What is a fear that you have and how has it limited you? How do you plan on letting it go or overcoming it in the coming year?
I have several fears: I fear that I will a never think I am skilled and experienced enough to be confident consistently as a new musician. I fear that because of my moderately good looks, confidence, optimism, and variety of talents and skills, I will continue to inspire resentment, jealousy, and sabotage from my inner circles. I fear that I am too complicated as a person to be in a loving relationship. I can understand others, and fit parts of me to them, but there hasn't been anyone who can understand me because I am too intimidating, intense, and honest. I fear that I will not achieve my goals and aspirations because my health will fail me prematurely, and that all the pain I have suffered in life will have been for nothing. I fear that I will never experience love. I have loved others, and I know that some people are still in love with me. But we are not together because of unideal circumstances, and wrong timing, and because of my own stubbornness and inability to trust just anybody. I continue to let go of my fears by doing the things I want to do, which I love, and which I feel were mine to do. Keeping busy with work keeps my fears at bay. They are there, but they do not rule my life, or stop me from taking one more step forward.
I think I'm afraid to try being self employed again and really give it my all--despite the limitations of the pandemic, even though I know that I'm happier when I'm working for myself.
There are health concerns for elders around me. There's my bp that needs to be under control or I may have to medicate. I don't know as yet. I think my bp has issues that I can at least partially solve for. Health of the elders in the family, some of it is part of the aging process, so the best I can come up with is to help them with it and understand again that it's not under my control.
I'm actually feeling really good right now. I used to be scared about a lot of things, especially scared that I would never find "the one" who I could be partners and (eventual) co-parents with. Now that I've found her, my ezer k'negdo, I feel like I can do anything.
I think since I quit my Good Job a couple years ago after some burnout, I was limited by some sort of fear of inadequacy, a fear that I'd never have enough. I guess I've sort of been in some scarcity mindset, even as I have been bravely moving towards the outside-the-mold future I envision. I'm getting closer to it, and I hope I'll do more trusting in my strength, and in God, and take risks to say yes to the life giving dreams I dream.
I fear my husband and/or I will have health problems that will begin limiting our everyday living...my way of overcoming this fear is changing how I live and making healthier choices (which I have already been doing for almost a year now). Now I have to trust that these changes are enough and that life will go on as it has and I will not be limited as I grow older.
Him: I have a number of fears. My mother getting significantly worse, physically for example. Another is her dying in that institution alone, suddenly. Outside of those, I think my fear is anyone I know getting COVID 19 and suffering and dying from it. Outside of those health related issues, in the not so back of my mind, I fear (I was fearing) that Trump could win another term by stalling and discounting the election results. I also felt the the groundwork needed and the could result in a limited area confrontation of civil war.. What I mean by that is don't see states en masse, gearing up and fighting about the united states. What I worry more about is large groups of people taking up arms against people they consider to be "other" in very overt manner similar to the destruction of Black Wall Street in Tulsa Oklahoma. It hasn't really limited me, just stressed me out. Overcoming it? By voting and being aware and being willing to speak up. . Her: leaving blank
I fear disintegration -- that what the organization we have built is glued together with bubble gum and duct tape. I will work to overcome it by strengthening the foundations.
I have had the fear of taking risks and making mistakes– this year I have been confronted by the need to make mistakes as at work, I've been pushed to take on more responsibilities that are out of my comfort zone. In the process, mistakes are inevitable, and I have had to learn how to be comfortable with them and turn them instead into a tool for my own growth and development. In a way, I had a realisation that a lot of my motivation for being a good friend, family member, worker, etc. is driven by fear. Fear of losing a loved one or a job, fear of being seen or regarded as lesser. I would like to explore how purpose can be a stronger anchor as to why I am the person I am today.
The fear I have been having for a while now is early onset dementia. I've noticed for a long time trouble with finding words or not remembering a word. I even went so far as to point to something because I couldn't get the word out. I don't know if this is my age, menopause, the times we live in, but it is unsettling. I try not to fret about it. I take notice and am pleased when it doesn't happen or when I recover quickly from an episode. I have had the idea recently that I should look into meditation as a possible way to calm my mind and bring on mental clarity. I am waiting on a book from the library about a certain kind of meditation that my Life Coach does. Check back next year!
Wow this past month has been all about fear. After my wrist surgery, my neural hypersensitivity went undiagnosed and so I was without proper pain management for an entire month. As a result, as I have begun physical therapy, I have been told I need to learn the difference between the bad pain I unnecessarily lived with and the good pain that says I am making progress. The fear comes in that I am fearful of experiencing terrible pain again that I brace myself for pain that may not come. Mindfulness, pushing forward and be gentle when I require gentleness.
I fear being wrong. I fear not being good enough. I fear being insufficient or being deficient or having bad judgment. I am afraid of all these things and so I annoy myself to no end by checking in with everyone to see how I'm being perceived and being generally obsessed with that which I cannot possibly ever fully see holistically or objectively or accurately: myself. I have no plan to overcome it but simply to let go.
Fear of what happens when I let go of my control mechanisms -- my rituals, my processes, my failsafes and checkpoints, my diet structures and body maintenance structures -- causes me to life a pretty rigid life. I've been learning how to be a bit more fluid. I can have self-care rituals that I employ as they fit, as I see fit, as I desire and require them. I can let myself have a treat on a day that isn't Sunday. I can let myself live in balance without marking every last thing on a book. As always, the fear of not being good enough. Of looking dorky in jazz class, of looking fat in ballet. Fear that my students will have weaknesses that demonstrate I'm a poor teacher. Fear that I'll somehow not make our new life in Tennessee good enough to keep Jonathan rolling on his new healthier, more positive and well-adjusted path. Fear that I won't be friendly enough, fear that something about my faith will not be "real" enough for our church. It all boils down to fearing that I'm not good enough. I've made such incredible strides on it since last year when it was engulfing me and stifling my every move. I'm able to take jazz class and laugh and enjoy. I'm not sinking in a depression. And yet when I encounter this question it still comes down to the same thing. Fear that I'm not good enough to truly comfort my mom and sisters. Fear that I'm not good enough to truly deserve Jon's love. As always I will keep facing that fear and reminding myself of the truth: I am good enough, I am more than good enough. I will keep looking for the way that that answer shines most vividly and honestly into my consciousness. I don't have a plan for how to address. I'll just keep addressing it.
Fear of getting sick- want to take vaccine once we are assured that it is safe! Have never felt this vulnerable before- always in good health!
fear of never breaking into the industry I want to work in christ, i don't know
Interaction between other people and failing to resct/ communicate with people efficiently. To react promptly to problems of communication effectively with other people and not hold back e.g. Seize the moment.
I have been caught in fear related to my health. I don't plan to let it go. I plan to address it.
I have no fears that I can articulate. I feel only helplessness at my circumstances and depression. I want to make progress on my depression and work on that.
Drumpf will win e election this year ~ the thought terrifies me. Whether it happens will determine whether I can let go of the fear.
I think I’ve had a fear of commitment. This is not to be confused with a fear of monogamy—that’s not the problem at all—it’s more of a fear of milestones and the passage of time that they represent. I overcame a lot of that fear when I proposed to my SO. I was able to admit that this is the relationship that I intend to be a part of for many years to come, and that there will not be any more first dates or one night stands. The thrill of those experiences was something that I enjoyed in my 20s, but there are other thrilling experiences that I can only have now that I’m willing to let go of those. I need to continue building that mindset and committing to that concept within myself and in my relationship.
With no income coming in at the moment, the fear of losing one of our homes (the one I brought into our late-in-life marriage) is front and center. I have been doing much work to downsize and to visualize life without this place; to really study whether it is a part of me or not. I'm not afraid of being without it but I am afraid of going through the pain of losing it. With our two mortgages out on the CARES Act forbearance plan, we don't have to confront this now. However, unless my husband and I can start bringing in new income immediately we will have to start to release all that we have spent our 40-year careers building.
I'm afraid of not living up to my commitments and disappointing me. This often results in me being overcommitted and spreading myself too thin, plus feeling like I don't have the right to ask for what I need/deserve because I have been exactly perfect at everything.
I have a deep fear of embarrassment that has kept me from pursuing my biggest, brightest dreams. I need to remain committed to my vision despite the risk of not being perfect. There is immense power in DOING SOMETHING BOLD, perhaps more than waiting to do something perfect.
Moving to a new residence. I get used to uncomfortable situations. Being held accountable by others.
I think I did a good job of letting go of Elise last year. Now it's Davids' turn. I think I've developed a much healthier relationship with my body and relationships with men in the past year and I want to continue down that path and I continue to heal from and let go of trauma
I'm afraid I am ultimately unloveable as I am. That my flaws are such that I will never feel the love and community I so crave.
My fear is that I don't deserve good things in life and if I have them, they will be taken away. I am trusting that the good that comes to me is well deserved.
heights? speed? getting physically hurt? I think i'm going to do ski lessons. i've taken two or three before but i think if i put my fears aside and just go, i can do it! i trust lauren and rob completely and they have both said they would be willing to do ski lessons with me. it'll likely be me and their two year old daughter on the bunny hill together lmao but i'm okay with it. i also want to figure out the best way to stay active and have fun this winter -- skiing seems like the best way to do that in juneau!
That I will lose the people I love if I show up completely and authentically as myself. We have such opposite views, values and beliefs. I find myself being nice and quiet, empathetic and considerate. I listen, but rarely speak my truths. And my fear is that they will stop loving me, that I will damage or lose those relationships completely. But, that is not what I want to model for my boys. And that's not who I want to be in my family. So, this next year I want to learn to let that go. By testing boundaries, by recognizing the importance of being true to myself and that these relationships will only evolve if I show up as myself.
Fear of becoming insignificant or outdated in the value I bring to my professional work. I plan to work more assertively at letting go of the fear and overcoming it by continuing to stretch myself, develop relevant and fresh skills, listen super carefully to feedback, ideas, etc. before responding; and trying not to take things so personally.
On May 5, 1983 I was carjacked and beaten severely, but survived. My perpetrator was arrested six months later for the brutal rape and murder of another woman. I have overcome most of the fears that stymied my actions, but I still cannot take walks alone. I don't know if I will ever overcome that one, but I sure hope to have someone come into my life who wants to walk life's path with me.
The fear of other people's opinions (OPO) always lingers in the back of my mind, but I have worked at trying to let that go. This year, I want to work on overcoming my fear of being 'good enough' or 'worthy' within my professional life.
of upsetting the balance of my life by pursuing a creative life. I plan on saying yes, and saying no; of building towards an opportunity that will require me to set aside my business for a while; of making it possible for that to happen.
Finally feeling fears! Afraid of losing Ashur. Afraid of physical unwellness to the extent that I cannot be independent. Afraid of the political situation in this country continuing to escalate to an extent that we do not feel free or safe here. Afraid that in thirty two days trump could be re-elected (just announced this morning that he has covid!). Afraid that the fires will force me to not live in Northern California forever. Afraid that aleph will not follow through and somehow not ordain me. Afraid I will not have children. Afraid society will continue to detrimentally infiltrate the minds of all of humanity. None of these fears are limiting me and I do not want to let go of or overcome any of them. I have been on this lifelong journey searching for fears and it feels so nourishing, and destabilizing, to finally feel them.
Fear of being alone and being my true self. It has stopped me from being in the right relationship as I shuffle quickly into relationships so as not to be alone. Also I do not do things I need to do. I am hoping to do it afraid
That I don't have anything to offer the world. That I won't be able to find a way to contribute to the public good, that I am not moral or clever or organized or hard working enough, or that what I offer is unwanted or unworthy. That I will be seen as corrupt. I am trying to overcome this by working with people who have the skills I lack and need those I have.
I am still afraid of people judging me because my brain is convinced that other people thinking negatively of me will lead to pain. Probably due to the harsh judgements of my mom and the punishments that came when I didn't live up to some ideal in her head. I'm working on remembering that no one can hurt me like that again and it's okay if people are upset because their feelings aren't about me.
I'm deeply afraid of the future. I'm deeply afraid of (my perceived sense of) failure, especially, which is why I'm so afraid of the future-- I don't want to grow up to be a "failure". I can recognize that retail employees, etc, deserve dignity and aren't "less than," but also I can't extend that to myself, Person Who Used To Be Good At Life. One way to be less afraid of the future is to set myself up for a future that I wouldn't be ashamed of, but that's 1) way easier said than done when my industry is dead for the foreseeable future, and 2) not actually letting go or overcoming, it's just avoiding the problem/pushing it into the future (that's the other reason I'm afraid of the future: that's where all the problems are). I don't have a solution, and I certainly don't have a plan, because this is something that is a fundamental basis for how I operate and much more complex than, say, "I'm afraid of heights, so I'm gonna try rock climbing classes!" We'll see what I can get done. Treating the potential ADHD might go a way towards not feeling like a burnout.
I mentioned that I doubt my own opinions and value sometimes. I am also afraid of talking to Chris about having children. It's partly because I don't know if I want them myself. I always assumed that I did, but now that I don't have them I feel - fine? What I don't know is if I'll still feel fine three years down the line when, realistically, my chances will be over. I am frightened of talking to Chris about it because I think I know his answer, and I guess I'm not ready to close that particular door just yet. Sooooo yeah. I think the way I will overcome this fear is when I send these answers to Chris next September...! This isn't a fear as such, but I feel very anxious about the house we live in. Our neighbours share a lot of negativity about certain things (the state of their houses, costs of things like heating, service charge, etc). I feel very affected by this - it makes me really anxious, and I worry all the time that we won't be able to sell the house when we need to. I don't know how to get past this really. Chris tries his best to reassure me, and it works when I'm talking to him, but then the doubts creep back in. He says I should stop looking at the Facebook group but I can't turn this particular tap off! Hopefully I'll be calmer about this by next year.
Fear of never being able to find a place inside of me where I feel home/comfort/security. I think that's the crux of it. I'm doing a lot of work on it now and it seems to be going ok. It's a work in progress but it's going well. I think the only way of overcoming it is by slowly eking out space for me to fill that void with different things/people and to be milder in general.
Apparently I'm terrified of riding my bike on roads! I've gone once, and I'm committed to doing it safely and getting confident while I'm here in Cornwall. That and being vulnerable in relationships again after being hurt. But mostly the bike thing.
Even though I’m becoming content with my singleness, I’m still afraid of not getting married or having a child. I don’t think my fear has limited me. I know that this year I’ve learned how to appreciate my worth and know what I deserve.
Not being loved by someone as an everyday partner. Im not sure I do overcome it exactly but finding the center inside myself to know that it will come one day.
I’m afraid of having gall bladder surgery. Dealing with my gall bladder has been hard and now that I’m pregnant I’m afraid it will get worse. The surgery killed my sister though so I’m terrified to do it myself. I’ve been trying to convince myself to go ahead and do it, because planned surgery is much better than the emergency surgery I’m probably going to end up with.
Fear of not advancing, of not being better. I think the practice of being in the moment is critical for me. I'm often onto the next thing for fear of standing still, which often gives short shrift to the present.
Not being enough to lead others to better version of themselves. Stalled on being more active in reaching out the group(s) that I am passionate about. Value add with ongoing actions thru setting up my online community, working with clients in person and online, selling products and services, speak on podcasts, create videos, be part of forums to discuss topics near and dear to me, write articles and books.
Deep waters and data! I've been practicing my technique in Amanda's pool, but that's about it for now. I got to take more data workshops at GA.
I am afraid of the white pride groups taking control with their guns when Trump loses. I am afraid for our lives and freedoms here in Portland and around the country. I fear for those of us who want a fair and safe world. If Trump should steal the election I do hope we have a coup and take back our government. I hope beyond anything that he loses and is put in prison for the rest of his lonely sad years. My hope is we can put these awful 4 years behind us and focus on the future, on hope and love, on having good people lead us and care about important issues and healthcare and education and equality and police reform and immigration. I will be doing my part by seeing clients and supporting their positive mental health and taking care of myself with self care and nourishment and staying as safe as possible.
I’m so scared of my kids dying or my parents dying. Every time I think of it happening, I feel paralyzed. I’m not sure it’s a fear I can let go or overcome.
One of my deepest fears is that of losing my dear husband to death. And either that will happen one day or I will die first. I don't believe the fear has limited me or our relationship. I feel it has made me live more fully in the present and to treasure every day that we have together and not to take for granted our time together.
The problem with my biggest fear is that it's completely out of my control. It involves the leadership of my country, and how little they value people unlike themselves. I'm terrified about the results of this year's election--things have been so, so bad for the last four years and I don't think I can take another four. At the very LEAST having Tr*mp be re-elected would validate white supremacists and make them feel like their views and actions have a place in this country--they don't. But then even more than validation, he would encourage them, enable them, give voice to them, and I can't stand the thought of it. Not to mention the replacement of RBG--what would that mean for my rights and those of the women around me and all over the country? Another four years of feeling powerless and small and unvalued and sneered at. I can't stand it. I know it sounds dramatic, but I really can't. To be honest, Biden won't be much better. I know that our country's dug itself into a hole and won't be able to get out of it anytime soon. But with Tr*mp the hole only gets deeper. Unfortunately I can't say anything about how I can overcome the fear. If he wins, there's nothing I can do. It'd be so easy to say "let go of the things you can't control," but in this case I can't. I have to fight. And I want to fight! And I will keep fighting! But I have to feel like there's some chance of victory or I lose hope. And I don't feel like I'll have much hope with another four years of this.
Imposter syndrome is a beast. I fear that I am not good enough - not a good enough wife, daughter, family member or worker. It often gets in the way of me being able to do my best at work, or it least to poor self esteem which effects my relationships (particularly when it makes me hypersensitive to all situations). To let it go, I will continue to learn more about imposter syndrome through webinars and courses and I will continue to work on CBT methods about self esteem.
FOMO. Saying no more often.
Another carry-over from last year. I am afraid of remaining stuck in a place (emotionally and physically) where I get by but do not thrive. I am afraid that I won’t put myself in a position to find and take my next step. I plan to find a therapist who is very skilled and who I trust and I plan on working with that person to break through my fear of flourishing.
I fear intimacy ever since my relationship with Andrew. I also fear intimacy as a nondrinker. I think alcohol allowed me to explore my sexuality without shame or fear, and now that I don't use that anymore, I don't know how to even think about being intimate with someone else. But I'd like to start. At least start to be open to it again. That's how I plan on letting it go - slowly start to open myself up to the idea of love again.
Fear of death sometimes limits my life. Meditation
Same answer as last year- fear of failure. Fear of inadequacy, that I'm not good enough. Imposter syndrome. I obviously need to work harder on letting "perfect" go- I can do something to the best of my ability, and that's ok. It doesn't have to be perfect. Much easier said than done.
I've always been afraid to put myself out there and trying new things. In the coming year, I'd like to push myself outside of my comfort zone more often.
A fear that I have.... I am not sure that is so relevant this year. I still fear great vulnerability. I still fear financial hardship. I still fear great changes. I have no plans to let any of these fears go or to overcome them this coming year. I realize I'm writing some of these answers on the day the question vault will be sealed, but please know that these are not haphazard answers. I appreciate my fears, they are not boundaries, I do push through them, but they are still there, never let go or overcome fully.
A fear of opening myself to people, of give myself entirely and ending up losing myself again. I plan on actually opening myself to those I trust and not overly thinking.
I'm afraid of my depression ruining my relationship with my child and negatively impacting his development.
The fear that I am not enough, in all aspects. This has caused me to doubt myself and my abilities countless times and lose out on opportunities. I am going to start trying to believe in myself more.
I worry that I'm just taking up space at work- I'd like to be more active...I hope when things get back to normal I'll be able to get more involved and share more of myself.
I fear offending others. I fear falling short of my own ideals. I still fear sometimes that I am wasting my life. I need to let go of others’ expectations, come to terms with who I am and recognize the contributions I make to friends, family members and society while also making my own joy and happiness a legitimate priority.
I fear a lot of things. I still have self esteem issues and I think that limits what I think I am capable of. I work on it in therapy. Sometimes I really do have to limit myself because of my body but it is sometimes hard to know how to balance things. I also continue to learn how to work better with organization and ADHD.
I have feared failure. This has prevented me from doing innumerable things that may have been enjoyable or expanded my horizons. I've decided, forget it- you miss 100% of the shots you don't take, and courage isn't the absence of fear, it's being afraid but doing something anyway.
Being too much, someone getting angry with me, being wrong especially when I haven't prepared. I would love to fuck it more. Just do it. Be big. By myself.
I have a fear of not being liked and I have a fear of failure. Both of these are long-standing and I hope to work on them this year, even if I can't overcome them. In terms of not being liked, I think part of it is that I should invest more time and energy into my close friendships and less energy into trying to date. I should also focus on things that make me feel good, like writing more and moving my body and singing. Regarding the fear of failure, I think I should work more seriously on having to-do lists and setting reasonable, small, achievable goals. It's hard to feel like there's always more to do and like I just need a pause. But I think if I try to divide things into smaller tasks more, I will be better able to get things done and more importantly, feel good about my work.
obviously covid is the biggest fear, I don't have many fears, but this is a big one, for myself and my family or friends. Not sure I can let it go, I just try not to worry about it and make myself crazy.
good question, wish there was an easy answer. i fear evil, but humans are inherently fucking evil so where does that leave us? maybe the next virus will do what this one failed to do. cleanse the planet. of evil.
I fear that I have failed at life. Failed marriage, no career to speak of, no kids. I need to realise that sucess doesn't always mean those things and that I have contributed to others' lives in a way that I probably can't grasp.
I think my only fear right now is how to decide where I want to live. I have many choices, all diverse. I don’t want to move everything some where and then be completely disappointed in my choice. I think the only way to figure it out is by going places and “feeling” the earth and the air, by seeing what is there. I really hope doing some of that will just tell me somehow what fits. I’m sure that is a tall order, but that’s all I’ve got for now.
I'm still intimidated by dating. Insecurities, fear of rejection, and even fear of success. This has limited my opportunities to have a sustained companionship in my life. I intend to continue to and focus on finding dating opportunities outside my immediate community and religious group. I'd rather date people who are accepting and relaxing to be around even if I have to stretch myself to understand their way of thinking and lifestyle. Ultimately, I need to be around somebody I really like and feel safe with. The style of dating in my community is not flexible enough for my needs and I will seek social outlets in unexplored networks to try to increase the chance of me meeting open-minded and flexible people that I feel comfortable opening up to and sharing with.
I have a fear of not succeeding in my new position at work. I constantly feel overwhelmed and never have enough time to do everything that needs to be done. I constantly feel like I'm on the edge and can crash and burn at any time. I just barely keep up with the immediate needs. It's causing me a good deal of anxiety. Why did I take this on? Hopefully, with time, I will figure out how to manage the work load.
I have a fear of making big decisions, making committments and even sometimes going forward in life. I am lucky to be in a good position right now so entropy keeps me where I am. But I want more, but I dont know how to get it. Tomorrow I'm hoping to buy a car. I'm excited and terrirfied. i dont know how to know if im getting a good deal. i dont know what I dont know and I'm scared to make a mistake. I'm scared of the lack of safety net. I'd like to jump out and try more things, but I'm not sure how
I have a fear that I am useless and I am not able to cope with life and will become homeless, because I am not able to stand up to all the obligations, too weak and not healthy....
I have next to no confidence. I’m afraid of failing and it holds me back a lot. I just need to ask more questions. Maybe I’ll look dumb but I feel dumb when I listen to other people ask the questions I wish I was asking. Appearing smart isn’t as good as being smart.
Strangely it's not for me, it's for the world and for my neighbors. I fear for what we have lost as a result if the inhumanity we have shown each other. I physically ache when I see this happening. All I can do is lead by example, show others humanity, compassion, empathy, and respect, and hope this inspires others.
I have feared hurting other people's feelings, being "found out" as a fraud and of people not thinking highly of me. All in professional settings. I think I redefining what "making a good impression" means and what it means to stand up for myself truly. By standing up for myself, I let go of a bit of that fear. Not to be cliche but I plan to "lean in" to the instinct to be a leader and make definitive decisions more in the coming year.
My fears from last year still hold, but added is the fear for our country and world. We are on the verge of a civil war, started in no small part by the Republican Party utter collapse of decency and sense of unity. They have created a false narrative of an existential threat to this nation and have unleashed all the paranoid conspiracy theories to excite people.
My fear is the collapse of American democracy. I don’t have a plan. I have ideas - live simply, save resources, and keep the family close.
I'm still afraid that I'm divorcing for the wrong reasons, and still feel like it's all my fault and due to innumerable personal failings on my part. I don't believe this really - I don't see it happening in my other friendships and relationships the way it has happened in this marriage. I am so afraid of walking away and I feel like I just need to do it. Scott told me tonight that he doesn't get the communication from me that he needs in order to have a healthy relationship. He doesn't realize that years of his shutting me out, of his angry manipulation, of his belittling, of his talking me in circles - he doesn't realize that all of this could have had an effect? Who even am I anymore? I just sit in silence with my anger. And yet, I'm afraid that the anger IS my fault, that I will always be angry, that nothing will ever truly make me happy. I don't know how to let it go or overcome it. I'm afraid and don't want to be afraid anymore.
Being laughed at. I often don't say what I think of feel because it may sound stupid. Thinking then speaking my truth, and if necessary saying it is me, you may disagree, respectfully, and I will listen.
Hmm I think my main fear is losing people I love. I think this has limited me in that I pull away if a loss is on the horizon. I hope that by recognizing this pattern that I can notice that pull and choose to move toward the person I love instead. Therapy would also help with this.
I feel in fear that I’m in adequate in certain areas. Like food, food preparation, cooking. And handling money, I feel that I am back with money. I feel that money is bad and I fear it. For money, I am going to submerge myself in the can. I am going to learn, I am going to master money, I am going to get out of debt within one year. I will use the resources available through I will use the people available in the program. For food, I am going to use resources like YouTube,Ask Vivian for help, and use cookbooks and just experiment.
I am afraid of being in a car going more than 70 miles an hour. This has turned into being afraid of just being in a car on a highway altogether. I am afraid of being a mother, and I am afraid of getting married. This kind of fear isn't holding me back but is still a real thing. I think I have been afraid of being in a healthy relationship. I think this has kept me dating guys who weren't good for me. So it's a bit terrifying to be dating someone who IS good for me. I'm terrified to mess up. Too many people have been one-and-done with me, and I try so hard to do well at all times. I know this isn't super realistic, so it's absolutely nerve-wracking to think about messing up and still being loved.
My answer from last year is fucking me up because I lowkey am a victim of a National Tragedy right now. We all are. We are all victim to the National Tragedy of the tr*mp presidency and to the pandemic he allowed to thrive. Clearly I haven't let go of my fear of not having a future. I'm not sure that's one I'll ever not have, especially knowing what I know (aka, having a knowledge of history and being able to interpret the present). Last year's answer for my reference: "I suppose I fear not having a future. This has meaning to me in many different ways, in different facets of life. I fear that I will never get on-track for the things I'm supposed to want to have: a career, a relationship, etc. These things are framed in such a way that if you don't start now (here at 23), you will never have them. I'm not even sure if I want all of that, but I fear not setting up the foundation for it now because that's what all the future rests on. (If I don't have/start building these things, will I even have a future?) Or so I've been told. I fear not having a future because I've been a made a victim of a National Tragedy, whatever that means at the time. Will my narrative/life be wrested from me like Chanel Miller or Dr. Ford? Will I be murdered by a misogynist/white supremacist? I fear not having a future because of climate change. What is the point of fearing the lack of a professional future when the climate crisis and the deliberate ignorance of rich people/capitalists will make "normal" life impossible?"
Everything is so scary right now, it’s hard to pick and choose. Plague, fires, protests, political upheaval and the descent into authoritarianism and fascism, the looming possibility of a civil war...it really feels apocalyptic right now, like the end of days is coming way faster than any of us would have thought. It is so hard and so important to be courageous and to just keep calm and carry on (whether that’s “carry on” in the sense of keep going, or “carry on” in the sense of making noise and protesting what isn’t okay). I have a little piece of art I made from a curly piece of dried sea kelp that I found at the beach this summer and the quote from Rabbi Nachman that “the whole world is a very narrow bridge and the most important thing is not to be afraid”, which is something I look at every day when I sit at my desk and try to take to heart.
Had to think about this one. I don't know. Do I have so many fears that the fear is: I am not living honestly and being truthful with myself? I can certainly think of fears related to aging (me, my husband, my mother), related to appearance (weight, wrinkles/aging) and related to relationships (marriage - is mine going to survive? Do I want it to?). And I have no answer for how I am going to overcome this. Sit with it? Feel the fears. Acknowledge and notice them when they arise.
My fear is the older I get the more actually tired I am. This body can't keep up like it used to. I've been going to bed at 930/10 every night. I hope I can stay up late enough to go out when we reopen. I will continue to take one day at a time.
I'm agoraphobic so I fear leaving home. The quarantine has stopped my efforts to go out at least three times each week for more than food shopping. I was able to do that by making appointments with friends to meet for small adventures like going to museums or having a meal together. Now I'm lucky if I get out once a week. I've learned that most of my fear is of white people based on ways in which I was abused by racists as I was growing up. When the quarantine is over, I plan to go back to getting out every week.
Im afraid maybe I have a fear of people judging me and it keeps me from getting close to people.
I fear that I am not as capable as other people believe that I am and that I will let them down. I have just returned to therapy and we will be exploring that fear more.
My mom's dementia. I'm trying to stay more in the day to day than freaking out about the future of it.
This is a hard one. I've always feared not reaching my full potential or getting hit with a wave of depression. But like Jonah just said, depression is only a threat if you're depressed about being depressed. The great fear is fear itself. The trick is to have no fear at all. So how will I overcome it? When I sense the fear come up, talk to it. Ask it, what do you want to tell me? Where am I holding myself back because of this fear and go forth in small steps if that's all you can muster to tackle the fear head on. To combat the fear of not living into my potential (what does that really mean? avoiding life, getting distracted?) I commit to asking big questions, listening to the signs of the universe, the messages that only I can hear that guide me forward, and taking inspired action on those signs. That way, life unfolds organically in the direction of my higher calling.
I dread the possibility of a drumpf re-election! I am seriously considering leaving the country, I will vote Blue!!!
