and operations. But when it failed, I felt lost. That was our only free NHS attempt. The next steps are expensive. And indeed as complicated logistically and medically as the first go was, but with no idea of whether or not it would work, or how many more attempts it would take. A baby feels a long long way away now - a family even more distant... It's had a profound effect on me. I feel like it defines me now, a barren woman, unable to have children. Someone who needs to pay attention to everything about my body - what I eat, how I exercise - because my 'normal' isn't working. The first thing my friends ask about - the thing my family talks about behind my back...worrying about me and John and our future.

I quit a job this year that I had previously planned on staying in for at least 3 years. I had only been there 1.5 years. But it was time to go. I wasn't being listened to. I was stressed out. I was severely underpaid for the work I was being expected to do. I asked for resources and was not given them. I was constantly talked over by men in meetings. It started to affect not only my mental health but my physical health as well. I am so relieved that I left because I feel so much healthier now. I am in a contract position that is much more focused and that is allowing me to develop myself in a more creative space. Also, I love the people at this job and the fact that there are many women in leadership positions at my new company doesn't hurt either!

My gut response was to say something negative about 45. But I'm going to make it more personal. My second Irish tour was so powerful and magical. I connected with family and music and friends and nature.

I started dating Arianna. I was called to call her into my life. It was just a whisper of a thought that I acted on, but as soon as I did I was pulled into an existential lucidity far beyond what I had expected. The levels we connected on were my highest levels and our conversations have never stopped elevating me. I found a sense of purpose within/with and outside of her. I was made aware of childhood trauma and then blew through it. I am grateful for all of it. I am confused as to the implications of what I'm learning as I keep finding structures through which to live better but also keep having them broken down in favor of living through joy. The contrast is confusing and sometimes causes me to question who I am or how I should even begin to answer that question. I like where I am though, even if I cannot really tell where that is.

This past year I had the opportunity to direct two plays that I wrote. During the time I was very stressed and for a time after I had negative connotations with it because of the stress and because I felt like I had gotten negative feedback from my teachers. Now I have started to realize that it was an amazing experience and something I can look back on with pride not regret.

The most significant experience in this past year happened in December. MY MAN PROPOSED!!!!! AHHHHH!!!!! I couldn't have dreamed up a better proposal and am so honored that the love of my life would ask me to share the rest of time here on earth with them. The proposal was no small feat—my boyfriend reached out to my siblings and together, they planned the perfect engagement scheme, complete with a food tour representing significant places in our traveling romance, a Christmas tree light show, and a compilation of sneaky photo captures that when strung together asked the big question, "Will you marry me?" I MEAN, COME ON! How awesome is that?! BEST PROPOSAL OF ALL TIME! They all pretended it was sister's graduation party so I had no idea until the very end of the night when my man led me to the massive Christmas tree in Faneiul Hall, knelt down on one knee, and proposed in front of a crowd of tourists. Right as he knelt down, Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas is You" began playing. It was the most magical experience ever! And in a flurry of tears, he told me to stop crying for a minute because he had invited my closest friends who were emerged from the crowd to give me a great big hug!

The first thing that comes to mind is something that happened just a week ago. I went up to one of my regular trails to hammock and get my mind off things that were troubling me. As I started to head down, I ran into some moose and was charged by one. The experience was very surreal and it made me really respect the absolute monstrosity that moose are. It made me quickly realize how unimportant those things on my mind were and that I truly did not want to die. I'm very humbled and grateful for that experience.

I managed to finally refi my house this year. It was stressful, exciting, and lots of work. But we managed it. And I was very relieved and thankful for less financial stress.

My husband's diagnosis, Stage IV, inoperable, pancan. His transition last Monday. We've been together over half a century. I feel grateful for family and so many years of a great life. I feel relieved that his pain has ended. I feel some resentment that work took time away from him other than care giving. Inspired because I work with mostly young persons and they will change the world for good. They have helped me.

I was laid off from my job. Despite the fact that I really hated the job, it definitely highlighted some of my feelings of unsuitability or inability to thrive in any given environment. Everything had been leading up to this, and while the outcome was not a surprise, it was done in a truly cruel way. I was blindsided, given no reason for the lay off (initially I thought I was fired and they didn't even bother to clarify this to me), and was basically escorted out of the building. Not only was this humiliating, but it has plunged me into more feelings of self doubt and lack of worthiness. The one good side is that I understand how bad of a fit this role truly was for, especially after hearing continuing complaints from my co-workers. Additionally, I realize how under valued and under paid I was. I can only hope that the next role will help me feel that I am worthy and appreciated in a way that this one certainly did not.

This year has been a very difficult year with our youngest - a lot of tantrums and physical violence. I have honestly been resentful of the amount of oxygen in the emotional room that it pulls away from the rest of the family and my relationship with my husband.

I participated in a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) class that changed my life! I am so grateful that this class was offered in our small town and that I was able to participate. The program and its benefits have created an extraordinary place of peace for me to go to, to participate in, to reach for or settle in to, when I need it. Simply amazing to experience such a life changing practice. Still at it, daily!

I think the most significant experience of this past year has not been a good one, though it seems that this question leads one to try and think of a good experience. I think the most significant experience of the past year has been becoming rootless. The combined experience of not finding a job, not really knowing what I want to do with my life, and not having a real home has totally hollowed me out. It left me feeling uncertain of myself, pretty deeply depressed, flattened out, hopeless, and empty. I am not sure what I want or how to get it. I don't feel even remotely capable. (Sometimes I wonder if I have been overconfident and maybe the marginal security of middling in capability employment and significance is all I can hope for)

I lost my first love in the last year. It has made me feel literally every emotion I can think of. I've felt alone, relieved, happy, stressed, cheated, confused, unsure. The list goes on and on its challenged me to be "better" but I don't really know what that means

I had knee replacement surgery in September of 2017. The first month I did almost nothing except PT and stay in bed, with very short times of walking around the house or being in the recliner. The recovery was hard. It was worth it, though. I am very grateful that I did it. After getting used to my new leg length, I realized that I have MUCH less back pain.

I suppose I'll start with getting sober, since that's a big one. I just read my 10Q answers from last year, where I admitted to feeling pretty conflicted and scared about my drinking, but also stating that I really, really, really didn't want to have to give it up. This was it though, the year when I finally faced the fact that I can't drink like a "normal" person, and decided it's too exhausting to try. I'm an alcoholic, full stop. Why continue to fight it? I've been going to AA and trying to figure out this sobriety thing. I'm meeting with a woman on Thursday who I hope will be my first sponsor. She has been super supportive by text and phone since we met at my first meeting, and she was a "home drinker" and a "drinks mom" just like me. All in all, I am incredibly grateful, relieved, and inspired. Being sober is very freeing, even at just 11 days in. I imagine all kinds of experiences I couldn't even dream of before, because I couldn't imagine being separated from alcohol even for a few days. I could train to run a marathon, I could go on a meditation retreat, I could hike the Appalachian Trail. Hopefully I can also do more prosaic things, like go to the doctor without having an anxiety attack, and kiss my children goodnight without worrying that I smell like a distillery, and put the 40% of my mental energy that used to go to planning, resisting, and wanting more booze to basically any other use. Sobriety is just the first step in getting to know myself, truly and deeply. I want to learn who I am, and to love that person. I want to see what I'm really capable of. If giving up alcohol is the trade-off, then that's a deal I'm willing to make.

Earlier this year, I became became better friends with some people. This was partly because girls stopped being scared about being friends with boys. I'm really glad for this change, mainly because it means I'm actually happier in day-to-day life. I have friends!

40th birthday Enjoyed spending time with family and friends but was also conflicted by some people not making an effort and also about being the center of attention.

I decided to retire on April 25. I am relieved that I have decided. I am scared mostly about money but also about the unknown.

This year I started IVF. It feels ironic but I don't regret any of the choices I made along the way.

I got hired at Grosse Ile through a chain of events that could only have been scripted. My ex co-teacher has her currentco-teacher retire. I have flight privileges that allow me to come home on a redeye from Portland and fly back to continue... I can't even imagine all the things that had to come into line.... I am grateful for the chance to find a stable home to teach. I am sad to leave the stage that I built in Rouge. I am relieved for a year without theater and the sleepless nights that goes with that. I am exhausted but I'm thrilled to be moving on in my career.

Visiting home for my uncle's funeral, seeing my cousin not feeling well, and being the only one who moved to get him some water/gatorade Seeing how his health is so bad. Seeing the downward spiral of health of my contemporaries and approaching death. Attending another funeral.

I found that I am still too young to retire. I also found out that I can’t physically do factory work at my age. And I did find a technical support position which I am very able to do. The pay is not what it use to be, but it is better than the alternatives. I am Greatful. I am also relieved.

I cant say 1 significant experience. Ive lost some weight with trying to stay off sweets. We lost my grandfather. My father and I were able to have some bonding time and finally built up the fireplace and the outcome was awesome.

I changed jobs - twice. The first switch was terrible in every way imaginable. Looking back at my 10Q from last year I wanted to make a switch, I knew that all my worse fears could come true and I both trusted myself to survive it and had made a financial plan to give myself a cushion if anything went wrong. While I am resentful that everything that could go wrong did - I did survive it and I am better off. I am working really hard to pay down debt and have no emergency savings and I am trying to trust that I will get there.

I left my marriage of 20 years. I am both grateful for those 20 years and relieved that I made the decision to leave. It affected me profoundly and the effects are just barely known, even to me.

My trip to Africa was incredibly inspiring. Meeting people living there who are involved in conservation was so hopeful. I became enamored of Botswana as a country and an idea - an entire country dedicated to conservation of native species! The history of its leaders influence renewed my faith. When I look at pictures of myself on safari, I have never, ever looked so happy! I think I could live there if I did not have to leave my family. The experience made me more confident in being able to communicate my conservation message at the zoo. I have begun to integrate my intense desire to be a part, however small, in the saving of wild places with my spiritual faith. I spoke at an interfaith church function about this as well as at Grace.

Finally finishing my master thesis and becoming a master of science. I am mostly relieved

I found family. I sent my DNA sample and found family on both sides of the family. Best of all, a secind cousin, found me and gave me pictures of my Dad, who died when I was 10, along with my Godparents. What a thrill. I was left speechless and in tears. I have since met my newly found cousin. I found family. I am so grateful for the pictures and to know someone who knew my Dad

In January I went on my Birthright trip with my sister and three of our friends. We also made lots of new friends on the trip. Seeing Israel has been one of the best experiences of my entire life. I loved connecting with my past and learning about so many other kinds of people.

Going back to school for a graduate degree is a significant experience that I endeavored on this year. I am proud of the work I have submitted in for my classes.

Daughter moving out. Felt empty - a loss, but happy for her, relieved because what she needed.

I moved out of my home into an apartment. It has been liberating and I've been able to meet new people and go on dates and better find myself. One thing I hope to do is create a better routine for myself, but it takes time, I know!

Every murder be a police officer of an unarmed citizen of color or mentally ill person affects me. Every time an Anglo person calls the police on people of color for no discernable reason other than "otherness" it affects me. Every act of anti Semitism affects me. Every act of hatred agains LGBT persons affect me. Every murder of black trans persons effect me. I am resentful, angry, and afraid. I am all of those things because I am Jewish, Black, Lesbian, and a mother. In spite of all of it, I try every day in some small way to repair the world and do acts of mitzvot. I hope to inspire change by being change. I know it's working. I know it is. I affect my universe and the people in it to do and be better.

I was disowned by my family. I'm almost relieved.