I have a fear of people perceiving me as powerful and feeling threatened. This has been causing me to play small in certain areas of my life. I am going to take seriously the idea that what other people think of me is none of my business.
My fear is of not living up to my fullest potential. Leaving projects unfinished. Setting out ideas that others enact but not moving myself. Not knowing where my blind spots are, where I am tripping myself up. Spending too much time being angry, hurt, disappointed rather than taking proactive action. Not stepping into shoes which might seem to big for me but in fact fit me just fine. And not knowing that they fit. How to let go? Hmmm. Continue work in therapy, which will become group therapy and much needed for me to learn about how I come across to others. Keep trying on courage, keep chipping away at something that seems too big, too complicated to repeatedly show myself that I CAN do it, I DO do it.
I'm afraid of failing, of choosing the wrong thing, of living a small life. I don't know how to let this one go. It's been a fear of mine since I was very little. Maybe the alternative is just to "start somewhere and begin to move?" I'm not really sure how else to beat it.
My fear of needles. I made some progress by going to the doctor this year though.
I'm scared of what would happen to me if I end my marriage. It has kept me in this despite the abuse. I hope that I find a way to leave if the abuse doesn't stop despite my fears.
I have a fear of risk to a certain degree. If you were someone meeting me you might not see it or believe it. Within the boundaries of my confidence I am a risk taker! But it's very hard for me to contemplate pushing past those boundaries. For example, I am currently unemployed and know that I am at my career peak in terms of knowledge, skills, etc. I have great ideas and can make amazing contributions. I could set myself up as a consultant and probably grow a successful business. So why don't I? Good question! Fear - that's why. I'm scared I'm not good enough. Who would pay me for what I know? What if I stumble. The fear is a very small, hard, pebble deep inside me. I can almost forget that it's there sometimes. But every once in a while I can feel it. It's painful if I touch it in a certain way. And then I think, I should get rid of that already!! And I make some motions toward doing that. And then I shrink away and go back to my, rather large, comfort zone. In the past several months I have been trying to take steps toward addressing this. Wearing away at that little pebble. For a long time I thought I just cut the thing out. But that would be risky. lol! I have applied for a couple of positions and had some informational interviews that I wouldn't have done before. And it's starting to bear a little fruit. With some bravery and luck who knows?
I have a few fears. They limit me from living a full life. I don't have a plan for overcoming them. I don't believe that I could. That's a terrible thing to write, like I'm saying I can't change, that I don't want to. It's not that. Yes, it makes me sad when I think about it. And I'm ashamed that I can just settle like that. But these are fears. I'm sorry about it.
Failing at my own business. Overcome it? Just start!
My fear of not being loveable enough. Embracing it -- I am enough. I am loveable. I need to keep reminding myself of that.
I have so many fears. Many which pass swiftly after I give them space to be acknowledged - dismissed or just accepted. Other fears stay with me. I have fears around my career, which I wrote about in another question. The fears I am working through today are around my relationship. I am afraid that the ways I have been hurt in past relationships will get in the way of being my best self in the one I am in now. I hope to be able to see and face myself when I am doing this. I hope to have the wisdom to share with my partner when that's an important step in moving us forward.
I fear becoming less connected with society; with Covid-19 many of the opportunities I had for interacting with society have dried up or impart a level of risk that is not acceptable to me as I am in a higher risk group. I hope to discover new avenues of connecting over the coming weeks and months.
my biggest fear seems to be entangled with success and failure. I am daily letting go of the fears and beliefs that I am not as smart or as worthy as others believe of me. I also recognize I have let other peoples needs take me away from what is really important in my life to push me forward. I am standing tall and taking the reigns by letting God guide my steps!!!
I fear needles, irrationally. Since I have to self-inject now, I hope that the repeated exposure will help me overcome this mild phobia. I 'feel the fear and do it anyway' so it hasn't been too limiting, but it is a lot of energy to deal with it. I also fear becoming depressed over the winter and with the isolation of the pandemic, as a clinically vulnerable person. I would like to have someone safe to bubble with.
I’m scared I won’t have a good job and won’t be able to support the family. I’m scared I’ll get stuck in development and get jaded and cynical and not enjoy what I do
I have a fear of not living my life in the way that I want to - just getting stuck on the hamster wheel and never taking risks. I also have a fear of being alone, which I never used to have. I worry that the future I want now involves someone else, which is scary. In terms of letting go, I need to accept that COVID-19 has stunted the possibility of big things happening right now. I need to get comfortable being static for now. Scheming rather than doing.
I’m suuuper scared of Oona in general. Hopefully this year I’ll either get some resolution or do something/something will happen to me that makes me realize I don’t need it.
I always fear failure. It drives my procrastination. It's so straightforward and obvious to me now. It's much easier to recognize it when it's happening. It doesn't last as long or get drawn out for as long because I quickly catch myself doing it, know the reason is because I'm afraid I'll fail, remember that not doing is a route that is guaranteed to end in failure, and then I just do it. I always feel better after. I have less anxiety if I just try to tackle it (most of the time).
I have a fear that my children will move far from me and I won't have personal connection with them. At this point in my life I love my work, which I am lucky to continue, but the family is everything, as my father always taught me. When I am with my grandchildren, I think about how they will remember me, and that they WILL remember me. Of course that's not the most important thing, the fact that they ARE is the most important thing.
I have so many fears now. The constant one is that I will outlive my daughter after her diagnosis last year with cancer at age 24. My other constant fear is that I will have to grow old and will myself die alone. I'm divorced, unpartnered and isolated. I have no family aside from my kids and I have no "best friend." I don't even have anyone to serve as my power of attorney. After I asked 11 people and got 11 "no" answers, I stopped looking. So living with interminable loneliness as the closure of public social spaces that fulfilled me and provided meaning for me -- theaters, dance studios, art galleries, public festivals -- disappear. Living virtually is not living.
I am afraid of disappointing people I care about or having anyone be angry at me. I guess it's limited me by preventing me from voicing opinions or taking a strong stand against someone else's opinion. Also, it's problematic at work when I get a bit paralyzed, of get knots in my stomach, when I'm afraid my boss is unhappy with me. In the coming year, I hope to get better at standing up for myself, being less afraid of confrontation or debate or discussion, and trust myself and my opinions.
I am still privileged to say that I have few fears for myself, yet I have so many more fears now that I had a year ago. I am truly afraid for my beloved country. We were never perfect, but it seemed that we were moving toward equality, inclusion, and protecting our earth. I will continue to work for change and will also continue to try to not let it overwhelm me.
All my live long life I have been afraid that I am being routinely and roundly misunderstood. I look in admiration at women, men, and cats who don't have this fear. Some attain fearlessness at a certain age (along with a purple wardrobe); others are born understandable; or are happily exempt from the whole issue, jiggling their eyes at me as I confess I have a small, permanent, white-hot fear that whatever it was I just said or did has been misconstrued due some flaw in my presentation. Truthfully, this one isn't going away anytime soon, but I feel better for having written it down here. Thanks.
I am afraid to trust. I am afraid to let go of the reins, even though it's pretty clear that all my pulling and directing is just for show. I've spent a lot of energy trying to get control of life, and I've constructed a lot of restraints on myself to keep from letting things emerge as they want to. My body, my relationships, my work, my creativity. My voice - what I say and who I am willing to say it to. What if I let it grow and it doesn't become what I think it should be? But there may be reason to appreciate what it becomes on it's own, because it's natural, different, and actually better than what I would've designed. I have no design talent at all I realize, I am only an imitator. Leaving imitation behind perhaps, that would be an interesting pursuit.
I changed my lifestyle by working in the mountains and found that although I had chronic pain in my legs, I kept moving and lifting and walking, and my body became stronger and more toned. I lost weight. Each day since repatriation, at least on some level, I've mulled over the lack of activity in my daily routine, and hoped that I would be able to keep off the weight. 6 months down the line, this niggling doubt most definitely wasn't enough to limit my eating or encourage me to activities as my waistline shows. So I guess I need to completely transform my lifestyle to be healthier and more active - that's something to work on this coming year!
Rejection. But preparing properly and remembering it’s often a question of finding the right fit
I don't know that I have a fear that limits me. I have a fear that my parents will get sick and Covid will keep us from taking care of each other. I have a fear of assholes not wearing their masks and getting me sick. But these are real fears and I don't need to overcome them. They don't hold me back, they are part of life.
I have a fear of getting sick via Covid as I am a health compromiser person. I am not letting it go but am working around it. Staying safe and not putting myself in a bad situations. Staying away from crowds and out of restaurants and bars.
Fear of losing my mind staying home all the damn time. No idea how to let it go. Can't afford a therapist. So I'll do my best I guess. Would love to move out of this country. It's so goddamn stupid.
I have many fears for the world, but I'll speak personally. I have a fear of being judged. Especially at work, but often in life I think about how others will perceive my actions before I think about whether I think it is the right thing for me. I am working on putting my own needs first in a way that improves my self-confidence and my ability to effectively communicate. By being quicker to voice my own opinion, and own the fact that I am speaking for myself and also respect myself/my knowledge enough to share my thoughts, I am becoming more confident and leaning on my own confidence more.
The closest I have to a fear is probably a fear of failing. I don’t think I’m afraid of it as much as I just don’t like it. I think it’s probably at the core of why I want to continue fighting to have a baby instead of turning to adoption. It still remains to be seen whether this will turn out to be a testament to my tenacity or a show of stupidity to avoid what I would consider to be a fail on my part.
i guess generally speaking i just get like, paralyzed w anxiety. i'm never doing enough! and then i wallow in it and then i do even less. i'd like to...not do that! ok!
fear of incapacitation and dependency because of failing health. this fear can be slightly limiting when you have to pay attention to every footfall you take going down one step or a flight of stairs, precipitating a moment of unbalance causing an injury that's merely annoying and inconvenient to becoming a cascading series of serious declining health events. plans to overcome this is "be prepared, stay prepared."
I think overall - my big fear is failure. This can sometimes make me feel stunted - what if I fail at my marriage? At being a good mother? At being a good lawyer? This past year I started working on isolating fights and instances as "one-offs" that are not "catastrophic," which has helped me be more present and not fear failure as much, or feel as if it inevitable. I hope to keep structuring that into my daily life this year so it becomes habitual.
i'm afraid of loneliness and therefore of not being liked. it has limited me because i often overreact out of fear, and it has the opposite effect (scaring people away instead of bringing them closer to me) i will work on reminding myself that it's in my head and that my friends and family DO like me and while there is work involved, i do not need to fear.
I am scared of being "too Jewish" because I am always judged for it.
Right now my biggest fear is that we're in danger of losing our democracy in the US. In fact, there seems to be a worldwide trend toward autocratic regimes - rulers rather than government by the people. And the wealth gap is growing... it's disturbing, and because it sucks my focus like a giant leach, it limits my productivity. I have to do what I can to fight it - which is an ongoing learning process. Since it will take more than me to overcome it, I have to do what I can (which I'm still trying to figure out), to facilitate "our" response.
Fear of myself. I have so many different fears all swirling around my head (mostly due to the uncertainty of everything post COVID.) I need to learn to just let things go and not let it fester. I did reach out for help during the late Spring when I was having major issues sleeping. Now that that's under control, I can better assess what I need to do next or what I need to let go of next.
I fear that trump will be re-elected. My personal fear is that now that I'm getting better able to travel that COVID will keep me from going to all the places I want to visit before I get too old or my back goes again. I fear I'll die in pain. Can I let go of these fears? I've had them (other than the prick in the WH) for so long that it's second nature. They're not all-consuming but they pop up a few times a month. Then I return to living my best for that day.
I am afraid of apocalypse. I am getting over it by living it.
Echoing my answers from 2018, I am working to overcome my fear of unworthiness stemming from being single. This fear has negatively affected many of my interpersonal relationships and their boundaries. Working with Dr. Mather I plan on continuing to better understand and master this fear.
Fear of failure/imposter syndrome. Every time another mediocre dude gets a job that I did not apply for, thinking I was not qualified, I feel rage. So, maybe this is the year that I just apply.
fear of being alone, wish I knew how to let it go
I am fearful that Bill will pass away and our financial picture and final affairs are not yet in order. I plan to overcome this by forcing him to sit down with me before the year's end...2021 January
Maybe my fear of leaving my comfort zone of my 15 year career. Just do it.
I have a fear that the people closest to me will get ill and or die. The only thing I can do is to try and spend quality time and have no regrets about my behaviour towards those I love.
I fear that with the pandemic continuing and upcoming election, that there will be even more division and lack of understanding of how to interact with and coexist with those you disagree with.
I fear that finances will continue to be a hindrance. I feel we are living beyond our means and worry that someone’s basic but expensive things are not prioritized.
Fear? The big one is the demise of our democracy. Close behind that, and within it, is the division of our people into nearly armed and warring camps, driven in large part by the growing resource inequity and the vanishing middle class. Are these rational fears? Even if they are, what can I do? I think of the theme of one of Carrie Newcomer’s songs: make things better in the three feet around you. Even as I harbor some fear, I find hope in being true to who I am, reaching out to those within my reach and treasuring the moments that are the real stuff of living.
Death. Plan. Put papers in order.
Frightened of my lack of motivation and boredom with life. Stops me doing anything of any value. I will try and break out of my malaise and move on. I don't have a plan though.
My fear of change. Anything new scares the shit out of me, even my move to London that I was so excited for. Its so easy to get used to the situation you're in, even if its not an ideal one, because well, why risk making things worse? I want to overcome this fear and challenge myself to try new things more often. Change is GOOD and sometimes its worth taking that risk, because if it works out then you'll be in a better situation than when you started.
My biggest fear is confronting my parents about how their homophobia continues to hurt me. I keep thinking I'm ready, and then I chicken out.
Ah man, I'm not good yet at asking math questions! That's literally one of the most important skills, to be able to figure out what's tripping you up and verbalize it. I kind of did this well during thesis presentations but need to do better. My classmates are good at it (especially Sidd!) but that's also pretty intimidating. I think I need to prepare questions ahead of time--I'm going to try that this Thursday. But I also just need to...practice, and keep learning more, ya know?
I am afraid that I will not have the courage to listen to my inner voice, the voice that talks in whispers. More specifically, I am afraid that if I do the bold and crazy things it asks of me, that I will be led astray and I will ruin my life and be stuck with regret. I do not know how to reconcile this. It's something I am praying and meditating on. I need all the help I can get with this.
A long-held fear that my parents don't truly love me. I will overcome it and let it go by acknowledging its fundamental truth; detaching from harmful, toxic relationships; and embracing the family who celebrates me as I am.
Being excluded, thought silly embarrassed. So?
My fear is being alone and not with the people I love or being wanted . It has stopped me from saying what I want to my husband until recently. I was able to this yr say what my needs were. It has also made me miss so much. It had helped a bit saying it to him, but I need to learn to either except or walk away or learn to keep moving forward with or without him. Haven’t figured that out yet
I have a pretty bad fear of failing. Apparently, it's a thing called "Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria" and is common in people with ADHD. To me, it sounds like something everyone suffers from at some point, but whatever. For me though, this fear stops me from doing the things I really want to do. For some reason, my brain would rather not try something and fail instead of trying something, possibly succeeding, and at the very least learning how to do better next time. But it's also no just with new things. I'm always worried my work isn't good enough, I'm going to let everyone down, people are going to laugh or make fun of me, I'll probably get fired, etc. That never happens though, no matter how sure I am that it will. This fear is holding me back from doing things and feeling successful and I'm sick of it. I just need to keep reminding myself that I can only succeed if I try and believe in the things I'm doing. Sure, I might fail sometimes, but the consequences will most likely never be as bad as I imagine they're going to be.
A fear that I have is that inside of me is actually a terrible person who, when it comes down to it, is rotten to the core. My plan to overcome this, is self talk and self-trust. I don't think I'm wicked and I don't think anybody else believes me to be wicked so maybe I'm not wicked.
I am still afraid to present myself as Jewish, in Jewish spaces and to non-Jewish people. Like, I was applying for an apartment this week and I left the prospective landlord a message and said I wouldn't be checking my phone over yontif and I had this fear that I wouldn't get the apartment if I didn't answer the phone...I'm afraid to volunteer for leadership roles in the minyan, I'm afraid to take aliyot, etc... I don't know how I'm going to practice being Jewish in the world when I hardly interact with the world now, and shul is closed, but whenever I have a chance I want to stand up for myself. Don't do business on Shabbos. Be the best Jewish mother I can be, and lead rituals confidently in the spheres I do have access to (e.g. with the minyan, kiddush at home, leading havdalah when it's my turn).
I have a fear of committed intimacy -- at baseline, a fear of being stuck in a dynamic I don't want, of having obligations put on me which I don't want. But I also desire committed intimacy, which creates a conundrum. The answer, at least for now, I think, is to be more careful with who I open up to, but to open up more fully when I choose to.
I fear that whatever love is given to me will not be enough to satisfy me, and that instead of accepting whatever I will end up with, I just give up. I am going to focus on keeping myself occupied and busy so that I don't focus so much on the lack of love and affection in my life.
I fear my own father and his fragility. He has been living in an assisted living center for over a year now with Parkinson's and dementia. His inability to speak at times terrifies me. I don't know what to do and I avoid having conversations with him because of it. I know that is terrible and it gives me so much guilt. Sometimes I am thankful I live so far away so I don't have to see his suffering. And that is selfish but I don't know how to move past it.
My fear is getting Covid-19, going into the hospital and/or spreading the virus to others. It has greatly limited me in doing much of anything. I go out once a week to shop for us and my parents, and I take my parents to doctor's appointments. That's about all I've done now for 6.5 months. I will only let it go once I know that I am safe from getting infected. The way that's looking now is another 6-9 months away.
Previous year's answer could still apply. I'm afraid of failure. I'm afriad that we came so far and it isn't right.--I feel confident and supported and loved. We are working hard for our community, for our family. All is good. I will take care of myself. I wish we could financially not worry so much. In the year to come, I will try harder to accept what is--while fighting for what is right.
Interestingly I am fearful of trying new things for my company right now - I used to be so forward thinking and creative and came up with ideas that if no one helped me I would do anyway and generally was successful - but I think too many times I have gone rogue and been called out not celebrated and today my new manager kept saying we are going rogue and it gave me a little anxiety because I know that it never helped me - but I am going to lean in and explore what we can do as a team and ask myself to put myself out there and try something new to expand and grow my territory and footprint - I think I have always been stuck in the "adoption" box and now have a territory that is only 50% adoption and if I want to grow the non adoption state I have to get really creative and take risks - knowing they all won't land but that the 1 that does may be enough!
My fear is for us, for the country, for the world. I don't think it makes sense to let go of the fear; that would be unrealistic. Rather, I hope to compartmentalize it enough so it doesn't overwhelm my every day. So I can find the joy and awe in the midst of the real fears I have for us all. And continue to do whatever work I can to Do Better for us all.
Physical fears: falling, breathing worsening I will continue my physical re-conditioning by going to maintenance classes, educating myself as my conditions change and meditating.
What other people think of me, especially those I care deeply about. Maybe I will try thinking more about what I think of me.
I have a fear that someone will break into the house and kill my family. I will trust that we are safe here.
Fear that fear will prevent me from taking the big step of just going back to Europe Won’t be allowed in Won’t have enough money Will be isolated there Plan a long term visit to get over any quarantine requirements Confirm countries I am going to will allow me in Make financial plan for period I am there Have planned interactions In-person classes and events
Same as last year. I fear never finding love and dying alone. I'm still waiting on therapy which got pushed back due to the pandemic.
My fear is that I am not enough. It shadows me every day. I push it back or ignore it, but it is always there, like a second skin. I have no idea how to overcome it.
I fear 4 more years of DT and what that will do to the country, the environment, the world. Ultimately this fear is for the human species--does "intelligent" life inevitably self-destruct (one explanation of the Fermi paradox)? Are we committed to that path? I'm not aware of this fear limiting me, as I still experience joy in day to day life, but it is a depressing idea. I don't plan on overcoming it, but I am actively working to defeat DT in the upcoming election.
kind of mentioned this above but i think i have a fear of setting goals bc of the fear of the crushingness of not being able to do them and how it just feels easier to not set them. and other fears about time and if it will always feel like everything went too fast and i didn’t do enough or do the right things or do them in the right way. one way i want to start moving past these is to start therapy! and another thing and i am already trying to start doing this but to understand that it will feel worse in the long run to not have tried than to have failed, which duh is why that cliche phrase exists, but also, it’s true. because already i know this fear has limited me — in how i have seen myself fail to set goals around the things that, when i do them, make me happy, whether that’s job apps or writing projects or sending mail to my friends or whatever else. also fear of getting old. i think the way to move past that is to be aware that this is the life we get and this is the amount of time and while it doesn’t work for me to pressure myself by saying MAKE EVERY DAY COUNT i would probably both be happier and do more things i want to do if i had a little bit better control over my time and also of what i want to do, and of fitting those together in service of each other.
I am worried by the isolation and that I am living a lot of my life online and virtually. I will try and keep my phone OFF more But it is CONNECTION and that is using WHAT THERE IS not wishing for what what isn't and losing connection
Fear of ignoring my daughter when working both in and out of the home. Worry that she is neglected when I resort to device audiobooks for her entertainment. Limits jobs to grounded singular locations only leaving no choice for exploring on my career path as a traveler. I will work on limiting device use and catching myself if overcompensating with later bedtimes, etc.
My fear that my shoulder doesn't recover fully from surgery, and if my ankle keeps getting worse. Rehab as best as I can.
I have been afraid of finally letting go of the relationship I'd been in for 11 years. I am planning to move out and start the work of moving on. I'm still scared, and so sad, but I can't build anything on a broken foundation.
Same as last year I guess. The fear that I will never make the time to get my many writing ideas and and essays out of my head, my computer, my notebooks, and into the world. I will show up to write at least once a week, and I will look into a writing class or group to help me stay on track.
I fear for our country. I fear for the safety and lives of normal Americans being targeted by this administration. I fear the lack of empathy, the war on women, the war on minorities, the continual and deliberate creation of an underclass. I fear a government that is about power and enrichment and not about improving lives. I just reread last year's answer, and I wish my answer this year could be as small as that earlier answer seems now . . .
I fear it'll all be pointless. It's so easy to say, why bother? when I don't think my choices affect anything. I just have to get up and do it anyway, without any guarantees about its efficacy.
I still have a certain apprehension about the whole scenario of driving the car. It is true that ageing has slowed down reaction times and that I sometimes get distracted during conversation. So, I can’t deny that. I do 100% acknowledge the need to pay very close attention while driving. The more one drives, the more likely that “incidents” occur. When they do, Anne’s reactions are, I believe, being augmented by her long-term view of my health. On occasions, I sense her tensing in the car, anticipating that I am creating danger for us (this in addition to externally-sourced dangers). In my view, this is at a level far higher than warranted. But my father thought the same thing when he was self-medicating. It was definitely warranted. Any incident where I actually am undeniably at fault just feeds and ratifies her anxiety and tends to justify such reactions into the future. Temperaments come into it, too. We both find security in control, so it’s not surprising that when she doesn’t have control (i.e., not driving), she might react more strongly. From her perspective, she’s totally justified in being scared. If this doesn’t stop, I may need to relinquish daytime driving to her in order to assist with this. Such a measure would (unreasonably) strike at the core of one’s masculinity (which has already taken a beating by unemployment and the vicissitudes of ageing) but it may be one of those sacrifices I need to make for the sake of her quietude. Meanwhile, the number of such incidents is now vastly reduced by Anne now having her own car, with which there arise no such occasions. Due to COVID, we’ve not travelled by car together very much at all. This doesn’t solve the issue – but the fewer of these events, the happier I am in the short-term, as (one presumes) is she. I do know that I am also consciously taking far more care now, since I first recognised and acknowledged the problem.
A fear that I don't matter, that I don't rank as important, that I am not enough as I am. I hope therapy will help.
My biggest fear has been tied to work and my shortcomings in regards to it. Right now, I have a fulfilling job as a paraprofessional educator, but wish to become a tenured teacher again. Struggling through a divorce and other emotional difficulties has made it difficult to get the job I want. My goal is to start applying early and persistently pursuing positions until it happens.
I was able to overcome a fear I had this year without even realizing it. I was scared to go get diagnosed with autism, because what if it wasn't true? What if I just can't cope with life and this is how everyone feels? But I'm so glad I did it. This year, I think it's social interaction. I'm scared to be out there and be myself. I think my diagnosis helps, because I know it's real and I can work past it. I want to try to go to some social events, some game nights, etc. I think that the fear that joy will be taken away has kept me from enjoying things in life. I've worked on that this year, but I'd like to continue to do that this year. I want to be present in the moment and question my feelings of anxiety to see if it's true social anxiety or if I'm just scared that I won't be able to maintain or that it will all be taken away. I want to be braver and stronger and I want to be me.
Same fears as many of the years previous -- there's a fear of allowing my full self to be seen and accepted by people. I'm in the midst of learning who all the hurt parts of myself are and where they live in my psyche, so it's taking time but I'm learning new ways of seeing and responding to things that activate those parts. My fears limit my ability to move forward unapologetically in my life and to have the kinds of relationships that I truly want. Sticking with therapy and taking chances with my vulnerability seem to be the ways to overcome this, though I don't think it'll be magically solved by this time next year.
This seems to be a recurring theme every year but the fear of not finding that man I can see a future with and start to settle down. People are all at different life stages now which is quite hard sometime but once again I have to remember that my time will come and I need to learn to be okay with that and the unknown of the what the future holds.
I am afraid of making calls. Cold calling especially, but generally making calls. I think I've been getting better about it, but still, it's a problem. I hope to build on the successes that I've had in overcoming this in the past few years, and initiate more conversations.
That I cannot do a doctorate. I've avoided thinking about it, mostly. I have to either be ok with not doing it, or find a way to make it happen.
I fear being alone when I am older and not working. Part of the desire to building a base is building the connections and friendships that will last into old age and exist outside of today's daily grind. It is part of why I struggle to pick my base, there are so many parts of my life and ambitions and expectations riding on not making a mistake in the selection
I have a fear of being alone -- not in terms of how I spend my time, but as a general state of being in life. I haven't been in a long-term relationship in a number of years and clearly I am still alive, and in some ways thriving (in other ways, not), but I am plagued with sadness and anxiety about possibly never being in a long-term relationship and having someone to share my life with again. I've been trying to invest time and energy and thought in filling my life with enough other things that this absence becomes negligible or even unnoticeable, but it's definitely a work in progress. It's hard not to do these things for their own sake, but also with a secret hope that through them I'll meet my next partner.
I fear that I'm not good enough. This has lead to not as good job applications and CV's. Being held down by not moving forward, and feeling badly about myself. I want to work on figuring out who I am and what I want - and quieting the negative voice.
Fear of living and learning which has always taken different forms; fear of success; fear of fulfilling myself in ways that have nothing to do with my child or work.
Heights. Staying on the ground.
Perfectionism is always a fear of mine. It stops me dead in my tracks. I am working on creating habits that will allow me to move past my mental weaknesses and be the person I really am meant to be.
Upsetting other people, losing security. I have tamped myself down to meet the status quo. I plan on working against that mindset and letting others be in charge of their own emotions.
I have underlying fears that things will go terribly wrong - for loved ones, causes I'm committed to or me. I will pursue letting go by: 1) Being open about them (hiding and shame feed them) 2) Seeking good influences - reading and listening to wise resources (I have a stack of books already and know of good radio /podcasts); creating down time, exploring meditating; keeping fitness, good rest and healthy eating in my life, being in nature; being close with friends and family; appreciating creativity and the arts. 3) Being in action in the areas where I have fears. Action takes away fear's power
A fear of when I'm older living not being able to care for myself.
I am very scared of being lied to. It has made me less trusting and definitely caused some issues at the beginning of my relationship. I am learning to trust all over again. It is a long process. I'm almost a year into dating my partner and sometimes I still feel like he might lie to me... which he never has and he is always very honest with me. I need to just take the leap and trust. I'm not sure if there is another way to learn to trust again.
I fear that they will come for me and kill all my friends. I fear that the pandemic will kill my beloved and my family and friends. I fear the scorched earth and harrowing future of becoming elderly in a time of destruction.
I'm afraid that I'll never be as successful as I've dreamed of being. It has limited me by making me avoid failure, holding onto a mediocre status quo and thereby ensuring the thing I fear. This year I'm taking a big leap into a new project that could be wildly successful or could force me to see that there are possibilities everywhere.
My longest-running fear is the fear of rejection. If I talk too long, I may be rejected. If my opinion differs greatly from yours, I might be rejected. If I say the wrong thing, I risk rejection. It has become too much. It limits my behavior, it limits my ability to be free, to feel comfortable in my skin, to be heard. Too much self-imposed limitation. I plan to overcome it by paying close attention to that feeling of stopping myself, and instead of heeding it, assessing myself and the situation and going ahead with what I want to say. This ties in well to being vulnerable, I realize - woohoo- two for one! I think the awareness of this alone is a start to seeing this pattern and then working on breaking it. Similar to taking a meditative pause, being aware of the feeling I get when I think I need to stop and censor myself, and then allowing myself to continue instead of stop, will help me break this long standing pattern based on fear.
Fear of not being capable, worthy and good enough. It has limited in many ways, most of all professionally, leaving me stuck in a never progressing, always procrastinating state of being for a very long time. I plan on letting it go by facing my conditioning and my attachment to the fear. By meditating through stillness and the grace of God I am able to forgive myself and have compassion for my limitations but rising above them with intention and strength. I will overcome it by taking a leap of faith, every single day– By feeding from my inner courage and by detaching from my limiting beliefs I am able to stop playing small and see myself as more than just a human being: but a beautiful, magical, wise, loving and worthy starseed with a purpose in this lifetime to fulfill. I will work on embodying my higher self every day, to honor myself, my soul's purpose and to honor God.
I fear a devastating injury or illness that will cause me to suffer more than I already do from being alive. I often think to myself that if I got a cancer diagnosis, I would refuse treatment and let the disease take me as swiftly as possible, but I recognize that might be an unhealthy thought. Life includes a lot of suffering; my fear is getting a big dose of more of it. Therefore I also fear my wife's death or the death of my second child. I fear that my daughter will never reconcile with me. I don't fully understand why she has stopped speaking to me so it is hard for me to envision how this will get better. I do hope we can have had family counseling by next year, and that it's productive. I also fear wasting my life, not finding nor fulfulling my life's purpose. This seems absurd to hold as a concern when I am 54; surely if I had a life's purpose I've fulfilled it already. But I don't feel that way. I feel it took me until recently to mature into full adulthood, accept that suffering is part of all lives, see how much control we have over how we respond to whatever is happening to us, embrace love as a verb and devote myself to my marriage.