A new boss. I am feeling grateful; for the space to breath, for the not so small gift of a supervisor who is innately tuned to professional development, for the ability to go to sleep thinking about more than just "what can I do to find a new job?", for the opportunity to enjoy where I am for the moment.

A significant thing that I experienced was to finally decide to make a big renovation to our house. I never thought we could afford it and approached it as being very untenable. But as we did our research, we were able to make an educated decision about moving forward. I am extremely grateful to be in the position to make changes to my home so that my family can live more comfortably.

Jeez. I feel like the whole year has been about work. and im proud of some ways im handling things - especially the pivot we took to involve the staff - and i think im a decent boss. and yet - im super stressed. im working a ton. i feel unappreciated. im still not confident in my skill set. i dont know what else im qualified to do. am i having any impact on anything? what is the point? feels like "created work" instead of real work. i want to be more strategic and innovative but im not there. i should feel good about this big promotion and how my career is going but i just feel tired and empty. i was really proud of how i was doing last year - rocked regional planning, israel @70, all the work with the UES. like it was a really slam dunk year. but this is a whole new thing and it will take me time to feel solid about it. Dating - well reading last years answer is freaking depressing since i wasted half this year with kalman as well. but i do feel like i continue to learn about myself. oh yeah - we checked off a big bucket list item. i thought that would feel different too. i still feel so incompetent in that area and therefore lack confidence so it doesnt seem real. like - check, yes, did that, but i havent really conquered it. and i want to conquer it. i dont want it to be a thing anymore. hard to do that when youre always single... i really just want to get married. what else - started going to hadar. went on the retreat which was out of my comfort zone. go to shul there more. really trying, but alas my whole life has to be dictated by dating so im going to try going to Jewish center and chabad more because i need to be where single men are. broke up with my therapist. make up! jeez. why am i so sensitive about my appearance? and i feel like i am sooo desperate for a man to love me. like i love the attention. especially from "bad boys". sinai. kalman. but then these nice guys who like me, i feel nothing. why?? big fight(s) with tzip this year. shocker. were ok right now i think. i dont feel great about my UWS friendships. we need to be more there for each other. i want to be a more thoughtful friend. do a favor cuz why not. show up. help. hope it comes back to me. egg freezing - proud for making that happen. feel more committed to single mom by choice. i wont let myself become aunt sylvia. i wont let life circumstance dictate my life. dating stuff is so depressing. i need to learn to cope with it better. goal for the year - need a new therapist. travel - good year! i went to costa rica solo again, philly with deb, israel for work which was reallllly great and thought provoking and fun (also hard feeling like i dont fit in), may - LA Collaboratory (also hard but interesting and in the end met some good peeps, saw irene), July - nashville with Deb , august - AZORES and portugal with talya which was incredible. note - dont check work email while on vacation :)

In the past year we moved into our home. There’s been a whole lot of emotions coming with moving into a place well above our means everything was pretty hard but over the last six months we have really moved forward on our goals. The house has been a blessing and a curse in many ways and we are getting there on having it feel like a home. I’m grateful for it and resentful on it’s effects to other places in our lives. Hopefully this gets better

I think this year was pretty smooth sailing until July. Then our lives have started to unravel in a series of financial, health, and family crisis. I am feeling a lot of things, including the shame and anxiety involved with starting the bankruptcy process and the fear that I will lose my husband to cancer and my father to heart disease before the year is over

I recall heading to Ottawa with my wife and kids for a significant family event. I was feeling down and derailed at the time, and the experience of me being there made me feel like I needed to do more, and do better, with my daily life. Shortly after that, I moved into a new role at work that will help me do so. It's a small step forward, but it's set me on a trail that I hope to blaze in many ways this year.

This was a building year. Building a better relationship with my wife. Building a better home. Building my career. Building a more happy and sustainable relationship with my kids. I am grateful for it, but now the noise and distraction of it all is coming inexorably to a halt. Kids gone. Home remodeled. Condo sold. And now I have to face the stillness and the opportunity this presents.

I finally made it a priority to exercise and lose the baby weight. I'm feeling a lot better about myself and in control of that part of my life.

I traveled to Iceland and Italy (Italy was by myself)! It was incredible. I loved it and learned so much about both cultures and saw the most magnificent beauty. Ma Rabu Maasecha Hashem! I’m very grateful to have planned it and done it. I did get lonely though at times, which I don’t think is too abnormal for traveling alone.

Moving after 35 years in the same house - one that I built with my own 2 hands (and with my wife). My feelings are a mixed bag (the building was torn down, but...) - grateful: check; relieved: check; resentful: no... but nonetheless a bit sad, because 35 years of (literally) blood, sweat, tears, and love reduced to a pile of rubble feels like loss. Inspired: of course - there's a fresh beginning...

I proposed to my girlfriend, Fran, in the sea off the west coast of Wales and she said yes! I'd been thinking about it for a while, not least during 10Q last year, when I started the clock ticking by writing about it. I thought about how I wanted to do it. I decided that I wouldn't wait to ask our parents for their blessing first because I wanted Fran to be the first to know. But we had a number of lovely phone calls with our parents when we got back to the bungalow in the evening. It made everything special for a while. It still is, but we've got used to the idea. It has made us both happier than we were. I think we both knew we wanted it. I'm relieved she said yes, but I never really doubted she would. I'm inspired because I think our wedding next February will be special and will hopefully reflect the people that we were before we met, are together, and have become.

One significant experience that happened this year was when I reached the point of realizing that my way of life was not sustainable - my addictions (arguably) to sex, weed, drinking. I wasn't hedonistic, but I certainly had those tendencies and they weren't contributing to a healthy lifestyle, mentality, or attitude. I am grateful I had the experience of coming to realize this, and tackling it with grace: consciously ceasing physical connections with women for a time, seeking therapy, and diminishing my drug use.

I got a dog. After ten years of thinking about it, i brought home a 9 week old labradoodle puppy in October. It has completely changed my life. He drives me insane and trashes the house, but I adore him --I'm more grateful, peaceful and I laugh at least once a day since he came into my life.

It’s actually hard to pick one, for all that my day-to-day life is boring, I had an eventful year. Perhaps the best one to pick would be my first time at Or Ami. I had been seriously considering conversion for about....two, three months after a period of general curiosity spanning back before I even left xtianity when I sent emails to two of the synagogues in my area asking about attending a service as a prospective convert. The temple I go to now was the first to respond and. My rabbi’s queer. She said so in her second email. I. Knew that Reform Judaism was accepting of queer people, but this was. Something unprecedented for me. I had left the church for a large part because of the homophobia and transphobia I saw. It was scary, going to a new place entirely by myself and being wholly out of place (in my own mind), but I was quickly welcomed into the fold and the....the family that I’ve made there has been a wonderful presence in my life. I am eternally grateful that I swallowed my anxiety, first for the email and then for that first service I attended.

I was torn and broken emotionally with my husband. Divorce was brought up often, I felt betrayed, hated and unwanted all while going through our last pregnancy. Once Natanya was finally bored I channeled that energy into moivation to become a better me. I stopped playing victim and learned to appreciate who AMANDA truly is and who she wants to be. I am grateful for this experience and hope I continue to grow and become a better me.

At a former job, where I had been held in high regard & trusted with many responsibilities, when a new team of Mgr. & Office Mgr. Came in and took over my life changed in such a damaging way that nine years later I continue to struggle with unresolved feelings. In the past year I have begun healing. I'm not glad at all that it happened. I cherish hurt feelings toward those involved. I will stand up for myself sooner in the future, now that I realize my worth.

EMDR therapy with my psychologist was a significant experience. For so long, the traumas of the past have been too painful to face directly, I've spent years in therapy looking at them out of the corner of my eye. The idea of entering into a semi-trance and revisiting the most terrible experiences of my life sounded both horrifying and frankly kind of hokey. And yet I've done it, spurred onwards by my desire to heal and take responsibility for my life. I feel proud of myself and also profoundly grateful for my wonderful psychologist, who is so patient and skilled and has taught me so much. I think the therapy itself has helped, though the scientist in me has to acknowledge I can't tell how much is the EMDR and how much is the yoga practice I began this year, which introduced me to mindfulness and meditation. But I think it has. I feel like my brain is less frozen at trauma point, like I'm beginning to construct newer, healthier narratives about the past. I don't want to overstate it, it really is just beginning, and it is slow and hard work. But it's there. There is one thing I have to record here, because I will be interested to know what I think of it next year... when I had my second session this week, I was having trouble quieting my mind, and I totally wanted to dummy spit and give up on the experience. But I thought to myself, it's the Days of Awe, the high holy days, the time to 'clean up your stuff' as my Judaism lecturer would put it. And I kept going. And since I'm not a Jew, I'll be very interested to know what I think of that this time next year.

Just recently (same day as Rosh Hashanah) by step-mother died. I didn't call her my step-mother until after my father died; I never lived with her but it became awkward to keep calling her my father's wife when he was no longer alive. And in several respects step-mother is probably an accurate and truthful description. She always had a smile on her face, always saw the positive, always looked 'just so.' My takeaway is that she encouraged me to be my best self - always. She enjoyed her life, was always willing to try something new and was adventurous. Also, she was ageless and timeless to me. I'm sad and peaceful all at the same time. It was sudden but what she would have wanted.

Homelessness.Not the physical living on the streets. But, the feeling of having no figurative home. It finally happened. I don't belong anywhere. It's saddening yet enthralling. There is freedom in this displacement. A chance to build something instead of settling for something.

The house sold. It's gone. It lives in our memories--like Mom--but we can never, I can never go back. I haven't quite absorbed it yet. Just earlier today I had my first vivid memories of the place--it had yet to become a *memory* until today.

My trip to Europe with Seth was the highlight of my year. We went to Paris, London, West Midlands and Dublin. We met our British cousins and saw places our ancestors lived! We even saw the statue of my great great uncle who was a world famous Victorian spring jumper in Netherton. I was extremely grateful to have the opportunity to do this!

I finished my thesis. I forget that, sometimes: this year, I finished my thesis. I am grateful. I learned a lot from the experience. I know myself better, with regards to my work -- my strengths, my weaknesses. I know that my morning routine works wonders for me, so long as I actually do it. I know that I am too hard on myself. I know that I want to work, to make an impact on the world through my actions and my art. Enough time has passed now that it's hard for me to feel inspired by the work I have done, and I tend to cringe at my own work, even when it's good. That's something to work on for this new year, I suppose.

My oldest child, my daughter went off to college. It has made me proud, weepy, scared of the future and grateful for her expansive future. I love that she's happy, healthy and thriving after all she has endured.

My trip to Israel was very remarkable. I had a moment at the Wall when Tofi texted me that he missed Steve. Was super impactful for me and gave me a moment to grieve again.

I GOT A NEW JOB!!!! WITH BENEFITS!!! The past three years of my life have been challenging to say the least. My personal finances have been like a real-life Jenga game, only moments away from toppling. The amount of stress I've been under is unimaginable. I can only think that this new position (with a full-time salary) will give me the breathing room I need.

losing my temp position with the job, not being able to find a job that i was qualified for - left me anxious and depressed. the job was so stressful and i felt like i was constantly under attack. maybe i was being pruned in that place. i was happy that i didn't have to remain there, sad bc i lost touch with some of my clients that i had a special relationship with, unsure of what was coming next, and angry that i was let go based on lies. it felt unfair. little did i know that God was realigning me - just as i prayed. he was shifting me into something new, and maybe i wouldn't have taken the new path had i still been there.

I found a home in Big Sur, moved into it, and have begun to set roots here. Being in my own home for the first time ever such a beautiful experience. I had no idea how much living alone would feed me, ground me, empower me. I have learned that I need to be alone almost as often as I am with people. I have learned that I self-reliance is a gift. I am grateful.