That I am going to die soon, from ALS. I plan on preparing for death, planning my funeral and so on, and living each day one day at a time, and make it to the world gathering in August 2021.
I fear not being well-remembered by my family and not making much of a difference in the world.
I am somewhat afraid that I don't have the skill, brains or stamina to be successful in my job. I also don't want to fizzle out on my last career position. Is that holding me back? I need to keep thinking bigger picture, and think what would someone do who would be successful? I don't feel like I have a role model so that's tricky. What will it take? How can I be that person?
I fear that our democracy will crumble, which has limited me on some days to feel optimistic. I fear that I don’t know what I’m talking about when I recommend therapy or talk about mental health or weight; issues that I feel like affect me but in fact don’t. I fear I am worse at my job than my more productive type A friends, because I don’t have the same shame about perfectionism that they do. I plan to let it go by pressing on with my relative optimism, surrounding myself with people who love me and whom I love, and acknowledging when I don’t know answers and not getting defensive when people do things better or more thoroughly than I would have done.
A fear I have is committing to selling Filipino food rather than inviting friends over. There's so much positive validation and support from my friends to just go for it. I think I'm scared that it'll take too much time away from my other commitments - climbing, backpacking, road tripping and lazying around. I think I just need to start small. Set a small goal to gauge interest and go from there. I have so many people to lean on for advice - Faith, Chloe and others. I just have to give it a shot.
I have fear about my relationship with my son. I fear that he doesn't truly love me, that he tolerates me. I am insecure in this relationship and it causes me to worry unnecessarily and I believe, behave in ways that aren't as relaxed and positive as they could be if I were more secure in the relationship - or possibly, just adjust my expectations. I may never really receive all I would like, and I need to let go of expectations, live in the present and just relax.
My fear is that the world is unfixable and that I will be part of what stops it from healing. It holds me back because it stops me from imagining solutions and what they could actually be. I plan on letting it go by dreaming big and allowing myself to be inspired. I can find a balance between healthy skepticism and expansive vision.
I sometimes don’t believe I will find the man for me. I start looking at everyone and comparing my life. I stop believing and thinking that there are still good people out there just like me. This also applies to men. I need to stop this limiting belief about no great men out there.
I have absolutely no intentions of trying to overcome or let go of any of my fears this year. Indeed, I shall embrace them like the humans I can never embrace again. There's no point in trying to work on say, getting another job or embracing going outdoors like everything's fine again. I need to be afraid in order to keep myself safe, literally. I need to live in a high state of paranoia and fear and now is not the time to relax and let it go.
I still fear of failure... I fear failing my wife, my kids, my company... I struggle a lot with avoiding disappointing others, but I know in the end, it is only me who I need to satisfy... I am way too demanding on myself.
I was never prone to panic attacks until Covid-19 and I found myself not wanting to go outside, not interact with other people. But with the help of my husband I am able to work through it and get back to enjoying life.
I am terrified that I'll die in the pandemic. I am terrified that my parents will die in the pandemic. What I can do is test and make smart choices and encourage others to do the same.
I think I'm really scared for what's next after this job and what's in store for me for the future. I plan to do some more thinking about it and allow myself to live more in the moment.
Helping myself. I know I'm struggling physically, emotionally, mentally, but I am too scared to reach out for help and shake things up. I honestly rather suffer and just try to bounce along in life and not inconvenience myself or deal with the fallout of needing accommodations or hospitalizations or medication or anything.
I'm afraid my country won't survive. I don't think this is something I can really let go of or overcome in the next year... more like, confront/react to/deal with. I don't have an easy way to move to another country long-term and I really don't want to. I like my city and my community and my neighborhood, and we bought this house with the intention of staying put. I think the main way I will address this fear is spending more time addressing systemic inequities, actually going to protests when COVID-19 is less of a concern, continuing to work for unionization, etc.
I think that I have feared being gone from home too long, missing time with my dogs and the farm and sometimes my partner. But I would also like to return to more of the adventure that I once had. I think I need to make some plans. Once it's on the calendar, I will figure it out.
Tremendous fear of the election outcome. Even the outcome I am attached to, could result in social unrest afterward. There doesn't seem to be a peaceful, positive way forward for our country on Nov. 4th. I'm overcoming that fear by writing postcards to voters, by dropping lit for Dems, by donating weekly to a bunch of campaigns, by keeping my yard signs out, by ... just trying. Perhaps we relocate in 2021. It's hard to imagine.
Fear of losing love -- I am always afraid that when someone is angry with me, it will be permanent. That fear keeps me from making decisions that I think are right -- either for myself in family situations, or for my patients at work. I plan to work on stepping back and recognizing when I get into this dilemma, rather than making potentially impactful decisions on the spur of the moment.
My fear is that we, as a nation, are on a downward spiral toward a backward time of ignorance. I am hopeful that I am mistaken and the coming elections will stop this in its tracks. Should my fears come to fruition I will look into political asylum as I feel I cannot continue to live under the hypocrisy and degradation that is Trump.
I fear no being a good enough therapist and inadvertently harming my clients. I’m studying to improve myself.
I owe a lot this answer to Sonya Renee Taylor's insights in "The Body is not an Apology." I'm afraid of being disabled. Despite considerable effort to stamp out my implicit bias against myself, I feel anger and resentment of how poorly I hear. The constant ringing I hear in my brain could just as well be the constant fear of other's judging my abilities to work. I'm in pain often because I deeply desire the human connection that comes from conversation. My fear has limited me because I reflexively try to hide it even when it might help to share instead. My fear limits my desire and ability to pursue my long-held goals in life that will bring good to the world. My fear causes real physical and emotional damage to myself from disliking what my body isn't capable of; and ignoring or discounting the many things my body and mind are capable of doing. My fear actually supports and contributes to a cultural view of supremacy of the able bodied, the light skinned, the men, the rich, the cis-gendered, and the heterosexual. I plan on letting it go by practicing disclosure of my hearing loss. By asking for help while contributing to teamwork. By practicing radical self-love. By saying my mantra: I hear perfectly with my heart and my mind.
I have a fear of passing on my co-dependency to Lilia and Riley. I am working to recognize my patterns and behavior, name it and discuss with the girls. Lilia is very resistant to this type of communication though so also just working to respect her boundaries, teaches her that they deserve to be respected. I need to just keep working the steps. It's been just over a year that I have been unemployed and I definitely still have some fear about my ability to step into a new role. My concerns are two-fold: I worry about what I can bring to a position (fear of not being good enough) and I worry about falling into my co-dependent patterns and give too much to prove myself and my worth, to myself and to others. Same answer: just keep working the steps.
I worry that my fiance and I will be roommates. I have lost my sex drive and he doesn't have a big one. Sex and feeling good in my body has been such an important part of my identity. I think I can overcome it by taking care of myself, and if we go to therapy. Including him on his own. He's got all these privacy hang ups, and is better at sex with alcohol inhibitors. And me - I just don't feel strong in my body. Or sexy. Or externally validated enough. That colonized mind.
Yes fear is a problem with me, especially when living in solitude. When I am with others I have less fear, but being alone, fear wins most of the time, or at least slows me up. Need to solve this problem.
I fear people with privilege will continue sleeping and liberation will never come. I fear black people and all "none-white" people will never feel safe. I fear all this work has no point.
I think I am afraid of getting frail-not getting old, but getting frail, and losing my independence. I'm taking a course right now, Aging as a Spiritual Discipline, in an attempt to let it all go.
I'm so afraid of not being or doing enough. And that's so limiting, because any energy I spend thinking about not being enough is energy I could spend being me and doing the things I care about - creating art, cooking food, cleaning my house (I mean okay I do not really care about that clearly), being a conscientious colleague, reading books and articles and thinking about what they mean, going outside and enjoying the natural world, and enjoying the people in my life. I'm hoping to work harder on trusting myself and not bullying myself. I particularly should let go of my conviction that I can't complete complex projects or maintain things.
My only remaining fear is that I will never get to writing the books and articles and music that I have cooking up inside of me. COVID re-awoke my awareness of life's finite nature.
I know I have fears, and I know they get in my way, but right at this moment, I can't recall a single one. However, I'm staring at a wasp a foot away from my face and feeling pretty fearful. How do I get this dang thing out of my car?
This year I feel less fear than last, and I think that's in part because I really did look at my fear of cancer recurrence and death from cancer, often and directly. I still have this fear and I guess I probably always will, until it comes true or I die of something else. This year I think that I have a subtle new fear beneath the fear from last year and its lingering hangover. I fear losing my fear. I want to feel this fear, which is entirely realistic and logical. I don't want to let it go and slide into a false state of thinking I'm well past any risk or danger. Maybe what I am saying is that I want to hold on to the benefits of facing this newly crystalized fear of my mortality and my possible suffering (and Val's) on the way to letting go and being at peace with whatever happens, whenever it happens. And the only way through to that place is to live and be here, now. Fully present, full of gratitude and awareness.
I have a fear of not being the frum person (even externally) that my wife and now both extended families think I am. I am too honest to live a lie. I fear that i won't be able to keep external frumness from not being overridden by my true, not frum status. I don't have any strategy for dealing with this other than maybe I'll eventually just embrace it completely with all the knowledge I have of its non-realness or that ill have no issue living what I termed a colossal lie.
Related to question 7, expressing my desires and fearing what people will think of me or how that will affect my relationships. But what's a life worth living if you can't even speak up for what you want? I plan on making a promise to myself that if I'm thinking of wanting something, I'll express it verbally. It's a muscle I need to build.
Fear of settling. I've gone through so much shit I find myself being grateful for the calm I'm currently experiencing, but am I also fulfilled enough? I think to work on this I can express my inner feelings and desires more to the people around me. It's probably in my power to manifest what I want in life AND feel safe, secure, and content at the same time.
Fear of Trump being re-elected! It hasn't limited me at all, it has energized me. I am working to get Biden elected. If Trump wins, I am already planning my exit strategy. My family plans to leave the U.S.
I fear I will lose it all. I've lost so much, but gain along the way as well. It feels like everything can just crumble. While this is a possibility, all I can do is my best to keep things going and take it all as it comes.
I'm afraid of needles, but I am a universal blood donor. I want to donate more in the coming year. I just need to suck it up and do it. Maybe look into breathing methods that help with fear of needles.
I feel trapped. I moved from a place that I loved to a place that is "just okay" for me. The move was because my wife wanted to move. I should have put up a fight to stay put for a while (I was retiring and needed to transition and my wife would probably be able to make some significant changes in her life) but I went along. Now I am stuck in a town I dislike for many reasons (it is a perficly nice place for my wife, but not for me. I know I cannot go back "home" for financial reasons so I am stuck. I don't know how to let go or overcome my sadness. As I said last year, I just get smaller and sadder the longer I stay here.
My fear not leaving the place I am, and going to the place where i can respect myself and feel more respected by those around me.
The fear that I will screw "it" up. Of course doing nothing as a result of that fear will definitely screw "it" up. I'm working on being more decisive. "Fight Delayed Decision and Incomplete Action".
Following the most recent wildfires in and around the Bay Area and the many days of staying indoors to avoid inhaling smokey air, I am finding myself increasingly fearful of the effects of climate change on Northern California (and the rest of the world). I find the possibility of annual wildfires in this region to be scary and destabilizing. I worry that the time will come when our local parks will burn. Our family, friends and neighbors could be evacuated. We could lose our homes. We will continue to take as many precautions as we can. We will encourage others to do so too. In the meantime, I am hopeful that my efforts to cultivate equanimity will help me work through these fears and continue to stay optimistic despite this scary new reality.
is Alex the right long-term partner for me, regardless of the fact that we will (Gd-willing) share a child together? Do I need my partner to be Jewish? if Alex is not, am I destined to be alone forever? am I expecting to much of a partner and connection? is my desire for multiple forms of connection totally futile to be met by one person (husband) or are we meant to seek multiple forms of fulfillment (within socially acceptable means)? I don't know that I can let go of this - I think my answer to it will continue to be explored and evolve.
Not exactly a fear, but I realize I have anxiety over a few things. Cleaning, calling/emailing someone I've been putting off, starting something after I've procrastinated for so long, talking to acquaintances (not afraid of talking to strangers or friends, interestingly). I've been trying to "make that call" sooner to reduce procrastination time. I know I'll never stop procrastinating, but at least I can cut down the delay.
Globally: I have a fear that our systems are too deeply intertwined and effective to be dismantled. I fear that BIPOC will continue to have to fear for their lives everyday. I fear that a small percentage of wealthy white people will continue to reap the benefits of a harmful and exploitative system. I fear that we will not take the steps we need to slow global warming and we will see more and more evidence of climate change and those that will suffer the most are the people who have the least impact on harming the environment. Personally: It feels so silly to even have my own fears when I am so privileged. If I am being honest, I do think I have a fear of being alone. Being in relationship is something that I took for granted when I was younger and I didnt expect to be single in my late 30's but it is what it is. I have confidence that I will find someone who is right for me and these things cannot be rushed or pressured.
I have a fear of embarrassing myself and not impressing other people (not living up to my perfectionist ideals). I'm starting therapy to address my anxiety.
Fear of putting myself out there, with pitching articles and talks. Fear of stepping into the growth zone when I've been content in the comfort zone. I plan on continuing spending time with motivated people, and carrying out powerball sessions, and trying to take in suggestions from others and study courses and make a vision board that can help me achieve my goals.
So hard. I fear the thinking of my fellow Americans and have little patience for the why of it. I want to work to mend this rift but have a hard line on protecting my loved ones. I will prepare to keep my community as safe and self reliant as possible
I'm afraid of failure. Let's start there...there are many more. I think I need to let it go now. I've been very successful in my life, much to show for it, and the only thing that holds me back from greater success is more belief in myself and trust in others.
I used to fear not being seen as universally adaptable. As in, I wanted to be liked by people I didn't even like. I wanted to be the exception - say, that one liberal that conservatives could talk to and feel heard. But I cannot do that anymore. To be quiet or calm in these times feels like feeding the monster. It feels like lying.
Interestingly, the financial issues that were troubling me last year have not been as much of a problem this year. Most people’s finances took a hit from COVID, but my lack of commuting, no gym membership, no trainer, etc. have actually helped. I also got a good tax return for the first time in my life, and that helped greatly. My fear, however, still relates to possibly not having a job after the end of the Spring semester. I do have supplemental income through my other job, but that would not be enough to help support my family, especially with a second kid about to arrive. Not much to do about it but keep applying for jobs, but I might try to see if I can do another one year contract with Lafayette given not a lot of universities have job openings given the current economic climate.
I’m afraid people will find out who I really am. But I am who I am and I need to be that person — maybe a bit kinder, gentler, nicer. I’m going to own my “me”-ness, and stop apologizing for being intelligent.
Pot causes distance from some friends that I'd like to be closer to. Elon Musk is developing an implant that will stop addiction! It will be more than a year tho.
A fear of the wrath of certain colleagues. But their problem with me is their problem, so I need to get over it.
I fear that losing my physical appearance as relevant commerce has made me irrelevant in general. It has held me back from being confident and feeling worthy in the world. I fear losing the places of comfort to a reality I don't yet see. How to let go or overcome? Accept what is and have faith in what will be.
This is an excellent question, because my worst fear came to pass. My son died of an accidental overdose. I worried all those years, with him in and out of treatment, every time he didn't answer a text, or was hard to find...I feared he would be gone. Now he is. And I'm still here. My world has been knocked sideways. And I'm still here. I keep moving, getting up, going to work, coming home - and I'm still here. I will use this to help others, once I'm in a place to do so.
I am scared I won't have everything I want in life. I plan on letting it go remember I can have it all if I work for it and accept that it's okay to have the desires I have. And by remembering that often, the things I want will change drastically. Things I think are important now may not be in the next chapter of my life. I'm curious where I will be at in September 2021
Fear of being seen for who I really am. I hide, I silence myself, I play small. I am getting over my fear of what people think of me, and learning to show up fully as myself. Continue to be brave and courageous in the face of the fear.
Fear of dealing with Frank,. More journaling will help and just feeling more solid in my decisions regarding Mom
I'm afraid of my own limitations and the bottom-line "realities" of my abilities. This isn't a fear like crowds or heights or intimacy - but I fear that deep down, I have an inflexible sense of what I can and can't achieve, what's possible, what I have within my power. What I mean is that I carry around a pretty low, limited vision of myself - that I may have *moments*, but I'm not particularly bright or all that capable - that I'm bland, obvious, literal, forgetful, impractical, obnoxious. It doesn't matter how much evidence to the contrary there is -- part of the reason this even occurs to me is how often I'm continually shocked and suspicious when accomplished, attractive or otherwise big-deal people treat me as worthy of their affection or friendship or whatever - don't they know I'm just pretending? I think I'm unable to really live a fully realized, creative and fulfilled life because I carry around this idea that I'm really not all that capable or worthy. I'd like to first of all work on letting go of old, worn-out and painful ideas about "success" -- some of what this is about is the feeling that I'd be capable of MORE success if I just BELIEVED in myself more. Let's move the goalposts on "success" - which I've always felt meant recognition and ego biscuits and money but which I genuinely believe is more honestly defined around things like help, growth, kindness and creative productivity. And at the same time, maybe take a harder look at those old scripts (from my absent, deprioritizing parents and my resentful, critical ex) that instilled a version of me that was LESSER THAN. Hold tenderness for others, stay open and curious and make stuff that moves me forward toward my farthest-flung dreams....
Rejoining community. Like so many others in lock down, it is hard to know when and how to come out of the house and reconnect in person with family and friends and do things like go to a museum and a restaurant. For me, the challenge is greater, as my partner has such a great fear of the virus that everything we do is how to manage his fear. I plan on supporting his mental health and stability, try to help him realize when we can relax...even a bit. And understand that his anger comes from fear...it can be hard, I can't control his emotions, but I can control mine. I will take baby steps to resume life in public, bringing my partner along slowly.
After I spent the 2008 recession isolated in a remote part of Los Angeles, poor, without a vehicle, with no romance, and with my friends unwilling to travel to visit me, I developed a fear of being alone. The limitation became misanthropy; the longer I remained lonely, the more I hated humankind. Over time, I found the value in being alone, and I grew to love everyone again, which inevitably led to my finding romance. I understand why involuntary celibates can be so angry and hateful. But the solution is within them. Now I accept my alone times, and try to be productive, and my partner doesn't need to feel smothered by me. Covid isolation is doing a number on everyone, and I empathize with those who are lonely and feeling hopeless. Find little ways to pamper yourself. You have to take yourself out on a date once in awhile. Trust me, it helps, and it gets better.
Fear of feeling trapped in New Zealand. It's been somewhat paralyzing. I'm trying to overcome it though EMDR-based therapy.
Fear of failure- 100%! I used to be scared to try because I thought what if I couldn’t succeed, now it’s more of I’m scared to let myself care or feel so I don’t end up disappointing or hurting myself. It’s caused me to feel callous- I am stunted by the fear of the negative that I’m limiting myself from all the positives. I want to be mindful and redirect my thoughts to seeing failure as not a mishap but a guidance to something better and a lesson to help get me there.
I fear not being accepted - not being liked - not being good enough. This fear constantly controls my actions, my thoughts, how I relate to others and myself, my ability to take up space in the world just as I am. I don't know how to let it go, but its a major goal I'd like to work on. Letting it go so I can live freer, happier, lighter.
Still no fears! Yay!
Fear of success. Fear of hard work. Fear of not liking a choice i make and being ashamed to admit it. Fear of shame. Fear of not belonging. By belonging to myself first and foremost, by understanding the fear of hard work or dislike of a part of a chosen path is not my own fear, it was planted there. Exploring all the places where i hold shame.
I am afraid of becoming a stereotypical mom: pudgy, constantly stressed, and absolutely in love with my daughter but a bit distant from my husband. To be fair with myself, though, much of this is happening because we're in a freaking pandemic. I was more fit, less anxious, and happier in my marriage when we were all able to BE OUT IN THE WORLD.
My biggest fear is that it’s already too late to make a difference here. If so I don’t know where we go / what we do. I don’t really plan to overcome it.
I am tired of feeling a better life is just of reach. I seem to be second in line always, like I am subpar. Jobs going to someone else, a guy I might be interested in actually playing me. I am working on being better at letting negativity go and not listening to the internal voices. I used to be better at that because I felt I had purpose in work.
I have held a fear of being separated from friends and people I love very tightly for a long time but I just let it go as we decided to move away from NYC.
I would like to overcome a feeling of uselessness. I don’t know how I’m going to do that because just thinking about it makes me cry but I’m gonna work on it.
That I will never find romance and excitement in falling in love with someone again. It wasn't easy as it were but with Corona it became close to impossible for me. Frankly, I have no idea how to overcome it other than falling in love again.
COVID, of course, has limited our travel and our contact with friends and family. I can’t let go or overcome it until we are all safe again. I also fear the future of our country and world. This isn’t something I can let go of or overcome, so I seek to understand what I can.
I consistently fear that I am not educated enough. I would like to take more classes and slowly get my undergrad (about 1.5 years left) but at 64 I feel it is too late. I wish I could stop watching the news and read more but I am addicted to the news and consumed with fear with 45 being our president.
I fear being judged and interrogated about my opinions. Usually leads to me being unhappy about some outcome. And the fear leaves me unable to articulate my reasoning. I simply need to stop caring if people don't like what I have to say. Take a deep breath and let it roll off.
I fear I am not good enough. This makes me defensive and work too hard. I can work to overcome this by lowering my expectations of myself around work, house cleaning, and imagined pressures from others. I can lower my expectations around shoulds, and increase my expectations around wants and self-care.
Same as last year: Being alone and lonely and dying alone and having no one to take care of me if I get sick or have to go in a nursing home. Not having a dependable car. Not having anyone to help me do anything. Not having enough finances to visit my son or take my dogs to the vet or to pay to have yard work done or to have things worked on or replaced in my home. Who will take care of my dogs if I have to go to the hospital or to a nursing home or to heaven. My son getting in trouble again or worse. My grandson Kevin dying of aids. My daughter-in-law staying on the same destructive path she is on and my grandson Cody continuing drinking. All four of them not turning to God. The only thing I know to do about any of these things is to trust God and take one day at a time and face each new day and what it brings as it happens. Worrying about it will change nothing and will only make me nervous and sick. Greater is God who is in me than satan who is in the world. God will fight my battles. God will make a way where there seemeth no way. God will take what Satan intended for my harm and turn it into something good for me. When the enemy comes in like a flood God will raise up a standard against him/them. God has not given me the Spirit if fear but of power and love and a sound mind. GOD TOOK CARE OF ALL THESE CONCERNS AND MIRE IN THE PAST YEAR ABD I HAVE NO FOUBT HE WILL DO SO IN THE FOLLOWING YEAR. I TRULY BELIEVE THIS WILL BE THE YEAR I HAVE RETURNED ABD RESTORED TO ME WHAT THE CANCRE WORM HAS TAKEN FROM ME AND HAS DESTROYED IN MY LIFE. I BELIEVE THUS US THE YEAR I WILL LISE THUS EXCESS WEIGHT AND BECOME MIRE HEALTHY; I BELIEVE THIS IS THE YEAR I WILL GET A GODLY, COMPATIBLE COMPANION/HUSBAND.; I BELIEVE THUS US THE YEAR MY FINANCES WILL GREATLY IMPROVE AND I WILL BE ABLE TO GET A GOOD CAR AND VISIT MY SON AND OTHER PEOPLE AS WELL; I BELIEVE THIS IS THE YEAR THAT MY OTHER NEEDS AND DESIRES WILL COME TO BE. AMEN AND AMEN!
It feels like I'm scared of everything. I am scared of violence, hunger, poverty and enslavement. I have to learn how to cope with this.
I don’t know what the fear in it would be so maybe it is just limiting, but I’ve noticed how other people’s beliefs, experiences and self-expression have opened me up to look at some of my ideas, thoughts and beliefs. This has really enriched my life as I look forward to these moments with others to broaden my viewpoint.
I've always felt the fear of the unknown. Living through a pandemic has held a lot of the unknown and I've learned that I can't control what's outside of my control. I can control my thoughts and actions only.
I have a fear that my kids will look back on their childhoods with some amount of hurt or feeling like they were not seen or supported the way they needed. Society tells us that children of divorce in general have worse outcomes. I think they have the support they need in order to transition to children of divorce without significant trauma but am fearful that won't be their experience. I'm doing my best to be authentic and honest with the way I'm living my life and continue to do what I think is best for myself and for them.
I fear that I am not good enough - that I am lacking. It holds me back from trying and putting myself out there. I think I have been working on it, and this unplanned pregnancy in the midst of the pandemic has been the biggest challenge for me to rise up to. But I think I’m doing alright.
Getting old. Won't have the strength and agility to do the physical work of gardening that I love. Brain working more slowly. Hard to retrieve words sometimes. One vocal chord not working and I love to sing. Izzi is getting old, too. I will miss her so much when she dies. Her lump is getting so big. Body and brain -- eat well, exercise, stay upbeat. Izz -- spend time with her now, while we still have her to snuggle. Also very worried about Trump -- what he will do if he wins or if he doesn't. I can address that be writing more letters and mailing the ones I have on the appointed day.
Financial uncertainty has been looming over me since I lost my job in January of 2020. I've been working with a financial advisor and I feel we'll have a plan that will help me overcome my concerns.
My deepest fear is when I contemplate how little time I actually have left in my life...and how many things I have left undone...and that I may no longer have all the capabilities to do those things that I may have once had. The most viable solution should be valuing each hour, each moment enough so that I can project and plan / divide and conquer.
I can’t think of any.
I'm so afraid I'll regret the decisions I've made, the choices I'm making. I'm terrified that this isn't the path to happiness, but at the same time, I cannot stay on the path I've been on for the last 20 years. I just can't I'm hoping to emerge from this mess stronger, more self assured and ready to be more fully myself (with clear boundaries and a new sense of independence).
i think i am more afraid of meeting new people than i care to admit. i prefer small gatherings vs large, and because of this i have not been out much, not met many new people. thus not getting me closer to my goal of making new friends and finding a romantic partner.
I have this irrational fear of not being good enough. Not getting it right. I've been doing inner work to learn to let go of this fear, for good. I am always good enough. I can always try and even if I fail, I can pick myself up and try again until I don't fail.
I have a lifelong fear of being killed for being Jewish. I will continue to meet that. I also fear for my black son-in-love. I want him to know more of my love and acceptance.
I have a fear of feeling my emotions. I'm working on with therapy, meditation, and honestly doing things that scare me.
I fear that other people won't like me. It has held me back. I need to let go of it. The first step is becoming aware of it. Bringing it in and embracing this side of myself. Becoming curious about it. Once I truly realize that it no longer serves me and is holding me back, I can release it.
I fear conflict. I can see that is not always good for my relationship and allows resentment to simmer. I hope to make small steps to risk conflict in order to be true to myself and honest with my life partner.
My anxiety has limited me for most of my life. Since the quarantine, I have had incredible success with using the Calm app to meditate every night. I also have this gratitude practice that we do as a family every night. I need to stick with that and maybe even intensify it some. It has helped me so much and I can only get more benefit from doing it more.
A fear is that the pandemic will reach a new high during the flu season, that people will continue to place themselves in situations that will spread the virus. The opening of bars, gyms, etc., for the sake of the economy versus the sake of human lives is going to put another wave of the pandemic and most likely it will hit harder then the first wave. I will continue to be mindful of situations and least exposure the better.
I have been afraid of being a permanent secondary partner, and dislike that term for what it implies: lowered priority. I want to let that go, and accept my relationships where they are.
oooooof... all of these are connected. My biggest fear is not being able to get rid of fear. Ha! My fears: -Being alone, irrelevant, not mattering to others -Lacking self awareness - and as a result - not being a good person and doing harm to others -Wasting time by not having a strong sense of self. Responding to the world as a victim instead of making an impact.
A fear of losing things. Whether it be possessions, or people from my life. I spent a lot of time worrying about how I could try and stop myself from losing things, but one day I will die and I will lose everything by default. So I just need to accept this and try and proceed with my life without worrying so much about how I could lose something and letting it limit me.
I have a fear of heights and of fast downhill speed. This has limited me in my job at Disney when I needed to climb tall scaffolding, or when my friends want to go biking or skiing. By focusing on my breathing in these moments and continuing to challenge myself, I can overcome these fears. I need to understand that I’m not in danger, only that my fear of uncomfortable feelings gets me in the way of doing something.
That I will lose my job and be unemployed. Working on it.
Public speaking. I don’t know if I can overcome it. Maybe mindfulness and practice
I think I have a healthy fear of returning to depression. Others consider it PTSD. It becomes PTSD when I see symptoms from so many years ago and I kind of freak. It's been a while since that has happened, but the fear is always there. I'm getting better at catching anxiety and taking baby-xanax when I need it. I don't want to overcome this fear.
Getting COVID because if exposure to students and then taking it home to a family member who might be vulnerable.
Same as last year.
I fear not feeling connected. It takes so much to keep putting one foot in front of the other that I worry I am missing feeling a part of a bigger picture. All of the daily things seem like they need to completed, but I'm not sure why or to what end. I miss having a significant other with whom I share my life and the day to day. I am lucky to have so many co-workers, friends, and family that are supportive of me in ways I never could grasp. This has been overwhelmingly evident during my job transition. I hope this time next year I'll have a found a way to keep my current co-workers in my life and to genuinely be connecting with them.
That people don't like me. I don't even like most people, why do I care if they like me?
I am a very fearless person, I move forward regardless of things that hold others back. I suppose my only fear is getting my travel business back up & running after it being devastated this year.
A fear I have is directly related to my BPD. It's the fear of abandonment. I'm working through that with as part of a DBT program and regular counselling for my BPD. I have a hard time believing people really care for me and that I'm of value in their lives. I'm speaking mainly of family and friends. Part of me knows it's not true and I'm striving to strengthen that part through tools like - Wise Mind, Middle Path, and Check the Facts. I have great hope :)
A fear of public speaking. It's limited my ability to lead, which at this stage of life, I see I need to do more of. I plan to join Toastmasters.
To be absolutely honest, I'm not sure I'm afraid of anything right now. Sure I have some doubts and insecurities, but nothing that is absolutely limiting me from having what I want. If there's anything I need to work on though, is my relationship with money, particularly selling myself for what I'm worth.
Understanding procrastination and finding a wellspring of energy must be connected with a fear. Understanding that connection and facing the fear is a goal for the coming year. Perhaps not "overcoming" but understand!
Two fears: 1) never accomplishing anything important again; 2) being alone. Antidote? Ah, that's always the question.
Being alone. Allow myself to have more quiet times, alone.
I fear not accomplishing things that I set out to do. I fear squandering the potential and advantages that I'm given in this lifetime. I'm working on easing myself into a schedule that permits me to create after work, and I'm making progress thus far. I'll be seeing a counsellor to understand how to better myself for the coming year.
I continue to be overly concerned for my physical and mental health. The demands of care for my father are never ending. I try to take this day by day. I know there is no benefit in looking into the unknowable future. Work is my mental refuge. If and when.....I hope to be free & see my friends
Starting things. I am afraid of failure. And to be alone. So, i am starting my own company. Having no real backup plan. And working on leaving behind toxic relationships. Or rather yet, stop being toxic myself. Let's face it... the one thing they all had in common... was me.
I'm a little afraid of dying and leaving nothing behind, though in the 20,000-foot view, a "legacy" really holds no meaning. I'm maybe more afraid of losing the people (and animals) that are central to my life. I don't know that the fear has limited me so much as it has probably crippled me with some anxiety, leaving me nervous and stomach-sick, but it hasn't prevented me from doing anything I want to do. If anything, I think it has offered me moments of real gratitude, sitting with how much I love sharing the couch with my ball of a cat, or how much I appreciate being able to text my mom, or how much safety and calm it brings me to shift at night and see my husband next to me. I don't want to let that go or overcome it. I think this fear keeps me grateful.
I fear trying new things which are mechanical or technical in any way: sewing machine, new blender, etc. I plan to have a "procrastination list" where, for a short time each week, I do the avoided thing. Once I get started, these things aren't hard.
I don't talk in groups. Sometimes I say something, but mostly I listen. I often feel like someone has already said what I would have said, or that maybe my thoughts are not relevant. Sometimes I think I can't say it well enough so that people will understand my point. I see, though, at work that my colleagues do want to hear my ideas and greet them with positive responses. I need to keep focusing on that and let the fear go.
My fear this year is more practical than existential. I am getting older but I don't feel it mentally. But-it is real. We just bought 20 acres and we'll build on it and bring horses. Will I realistically be able to keep up with all the physical demands. I don't fret too much about it. I feel like I can and will. But it lurks.
I have had a fear of being vulnerable by putting myself out there as a writer and as someone who wants to build a life with another person. I have been terrified of rejection and facing more harsh people that I have decided to hide and be harsh on myself. That time needs to end. I need to do as Brene Brown says, and not fall into shame and allow myself to be vulnerable in order to move forward both in career and in love.
I am afraid that the people I love will think I'm crazy. This whole engagement thing has been so dramatic but it has honestly helped me care so much less about what people think of me. I know myself and I know what I want and people can disagree with me or judge me... and that's their stuff coming up. And if they need me to be the scapegoat, that's fine.
Fear of driving. i had an accident 2 years ago. I plan to drive again although i am affraid of having another accident. Some friends said that they will go in the car with me. I ubered a lot this past year, spent a lot of money.
Fear of being a father. I'm not sure how I can overcome this, there are just so many pitfalls, and I see so many people around me who are fathers that are doing such a great job at it yet I'm not sure I can do the same. I'm fearful of a difficult pregnancy. But we do want a child and we're not getting any younger. I think we just have to take the leap and do it.
I fear civic disintegration due to rampant disinformation and systemic disruption of moral norms, perpetuated by partisanship and plutocracy. I am triggered regularly / daily.. It is taking us too much psychic energy. I have to find a way to take action against this, and work it into my life. Then I have to reconcile myself to the part I can and will play in this, and channel my fears into activism. I hope to rely on that as my backstop - to corral my fears and acknowledge I'm doing what I can, to react to the next onslaught with intention and more calm.
My fear is that there is going to be a civil war in this country and that the people who have been arming themselves under cover of protecting themselves from government forces will come for us - regardless of who wins the election. I don't think I will let go of this fear.
My fear is to become sick and not be able to do things for myself. Working on being more assertive.
I am afraid that the wildfires will continue, the smoke exposures over time sending me to hospital for treatment, which will harm or kill me, due to my allergic and sensitivity reactions to both medications and chemicals used in commercial buildings. I will be more proactive and take in fewer activities that will expose me to toxins in the environment.
I have a fear of letting go and just leading. I always worry that I won't be good enough, or my voice won't sound good, or my sermons are banal and derivative, or my persona isn't rabbinic enough. Obviously that fear is in coexistence with its opposite. Like Simcha Bunim's story of the two notes in the pockets, both are useful. However, I'd like to adjust the ratio so that I don't feel so bad about myself and don't feel so overwhelmed by the prospect of leading.
I think the fear that has limited me the most over the course of my life is looking like an idiot. There are a lot of things I have wanted to do but haven't done because I've been so afraid that I'd do it badly or look stupid. I've missed out on a lot. I do think that after 30+ years I've realised that no one is really paying any attention, and if they are, they're not waiting for you to fuck up. Most people want you to succeed. So maybe that's something to think about.
Fear of judgment by others, of not being enough. I think it's meant I've accepted things that I should have challenged, meant I've not stood up for myself at times. It's also affected friendships - I struggle to accept I am enough, that people genuinely value me. That is shifting, I am working on trusting myself more, listening to myself rather than waiting for external validation. I think I need to work on this - figure out what I think/want/need rather than second guessing what others think. I place too much importance on that.
What life & the world will be like for my daughter. How do I plan to let it go? I don't know yet.
I’m scare of change. And this has completely paralised me often. I’m gonna push myself outside of my comfort zone!
My fear is that I will never find who I am and how I could achieve the things in life which makes me feel fulfilled. My fear is that I am stuck in one place and can’t find a way how to move out of it. I think my biggest fear is fear itself and I am afraid to accept it. Or I don’t know how to accept it.
I fear, as always, the embarrassment of failure. I don't want to be seen to have tried something and not made it. I'd rather give up before it gets there. I think I'd like to (going back to a previous question) explore the idea of mistakes and failures in a bit more detail. Our decisions take us down pathways which lead to outcomes that affect our lives - maybe there's no such thing as a failure. It's what you make of it. I want to stop being afraid of trying and failing. So what if I run a 4:01 marathon? I can do it next time. And if I try properly, I might get a 3:51!
I have come to realize that a lot of my life has been defined by fear. So many things I have been fearful of going for. Everything I have been fearful of happening, or going wrong. Not being able to put those fears aside and to just go for it. I was trained to be fearful from the very start. It’s part of my DNA. I have been thinking about this a lot this past year. What would my life have been like if I would have overcome these fears, or did not have them? Is it too late to change things now? Probably.
A fear of being alone. Of not finding someone and having a family. It's hard to let it go. But I somehow know that it won't happen. That true love is there for me. And that I can truly love myself as well. That I'll never be really alone. I always have myself and my friends/family.
Under the fear there is deep black despair. And anger. And grief. And pain and need for solace. Explore that, as safety permits. Be gentle.
This year my deep fear has shifted to money. I have more money than I have ever had, and yet now my fear is about scarcity of money. What would I do if... This rattles around my brain a lot. I am fearful of losing my job and not being able to provide for the kids. I'm scared that I am the one strut propping up this whole edifice and I am not reliable.
I feel like am afraid of everything. I always have been. I'm afraid of making the wrong decisions for my kids. I'm afraid of contracting COVID, especially because I have an autoimmune disease. I'm afraid of my depression. I know a lot of my fears stem from anxiety, but I can't always get my brain to rationalize that. I would love to let it all go, but I know if I'm being honest with myself, it won't happen any time soon, if at all.
I'm afraid of "losing" music in my life. I'm afraid I'm not good enough at it for it to be a real part of my identity. Which is so silly when I see myself writing it! Music always has and will be part of who I am. And being "good at it" isn't part of that, or anything to do with it really. I have new ideas on how I want to manifest more music in my life. But however it ends up being over this next year, I know that it won't change that I will always have it, and it will always have me :)
I have a fear of starting a new job which has held me back from leaving a job I hate. I hope to continue to be more active in my search for a new job.
I'm afraid of being at peace with myself and successful in maintaining my health and work life balance. I'm afraid of nefesh, to put it briefly. I think I fear that if I have time and space for nefesh, a time free from anxiety, that the worst of my mental illnesses will get the best of me, or that I will be bored or feel aimless because "I've arrived." So, instead I procrastinate, I engage in self-destructive behaviors like not taking my medication, overeating (especially less healthful choices), not exercising, procrastinating at work, procrastinating at housework, spending recklessly and impulsively. But the irony is that this has totally let my mental illness win; I'm in a constant state of agony and stress. If I just "did the thing" I would be at peace, and at a better position to deal with my illness. I won't let it win, anymore. Some days, it will still win, but I need to remember to not let those failures steal the rest of my week from me. Some is better than none, and this journey will require to be much better about self-forgiveness.
I fear not having enough money in the future to continue my current lifestyle and maybe even improve. Also I fear for my financial situation once I will have retired. It is far in the future but my actions now determine what will be tremendously. I might have to seek counseling for my Financials. I don't see me learning all by myself and applying it correctly I will need help for that.
I have a fear of not having a plan. I’ve always felt a need to plan my life, at least for the next few years. Now that I’m no longer following a strict education schedule I feel a lot of uncertainty in my life - what I want to do, where I want to end up. I need to work a lot on going with the flow, both on the micro and macro level. I’ve had to deal with it more this year since the pandemic has shaken things up a ton, of course. I’m trying to work towards being open to things not following a perfect schedule, and actually embracing the uncertainty. It’s decidedly a work in progress. In the next year, I want to focus on how to improve myself, my life, and the experiences for those around me - not just how I can get to the next stepping stone or “stage” of my life.
Fear has been pervasive in many ways. I overcame my fear to leave my former school, but then was hit with the fear of what is next. I feared teaching online, but just as I’m getting a handle on it, I now fear my students coming back to the school and all of our health being put at risk. I’m tired of being afraid this year.
I think at some point I became afraid of everything. Success and failure, letting people down and letting them think too highly of me. Afraid to make the wrong decision so much so that I don't make a decisions any more. I'm going to try to step out of my own way. Not over think things and say yes more often. I'm probably going to fail. but it's about trying. right?
I fear my home burning down again. I don't view this fear as limiting me. Fear is something I move through, somethings more slowly than other times which happily surprises... by how quickly the fear is removed through trust and the simplicity of making a positive decision.
Ive always feared what people have thought of me but no longer! I AM A POWERFUL AND STRONGER WOMAN AND PROUD! No one should care.
Trusting my intuition more and more; learning to develop my right brain more fully than ever
I fear disappointing others and not meeting my responsibilities. The problem is, my responsibilities are endless and others are endless so constantly living to meet everyone's needs leaves me exhausted and unhappy. It's critical to narrow my focus on survival, leaving room for happiness.
I have a repeated, significant fear of losing my job and ending up losing our house. It's not really rational, though at this point I'm not sure it's also not entirely unlikely. I know it's mostly just my Anxiety Brain trying to sabotage me, not letting me believe the people (including my boss) who tell me I'm doing a good job. I've started taking medication, but mostly it's just about shouting down my Anxiety Brain, because I know it can't be trusted.
Ignorance. I never saw it as something to be fearful of until this year. Now I realize that other than death it's the second most terrifying thing you have to deal with in your life. Ignorance in all it's form - vanity, ego, cognitive distortion, racism, bigotry, hatred, tradition, even just plain stupidity. I've come to realize there has never been a bigger threat to my life than the ignorance of those around me and those making decision for me. But I think what was most profoundly terrifying was the realization of my own ignorance. Of these rose colored glasses that I had about our country, our citizens...neighbors...relatives...friends. Perhaps I never wanted to dig deep enough to see it for what it really was. But my refusal to acknowledge how a single persons ignorance can swell into a movement that directly impacts my life and my children's lives...now that is a fear I just don't know how to overcome.
Like many white people, I am working to set aside my fears of getting it wrong when grappling with racial issues. Too often, this limits me from action. If I get something wrong, then it is an opportunity to learn and grow. So I am striving to lean into the discomfort and accept that I will not always get it right.
I have a fear of spiders. This is prevented me from living in basements. I will try to become one with the spiders this year.
Fear of failing. It’s limited me by stopping me from trying new things, failing, looking foolish, taking risks and learning. I will neutralize it with positive self talk, encouragement and surrounding myself with others who believe in me.
I have a fear that our American democracy is being permanently harmed. I fear what might happen in Nov. I fear that the pain and sorrow and hate and fear will win in this country.
I don't really have any major fears. I actually don't remember how I answered this question in previous years! Did I have notable fears then...? I'm afraid of losing loved ones to illness or accident, but not to the degree that it negatively affects my life.
Fear of taking up too much space. Fear of being misunderstood. I’m really trying to cultivate more ease in my life and think more strategically and less ego/emotionally in the moment. I plan to meditate more often, work with a dear friend and spiritual healer, and cultivate physical movement.
A fear of mine is getting back I got he world of dating after an abusive/toxic marriage and divorce. I plan on letting that fear go by using logic and putting in place all the hard lessons learned. I refuse to repeat things that didn’t work for me. I want to try something and someone new.
I still fear "losing it all" and it stops me from being able to take risks that could alter the trajectory of my life. I'd like to put myself in a position - financially, emotionally, spiritually, health-wise - to have this not be the case.
I still have the same fear as last year, that I will continue to wander forever, never figuring out my life's purpose. I now know that isn't true. I will undoubtedly choose to do things that are meaningful for me, and through those choices, over time, my life will take on purpose. But frankly, I'm starting to wonder if this notion is serving me well at all. It may be that the best way of overcoming this fear is challenging the notion underpinning it - maybe, my life doesn't have to be purposeful at all. Maybe, it just has to be enjoyable. This won't be an easy mental shift to make, but I'm going to try to work on that this year.
Fear that I will continue to rage over all the things that are wrong in our country -- white supremacists, the NRA, lack of gun control/background checking, anti-abortion activists/single issue voters, dark money, trump if he wins again (or refuses to step down), hypocrisy in government/idiot politicians with no scruples or backbone. The list goes on. Haven't figured out yet how to let it go but I sure need to! And soon!
I don't really voice my fears well. I'm not really so much a fearful person these days, as a cautious one. Most of the limits of fear that I have, come from supporting others in their right to have theirs. I don't act because I fear giving reasons to others to fear me. My fears are all around rejection and lack of touch. I fear being seen as weird or desperate or in need of others. I fear being seen as weak or a coward, or insensitive, or racist or apathetic or ineffective. Likewise, though, I also fear being overtly aggressive or angry or violent. I fear my deeper instincts right now that are telling me to fight, when I know that flight is better. I suppose the biggest fear is swiftly becoming realized, and I'm not scared or frightened, just determined; We can't let the bastards win, and I may have to prove that I mean it. I fear for my country.
I am afraid of failure and my inadequacy. I’m terrified of being found out as a fraud. I have no idea what I’m doing. That’s really why I resigned my position. I didn’t really know how to do the job, and I couldn’t handle the pressure any more. I don’t know how to let it go or overcome it. All I do is keep showing up. I go to work (most of the time) even when I don’t want to. I call parents. Even when I don’t want to. I respond to emails. Even when I don’t want to. I do it. Because what is the other option? I have bills to pay and a life to live. What else do you do?
I fear myself or one of my family dying from Covid-19. I fear myself or one of my family becoming an invalid or suffering life long side affects from the disease. I don't want to leave my children without a mother. I don't know how we would manage if we lost my husband. I don't know if any of us would make it if one of my children died. It has stopped me from attending gatherings. The fear keeps me from allowing my children to do things like hugging a friend or even sitting too close together at a picnic table. It makes me look like a paranoid freak to those who don't share my concerns. I am concerned that I may be damaging my kids mental health in an attempt to protect our physical health. I don't know how to let this fear go. Maybe once there is a vaccine I will be able to begin letting it go. Right now I'm just fighting every day, in every interaction with someone other than my children and husband, not to let the fear overpower me.
The fear that I will never truly be safe, and that love is temporary and conditional. I am creating safe spaces, by building unbreakable bonds with people who are shaping into the family I never really had. I am digging deep into the causes of the fears, knowing I have this family to protect me. I have so much love surrounding me now, even as I isolate physically, that I can finally give mine to the inner child that has been cowering in fear for so, so long.
One fear I continue to have is not being good enough. I have struggled with imposter syndrome and feeling not qualified enough to be in the spaces I am in. This year, I plan on reminding myself that I am just as worthy of all my accomplishments as everyone else is. I also want to keep doing things that are outside my comfort zone to try new things and discover new strengths.
Even though I've been promoted at work, I still have a fear that I am not cut out for managing a nonprofit, especially a music focused one. Initially, I thought that this would be a job that I could take for a little while for some experience, and then move up to something else. But I think that thought came from a fear that I wasn't good enough to stick with it. Maybe I can actually become someone important with a bit of sway in the world.
My fear is I don't have a stable career that I can rely on to provide for my family of the future. I have to accept that I should find a job that I am more interested in, and I also have a partner that's willing to support me.
I’m terrified of losing a past client to suicide or overdose. I know it’s possible because of the population I work with, but I fear that it’ll weigh on me for the rest of my life. I also know that there’s only so much I can do. I plan to acknowledge and accept the limitations of my work as a therapist, without minimizing the powerful work I do. I also hope to work on dealing with things as they come, rather than worry about futures that may never come to fruition.
I have a fear of speaking up when I disagree. I have been practicing this at work and with my husband, with good results. It will be hardest to speak my "truth" with my friends and my siblings. I don't want to make waves or hurt feelings, but I think (and hope) they will appreciate my authenticity. I need to do it for myself, though.
The rapid destruction of democracy under this Republican administration and the hate fueled Trump Presidency. Taking action by donations of time and money to renew democracy. Working to help elect better people to local town council positions. Helping my daughter run for School Board in her town
That i'm not enough, or that I don't matter to others. That they won't want to hear what I have to say, or work with my ideas, or that my "work" (paid, volunteer, etc.) isn't good/smart/innovative/etc enough. I've also had alot of people take credit for my work though while I stood in the shadows and allowed it to happen, or have let it go in the name of "playing nice". I need to work on not only letting this fear go but also on setting firmer boundaries for myself, and truly believing I am worthy of all that I seek; that I am good enough, have all the knowledge and experiences I need, just as I am today.
I fear loneliness in my life as I spend more time in my single apartment during the pandemic. I, fortunately, see family regularly, but they can only fill that void up to a certain extent. I miss interacting with friends in person, going to a bar/restaurant, and not having to worry about being too close to someone. Also being able to travel (particularly on airplanes) without concern of potential infection. I've begun exploring ways to combat this virtually, as well as ordering take out from local bars/restaurants as often as possible to support them and keep them in business.
This is so silly, but I have a completely paralyzing fear of snakes. Its really so bad that it causes me distress when I am out hiking. I really hate it too. I love hiking and camping and fishing in the creek, but I am almost hindered by this fear. I have pushed through it to do the activities but it can be severely stressful for me and it ruins my full enjoyment of the activity. I have been trying to learn about snakes, specifically rattle snakes as they are the main poisonous species here. I plan to learn all I can and just try to be careful and vigilant while trying to not let it consume me.
In question 8 I talked about my fear of dying. I don't know all the ways of letting go or overcoming it but one way will be to talk about it with my psychologist.
I don't take myself seriously. Or rather, I underestimate myself. What's possible, even if there are years to train or prepare. I would love to let that go, so much. Surrounding myself with people that I love and find inspiring is really helping. I don't know if i can let it go. I hope to.
My biggest fear right now is leaving teaching. Honestly, just thinking about it makes my heart heavy. I know that the time is coming. As much as I love teaching and working as a teacher in schools, I know that this can't be my life. There's just not enough money in it to make it sustainable. It fucking sucks. Thinking about it makes me burst into tears almost immediately. I feel a deep sense of loss and grief when I think about having to move into another profession. I will miss the kids so much and I will miss the fun of managing a classroom and facilitating lessons. I'll miss preparing for a new school year and planning the arc of lessons. I'll miss getting to know kids during downtime. I'll miss supporting parents. I will even miss monitoring the hallways. I think that fear has limited me financially. I also think it has limited me from considering other possibilities for my life. I'm thinking about moving into psychology and becoming a therapist. My fear of leaving teaching is absolutely keeping me from envisioning what else is possible for my life. I don't know how I'm going to let it go. Honestly, I think one of the only good things to come out of this pandemic is that being a teacher really sucks right now. It is not fun and it is so much follow-up, tracking students down, and tech support. That may work in my favor and give me some courage to leave teaching. Plus, I'm also in therapy, so that helps. Lastly, I think I just need to compartmentalize and just apply to the program. It doesn't mean that I can't do something I love. It just means it might be time to move on.
In recent years I've started to fear rejection more and it's led me to be less outgoing and more in a shell that I never used to have. When I was younger I had a more carefree outlook and didn't really care what others thought of me, so was quite bold. I think recently I've allowed myself to become too consumed with what others think and I've noticed this in certain moments when I allow myself to come out. I feel so much more like myself when I let myself run free. I plan to over the coming year allow myself to reopen more and be myself again, not worrying as much about fitting in or pleasing other people. I'm better when I can be my true self.
I am afraid that I won’t have saved enough money and Jon and I will be flat broke when we retire. I definitely want to be more self-disciplined when it comes to finances - I seem to have fallen off the bandwagon since dealing with infertility. My plan is to be more mindful about my spending as well as have specific non-negotiable spending goals that come first.
I am afraid that I will die unloved and alone. I'm working on it, it's entirely unreasonable.
I don't know, maybe that I'll never be on top of my life and I'm less lovable because of it. I'm not sure there's an easy answer to this one - I have to keep working on my weak spots - keep trying to clean, and try and upkeep myself, and sometimes my boyfriend gets frustrated with me and that makes me feel unlovable. I don't see how I can 'let it go', I know I need to do better with upkeep - or I don't know, go back for an ADHD diagnosis again? When I get stressed out my brain goes in a million different directions and that makes it hard for me to focus. Maybe I need to work on stress management. I'm not sure. don't know how to grow my self esteem anymore, I really don't. I know I'm a good person and I'm intelligent, and I know I'm working my hardest on everything...so it's also frustrating when it's still not enough - when you put your all into something and it's not enough - but I also know that's a feature of society nowadays, so it's not just me and it's not all my fault.
Easy. The fear of contracting COVID and dying. Always introverted and shy but now it’s become even worse. I go to one job, then the other job, then home. Other than quick grocery trips, that’s it. I haven’t even practiced yoga in studio since reopening (despite the fact that I work there 4-5 nights per week... just doesn’t feel right). How do you overcome or let that go?
I have a fear of loss. I'm afraid of losing someone close to me unexpectedly. I try to overcome it by cherishing every moment, but I think that I can do that more joyfully and more fully in the year to come. I just want to know that I gave people my best while I was in their lives and while they were in mine.
I am frightened that the orange asshole will be reelected. I am astonished that sane people can consider voting for him in light of his behavior. I will start counseling on Tuesday so i can deal with this. I've warned Michael that I would seriously leave the country if I don't feel safe. He is evil.
Fear of change. It has limited me in feeling a loss of independence as we entered shelter in place and the pandemic while I was pregnant. I thought I had a few more months before being significantly limited by pregnancy. Lately, fear of change has made it hard to prepare for the baby as I would like, hard to accept changes in my body. I plan on trying to remind myself that everything is temporary - even the things I want to hang on to, they are also temporary.
I worry that democracy is dying. I worry that Jews aren't welcome here in the US. I worry that the checks and balances won't hold. I'm working on getting out the vote. How can you prevent someone from cheating when the game is rigged? (I'm looking at you McConnell and Barr.)
Fear? Right now the fear is for the upcoming election. I don't know how to get past that except to wait for Nevember.
My answer from last year stands--even more so. Here it is: I am terrified for the country and the world. However, I would say that rather than limiting me, that fear has empowered me. I feel like the only way we get through the forces of authoritarian power and evil here, in Israel, in Europe, and really around the world, is to stand up to them in every possible way. Through this year, that's what I'll be doing to the very best of my ability. However, there is a very real chance that my dad will die in the next year. That does not terrify me, but it is an unknown. I do not know what I will do or how I will react.
That's a big questions. Let's just say I'm actually planning to do some trauma work with. my therapist, and we'll see how that goes.
Two fears: 1. Having some of the less admirable content I have viewed online come back to haunt me. Your digital footprint never goes away, and while I am vowing to cease that activity, my past is unerasable from the internet. I hope that the farther back in time that footprint gets (with no recurrences), the less likely it will be to haunt me. 2. This country is in a volatile position because of the potential violence/constitutional crisis that could result from the presidential election results. Combining forces with that problem is the social justice push. Together, they could create chaotic conditions this country has not seen on its shores since the Civil War. All I can do is be a beacon of positivity. I will promote social justice in a quiet, but profound way. As an example, I recently dismissed the thoughts of a fellow caucasian colleague with whom I was serving meals at a soup kitchen. He had offhandedly remarked that "blacks shouldn't be causing problems. They're not slaves anymore."
I'm a little nervous about how all this big change will impact my mental health. Moving, having a baby - basically my life is going to look very different. I know I have tools to handle things now, but these are some unknown challenges. I'm going to remind myself that I am strong and am ready for this!
I have a fear of damaging my kid emotionally or intellectually or otherwise stunting her growth. I also have a fear of being challenged on my value/worth/intellect. I would like to address the first by focusing more on the second and increasing my self-confidence. I think the best way to overcome this fear is to jump into the void and commit myself to some things I have avoided, but honestly, I am not even sure how I would address this fear. I have been stuck on auto pilot for so long, not challenging myself in my career. But at least I am a very good mom and am loving being a mom. Every day I get to spend with my kid is a joy.
My constant fear is that people don't really like me, and it limits me when in new groups and new places. I create a wall of words and tell stories and try to make people laugh, but I don't really connect. Is it me who doesn't like other people? Maybe! I don't have a plan for overcoming it. i think it's my protective coating. People who have been my friends for years sometimes have to reassure me. Sometimes I believe them.
I'm sometimes afraid that I'm not good at my job, and I think it makes me freeze up. I think I'd like to work harder to lean into the discomfort and work on my growth areas.
Losing my job at age 60 and gaining weight. I did everything right, worked hard, showed up, participated in all the company rah,-rah, continuous improvement crap, etc. I moved to a state I didn't want to live. I bought (another house), rented my original home. So much stress. So much traffic. So much bad management. Hostile work environment. So many added pounds from stress & thyroid. Then, they ended my job. The final nail was the pandemic. Long story short, my greatest fear came true. I lost my job at 61. It cost me nearly all my savings to sell my house and move back to the place I should have never left. I qualified for the "retirement" package, so I received 6 months wages & insurance. So many people were simply fired and lost everything immediately. I know how lucky I am and how much I have. It has been a gift. It's coming to an end, but not having to worry about an income has allowed me to really explore other options. The pandemic has forced us all to think differently. About everything.
God question. I've always had a fear of failure and a fear of disappointing others. This comes directly from my childhood - I had to be successfully. I felt that responsibility towards my Mom, who sacrificed a lot for me and who endured several traumas in her life. I wasn't going to be another thing to let her down. On one hand, that propelled me to do well and develop into a successful, healthy adult. However, I also played it safe and some areas and chose things that were comfortable as opposed to what my real passions were, particularly in terms of my career. In the past year, I've taken steps to do some thing in tune with the "real me" even if it inconveniences others or if they don't understand. I plan to keep tuning into that. I have a fitness accountability group of women who keeps my focused on that goal. I need to continue carving out small amounts of time to explore other things of interest on my own. I love listening to podcasts that help affirm these philosophies so I need to continue making a point of listing to those as well.
I'm afraid of this political situation continuing. The damage it would do to everything American is undeniable. It's horrifying. My fear is getting in the way of my self control, planning for the future. I'm not sure I have the strength now to let it go in the next year if I can't manage it in a month.
Fear and anxiety have been a hallmark of this year. What comes to mind first, however, is the fear that I'm not doing enough or the right things to make a change in the world. That fear has frozen me into inaction at times. I hope that in the next year I can recognize that any step is better than doing nothing.
I'm afraid of being appearing to ask for more than I deserve, over reach, of ask to be in a place where I might not fit it. I don't want to be mocked or laughed at, even if I never know it happened. It has significantly limited the jobs I apply for and the opportunities I seek. It holds me back. In a few minutes I'm going to apply for a job that I'm scared to apply for. I'll sit with the fear and in a week or so I will sit with whatever shame I feel if I don't hear back from them. I'll just try to desensitize myself, I guess.
I fear...not being able to do what I need to do. But, the fear is compounded by realizing that I shouldn't have to do so much. So something I really want to focus on during this year is saying NO in a clearer way, and sticking with that.
I still suffer from the exact same fear daemons. Less, but they persist
Same as last year: Fear for planet Earth and all Life. Fear - many times compounded - for the United States - which isn't really united any more - and certainly isn't a democracy. Fear about the upcoming election. Meditation and prayer helps. So does reading uplifting material and going to ACA. Coaching/being a sponsor - making a difference for others. Landmark. Hearing soothing music. Spending time with friends.
I fear that as self-emplyed person, I'm always having a thought in the back of my mind about work, and not being present in the moment. I plan on continuing traditions like taking a tech Shabbat and not using my phone or computer on Saturdays, in order to give myself a space from work.
I am limited by social anxiety. After Oneg on Friday nights I second guess half of the comments and responses I made. I continue to go because I love Eruv Shabbat service, it's such an important time of week for my husband, and I feel like I just need to do it to overcome it... even though sometimes I have to take a benzo on the way home. I'm afraid that after this strange time of COVID is over, it will be even more challenging for me to go to Friday evening services. If need be, I'll take my benzo before the service is over for the first few weeks. But I don't plan on letting this get in the way of our relationship with Sabbath service.