I broke a bone this year, the first ever in my life. It affected me interestingly -- I was confronted with pain and necessary lifestyle changes, and when I resisted, it was sufferable, and when I practiced acceptance, it was totally fine and not a problem. There were times that I adapted well and saw the injury as a gift to practice presence through, and moments where I resented the injury and felt that it set me back to bad habits of poor lifestyle choices. Looking back, I feel grateful that I went through it because now I can relate a little more to people who have been or are injured in some way. I also got a renewed sense of gratitude for things I take for granted, like my able-body. I also got to experience the healing power of my own body in a way that I hadn't before. That was very inspiring. Sometimes I forget all this, and fall asleep again, but it feels truly wonderful and inspiring in the moments when I wake up.

The birth of my son was significant and enjoyable--it truly filled me with joy and love for both him, my daughter, and my husband. I am grateful that the labor went smoothly and is over.

Finding out that my tenant/friend was a heroin addict and having him leave my home was devastating. It impacted me greatly and still does and the fact that he has been in and out of detox several times and went to a sober house and still hasn’t managed to stay clean is very painful for me to see. As hard as it’s been to witness, it has also inspired me to continue to use my own recovery to help others that are still suffering from alcohol and drug addiction.

My husband and I are back together. I never thought it would happen. I am grateful for the insight from a woman (Denise Darlene) whose book (Real Passion Revolution) we both worked through together to understand the “why” behind all the emotions and actions that drove us apart and what to think/do/say differently to make it work (the 10 secret ingredients for healed, healthy relationships). I am grateful. I am thankful that he never gave up, even though I had. We continue to work on our relationship. I am hopeful again and enjoy the time we spend together and look forward to the future. It is possible to heal!

building the yurt! relieved, proud, surprised, touched -- noticed a lot of patterns in my family that, though I tried to work upstream against them, came through loud and clear. And, in the end, I saw so much love.

Mother almost died. She was in hospital for 3 weeks and I was there for much of it. She really almost did die, there was one day that I spent a few hours saying goodbye. She couldn't talk at all. I'm astonished that she is so much herself again.

Coordinating the church labyrinth project has taught me Want No Credit. God does all the work. All I have to do is show up. Owning one’s Doer-ship reduces efficiency hence reduces the chances of human evolution. Letting go of wanting credit allows for the highest possible purpose for mankind to come forward.

Diagnosed with ADHD. I am relieved and frustrated and upset at the same time.

I was flown to Auburn for a job interview. I made it past the phone screening, invited to come to the face-to-face, all-day rounds of interviews, had to prepare a presentation on my “vision” for the College of Science and Mathematics as new Communications Director. I got to stick around and watch SEC baseball as Auburn took on Vandy at home. Sigh. I saw Jordan Hare stadium. Sigh. I flew in and out of Atlanta, got to walk around Centennial Park that Saturday before flying back home. Sigh. I did not get the job. Super sigh. That was months ago, back in early May. Things have gone from bad to worse in my current role at UALR. Every day since then I’ve wondered if I could’ve done just a bit better on that interview if it couldn’t have been me at Auburn instead of the person who is there now. Sigh. I’m wistful. I’m a little afraid. Other opportunities have come and gone and for various reasons haven’t panned out. What’s my fate to be?

I am inspired by knowing my purpose in life. I need to keep remembering it and reminding myself of it. It is a relief to know what I am meant to be doing, because now I can say 'no' with less guilt, to any demands that are not congruent with my purpose.

This year, I decided to apply for a promotion in my current department. At that time, I felt like I was the best candidate for the job. I know the transactions and I understand the business processes. However, I was not chosen because I lacked "leadership skills". It was extremely hard to accept that at that time. I felt like I was ready but apparently per my management team, I was not. I felt resentful at first. But then after looking at it more objectively, I was relieved that I was not tasked to lead that team. The team's morale overall was at an all-time low due to unrealistic expectations that were set by management. The turn over rate was so high I doubt you can make those numbers look good on paper. If I was given that role, I do not think that I will be able to lead the team the way I want to lead them. I will be at the mercy of my management team and just act as a puppet for them. The team would have resented me. This incident made me realize that it was time to go. This inspired me to be better.

I had to have several eye surgeries again this year, and while it's certainly not the end of the world. I'm resentful that this issue has been lingering for so long, and it's still not resolved. It's making it too easy to fall into bad habits (staying home alone & eating too much) and to sometimes wallow in self-pity. When I can shake myself out of it. I am grateful that it is only an issue with one eye and should I still lose the sight in it, I still have another that works. : )

I became a grandmother. My daughter is an amazing mother and adores her gorgeous, healthy little boy. Her husband (now ex) is beyond-- well, just beyond. My daughter has moved in with me. We are adjusting day-by-day. This has been an awful and yet, joyous year. We love our sweet baby. My best friend, Kim, died. Diagnosed and then gone. She passed before I could see her and say goodbye. I've had no time to grieve her. We were supposed to be old ladies together. She inspired me. She made me laugh. A lot. She was a precious gift and I loved her very much. This is a hole that will never heal. She was my tribe and I feel lost without her.

Re-reading last year’s account of resentment and toxic friendships only asserts more fully how wonderful the last twelve months have been. I didn’t want all my answers to be about Matt (because there have been so many wonderful things before and after meeting him in January), but if we’re talking about significant experiences, he’s it. The last months of 2017 were neutral and really focused on making myself whole, without any pressure or goal in mind of meeting somebody in a romantic sense. It was always in the back of my head as more of an end goal, but I just wanted to be okay by myself as I realized that I was my own lifetime partner. And then I made some New Years resolutions to make 2018 about love, and I met Matt 7 days later. Since January, my days have been full of such love and gratitude for the world and all that it offers. The phrase “life-changing” makes sense now. He turned my world upside down and broke away (most of) the ego that I had built up to protect myself for so long. There’s still a way to go, but I continue to wake up each day feeling thankful for his presence in my life. I feel it in a different way then I did in those first few months, but it still feels like all the negative things in the past have been worth it to get to now – full of happiness, love, light, and gratitude. I love what Tantra in Love instilled in me: You are a reflection of those closest to you. I’m beginning to see how wonderful I am in the reflection of his beauty, inside and out.

I had a health scare in August. Initially it crippled me, but I was lucky enough to be surrounded by friends who distracted me long enough until the repeat examinations. I was faced with a doctor with zero empathy and a looming panic attack that had been boiling for a month, but luckily my results were clear and I felt relieved, almost as if I got my life back. I'm grateful to have so many people who care for me in my life. I also learned to trust my gut instinct and go to the doctor of my choice next time.

My mom's disease was diagnosed and I could see a big change in her ability and look when I visited Israel in March-April 2018. As it's a terminal illness, the next few years are quite predictable and will impact my emotional well-being and also force me to visit Israel more often.

I finished my first year of vet school and broke up with my boyfriend. It was a big change but it was time and I am sure that it's the right thing to do. Right now I'm doing that really cliched post-breakup thing where I'm trying to figure out "me" and who I am and what I want. I just started my second day of year 3 in vet school and I am feeling strange, excited, nervous, a little bit empty, and hopeful. I hope to learn more about my wants and needs over the next year.

I got married, officially, finally. With a ceremony I wrote myself, in a beautiful huge old house that I could get lost in, on the edge of a cliff at sunset, with loads of people who loved me as witnesses, to the most amazing person I've ever met. It changed more things than I expected, and it's still changing. Some days marriage is hard, but it's rarely bad. Most often it's easy and fun and joyful. I like being his teammate; I like that he's mine.

As shitty as the election turned out, it has really made me recognize what my values truly are and what I’m willing to stand up for. It’s also made me evaluate who I spend time with, and how to speak up when things aren’t right.

Aksel doğdu :)) Epey ilginç bir deneyim, yani ben ki çok fazla bebek/çocuk sevmeyen biri olarak içimden epey bir sevmek geliyor. Aile olmak, büyümek vs konularında epey inspiring

The most significant experience that happened this year would have to be the hurricanes. At this time last year, the kids and i were separated from Eric and attending services in WB and DC. The hardest part was not feeling like i had the ability to make good decisions for our family and i hated being separated. There was also a lot of anger and guilt because so many people were stuck on the island and we were able to leave. I still don't understand why there wasn't a organized initiative to evacuate people. When people tel their "Maria story" i always feel that twinge of privilege from being one of the lucky few to get out the day before the storm.

Very recently I had an interview at IMC Trading and I was rejected. It was so disheartening to go through because I really thought that I had good connections there. I feel a ton of stress for the upcoming year and what my job will be when it is all said and done. The only thing that gives me relieve is that I know in 1 year I will read my 10Q answers and look back and realize how silly I have been.

A few months ago, I was having continual heart palpitations and extreme dehydration. I mean, I couldn't drink enough water even though I was pounding it down. I couldn't wait to take a sip while I was pouring myself a glass of water so I had to stop and drink and then continue. I went to the doctor and she referred me to a cardiologist. I ended up getting an EKG, a heart monitor for 3 weeks, and also an echocardiogram. All my results came back as normal. I have a normal, very healthy heart! Yay! (both of my parents have serious heart issues, and I have high blood pressure, so I needed to check this out) Prior to this time, I had been changing my diet where I was eating as few carbs as possible and also exercising like crazy. So I backed off on that, and felt a lot better just by eating more carbs and slowing down! I felt normal again. My palpitations subsided and I stopped being so ravenously thirsty. I learned that each one of us has individual dietary needs and getting enough electrolytes is super important. Pay attention to what your body is telling you. The biggest take-away from this for me is that I don't have anything wrong with my heart. I want to keep on being as healthy as possible. I vow to listen closer to what my body is telling me, too.

Many things happened this year but I'll focus on Leighton's anaphylactic reaction last Halloween. It terrified me. It was a slap in the face that even when you think you are doing everything right, everything can go wrong. I was also angry and resentful and filled with guilt. It's not fair. Of course its not. But I've had almost a year to reflect on this. Over the past year I keep coming back to the fact that everyone has something hard in life and this is our thing. Some people have many many hard things. We are privileged that we have the resources to manage through this and buy expensive allergy-friendly food and get her the best care. That experience broke down some of the fear of the unknown - we used the epi-pen for the first time, called 911 for the first time, dealt with paramedics for the first. We learned a ton. I think it helped us break through the fear and uncertainty of other things like trying the food challenges, getting her first 504 plan and getting ready for kindergarten. We have come so far this year in our confidence and ability to navigate through this and in our knowledge of food allergies. And yet. I still have so much to learn. I am still raw and scared. I can be easily triggered. I am still defensive and expecting strangers to meet me with doubt or little compassion. It gets better day by day but there is still a long road ahead.

There were several things two stick out to me. First at work I've come out as a gay man. To my boss, and some co workers. It was a releif to let people know me. I also came out online on FB which outed me further. I am grateful that people where kind and didn't say mean things. The second is moving and purchasing a new house with Teo. This was exciting, nerve racking and ultimately great. We both love the house.

My experience of being in a body that doesn't work the way it's supposed to has been exhausting and painful. I've realized I've been in mourning; grieving for what I no longer have and, worse, no longer can hope for. I'm emerging now, with some insight and working on what I *can* have and *can* hope for.

My eldest son is now a senior in high school, while my brother-in-law and his wife just had their first child. It really puts into sharp focus just how much time has passed and makes me reflect on the life I've lived since I first became a mother. I have no regrets, and even as I look to return to the working world (to afford college tuition), I'm happy to have been able to work part-time thus far and enjoy my kids as much as I have.