I have done a lot of work to let go of things like jealousy-which speaks to me about fear of loss or inadequacy. Last year my answer was rejection and how I had been letting go of that with my own brand of nihilism. I think the next project will me the fear of being misunderstood. Which is a hard one to tackle. It will mean going back and working more on my communication. I like to believe I am a spectacular communicator, but I found myself in some old habits in one of my relationships. As soon as I realized I did the exact opposite of my knee-jerk repetitive cycle-and that had very positive results. It also means continuing to look back at myself WHILE I communicate with someone. What do I want them to know? What are they trying to tell me? What will the words I choose mean to this person in particular? Could my words give them a different feeling than it does to me? What is the goal of this communication? Am I trying to be heard, or understood.....?
Again: my body. It being larger, although I think this year (or now, in September 2020) I am feeling more accepting of it. Still struggling with exercising due to an awareness of past habits when I was anorexic and binge exercising, and how easily my brain slips into excessive exercise. But I feel softer with my body now, mainly due to the pain it is in, the potential of having osteoporosis at 30, a constant reminder that if I did go back to my ED ways my body would be done for. It would be a death sentence/suicide in a long painful way. So yes, I have bought new clothes that are colourful and fun, and a bigger size than I actually need. I'm probably only a 16/18 UK but it's difficult when I used to be an 8. No matter how many terrible things I did to myself to be an 8. Also the fear of being a failure.
I fear suffering, rejection (both losing people but also being found wanting? Failure?) and probably more suffering. I...think these are probably only going to be better managed, not done away with altogether.
My continued irrational illogical physiological fear that lives in my body is repeating errors at work that lead to consequences. So far the worst mistakes that have happened at work have been “only human” and not had significant real consequences. The have been worked out at a professional level. However my own conscience is a harsh arbiter, hence the fear lives on.
Giving up this job - I love the kids, and I am good at what I do, but I am treated like crap and am hanging on mostly because of fear, lack of new work and insurance. I have also learned to just roll with it - that I can't change many things....just be my best self.
I have a fear of everything. but I don't know that it's holding me back particularly. I mean what would I do if I weren't afraid? Jump out of an airplane? Maybe it's good to be scared.
My fear IS fear. I want to be active and brave and take chances and put myself out there. I want to think of the best case scenario and move toward that. Living in the moment, letting go of the past me and past hurts etc. meditation and gratitude are what will do it!
Of course I fear either getting Covid 19 or having a family member get it. I wish I had complete control. WE will all do our best wear masks, social distance and try to avoid risky situations.
My fear that something will happen to Penny never leaves. I check on her before I go to bed, just to make sure she's breathing. I don't think this is something I can 'let go' or even 'overcome', but I'm learning to live with it.
I am afraid of our president. I don't plan on letting it go.
Right now, mostly I think I fear getting COVID. And of course, it's been limiting. Overcoming it feels like a process of assessing risk, and waiting for vaccines and/or treatments, or a greatly reduced transmission rate because people are wearing their masks properly.
I have a creeping fear of my spouse dying and being alone. The fear/concern crescendos with being alone and needing help with no one to rely upon. We have no children. The help I'd need is more an overseer of my care in my home. He'll be 77 this year and it feels as if he's slowing down, a bit slower responding to things, and creepily sometimes seems to be getting his "stuff" in order. That amplifies the sense that much of our life together is now past; the pandemic makes it worse because it feels as if we're wasting/losing precious time.
I’m always afraid of being in a position where I’m not knowledgeable enough or I dont Know what to do next. I’ll be overcoming it by learning everything I can About every single thing I can.
I'm so afraid of asking for help. Every time it comes up I ask with great reluctance and assuming they'll say no or something terrible will happen. And of course nothing terrible happens, because the people around me love me and want to help! I've had several object lessons in that this year, so my plan is to remember those lessons and remember how it felt, to ask and not die.
Why does this never change? It's always shame and rejection. I don't have any grand plans for letting it go or overcoming it. What I would like to do is keep slowly chipping away at it until I eventually realize that it's no longer paralyzing me as much. That's all I can do.
I am terrified of making a bad decision, of ruining my life, of a lack of stability. I am scared of being poor and miserable. I'm encountering that right now with my fear of going back to grad school. Sure, I can be reassured temporarily by the reminder that I'm about as well-positioned to do it as I can be; but also, I want to work to make the world a place where fewer people are condemned to abject poverty with a brief sequence of bad days or misfortunes.
I have a fear of lack or not having enough. It limits me in that I am afraid to try something that may take away what "little" I have and will never get again. My intention is to give it to God and let him handle it. My intention for the coming year is to Let Go and Let God for the coming year.
I fear being dismissed, I fear dismissiveness. I wonder if that means I am dismissive of others. I fear not having meaning in my life. I think that means I should just accept that there isn't meaning and move on and do the best I can. We never know whether outcomes of our actions will be positive or negative or both or what anyway.
My biggest fear by far is irrelevancy--that nothing I do or ever have done will actually matter even a little bit.
I think the feel of failure / inadequacy still haunts me. I have taken a lot of risks this year and grown from it immensely and made myself vulnerable to failure. I want to keep doing this in the future and make sure I get what I deserve in all my relationships/ life.
It's a fear I learned as a child because of my cruel 'mother,' the fear of being seen, noticed, and judged negatively. I plan to continue working at letting that fear go, and getting to believe that I am fine, maybe better than just fine!, exactly as I am.
I fear traveling. Even by car where I am in my domain and safe. I have a fear being out in public. I have a fear of being shot or in a shooting. I have a fear Trump will get elected again. None of this has limited me but it has made my IBS get worse at times. I can’t get a wax because of it. I am limited in going to places that don’t have bathrooms. It’s debilitating to be like this. All from stress.
I'm afraid of being a bad mom and bad wife. I'm worried I don't belong at business school, that I'll fail out or not get a job and all that money will be for naught and just debt. I am hoping to overcome it by just getting through business school, and my daughter not dying. I probably should have a better system for overcoming fear. Maybe that's what I should work on.
I feel like my life has been consumed by fears recently. Fear of others, fear of myself, fear of so many different things. The one I will pick is fear of asking for help. Fear that I'm not deserving enough of help, fear that help will not come, fear that all the help in the world will not be enough. I wish to let go of this fear in the coming year by reminding myself that I am worthy of help, that people are there to help me, and that there is indeed help. I hope to recognize the support system that I have built, my friends and family who care about me and want to see me grow and prosper. I don't expect that I will laugh at this answer when I see it next year, but I hope that it feels like it was written at a very different time in my life.
That's easy! I'm always afraid when I'm not making a living. It's particularly difficult now as consulting jobs are hard to come by with Covid 19. Lots of competition. I try not to be too anxious about money. I say things to myself like "everything will be ok" and "there will always be enough". Having grown up in a poor family where money was always an issue doesn't help. And it's not just the money, it's having a job, an identity! My work has always been a large part of who I am! Who am I without a career?
My fear from last year has rounded up and over. All in all, I fear that I'm not worthy or deserving. I fear I have no power. I fear I'm an imposter who doesn't deserve the things she wants. It's time I swallow it. In the next year, I plan on starting. My fear always keeps me from starting. As my high school biology teacher used to say, the hardest part is starting. Of course, the first will be rough. But I have to start the first to complete the second.
I am both of afraid of being not good enough and of being great. As an artist, I feel the somewhat universal complex of inferiority-superiority. This fear has stopped me from fully committing to my dreams and really going for it. I am afraid that if I try I will fail, but also that I will succeed. I don't know how to let go of this fear. I must be brave and have courage. Bravery does not mean you aren't afraid; it means you're afraid and you do it anyway. I plan on overcoming this fear by creating in spite of it, welcoming it as fuel for my songwriting, and using that vulnerability to be more humble and authentic.
I'm still really hampered by my fear of not being good enough. And of people really perceiving me as not good enough. As I've been pushed into more of a leadership role in the past year, I've gotten a lot of feedback about my shortcomings (not assertive, not using critical thinking, not fast enough, not independent enough.) Sometimes I think that people's perceptions of me are off, and sometimes I completely agree and think I should quit and become a librarian in my hometown. I need to get over my fear of failure, or at least confront it and battle with it.
Well, I have been thinking about inviting others to be part of my content, whether interviewing them for a podcast, or asking them to write something for my email newsletter, or a daily social media post for a month. I don't consider myself an "out in front" person and so I keep holding myself back, waiting for the perfect moment or the perfect concept.
I'm afraid that if I ask the surgeon to amputate my foot, I'll regret not having it anymore. But my disability is severely limiting all aspects of my life. I'm tired of living this way. Something has to change in the coming year.
I am most concerned about personal health issues and what I can do to reduce the threat of pre-mature death. From diet, to exercise, to preventive health screenings, I want to be even more proactive regarding my health. I already do the diet and exercise thing and I see my primary care Doctor once a year, but I think there may be more that I should be doing - proactively.
I am terrified of climate change, of Trump being re-elected, of continued injustice and inequality. I need to see movement in the direction of good. I have no idea hope I am going to cope if this continues.
I have a fear of some people trying to cheat me. Do more due diligence.
Fear of writing. Holy cow it has stopped me in my tracks. But is it really a fear of writing I wonder? Or fear of something else. Liz Gilbert says what we fear Most has already happened - and usually by our own voice. I hope to gain a better relationship with fear so it won’t stop me.
Right now I feel paralyzed by worries, some without names, but it hard to think about fears. I am afraid of fire and homeownership now, as a result of the garage/house fire in July and the recent fires across the West Coast. I am afraid of burning to death. That's new. It seems human and I am trying to love it in me, to thank my brain for learning that, and for working to keep my safe. I don't really have a plan beyond that.
I fear that America is doomed. The dismantling of certain norms and the outright racism has me fear that we are sliding backwards in a lot of ways. This next year I plan on voting no matter what I have to do to get there or how long I have to wait and being true to my values in the face of whatever I encounter.
The same as last year: My fear of initiating contact with others has limited my developing social relationships. I plan on trying to reach out to people at events, classes, etc. I attend. Hopefully I will meet one or more people that I can develop more than an acquaintance relationship with.
I think I’m afraid of people thinking I’m a joke or that I’m more “pretty” than I am talented. Or that I’m not smart. So I often feel the need to overcompensate and to prove to everyone around me that they’re wrong. I don’t really know how to get past it or anything you know? Like is it a bad thing that I’m working so hard to prove people wrong?
My fear has always been time related.. that I'm not fitting it in... too much to do, too little time. Also the belief that I'm no good with finance.. I plan to make sure it all changes next year. Working on it already, but it won't be effective till the new year. I plan to put in place the things that I want to do .. to live life. It will happen in 2021.
I really don't have any fears.
I don't know! I don't live in a place of fear. Right now i'm terrified about the election, Trump not conceding power, literal civil war something similar, being on the right side of history. I'm scared of mediocrity and not doing enough. I don't know how this fear limits me, honestly. I really don't.
My anxiety/fear of not being good enough, or that something is inherently not good or nice about me has limited me IN EVERY ASPECT of my life. I am working on believing in my worth as a child of God and allowing Him to transform me into His image. Seeking His will for me will be how I overcame this deeply held belief/fear/anxiety.
I have the fear that I'll never finish writing my memoir and that it'll forever be the project left undone. I must start writing regularly - schedule it - make a date with myself to write.
I fear that tRump and GOP will somehow enable him to stay in office. I sure thought Clinton was going to win in 2016. This time I'm not sure how the election will turn out. I give $$ to Dem's campaigns and plan on volunteering this coming week, but I can't let it go.
I have held the fear of not being good enough or smart enough so much this year. With the company I work for being ripped apart, 100 people being made redundant and all of us being asked to reapply for our jobs, I’ve felt constantly in question over my abilities, feeling undervalued and under appreciated but unable to stand up for myself and what I think I deserve. With some support from my wonderful husband I managed to communicate a little that I felt I deserved to be treated better but it’s been a tough journey. Next year I have no idea how to tackle This, in another time I’d be putting in place a career plan and looking for other jobs that can advance me, but with a baby on the way I have felt a bit trapped. I hope next year to be able To spend some time thinking about what I want from a job now that I’m a mother and find a way to let go of the fear that I’m not smart enough or good enough to get what I deserve.
The fear of driving has kept me from learning. I haven’t been able to do important things for my family as a result of this fear. I’m going to get a license.
The current fear is the virus. Not sure how to let that particular fear go, as I think it’s a reasonable fear to have, but I am TRYING to not let it control me. While I’ve had a few emotional breakdowns, I like to think I’ve done a decent job of coping, especially given that, as a single woman, I’m doing it alone. Haven’t been hugged in over 6 months, which is weird. At least I have my kitties. I will probably just keep buying cute masks and having virtual happy hours (w/a limited number of in-person ones) until this thing passes.
I have a big fear that this country is becoming one that I no longer recognize and respect. There is a darkness over the land. The climate is being ruined, white supremacists are empowered, minorities and Jews are the subject of increased attacks, and people are polarized. We have a major Asshole as president, and 40% of the country seems to love him unconditionally. I don’t understand. So yes, I am certainly fearful. It is limiting me in that I don’t trust people as much as I used to. I look with suspicion on those who are Trumpers. I don’t feel comfortable traveling to some parts of the country. I don’t feel comfortable speaking my mind for fear of reprisal. Even if Biden wins, I think our country will be a mess for some time. If tRump wins, I may think of selling everything and moving to a friendly, less gun crazy place.
I have come to realize that stress has been severely limiting my world. I am fairly stress reactive. It has disrupted my sleep, kept me from feeling and being open to the possibility of pain. I have lived in a way that has been in relation to stress. So I have been trying to manage it by accepting and approaching feeling. But also walking, cutting down on caffeine, a wee bit at least. I want to be more open to experiencing, even if that involves pain.
I have a fear that I'll lose everything because my finances are in such bad shape. I hope to find a professional home buyer who will trade me a small house they flipped for mine.
I guess of fear of not being good enough, of not living up to expectations of my abilities that others have for me. I plan on reading my Bible more and thinking of myself less. And trying to guess what others are thinking of me less.
I have always been told I am ugly and worthless. I want to see if this is true. What if it is?
I'm not sure really. I'm afraid of success and of failure. I would like to not give a flying fuck about much of anything anymore.
The larger answer is political. I feel so frightened about the direction our country is moving in that I sometimes forget to have trust. As a Jew it can be terrifying when I let it. My hope is to embrace what I feel & accept it as honest, to make friends with it so that I can walk calmly with it instead of allowing it to take charge.
The only fear that I am really conscious of is the fear of dying - not the being dead part, but the scary part of dying. Dad doesn't seem to have any anxiety about this, but I'm not there yet.
I struggle with being right. Being perfect. Being ridiculed for making mistakes or not knowing things. I freeze up with worry because it won't be right or good enough and don't do a thing. Don't submit a photograph. Don't take a photograph. Don't submit writing. Don't try new things. Don't apply for an interesting position. I want to embrace the idea that good is a goal, that I'm capable, that my effort is better than most people's best.
I'm afraid of not having the freedom to learn about what I want and to work on the projects I would like to. I'm not sure how to let it go, or overcome it, but I feel like working on such projects would help to some degree.
That I will be stuck in an unhappy miserable marriage because I don’t have a way to support myself and my son...or that I will be unwilling to change and stick to what will work to make my marriage happier! Another fear is that my health will never get better even after trying everything!
I am afraid of the election, and what if Donald Trump is reelected. I'm also scared of dying too soon, without being able to spend many decades with my new love. I can only try to stay more in the moment, and take each challenge as it comes.
My fear of disappointing people has been holding me back significantly. I am trying to let this go and be clearer with myself about what my boundaries are so I can communicate them with other people. I have to just internalize that it is ok to take care of me as well as other people.
I am afraid that I'll be dissatisfied with our choice for retirement location. Unhappy, a fish out of water, away from all that is familiar and out of reach of a familiar support network. Since the change itself is inevitable, I need to work to change myself to embrace the new with a positive outlook.
I fear that I cannot do it all. Being a working mom is terrifying especially being a perfectionist. This limits me in making me focus to much and making sure I accomplish everything. Over the next year (and my lifetime) I want to work on focusing on the present and letting go of the things that may not matter. My house doesn’t need to be spotless, I don’t have to be in perfect shape (just healthy!), and daycare will be good socialization for my child.
I am afraid of making a wrong life choice. It no longer affects my work, but it now affects my relationship. I plan on focusing on the upside, and not letting fear of change freeze me into avoidance. It's ok to explore plan B and C options, but I do need to explore.
I guess if you're I have is fully descending into a zombie apocalypse. If the orange man steals the election again, there is no hope for this country. I must get out or I will die trying. I don't think I can let go of this fear as it is very rational and real. We have already seen this year how society can descend into chaos just by going to Costco in March. I can't take it. I think the only way I can overcome it is to GTFO this miserable country.
My biggest fear is to be fired, not be able to find another job and not being able to provide for my family. I would love to be able to publish more, have more exit options. I would love to find a possible way to gather alternative income sources, to secure what I will do after leaving my current job. I would love to be brave enough to start a new company.
Keep up my Cognitive Behavioural Therapy that I learned over the course of this year to manage my anxiety. I've already seen so much improvement and feel so much better, so just keep pushing forwards!
I think this question is too one-dimensional for my life right now. My fear of letting others down outweighs my fear of not developing and letting my own light shine. Both fears have useful roles, but mine are miscalibrated. If I knew how to reweight them I would have done so already; this badly-packed backpack has slowed me for decades. Maybe I can try to channel, every day, my inner tennis player who is able, when down 1-5 to Joe, to still go for the most aggressive serve and swing for deep corners. I keep a different score in my head on the court: bold shots (whether they go in or not) vs. double-faults plus dumb shots, and try to make sure the former is higher. This year I will try a weekly life tally: times I boldly tried or invested in items on my Be/Make the Change You Want to See list vs. times I stepped in to help but could have delegated or coached or passed.
I fear that I'm not treating people well. There are times when I feel that I'm a crappy caregiver to my dad, an unpleasant person/wife with my meltdowns. I'll continue with my therapy.
I'm afraid of being alone. For the next year I want to work on myself and realize that to find my beshert I need to love myself first.
I think I'm fairly good in the fear department. I am neither filled with, nor completely lacking fear. Although I am a little fearful that someone in my house may not survive virtual learning, but it might be any of us ;)
I'm afraid of not getting my doctorate. Something always seems to get in the way. I plan to stay the course this time, no matter what. I was too depressed last time that I let that dream slip through my fingers and I feel more alive now on this track.
My fear--well concern, not outright fear--is that one or all of our parents will succumb to various illnesses during this time and we will not be able to travel to the funeral or mourn them together with siblings. We are the only ones not in driving distance to our parents, and not being able to see my family members who are far away has heightened my sense of isolation during COVID. It is difficult to let go of an awareness that I haven't seen them in more than a year (or longer) and likely won't see them for at least 8-9 months.
To be truthful, I fear conflict with others. I don’t like it and I can become defensive and feel threatened and express my discontent in agitated ways. This is true towards my wife, my daughter and my friends. I would like to be more centered, more sure of myself and better able to communicate without becoming angry.
I have feared being rejected by my daughter. I have overcome this with her concerted efforts to avoid this. I believe I have found the balance, with her help, to share as a mother/ friend rather than sharing as to a freind/peer. This means I don't over share what is on my mind, but stick to the present to enjoy current news, offering advice that is asked for and appreciated. I have let go of useless heartburn of not being her total confidant as she is blessed to have a wonderful partner who merits that role. I hope that I remain mindful of this and don't "relax" and make any careless remarks in humor that are taken to heart because child are so sensitive to the possiblility of parental criticism at any age
I fear that isolation comes too easily to me. I used to fear dying alone; I haven't in a long time but I'm very aware that I've done badly at keeping up with my friends in lockdown. I worked hard to get rooted in my community and I feel like that has all been taken away from me.
I think that the fear from last year of sabotaging my relationship is still very much there. Though the pandemic has put strain on the relationship that was out of our control, I have struggled to deal with it and not see that the relationship is ending. I am realizing how committed he really is and how much he does want to make it work.
I am absolutely afraid to be okay with my decision. Because it hurts. Maybe fear isn't the right word, but it is a scary thing to acknowledge that my life plan is out the window and I am somewhat starting from scratch, and that I am okay with that. I would like to be able to let go of my guilt over the course of time, and I have already started.
A big fear I have is - what kind of person will I be once I finally have the hysterectomy? Will my husband still want me - will I still want him? Will my kids not hate me? Will the pain finally go away? I've been putting the surgery off because of the fear and I just can't put off dealing with the pain anymore. I will have the hysterectomy in the fall so I guess we'll see.
Right now, the over arching fear I have is that this country is going to continue to support hateful, bigoted people and beliefs. There is such a lack of compassion that is permeating so many facets of life. I am truly scared for what will happen after the election, regardless of who wins. The only way to deal with it is to continue to surround myself with open, loving people and to try and stand up for those who are being swept under the rug by the bullies who have emerged.
Apparently, although I didn't think I did, I am afraid of being alone. I wish I had left my husband the second I found out about the lying, and not listened to friends telling me not to act rashly. I think I can be alone and be happy. I don't know how to get there, though.
I love watching YouTube videos of people talking about things they feel passionately about, but I'm scared to do that myself. In the upcoming year I want to believe that my opinions are just as valid as anyone else's, and that putting my voice out there might make other people happy too.
The fear that being myself is being too much. Too ambitious, too assertive, coming on too strong, and not being liked. The constant walking on eggshells and being afraid of asking too much from the people who work for me have been preventing me to achieve what I wanted. I need to lead as myself, from a position of power and accept that power and enroll people in my vision. There is some discomfort that comes with growth and I need to accept that. I also need to be strategic in hiring people that are aligned with my vision and not be afraid that they wouldn't come to work for me. Same goes for my love life. People have to love me, respect me for who I am.
I still feel that fear of being alone. At times, I seem to push the people I love away from me.
Right now, with the educational system the way it is, I'm very afraid my children will miss out on getting the best level of education they can. They are both incredibly bright kids and distance learning is doing them a disservice. Not through any fault of their teachers or schools but just the fact that they can't engage at the same level as they have in the past. I hope they get comfortable with the idea of distance learning and it becomes second nature to them so they don't miss out on the face to face interactions as much. We're going to have to provide a higher level of support of their learning than we ever have. That part is difficult for me, so it requires a lot of digging down deep to provide it. We are incredibly fortunate to have flexible schedules and work so we can support them.
I am fearful of not having it together and having to rely on other people. This has come out a lot especially because my support system has changed and on the one hand, the safe thing is to only rely on ourselves, but that isn't always possible given jobs and kids, etc. I am fearful that I am not providing my kids the best possible and I have to let go of that. My kids are safe and healthy, they most likely will not remember this pandemic but I hope they remember the small things, like the camping trips we took this year, or the family Shabbats we celebrated or running nudie-tuchus in the backyard sprinklers this summer. I have to let go this awful sense of being the perfect parent and perfect employee.
Due to the pandemic, I’ve been working from home, for the last 6 months, and I find that I don’t drive very much, anymore. Yesterday, I drove on I-95, for the first time in a long time. I was genuinely frightened, when trucks were on either side of me. I am planning on driving up to Maryland in December, when my grandson is born. I’ve driven many times to Maryland from Florida. This will be my first time going solo. I need to build up my confidence again in my driving skills.
I think my fear is for the health and safety of my husband. I think it has limited me from living in a feeling of shalom, and seeing my husband as the gift that he is. I cannot control how God will take us back home, and I need to be more relaxed about it. It just takes a lot of prayer.
I couldn’t find a fear proper, so I went and read last year’s answer. And last year too I couldn’t find a fear. I still have anxieties, like for my children’s health, but I think I did a lot to overcome last year‘s desire to overcome the need of recognition at work.
Fear that I'm going to need something that I get rid of. That fear has caused me to save more things than I reasonably will use . Trust that when something is needed it will be available and/or I will have the resources to get whatever I need.
Perhaps one of my biggest fears is that I worry about losing my connections to Aaron's family if I get involved with someone new. I doubt that will really happen, but it is prob one of those unconscious anxieties. I plan on overcoming it by taking risks, getting involved in my new life, and holding on dearly to those who I already love and cherish.
I’m afraid of the warp of the world. Afraid that the virus will grind us down and cause everything to collapse. I’m worried about this country, about the obscenity of a president we have. I honestly don’t know what to do about most of it, other than to vote and to keep hoping.
That I am not smart enough to function in the world. Keeps me from trying and learning new things. Makes me second guess myself and waste a lot of time stressing over it.
Very good question! I learned this week that orthodox communities for tashlich toss away a fear and then also keep a fear. My most recent fear was that "this is as good as it gets" and I know that is complete bullshit. Maybe its bc I feel like I've gotten as far as I have by accident and that I won't be able to replicate that. But in fact, everything else should be easier bc of how far I am right now! It literally can really only get better! I can't go of this fear by being way more future-oriented!!
this past 6 months my fear of abandonment arouse sitting on top of childhood fear of being left by my parents, there's a memory of being left to tantrum by myself in my room. Slowly as I have done cranial sacral with Catharine I have found more ground and my beloved's devotion has helped too and I realize I will not abandon myself but hold the repulsive hurt places close, lovingly.
I have a fear of being my authentic self and getting judged or rejected because of it. It limits me because its scary to let my walls down and show my true self. I don't like to let people in and see my core truth. I hopefully will be able to continue to work on letting those walls down in safe spaces and then bringing my whole self everywhere in the future.
I fear a lot of things, too many things. I don't really have immediate plans to combat my fears because right now, it's just not a priority.
My greatest fear is being ALONE. For most of my life, I've always feared being alone and feeling lonely because of it. That is why I've tolerated so many unhealthy/toxic/and even abusive relationships. That is why I've gone after and even chased after guys who were no good for me. I've also chased after people as "friends" that didn't treat me with the most respect. I've lost myself along the process of trying to "please" those around me for the sake of not being "abandoned." I let someone take advantage of me in so many ways, and I literally had to pay the price for it. It was the most difficult decision I had to make, but I finally had to let him go, walk away, and move on with my life. I deserve better than mistreatment. The only way to let go of this fear is to finally and fully accept myself the way I am. I hope to heal from this fear in the upcoming year.
It's a fear I have had for a long time. I can't get to sleep until I check to make sure everyone is okay in the house. I try to "let it go" but it's not easy yet.
My biggest fear is not being smart enough. It creates anxiety about acheivmenet and makes it harder for me to relax into working on something, as well as managing the frustrations and anxieties that come with any new endeavor. The higher the stakes, like the financial stakes of my current job search and up-skilling, or the personal stakes of doing really meaningful intellectual work or community organizing, the more intense this is.
I don’t know actually my biggest fears were getting divorced and my grandma passing away and now that both have recently happened I’m not sure what my fear is now. If I had to sit and think about it, I think my fear is perhaps not being successful financially? Not being financially secure/independent. Not achieving my goal of having my hostel and farm
I fear that resting on my laurels will limit my success. I often feel that I've already proven myself and don't need to try very hard. I have to constantly push this out of my mind and its hard to remain positive and confident this way but ultimately I feel that this will result in better work and a higher feeling of accomplishment and fulfillment.
I have a fear of confrontation. I’d rather just push it down and see if it goes away. Last year, I get to confront it head on and this year, I need to work hard on continuing to confront it.
my fear is that trump will win the election. it has limited me b/c it takes over my thoughts, my imagination and my energy. if he takes the white house again, i will seriously have to consider -- and find a way to live in another country. I don't think i could stand living another 4 years under this regime.
This is so crazy - but i was always afraid to turn my phone off at night b/c I was nervous someone would call in the middle of the night to tell me my dad was dead. and then i turned my phone off, figuring it was ok - and glenn woke me up to tell me he died early one morning. they had called to tell me in the middle of the night and couldn't get ahold of me. And now, i still have that little fear of turning off my phone at night. but he's dead. so why the fear. it's so fucked up.
I have always been afraid of being truly alone, but #COVID19 has really broken me of that. The longer the lockdown continues, the easier it gets to be alone with myself and actually even enjoy the quietness. It's not that there aren't people to connect with through virtual channels, but going 6 months, and more to come, without any human contact, is something I never expected to get used to. And yet, it's actually pretty comfortable once you do.
I crave security and fear anything that threatens it. I probably have “enough” money, but want a guarantee that I’ll never run low. So many things I want to do, but I don’t want them enough to let go of a lucrative business that sucks the life and energy out of me. I will keep looking this issue in the eye and see if I make any progress.
Fear of change as always but specifically with leaving teaching and particularly during these times. I don’t really know what I’m good at still and even though I think I could do ok in another industry, the learning curve and trying to move my way up is frightening. I plan on doing more mini experiments if I can ever find time for them.
Something I’m surprised I didn’t touch on last year, I fear being read as incompetent and incapable. It has limited me in not speaking up or trusting myself, my knowledge, my ability which could add something valuable. I hope to find some security and feelings of being grounded in the things I have experience and expertise in. Ironically, in relation to last year, leaning into trust in this area.
Fear of losing my strength as I age and therefore alone as a widower just wasting away. I try to overcome it by exercise
Like last year, I carry anticipatory grief, that Dan and Ira and Gem and Ricky will suddenly be dead, and such pieces of life go with them. I tell myself I can be strong and capable and I'll manage to find ways to prosper, yet I cry and cringe. Make every day, every moment the best. Live positively. Help others.
The deep and utter belief that there's no way anyone would want to be with me, that they could possibly find me attractive. The concept is so unimaginable. But I know that is not a true statement - I just need to believe in myself. How do I overcome it? I don't know.
I struggle with my fear of failure on a near constant basis. This afternoon/evening, for example, I attempted to put together a temporary desk for Alex and I to use, and made so many mistakes along the way that I should have done it with him in the first place. I am attempting to cover my far of failure with false bravado, and that leads to even more failure, often. I need to be able to ask for help when I need it, know my own limitations, and honor that people genuinely don't mind being asked for help. Maybe part of this fear is my worry of annoying people into not loving me.