I got fired from a terrible job at the start of last year. I am relieved and grateful and also still angry and resentful and triggered. I can see how it was important to experience that job and probably that’s the final nail in the coffin of me doing really wasteful pointless jobs. But I’m still mad about how I was treated. I don’t know how to forgive that experience. The people didn’t apologize, I don’t need to forgive them. I need to forgive me and the situation. I don’t know how.

Being diagnosed with serious food allergies that greatly limit my diet & cause much discomfort. I'm resentful & upset with myself for causing it by accidentally eating a food I'm allergic to & not being more careful.

I finally made Aliyah! I'm excited and terrified. I feel like I turned my life upside down. I'm so used to being on top of everything, that this is very unnerving. But I know that in the end, it will be okay.

I watched my daughter receive the award for Valedictorian of her class. I've always felt she was a smart kid, and it was kept as a complete surprise until they announced her to the stage at commencement. It was so amazing to see her accept the honor, with her casual mix of shyness and "yeah, I got this". This honor, this acknowledgement, at this turning point in her life, framed the transition from the little girl I've been raising to this capable young woman, and I'm so, so proud of her, to tears ... and at the same time I'm reminded, bittersweetly, how quickly time passes.

My little brother was recently accepted into a group home for developmentally disabled adults. I'm so relieved, because he had been living with our older brother and it was not going well. He is completely incapable of living with me or our mother (he gets violent), so the only other option would have been to put him out on the street. So this is an amazing, incredible thing that's happened, and I know my mom and older brother have mixed feelings, but I don't.

I became a Jew in 5777, and then in 5778 I became an adult Bar Mitzvah. I am grateful for the opportunity to study with a group of friends and peers who were learning Hebrew along with me. I was also very nervous about reading from the Torah during the service and while I felt blessings for having the moment, I was also relieved to have it over! I have a much deeper appreciation for what my son accomplished earlier in 5778 (his Bar Mitzvah was 17 Tishrei), and also further respect for what my daughter will go through as she begins preparations for her Bat Mitvah this year.

My daughter graduated college, my son is still at home. My husband is in poor health. I am at my prime and am, frankly, resentful. And by turns, guilty. Our last greyhound, June, died after Thanksgiving and I am still mourning her. We adopted a half greyhound, half shar-pei, Farrah, who is helping to heal our hearts. Hillary is not president, and though the libtards fight it, President Trump is (hopefully) in the process of uncovering their crimes and will mete out appropriate punishment for all involved.

Met my idol Hayley Mills. The improbable became the possible. Having first thought about meeting her 5 decades ago and finally having the chance was beyond thrilling. I couldn't have imagined how gracious she was and how funny. Looking for a spot with good lighting for a photo--classic. I remember hugging her just because, well, it was Hayley Mills! I was awed, grateful. I felt so lucky, too.

This past year I spent the summer traveling to Israel, Spain, and London. It was an incredible experience. I was immersed in beautiful experiences that reminded me that I am one small piece of the moving world around me. I was given an opportunity to step away from my day to day responsibilities and the chance to breathe and gain greater perspective on my life and the path I am on.

I feel like there were so many experiences this year that are significant. I moved to FL for a job I love and had to rebuild a life here while trying to stay connected to my life at home. I received an H1B visa that will allow me to focus on my professional development for the next year. I started fostering animals which has been an amazing experience and helps me feel connected to a greater cause. Most recently, Artie moved to FL and we now live together. These have all affected me in different ways. I feel as though they have all helped me move closer to living an authentic life. Artie moving here has been very impactful. Learning how to live with another person, balance their needs and my own. Being supportive and present when there are so many things happening. I feel SO SO grateful for all of these experiences. I am inspired and motivated by my work and volunteering. I am grateful and relieved I do not have to stress as much about immigration for the next few years.

I went to Paris with my sisters! It was great because we talked about our dreams for the future and made plans to travel together again and spent time bonding. It also uncovered a lot of unresolved issues in our relationships that might have a chance to heal now. Excited to see what changes in the next year.

Deciding to make the effort necessary to get the loan in order to move into a bigger house, with all the adulting involved and the strees of having this loan, as much as leaving our first "together" house where we lived for ten years was pretty big. It made feel adult-ish, I worried and also felt excitment about this next step.

The passing of my Grandmother. Her passing opened up parts of my heart, mind, and soul which has led to a deeper search into my Jewish roots and how to combine these, as a non-practicing Jew with Jewish heritage. Her passing was a release from her unrealistic expectations and the guilt I felt from this.

Having my first panic attack was a catalytic experience. Having my brother move back in was also a very moving experience. Falling in love again. All of those experiences were a shock which made it hard for me to adapt. I learned a lot about myself, there was growth in the challenging moments and at the end of the tunnel, there was light.

I was officially denied participation with UofT varsity field hockey. It has been hard emotionally to accept the idea that my competitive playing career is over, but I kinda knew this was going to happen and was prepared. I always knew this was a possibility in being open about my mental illnesses and was prepared for that so that I could take on the role of mental health advocate. It has definitely inspired me to do the work that I knew was needed, but even more so now. I’m grateful for the opportunity to experience other things in life, like seeing friends, I got to go to Sheena’s Camp this weekend because I wasn’t playing, and I have time to do advocacy projects while still being able to stay on top of my schoolwork. Maybe I’ll get another chance to play competitive field hockey, maybe not, but the sport gave me the opportunity to study at UofT and get a degree from the #1 university in Canada.

It is a little over a year since I lost my mom. I still have a hard time reconciling with the huge loss of both parents within such a short span of time. At the same time, there is a tremendous sense of relief in that I no longer have to worry about them. Especially my mother who had no quality-of-life and the Last years of her life.

I ended a 6 and half year relationship. A legally binding domestic partnership. I left someone I love and care for because I was not receiving love and care in return. As much as I miss some parts of the relationship, I know I am better off now. She was not actually capable of loving anyone because she does not love herself. I cannot do that for her and I cannot get what I need from someone incapable of love. It turned my world upside down. It made me rethink my life and who I am. And I came to the conclusion that I am exactly who I have always been. Without that relationship, I am free to be my authentic self again. So no matter how much pain I went through and how much I will still feel from time to time, it was absolutely worth it.

I changed jobs, again. But the position I had was for a guy I thought was trying to brainwash the clients into believing everything he said as a health instructor personal trainer, and having the ladies blindingly follow his instructions, he was creepy. I had a lot questions. He made me uncomfortable.

Our baby entered our life appx 1 year ago. That was the most significant experience in my life. It was a hard and rewarding year for us. We are loving the little girl she is becoming. We are also struggling with what the best care for her is, and in general struggling with how to best provide for her. I am grateful for her and our family, and some what stressed for the future. Living in CA has been great but extremely hard with the rent/housing costs. Adding a nanny on top of that more than doubles our rent. We try to be responsible and save money for the future, but living here costs us all of my income.

What is standing out to me currently is spending time with Tommi in the woods, in her mourning of TJ. That last night it was pouring. We steped outside in bare-feet and stood in the middle of this forest and she just let it go. There was so much emotion. It was so beautiful and heart breaking to witness this mother coming to terms with never touching her beloved son's face again. A pain I don't even have available to imagine. It is so humbling and also so illuminating of what this life will at some point ask of me. I didn't know how to fix her and I didn't try because that wasn't my role. My role was to be her witness.

Michelle died of the tumor. Pam had a relapse and died. That made me really sad. Leading the team through this has been challenging but we've done some good stuff. Yesterday we had a blood drive in Michelle's honor.

While hiking a mountain trail with the whole family in Colorado this summer, we came to a lake with over twenty elk. The lake was so beautiful, and I felt thrilled and extremely lucky to be able to enjoy this sight, and to be able to share such an incredible experience with everyone.

This year, Mom died. It was a horrific experience. It was awful. I had to watch her mouth to see when she was done breathing. She was technically alive but she was gone. I miss her more than I can express. The one lesson that has come out of it for me is the power and truth of the statement ‏ה׳ ימלוך לעולם ועד. I am not in charge. I give it to G-d. And that is inspirational.

I was clinically depressed in Kuala Lumpur. It was hard and taught me 1. That it can happen to anyone. 2. Not to mess up my internal rhythms and cycles. I also went on Remote Year! And met Matt!

A significant experience in the last year.... has been Oliver being officially diagnosed with Autism, last fall was only the school district (fall 2017) and this summer (2018) was medical. It will have a profound effect on the services and resources available to him and to us as his family. I am grateful and also sad. I am sad for the opportunities he will and won't have. I am sad about all the "things" that bother him. I am happy because it is who he is :)

I joined WW and with my trusty companion Marge kept to the program between Feb-Sept and am still going, 29 pounds lighter. Very happy that I have been able to change a bad behavior (overeating)

Graduating from college did not feel like a significant event so much as the overwrought but somewhat abrupt conclusion of a daily routine, a lifestyle, that I had grown to love. I was struck by how wonderful my friends are, and cried conspicuously as we moved out of our shared room. I knew that our friendships would not end, but they would shift, and we would not share the same closeness, the same banter, the same togetherness, again. Simultaneously, I felt extremely grateful to my parents for all the opportunities and support they've given me. Our relationship has improved dramatically in the past year, though I don't know whether they realize that, or whether it's just me growing up. During those drawn out weeks, I was immediately and prematurely nostalgic for college, and could foresee the ache of losing that "opposite of loneliness" it provided. I was deeply moved by the words of Reverend Walton, who encouraged us, during our Baccalaureate ceremony, to be "quick to compliment, and slow to criticize... and if you do criticize, do so constructively." He added that "loving your neighbor is a precondition to loving yourself," which Leni and I especially found unexpectedly profound. I was relieved, too, to have accrued the honors I did, as they felt necessary to face my family and my high-achieving friends. They were a small validation that I had not completely wasted my expensive, prestigious education, even though it feels that way sometimes. Indeed, I was disappointed in myself, for not doing more, learning more, meeting more inspiring professors and classmates. I know that I sometimes prioritized the personal over the professional, which always felt right in the moment but has left me somewhat adrift since. I vacillate between thinking I've learned so much and feeling I did so little that was worthwhile. I suppose both can be true.

One significant experience that I've had this year is joining the Board of Little Wonders. It's the first thing I've done since the kids were born that feels like an adult task, where the focus is not on their direct care. Since I hadn't worked for a while before Alan was born, this experience has reawakened in me a need to do something that engages my interests and talents and that is just for me. For a while, I didn't know if I ever wanted to go back to work, or even if I could, but this move has really has inspired me!

This year, my mom and I traveled to Italy for almost two weeks. It was amazing and it inspired us both to travel more. I'm grateful we got to have this experience together.

Dad got cancer. Over the course of about 8 months we dealt with: unknown, diagnosis, treatment, and all clear. It was fast and traumatic and scary. While we bounced from one result to another I felt fear and oddly optimistic. It's clear and I feel good now but there's no denying their fragility anymore and that's scary.

I left my job to join a very early stage startup. I’ve build up a small but talented team and am grateful for the opportunity to lead but also struggling with the company culture. It’s a very volatile environment and can be demotivating at times. I hope it evens out in the new year.

Pa was taken to hospital and diagnosed with Alzheimers this past year. The photos of him being put in the ambulance were shared by Joey. It all looked so matter of fact as I suppose it in for my cousins. Since the diagnosis he has been in steady decline. When I do call my mother insists on showing me how skinny he has become. Sometimes he can hold a conversation with me but most of the time he's just checked out. When i first got the news I felt so sad and sorry for him. This is pretty much exactly the scenario that he wanted to avoid going through. He's wanting to die with some dignity. He is nearly blind. My mother is faithfully staying by his side as she has all these years. I try to imagine what he must be going through but I find it hard. Is he just going to slowly lose his mind? When will he forget who I am? My feelings about it now are mixed. On the one hand i want to fly there immediately and see him "one more time" while he can still remember me. On the other hand I think it would be more of a help to my mother if i go there after he dies. She'll be devastated I think. Other thoughts about this have been about me getting a sort of wake-up call to get my house in order. Primarily my finances. There needs to be something put away for when I reach the age he is now.

Amir and I went to the Love Burn on an island south of Miami in January. It had a magical way of reconnecting us and wiping the slate clean, erasing all past resentments and reminding us what it feels like to be in love.

When we tried to renegotiate our mortgage, the company we were working with set us up for failure, but finally, we were successful in our crossclaim. I am relieved even though we are still fighting with another creditor who tried to take advantage of our problem.

Leaving Microsoft after 20 years was definitely a significant transition. I went through many emotions- first stressed and emotionally drained , then resentful, then relaxed and energized and finally relieved. In relatively short order I can now reflect on all the amazing experiences and opportunities I had there, the friends i made and how i was compensated. It led me to reconnecting with a former manager who I loved working with and have teamed up with her again, however this time in an environment that aligns with my passion and allows me to create impact in a smaller much healthier environment. I appreciate the ability I had to build skills and network in the past, the mission of the CEO and the unbelievable scale and smart colleagues I worked with each day.

You had to move out of your apartment. The freedom was yours! But you couldn't do it. And it's okay! It doesn't make you a bad adult. Sometimes things are hard for you.

I'm writing my thesis right now. I'm in the last four weeks of 2+ years of grad school, sacrificing time with family and sometimes exercise for my studies. I've been both resentful but also satisfied that I've been moving forward and grateful to be learning so many new things. Now I'm excited to be finishing.

The only thing that really happened this year is that my husband's father died and his brother and cousin decided to move out to Oregon to mooch off of us. It took us 9 months before we were rid of them both. We are barely scraping by after this and am mentally exhausted from the non stop drama.

I remember the day that I got my acceptance email for the PhD program... I ran around my apartment with my laptop, yelling to my roommates. I jumped up onto the futon and called my mom, my sister, my best friend. I don't think I quit pacing across the couch for a half hour. It came completely out of the blue at 8:30pm on a Thursday night. My email was open because I had just emailed a new therapist to set up a meeting because I was feeling so much anxiety. And then this email came and a wave of relief washed over me. I walked around for days before the news really sunk in: a whole group of people just told me that I'm good enough to do this, and they want me to study with them. I'm beginning the career that will shape the rest of my life.

This past year has been nothing short of amazing. Marrying Michael and moving into our home were both of course incredible parts of my year, but having Abigail was definitely the most life-changing. I feel beyond blessed to have been able to conceive so quickly and have an overall pretty easy pregnancy and birth (other than a slight hiccup with her being breech). I am beyond grateful. I honestly don't feel like all the good that has come to me in the past year - I am beyond lucky. Abigail is such a joy; being a mom has given me a new purpose in life. I love our family.

I got married to the man I love. It has made me so very happy...

I am now #3 in my branch at work. I feel like after 11 years of long hours and many sacrifices, I am finally starting to see positive results. I hesitate to say 'enjoy' positive results, because I am not where I want to be yet, I still have more work to do and I have not yet taken on a partner at work, which would allow me to feel comfortable taking more time off. But I am proud of what I have achieved so far.

A significant experience was having met Daniel Radcliffe. Although it was more than a year ago, it certainly changed who I was. Traveling to England and living there, also impacted me. Those things that I dreamed about endlessly when I was yet to make decisions for my destiny and now real, not dreams anymore but truthful memories! Traveling altogether meant that I knew the power of my desires and compromise with them, understanding for real and beyond cliches that whatever I put my mind and hart into is conceivable and possible. Meeting Daniel Radcliffe and getting to see J.K.Rowling at an Avant Premier seemed so incredibly unrealistic and sad. People used to look at me sadly whenever I told them, at my 12 years of age, that I wanted to see them in real life, to meet them. They thought I was being unrealistic... and here I was, at 26 making those infantile dreams come true. When I came back to Chile, everyone in my family, close ones and relatives, friends I've made during the years, everyone was telling me of how impressed and proud they were, and how I became topic of conversation once they knew. I know probably Daniel won't remember a bit of that short conversation back in the West End after another of his performance, but oh boy, I don't think I'll ever be able to erase that moment from my mind. It was so real. All my imaginated conversations were perfect, in them I was sound and eloquent. And for Merlin's beard, how far from that this interaction went. Because it was real. It was the 12 year old me speaking through my 26 year old me. Unbelievable. Yes, unbelievable still. And of course, I cannot be more thankful and blessed for having done that. Yet it impacted me in a way I did not expect before. Even hours or minutes before actually meeting my heroes. The truth is that I feel unstoppable, in my simple regular life as an English teacher in Chile and a mother of one. There are millions of limitations and reasons for things not to happen, and yet I made them happen already once. What can stop me know?

I made the decision to leave higher ed after 16 years. It was a frightening decision, but I knew that it was time. I have been so grateful to have started a new chapter in a new place thinking about all new things.

My father in law died. It made rerhink again the importance of having family around for my children, how important my granmothers were to me when I grew up and to what I am, something that my kids will never have unless my mother in law moves to uk that will be tricky and cause difficult times but will be one of the best things ever that could happen to my kids. I am resentful for the poor relationship that I had my my granfather because I feel it did affect and spoil the time we (especially the kids and my husband) spent with him that cannot be recuperated now that he is gone. I am inspired to be a better person with my in law and try and give as many opportunities to my children to spend with their Granparents. Trips may be tireing and/or expensive but there is no value to time spent with your family.

My relationship of over 6 years ended as my girlfriend and I decided it was time to part ways. It was an amicable decision after many discussions of realizing that we had different needs or wants moving forward. Prior to our breakup, we downsized significantly and moved from our home of 4 years to a small apartment. The transition time was perfect in making sure that her son (as I use to refer to as our son) was enrolled and settled into high school. He is now a sophomore and by this time next year he will be driving with only 2 more years of school to go. Perhaps even more significant to the break up was the after breakup. I moved out and stayed with a friend who was going through a divorce after 15 years of marriage. She had decided to rent a large home and created a type of communal living situation with 3 other adults and 3 children (two of which are hers). Oh lord, what a trip it has been. Way beyond anything I could have imagined and still. Around my 40th Birthday when the veil was lifted, I have not been the same. Since the moment I fell in love with myself at that house, everything has changed. I started to see everything as it is in pure consciousness and the moment I saw my dear friend for the first time in this light, my love expanded beyond anything I had known. We were more shocked than others around us that our relationship made it beyond the friend zone. I am all around grateful for everything, even I continue to make my way through the grief of the break-up.

+ Finding out I have a special needs child. People are sad when they find that out. I am finding it to be a huge positive learning experience. Intellect and abilities are not the substance that necessarily produce good and kind human beings. I am thankful to have her in my life, she has given me so much joy

I took two trips out of the country, to Spain & to Norway. First off, I don't get jet lag, for which I'm grateful! And I have relaxed about travel, now that I can afford a hitch in plans (for example, our ferry was canceled due to inclement weather, & we quickly hopped on a plane). Not just that -- I no longer put pressure on myself to see/do everything; it doesn't feel like a wasted trip if I miss a sight or 2. That made it more fun & relaxing. Also! (how could I forget this?) I became a German citizen, thanks to their program of "restoring" citizenship to "victims of Nazi persecution & their descendants." I am still trying to figure out what that means. I don't feel less American or more German. I do think my (late) father would be pleased--I regret that we never talked about any of this....

Dealing with my elderly aunt and medical / housing for elderly has been really eye opening. I always knew we had an abundance of elderly personal care and nursing care facilities in this area, but I never realized how expensive they are. I am amazed at how many people can afford this places and they seem astronomical to me and way out of my Aunts price range even with help from the family.

One of, if not the most significant experience that happened over the past year was managing my diagnosis of ulcerative colitis. When I first got sick, I thought I had a pretty good handle on how to keep myself healthy, but it turns out I had a misdiagnosis, ended up in the hospital twice, and had to play with three different medications until I (hopefully) found what works for my body. It's definitely left me frustrated at times, but I also believe everything happens for a reason so I must've been given this disease to advocate for invisible illnesses, relearn what my body likes, experiment with different recipes and so on.

I went to this year's Pride parade and festival as an out transman. Last year I was questioning who I was and trying to step into being comfortable with myself; this year I feel as though I had completed that. I am still beginning on this journey, but I am fully on the path - I know who I am and for the first time in my life don't feel like I have to work at HOW to be myself all the time, but rather can simply work on being myself.

My wife's grandmother passed away at 103. Until her last few days she was never in a hospital or had had a procedure. Her death gave us an opportunity to reflect on everything that is important in life. Family, values and what really matters in life.

I often need a wide public banner that says "never forget" in order to jog my memory about significant experiences. Sure, I remember 9/11, but if you asked me to pick a significant event back in 2001, I'd probably have talked about how we hadn't fulfilled the cinematic vision of Arthur C Clarke and Stanley Kubrick. My brain is always liquidating the relevant and propelling toward escapist fantasy, or maybe it's choosing beauty and art over destruction and hatred, or perhaps it's a type of denial. I don't have a choice but to live in the present, which makes it hard to learn anything. I turned fifty in October last year, and this month a mole on my leg went black and irregular, and my fecal test came back positive for occult blood. The mole was removed and lab results determined it wasn't melanoma. My colonoscopy is scheduled for November. Now my mind moves away from my inevitable encroaching mortality, away from the three years in Los Angeles when I could only afford $2 a day to eat, and I exercised under a thick blanket of smog and wildfire smoke, away from the processed meats I ate all through college, away from the toxic imprint I've always left on mattresses. I'm already drifting toward the metaphors of autumn and the way vivid color still splashes around even as everything is dying, toward the new purple flowers that sprouted up from piles of fallen leaves near my house, toward the cycles of rebirth where there's always a fresh start regardless of what environment you're born into, toward all the canvasses ever punished by artists that yielded masterpieces, toward the continuing relevance of old men. For instance, Paul McCartney is a geriatric turtle and he has the number one album in America this week. Thus I've successfully deferred this question until next year.

On October 12, 2017, I gave birth to Oz. It was certainly one of the most significant experiences of my life. The labor was brief and relatively painless. I went into labor in the late afternoon at work but wasn't even sure I was in labor. My cramping was incredibly mild. I still wasn't sure I was in labor long into the night, not even on the way to meet the midwife at the birthing center at 2am! When she checked me, I was nearly fully dilated. My mother-in-law Tema drove immediately from Long Island and joined us at the birthing center. I got into the birthing tub and I got out less than three hours later with my baby! I loved giving birth in the tub, and I loved the birthing center experience. Then my placenta would not come out. I needed to be transferred to the hospital in an ambulance. I was not yet frightened. Then at the hospital, they yanked on my placenta for several hours while I lost more and more blood. Finally, the OB who was supposed to treat me arrived and she said, "I'm going to do a manual extraction. If it works, it'll be over in a minute. If it doesn't work, we may need to do a hysterectomy! This was the scariest moment of my life. I meditated through it and the manual extraction was successful. Thank God! (though I did lose 2/5 of my body's blood and had to have a blood transfusion afterwards). My parents had not come down for the birth because it was so fast and in the middle of the night. That was reasonable to me. But they did not come in the morning because my mom said she figured that Tema was there. Tema is not MY mother! I was shocked that my mother would not be there in my most life threatening experience. I believe this also may have been a turning point where I take more care of my parents than they do of me from now on.