I fear the effect that any further troubles will have on my family’s psyche. They’re fine, doing reasonably well, although I struggle to guide them as I’m disinclined to exert authority over them (odd as it sounds, I wish to grant them their autonomy and help them make sound decisions themselves, to take ownership over their own lives). So what happens when I’m strained too far, and they bear the weight of caring for me? I fear being a burden on anyone more than I fear not being able to bear burdens. I’ve been learning to ask for help, though I hate to do it except when absolutely necessary. And I’m working to simplify and streamline my life.
I do fear that we have fucked the planet and raised a society with a culture of selfishness and hate. I fear that this combination of dis-ease, lack of care and hoarding power means that ordinary people like me have no ability to make the changes we so badly need to survive. I fear that what I am leaving my children is a tragic life of crises and violence. This is not one to let go or overcome. This is one to work with, use the energy of to empower me to keep trying to mitigate at least some of it.
Para no sonar repetitiva con la respuesta que di el año pasado. Este año mencionaré que el tema que me da miedo en este momento de mi vida es no ser independiente económicamente. Este miedo se acentuó como consecuencia de la pandemia. Como ya lo he dicho, los planes a inicios de este año eran renunciar a mi trabajo para 15 días después venir a Alemania a trabajar. Nada de lo anterior ocurrió como lo tenía pensado, y eso me llevo a estar en mi casa haciendo cuarentena sin trabajo durante 3 meses y medio. Aunque aporté con dinero para comida y renta, otra parte era totalmente absorbida por mi abuela y mis tías. Lo que más temía en ese entonces era estar en esa posición durante un tiempo indefinido. Definitivamente no había opciones inmediatas para recuperar mi independencia financiera. La única alternativa era esperar mi viaje a Alemania. Siendo sincera, ese miedo es una de las razones por las que no me gustaría hacer una maestría. Hacer una maestría implicaría que yo solicitara una beca al estado y trabajara para poder complementar la otra parte. Si me visualizo en esa situación, estaría muy estresada y haciendo algo que no me motiva. Planeo dejar ir ese miedo simplemente pensando en otras alternativas que no involucren la ayuda económica de otras personas. Es por eso que ahora estoy procurando ser más racional antes de ocupar mi dinero. No siento que me estoy privando de placeres, lo único que siento es que estoy en un momento de mi vida en que tengo que ser más disciplinada con mis prioridades. La prioridad ahora es ahorrar para poder tener un colchón el siguiente año que me quiero quedar en Alemania. Me siento capaz para poder lograrlo, así como el año pasado pude ahorrar el dinero suficiente para hacer este viaje y a su vez salí, comí y bebí con mis amigos y familia. El balance ya lo conozco, la única diferencia ahora es que aquí las salidas son más caras jaja entonces lo pienso 3 veces antes salir a comer o beber con un desconocido. Encontraré también el balance correcto para conocer gente nueva y ahorrar dinero. Incluso una señora aquí en Marburg me ha sugerido que busque un empleo por las mañanas, ya que las tengo libres.
After two breakups, there remains that lingering fear that my significant other will finally get tired of me and leave for good, esp. since I remain stuck in a midlife crisis with no clear purpose and direction in life. Right now, I just try to get by one day at a time.
being out of work - I've lost my job. although i can survive for a while it badly affects my sense of self worth and confidence keep job hunting, talk to positive people who are good for me & try not to worry try to see it as an opportunity
I'm afraid of not finding my people. Not finding a partner. I've been trying to make more plans with people. I guess I just need to find a better work-life balance. But the thing is: I enjoy being alone. I like my thinking time, my writing time, and my music time. It's honestly just better to wait until I find people who understand that as opposed to compromising parts of myself to have "friends".
I fear that bad things will happen to my children. I must accept that bad things will happen to my children, because bad things happen to everyone.
I have had a fear of teaching large groups, but I am in the process of overcoming it by teaching at HackerU. I am grateful for the pandemic requiring us to teach online - I fell it has helped me refine how I teach, especially in large groups, and I feel that by the time we will be allowed to return to classroom lessons, I will be prepared for it.
Fear of not regaining mobility in knee. Gotta keep at the PT and strive to not re-injure.
Fear is a big thing this year, but I'm not convinced that it's always limiting. There's that quote about fear going around that is about letting it pass through you and beyond you and then only you remain. I'm not afraid of a lot anymore other than the usual-immigration separation from R and baby and others, or not being able to get to family who are sick or dying due to this year being how it is.
I am always afraid that I am unloved, unwanted, unneeded, and not worth seeing or knowing. That I will die alone (which I probably will). That I don't live out my life but fritter it away. I think I am learning to love and be kind to myself, and while I may never have love from someone else (quite likely), I can learn to love, trust, and take care of myself.
So many fears... fear of failure, fear of abandonment/being alone, fear of death, fear of being disconnected from friends and family. On the other hand, I feel more confident in being myself these days, with all the good and evil I know I contain. I just wonder sometimes if I will ever figure out how to be a person in the world, socially/interpersonally.
I'm afraid of disappointing people. It keeps me from doing new or out of the box things and from fully exercising my creativity. I want to find places in my life where I can lean into failure (or the potential for failure) in order to make myself more comfortable with failing in other parts of my life.
Last year I answered, "I too often discount my abilities. I am afraid I am somehow less than what will be expected of me. Each year I work to let this go just a little more." I make progress every year, and there is still work yet.
I am afraid I will make decisions that I will later regret, or that I won't do something the way I'd like to have. It has limited me by giving me anxiety, causing me to be indecisive, and fearing making a decision and also not making one. I want to keep working through this. I'm waaaay better than I used to be, but there are things I still need to work on, like regarding whether to have a child(ren). And decisions about dating.
My fear has now turned to concerns. If I have something that is pressing I am concerned about it being accomplished on or before time and will be concerned until it is demonstrated in the physical world Fears however, no, for The Lord is my Light and my Salvation
I don’t think it’s a fear a worry as my husband turned 70 and remember when I met his father at 70 he looked so old and got his first heart attack so now it’s a worry as heat disease runs in his family. I thought once I retire I will have plenty of time to travel yet I can’t retire yet so it’s a worry if we will have plenty of health years to do those long travels. How to overcome it? Yes keep working and planning for those holidays!
I think my main fears are around not being liked or understood, and mostly I’m pushing through? I try really hard to just be honest and direct with people and prefer vulnerability that is honest (even though it’s scary).
I wish I'd answered this last year - I assume I would've been fearful of unmedicated birthing, which definitely would have been terrifying - but I chose a C-section, and though scary in some ways, it was absolutely the best decision I made about my birthing options. This year, I'm not necessarily "fearful" of not getting pregnant again but I do hope that I can trust my body to repeat a healthy pregnancy when it's time - and maybe, just MAYBE, I can feel better along the way...
I loathe spiders. It makes it hard to spend any significant amount of time outdoors when I'm afraid of one of those eight-legged nasties crawling on me or walking into a web. I have no idea how I'm going to get past this, but it's something I've got to deal with at some point.
My fear of never finding love has subsided somewhat. I had a really lovely month with Max, which reminded me of what it's like to be involved with someone who really likes me and wants to spend time with me. At the same time, I surprised myself during the lockdown with how content I could be by myself, especially as compared to some friends who really struggled with the isolation. I didn't get depressed or bored, and I didn't find it hard to exercise regularly -- I'm proud of that! I do think I've been a bit afraid of pushing myself physically, whether by trying new activities or just increasing the difficulty of things I already do. I'd like to explore that more in the coming year -- by upgrading my bike and by joining the Sanctuaire gym.
Not much limits me not even my fears
I had to think about this one for a long while. Fear in a personal growth sense is hard to identify. I am afraid of the organization I am working for, facing such big challenges. I am afraid of the political climate, the upcoming election and the fallout from it. I am afraid of climate change. How do I overcome this? Understanding that it is fear of the unknown in every case. Understanding that in this very moment I can handle it. Meditation is a invaluable tool in accessing this understanding.
I have been afraid that I will not find another partner in life, a true partner, the kind I now realize I need. I have been afraid that financially I won't be able to thrive, that I'll always be dependent on some one else or some other institution or program. That I will always struggle. I am working on first giving myself the sort of love I seek from another. Looking within at what I really desire to feel fulfilled in life, and how I can be responsible for that first; how to go about gaining that for myself. I am starting a new job and recently took a vacation by myself. I used my credit card because I don't have anything saved for vacation. It was unexpected the motivation I had once I made my plan to take a vacation. I always dreaded filling out applications and looking for work, it's become much more difficult for me the older I've gotten. But I applied for and was offered a job much more quickly this time, and working for a company I respect for a change. I feel that I'm moving in the right direction to overcome these fears.
fear of being alone. it makes me grasp onto family and friends who are far away and have other concerns. coming to terms with the idea that we may grow old alone. alone is not such a bad thing. in fact, it can be rather nice.
I'm scared that I'm going to burn out on this job as I have on others, or that I'm not going to do a good job, or both. I plan to maintain boundaries to avoid burnout and to objectively monitor my performance to assure I'm meeting my goals.
I'm terribly afraid of failing. Of not succeeding in my art, in my career, in finding a romantic partner. So I tend not to try or make excuses to not take risks, even small ones. I'll probably spend a lot of time talking about this with my therapist.
I am afraid in general. Of getting hurt, of taking risks, of a lot of things. But it's buried so deep under bravado and intelligence and as many skills as I can muster to not be vulnerable or afraid that it's ridiculous. The whole iceberg under the water is a simple need for "enoughness". To be enough just as I am. In this next year I plan to try to get back to that baby like state by giving others "enoughness," by shutting off my constant judgement firehose that sprays on everything.
I am afraid letting others down, and also myself. I am going back to counseling to try to work on my issues.
I'm afraid of letting my colleagues and boss down. It limits me because it makes me feel like I can push my family aside while performing well at work, but it's my first real join, and I figure that someday I'll figure out how to balance things better to impress my work colleagues but also support my family.
One fear that I have is that I am going to get hurt by my dad mentally like my mother did. I plan on letting it go by communicating more with my dad and deepening our relationship to where him and I can trust each other and cannot feel any trust issues.
fear of being vulnerable. I've always made sure to take care of myself, expecting no one else would. It has made me very self-reliant, but also lonely and unattached in many ways. I don't know how I will let it go or overcome it. naming it is a start.
I'm afraid I'm a total fraud.
I have a fear of being left or abandoned; a fear of being alone. It means I have often freaked out when partners or friends start to pull away, then accelerating that pull away. I'm working on growing in therapy and the Introduction to Intentional Dating course to let go of/process the trauma that causes this behavior. I have to be patient with this work, but I think with a year, there's a strong chance of success.
My greatest fear is I stay stuck. My fear has contributed to and amplified my stuckness. I cannot seem to get out of my own way and I cannot connect with others to help me get unstuck. How do I let it go or get beyond it or overcome being in the stuck place? I’m not sure. I have to believe things will get better next year as we look at moving away from this place. Maybe it’s simply looking forward to a change that will help motivate me.
I am still working on the same fear of not finishing before my time here ends. But I am continuing to work on completing those things I have started. I have also reevaluated several projects I considered, and ditched a few. Just bundled up the materials and took them to the thrift store. It was a freeing feeling, to be honest. So I am beginning to feel like I may actually overcome this fear one way or another.
My biggest fear these days is the country getting into a civil war. Too many companies are making too much money by manipulating people and polarizing them and it is just getting worse everyday. I honestly fear a civil war. I hope Trump wins but I think that would continue to tear the country. I actually think it would be worse if Biden wins
I have a fear of not being busy enough and also, being too busy. I am reluctant to over extend myself because I want to be able to complete anything I have committed to do. So I hold back on getting involved. I also need some private time to relax and wind down at night. If I'm out and about in the evening, I often find it difficult to relax enough for sleep. And I am no good without a decent night of sleep.
I mean there could be zombies. Or something tragic could happen to someone I love. Or someone I don’t even know. Sometimes shit just sucks. I just want people to be safe, happy and cared for. We could do it. We live in the most advanced time in human history. We have technology, globalization, abundance and yet there are millions who suffer. It just seems so disappointing.
I'm scared of being vulnerable. I keep bring worried about getting hurt. I am planning on finding a therapist to keep working on it. CPE is also helpful.
Abandonement. I definitely am always afraid that maybe this fight is the last one, maybe this is the thing that will make my loved one walk away. It's exhausting for all involved. Working on just trusting that folks aren't going anywhere without warning but my lived experience really says otherwise.
The fear of failure The fear of loss (needing to maintain the status quo in my life) And a little bit the fear of being discovered as a fraud (even though I am not) These cause me considerable anxiety and but also motivate me. I'm not sure what my life would look like without these fears and I am unclear how to overcome them.
I am fearful of others' disapproval - letting others down, disappointing them. So much so, that it sometimes hinders me from being myself and owning my truth. I am afraid of what "they" will think - whoever "they" are. This is ingrained in me from a very young place. The only way I know how to overcome it is to be vigilantly conscious, and try to notice when I'm procrastinating or hesitating, so I can call myself out on it, talk it though with someone else so that it's not a secret, and move through the fear to do it anyway.
I am always afraid of making a mistake. Big mistake or small mistakes - it is very hard for me to accept less than perfection from myself! And yet I hear it read every day “We are not saints. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.” All of my other fears seem to pale before this one.
Interesting, as I woke up today feeling fearful, and I can't remember the dream exactly. It had to do with kids and society & school. I am fearful for the world. It has fragmented in some ways, come together in others. I try to stay positive. With covid-19, people have had more time to be w/ their families. They are not rushing hustling and bustling every minute of the day. They have time to think. Many are able to work from home, but not all. Nursing has become a dangerous occupation. Our President has withdrawn us from about every global organization possible. This makes the world more unsafe. Hate groups are on the rise. Suicide is on the rise. Our environment is receiving a heavy blow as more people in leadership deny climate change even as it is ripping fires thru California and hurricanes where we live. The summers are hotter than normal, 90s 90s 90s every day. We are just now having comfortable days. So my fears are 1) no covid vaccine works, 2) We have the same President and Congressional leadership we had this year, 3) More people I know die from covid or lack of health insurance, 4) Affordable Care Act goes away and people's children with pre-existing conditions lose their medications and die. 5) Immigrants continue to be locked up and lose their children. !! (I plan to let go of these fears through consistent, daily prayer and positive affirmations and social activism. The way Baha'is are socially active is outside of politics. We take social action by building up our communities. My action will involve organizing devotionals and children's classes / youth groups that empower kids and give them tools to work for change and a better world. God be with us all.
OMG, are you in my head? I have so many fears that it would take the time I have left in life to list them all. BUT. The One. I was born to parents who possibly shouldn't have had children. My mother was paranoid-schizophrenic, and she was also bipolar. She refused to take me home from the hospital when I was born, so I lived with my grandmother for a month or so. I went back to my mother when she saw how much my grandmother enjoyed having me. It wasn't a matter of love bringing me home, but probably pressure from my dad and revenge on my grandmother. My sister was born in 1964, when we lived almost 1,000 miles away from the rest of the family. My sister had some health issues (I was 3, my memory on this is fuzzy and filled in by stories from my grandmother) and was a fussy, needy baby. My mother still exhibited mental instability, but I did not sense any animosity towards my sister on her part. I was, however, being physically abused as a result of mom's illness. It seemed then that there was a (deservedly so) emphasis placed on Nancy's health and welfare, and since I was the oldest, I was left to somewhat fend for myself. That seemed to morph into a good child/bad child attitude from my mother. My sister was a precious relic, and I was the bad child who wanted attention and drew limited resources from attention to my sister's needs. It evolved to the point that I was scapegoated by my mother. A lot. If I did it, it was probably bad. My father, who spent lots of time at work, simply accepted what my mother would tell him about me, and I also became the problem child in his mind. As my mother's mental health unraveled, though, I became the person he talked to about their issues. An odd position for an 8-yr old. I never understood how my father could KNOW his wife was mentally ill, and yet believe 100% the lies she told about me. It colored our relationship forever. So, I was painted as a liar. Sometimes I *did* lie, I was trying to save my hide. Sometimes when I spoke the truth, I was told it was a lie. If I pushed back, I was physically punished for daring to defy my father. My father's insistence on seeing me in the light painted by my mother (who he divorced when I was 21, and who died in a homeless shelter when I was 31) continued right up until his death when I was 49. I was viewed with suspicion or, on a good day, bemusedly. I was seen as controlling (and I realize now, I am becoming more controlling in ways that my father was) and disrespectful. The fear is this: that my judgment was never trusted, my actions were suspect or outright wrong, my decisions were wrong, and I am not to be trusted. That was implanted in me as a child and reinforced right up until my father's death. He was lying in a hospital bed, in my home, that I was paying for, eating food I purchased and prepared for him, relying on me for medicines, bathing, bathroom functions, and yet, one day he looked at me asked: "Who told you you could think that?" As if a 49-year old cannot have her own thoughts and decisions. In her own home. Working a full-time job and helping care for her terminally ill father in hours outside that full-time job. I have never felt like a 'real person' making good decisions and fully participating in life. I'm struggling to break out of those feelings. My husband doesn't realize how it's manifesting in our lives, and he doesn't understand how his reactions to my actions are mirroring my father's smothering. My anger blazes up pretty hotly, but I hold it back. Partially because I know the anger is at dad and that history, and because I fear that being all of me, anger and all, will drive my husband from my life. I want to be all of me, even the bad parts. I feel like I need that. I want to work on that, but I have groundwork to lay with the husband. He has to accept that I have some really bad parts of me (maybe not bad, but not sunshiny bright, either) that need to be expressed to be exorcised. And just accepting me with those episodes would go a long way to helping me get to a place in my own mind where I can be everything that I am, not just the parentally acceptable parts of me.
not sure this is a 'fear.' More of an awareness of a possibility. Will this be my last year? Might I have disease? I'm having it checked. And, will I run out of money to the point of having to make unwanted life changes?I am addressing this now. strategizing.
That my ambition and sense of wonder have disappeared. It has felt as though I’m not free to be me. I’m hoping that when I gain clarity over what it is that I want to do it will be overcome.
I'm fearful of not having enough money, with both of us retired and the market taking wild swings. I'm spending less than before. I've eliminated high cost personal maintenance - hair color, mani-pedis and new clothes. But I'm spending more on food and home delivery. Working part-time helps me not worry about this, but the job has dried up, so I may need to revisit cutting back more. I'm really fearful of what has happened to society in the US. I'm afraid we're headed to Civil War. Part of me wants to run away to Canada. I'm on the edge emotionally, hanging by a thread, and I've decided to start taking an antidepressant again. I took one for years to help me cope with stress. I was able to quit it after retirement.
I have never ever been more afraid than I am this year. Covid-19 Pandemic has scared all of us, and me because of my age and other factors. I don't see how or when it will end. I will not be the first in line to get a vaccine that is being rushed through for political gain. I am also worried about the changes in the Supreme court of the United States and the violence we are seeing in our streets.
I am terrified of Trump winning (or more likely stealing) re-election. The first time I ever voted was in 2000. I was eighteen years old. I have kept my jadedness more or less in check over the past two decades, but this autumn (and probably the subsequent winter) will tell me once and for all whether this is a fear I can release.
Fear of being alone. I think it's something that pops up into my head too often. I want to focus on just enjoying life as much as possible!
Fear of disapproval has stifled my voice and held me back from being more honest at work, causing me to take on more than I should and not speak out when I needed support. I quit my job and am starting over at a new one where I can hopefully learn from this lesson and not be afraid to be critical when needed.
I'm afraid out kids will never mend their hurts and reconcile. I plan to continue going inward and doing the deep work on me to be able to move forward, regardless of what happens outside of me.
Fear of alienating people. In my present job I sometimes have to make decisions that people don't like. I don't like it when people don't like me, but I can't let the fear that they won't "like" me stand in the way of making justified and necessary decisions and carrying them out. I don't have to be a jerk about it, I do have to apply rules fairly and figure out how to respect people and communicate adequately with them about decisions, but they do not have to like me.
That the president is re-elected and that officials whose responsibility it is to denounce his racist, sexist, anti-Semitic, ageist, homophobic, illegal, lying, behaviors - and whose responsibility it is to confront his verbal abuse of individuals with disabilities, POWs, peaceful protestersb remain silent. This is not dramatic - his endgame may not be as focused at pre-1941 Germany, but his actions and fear mongering and promoting hatred are on a parallel track. Overcoming it? Press the Free Press to expose every action and every act of silence.
I fear not accomplishing some of the goals I have professionally. I am hoping to speak to my managers this year.
I fear anxiety. I fear that I couldn't handle real pain. I fear the world is in danger. I fear for the health and safety for my child. I fear I won't make the best choices for myself or family. I fear I won't balance life well or show up for my family. I will battle these fears by practicing gratefulness. By doing yoga. Staying focused and grounded. By loving hard.
I'm mostly done with fear. Perhaps it's that the planet is quivering with collective fear. Fear that turns to anger and divisiveness. I'm no longer fearful of not having enough, of insufficiency. I have everything I need. I am safe right now. I have enough of everything in case I do get sick, at least for awhile. I am working more than ever and am enjoying the work immensely. However, I am lonely. Do I fear loneliness? Not really, not today. I'm sad, not afraid.
I am afraid of living the rest of my life without a partner. I've been divorced for 20 years. I never expected that. Although I have met and dated many men through the years, the right man still eludes me.
I have many fears that have been with me my whole life. Most are mortality oriented -- my own and my loved ones.' Up until about the last ten years, it limited me from travel, because between the plane and the unknown, I was sure something terrible was about to happen. I'm don't think it's a fear I will ever be free of, and rather than say I'm "letting it go" or thinking, after all these years, that it can be overcome, it's more accurate to say that I am living with it. Fear and anxiety have been with me my whole life. In a way, they are companions. Medication has been more useful than any other thing I've ever tried -- meditation, biofeedback, therapy, analysis -- they have all contributed to my better well-being over the years, but medication is what made me able to live without crazy OCD, and do all the traveling I've done in the last few years. I'm always stunned when people don't want to try it out of fear they won't be themselves, because I'm still me and I sleep better. I sleep period. I even can sleep too much if you give me half a chance. But enough of that PSA, because the truth is that medication has allowed me to live with my anxiety, so even though I can't say I've "let it go" I've made my peace with it. So I plan to do whatever scary things are necessary in the coming year. I hope some of them are fun, and some of them are successful, and if I'm lucky, some of them are both.
I am afraid of the present governemnt.
So...so many. Hard to pick the one. I guess my biggest fear is fear of rejection. It limits me every day. Sometimes I can let it go by giving myself "a talking to" and just sucking it up and begin making the plans and calling people and dealing with the feelings that come with it. I guess it limits me in that I feel intense bouts of loneliness because of it.
The fear of completion is like the fear of failure. I need to move past and complete my story.
I have so many fears. I’m afraid of buying my condo. I’m afraid of allowing Andrew to move back in with me. I’m afraid of unforeseen unfortunate events happening. I’m trying to understand that I am loved and worthy of all of my dreams coming true and I’m meant to live an authentic, joyful life.
I am afraid of Marv's rage and then miss out on doing things. I will let go of it by reminding myself that what I want is mroe important and the rages are temporary. I am also afraid of failing and won't try things. So I need to push myself to try things and be willing to fail.
I have feared to speak up for myself, I have feared I cannot stand on my own, emotionally and financially. Now I will prove myself I am able to create wealth. To manifest in a material way.
So I think a big joke I’ve had in the last year was how I blew up my career to go back to school. PhD work is hard. It’s not like being a therapist. There are stats and measuring constructs and validating measurements. It’s so different than I’ve ever had to think, I got headaches for a while. But I knew I didn’t want to quit. This fear of being criticized and not knowing what I’m doing has been met with grace and assistance. It’s still hard to fathom knowing enough to conduct my own research and mentor others, but year 2 is better than year 1. Being single again has required me to evaluate the lies have believed how I’m not worthy. I’ve also decided to celebrate it and not hide it. I’m getting my solo photos in two weeks. I’m celebrating who I am, without a man.
My anxieties around travel have felt really limiting and awful. Honestly, though, they have paled this year in comparison to how big the problems of the world have felt. And the fact that it is *all* about breathing is tough-- COVID-19, the wildfires, and the Black Lives Matter movement. It truly feels suffocating all the time. And while normally I write these notes and think about how far I will have come in a year, that doesn't feel like it will be the case next year. I worry that not being able to breathe will still feel really immediate and familiar. I am trying to work on it through hypnotism/meditation... but I suspect a psychiatric solution may prove necessary.
Fear... hmmm... it comes in many forms - some minor, others greater. I fear that I won't "leave a mark" on the music world as great as I hope. I think the only way it's limited me is by causing me to do nothing rather than something at times in my life. The only way I've found to let it go or overcome it, is to forge a plan to do the work and not stop working the plan.
I still fear isolation as we age and how age and time has impacted our health --- physically and mentally. I also fear that our great nation is being destroyed from within with help from foreign puppet masters. I hope to continue to fight procrastination on my health.
I fear that I might fail starting a business. Its something I know every entrepreneur has contemplated but it has kept me from starting something because how it may feel if things don't work out. However, I've realized more recently that its irrational to think that way. If anything, starting something new with a mission to better my communities and do something to improve, support, and/or enhance the world in a positive way can't be a failure even if things don't work out. I'll have learned something and be able to use that knowledge for other projects or roles I have in the future. That's what I'm trying to overcome now so I can start and see where it leads me in a year!
Dating. I guess I fear that type of intimacy. I fear what heartbreak would do to me. I fear that nobody can actually love me because I'm too disgusting. I fear rejection in that capacity. With the pandemic, it's pretty easy to shy away from that fear. Somewhat enables it, actually. So I guess I don't have a plan to overcome it. I wish I did.
One fear I have is of death and talking about death and losing my parents. I have been more open this year in sharing thoughts about dying, talking about it openly with friends and family and visiting the cemetery (where two close friends are buried). I plan to buy our own plots this year and continue to live every day with meaning and kavanah so that I remember it's about how we live, not how we die.
That Trump will win again and covid 19 won’t go away soon.
I have a couple fears. This year more than ever I have thought on my mortality. Approaching new things I assess them in terms of harm. As in the past, fear of rejection by those I care about sometimes keeps me from speaking up or it causes me to edit my thoughts. I am hoping that old age will release me from this fear.
I feel my body is failing me. I plan to increase my efforts via P.T., stretching and training.
I fear for the future of the United States but that fear has not "limited" me in ways that I can identify. I cannot "let it go"—it's important to be alert to the negativity which is damaging, killing, blind.
I fear what could happen to me and the people I love as a result of COVID-19. I don’t know if this fear will fully let go until there is an effective vaccine that I can take. Until then, I will try to keep myself safe while also having a life that is worth living.
My greatest fear has always been that I am not enough ... not strong enough, good enough, active enough, supportive enough. To finally let it go, I need to fully accept myself as who I am, including my limitations, and trust that in the scope of the larger universe, it will be enough.
Still, fear of success and a fear of change or maybe that's the commitment? I plan on taking more risks with myself and my ideas. Of simply taking action to get it done rather than pretending I will one day. Hopefully, by next year, I will be reading this & things will have definitively changed.
That the govt is going to become fascist and the world is going to be destroyed to where life can’t be supported.
My greatest fear is that one of my family will get a serious case of covid-19. I don't want them to suffer. I don't want them to be alone as they suffer or worse. I want to be able to comfort them and hold them if they must suffer. It has kept me from being able to go to sleep at night. I start to pray about it and it then becomes forefront in my mind, so I've had to pray earlier in the day. I hope and pray there will be a SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN SAFE vaccine in the coming year that we all can take.
I have no limiting fear. Everything is left in the hands of HaShem
It seems my fears & anxieties of a general nature have gotten worse with the political climate we are in. I just practice my anti-anxiety technique which is an acronym for the word AWARE: Acceptance, Watch & Wait, Actions to take, not to end the anxiety which will end on its own but rather, actions to make me feel better when I'm feeling bad, Repeat, & then the anxiety finally Ends.
Aside from my fear of getting what I really want, I think the fear of running out of money has always limited both my spending and my enjoyment of things I do spend money on. Armed with the new insights pointed out my my dear friend Joann, I will be planning some strategies to enjoy whatever money I do ultimately inherit. I'm going to be making a list to start with.
I am fearfful of everything, oerly stressed, highly insecure. I am nothing but fear. The fear includes fear of seeking out jobs and relationships. There is no plan to let it go. I'm possessed of it for the rest of my life; time's up for a change. It's much too late. Had I appreciated the problem when younger, I'd have made some changes, ensuring that as much of my life would be lived within the limits as possible which would, at least, reduce the stress of a highly limited life of frustration.
I am afraid of being alone. I think "overcoming it" might take a number of paths, including working on trying to find a relationship. I finally felt ready, just before the pandemic, and now it all feels on hold. It definitely flows in with my fear of failure, but I'm definitely getting more comfortable with taking more chances. Applying to grad school the other day was a huge fear of mine that I just kind of pushed my way through. Once I started telling people I was doing it, I had that external excitement that helped me do it.
That I will not have enough money or outlive my money due to market crash. Limits me from using money for my enjoyment. Maybe create different pockets of money in different more safe investments. Do more travel when pandemic allows.
A fear I have is wearing my Black Lives Matter t-shirt. It limits me because I'm not in integrity. I'm ashamed of my fear. I'm scared of not knowing what to say if I get a come-back. Dirty looks I can handle, I've gotten those with my Black Lives Matter bag, but somehow the t-shirt makes me feel exposed. I am so ashamed. I think of all the Black people who are exposed everyday just by being who they are, their lives in constant danger. Our country has decided that it's ok for police to shoot you in your own home -- if you're a Black person. I am so scared. That is something I have realized this year. I am scared of people. I need to face fear. Maybe I'll put on my t-shirt now and walk down to the store.
I'm afraid that I'm already a failure. I've spent 18 months without being fully employed and I feel rudderless. I know I want to pursue immigration policy but I don't know how. I'm trying to move towards proactively addressing all of this but every time I do it feels like the world implodes again and work is hard just getting through the day. After that I'm drained and just desperate for a long nap. This year has made it really hard to hold on to my desire to pursue public service.
fear that I'm unlovable. and dumb. Neither of which is true. I'm going to keep reminding myself of this!