For my 50th birthday in a few weeks I am throwing myself a party at my house, which I never let anyone into. I have worked hard to make it "company ready". I wanted to be surrounded by friends and family on this special day and thought that would be the highlight of my year. But then this happened. My daughter, found out she wouldn't be able to make the party (new amazing job offer). So, she instead rallied the family to arrange to take me on a trip that I always wanted to take but didn't think was possible. Family and friends chipped in and made it happen. I just got back. I am so humbled and grateful and overwhelmed not just at the trip but that my daughter and others thought enough of me to make it happen an pitch in. I am absolutely floored at the outpouring of love. The trip was an amazing gift, but the gift of love was even better.

My father died this year in December, and it was a hard thing to go through. I am still going through it, actually. Because of the mess he left things in, I have focused on taking care of my mom, and I'm a little resentful of the fact that he left such a mess. Also, as of late, information about his infidelity has surfaced again and he didn't leave things clean. It's a struggle.

I took a plane trip for the second time since 9/11. I was surprised and irritated by all the hoops I had to go through this time, though I can understand why they've been put into place.

Youngest daughter got married. Became an official "empty nester". Glad she's happy. I feel very blessed that she found someone who seems to be good for her. --Who sees these answers?

I'm continuing to grow into myself, learning to acknowledge my needs, my potential, and I'm beginning to understand the many ways people see me. Through my personal life, through my involvement in the synagogue and through my career, I represent different things to different people. Some of these impressions, I strive to live up to, while I resist and try to correct other assumptions about me. Yet I continue to discover myself as I explore the many things I am to all the people in my life.

My 83-year-old father-in-law, George, died after a year of increasing decline. He was always kind to me. His funeral was attended by about 250 people, the reception by about 200 people. He touched so many people's lives. My 83-year-old biological father, Bruce, to whom I had not spoken in over 30 years (the first time we met I was 18-years old, the last time we spoke was when I told him his first grandson was born - he did nothing to acknowledge or develop a relationship with my son, his grandson, Dan), he lived alone and largely estranged from the community, and his other children. He died after a short illness. There was no funeral. No one would have come. The contrast in lives lived and remembered was stark and stunning. Then the scales fell from my eyes. It struck me that I did not recognize that George was more of a father to me in the 11 years that we knew each other than I ever had ever. I feel regret that I did not recognize and more fully cherish that relationship for what it actually was for me. I am grateful for what he showed me in how he lived his life, treated others, treated me, and the legacy he left.

Significant experiences were plentiful this year. Roger tore his rotator cuff & bicep in May. He was finally able to have surgery in late August. He is now going through physical therapy and has been allowed to drive himself again in just the last couple of days. It has been difficult having to pick up some of the slack around the house like mowing the lawn, making sure the garbage is taken out & then the can put out at the curb, and fixing the squeak in the dryer. I've picked up more chores and cooking as well. There was a lot of post-surgery "nursing" as well. It took a large toll on my sleep and stress level in general. For the most part, I haven't minded any of it. The only frustrating thing was watching him do things that the doctor told him not to & having him ignore me or get irritated with me for pointing it out. So I have worked on keeping my mouth shut. I have gotten a lot quieter about a lot of things. I have found that I have more faith in myself and my abilities to not be so dependent on him. My 2nd granddaughter was born and was healthy, no trip to the children's hospital for her, which was a huge relief. I like her, and everyone loves holding a baby. I find myself jealous of the time I used to have with just my first granddaughter and myself though. I am sure that I will grow closer to the baby as she grows and develops a personality. My youngest son got married to a woman I didn't care for too much at the beginning but love so very much now and was so thrilled at their wedding. I lost a lot of weight for the wedding. I may have lost track a little. I have developed a very unhealthy attitude about eating and my weight. I am pretty sure, as is my doctor, that I have an eating disorder. I'll get some help once I reach my goal weight.

Unfortunately, this year was kind of unremarkable. Which, is an event unto itself. I hate that as an unmarried, nonparent, my years can get REALLY repetitive. While I know that I've had value and worth over the past year, it's almost like the past 365 days have been wasted. I've sort of decided that it's time to move on from my job, but can't do anything about it, hence the unremarkable year.

My youngest son graduated from High School. In some ways the affect was joy (happy for him that he is done with HS, he is so ready for the freedoms with college and beyond). And in some ways it has been sad, as he now spends less time at home and is less dependent upon me. Most days I choose to be happy, and excited for his future, and curious about what I will put in the empty space that he will leave. Another significant experience has been my Father's diagnosis of Alzheimer's and his slow decline in memory as well as his decline in mobility from his heart failure. I have more sad episodes as I sense that his death could come soon. I am also finding myself happy that he and I know each other, respect and love each other. I don't think there is anything that I haven't told him that I would regret if I don't have the opportunity.

I learned how to save money xx And I’m not in debt for the first time ever xx I’m grateful, relieved & inspired that I can achieve something like this all by myself xx

Cousin and hubby moved to LA. Spent some quality time with them, and their cat. Found meaningfulness in having family nearby. Spent Thanksgiving with brother in Huntsville with mom in tow. I don't think she has travelled so far in a long time. Why does that make me sad? Also, considerable time at the dentist office. Darn root canal - but glad I'm taking time and money to take care of myself. No more doom and gloom - life isn't going to end soon, so it seems.

Losing my job. Affected me more deeply than I imagined. I stayed positive throughout the process but as I started the task of job hunting I found it had struck a deep chord about my sense of my own worth. No matter how many people told me I was great & would find a job easily (and there were genuine) it didn't feel like that. I'm a high achiever and always excelled, I was still out performing when I was sacked. My team were bereft. It happened last month without warning & I sense I'm still grieving. I'm on a roller coaster: good days all is fine & I have perspective; bad days I wonder what I'm going to do with the rest of my life & how I'm going to support my young family.

Cancer - Right now, I'm honestly not sure. Being in remission is wonderful, and I feel very lucky that my prognosis is good and treatment expected to be successful. Mental health-wise, though, I don't feel very well. I think I feel confused more than anything. From what I can tell, the time post-cancer is frequently romanticized and presented as encouraging a thirst for life or a deep gratitude and appreciation of all that could have been lost. Rationally, I do feel those things. But practically, I don't know how to enact them. Most days I don't even know how to put one foot in front of the other. It's a strange conundrum. I am definitely grateful to be alive, I just want to DO something with this life now, and have no idea where or how to start, so I feel a bit paralyzed.

This year we took our eldest grandson, Kaleb, on the first of what we hope will be life-changing trips for each of the grands/great-grands. The social culture he was introduced to was very different from that in his own home. We were proud that we were able to share this experience and hope that it lit the flame of possibility for him. I feel inspired to keep this tradition going because the kids are so far away and we see them so infrequently.

Significant Experience in the past year, well travelling was great. Moving to Dubai was the big change or experience, understanding my timeline of how it took me 6 months to accept the change, after giving up on all activities. And then the slow gradual changes or efforts to improve, the drawbacks the constant failures. Just taught me that I have to keep improving all the time, Step at a time. Writing has been re introduced in my life which is frankly a big change. Maybe my need to express myself is not to express to public but just to get thoughts and Ideas out of my head. So I've started a bit of that. Grateful for all experiences, moving to Dubai is something I am still resentful about. Hopefully when I read this One year later, I will have either moved or gotten used to this city.

I don't even know where to start. So much happened this year. I started my first year teaching so unsure of everything and ended as a lead teacher, surviving the most stressful winter i've ever had. My co left on maternity leave and I stepped it up in a way I didn't know I could. I am so proud of myself. I went through terrible health issues, hormonal imbalances and infections, major weight loss, and all the while falling in love with someone so unexpected. I can't believe I found love again, and this time the love was reciprocated. I went from being so unsure about our future to feeling like our connection was so strong we could overcome anything; mental illness, uncertainty, long distance, and even cancer. As it turns out, love was not enough in the end and I am still experiencing the repercussions of his actions. I did however learn something very important about myself... I am very strong and confident enough to make the toughest kind of decision, the kind that means walking away from something that I didn't want to imagine my life without. I have the capacity to love and understand whole-heartedly in the face of great pain and betrayal of trust. Although I am so very hurt, I am grateful that I will be able to get through it because he was completely honest with me, which means I value honesty more than I thought I did. Despite everything, I still think we had a beautiful relationship.

My marriage fell apart. My career took off. I moved back home. I feel numb.

I visited the Sldo Leopoldo Foundation and found my “home” at the shack.

We sold the house and moved. Am I grateful? yes. Relieved? yes. Resentful? not much. Inspired? too much!

So much has happened. I had my Mikveh and Beit din 12-10-17, my now ex husband moved out early Jan 2018. I ran a marathon the end of March 2018 and didn’t break any bones this time. Signed final divorce papers and was granted divorce decree the end of May 2018. Went on a trip to Finger Lakes with the Harrisburg Bike club and some friends. Very unexpectedly met Ken. Wow. It’s been an incredible time with him ever since. I also took a DNA test as did many of my family members. I was able to confirm the suspected Jewish ancestry in my family. This was exciting even though I had already formally converted and would have had to anyways, it was cool to find out. I’m grateful and inspired that I was finally able to finish a marathon, it’s been a long journey. I am relieved to have gotten divorced and be able to work on myself. I’m hopeful for the future.

I returned to therapy in Spring 2018 once I realized my anxiety was causing me to make decisions I wasn't proud of, to behave irrationally, and to not be my best self. It has been incredibly powerful to have a therapist whom I trust and who I can feel helping me.

Wow, so many things. I had just run my first ultra race (40M Grand Traverse), which has become a full-on love obsession of mine. Now it feels like I've been running like that forever, but it's nice to put into perspective that I'm really just beginning. I'm a focused and disciplined person, and very physically driven, so this is a way I get to channel that and constantly push my limits a little further away. In this way, I work toward my potential every day. I also happen to be writing this with a foot injury, and I'm reminded how hard it is for me to not get to run. It's a reminder to always take a moment to recognize the immense gratitude I have for the health and privilege to run. I look forward to getting back after it.

This is the year my son was born. He has rocked my world and shaken me to the core - in the best possible way. I am grateful beyond words. I see the word completely differently. I react to others in a whole new way. He inspires me to be a better person and to leave the world a better place for him in the micro and the macro. I am not relieved - I worry about everything now, more than before. Where I may have been able breathe and find peace with world events before, I can no longer. When leaders don't lead and create a future for our little ones that is less safe, or just less, I become resentful and infuriated. Over all, though, my world has been expanded. I have more capacity for emotion - especially love. <3

The year has gone so quickly. I think the most significant is that I feel a growing distance from my first daughter, and it worries me. I don't really know how to reconnect with her, but I know she is hurting and feeling jealous, of the baby and she brings this with her into everything she does, but I don't know what to do about it. I need to figure this out for her sake and ours. I want her to feel safe and loved.

I completed my first year in a new professional position and had my annual review. I received good feedback, positive feedback. I felt appreciated, competent, encouraged to do more.

Alex finally apologized (and meant it) after his marriage to Jasmine didn't work it. I thought it would help me forgive him but it turns out I don't feel any different. It doesn't change the past.

I started my first managerial job this year, and it's been a baptism of fire but I am constantly surprising myself with my ability to actually manage people successfully, and in the best way.

Mums death.... how she faced it and managed it was inspiring. Her illness and her passing has left an indelible mark ... I’m grateful for her life, love and for what she taught us in word deed and example ... I am relieved that she is in a better place and no longer suffering. I am concerned for dad and anxious as to how I will face the future ... I’m not sure that I have processed or felt the grief of her passing

I had my ptsd come back full force and almost lost my ability to function. I handled it well, but overworked myself to the point of exhaustion. At the same time, I moved forward, applied to the university, got in Social Sciences and am starting classes next week. I'm now open to starting a romantic relationship after so many abusive ones, and I'm working towards being able to set healthy boundaries and only go to where I'm comfortable in all areas of life.

I finally have a good job working with good people while working from home. Living the dream! Even on difficult days, I feel grateful. It's really a beautiful arrangement. I will not take it for granted. I worked my ass off to get here -- to a place where I feel like I can do good work without work controlling me. I didn't know this was the goal, but now that the professional life I envisioned for myself has become a reality, I can define it more clearly. This is what I wanted when I yearned for work-life balance. The ability to do my work well and still be me. (In pajamas.) WOW. I am so grateful.

I met B this year, my boyfriend. It's been a while since I fell in love and we're enjoying each other. We have a hard time sometimes and I'm not used to being in relationships that can get hard at times. But I think its good because he's pushing my edges a bit and I think this is what growth looks like. I hope in the future to be better at addressing my concerns quickly, kindly, and clearly.

Sold the house I inherited from my Dad, moved out of state away from friends and family, bought a new house in a new town to be near my new grandson with my new husband. It is also a financially smart move. I find I am lonely and irritable a lot, though I still think it is the right move and I like my new home and area.

I no longer work 5 days a week. This is stressful in that I no longer make the same money. it is also great because I get another day to myself and my work life balance is much better time wise. I wonder if I am being productive enough though and if I will find a new job that will afford me this kind of balance going forward.

i turned 65, and tried to understand the gravity of that and all that it means. what's next? what's left? am i prepared? after our parents passings, my husband and i discuss our old-age future at length - how will we avoid the pitfalls they encountered.

I broke with Summer. What I broke is fair to question, but it was clearly a deeply held, romantic interest on my part, and it is important progress for me that this happened. This took too long to happen, and I should have realized where this was headed back in June of 2014. She is mean as a snake. I have learned this, and also not to try and change someone too long when they're not ready for a relationship. I feel better now, but at the time it was horrible.

My son was born prematurely. He had a hard time in the NICU, was released too early, and had to be readmitted several times and have surgery to place a gtube button. I was devastated by the whole experience and really resent how the healthcare system in the United States treats women and infants.

We visited a fertility specialist this year. In a way it was a good thing, it let us know what was going wrong. It’s also frustrating because we aren’t any closer to being parents.

I participated in the NYC Women's March this year, which was a great day for two reasons. First, it was uplifting and inspiring (like the previous year's march in Oakland) to see how many people in my community are outraged about the state of our country and culture under this administration. How many people are sure that there is a better, kinder, more egalitarian way to be as a society. I always spit when I pass a property of our non-esteemed leader, but it was fun to be part of a crowd, progressive waves of folks shouting and gesturing and spitting as we passed. Second, I was there with Leah, the cute queer girl I had met at minimester just after the new year. She had invited me to join her and a crew of people from the LGBTQ synagogue with our rainbow kippot and Torah quotes about justice. The march was the day I knew that I really liked this girl and wanted to ask her out (though I didn't have the guts to do so for a few more weeks). There was a moment she was walking in front of me and everyone came to a sudden stop. I almost bumped into her, and had the urge to slip my arm around her waist and kiss her behind the ear--it seemed so natural! But I didn't, because that would've been incredibly inappropriate in that context as we were marching in support of consent-seeking and women's autonomy. Next year, assuming there will be another march--assuming there will still be plenty to protest--she and I will attend together in Jerusalem and we can kiss all we like.

Going abroad! I mean I'm here now. But jeez this is crazy that I'm LIVING in Argentina. I love that a lot and even though each day is craziness of navigating transport and speaking a completely new language, I think it's so important for me to be out of my routine. I am just proud of myself for sleeping and not stressing. And I think the other thing was mainly I figured out how to work out and eat without it stressing me out, either making me feel insecure or feel like a chore. I can do it when I want and love that.

My husband and I moved to a new city without ever having been here before. Or only visiting once to look at places. Moving has made it clearer that I'm ready to handle whatever comes our way in life. Wherever we are, we draw strength from eachother and I'm grateful for that. I'm also grateful to be pushed outside my comfort zone and get to explore new cities and restaurants and parks and even states. And it's nice to still have my friendships from back in Pittsburgh. I think it shows that they're strong friendships and good people who I think will be in my life for a long, long time.

It is no doubt my relationship - finding love and intimacy in ways I never expected. I am grateful beyond words, as I felt like my life has opened up - that I've found new meaning - that I have found a way to navigate each day with meaning. That I can see my future - that I can process my days and nights with someone, that I've found a place to put ands hare all this love that's been inside me. It's made me slow down - it's quieted my need top constantly multitask - with her, in every moment, I feel present but also excited and vibrant like no other time. As the post-it on my wall says, "she makes me excited to be alive."

My daughter started preschool about a month ago. I am many of those things: grateful, relieved, and inspired. I have high hopes for her success - in health and happiness. That hope pushes me to hope even more for myself.

The love of my life was diagnosed with the C word - yes, cancer. It was terribly frightening at first but then we realized it wasn't deadly and rather it would be a quick process of getting rid of it, with the hopes that remission would last a long time. In the beginning there was lots of running around to doctors, doing research and decision making and we were in active mode, but "shock" mode. I am grateful that we got through the chemo process with grace, no infections, had some fun in the hospital and relieved that the cancer was gone after 3 treatments. My husband was an inspiration in his ability to take control of his care, do his thorough research, become an expert in his type of Cancer. He also had a really good attitude throughout the treatments. We hit a few hurdles as I wanted to do some things for myself (retreat, mosaics class) on chemo days and he needed to get used to the idea of someone else being there for him...I didn't feel resentful per se, but did want my newfound voice to be heard.

This year's significance is in its sameness: my mom is 92 now and continues to be healthy and pleasant and mostly self-sufficient. Her life is predictable and she's surrounded by people who love her, even if she is increasingly zoned out and more and more conversations flow past her. I wonder how it will end for her, and when. I know that after she's gone I'll miss her and regret wanting it to be over. I think about how I will be when I'm elderly, and hope that don't lose my dignity or become a burden. That sounds like I'm saying my mom is a burden, and I don't want to remember this time that way. When I asked myself what was significant about the past year, I searched for what was new, and couldn't find much of anything substantive. Significance isn't the same thing as newness, and I think I'm being invited to learn to travel in the river when there seems to be no current.

I got married to the love of my life!!! It was the best thing and the most unbelievable blessing that has happened to me. Every single day I am more and more and more grateful for him and our silly, wonderful, passionate, loving, exciting, dream-like, FUN, relationship/marriage/life. We are the happiest we’ve ever been with each other and we get so excited for what lies ahead for us every day . We’re in our thirties but we feel like kids :)

I got hired at St. Jude where I work in the room service department. It's an interesting & fun experience. I get to meet wonderful children from all over the world. Most of my co-workers are nice and tell the honest truth which is definitely what I need right now. I'm definitely grateful for this job that I've been motivated to be on time (which is new for me). The supervisiors are different from other bosses I've had. Most of the staff and patients are very nice and welcoming.

I got my first "real" job outside of school and moved quite literally across the country to California. This is, by far, one of the biggest changes in my life, and it was not easy making that decision. To say that it has affected me is an understatement. On the one hand, I am grateful for getting such a nice job and for the opportunity to live in such an interesting and beautiful place as the bay area. On the other, I am frequently homesick and lonely. I miss having a regular group of friends. I miss my family. I miss rain (lol). It's only been a few months, but we'll see how things play out. I don't regret taking this opportunity, and I'm sure the homesickness will die off with time, but whether I'll stay in California long term depends on a lot of things.

I'm trying to stay inspired on a big-picture level by how many people in my orbit are dedicated to the resistance and taking back the House and Senate. I'm really grateful to live in this liberal bubble; I'm not sure that I could survive otherwise. Some days, I get overwhelmed by all of it. But I'm trying to be engaged and supportive, doing the best I can, staying positive, and leading by example. Some days are tough...

Being a member of town council has been interesting. Unfortunately it has shown me that my expectations of men are accurate and that there are too many women willing to ride their coattails without much thought of their own. This will take generations to overcome. However, I am amazed at how my daughters see the world and am pleased they are having conversations now that I didn't have until graduate school. I have hope.

My grandmother passed away. When I first answered this q a few days ago (and apparently didn't save it) I know I mentioned a few events...and grandma Shirley passing wasn't even the first. Interesting to me because right now that's the only event I can think of. I was grateful for the opportunity the circumstance provided in getting to know a bit more about my mom and her family's history/experience growing up with a step brother (altho not so labeled). I was also grateful that my mom chose to open up to my brother and I. Altho the initial parts of the conversation were not so forthcoming/congenial, my brother's response to her disclosure changed throughout the conversation, gradually becoming more patient and inviting. I was also inspired by my mom's reaction to my offering her the ring grandma gave her. She has always been very clear that my grandmother is not her mother, yet it seemed to be meaningful to her when I offered it for her to wear in Grandma's honor to the funeral. And throughout the day I noticed her wearing it, and perhaps admiring it.

I got out of the year-long bedbound spell upon being returned to love via the OGT and BouchPigRoast trip of July 2018. Before we left I got an inkling that my depression was starting to wreck havoc with my kid. Bleck. Never again. Pada kept me honest for return to doctor. Bouch kept me tethered to the planet. David kept reminding me of hope and belief.

Bear passing. May. Summer joy, shattered by a cold, haunting call in the pitch blackness of 3 am. I miss Baba so much. I think about him everyday. Perhaps Karma for not thinking about him enough when he was still around. It taught me to appreciate the people around you, to be kind whilst you still can. To look after Mama better. I'm stronger now, though. I think. And I'm grateful to know how much he loved us. I miss you, Baba.

Started my own consulting business! Me the guy who knows he's not an entrepreneur. Made the decision a year ago, incorporated in January, just published my website. Lots of talking to people, some revenue - not as much as I hoped but it's working. I am grateful, happy to be working again, and also find it challenging in good and sometimes hard ways.

I started the Bachelor of Education program beginning of September. I am feeling grateful for being able to follow this path and relieved that I have found a career route that I see myself doing for many years.

The boom festival! It gave us incredible energy, connection and ecxitment about life and our family and oursleves. Im not only gratefull, but at the festival we literally thanked everything and everyone for what it broight to our lives and how it brought us back to love and happiness

Dan and I got together and life has been on an upward swing since then. Falling in love Selling my condo in Dallas Paying off all my credit card debt, omg! So happy, grateful, relieved...it all happened so easy!

Two significant experiences in the past year were attending the New Warriors Training Adventure and getting together with Pam. I am much more aware of who I am and what my mission is out in the world.