I fear that America may not be our forever home and that our democracy and safety are thus in grave peril. The 2020 election is 6 weeks away. RBG just died and Trump is going to get away with replacing her with a right wing nut who wants us to live in the Handmaids Tale. Trump is threatening not to leave office if he looses the election. More Americans have died of COVID than anywhere else in the world. These are not signs of a healthy democracy. I think it would be irresponsible of me to let these fears go, but I hope to overcome them by dedicating myself to democracy promotion and coming up with real backup plans should the 2020 election be another step towards the end American democracy.
I have a fear of getting things fixed, that I'll hire the wrong person who will make it worse. So I procrastinate. This year I will try to remember to eat the frog first.
A fear that my aging and slowing body means I’m actively dying; how it limits me is that it makes me anxious and tired, and feeling unimportant to myself, others, my world.
I've always been afraid to fly, and therefore have not traveled the world as much as some people. It's never really bothered me until now, when travel out of the country is banned. Who knows when we will be able to travel again? It makes me regret that I was too afraid to have these adventures earlier in my life. And now I can't. I know I will still be scared to fly, but I hope I will be more open to facing that fear and seeing more of the world once the pandemic is over.
I fear the future. I fear being alone and not having a safe place to call my own. I fear being honeless and without friends and family. I fear dying alone
I feel coming off as stupid and bringing forth bad ideas. It has lead me to be too quiet at work and come off as stand-offish and shy. In the coming year, I want to be more confident in what I have to say and be vulnerable enough to put my ideas forward, and recognize that rejection of my ideas is not necessarily a judgment of my worth.
I'm afraid of quitting my job. It has limited me because I've been mostly unhappy at work for 5 years: half the time I've been at this company. That's not healthy. It has worn me down. Shown me a side of myself I don't like. Shown that side to other people. I will not be in that job this time next year; or if I am, I will have changed. But I think I have to quit. I'm afraid that I won't find other companies to be as good. But then this company has trundled off the pages of my good books. It is no longer the company I wish to keep. My relationship with it has soured. I do not want to include some of its employees in my average (there's a theory that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with: I want to change who those five people are). I could just let it go now: resign and hope that I fall on my feet or at least sustain an income with freelance work until I find my next job. Or I could wait for a more stable transition and have the new job lined up. There's a part of me that isn't worried about being able to earn enough from freelance work. My attitude towards freelance work would change if that was my only source of income. I also wonder if I need a more extreme change of direction in my career. I've thought about using the university careers service to help me think this through. But I'm also waiting to hear from a job application I did in June, that I invested a lot of time and energy and thought into. I don't want to move on from that yet until I get a definitive answer one way or another about whether there's a place for me in this new company: if we are right for each other.
I have been afraid to reduce my schedule and thereby reduce my income. I have worked less during the pandemic and have still maintained a healthy balance in my checkbook. I want to remember that.
I'm afraid of what's going to happen between now and January 20. I'm concerned about what Trump and Attorney General Barr will say, and what Trump's supporters will do, both to swing the election in his favor and to contest the election if he loses, including trying to disenfranchise Democratic voters. I'm concerned about the increase in misinformation and the increase in the people who believe it. Rather than limiting me, it's encouraging me to do more to help get out the vote.
I am afraid of confrontation, and also of making other people unhappy. It's something I'm working on (still), trying to figure out how to disagree, how to allow my own needs take on the same level of importance as others'. Avoiding confrontation limits me in so many ways - I avoid responsibility, sometimes, so that I don't have to displease others. It's true I have, in my life, delivered bad news, or stood up for myself and my needs, or the needs of the situation, as when I was president, or a project manager, or a boss...or a parent! But I still struggle with it. Not sure I can let it go, because I don't want to be that weak, but I also want to accept myself and not be so self-critical that I fold up and wither. So I guess I'll keep working on it.
Fear of being old and infirm, fear of being abandoned, alone in older years, powerless. Almost dying helped. Put a lot in perspective. Tho I’ve been having toms of nightmares, I think I am moving forward. It’s weird my awake time feels fine, my sleep stressed. But it’s all about powerlessness and not being heard. The doctors didn’t hear me when I said I was really sick. . . No one did, I almost died, pulled myself out. And here I am again. .
Fear of not being able to do something really well the first time I try it. It's kept me from trying new things many times in my life. I'm going to try and let go of that toxic perfectionism this year.
Same as last year: that I am not enough or good enough. It limits me by causing me to burrow into preparing details rather than looking at the big picture. It also keeps me from taking on new things because I feel overwhelmed by what is on my plate. Also keeps me from enjoying life and nurturing relationships. Continuing to work on this.
I have fear of change, meeting people and not getting what I want. I have been stagnated. I have no idea how to change.
Robert Reich says the U.S. is no longer a democracy. It's now an oligarchy. I fear that Trump could be re-elected, that we won't flip the Senate, and that the U.S. Supreme Court will be in the hands of ultra-conservatives for generations to come. I will continue to volunteer for the causes in which I believe, especially social, racial, and climate justice.
I fear losing my memories - getting Alzheimer's. That's a real fear since Daddy had it. So any memory loss I experience freaks me out! Not sure I can let it go, but I'm ever diligent to keep my mind active. Nightmare de jour: losing the car in a parking lot...
Of course I fear catching Covid-19 most of all right now. But I also worry that in my concern over that I will overlook other health issues I need to take care of in a timely manner. I need to keep things in perspective, not let my imagination take over and get the real healthcare I need.
I fear failure. I fear not making tenure. I fear being out of my individual comfort zone--even if I'm able to break out of that zone elsewhere
Somehow the pandemic has made me so worried about so many things that I focus less on something happening to Steven, even as he becomes more and more the center of my happiness. While it is still there, it does not keep me from enjoying wonderful moments with him, which it used to do. I think fear of something happening to any of my family has become so pervasive for all of us that I just really revel in the. moments I have with them, even more than I did before.
My fear is the very real one that Mum will succumb to her illness. The fact she has made it this far is a true miracle. There is no situation in which I could lose her and it not be a devastating experience. But what keeps me up at night is not the effect losing her will have on me, but what it'll do to my sister. I'm terrified I won't be able to help her. May Mum live to be 120 years old.
I'm not afraid of anything. I worry a lot. I believe I have answered this same way every year in the past. I do fear that there are so many idiots in this world who aren't willing to do what it takes to rescue the planet that it will become unlivable in my daughter's lifetime and that isn't fair to her or any child living now. We owe it to them to fix this mess that humans have created. There are too many people, though that either don't believe it's a problem or won't sacrifice the conveniences of modern life like plastic and disposable items or stop funding fossil fuels or switching to better ways of life to make it happen. I personally don't do enough and I feel like I do more than the average person.
Fear? I fear that my life has been meaningless, that the students I taught only tolerated me, that I do not sing as well as I think I do, that my friends merely pity me. Ah, but I don't usually think that or feel that. Other times, I know the reverse is true: that I have affected the lives of my students, at least helped them to appreciate plants, have skills to grow them, have some understanding of our earth and its systems. I believe that I do sing well and I believe that people appreciate my efforts to improve the music at my church. Who knows which is true? Probably the latter, but perhaps a bit of the first paragraph. After all, given the ultimate end of the earth in about 5 1/2 billion years, it's all meaningless........... Bleak? I overcome my fears by believing that what I do, each action, each deed, each motion exists as its self. Each is a chance to do good, to build, to create, and each is a chance to screw up. We are all flawed, but we all are unique universes unto our selves. It's all relative............ :-)
A fear that I’ve had for awhile is of not spending enough time with my grandparents and even my parents as they get older and I’m no longer a kid. It scares me so much when I think of how old my parents and grandparents were when I was born versus how old they are now because it makes me feel like the time is flying by – we only have one life. I want to take advantage of having so many family members in my life who love me and have always been so supportive. Sometimes when I’m grumpy or get frustrated, I lash out at my parents when they don’t deserve it. Sometimes I tell myself I don’t have time to talk on the phone when Gala calls me. I hope that this coming year, I will remember that life is fleeting and that I’m so lucky to have the family that I do. I plan on being as loving and understanding as possible with my family and take every opportunity to spend quality time together.
I can't think of any fears I have that are limiting. I'm afraid of dementia, which my father had but my mother did not, but there's nothing in that to limit me.
I don't know if this is fear but my feelings that I am not creative keep me from attempting creative endeavors. I would like to be done with that limiting belief.
I sometimes fear the repercussions to my own health and options while living in a dumbed down collective consciousness that is so prone to manipulation by corporate and private people of power’s greed. E.g. all the “science” around covid and the ridiculous social mandates put out by supposed health entities. E.g. potential mandatory vaccination, etc. I don’t plan on “overcoming” the fear because fear naturally drops of when I relax. We get what we deserve, period.
I had a fear of failing the Teas exam in June . So I decided to wait until October this year to take it and put fear aside. Because I really want to become a nurse and I’m not going to let that stop me. I’m going to take my test and pass and get accepted in the nursing program.
My fear of intimacy with Karen and my social anxiety keep me from deepening my current relationships and forming new ones. I think the social anxiety is improving with my going to art events with Karen, but I plan to keep pushing through my self doubts and insecurities.
I’m afraid of not being able to be successful at the next level of my job and I’m working on following directions, not over working (which causes mistakes and ruins my attitude and mood and isn’t sustainable) and continuing to seek support around imposter syndrome.
Fear of rejection and abandonment. I will have to reflect further to think of the limitations this fear presents. I plan to overcome this by using positive self talk/rejecting negative self-talk, reminding myself of my worth and continue to look for meaning and the learning opportunities in life. I will overcome it by speaking my mind.
Ahahahahaha! Ahahahahahahahahaaaaaa! Ok, I can breathe again... Bipolar and anxiety, and cheonic pain, together create a fear of basically everything. Even moving is scary. So I don't know I need help to do anything to work this stuff out so I guess step 1 is wait till after we move then request a billion referrals - that's the plan, anyway. Pain clinic, psychiatry, therapy, and go back to the gender clinic maybe. I guess agoraphobia and social anxiety and the fear if being noticed/looked at are the ones that fuck my daily life up the most. Some combo of meds, therapy and who knows what else is needed to start dealing with those. Hopefully next year I'll be able to come here and say I'm less crippled (mentally and physically, heh) than I am right now
I realized this year that over time I had bought into some lies from the enemy. Lies that I was too old, lies that my body was broken. I believe that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I know that all the days ordained for me were written before even one of them came to be. I believe that my body is His temple, a temple of the Holy Spirit, whom I have received from God. I intend to honor God with my body. I intend to do whatever I can to be the most healthy version of myself for the two sons I've been praying for.
I fear Nazis and zealots. I fear the erosion of kindness. I fear for our democracy. Due to my age and health I have not been on the front lines as I once would have been. I have been careful in my conversations with family members - some lines can't be undrawn, and I am still hopeful they will never be drawn. I am preparing myself for quiet, steady passive resistance because I feel that if the worst comes, that is how I can be most effective.
In the aftermath of my stepson's suicide, my husband and I both feel confronted by our mortality. I worry about who will help us out as we age. This is limiting because it makes me pessimistic, and I can't afford to waste time on that. There's nothing to do but keep moving forward as best we can. I also dread being in social situations where topics of parenting and children come up. It was already sensitive for me because I couldn't have children biologically, and now it's even worse. This can limit our ability to enjoy socializing, though we do have many friends who chose not to have children, so we're not bombarded with it constantly. This is another thing that can't be avoided entirely, so we just have to learn to live with it.
With my cancer having metastasized, I am terrified of dying. I don't want to leave my son alone before he graduates college. I'd like to last longer than that. I don't want to be in pain. I don't to suffer. I keep pushing the thought away but it creeps back and frightens me. I just keep going and hope to get a job and then I won't think about as much.
I've been afraid to death of being disliked. Being thought of as dumb. Being thought of as weak. Being thought of as ugly. Being thought of as fat. Being thought of as incompetent. I've been afraid of not having money, of being seen as someone who doesn't have money, of not knowing what people who have money do. My fear of other peoples' opinions has been a, if not the, guiding force in my life. And it's not serving me. I plan to thank it for what it's done for me in the past, and let it go, as I have control now.
I think the biggest fear affecting me right now is screwing up as a parent. Of course that's what's led to the big parenting screw up I had recently...
My biggest fear is that I am not good enough, lovable enough, talented enough, good looking enough. I feel like I am always fearfully aware of all the things I am a failure at. I have been studying the stoics over the Pandemic, and I have found great strength in working not on the exteriors of life, but the interiors. How to be a person of integrity, i think that's how I plan to overcome these fears. It's not about not being good enough for others, but doing the best you can for myself.
I have to say, I've really conquered a lot of fears! I'm not afraid of rejection anymore, so much so that I'm writing comedy with the hopes of getting on stage. I am a single parent protecting my child so there's no room for fear! I am woman, hear me ROAR!
My greatest fear right now is that our country is turning into something akin to Nazi Germany with a fascist dictator who has no plan to give up the White House even if he is not elected in November. With all the hatred and divisiveness his administration has fomented, I don't feel so safe anymore. It feels like I could be in peril because I am not a White Christian conservative, but a Jew. Even if he doesn't target the Jews, he certainly has targeted other non-Christians as well as mocking disabled people, ethnic minorities, etc. The pattern is the same as pre WWII Germany. We are losing our country to this madman who doesn't recognize the truth when it smacks him in the face. I fear for my safety as well as the safety of my family. I keep vacillating between thoughts of moving to another country and thoughts of, "oh well, it really won't happen here." But it can. How did we ever allow this mentally unstable man gain such control? I am really scared.
Not being liked (by anyone).
Really, exact same answer as last year. I think I will ease some of me fears of being alone in a time of crisis by getting the new Apple Watch! I hate that I am replacing human, personal contact with an object, but that is the reality of my life. Ugh!!!
I'm afraid of everything. I'm afraid to leave the house at the moment because of the Pandemic. Not leaving the house has made me afraid that my immune system will over react and that I will end up with more allergies like when my OCD was bad. In the past I was just afraid of being a failure and being unhappy to the point where I never tried. Now I have this on top of that.
I have a fear that I'm romantically unlovable. I have a fear that I'm not enough, that nothing I do is enough, so any steps I take in my career or anything I build won't be perfect enough. I fear that if people truly saw all the ugly, shameful parts of me, they would leave me. I fear that no man will stay, not unless I keep him there. I hope to let this go by exploring my limiting beliefs & finding air and connection in myself.
I try not to live by fear, but I do have concerns and am realistic about some things being under my control or influence and others being part of the randomness of life. I am afraid of losing my family members or friends, or my marriage, and how that would impact my life. Currently I am reluctant to travel due to COVID. I fear losing my home to fire, so I have an emergency backpack by my bed and in the car at all times. I don't want to get seriously ill or injured or maimed. How do I deal with these concerns? By making decent choices, by maintaining connections, and by trying to keep perspective. We are only in charge of so many things in life and our time is finite. I try to be grateful, I let people know I care about them, and I keep looking for the rainbows after storms and the sunshine after darkness.
Oh, man. My biggest fear is that Trump wins this election or steals it and that American democracy is dead, the planet is doomed to spiral into endless climate change, the people seethe with hate and bigotry and we sink deeper into this COVID pandemic with no way out. How's that? These fears don't limit me, though: they make me stronger. They are fuel. I'm going to fight that happening with everything I have.
On a macro level, my biggest fear is that the US will be a semi- or even fully fascist state by this time next year. This limits me in that I currently cannot imagine a safe future here for me and, more importantly, my daughter. Letting go of this fear: I don't think I can, at least not until after the election, I hope. But even a Biden win is just kicking the can down the road. Overcoming this fear: leaving the country seems to be the only way there. I don't think I can feel safe here again. The last four years have taken the mask of pretend decency off of a frightening number of people, and they won't suddenly become humane again with a different president.
Fear of failure, letting my family down letting my boss down, letting my staff down. I still go to therapy. Therapy has been a godsend. I wish I had started it sooner
Fear of this all falling apart. The country, the democracy. I grew up reading dystopian novels, and always worried, considering how the states have been moving weirdly right in certain ways for a while now...and here we are in a very weird space, and I do not know if I have the strength to navigate whatever this new world will be.
Since COVID 19 I started not wanting to go places. It felt strange driving places and I was nervous about going inside, seeing relatives etc. I guess I will overcome my fear when the pandemic rubs its course and people stop dying off.
Fear of failure. Because I'm afraid to fail. I'm afraid to make any promises to myself or to others. So I do not commit to anything and of course nothing comes out.
My fear is I'm not good enough. When tour guiding fell through this year, I couldn't find another job that interests me or that I'm qualified for. It was a huge sense of failure and uncertainty for me. It threw off everything. Moving to the merlog as well feels like a job that's totally under me. I use the past tense, even though I'm still at a loss for a supplemental income or plan b because I stopped looking. I understand and submit to this being a period of time. With all the uncertainty, this is not the time to look for a new job. I feel it's the right time to be committed to my family and the girls and be flexible. And when the time comes I'll find something else. But I was so negative and down on myself that I'm simply not good enough. Letting it go feels SO incredibly good and it lets in space for me to be present for the girls and Tom and I a way better mood.
That 45 will win the election. The election will determine my next steps.
Doing it - whatever “it” means at any given moment - wrong. My dad used to say, “Now there’s a right way and there’s a wrong way....” He wouldn’t finish the sentence; I always assumed he meant that I was wrong. My answer to #5 is appropriate here.
Getting back in public. Going to a play or a concert. Attending in person services. Following the science and being patient.
I fear whatever the fuck comes after this election in like 6 weeks. I fear the lack of belief in science. I fear all Americans who put their own individualistic bullshit wants and desires above those of the greater good. These things are all things I personally have almost no control over and therefore it’s hard to let it go. I wouldn’t say I’m limited by these fears per say, but at the same time it’s almost impossible to let these fears go or overcome these fears because the news that these fears stem from is so prevalent and ever-present. By voting, emailing and calling senators, encouraging everyone I know to vote - that’s all I can really do right now. And just hope that our democracy is strong enough to survive this.
I am afraid someone I love or I will catch COVID. It has limited me in the same way it's limited millions of others---keeping me away from my loved ones and friends, limiting our travel, changing our lives. I don't plan on letting it go, I plan on coping with it.
I have a fear that our country will come apart during and after the election. I don't have a clue how I will let go of that fear. I am praying every day that Biden wins the election. I don't know what will happen if Trump wins again.
I'm still worried about my husband's health, as he is in an elevated risk group. My current fear, though, is that I will not be able to overcome my apparent paralysis about moving forward with projects. I either over-analyze them to death, or get frustrated with lack of progress, or procrastinate until I'm out of time. How will I do this? No idea.
I am still afraid of relying on other people. Knowing where I come from, I don't ever want to put myself in a position where people feel entitled to call in a debt over any part of me they want to. I've worked so hard to build up my financial stability, so that my life could completely fall apart at any moment and I could manage it on my own. I've gotten used to the idea that I am my only safety net - and even though I know I do have people who would help, I don't think I could bring myself to ask for it. But at the same time, living with A, M & C has given me a new outlook on what it means to have a family and to be in community with the people around me. They cook, I cook. They help me out, I help them out, it's reciprocal. It's nice to care. It's nice to be cared for. I'm trying to hold onto that.
I’m afraid of my aging body breaking down — my vision, my arthritic joints. I’m sewing and reading constantly - and very grateful that I still can. I really should exercise more . . .
I feel that if DT were to be re-elected, democracy itself will go out the window. People may say I am just being paranoid but he and the republicans have destroyed this country to bend it to their will.
Failure. Change. If I don't start something, nothing has to change, and I can't fail at it. It's a win/win proposition when those are two of your greatest fears. Passion Planner says, "It doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to start." One foot in front of the other. It just has to start. That's where I'm trying to go so that I can overcome these twin fears.
My greatest fear is my own inadequacy. I'm working on becoming a better, and for the first time in quite awhile, I believe I'll get there. With the surplus of time provided by sequestration I've begun the spade work necessary to change. I endeavor to be 10 percent better than I was last year. I'll begin by devoting time at the local food bank.
I fear being abandoned and being left alone in the world. I fear dying alone and poor with no one around me. I am always working on this and will continue to work on this. I don't know that we 100% overcome any of our issue, I think we keep doing all we can to evolve. With regard to the dying poor...I am working on my financial picture right now.
I don't have "a fear" per se. I'm afraid of venomous spiders bees and other flying, stinging insects, because interactions with those creatures have been quite negative and life threatening. I don't let this fear limit me, but I am extremely careful when I'm in their environment.
My main fear is not being enough. Not being enough for myself, for my family, or for other people. I think it will be a constant lifelong battle to let this fear go. I know the truth logically, but internalizing it is difficult. How do I show up daily and trust that I am enough, regardless of whether I do a lot or do nothing, regardless of whether I am "good" or "not good," regardless of what anyone else thinks? I have to remind myself every day, and that is okay. I am trying my best and that is all I can do.
I think it's common for almost everyone, but fear of change. For a decent amount of time now I've been less than thrilled with some aspects of my job. But at the same time, I'm comfortable with everything that goes on there. I also have a fair amount of leeway and freedom within how I do my job. Part of this is because I am quite good at what I do, and very knowledgeable with many aspects of our company. Another part of this is that I really don't give a shit anymore. To overcome this, I just need to get off my ass and make a decision about work. Honestly, if I'm still in the exact same position a year from now, I think I'll consider this a failure on my behalf.
Fear of getting coronavirus, fear of police brutality, fear of abuse. These fears have limited my ability to seek out interpersonal connections and meet my social, interpersonal, and community needs. I also fear being alone, never finding a Jewish community again, never feeling like I can belong without sacrificing my morals and principles. Not sure what I can do about it, considering the pandemic is real, police brutality is real, and abuse is happening to many people in the world. In terms of overcoming these limitations of modern life, I have been thinking about how to meet these needs within current legal restrictions where I live and exploring options for change in the future.
fear of failure , fear of being wrong - - has led me to doing nothing. have started to tell myself do it anyway, if it turns out to be wrong switch to doing something different.
I've always been afraid of being left alone. Loneliness, abandonment and rejection are things I always have struggled with, and because of that I've restrained myself from making friends or from letting people get into my life. I would like to have more friends, or maybe a girlfriend by this time next year. The only way to battle through loneliness is by surrounding yourself with the appropriate kind of people.
I have let my fear of discomfort and open conflict slow down my progress on my divorce. I have tried to keep my discomfort to a manageable level and because of that I have lived in a lower level of discomfort but for a longer time. It ultimately doesn’t help, and I can see that it has negative effects on me and the people who love me. I am leaning harder into taking action and will continue doing that in the coming year, and focus on what will be available to me after I cross the hot coals.
I fear change. It’s limiting my ability to step outside of my comfort zone. I plan to do at least one thing that scares me everyday.
Having a nice, simple, warm family was always my ultimate goal. I always felt comfortable just being home, but lately I've been developping some fomo. Scratch that. It's not really a fear. I don't really care about missing something interesting, I'm just tired of always being home. Inside these walls, everything always is the same. I play with my son. My husband plays games or watches tv. We fight about chores and what we'll eat. If we go out, there are not only other people to talk to, we also talk more with each other because there are no screens to distract us and Robbe asks less of our attention (he is more enjoyable when he has a change of scenery and when other people spend time with him). Going out - anywhere, really - is so beneficial to our relationship but I feel like my husband doesn't feel the same way. He will go out with me, but he'll never show initiative. It makes me feel like my needs are a burden to him. It's not fear of missing out. It's rather a fear of slipping into a boring life, a predicitable marriage. I'm definitely not living my life to the fullest.
I have a fear of relaxing. I'm afraid that physical rest, watching a movie in the daytime, not getting out of the house each day to do something constructive is somehow (at best) a waste of time or (at worst) dangerous. If I feel extraordinarily tired, I fear that I have some type of illness or that I'm just plain getting old. I don't plan on overcoming this fear, but I would like to work towards that. I frequently use alcohol at night in order to manage my discomfort with relaxing. Alcohol forces me into a state of relaxation. As mentioned, I would like to reduce reliance on that, but I still feel some substance would help... so enter Xanax. I use it some, but very little. I can increase dosage. I can also wind down more slowly before the sudden B. Right now, it's like I'm on the run and suddenly STOP around 7:00 or 7:30. I can begin winding down activities a bit more slowly in order to feel more relaxed at B time (of course teaching nights are an exception). I can include some self-indulgent, wind down rituals, things I might not find time for in the course of a day--facial, pedi, stretching. I'm also thinking that dinner is a nice ritual. I don't really do meals per se, but some semblance of a sit down, food-related thing could be part of wind-down. Daytime is much easier to manage. I have a reasonable pace of activity and reasonable expectations of what I can accomplish. The only days that can be difficult are non-work days. I push myself to do household tasks and errands, but rarely just relax or do activities that are non-productive. It's not horrible, but I would like to improve there. I would like to play music in the house more frequently, maybe while working on a puzzle or cooking. Just once every now and then. More than that would be too much for me.
Not being good enough. This is related to my answer in previous years, fear of failure. I plan on letting it go through meditation, which helps reduce the stress and anxiety that this fear generates, which in turn reduces feelings of inadequacy. Interrupting this cycle is critical to living in freedom from this fear.
As we age, I have an intermittent fear about something having to one or both of us in the near future. It's especially concerning given my wife's constant coughing and her unwillingness to stop smoking even after all our grandkids have tried to convince her to stop. I'm focused on managing my health and that's another key reason to drop some excess weight. Also need to continue spending as much time as possible with the grandkids.
We really only have one fear which is caring for Jared, our disabled son who lives with us, as we get older. Let’s face it, I’m 71 and Sandi is 70 (Jared will be 41 soon) and time is relentless. He actually keeps us young I think, maybe because he’s like a baby in every way and triggers some hormones to keep us youthful and energetic. Maybe we’re lucky. Just hope his bothers step up when the time comes. Financially he should be set. Happy to be still working/consulting not touching our savings.
I have a lot of social fear. Not so much fear of short, impersonal interactions, but fear of making friends. I'm afraid of opening myself up to someone and being rejected or acting like I'm close with a person and finding out they don't feel the same. I'm not exactly sure how to work on this, but I think I just need to keep taking risks and seeing that they work out okay. Because that's the same answer I wrote last year, I'll add that I'm afraid of taking risks when it comes to activism. I contacted a couple of elected officials last spring, and it felt empowering, but I'm still not doing as much protesting or phone banking as I'd like to, partially out of fear. I think here, too, I simply need to jump in and trust that it'll be okay.
I am afraid if I am really seen, I will not be lovable. But in hiding I resent not being really seen. My plan is to work each day to be true to myself before all else.
I am afraid of getting sick (COVID/other) and dying painfully. What else is new? I plan to VOTE for Joe Biden and hope his plans for getting rid of COVID as well as providing decency for our common good will be effective.
I have a fear of not being able to travel adventurously once I'm at the point of my life that I'm financially ready to. This ideal has been slight cloud over my life. my plan is been to keep myself in the best spiritual condition, metal health, and physical shape until that time comes. To Continue earning and creating future wealth. Hopefully in 10 years I will be there. In the meantime I will take some smaller trips.
I still fear making major decisions. And then again, I am afraid of not making any decisions. I'm afraid that I will be broke and unable to pay bills at all.
Not being able to live to m full potential. I do not want to die with the music still in me. I want to live and do all I have to experience this life to the fullest and push my own children to do that. More than limiting me, I find that in my enthusiasm and desire to do the best, and achieve the most I can hurt someone along the way. Not intending to do so but I have found it to be a lonely road to want to achieve your dreams and live your life to the fullest at times. I need to find balance and learn to perceive when I am pushing too hard to get there and bystanderds or even people I care get hurt.
I am not one to have fears but this year is a challenge. I am afraid that I will not get to see my Florida grandsons fire more than a year. They are still very young and I am missing so much of their life. The biggest fear is of my daughter, Marjorie, getting sick with Covid. She is an occupational therapist working with Hospice patients. She is going into homes in Florida where people are not always compliant with mask wearing and other preventative measures. She is the c one c who does the shopping and runs errands. Her boys are also in real school and exposed to so much. I am very close to Marjorie and I do not know if I could survive losing her. There isn't much I can do about all this other than to go on with my life, stay safe and hope that I'll get to be with my family eventually.
Over Eighteen years ago was diagnosed with MS followed by a diagnosis of Bipolar disorder. I cant say neither limited because I was focused on raising my two sons. I did not want to impose on them so that can follow their own dreams. I am constantly finding my new normal and have equipped myself with a toolbox. I have always gotten back up and always tried better. Three years at 57 I travel by myself to Israel in spit of my conditions. I met up with both of my sons (one was on youth trip the other was studying there. I wanted them to have a memory of the best me. I will continue doing what I am doing and hopping on making more memories.
I have a deep, long-lasting fear of disapporoval/rejection, particularly from authority. My perfectionism rears it's head anytime I feel like someone else might perceive me as stupid/a failure. It's really held me back in that I spend so much time premptively trying not to upset or incur the judgement of others that it cuts into me being truly me. I'm always hedging and hiding unless I know it's absolutely safe to be seen. I plan to continue the path of letting it go by pursuing emotional processing in various forms. Trauma-based therapy, breathwork, journalling, etc as well as continuing the gradual overload of being seen and failing openly. I hope that with enough practice the most severe protection responses will diminish to a point where I can simply sit with them instead of reacting.
My biggest fear is the emotional difficulty I will face in the winter when social isolation intensifies and my new outlet which has helped tremendously, bicycling, will be unavailable. Right now, I do not have an answer to the second part.
That someone will get away with some terrible things, but I can't do anything about it. I will talk to a professional and see if they can help me.
I fear rejection. I fear people not liking me. I fear being judged by others and talked about as being less than. I hate that I fear these things. I fear them even in my family relationships. I never feel that I am good enough. I'm not a good daughter or wife. I could be a better mother. I hope that my own daughters don't think this way. They are wonderful and enough, just the way they are. Just for being themselves. I don't know how to overcome this. I think maybe by just putting myself out there and seeing that I can be accepted for who I am right now, just as I am. I don't know if I will ever feel good enough. I hope I can.
Fear of owing too much money. The dread / fear of owing a fortune for a medical degree kept me from moving forward to apply for naturopathic school in the 80's.
I’ve had a fear of coming up short or getting things wrong in work and in life. It limits me as I’m in a defensive rather than forward-leaning posture. I plan on drawing more from my experience and self-confidence to be more level-headed in how I approach things I might otherwise second-guess myself on.