A. In November of 2017, Poppa finally let go and passed on. I was relieved to know he was no longer suffering since it was a real challenge to watch his physical decline over the last few years. Although I experienced some grief, I was quite astonished how the sadness of my family (cousins/aunts/uncles) felt separate from my own experience of relief and acceptance. I remember during the funeral the dissonance between the weight of the room and my energy. The dissonance didn't bother me at all, but it showcased the work I had done to accept his demise and eventual passing. I also spoke to him on FaceTime the last night before he passed and he said to me "something is off, Itamar. I can't place my finger on it, but something is off. I don't feel right." I replied, "are you in pain?" and he said "no. I'm not in pain." I was relieved to know that his last night on earth, he was not experiencing the intense pain that had characterized his final 1-2 years. I had wanted to confront him before his passing about his thoughts on his death but the time never presented itself due to his constant physical suffering so I let go of my desire to hear him discuss his death as it approached. I've missed him somewhat this year, but overall am happy he isn't suffering. When writing a speech to deliver at his funeral, I came to a realization that it was his innate curiosity about life, people, and ideas that drove many of his life decisions and open hearted ambition. I relate to this curiosity and hope that my own curiosity will drive me to impact the world the way it did for him. B. On Aug 4 2017 (one year exactly to the day of AVM diagnosis) my mom was diagnosed with DCIS Breast Cancer. The months that followed were followed with appointments, biopsies, and scheduling of her double mastectomy. After the trauma of my brain surgery, my Mom tore the muscles in each shoulder, had her lupus come out of remission, and it was sad to watch her body continue to challenge her own recovery from the lupus relapse. I tried my best to be supportive throughout her struggle by being more physically present in San Francisco. Luckily, Omri was living at home during this time participating in a start up incubator called 500 Startups. During the surgeries (mastectomy & reconstruction), I did my best to reciprocate the love and support she provided during my recovery. I slept by her side and walked her to the toilet throughout her first few nights, as well as took charge of tracking her medication dosages through the days following each surgery. I was proud of my ability to be there for her while maintaining a psychological distance that didn't take over my ability to pursue my own life opportunities, mainly at work. I did experience some resentment toward the amount of travel I had to do for her health because it sidetracked my ability to prioritize my intentions from last Rosh Hashanah to take dating more seriously. I was unable to prioritize dating in a serious way given that I was spending 1-2 weeks in SF every 4 weeks for about 4-5 months. At the end of her breast reconstruction recovery, I experienced the familiar (severe) pain in my left leg for 2 weeks, which lead to the diagnosis of fibrous dysplasia. C. In August of 2018, my excruciating leg pain came back in my left thigh. I was convinced it was a stress-induced muscle spasm caused by an intense 3 week work trip. The pain got severe and I could barely walk and was using all the tools I had to try and make the pain subside (sleep, baths, acupuncture, massage, pain killers, more baths, more sleep). Unfortunately, after it was not improving I went to see a neurologist, then an orthopedic, who immediately sent me to get an X-ray and then to an MRI, after noticing a swelling in my femur bone. I was diagnosed with fibrous dysplasia after the MRI and have started to see bone tumor specialists to begin to make informed decisions about the most appropriate intervention. I've been feeling quite frustrated with having to take on another medical diagnosis that will demand a surgical intervention and the prioritization of my body/recovery. It feels like I was just starting to see the light of a life without the shadow of daily fatigue After 2.5 years, I was starting to imagine the possibility of prioritizing getting out into the city, taking classes, seeing art, dating, playing tennis, going to yoga and dance classes. However, the cards I've been dealt have dictated that if I want to invest in my longevity, I'll need to reinforce my weakened femur with some metal in my body (and perhaps bone grafting). There have been a few moments where I've seen the possibility of reorienting my yearly intentions around nourishment, but largely I've been avoiding taking on this upcoming challenge. I've been allowing myself to just be frustrated for a few days as I process this latest diagnosis. D. Woody asked me to start a new team at Lyft, which was a great validation of the impact I've had on the company. For the first time in my professional life, I've had the experience of setting a vision/mission, building an initial roadmap, hiring and managing two people, and trying to scale the impact that I had on the GMs, across all our local teams. It demanded an increased commitment to Lyft (a lot more travel for team summits), which I was ready to make, but also sidetracked my commitment to building my life in Brooklyn and taking dating more seriously. I'm proud of the impact we've started to make, and hope to continue to build programs that help our distributed team members be more productive and have unparalleled career experiences while at Lyft.

I gave birth to a baby girl, my little Neely Dot. It was and continues to be the most significant thing in my life. She is coo'ing in the other room. I had her without an epidural and the moment that she came out was incredibly powerful and spiritual. I felt like the strongest woman in the world. I felt so bonded to her and like she was my muse. I am so grateful for her life- she's made our lives fuller and more meaningful. The process of becoming a parent is like having to rise to the occasion each and every day. Only 4 days after she was born, my mom went to the hospital- also quite significant, because I was so emotional from giving birth, underslept and borderline manic. I somehow got through that period, but it left a mark. I was simultaneously euphoric from having a daughter and also really afraid for my mom's health. I wanted my family to be by my side for this and it felt like I had been abandoned. However... they completely showed up for us for her baby naming. My mom did everything and made me feel like I was a kid again. Lexi made cupcakes, my sister was on decorations and it felt really good to be able to celebrate Neely's birth. Thank god she wasn't a boy- the naming would have had to be at Memorial Sloan Kettering.

I got married. I am resentful of the way I was treated by my parents leading up to the wedding including the wedding day but I am grateful to my brother for stepping up as best man before and during the wedding. I'm grateful to my parents for hosting and having such a beautiful place to host our wedding. I'm resentful of our wedding planner and caterer who canceled on us and the other crappy vendors. I'm grateful to all of our amazing friends who contributed to putting on the wedding. I'm resentful of my wife for pushing to have it in May instead of waiting which put extra pressure on our lives and left me largely in charge of most of the negotiating. I am relieved it's over and went pretty well. No lawsuits. I don't think weddings are necessarily magical events, they are about revealing who truly cares about you and testing your resolve and resilience. Hard to focus on the positive aspects but I suppose I'm inspired by those who helped (Rhino, Pearl, Stashleigh etc).

Getting broken up with by my ex for religious purposes. It was not a good experience but has changed me in a better way.

Well, one of my dearest, closest friends died rather suddenly. I am bereft to say the least. It changes everything in my life for sure. I miss him every day. Tears well up in my eyes at some point every day. I now understand why sometimes a person dies and their partner dies soon afterwards. I have some insight as to what happens when a person thinks they “can’t go on”. I am not there, but i see the edge of it. I am not relieved, or resentful. or inspired. I am angry he smoked himself to death. I am sad we didn’t realize how his body was under stress. Not that it would have helped. Dr Brian is sorry he didn’t check Larry for clogged arteries. Which is what he had. Stroke.

When Henry left for 5 weeks this summer to his dad's house - the longest I've been without him, I was able to put myself first for the first time in 15 years. At first, I wasn't sure what I wanted or needed, and I tried to say yes to many things. The month of putting myself first was the most happy and renewing time that I've had in ages. I felt calm, I felt restored. I felt like I was finally on the shore instead of treading water.

Losing my two pug dogs while I was away on holiday. It completely changed my life forever, I now no longer believe in trusting people until they can more than prove it, I doubt the intentions of people I don't know. And all this because I was tricked by someone I thought I could trust when actually I couldn't and because of them I am now in a legal battle that has been ongoing for nearly a year now to get my two precious furbabies back home where they belong with me.

I had two really significant experiences last year. One was the sickness of my father. He spent almost 3 months in and out of the hospital, which made his health go worse... I had to take care of our company and assume more and more responsabilities. On one side, I was upset for all the suffering that was going on. On the other, I was quite satisfied I was able to cope with all the suffering and the stress it brought. The second situation was the birth of my second son, Juan. He brought much joy to our lifes and was quite inspiring to me.

My grandmother and aunt died. It was a difficult experience in so many ways, as grief is it's own unique and misunderstood energy, and the enormity of two deaths happening within a few days and the realization that I had no direct ancestors on my mother's side remaining was unsettling and disorienting. It felt overwhelming, and yet I was shown, once again, that I am stronger than I think and that I can do more than I think I can. I am grateful to have this perspective and be able to move forward in my life with reverence for my family and a devotion to their memory as I move through my life. And I can feel their energy with me, supporting me from the other side.

I reached a breaking point in my marriage. I thought I might even have to leave. I think, for the last several years I have thought I couldn't survive on my own. I didn't want to. I still don't want to be alone but I realized that I would/could if I had to. I don't think I would have reached this conclusion if it had not been for the rise of women in the US this year. While things are going good in my marriage as I type (the longest stretch of good in years) I am grateful for that moment when I realized that could leave if I had to do so. I had forgotten my strength. No more.

This year has been kind of blur if I'm honest. I've spent a lot of it really miserable because of my job, although that has gotten a lot better the last couple of months. Probably the biggest thing is Jason starting dialysis. How did that affect me? It kind of terrifies me still. I am in brave-face mode, but I'm still so afraid he's going to die. I still feel like we're in non-stop survival mode and I wonder if my life will ever be any different. I'm starting to think this just might be the way of the world for me.

My favorite pastor died. I am not religious, but had worked closely with him for a number of years. I had planned on him speaking at my funeral. Since I moved across the country, I was unable to attend his funeral. He was a dear friend and I had looked forward to seeing him again. It put things into perspective, and made me reconsider my priorities. Whose funerals would I fly to from anywhere, no matter what the circumstances? Who would travel halfway across the world to attend mine?

collapse of the business. frustrated, angry, sad, useless, impotent

I changed jobs, which is completely insignificant compared to Jackson’s birth- but that was last year. This affected me greatly, as I can’t even describe the weight off of my shoulders leaving my old home school. I am incredibly relieved. So far my new school seems pretty good, and almost anything is an upgrade. I feel inspired to put my time and energy into myself. I feel renewed, and as if I have a positive outlook again. I feel as if I have so much more potential because of turning over a new leaf.

Still dealing with depression... I thought after the EMDR helped deal w/the hell of PTSD that would mean the depression would be gone, too. Recognizing I’m still depressed - even if not as deep/bad as it has been in the past - took time to come to terms with. I am grateful and relieved I finally came to realize why I still felt depressed. I was able to get to a point where I could make a choice to do something other than keep taking medication that didn’t give me the relief I keep hoping for.

Lots of small things and nothing that big. I did realize that if I stay in one place longer, rather than traveling weekly on work, it does help my health! I'm relieved to know that things like my BP can be bought under control if I can manage to curtail travel and ensure exercise and most importantly sleep.

I spent 3 weeks in Israel this past summer. It was an amazing experience but also very different than I was expecting. I didn’t feel as much of a spiritual connection as I thought I would but connected deeply to the land itself. I am incredibly pleased that I had this experience

I bought my first car! At the beginning of the year I had no plans to do anything like that. My main goal was just to pass my driving test, which seemed like a nearly insurmountable challenge. Then, before I knew it I was at the Honda dealership signing the paperwork for my new baby. I’ve loved the car every day since I’ve had it and I feel such a sense of pride every time I get behind the wheel or gaze at it from my apartment window. Cant believe it took me this long to get to this point! But I'm amazed by how little we can predict the future and where we will be even months from now.

I totally changed my life around. I was offered a great job after being retired, and disabled, for 5 years. Moved back to CA from NY and started working. I am grateful, and inspired. I’m learning a lot from my participants who are mostly homeless, and all have mental health issues. And I am way too stressed.

This spring, I was named as a finalist for a major fellowship with a significant financial scholarship and access to lifelong network of distinguished leaders. In the span of a month, I met with mentors and alumni, who graciously gave their time to rehearse an in-person, 30-minute interview. While I was disappointed with the final outcome, I learned a lot about myself during this valuable process - including how to brag - and greatly appreciated the opportunity to further reflect upon my future, personally and professionally.

This year is about defining and redefining priorities. I learn a lot about what can and cannot change, and as a result, what I can do to move myself forward around it. This year is also about cementing further and further how we work as a team, Rahul and I. We're at the nucleus of our family now, and every decision we make, is for our family first before anything else.