Not achieving my own goals and finding a focus and path as I turn seventy-five. In pretty good health - hence the travel and projects; but now feel that I have to live the legacy I want to leave. So the question that keeps my fearful of finding a passion, my element, my calling is staying the course and reach the result or achievement I aim for. I do think I need an accountability partner. Not sure if that is a coach or a friend. I can fill reams of notebooks BUT keeping the end in sight and staying the course are the issue
Could repeat verbatim my answer from last year. Sadly, things have gotten worse. How to reconcile if Trump is re-elected will be extremely difficult and will spell trouble for the world for a very long time.
I hadn't skateboarded in years because the first time I tried I got hurt bad, but now I want to try it again.
My fear is being unsuccessful and not having any direction in life. I am afraid my artist career won't go anywhere. It really scares me a lot. I don't know how to overcome it.
Fear of my limits due to disability. Pushing myself further outside of my comfort zone
This is a completely Covid related answer. I have barely gone anywhere, seen anyone, done anything outside of my home, and with good reason. The prospect of getting Covid is so frightening to me because I have no confidence that I won't be severely impacted long term or die. I have not weathered two different cancers and a life time of depression and migraines to be taken down by this virus. And while I'm really afraid of dying at the age of 64, I'm more worried about my family and how things could fall apart. There are too many unhealed wounds, and I'm often the glue that holds relationships together.
I am not sure if it qualifies as fear but I get really nervous when I need to speak in public. It is very important part of my job and I need to practice it and feel more comfortable with it. I think I should take a course to gain some tools to assist me with gaining confidence with it.
I am afraid of making decisions. I haven't had to make big decisions on my own for many years. I hope to get to the point where I trust my heart and my mind more, make a decision and follow it through.
A fear of mine is failure. I often feel like I am too hard on myself and think I'm failing more often than not. In this coming year, I hope I can teach myself that I'm doing the best I can every day.
I’m really afraid of dying before I’m ready. If I ever feel like I’ve done more good than harm in my life, that might bring peace To overcoming it. When I was younger, I really didn’t care. It was much more fun, most of the time. I think death wasn’t real or final. Or maybe it was the massive quantities of hallucinogenics that I used. Being broke or incapacitated is a big fear too. That’s the only time I regret not having kids so I think it’s a good thing I didn’t!
Getting COVID and not being able to care for my family.
Fear of losing connection with family and friends. Even though we have access to Zoom, texting, etc I still find it tough to keep connected.
My fear is that I really am not that smart as my parents pumped me up to be, if that makes any sense. I’m finding that I can’t just do what I did when I was a little girl, which was show everyone I could read a book, or play the piano, or impress them with my smarts. I think the only time I felt secure and felt noticed was when I was in Kindergarten. It wasn’t until I started the 1st grade at St. Mary’s in Oxnard that I always felt that I was under the watchful eye of the teachers. Kids bullied me since first grade. I remember Anthony Lopez telling on me because I pointed at him. I was so upset at him telling Sister Elizabeth that all I did was point at him. She had a stern talking with me. I think she spanked me. I told my mom about it but my mom didn’t believe me. I remember being really upset when Sister Elizabeth looked down on me. No one wanted to accept a dark brown girl into their classroom. So it was ever since then that I knew people looked at me or made assumptions about me before I could even express who I was. Kind of similar to when my great uncle molested me before I even knew what sex was. So because of this fear, and my mother’s skewed guidance of being the submissive, obedient little brown lady that everyone can rely on, I never trusted my voice. No, I trusted my voice at some point but for most of my life, I didn’t think anyone would listen. When I did express myself, it was a song, a show, a poem, a painting. All in the structure of a low-residency undergraduate and then later, an MFA program in Montpelier. I plan on letting that go by doing what I want, instead of what I need to do, which what I feel I have always done. And in doing that I feel that people have run over me. People have run over me quite often in my relationships and in the workplace. If I weren’t in a position to be run over, then maybe I wouldn’t be in the position that I am now. So do that MSW program in Baltimore. Write a song. Maybe 12 of them.
Fear of bad leadership that changes our lives in a negative way and threatens our planet, life itself. Unconscious people. Awe at the power of mother nature! Do what I can to stay awake. Conscious living.
I fear leaving my partner. I also fear staying in a bad relationship for the rest of my life. I have very little income and no savings. Where would I live? I don't know what to do or how to resolve this but I know no one else can help me and that the current situation feels unbearable. There must be a way out.
I fear that I do not fully operate understanding my white privilege- so thus, how that adversely affects marginalized people. I therefore limit myself in interactions and from speaking up. I plan to listen and then engage with selfless intent and hope for the best.
I don't know if its fear of failure or fear of success that freezes me. I think I will make a schedule for myself to get over the freeze.
Wow, bringing the heavy on Day 9, huh? Well, since this anonymous, I'll be honest, one of the biggest personal fears I've had has been love-related. I'm 25 years old and my most significant romantic relationship was in high school. I'm worried that I've been independent for so long that I'm now too closed off to pursuing love, that I'll always be too picky, that I'll decide I'm better off alone, or that I'm too stuck on memories to be happy in the present. But the only thing I can try to do is move forward and continue (once it's reasonably safe) to meet new people and give them a chance.
I fear the things that have not happened in my life - being wrongfully maligned by people in a position to make my life miserable. I steals my joy and creates anxiety. I try to imagine all the 'what ifs' and find a solution for them so that I am prepared to defend myself. And I turn it over to God, knowing that I am loved by Him, knowing that He has my future firmly in His Hands.
I am fearful of being in a lot of physical pain. I am in chronic pain anyway but I have had some really extreme experiences with pain. That fear motivates me to take the very best care of my body as I can and to investigate all possible paths and information for my health.
Fear of being perceived as flawed. It prevents me from taking risks, from opening my heart fully to others, from laughing. I've been struggling with this for years. I try to loosen up, but even that, I do in such a calculated way - I have to control it.
Death/sickness of my family Wine
I am terrified of not being able to support myself in retirement. My body is giving out and I won’t be able to continue to work more than another few years. I try very hard simply not to think too far ahead. One foot in front of the other...
I have had a fear of being in a relationship with a partner for fear of being hurt. I plan on releasing this fear by building up personal resilience so I will feel that I'll be okay no matter what.
Art's declining physical capacity has kept me from having a full range of choices on where to live. I know I am powerless except for how wound up I get in his issues.
I fear not living up to my full potential. To be able to create and live through many of the things I visualize and imagine.
I’m most afraid of people seeing my house, and of being needy. I don’t know exactly what ‘needy’ is, but I judge it most harshly in others, especially other women, who have everything and still demand more from others and get it. It infuriates me that narcissism gets awful people the things I dream of. People who are beautiful use it to get things given to them...they take and take and never have to do anything for others. I hate this so much, I fear it in myself. So I fight it endlessly, I refuse help and never let myself appear vulnerable. There must be a happy medium, but I’m so far away from it. And I’m alone.
I'm afraid that anyone I get close to will abuse me. I've come so far already, but this year I'm going to learn to trust.
I am afraid of being alone but also being hurt. This has limited in me connecting with people which has contributed to being romantically alone. I am afraid my standards are too high and that nobody will ever meet them. I am afraid of not being happy in the present. I plan on overcoming this by consistent meditation.
I am afraid we'll be stuck - stuck in this house, stuck in this city, state and stuck in this country. I am afraid we won't be able to sell our house. Afraid of moving someplace completely new where we don't know anyone, and afraid of NOT doing that. One thing I surprisingly am not afraid of is COVID. I am taking reasonable precautions, not putting myself in dangerous situations, and able to indulge my general antisocial nature. I am determined to spend this school year getting rid of excess stuff, and getting this house ready to sell. It is one thing I can control. I need to take charge of at least that.
I fear the direction this country is going. So much that I am strongly considering leaving. I believe that we are on the edge of losing all we hold dear as a country. People think I am being dramatic and it is my deepest wish that that is in fact true. But as a student of history, the signs are there for what may be unspeakable atrocities to come. I can't help but remember Hitler's Germany. I can't help but ask " do you think that when the genocide started the German people know how it would end.? The hate and fear started one scapegoated group at a time. The mass killing came later
I fear not having enough money to live the way I am accustomed once my alimony ends. I need to find a job that pays more. I am trying a little bit I do my value my own worth so I sell myself short. I need to keep looking, advocating for myself and stop letting fear and anxiety rule me.
Fear of falure of the unknown of my feelings when they overwhelm me. I will break the ice somehow (ice wall of fear etc) by step by step actions...saying to myself "we can do this" or just saying "hi" when feeling intimated
I've come to realise that as much as I want one, I am afraid of having a sexual relationship. It's limited the path my life has taken, which already has many physical limitations. I'm not sure how to overcome it, especially in the coming year in which everyone's lives are further limited by coronavirus and physical touch between many folk is illegal!
My greatest fear is that Trump will be reelected! Then I'm afraid we're all going to hell in a hand basket!
Funny, I think of myself as having basically no fears, but when I contemplated this question about 8 came to mind LOL! The most profound is my fear that something will happen to my dad and I will be the primary caretaker of my mom- it's not an "if," because it will likely happen, but it's a "when." I don't understand the complexities and intricacies of managing someone's entire life, from retirement accounts to health benefits to living situation to round-the-clock supervision... I adore my mother and would do anything for her. But it's scary, the thought of having to put my life on hold and my entire world turning upside down for a while. I am SO lucky to have Jen, but it is still difficult having no siblings, no cousins, and no close family aside from my 2nd cousins in Chicago. As for letting it go... I probably won't and that's ok, but I should talk with my dad more regularly about everything that will need to be managed. I put off those talks because it makes my brain spin and gives me immense anxiety, but that anxiety is part of being able to work through it ultimately. That all being said, I pray that health and happiness abounds all year(s).
I’m afraid of disappointing others and myself. I try to keep in mind that I am, like most everyone else, doing the best I can.
I'm not sure that it has limited me but I am fearful of the future of the United States and the world. Too many people want to believe in a world of made-up conspiracies. That decision leads to ruination. I can still hope that things will be better.
I have become fearless! Nothing is stopping me! I don't know what happened: is it getting older? my husband aging? having survived C19? I feel a fearlessness that I haven't since I was 20. Not physical this time but intellectual, artistic, political.
A fear I have now is Covid-19 and both my and mom's health!
I have heart failure. I'm only 63. My fear is not dying but living with the progression and losing more ability to function.
If this year has taught me anything, it is to live with no fear.
Current ones are the upcoming elections and what that looks like for our country and democracy. Not sure how I'll let it go if Trump wins.
That Trump will stay president and destroy the country. Vote and get other people to vote!
Oof the fear of abandonment and rejection is just monumental, with my partner it has definitely reduced, we've been together 3 years and I am finally starting to see that he isn't going to leave, but the fear of losing the love of my friends and family by trying to be my authentic self is hard and makes it really hard to make new friends and leads to a really unhappy compromise where I feel like I am not myself but I also find it hard to maintain relationships. In the next year I hope I can learn to be more me, get the tattoo, get the piercing, wear the clothes you want, dye your hair, life is too fucking short just do it! And the right people will stay through it .
A fear of things going wrong in the house because we can’t afford to put it right. I will try relaxation techniques.
That I'll end up with no money and no retirement money. Find a good job, I guess.
My biggest fear is to not be able to walk again. I’m letting go of it with Penelope’s help
A fear that I have is the fear of failure. It's limited me as my mindset is that I don't deserve success and happiness. And the moments of it that I get dissapear faster than I can blink my eyes. I plan on overcoming it by giving myself grace and reminding myself that I have value to give the world.
Fear of being alone. Ironically, it keeps me from reaching out to connect with others, because I am afraid of almost alienating myself. I need to give it to the Lord and to connect with Him first. With Him I am never alone and in His love I am never alienated.
My fear last yr was that I wouldn't be able to cope through the work stupidity: I took steps to move someplace heathier but it didn't go so well initially so I was still fearful I wouldn't cope. Thankfully, the main problem was removed, so it's much better now. So the only real fear I had is essentially gone, thankfully!
I fear being criticised for anything that comes from the core and heart of me. This is from childhood shaming. I want to get out from under the tyranny of this fear. I'm not sure how, but I think the Door Knob Project is just a small start.
Reading my answer from last year - who knew This year would be so freaking crazy? Pandemic - fires - murder bees? I’m scared of everything. Um scared of Trader Joe’s. How do I let it go? I don’t know.
Truthfully, I don't have any fears, especially anything that would limit me.
Still, a fear of people. One of the effects of the pandemic is that now I go out much less and have realized that I'm also less stressed in general because I'm dealing with other people a lot less. On the other hand, the inability of more than 50 percent of the people I do encounter to wear masks properly is pretty scary!
Not changing! I’m finding it challenging to have learned and seen the consequences from my mom, Gran and uncle dying these two years. Yet I find it difficult to change my behavior. I’m some ways I have begun to changed or have changed already. But I still spend entire days lost to an attitude that’s not helping me live a full life. I hope to practice seeing things differently. To learn to search and inquire not to judge. To go about my days with stubborn gladness.
My fear right now is not to get clients to get money for my bills. This fear doesn't limit me because I'm still trying to achieve clients. I didn't quit to return to a full time job... Right now, I'm in a program to build a online business to have a different aproach to the market and get clients and also, I'm trying to launch a project by my own, to allowed me to have my own business and help me start to have money, because since 2018 I'm trying to sell something that didn't result for me... untill now...
I've been afraid of being alone for a long long time. It has made me stay where I'm not treated well or really wanted. I'm working on building my own independent life (in the middle of a pandemic). I'm working on a plan to rebuild my career after taking care of the kids for so long. I want that as a source of connection to the world. I want an opportunity to know more people.
Getting COVID-19 and infecting my wife.
I have a fear of standing up to my wife when I think she is being unreasonable. It partially due to her response when this occurs, and partially due to my own insecurities. I think it makes us less healthy in certain situations than we could be so I would like to improve my own behavior during these times.
I have a fear of failure which prevents me from doing business ventures.
My fears, I believe, are shared by the planet. Covid-19 and The US Election on Nov 3, 2020 frighten me. The condition of the entire planet frightens me. I fear we are seeing this unique world spinning to its finish. I fear for every baby born right now. I fear war. I hatred and I fear devastation. And because I fear all this, I am better prepared to watch out for it and stay alert. Think we should all do the same.
I have a strong, dominating fear of what I think others think of me, my opinions, and what I do. I don't have a firm plan for overcoming it so I will have to work on developing one. Facing it head-on and something like exposure therapy would be a start.
My deep fear is that I've been over promoted, that I don't have a compelling purpose or vision that people are motivated to follow, that I'm not creative or capable enough to lead an organisation or make a real difference in other parts of my life. This stops me putting ideas and myself forwards. I really want to "feel the fear" and do it anyway this year.
One nanosecond In the present Rather than catastrophic In the future
I continue to have a fear of not being worthy or good enough, which often creates a barrier to action. After all, if I play it safe and don't take a chance, I won't risk failure or criticism. I plan to address this by focusing on being good enough for me. I have started to take steps in this direction over the past year, and intend to build on the foundation I've created in the coming year.
Fear of not contributing, not doing, not earning. Fear of stopping I guess. I don’t think I can overcome it - I think I have to embrace it and use it to get going
I experience anxiety and worry, but I wouldn't say I often experience fear. Okay, having learned to drive in my mid-40s, I will say I have actual straight-up fear about driving to or in places I'm not familiar with. I don't think there's much I can do about that, except to bite the bullet and keep doing it when it's necessary. I have some fear of Covid-19, which I manage by strictly observing the protocols; I plan to keep doing that.
My greatest fear is Trumpism and it is limiting my life...look at other countries around the world with just the pandemic, they have pulled together and are doing much better than us. So I plan to vote him out in November.
Being alone for the rest of my life. Or just continuing to be lonely while surrounded by family. It’s sad. I think a lot of people feel this way during COVID. I plan on searching out hobbies that make me happy then meeting people while doing said hobbies and building new friendships.
COVID-19 is my only fear now. I and my daughter have severe underlying conditions.
I have a fear of putting myself out there and saying that I like someone/ am attracted to them. I feel crippled by the fear of rejection. This year I want to get rejected and let myself move on from it. I want to see that it isn't a big deal for someone to say no.
I have a fear of money. I know that sounds strange, but I fear my own wealth. My worth. I sometimes feel unworthy. Not just financially, but I look at wealthy people and think they are better or smarter than me. Or more lucky. Well, I am lucky, I am smart, I am wealthy. Perhaps I fear I don't have enough. I DO have what I need though. And I can play with life, manifest other things, walk various pathways. Action and meditation will be the tools I use to find clarity, and acceptance of uncomfortable feelings [of imperfections]; then action again. Living in the unknown, moment by moment.
Since January, 2020, I've received three diagnoses or potential diagnoses that have terrified me. I would like to be able to accept the fact that growing older basically means things go awry physically and mentally, and somehow learn to live with these things. Also, if there are things to do to prevent these problems from getting worse, I need to have the will to do them.
I fear that my boyfriend will continue and escalate drinking and smoking heavily until his health and personality is permanently poisoned, and I will have no choice other than to leave him for the sake of my own sanity. I have tried to 'let it go' but it just gets worse. He's not aware of what he's doing, and I can't find any way to make him understand how I feel, or show him how much he is changing.
General fear of the future is a problem for me now. I need to practice mental discipline and I hope that some of the variables in my life will be resolved in a year.
Falling down and breaking my knee. It makes me hesitate to ice skate, and slow when I go downhill on hikes. There's no real reason for it. I think it has to do with my mother's overcautiousness when I was a small child. How to overcome/address? "Feel the fear. and do it anyway"? Maybe look into it a bit more deeply -- the knees are very important joints, especially as one gets older. Mobility, independence, etc - a lot is riding on the knee.
My fear is that I will never straighten up what needs to be organized. That so much of what I leave will be lost. I feel as though I could be lost in a moment.
I have many fears - lifelong ones and newer ones. I have many that are fundamentally out of my control (like what is happening in this nation in the march towards authoritarianism). The fear I have for my one child as a transgendered human being, however, can paralyze me. I am terrified for their safety and well being in this world. I've wanted them to keep hidden in some ways who they are because I didn't want to have them exposed even more to the harsh reality of how awful so many of our fellow humans are. I am working hard to stop myself. It is not my life. My child is almost an adult and needs to be able to live their life. They need to know they are loved without conditions by their family. They need to know they have a safe place to come back to as needed as they spread their wings and venture out into the larger world. This child of mine has a voice and has been starting to use it to stand up for others as well as themself. I cannot discourage this even as the frightened mother in me yearns to keep them safe. I am proud of this young adult and who they are. I need to learn to live with my fear. I need to learn how to keep this fear in perspective and use it to drive me to inaction rather than paralysis.
I suffer from PTSD, and it has become heightened as I have aged. Is it that the accumulation of experiences are a heavier load to carry? Is it that my physical body is not as strong to maintain my ability to reestablish equilibrium? I continue to work in therapy in better expressing my concerns, because in outloud expression, I am better able to observe myself and allow my body to integrate the triggers rather than to just respond to the stress. I will implement coping strategies more consistently. I will work on accepting pain, suffering, fear, and hurt as not being me, but rather emotions that I have to inform me about my response to the world. I am not sadness; I feel sad because of the losses that I have. I am not anxious; I am unsure of what will happen and feel that until it does or does not happen, I am impotent and a sitting duck. And my past experiences have been that there are not always fairytale endings. I hope that I am able to leave greater room for remembering that every toss of the coin still is a 50/50 chance of heads, no matter what has occurred prior to the current flip.
During the pandemic, I had a couple panic attacks. While they were explainable and fairly manageable. They have gotten me thinking about what other micro-anxieties have held me back in experiences in life. I know that my body image and relationship with diet culture affects my ability to be my true self and this limits how I show up to the world. I don’t want my daughter to inherit these anxieties so I plan to work through these this year.
That feeling of being an "impostor". That feeling that I am not doing enough or am not enough or deserving to be in the position I am in right now. A few months ago I found out that it's called Impostor Syndrome so I started to read and know more about it. I guess that's the first thing, recognizing it as part of normal human psychology. Then, I'll work my way to know and appreciate the accomplishments I do and positive feedback I get.
I have so many fears, where do I begin? I’d like to turn that on its head and make it be like the Elizabeth Barrett Browning poem, “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height. My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight.” I probably was just drawn to that because I believe my biggest fear is not being loved. So many friends, family members and even people I’ve only interacted with in a professional context have conveyed a depth of love for me. Old emotions about not being loveable, created by heartbreaking childhood experiences, still haunt me - not as much as they once were my entire driver, yet lurk not far from the surface, ready to emerge given the right trigger. My intention is to become more grounded in “I am loved” as an antidote to my moments of self-doubt arising from “I am unlovable.” I’m keeping a gratitude journal and will use this as a mantra through the year and beyond.
I have a fear of needles and doctors. This has held me back by not letting me go to the doctor. I don't plan on overcoming it.
One of my fears is that the world is falling apart and the future of the earth's ecosystems is at risk from global warming and over population. I'm not sure I can release my fears,but I can change my own behavior and encourage others to do the same. Taking positive action helps me to let go of some of my fear based anxieties.
I realized this year (2020) just how distracting fear is to me. I keep following it mentally wherever it leads and in some way I must be addicted. What does it give me? Distraction. Deviance from the real work. In divine texts when angels or symbols of God appear they start their convo with “do not be afraid”. So perhaps just beyond fear is connection, and faith. I want to notice fear and give it gratitude then let it slide past me so I can stand in the light of love. Specifically, I am releasing my fear of my own vision. What I see couldn’t ever be as scary as staying blind. Let me see you, lord.
the situation due to Covid and the uncertainty it has created makes it difficult to define a specific fear or concern ... its a mixture of uncertainty, unresloved career path, getting to Australia for the birth of my daughters child etc .... how to let it go will rely on the resilience referred to in previous questions
Growing old alone without companion. Overcome by living as active a lifestyle as possible. Still hope but not expecting to find anyone.
I have feared being useless or called out for difference. Scared, is all. I’m understanding, and living, more and more that this is just a way to keep people in line. That kind of fear leads to the mess we have now. So I have been, and will continue to, work on being my full self despite the comments, and I won’t personalize other people’s opinions of me.
The fear of being invisible or not truly belonging anywhere. It's been with me all my life. Faith
Being afraid of what people (my mother?) would think. Live my life for me.
Worrying. Again, I am going to try to follow my new mantra given to me in my spiritual moment: I reclaim the part of myself who does not worry.
I feel like my fear is two-fold—particularly with COVID—that I am not good/hot/skinny/pretty/hard-working enough to achieve my dreams, and that I am going to die young, alone, and with my dreams unfulfilled. I don’t know if so much letting go of that fear, but making peace with it—there’s so much uncertainty of what the future will hold. But I think it is possible to hope at the same time, know that the future is not written yet, and not pass off my dreams as silly or unattainable.
I am fearful about my children -- I fear my daughter's anxiety will get in the way of her leading a full life, I fear my son will be unable to manage himself in life. Neither of these fears are completely unrealistic, but when I parent from them nothing good happens. I just make my daughter more anxious and my son more unmanageable. I need to let go of these fears to parent from love. I have recently started thinking of the love as emanating from my neshamah and the fear from my yetzer hara. This helps me because it puts them a little outside myself and also keeps me from being too ashamed of the things I do when I act from fear -- I am able to imagine it as part of the epic battle all human beings are part of.
I'm still really scared of insomnia, but now that Craig brought my Xanax to work (I think), it's been better. I think this is probably because on those nights when I can't sleep, my heart rate is normal. When the insomnia was due to anxiety, it was harder for me to calm down and fall asleep. I hope to get even better at conquering this fear this year.
Mostly that I'm not capable enough to carry out my sacred purpose. I just keep trying to do what I see to do and change my thinking about it. I know that altering my thoughts will have a positive effect.
I have always worried that I will become my mother - the worst of my mother's traits. And now that she has dementia, I worry that, too, is my fate. If so, there's not much I can do about it -- stay active, stay healthy, and practice self compassion when I see my mind not as sharp as it used to be. Also, practicing whole acceptance of my mother would probably go a long way towards diminishing my own fear.
I am afraid of fish. While I am afraid I do not let it hinder me from enjoying water activities.
I suffer from Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria. It's a misnomer, but in essence, I feel things much more intensely than the average person. This means criticism, cruelty, and anger aimed at me can cause long-term depression and anxiety. I am terrified of putting myself out there for the public, although my dream has been to perform and create for the public. It's a hard road.
Uno de mis miedos es que por algún motivo pueda quedarme sin trabajo y no poder sustentar a mi familia. Pues creo que en mi trabajo doy lo mejor de mí, pero siempre hay injusticias, personas envidiosas, etc. que pueden perjudicarme. Seguiré trabajando como siempre lo hago.
I'm afraid of a second holocaust, of a political shift that makes me run. It's limited me because i'm always waiting for it, with a passport and liquid cash. it makes it hard to plan for the future or enjoy the present. I fear that the moment is coming, but I don't know. I doubt I can let go of it, but i need to use it as fuel rather than spinning my wheels in anxiety. I should have a solid plan b and ties abroad. I can also work to fight it here--before I decide to run. Since I can't let it go, I need to be the calm person on the boat and be thoughtful about my plans rather than a chicken with it's head cut off. I could be a leader to help others
I fear that I will never achieve long term goals due to wasting time due to my poor lifestyle habits. I do not plan on letting the fear go as it lets me know what to work on. I plan to overcome my poor lifestyle habits by using a simple militant system using a goal setting matrix, strategic plans and four daily objectives executed using the David Allen Getting Things Done system.
What to do with my remaining days is a fear: how many and how to spend them. With both parents living to 98 and me in blessedly good health, I could have a few decades left which is more than most folks get ... but what to do with those days? How do I spend current time, and how do I prepare for the end of my own time? Hopefully my constructing a daily prayer and meditation time can help get at both these questions. Having a new grandchild also helps buffer the end of days a little.
I have a fear of rejection that has limited my bravery in my job search. But now that I have been rejected a few times quite far into the interview process I am coming to grips with it. Those jobs might not actually be the best placement for me, maybe there is something else on my horizon that is a better opportunity. Plus, I can see that their decisions are not completely personal to me. They didn't reject me alone, they rejected me as the best fit for their needs. That's on them. I'm impatient about finding a new job. And the rejection adds to that. But the frustration is a symptom of my desire to move on, not a symptom of any personal qualities that were rejected.
The fear of the destruction of our Republic by the Republican Party. My emunah overcomes my fear, but does not dispel it. I don't know what I can do about it, as I know the fear is justified.
So afraid of the upcoming election. I'm not listening or reading any news right now. What seeps in leaves my stomach in knots. I'm not sure I have to face this fear. Either things pass or it will be forced on me, and everyone, as reality. I how I read this in a year and laugh.
I worry most about the existential stuckness that everyone seems to be in. All the old (albeit only marginally sustainable and deeply inequitable) societal supports are falling apart, and I at least feel powerless to effect change. Like anyone else, I fear loss -- of "my" stuff, my livelihood, my funds, my freedoms. I fear for the future of the country. I worry about all my children and what kind of society they are living in, what will be their avenues for living? I worry about myself taking on too much of other people's responsibilities and burdens, and burning myself out.
That we won't avoid the worst of climate change, and my son's lifetime will be full of suffering. Letting it go or overcoming it is a work in progress.
I making new friendships, because I am afraid of rejection. I'm going to try to make an effort to be more inclusive, and try to do fewer solo activities--bring people in to the things I'm already doing!
I fear my mother’s inevitable decline into a state where she needs to enter aged care. She is 97 and still living independently but that can’t continue I indefinitely. I will just have to come to terms with it and learn to cope with the challenges this will throw up.
I'm afraid of gaining back the 50 pounds I lost over the last year. It's a stupid fear, but I worry that my will-power isn't going to hold up in the long run, and I'll end up just as obese and unhealthy as I was before I started paying attention.
intimacy - I said it last year and yes I did do something about it. I am finally in a position where I could have a relationship and yes its frightening and yes I am unsure, but with the help and support from my partner i might even get there. Let's say its a work in progress.
Yesterday I turned in notice and I will work until the end of the month. If we can live frugally then we might be able to make it to full retirement age from our savings. Most likely we will need additional income though. It’s a huge change but no jobs are interesting to me right now and pay is dropping substantially next month. I am following my heart on this and believe that not having a job will allow freedom to do many things, including helping others. Fear has kept me working for financial security, but how much is required to be secure? Always more? If I keep working for more will I ever quit in time to enjoy life? How much longer will I have reasonably good health? We will have to adjust to less income and will spend it all to get to full retirement age. Will social security still be there and be enough to live upon with a $425 a month pension? The house is paid off and our daughter lives in town so I hope we can get by. Who knows what tomorrow holds? Why spend most of the time working? And why not live close to the earth? In a year if it’s clear we can’t live on our savings then hopefully there will be some part time work that will be available and agreeable. Fear of not having enough has kept me working excessive hours and missing too much of family life. I’ve been a slave to my employer way too long.
I fear that I'm not enough self-confident to start my own business in tour guiding. I've had many happy customers, but I also feel that I have so many colleagues who seem so passionate about their work in the same field, I feel that I'll never be like them. I've already thought about talking to one to them who's trained new guides and asking for advice on how to improve my skills.
I have a fear of getting a diagnosis of Dementia. This hasn’t limited me, but I’ve undertaken some online courses to learn about it. I know there’s lifestyle changes I can make to improve my physical, mental and social life that can slow down the potential onset of dementia.
My fear is socialising. I have lost soany projects due to bad networking skills. I'm trying to come out of it this year deliberately by participating in many social gatherings as possible.
Fear of leaving Bahir Dar. It has limited my dating life, my social life, my travel life, my exposure to ideas, foods, people and places, my return to climbing and even my enjoyment of life because I was depressed there. I will overcome this by being out of Ethiopia for a few more months, by swearing to many people that I won't go back to living there again, by getting a nice furnished place in Addis and by starting a sports routine in Addis.
I am afraid of failure, especially rejection. I’m afraid that I’m falling behind. I’m afraid that none of my dreams will come true. There is only one thing I can do in response to this failure. I need to keep moving, keep writing, keep learning. Something will come out of all this